I'm going to make more of an effort in the coming year to be present here. I am restricted on what I can say elsewhere and I've moved away from writing as a result. This also means that station_gwop may very well be making a comeback.

So in the last couple of weeks, the pain has entered new territory. I have either been unable to sleep even though I have been exhausted or when I wake up I wish I could just sleep more. I woke up the other morning feeling like someone had worked over my ribs with an iron bar. That has happened two separate times now. My hands are constantly on the fritz and I get random pains in my forearm. My forearm! Seriously, of all the stupid places to get pain. My knee will sometimes flare so badly without warning that I have a hard time bending it.

Today I have a constant headache and I feel like the base of my head is spasming pain. This is in addition to the other assortment of random pains I get these days. It sucks when I do not even though what triggers it or when it will even trigger. I am missing out on a lot with the girls and it irritates me.

My dear media, you simply cannot have it both ways. Kevin Harris cannot be both a suicide bomber and someone who was a credible threat and was attempting to lure police and paramedics to their deaths.

1.) He refused their aid. Which he was well within his legal right to do. If he was truly trying to lure them to their deaths, wouldn't it have made more sense if he accepted their aid and then detonated the bombs?

Oh but who expects reason from a crazy person...right?

2.) Except there are different levels of crazy. Mr. Harris appeared to fall into the overly paranoid kind of crazy. His own neighbors weren't afraid of him but actually felt sorry for him. One of them would have him over for dinner periodically.

3.) He was pretty upfront about not allowing people into his home. So if the bombs were to protect him (see reasoning with a crazy person line) then he would keep everyone out.

4.) This was not a sudden onset of crazy. He probably would have attempted something ahead of time if he was trying to eliminate the perceived threat. He simply wanted to educate people to what he saw.

And to the idiot who claims that he alerted the proper officials to the menace that was Mr. Harris riding on his bike distributing his pamphlet... just shut up. He didn't look like you and didn't act like you and dropped off a pamphlet of government conspiracies; that makes him odd, not menacing. If his own neighbors weren't freaked by him (and they were exposed to far more of his crazy) then perhaps you need to go back to mommy because the world is too scary for you.

Dear Colleague;

I told you two days ago that one of our team members would probably be taking PTO to handle some personal things that had arisen. That I had already spoken to her and RECOMMENDED that she do so in order to handle the issues.
She called out yesterday and we adjusted the schedule accordingly.
She called out today for the rest of the week.
You adjust the schedule accordingly and then flip out via email to me about it and another Level 2 team member.
I told you to take it up with HR if you had issues with her PTO and wanted to know how much she had left. I didn't know the answers to your many questions and logic dictated I send you to the people who could help you.
The other team member (your boyfriend) took exception to my response because I didn't address the thin coverage in my response. Which you never mentioned.
I have now pointed out the following points to the both of you:
1.) I told her to take the time off if she needed it.
2.) I do not know the PTO policy and I shouldn't have to know what each team member's PTO actually is. That is their responsibility.
3.) The thin coverage is moot since it will be like this one the team member goes on maternity leave.
4.) Harping about thin coverage but being picky about who you want to hire will send contradictory messages. I'm looking for quality people and if you just want a warm body to fill a seat, I could switch and get you that.

What I wish I could say:
1.) I get that the two of you are fucking. I don't care. Get over yourselves.
2.) I will address the facts and not the emotion. If you want someone to wipe your tears and pat you on the shoulder call your mothers or a therapist. I don't have time for that shit.
3.) You both were willing to grant PTO during a team member's two week notice period even though that is very against policy. Why the hell do you care now about PTO?

To the writers on my list... do you have any communities in lj that you are members off for authors/writers?

So things are moving fast within the job. I've gotten clues from my former boss what is going on and today I was instructed to vet some resumes and arrange to conduct interviews without my counterparts.

Just a little nervous because now I feel like I'm being tested and I really don't want to screw it up. I've conducted interviews before but never as a solo operation. Thoughts and suggestions are appreciated.

So I have a new member to the la mandi train. She's good people and needs some good people to surround herself with on lj since she's new.

Please consider adding blankslate_2010. She comes highly recommended.

So to recap my day:

I bitched about people not actually reading installation guides. They tell me they do but la mandi knows they didn't.

I bitched because the men around here do not wear pants that fit. Baggy is not a style. Baggy makes me want to punch you when you attempt to take a dive down my front or walk into something staring at my ass. You want to continue to enjoy your window shopping? Give me some in return jackasses.

I was impressed at an older gentleman who gave me a nod and a smile as he passed me. Almost made me blush because it was so courtly. Take a note... that's cool.

I listen to Fox News just to see what new dumbass shit they'll say today to introduce the news.

I've been rage induced by hearing about the social Safeway that was rebuilt and reopened in Georgetown. Yes it's a social grocery store. I'm going to have to say google it because if I continue talking about it I'm going to take Metro to it and vandalize the damn place.

Y'know I thought boobquake was a joke.

I rather hoped it was. Surely, we can't seriously be thinking this will actually prove anything to anyone.

Apparently people either did or were looking for a political reason to flash cleavage on the job.

There is simply nothing I could say that won't be scathing at this point.

So I've been quiet lately. Spending alot of time on Facebook games so that I don't actually have to think about anything except dominating that particular game. The domination thing seems to be working so far. Things have been happening in RL and I just needed to unwind from it.

***Commencing brain dump***

There has been talk at work about me potentially moving into a position with more responsibility. I'm hesitant for quite a few reasons although if offered I would take it. I don't back down from challenges.

1.) I'm the new kid on the block with this team. Yes it's been almost a year now but 3 mos of that I was on leave. I'm sure there will be backlash and a view of favoritism.

2.) Machinations and more machinations. My former supervisor in the department wants me to take on this new role because he thinks I can do it and to further his views of how he thinks the dept should run. The current boss wants me to take on this role because he believes I can do it but also to further his views on how he thinks the dept should run. At this stage I do not know the viewpoints oppose or not and it's all very hush hush so no one knows that the other one is talking to me.

3.) It's a management position and damnit, I walked away from my last one for a reason. Yes this one probably won't be quite as HR filled... actually it may very well be. *sigh*

4.) I don't know if I can do it and do it well. This is my biggest hang up right now. I can handle the politics but apparently my self esteems kicks my ass every time. I spoke to one guy at work that I trust to tell it to me straight no matter what. He did and I feel a bit better about it. Not a whole lot but a little bit.

Ultimately I'll still take it, it just scares me a bit.

***Ends brain dump***

Maybe when it's all over I'll start posting a bit more.