Kenny made a comment to me the other day that its been weeks, more like months since I last posted. I don't remember what i last posted.

Anyway...happy new Year!

I don't even know where to start, i'm not going to write 8 pages and catch you all up on my life...so I won't.

A few points of excitement...

Job is going well, very busy...but as I last stated not going to talk about the job too much on here, so thats all I have to say about that.

Howie and I are great. We've been together 10 wonderful months now and living together for over 6 months. I feel like I've known him my whole life. He's become one of my best friends.

For Christmas I got a fancy shmancy macbook...sooo pretty, I'm writing on it right now (another reason why I have NO excuse to be updating this thing) I got lots of other things too, DVDs, some clothes, lots of things for the apartment.

The apartment is basically done as far as needing things goes, We have a mirror and two large frames (with pics of flowers from Jamaica) that need to be hung. We recently got a Wii (yesterday) I've already played it to the point of a sore arm. I love it.

One more addition to the apartment will come in spring..and that is...POPSICALE. I'm so excited..a little nervous but mostly excited.


Howie got me the best present i've ever gotten from anyone. He's taking me to Florida, Port. St. Lucie to be exact to see the Mets play in spring Training. We're going for 4 days, 3 games and a day at Epcot/Disney World. Its going to be fantastic. I can't wait.





It finally started to get cold here...Not happy about it mind you, but non the less, gotta deal. Howie and I waited for 3 hours this past Sunday to try and get student tix for Jersey Boys, but failed since we were like 8th in line. DAMN IT ALL! Oh well, soon enough we'll get to see it. I saw Spring Awakening and loved it. I saw it with my parents, who also loved it.

I think thats really all the juicy stuff to update. Howie is sitting next to me going over his email as well. we'll prob. head to bed soon being that we suck at waking up. I used to be good...I dunno what happened...actually I do. We have the best bed in the world, its so soft and warm and I am in love with the down comforter..mmm i think i'm going to go to bed now, just so i can snuggle in. PLUS Howie is the best cuddler in the world.


Ok, i'm done.

xoxox

well, where to start...I don't even know. I don't remember the last time I even posted. Probably a month ago. I'll try to make this quick. I'll just summarize.

Went to Canada w/ Howie, saw a bunch of the family. They all loved them (not surprising) it was great seeing so many people, playing w/ cousins, almost winning a game of Euchre. I also ate a lot. Oh and I also found an allergy medicine that works the best out of any. Its a nasal spray and it shrinks my nose membranes or something. It really helps...very exciting...maybe not for you guys, so i'll shut up about it haha.

Greg came in town to visit which was so cool. I played games with him and Ivan and Matt...it was so weird cuz it wasn't weird at all (Maybe Matt, you feel differently) anyway it seems like this friendship thing might actually work. WEIRD haha.

Howie and I just got back from our vacation in Jamaica. Amazing doesn't even begin to describe my experience there. It was beautiful. Basically go watch a commercial on Jamaica on the tv and that was where I was. Of course i was in a resort so I didnt get to see what the country was really like...but I did see a little bit. Anyway i want to go back right now...my tan is starting to fade (and i wore sunscreen like a crazy woman every day)

2 weekends ago was gogeloween and it was fantastic. It was great seeing all of my friends in one place partying it up in fun costumes. Can't wait till next year.

You can go to my photobucket webpage to look at pictures from both gogeloween and jamaica (howie dressed as tina turner for halloween is worth the trip alone. just go to photobucket.com search "actnhols" and my whole photoalbum should come up. Click on whatever you want to see..the end.

i've made the decision that i am no longer going to discuss work on this sight, because i love work and i love who i work with and a random rant getting out into the atmosphere isn't worth it to me. i'll rant to my friends and howie in person...

Happy Monday

OH OH OH
I won the lottery for Chorus Line on Saturday so i got to see the show for $20 4th row. Everyone who has the time/ability/cash should do so. GREAT SHOW!

so i am going to canada on saturday for 2 days for thanksgiving. YAY. Its an hour and a half flight. I could give two hoots about all the liquid bans/unbans (is that a word?) i just want my flippin' glamour magazine so i'm entertained for an hour and a half. Anyway, I have searched many sights and the only info i come across is the quart size clear plastic bag with the 3 oz bottles of stuff blah blah blah. I'm like, is this all we're allowed on, liquid? But i found this sight that had a little more information. Can I bring my magazine? It does not say, however, I am allowed to bring my "toy transformer robots" on the plane according to this sight. Thank Goodness because I don't know where I'd be if i didn't have my toy transformer robots.

Anyway I'm gonna try to bring a magaizne, and we'll see what happens. And for the hell of it, I'm gonna bring a toy transformer robot...cuz I can.

I'm also allowed to bring sharp scissors under four inches...what a dumbass plane rule.

http://www.tsa.gov/travelers/airtravel/prohibited/permitted-prohibited-items.shtm#1

So flash back to last Saturday I hung out w/ my drug dealer aka Seany the pharmacist and Kenny. We got ice cream, played a game and I got my monthly stock of crack...otherwise known as birth control pills.


Anyway, I had it in my purse all day..Later that evening I was with Ken and Steve. Ken came over for Rosh Hashanah Dinner (happy new year btw) and then Steve joined us later for dessert. We were about to leave to go out and get liquer for Karen's party and then I noticed...bc still in the big CVS package in my bag. So...I run upstairs plop it down and leave.

Next Day waiting for Howie and his friend Michael to pick me up so we can make the train back to the city to see the flaming lips concert....So they are like 15 minutes late...we basically don't have a shot of making this train but i guess we're gonna try anyway. Sitting in the car and i realize i forgot my bc...So i go upstairs...tear appart my bed..find a bunch of bird crap (gross i know, i have no idea how popsi managed to poop underneath my blanket when my bed was made...weird. ANYWAY..couldn't find them..so left for the whole week knowing i would have no bc on me...not amused. Anyway I asked Seany if I'd be able to start it this Sunday and he said yes, but it would mess up my cycle. I'm guessing I'll just bleed a week later meaning i'm going to feel bloated the last couple of days in Jamaica..not awful..but not great. Maybe i'll hold off till i'm home, i mean i'll be in a different country so maybe my body will be messed up hehe..one can hope for a messed up body for this situation.

So I get home last night, don't have too much time till Jojo's party (which was awesome btw even though the hopper was quite crowded) couldn't find it. Searched my room for like a half an hour this morning..couldn't find it. Where the hell do bc run to? I pulled my whole bed apart and remade it...looked under my bed, found some very sad stuffed animals, who are now happy...looked in my closet, all my drawers, all my dressers on the tops, and the two chairs in my room. OH and in my desk cabinets. I'm like BC WTF..i'm getting pissed now. I go and look again for the 10th time on my nightstand table and i'm like..its a bag, with bright green writing, where is it....then i find it. its in a cvs bag (which i forgot) which has dull red righting..the bag is smaller, although still big enough that i shouldn't have missd it so many times. I mean last week, when i was in a rush, fine...but i should have found it last night.

Anyway, the mystery is over, the bc is found. my cycle will once again be normal, and there will be no babies in my near future.


HURRAY!

This week flew....with the extra drama it made the week go so fast its unbelievable...although I'd still rather have a dramaless week.

I'm normal again. I was spazzing a little too much. A little over-reaction from me as far as what was going on around me. I think I was just tired and didn't want to deal with stuff that i never intended on dealing with in the first place. But i'm fine...i really don't feel like caring haha.

Today is uber slow. I have 0...count that 0 submissions on my desk. I think one will be arriving shortly, but its like almost two and usually i have atleast 5 completed on my desk. I mean this is supposed to be the hardest part of the day ...right now...I read all the news, i am reading a blog that is really fun (but don't really want to read it for 5 hours)...so hence i'm blabbing in here to kill a few minutes.

Tonight I'm going out for Joanna's birthday. I'm really excited because I get to see a lot of the gang, and after this weeks mild drama, it'll be nice to see my friends. Howie is staying in the city working on a couple of projects. I'll miss him. I have to pack this weekend for Canada. I'm going next weekend. This Sunday starts the madness...actually Wednesday does..with mom's birthday. Then Canada, then howie is having friends visit for like a week..Pumpkin Picking, Dad's birthday, Jamaica, 2 Halloween parties...Also going to two shows as of now...1 is some kinda ABC thing for work, the other is Matt's show (I'm taking the plunge folks) OH and HOwie's parents are staying in the condo the weekend before halloween (when the two parties are) so i have to make sure the place is nice and tidy for them...its like WTF MATE?

Alright i'm going to go find something else to do now...this is boring me haha

Don't you ever wish that you can change one stupid action that would stop a series of actions from happening. Well thats how i'm feeling right about now.

Because I did one harmless thing of discussing my feelings of a friends, shit grew so fast that I ended up having to apologize to someone I have absolutly no respect for. I am so upset in a number of ways. Upset for opening my damn mouth, Upset for past events that I've since now let go but alas, the feelings resurfaced. And I'm upset for being so naive about this stupid STUPID situation...did i mention its stupid.

now all i want to do is throw this dumb laptop against the wall, go to bed and end Tuesday, but I cant do that. And even though I was the "big person" and ended things as cordial as possible...I don't feel better whatsoever. Only worse.

Damn it all I'm pissed.

I FORGOT

yesterday i went to the Flaming Lips concert w/ Howie, Howie's bro Randall, Howie's Dad, and Howie's friend Michael...

It was really really good...a little loud, but so much fun...i played with lasers, and balloons and listened to howie's fav. band. I was tired, but it was def. worth it. Howie is going again tonight. I'm gonna stay in, catch up on tv, and make us lunch. oh and food shop...thats important.


2 weeks till Canada...as of now 32 cochranes/cochrane relations will be there. Howie wants to start learning their names ahead of time. I have to practice Euchre


1 month till Jamaica...gonna pee my pants from excitement..oh damn, just did...hah

In a few days it will be my 6 month anniversary w/ my job. I heart it. I can have frustrating times but all in all everyone I work with is great. I was given a huge responsibility today which felt great. I was already given a bonus a few weeks ago (don't have to tell you how great that felt, on my pride and bank account) and a lot of the clients always tell me how much they appreciate me.

Some great shows are coming to bway..or already coming. We have clients in almost all the them so there is a big chance I'll get to see a lot of great shows. I really REALLY want to see Chorus Line...we have a client in it, but even though we do, as of now they're not even letting the agents get tix to the shows, no less the assistants. One of our agents got to sit in on the dress rehearsals. I may have to shell out the 80$ to see it..but i'm waiting..maybe mr. boss man will take us....Even if not, atleast its tax deductable :)

This weekend was fun-filled. I went to Howie's for Rosh Hashanah on Friday and then had my own dinner on Saturday (kenneth joined us for some yummy chicken..and ate 2 potato pancakes..GOOD JOB KEN!)...he doesn't read this anyway

Saturday night was a fun party at Karens (thanks again Karen) there were two funny moments that evening. One involved a red bic lighter and the other involved 7 boys (most were strangers) who all wanted to see my "boobs" because they heard how great they are...really, thanks Chris and Jay...I couldn't thank you enough. As flattered as I was..I didn't give them the goods...as I screamed out in the suburbs of Jersey "You Can't See my Boobs...you didn't earn them!"

Let that be a lesson to all you reader perverts

So I think 3 law and order breakdowns just printed out in the last hour...tomorrow is going to be busy.

Saw Tarzan...it was alright, more then a spectacle then anything. Saw Ave Q for the second time...loved it yet again. The new cast is great (except Rick Lyon who's from the original cast and he's always been great) Went to the Bronx Zoo..saw lots of animals. The monkies were awesome. Celebrated 6 months w/ my sweetie, very very happy.

A little thought...ya know how when you talk about something with someone, or something happens and you end up dreaming about it. Well that happened to me this weekend.

I was on the phone with Ivan talking about our feelings on the new Survivor and we got to talking about my old boyfriend Matt. You see, Matt kinda introduced me to Survivor, so its kind of inevidable for him to enter my mind whenever the show is mentioned. Anyway, Ivan was mentioning how Matt is going over to his place to watch Survivor and play a game of Risk (another activity we three did together) Anyway, this whole break-up thing not only was tough on me and I'm guessing Matt..although i can't say for sure since I'm not him and he is the one who innitiated it, but also Ivan.
Ivan: "Can't we all just be friends and play a game of Risk...ya know, for the kids" (he's of course talking about himself in this case)
Me: "I really wish we could Ivan, but I don't think its a good idea"

Not that I even know if Matt would want to be friends with me. I mean I'm sure he wouldn't dislike the idea...we were real close...I still think about him a lot. I do think its best that we broke up and that for whatever reasons, its really a better idea that we weren't together in that sort of relationship...however, unlike the rest of my old boyfriends, I really had a ridiculous connection to Matt...We were best friends, I can't deny that. Stuff still happens and I still want to call him up and be like "GUESS WHAT!" I miss that, I really do...but at the same time, I know hanging out with him would just be a backwards step for me. I'm really happy with Howie, and I don't want to endanger that relationship, our relationship is growing at such a ridiculous pace...we really click...And I don't want confused feelings of anger/hurt/disappointment/love or whatever would come up to fuck with anything in my near perfect life right now.

Its really aggrivating. Anyway, I had a dream about Matt...not my first mind you, but this one seemed to hit me the hardest. I don't remember everything about it, but the important part. We were sitting , having a conversation and Matt was saying how he doesn't want to have a relationship with anyone right now, he wants to just be single and live a single life...not even date, but he wants me to be his friend. And somehow we ended up being friends and everything worked out perfect. I had my wonderful relationship with Howie, and still kept a friendship with Matt..played games, discussed Survivor, no weird feelings, no jealousy over other girls who could fill that gap that I somehow couldn't...

I woke up happy until it hit me it was a dream, then I was really really sad...nothing I could do about it I guess...I'm not ready, and I don't know when I will be.
Oh matt I wish you were just gay, that would make life easier :) hahaha

anyway enough of my sob story thats so undeserved.

Clay's album is released tonight at midnight and i'm going to pee myself from excitement!

This is a semi-lengthy commentary on a show i saw on Friday for Emma's birthday.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY EMMA!

It was titled "Miss Coney Island Burlesque Beauty Pagent"

And it was ....entertaining.
I suggest if you have time to read it

Coney Island is shkeevy to say the least....Last Years winner greeted us outside in a thong/fishnet dress (bra-less) and a crown/sash.

She took pictures and was grabbed with..all with a smile.

The show had 9 contestants....8 girls, 1 boy (dragqueen). They had 3 portions to the conest. evening wear, talent, and bathing suit.

i'll try to quickly discuss the talents.

1) dressed as a clown this female stripped, and used horns inbetween her but and vagina and honked the horns with her muscles..she also pulled a really long colored tissue thing out of her butt....

2) (my favorite) stripped while also doing complex hula-hoop tricks..the hula hoop would move up and down as she got down to nipple tassels and a thong

3) dragqueen stripped to a song sung by judy garland about NY...his/her outfit included pieces of the village voice and a I love NY tshirt (stuffed with apples)...his gstring was a postcard of the empire state building that covered his thing...not that he kept it on ....

4) Another favorite, this girl did tumbling while balancing a glass of water on her head/legs...she was also stripping while tumbling

5) most F*D up strip..this girl came out naked except a corset that covered her stomach...it was pitch black and she used a red light to show parts of her body at a time..2 minutes later the music got quicker she drank a flask of water..popped a blood pellet in her mouth and then took a dull knife out of her corset and began stabbing herself (in an extreemly realistic way) blood skirted everywhere...she then took the knife and slid it back and forth along her vag/clit. NASTY..almost threw up i swear

INTERMISSION

6) next a boring girl (although anything is boring after that last act) stripped

7) a huge fat african american girl strips and jiggles...one of her nipple tassels lost its tassel

8) a woman who does the least stripping does a very entertaining rope/acrobatic act...she is extremely flexible

9) last girl dressed up in red white and blue w/ a sailor hat strips and girates and shows us how much of her fist she can fit down her throat

After this all the contestants come out so we can vote...the dragqueen tackles a bunch of the girls (he's wearing amermaid bottom) penis and boobies everywhere

Acrobat woman is the winner, all the girls and guy poor cheap champagne on her as she flashes her nipple tassels, and then last years winner and the new winner make out in the tub of champagne.

The end.

PS: last years winner's talent was peeing in a cup...