Competitions are tricky. Very subjective. So how do you know what the judge will like? Here’s a list that might help.

• Is the judge an author?
  • Yes she is.
• What type of things does she write?
  • Funny rhyming picture books.
  • Funny poems.
  • Poems about nature and feelings.
• Should you read any of her work?
  • It might help.
• What did she read as a child?
  • A.A. Milne, she particularly loved When We Were Very Young and Now We Are Six – and ‘Binker’ is one of her favourite poems. Why? Because of the innocence and the repetitive lines – that begin, And I have to do it for him… & And then I eat it for him… so funny and adorable I actually tear up when I read them.

Binker—what I call him—is a secret of my own,
And Binker is the reason why I never feel alone.
Playing in the nursery, sitting on the stair,
Whatever I am busy at, Binker will be there.

Oh, Daddy is clever, he’s a clever sort of man,
And Mummy is the best since the world began,
And Nanny is Nanny, and I call her Nan—
But they can’t
See
Binker.

Binker’s always talking, ‘cos I’m teaching him to speak:
He sometimes likes to do it in a funny sort of squeak,
And he sometimes likes to do it in a hoodling sort of roar …
And I have to do it for him ‘cos his throat is rather sore.

Oh, Daddy, is clever, he’s a clever sort of man,
And Mummy knows all that anybody can.
And Nanny is Nanny, and I call her Nan—
But they don’t
Know
Binker.

Binker’s brave as lions when we’re running in the park;
Binker’s brave as tigers when we’re lying in the dark;
Binker’s brave as elephants. He never, never cries …
Except (like other people) when the soap gets in his eyes.

Oh, Daddy is Daddy, he’s a Daddy sort of man,
And Mummy is as Mummy as anybody can,
And Nanny is Nanny, and I call her Nan …
But they’re not
Like
Binker.

Binker isn’t greedy, but he does like things to eat,
So I have to say to people when they’re giving me a sweet,
“Oh, Binker wants a chocolate, so could you give me two?”
And then I eat it for him, ‘cos his teeth are rather new.

Well, I’m very fond of Daddy, but he hasn’t time to play,
And I’m very fond of Mummy, but she sometimes goes away,
And I’m often cross with Nanny when she wants to brush my hair …

But Binker’s always Binker, and is certain to be there.

• Lewis Caroll, Alice in Wonderland and Alice through the Looking Glass – she loved the poems ‘Jabberwocky’ and ‘The Walrus and the Carpenter‘ – just brilliant but she loved all of the poems really.
• C J Dennis is another favourite and she very much liked this poem – ‘Upon the Road to Rockabout’ from A Book for Kids.

Upon the road to Rockabout
I came upon some sheep —
A large and woolly flock about
As wide as it was deep.

I was about to turn about
To ask the man to tell
Some things I wished to learn about
Both sheep and wool as well,

When I beheld a rouseabout
Who lay upon his back
Beside a little house about
A furlong from the track.

I had a lot to talk about,
And said to him “Good day.”
But he got up to walk about,
And so I went away.

• Follow the instructions to the letter.
  • Nothing puts someone in a bad mood more than an entry that doesn’t follow the instructions printed on the entry form. When a judge has hundreds of stories to read please help make the process as seamless and as painless as possible.
• And last but not least – after all of that, be yourself, have fun and know that I absolutely love reading all of the stories that I’m sent. And if you can make me laugh and cry in the same story you’ll certainly catch my attention.

Best of luck everyone and get rhyming!