A very interesting article by Autism and Oughtisms about the use of the term “intellectually disabled“.  In one case, it can be used as a replacement for “mental retardation” (IQ < 70), and in another it can be used to describe a disability that affects the mind rather than the body (“physical disability”).  But intellect is not intelligence – people with autism can have an intellectual disability (in that it affects the mind rather than the body), and also be very intelligent.

Language can be a rather slippery construct at times!

Epidemic Silence: Under-diagnosis and the insult of autism, by Autism and Oughtisms.  Discusses the hushed tones and whispered conversations about whether or not to tell a parent about concerns that their child is showing autistic traits.

“Carers, family, parents, need to hear that it is not an insult to think or say that a child might have autism. It is a potential fact, to be investigated and determined either way. This silence, reflects and encourages a society that views my son – and his autism – as something to be ashamed of. The only shame I feel is being part of a society that thinks not-causing parents offense, is more important than speaking out for a child who can’t speak out for themself.”

The author of this article has an invisible disability – specifically, she has no bowel, and she describes why she needs to use a disabled toilet – and the reactions she’s faced from others.  While there are some extremely inconsiderate people who use disabled facilities for no medical reason, there are also many who have a very valid reason that is nobody else’s business.  Let’s stop tutting about “non-disabled” people using disabled facilities.

There was great sadness in our house yesterday when we heard that Leonard Nimoy had passed away.  We began watching Star Trek together as a family after reading Tony Attwood’s book “The Complete Guide to Asperger’s Syndrome” – he suggests using popular television programmes to explain and teach aspects of social behaviour, and Star Trek was the most age-appropriate of those recommended.  Mr Spock (Leonard Nimoy’s character) in The Original Series, and Data (the android in The Next Generation, played by Brent Spiner) both have many Aspie traits – and hence this loss was keenly felt.

As I was reading the various tributes around the web, I came across this very significant letter that Leonard Nimoy wrote about Spock, replying to a cry for understanding from a mixed-race teen (in 1968).  And I immediately thought – how true this advice is for all children (people!), especially those who don’t fit in, yet have a lot to offer.

“Which is more important – being popular, or being true to yourself?”

“Understand yourself, and know your value as a person”.

“Popularity is merely the crumbs of greatness”.

The Anxious Child: Red Brain, Green Brain, by Kelly (BeAFunMum blog). When your child is anxious – don’t try to deal with the issues, because the emotions will get in the way.  Deal with the emotions first (using a “toolbox” of regulation strategies), and the issues will become much easier.