Seeing me in you.

Looking into your eyes,

I lose myself in their depths,

My hands in yours,

Seem to melt all my troubles away.

Fingers entwined, feet in sync,

I can take the world head on,

Your faith in me,

Is much more than my trust in myself.

Taking you up in my arms,

Kissing your cheeks as I hear you giggle,

My dear little daughter,

It’s the sweetest sound to my ears.

When I look back into the past,

To not have heeded to your father,

I feel absolutely blessed,

You’re nothing less than God’s gift to me.

 

Sketched by - Graciously Yours!
Sketched by – Graciously Yours!

All those mothers who fought to keep their girl child alive whether as single mothers or fighting against their families — You rock!

Graciously Yours!

Accept India’s Daughter.

On 16 December, 2012, the Nirbhaya rape case rocked the whole of India. For a long time, we protested, came out on the streets, demanded change in laws, wanted the rapists hanged, shouted slogans of women’s empowerment, wanted safety for women. The fire is still seen, the flames are still being fanned, the coals are still red and we’re still waiting…

 

 

 

BBC released a documentary on all of this titled “India’s Daughter”. And they’re being taken to task now.

 

Times Now, a prime time English News Channel, of the Times group flashes :

 

“Is it ethical to reveal the identity of Nirbhaya?” 

 

“Is BBC being sensitive by showing the pictures of the victim?”

 

“Should a rapist be given a platform?”

 

“Voyeurism or journalism?”

 

Times of India, a leading English daily in India, from the same Times group, reports with full sensationalism :

 

“Nirbhaya gang rape convict blames victim for full assault.”

 

They went on to report that the rapist says if the Government changes the punishment under the law to death row, the rapists will not make an attempt to leave the raped girl alive. These are words spoken by one of the rapists who even after two and a half years of jail, has the audacity to say it all. From inside the jail when on death row.

 

Most of our media is happily making the BBC journo a scapegoat. The video has been banned. They found someone to blame. They found a new story to sell. They raised burning questions and shouted their lungs out, all in the wrong direction! I am sorry but that is how I feel about things! Wait. I am not even sorry. Thanks to my irritation at the media, I chose to watch the documentary myself to judge!

 

India’s Daughter.

 

Yes, it reveals the identity of the victim. She has a name. And it isn’t Nirbhaya. It’s Jyoti Singh. Her name means “light”.

 

Yes, it shows pictures of the victim. And her parents chose to do that by free will. Who are we to question it?

 

Yes, it recounts the whole horror of what she had to go through. Of what all us women had to go through when we read those gruesome accounts of the rape that went viral all across the internet within days of December 16, 2012. I still feel nauseated when I think about the pain the lady must have lived through.

 

So what? Is that what we should really be worried about? What ethics and victim privacy are we talking about? The lady is no more. All her parents have are her memories. The least we could do is honour those. And let her parents get a platform to speak.

 

I have questions of my own to ask.

 

  • Why are the rapists still alive?
  • Why even after two and a half years in jail, the rapists seem to not have even a drop of remorse in their blood?
  • Why are we not afraid of the law and instead believ it is our birthright to circumvent the law?
  • What has been done to ensure that the juvenile rapist who will be released in December, 2015, has indeed been reformed or not?
  • Why do those rapists and many others like them believe that it is their right to tell off girls to where they apparently belong – the household, by raping them and shaming them?
  • Why does that rapist say that the girl should have endured it all and not fought back?
  • If on death row he can still say that, what would be the extent of vileness in his thoughts if he was out on the roads?
  • Why are we worrying more about giving these rapists a platform and less about all those endless rape victims who aren’t being given justice yet?
  • Will shoving the video out of sight help to shove the grim mindset aside too?
  • Will educated men still believe that women are to be inside the house to be safe, irrespective of our domestic violence data?
  • How long before we come out of denial and accept that our society needs to start treating women as fellow human beings?

 

Each person in India has a right to be defended in the court of law. I’m happy that we’re democratic enough to be giving a chance to these rapists as well. But trust me on this, that when you read what the defending lawyers had to say, your soul will shudder!

“The moment she came out from her house with a boy who was neither her husband nor her brother, she left her morality and reputation as a doctor as well as girl’s morality in the house and she came out just like a woman. A female is just like a flower, it gives a good looking, very softness, performance, pleasant. But on the other hand a man is just like a thorn, strong, tough enough. A flower always needs protection. If that flower is in a gutter, it is spoilt. If you put that flower in a temple it will be worshipped.”

 

Such crude and filthy thoughts from educated men with professional degrees makes me cringe in horror at how bloody patriarchal and backward the Indian society still is. I feel sorry for the women who live with them and bear with them.

 

She was a 23 year old bright medical student on her way to fulfil the dreams of her parents and get them out of poverty. What was her fault exactly? That she was a girl? That she tried to build a life for herself? That she had parents who trusted her? That she was independent and fierce? That she was confident? That she fought back?

 

Jyoti Singh (1989-2012).

 

Open your eyes, India. You’re half awake. Get out of bed. Whip those sheets off. Open the curtains. The light is out there. See it, embrace it and honour it.

 

Graciously Yours!

Spreading love.

A fellow blogger, Umber, has very kindly set me to task for not writing regularly! I’ve been asked to define LOVE my way, in 10 lines and 4 words in each line.

Well, I agree with Mary Crawley when she says, “I don’t care a fig about rules.”

Here is my poem, if it can be called one :

What Is Love?
Love is your parents trust,
Love is your grandma’s food,
Love is your grandpa’s stern looks,
Love is your sibling’s pillow fights,
Love is your cousin’s concern,
Love is your friend’s hug,
Love is your lover’s touch,
Love is the stranger’s help,
Love is your pet’s excitement.
Love is endless…
My favourite quote on love would have to be “When I saw you I fell in love, and you smiled because you knew.” It doesn’t get better than this, does it?
Warning : Theoretically it’s love at first sight, practically it’s lusting.
I like it for the bond of understanding and bridge of acceptance it creates between the two.
And as for the nominations to carry forward this chain of love, I’d choose (in random fashion!) :
And all other bloggers reading this! Start the chain if you still haven’t become a part of it.
Graciously Yours!

Wading through our struggles.

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Continue reading “Wading through our struggles.”

Coming Soon : Pill to erase specific memories!

This is not a joke!

Scientists have found a way to erase specific memories from the human mind. Before you continue reading this, let me inform you that this post doesn’t evaluate the researches of these scientists. I don’t think we need to discuss how good or bad a turn of events it could lead to but just appreciate for once the human mind as researched by them. Are we clear?

Continue reading “Coming Soon : Pill to erase specific memories!”

Big Fat Indian Wedding (With visuals!)

On special request of a fellow blogger Cat Jenkins (do check out her blog!) I am putting in a few pictures of the Big Fat Indian Wedding of last week.

I hope you enjoy these as much as we look like we did!

Continue reading “Big Fat Indian Wedding (With visuals!)”

Big Fat Indian Wedding!

Anyone who’s seen an Indian wedding knows that it’s mostly about glitz, glitter and a lot of gala (and gold too!) Well, it’s also about rituals, heavy clothes (so heavy that you can get tired of holding them up and trying to fold them), tensions and family drama along with a lot of fun and lavishly sumptuous buffets!

I loved all of that and so much more about my brother’s wedding. Beginning with the beginning :

Continue reading “Big Fat Indian Wedding!”

Sober or drunk?

News for you! My closest cousin is getting married with just 6 more days to go! (Say congratulations y’all!)

Warning : Not for people below 18. And my parents.

Continue reading “Sober or drunk?”

Cheers to life! Again.

image

Dear biker,

Thank you for ramming into me yesterday. You put my life into perspective again. Of late I’d started giving more leeway into my life to people who probably didn’t want it. The heart wants what the heart wants after all. I had started forgetting it was my life and no one deserved more attention than me.

Thank you for reminding me how precious life is and how granted we take it at times! Checklists start remaining unchecked, dreams get postponed, relations are assumed to remain good forever and change is detested.

Thank you for giving me the chance to make amends before it was too late to to only regret. You need something as strong as that moment for the fact to dawn upon you that some things have to be accepted as they are. For your own betterment.

Thank you for changing your bike tyres regularly and oiling your brakes well!

Thank you for being a good biker and letting me get off with  the least bruises possible!

Still sane enough to find positives from the negatives,

Graciously Yours!

P.S. : Mother, if you were to ever know about this, don’t scream at me please! That may be the reason why you didn’t know this in the first place 😛

Life Notes #8.

First things first. Apologies for not having written for so long!

Now, let’s come to the point. There’s this place in Calcutta called burrabazaar (literal translation : Big Market). See, how we do it? No need to be creative or rack your brains to think of a good name! We also have New Market and A.C. Market! That’s for another post! So this burrabazaar is a market where you can find everything from clothes, accessories, footwear, food, household appliances, craft supplies, electricals, et al! Name it and you’ll get it. It’s like Target under not one roof. It’s spread over countless small shops and roadside stalls and single moving vendors. You see it also has its own Wiki page in case you want to know more.

And considering there’s a wedding coming up, it’s sort of customary for us to visit the market at least once, irrespective of whether we actually buy anything or not. For this visit it was my turn with Mother. The younger one sneaked out of it for her own good. Going there after four long years, I’d forgotten the fight I would have to put up just to avoid falling in those open drains, moving handcarts and freshly dug up tunnels in the middle of roads! This is what I mean when I say road by the way :

These roads are a burrabazaar speciality!

My Mother is a wonder! She sneaks into the smallest of spaces available and just serenades her way out of the human maze to get to exactly where she wants in that maze of roads lined with a more complicated maze of shops! And I am something like this :

I need to catch up with Mother!!! (Or I am going to be so lost!)

Leaving aside the fact that the shopping spree was successful for Mother at least, I also realized that there are times when your phone camera will just not give you what you want. Every time I tried standing and clicking a picture for you people to see, the crowd around seemed to just get me moving again! You see, you just don’t stand, loiter or window shop there!  You keep moving!

This is what I came up with. I know I am a better photographer than what these pictures portray!

That would have been a dug up trench if I'd stood my ground for another second!
That would have been a dug up trench if I’d stood my ground for another second!
Get me out!!!
Get me out!!!
Shoes off in saree shops!
Shoes off in saree shops!

And now I gotta go because I need to go shopping again! Dear brother, please get married soon!

Note to self : Next time, if there is a next, keep your elbows to your chest, cell phone safely tucked in your pocket, and march ahead with head held high! And stop staring at those colourful trinkets on sales and bags hanging overhead. You’ll hopefully not get lost then! (Doesn’t mean I got lost this time.)

Graciously Yours!

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