Supernatural: Extracurricular Activities (Jensen/Colin Ford AU, NC-17) 15/?
Title: Extracurricular Activities
Pairing: Supernatural RPS, Jensen/Colin Ford (with past J2)
Rating: Overall NC-17
Disclaimer: The only thing I own is my filthy thoughts
Warnings/kinks: UNDERAGE (Colin is 15 in this fic), age difference, student/teacher relationship
Summary: Six months ago Jensen made the decision to make a new start after a bad break up, and now he finds himself not in his native Texas, but in Nashville, Tennessee, completely alone for the first time in his life. He’s the new English teacher at school where he meets Colin, the kid who makes an impression on him in more ways than one! ;)
A/N: Time for angst because I need it like air. I'm not all that happy with this chapter, honestly, so apologies if it's a bit all over the place.
A visual aid for the chapter. My poor baby! :(
“Fuck, shit!” Jensen hisses, pushing Colin off his lap, “What’s she doing home already?” His heart is pounding now from panic and not lust. He swallows and takes a deep breath to try and fight the sudden feeling that he’s about to throw up.
“How the fuck should I know?” Colin snaps, scrambling towards the end of the couch and grabbing a cushion to cover his crotch.
Jensen picks up Colin’s almost empty coffee mug off the table and takes a mouthful of the lukewarm liquid, just about hiding a grimace as Kim walks through the door. It does nothing for the rising bile trying to escape from his stomach but it’s the only think he can think of to make him look not guilty of something.
“Colin, didn’t you hear me shouting? I got away early. Whose car is that in the driveway?” she comes into the room, brushing snow out of her hair before looking up, “Oh, Jensen, er...hi,” she looks between them with a small frown, “What’s going on?”
Jensen swallows again and plasters on his best teacher smile, hoping to all hell that he doesn’t look as flushed - or panicked - as he feels, “Hi Kim...er, it’s nothing to worry about, it’s just that…” words fail him, he has absolutely no idea how to finish that sentence.
“A book,” Colin blurts out and Jensen breathes a small sigh of relief that one of them has blood getting to their upstairs brains, “I forgot to take it… needed back today, er, Mr. Ackles…Helen... she, er...” there’s more than a slight shake in his voice but he continues, “homework...”
Kim looks at him and blinks, turning to Jensen with what he thinks - hopes! - is a vaguely amused look, “Could I have that in English with less babbling?”
Laughing more out of nerves than anything, Jensen takes a slow breath in through his nose and speaks as steadily as he can, “I think the stress of the exams have got to him! I loaned Colin a book as part of his extra studies which he was supposed to return so I could pass it on to another one of my students, Helen, so she could complete the extra homework I set for the holidays. I was in the area… I would have called but I don’t have your number to hand. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have just turned up.” Please let that be convincing! he prays.
“No problem,” she says, seemingly satisfied with his performance, “can I get you another coffee?”
“I’m good, thank you,” he shuffles forward on the couch, reaching for his bag before turning to Colin, “if you could just grab the book,” he’s staring at the teen and willing him to catch on, “I can get out of your way.”
“Sure,” the kid says, eyes darting between the two adults before he stands, backing away in the direction of the stairs “be right back.”
Jensen swallows, nervously, not wanting to turn back to Colin’s mom but knowing he has to. She’s watching the doorway the teen just went through, shaking her head.
“He’d forget his head if it wasn’t attached, that one!” she laughs.
“Teenagers,” he replies, “they’re a species all of their own.”
“You got that right,” she replies, smiling at the space where Colin was, “there are some good ones, though.”
Jensen feels some of his panic dissipate with her laugh but his stomach shaky for another reason, now, “Yeah,” he says softly, knowing he’s got a smile on his face but not able to hide it, “there really are.”
Colin feels sick, his stomach churns as he walks in circles around his bedroom, “Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he chants as he moves, trying to get himself under control. He sits on the edge of the bed when he starts feeling lightheaded, taking calming breaths as best he can. When he feels his heart rate becoming somewhat regular he looks around the room, eyes flitting from book to book on his computer desk and the small shelf in the corner. Worried about taking too long and arousing more suspicion, he grabs the one from by his bed, slips it out of the dusk jacket to reveal a plain hard cover and hopes it will pass for a school book.
He takes the stairs slowly and listens hard for noises below. There’s no shouting or screaming, no slam of doors or sounds of anyone being punched so it takes that as a good sign. When he reaches the living room his mom and Jensen are laughing and his lover has a smile on his face. He can’t help the stab of jealousy he feels at that, he should be the only one to do that. His breathing speeds up as anger takes hold and he has to dig his fingernails into his thigh to calm himself down, “I found it,” he calls out with false cheer, “what’s so funny?” he asks, unable to help himself.
His mom frowns at him and smile slips from Jensen’s face, making Colin feel like shit because he never wants to be the cause of that.
The teacher clears his throat, stands and picks his bag up, “Thanks,” he says, holding a hand out and Colin is momentarily confused until he realises Jensen is waiting for him to hand over the book.
“Er...yeah,” the teen stammers, “thanks for the loan, Mr. Ackles.”
“You’re welcome, Colin, I’ll see you in school,” he says, turning away without another look.
The teen watches as his mom starts walking Jensen to the door. He wants to run out and get a goodbye from the man in case they don’t get a moment alone tomorrow, but before his brain can make his feet move, he hears the front door close and Jensen’s car backing out of the driveway.
“Have you had some…” his mom starts as she comes back in the room, stopping mid sentence as she takes in his expression. The teens tries his best to act normal even though his chest aches. He must manage it to some extent as she carries on talking with only a small frown, “dinner? There’s leftover lasagne in the fridge, shall I heat you some up?”
“No thanks, not hungry” he mutters, “‘m pretty tired, think I’ll just have an early night.”
“Are you coming down with something?” she asks as she walks towards him, sighing when he dodges the hand she raises to check his temperature, “Shout me if you need anything.”
Back in the sanctuary of his room he taps out a message to Jensen.
CF: Shit, that was close! Are you OK?
He waits twenty minutes to give Jensen time to get home, allowing a little extra time for the road conditions before sending another.
CF: Didn’t even get to give you your present!
Forty five minutes later and still no reply despite the ticks turning blue to show Jensen had read the message. Another hour and Colin’s ready to tear his hair out.
CF: Are you mad at me?
Jensen takes a long sip on his glass of bourbon, the burn of it a welcome change from the bile he’s been trying to keep from making its way out of his system since he left the Ford house. He looks at Colin’s messages, the words blurring on the screen as he finishes his third glass of whiskey. He types various responses out, deleting each of them until he eventually settles on one.
JA: It was TOO close. FFS, I’m mad at both of us & you should be, too!
Colin’s reply is almost instantaneous.
Dobby: What can I do?
Jensen can almost hear the desperation in the question and he snorts, stabbing the screen as he pours another drink.
JA: Nothing. Go to bed.
He types out more and his thumb hovers over the send button. He empties the glass in one swallow, wipes the tear running down his cheek and turns his phone off. Even as the screen fades to black he can see the words behind his eyelids. Forget about me.
Colin doesn’t think he slept more than an hour last night and he feels like shit, not just from tiredness but worry as well. Jensen hasn’t been that direct in messages since … well he’s not sure it’s ever been the case. The teen had followed up the instruction to go to bed with several other messages, none of which have been read even though it’s 10am. Jensen has also changed his settings so it doesn’t show when he was last online and for some reason that feels more like a rejection than anything else, the man’s actively avoiding him. When the teen got to school he’d taken a detour to walk past Jensen’s classroom to make sure he’s there, which he is, making him feel both better and worse. He’s relieved that Jensen’s OK, or physically present, at least. It makes Colin feel sick all over again - if he could just get five minutes with the man he could apologise, for what exactly he’s not sure, but it seems like the right thing to do under the circumstances.
His final exam is Arts Education and he stares blankly at the questions in front of him, not knowing or caring what the answers are. The adjudicator tells the room they have thirty minutes left when Colin finally picks up his pencil. He scribbles any old crap in the required boxes and randomly marks the multiple choice questions, the final minutes ticking by agonisingly slowly until finally papers are collected and the bell rings signalling that Winter break has officially started. Colin tears out of the classroom so fast he nearly takes out two other kids on his way past, mumbling apologies they won’t hear because he’s already out in the hall and heading in the direction of Jensen’s room.
Suddenly he stops, the reality dawning that he can’t just run in there no matter how much he wants to. He has no logical reason to be there, it will look odd that he’s running into a classroom as all the other kids are rushing to get out as fast as possible. He takes a couple of deep breaths and heads into the nearest bathroom. He ducks into the end stall, slamming the door as he hears other kids coming in behind in, talking and laughing, discussing plans for their holidays and Christmas day with the extended family that’s always like pulling teeth.
He feels a cold sweat break out over his body as the realisation hits that if he doesn’t get to see Jensen now, it’ll be at least a week, probably more before the man is back from Dallas and he can’t stand it. He doesn’t even know for sure how long Jensen will be gone. He should know that, God damn it! He wrenches open the door, startling the other kids in the process, washes his hands and splashes water on his face while he tries to calm down. It works, barely, and he sets out to speak to his lover, no matter what.
Jensen rubs his temples in the vain hope that the throb there would ease - it doesn’t, of course, he’s too strung out, his blood pressure way too high all over again. He smiles as best as he can and returns the holiday greetings the kids throw his way as they’re leaving, feeling a hollow pit in his stomach. The thought of travelling home, the pain in the ass flights and the first class acting job he knows he’ll have to try and pull off to fool his family into believing everything is good fills him with dread. He lets out a long sigh and starts collecting his things, ready to head out after the obligatory goodbyes to whoever’s in the teacher’s lounge. He almost makes it to the door of his classroom before Colin steps through it, backpack in hand, face pale and the saddest eyes Jensen’s seen on a human being in a long time. The sight makes Jensen’s stomach clench.
“Hey,” the teen says, “can we talk?” his voice is quiet and shaky, possibly even scared of the answer, he thinks.
Jensen grips the handle of his handle of his travel mug tighter, “I don’t think that’s a good idea,” he says, trying to keep his tone as neutral as possible. He avoids looking at Colin in favour of opening his bag, slotting the mug into it and reaching for his scarf and coat from the stand behind the door.
“Jensen, please!”
The anguish in those two words makes the older man falter and he grips the handle of the open door to steady himself a little, “Colin,” he says, his tone direct, the one he uses to let the kids know he’s not impressed with them dicking around in class, “I said no!” The teen doesn’t say anything and Jensen can’t bring himself to look, he knows if he does his resolve will break. This is for the best, he’s spent the night telling himself, this way they can’t get hurt if it doesn’t go any further. He puts on his scarf and coat as slowly as he can but eventually he has to turn to face the teen.
As soon as their eyes meet Colin speaks, “You’re mad, I get it,” he snaps, taking the older man by surprise a little, “but why are you ignoring me? What the fuck did I do that was so wrong? Tell me that!”
Jensen feels the anger building up inside him and tries to keep a lid on it. He glances down the corridor, sees that it’s empty and against his better judgement turns and walks to the storeroom. He can hear Colin’s footsteps right behind him and as soon as they’re through the door the teen slams it shut behind them.
“For fuck’s sake, be quiet!” Jensen almost growls, watching the door rattle in its frame.
“Fuck the door!” Colin spits, barely contained anger in his tone. When Jensen turns to look at him he sees that the teen is practically vibrating with tension, “Why are you being like this, Jen?”
The older man sees red, his temples throbbing in time with the thundering in his chest. He steps forward and grabs Colin by his upper arms and shakes him once, “You don’t get it, do you? We were almost caught, Colin! We were beyond reckless, we should have known better… hell, I do know better, that’s what makes it worse. This is so fucked up,” he abruptly releases the teen who stumbles a little, “I can’t…we can’t...” he’s searching for the right words but they’re not coming.
“So that’s it?” Colin says, “just like that you don’t...,” he takes a sharp breath in through his nose, clearly steeling himself to say the words, “you don’t want me anymore?”
It feels like he’s been punched in the gut and Jensen lets out a noise that sounds like he actually has been. She shakes his head in disbelief, taking a couple of steps back from the teen. His head is buzzing, he wants to scream and cry and wants Colin to just understand so he doesn’t have to say it out loud. He opens his mouth twice but still can’t get out what he wants to, it’s too hard and it hurts enough without saying it.
“Fine,” Colin spits out, “maybe I do get it,” his breath is hitching, tears in his eyes, “you’re only interested when it’s easy. I thought I meant more to you than that, you bastard!”
The hurt on his face is so raw that Jensen feels physical pain at the sight of it and his breath catches, stuck around the lump in his throat. He stands still, feeling like he’s been slapped in the face until Colin turns away and reaches for the door. Then Jensen moves, he’s reaching a hand to the teen’s shoulder, gripping it hard to stop him in his tracks. He takes a step closer, wanting to turn his lover back around but he doesn’t think he can look at him right now. He lifts his other hand to Colin’s other shoulder and moves closer, dropping his forehead to rest on the top of the teen’s head and sighs, “You have absolutely no idea, do you?” his voice is raspy like he’s swallowing around something sharp.
Colin tenses again, moving forward and spinning around at the same time so that Jensen’s left standing there, off balance, as usual when it comes to the teen, “About you? Relationships? No, Jensen, I don’t, it’s obvious that I don’t have a fucking clue!” he says, his voice breaking, on the verge of tears, now.
Jensen can’t help the huff of laughter than escapes his mouth, with it some of the tension he’s holding onto, “How can someone as smart as you be so fucking stupid, Colin?”
The teen frowns in confusion and a tear slips down one side of his face, “Don’t you dare call me stupid,” he sounds angier, now, though he’s never looked more vulnerable, “this is all new to me, Jen, how the fuck am I supposed to know what that even means if you don’t tell me?”
Jensen swallows at the stark reminder that despite his maturity that Colin is still only fifteen, he really does have no clue what relationships and fights are about. “I’m not saying you’re stupid,” he sighs, “maybe clueless is a better word, naive, definitely.”
“Doesn’t sound much better!” Colin snaps.
Jensen presses his fingers to the bridge of his nose in frustration, sighing again before he opens his eyes and looks directly into the teen’s, “I’m trying to protect you, here, Colin. Do you understand what would happen if we got caught? Properly understand, I mean? The whole ramifications of us having a relationship?”
Colin nods, “You could lose your job.”
“It’s not just that,” he puts a hand on Colin’s shoulder again, using the other to grasp his chin so the teen can’t look away, “I’d never be able to work as a teacher again. I could be charged with statutory rape if anyone found out,” his stomach twists but he knows he has to say it, “you could press charges if you wanted to.”
The look on Colin’s face is that of a kicked puppy, “I’d never… you really think I’d do that?” he whispers, another tear streaming down his cheek and onto Jensen’s thumb, “Why would you think that?”
Jensen moves his hand from Colin’s shoulder to cup his cheek, brushing away more tears where they’re flowing freely, now, “No, baby, I don’t think that… what I’m saying is that you could and I guess if I was a decent guy I’d be telling you to do it. I should walk away and tell you to find someone your own age, but...” he swallows around the lump in his throat.
Colin lets out a small sob, gripping Jensen’s wrist, “You are a decent guy, Jen,” frowning at the snort Jensen lets out, “but… what?”
“Huh?” Jensen asks, his head swimming, not following Colin’s train of thought.
“You said ‘should’ and ‘but’ … does that mean... you hate me...” he leaves it open and the look on his beautiful face is a combination of hope and uncertainty, as if he’s steeling himself for his world is about to come crashing down.
The older man blinks is disbelief, “Jesus, Colin, hate you?”, he moves the hand that was holding the teen’s chin and lays it over his chest, feeling the thump of his heartbeat underneath. He takes a deep breath and looks more intently into Colin’s eyes, “I got mad at us for being impulsive yet again… I got mad because no matter how hard I try I can’t seem to control myself around you because you make me so fucking crazy, and you think…” he struggles to take a breath between all the words falling out of his mouth, “you think I hate you?”
Colin’s frown deepens, “But you ignored me and pushed me away, I thought you wouldn’t want me because I wasn’t careful enough....”
Jensen growls and slides his hand from Colin’s chest to his upper arm again, gripping tightly and pulling him closer, “I fucking love you, you idiot!” he slams his lips into Colin’s, hearing a sharp intake of breath. He pulls away, looking at the teen’s face, “I shouldn’t love you, I know that. I’m risking everything but…God damn it!,” all his good intentions go out of the window as he leans in again, less forceful this time, Colin returning the kiss. Jensen wants to lose himself in it but he pulls away to prove his own point, “We have to be much more cautious, no more stupid risks. We have to … I have to show some restraint, I’m the…” he wants to say adult but knows that will only make it worse, “I’m the more experienced one. We can do this, but we have to make a plan and stick to it, OK?”
Colin is smiling through his tears, nodding his head so hard that his perfectly styled hair is shaking lose, “I love you, too, Jen, so fucking much,” he says before he flings his arms around the older man and holds on tight.
Jensen holds back just as tight, kissing the top of Colin’s head, butterflies in his stomach flapping like crazy, “We’re gonna be OK,” he says, over and over, hoping against hope he’s telling the truth.
It’s eight days since they last saw each other and Colin misses Jensen more than he thought it was possible to miss another person, but he’s barely stopped smiling through it. He’s been teased and grilled, especially by his mom and Elle, who’s surprised him by just shrugging and accepting it when he said he was dating a guy, but he’s remained strong in the face of their nagging. He’s not snapped at their taunts, nor has he given out more than basic information about ‘Cedric’. He’s had to tell them something, so he’s sticking with it being someone from school, someone older and fairly new to the area and most importantly, no, they don’t know him. He’s hinted that Cedric lives a little further out of town so that it gives him an excuse to spend longer out on his ‘dates’ with him.
He has of course run all this by Jensen, who’s agreed it’s for the best. In the New Year Colin and Cedric will go on their first official date, and when the time is right the family will get to meet him. They’re going to have to come up with some break up story somewhere down the line but for now people seem to be buying it. Elle is doing her best to catch Colin out, but he knows her too well so her tactics aren’t working. For now he just has to make it another few days before Jensen’s home from Dallas and then they can finally be together again.
“Honey, are you going to get off your phone at any point today?” his mom huffs, putting another two baking trays in the oven, “I could use a hand, here.”
CF: Mom’s hassling me for help. So much party food around here it looks like we’re catering the whole street not a family party!
Cedric: Do it, man, a pissed off mom is not to be messed with. I’d forgotten how true that is. I’m hiding in my room pretending to have a nap just to get time to myself! #sorrynotsorry
CF: Still driving you mad?
Cedric: It’s what moms do. It’s been great spending time here but I’m ready to come home to you, now. Just one more night of plastering on fake smiles for old family friends before it’s just mom, dad, me, my brother & sister. Then back to the peace & quiet & time for us. Can’t wait!
A warm heat spreads across the teen’s chest at the ‘home to you’ part of Jensen’s message until he hears a clatter from the kitchen, “Mom?” he shouts, “You alive in there?”
“Shit! Some help, please, now!” she calls, tone leaving no room for argument.
CF: I have faith in you, you can make it! Gotta go before mom breaks the kitchen. Call me later?
Cedric: As long as I can get away I will. Love you x
CF: I don’t care what time, wake me up. Love you too <3
In the chaos of food preparation, the party itself and getting his mom home after a couple of glasses of champagne too many it’s past 1am before Colin even gets the chance to check his phone and sees the battery is dead. It’s been a while since he enjoyed a family party but he’s been in such a good mood he went with the flow, playing games with the younger kids, hanging with Elle and Rachel. He’s always liked Rachel, she treats him like an equal, not a kid, and he can see why Jensen gets on with her, too.
He puts his phone on charge, gets ready for bed then climbs under the covers, turning the phone on when it reaches 10% power. Email and text notifications go off and he turns the volume off, his mom is already asleep and he doesn’t want to wake her though it’s unlikely after her alcohol consumption. There are two messages from Jensen and he thumbs them open as soon as the window pops up.
Cedric: How’s the party going?
Cedric: Going to bed early, will call you tomorrow.
Colin frowns, the last message was sent a little after 9pm and something is off about it, he can tell, Jensen never goes to be that early. The older man has called him every night he’s been away after going to bed and it’s been 11pm at the earliest, except his first night there because he was worn out from the end of school, travelling and being overwhelmed by seeing everyone after almost a year.
CF: Phone was dead, sorry. Party was pretty cool. How about yours, everything go OK?
Jensen reads the message almost straight away and Colin smiles, still hoping for a call. The screen changes to ‘Cedric typing’ and the teen waits… and waits and waits. He expects a hell of a long message so is surprised by the short reply.
Cedric: Shitty night. Wish you were here, could do with a hug.
His thumb hovers over the call button but he decides to test the waters instead.
CF: Why what happened? I wish I was there, too. Not long now x
Cedric: Long story, tell you when I get back.
CF: Are you sure? I can call you...
Cedric: Nah not tonight. Get some sleep.
He can’t help but feel disappointed, something’s bothering Jensen and Colin wants to help but he can’t until he knows what it is. The fact that the man is outright refusing to talk about what made the night shitty bothers him…he wants to push it, call Jensen anyway and see what he can get out of him but he knows it’s selfish. He’s trying to look at things with a more mature attitude, now, he wants to show Jensen that he can handle the responsibility of their relationship but that doesn’t mean it’s easy for him. With a sigh he puts his phone back on his nightstand and falls into an uneasy sleep.
Jensen slams the cab door harder than he intended to and shouts a belated apology to the driver as he’s fishing his house keys out of his pocket. Rachel had agreed to collect him from the airport but he’s flown back two days early and he doesn’t want an inquisition. What he wants is to forget the past fifteen hours or so, a hot shower, to see Colin and sleep in his own bed where he can relax.. As soon as he’s dumped his bag in the bedroom he sits on the bed and pulls his phone and sends the message he’s had in his drafts for three hours.
JA: Good news, kiddo, coming home early.
Dobby: What? Why? When?
He can’t help but smile, it’s typical Colin to bombard him with questions, and that’s why he’s not sent the message before. He really didn’t - doesn’t - want to answer questions right now but he knows he’ll have to and he’d rather not do it over WhatsApp. His first priority is getting time with his boy.
JA: You never ask that many questions at school! LOL
I just got back, really want to see you. Is your mom home?
He looks at his watch and sees it’s only 11am, it won’t be dark for hours yet, and they’d agreed for the time being they’d get together when it was dark out to reduce the risk of anyone seeing them, “Shit!” he curses himself for not waiting until later to send the message.
Dobby: What happened, are you OK? She’s working the night shift, leaves around 7pm.
JA: I’ll be fine once I see you. Can you get away before that?
He knows he’s probably sounding desperate but at this point he doesn’t care.
Dobby: Sure, I’ll tell her I’m going to Elle’s, I’ll leave at 4pm. Where are we going?
Jensen’s weighed the options up already and there’s only one choice, they can’t have this conversation during a ‘casual’ public encounter, he has no idea how Colin’s going to react to what he has to tell him..
JA: Need you here. I’ll pick you up at the back of Benedict’s coffee shop at 4.15?
Dobby: Awesome! :D :D :D
Colin is buzzing with nervous excitement, bouncing on the balls of his feet as he waits in the queue at the coffee shop. He couldn’t stand being in the house so he’d left at 3.20pm it wasn’t dark but it was dull and by the time he’s walked there it was well on the way. He texted Jensen to collect him at 4pm instead and orders them cinnamon rolls and large coffees to go, both black with a couple of pumps of gingerbread spice syrup in because he knows how much Jensen loves it as long as it’s not too overdone. He prefers flavour not sweetness, and Colin wants to taste it off the man’s lips as soon as possible. As soon as the order is ready he messages again.
CF: Ready to go, let me know when you’re on your way.
Cedric: Already here!
He smirks when the reply comes and he notices it’s 3.55pm, they’re obviously as keen as each other.
As soon as Jensen pulls the truck into his garage and the door closes behind them, blocking them from view Colin grabs Jensen’s shoulder and pulls the older man towards him, pressing a desperate kiss to his lips. Jensen kisses him back but is chuckling, “What?” the teen says as he pulls away.
“At least wait until we get inside, can’t you?”
Colin glares at him and climbs out of the truck, coffee and pastries in hand and waits for Jensen to unlock the internal door. Once they’re both in the house he puts his purchases on the kitchen counter, unzips his coat and hangs it over the back of a dining chair. He hears Jensen’s footsteps behind him and feels strong arms snake around his waist and hold tight, pulling the teen’s back against his chest, “Now who’s keen?” Colin teases as he turns in Jensen’s embrace.
He looks up and sees a frown darkening the man’s features. He reaches up to Jensen’s cheek and brushes a thumb over his cheek before leaning in to kiss him again, softer this time but still passionate. Jensen holds tighter and kisses him harshly, clinging onto him with desperation, but something’s not right, “What’s going on?” he asks softly when he breaks the kiss. Jensen opens his eyes and they’re pained, making Colin immediately worried.
“I just missed you,” he says, leaning forward to bury his face in Colin’s neck. The teen holds him tight when he feels the older man’s breathing hitch, “I hated being without you.”
As happy as Colin would normally be to have Jensen in his arms, he pulls away, lacing their fingers together and leading the older man to the couch. He brings their joined hands into his lap and cups Jensen’s jaw, “What’s happened, Jen?” He can see several emotions crossing the older man’s face before he speaks and it’s not helping Colin’s suddenly rising nerves.
“It’s nothing, really,” he says then winces a little as the teen raises an eyebrow, not buying it for a second, “OK, well it shouldn’t be a big deal but I had to get out of there, I had to get away from him.”
“From who?” Colin asks, wondering if there’s a part of the conversation he’s totally missed.
Jensen squeezes his hand, “My ex, Jared.
Chapter 16
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Pairing: Supernatural RPS, Jensen/Colin Ford (with past J2)
Rating: Overall NC-17
Disclaimer: The only thing I own is my filthy thoughts
Warnings/kinks: UNDERAGE (Colin is 15 in this fic), age difference, student/teacher relationship
Summary: Six months ago Jensen made the decision to make a new start after a bad break up, and now he finds himself not in his native Texas, but in Nashville, Tennessee, completely alone for the first time in his life. He’s the new English teacher at school where he meets Colin, the kid who makes an impression on him in more ways than one! ;)
A/N: Time for angst because I need it like air. I'm not all that happy with this chapter, honestly, so apologies if it's a bit all over the place.
A visual aid for the chapter. My poor baby! :(
“Fuck, shit!” Jensen hisses, pushing Colin off his lap, “What’s she doing home already?” His heart is pounding now from panic and not lust. He swallows and takes a deep breath to try and fight the sudden feeling that he’s about to throw up.
“How the fuck should I know?” Colin snaps, scrambling towards the end of the couch and grabbing a cushion to cover his crotch.
Jensen picks up Colin’s almost empty coffee mug off the table and takes a mouthful of the lukewarm liquid, just about hiding a grimace as Kim walks through the door. It does nothing for the rising bile trying to escape from his stomach but it’s the only think he can think of to make him look not guilty of something.
“Colin, didn’t you hear me shouting? I got away early. Whose car is that in the driveway?” she comes into the room, brushing snow out of her hair before looking up, “Oh, Jensen, er...hi,” she looks between them with a small frown, “What’s going on?”
Jensen swallows again and plasters on his best teacher smile, hoping to all hell that he doesn’t look as flushed - or panicked - as he feels, “Hi Kim...er, it’s nothing to worry about, it’s just that…” words fail him, he has absolutely no idea how to finish that sentence.
“A book,” Colin blurts out and Jensen breathes a small sigh of relief that one of them has blood getting to their upstairs brains, “I forgot to take it… needed back today, er, Mr. Ackles…Helen... she, er...” there’s more than a slight shake in his voice but he continues, “homework...”
Kim looks at him and blinks, turning to Jensen with what he thinks - hopes! - is a vaguely amused look, “Could I have that in English with less babbling?”
Laughing more out of nerves than anything, Jensen takes a slow breath in through his nose and speaks as steadily as he can, “I think the stress of the exams have got to him! I loaned Colin a book as part of his extra studies which he was supposed to return so I could pass it on to another one of my students, Helen, so she could complete the extra homework I set for the holidays. I was in the area… I would have called but I don’t have your number to hand. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have just turned up.” Please let that be convincing! he prays.
“No problem,” she says, seemingly satisfied with his performance, “can I get you another coffee?”
“I’m good, thank you,” he shuffles forward on the couch, reaching for his bag before turning to Colin, “if you could just grab the book,” he’s staring at the teen and willing him to catch on, “I can get out of your way.”
“Sure,” the kid says, eyes darting between the two adults before he stands, backing away in the direction of the stairs “be right back.”
Jensen swallows, nervously, not wanting to turn back to Colin’s mom but knowing he has to. She’s watching the doorway the teen just went through, shaking her head.
“He’d forget his head if it wasn’t attached, that one!” she laughs.
“Teenagers,” he replies, “they’re a species all of their own.”
“You got that right,” she replies, smiling at the space where Colin was, “there are some good ones, though.”
Jensen feels some of his panic dissipate with her laugh but his stomach shaky for another reason, now, “Yeah,” he says softly, knowing he’s got a smile on his face but not able to hide it, “there really are.”
§
Colin feels sick, his stomach churns as he walks in circles around his bedroom, “Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he chants as he moves, trying to get himself under control. He sits on the edge of the bed when he starts feeling lightheaded, taking calming breaths as best he can. When he feels his heart rate becoming somewhat regular he looks around the room, eyes flitting from book to book on his computer desk and the small shelf in the corner. Worried about taking too long and arousing more suspicion, he grabs the one from by his bed, slips it out of the dusk jacket to reveal a plain hard cover and hopes it will pass for a school book.
He takes the stairs slowly and listens hard for noises below. There’s no shouting or screaming, no slam of doors or sounds of anyone being punched so it takes that as a good sign. When he reaches the living room his mom and Jensen are laughing and his lover has a smile on his face. He can’t help the stab of jealousy he feels at that, he should be the only one to do that. His breathing speeds up as anger takes hold and he has to dig his fingernails into his thigh to calm himself down, “I found it,” he calls out with false cheer, “what’s so funny?” he asks, unable to help himself.
His mom frowns at him and smile slips from Jensen’s face, making Colin feel like shit because he never wants to be the cause of that.
The teacher clears his throat, stands and picks his bag up, “Thanks,” he says, holding a hand out and Colin is momentarily confused until he realises Jensen is waiting for him to hand over the book.
“Er...yeah,” the teen stammers, “thanks for the loan, Mr. Ackles.”
“You’re welcome, Colin, I’ll see you in school,” he says, turning away without another look.
The teen watches as his mom starts walking Jensen to the door. He wants to run out and get a goodbye from the man in case they don’t get a moment alone tomorrow, but before his brain can make his feet move, he hears the front door close and Jensen’s car backing out of the driveway.
“Have you had some…” his mom starts as she comes back in the room, stopping mid sentence as she takes in his expression. The teens tries his best to act normal even though his chest aches. He must manage it to some extent as she carries on talking with only a small frown, “dinner? There’s leftover lasagne in the fridge, shall I heat you some up?”
“No thanks, not hungry” he mutters, “‘m pretty tired, think I’ll just have an early night.”
“Are you coming down with something?” she asks as she walks towards him, sighing when he dodges the hand she raises to check his temperature, “Shout me if you need anything.”
Back in the sanctuary of his room he taps out a message to Jensen.
CF: Shit, that was close! Are you OK?
He waits twenty minutes to give Jensen time to get home, allowing a little extra time for the road conditions before sending another.
CF: Didn’t even get to give you your present!
Forty five minutes later and still no reply despite the ticks turning blue to show Jensen had read the message. Another hour and Colin’s ready to tear his hair out.
CF: Are you mad at me?
§
Jensen takes a long sip on his glass of bourbon, the burn of it a welcome change from the bile he’s been trying to keep from making its way out of his system since he left the Ford house. He looks at Colin’s messages, the words blurring on the screen as he finishes his third glass of whiskey. He types various responses out, deleting each of them until he eventually settles on one.
JA: It was TOO close. FFS, I’m mad at both of us & you should be, too!
Colin’s reply is almost instantaneous.
Dobby: What can I do?
Jensen can almost hear the desperation in the question and he snorts, stabbing the screen as he pours another drink.
JA: Nothing. Go to bed.
He types out more and his thumb hovers over the send button. He empties the glass in one swallow, wipes the tear running down his cheek and turns his phone off. Even as the screen fades to black he can see the words behind his eyelids. Forget about me.
§
Colin doesn’t think he slept more than an hour last night and he feels like shit, not just from tiredness but worry as well. Jensen hasn’t been that direct in messages since … well he’s not sure it’s ever been the case. The teen had followed up the instruction to go to bed with several other messages, none of which have been read even though it’s 10am. Jensen has also changed his settings so it doesn’t show when he was last online and for some reason that feels more like a rejection than anything else, the man’s actively avoiding him. When the teen got to school he’d taken a detour to walk past Jensen’s classroom to make sure he’s there, which he is, making him feel both better and worse. He’s relieved that Jensen’s OK, or physically present, at least. It makes Colin feel sick all over again - if he could just get five minutes with the man he could apologise, for what exactly he’s not sure, but it seems like the right thing to do under the circumstances.
His final exam is Arts Education and he stares blankly at the questions in front of him, not knowing or caring what the answers are. The adjudicator tells the room they have thirty minutes left when Colin finally picks up his pencil. He scribbles any old crap in the required boxes and randomly marks the multiple choice questions, the final minutes ticking by agonisingly slowly until finally papers are collected and the bell rings signalling that Winter break has officially started. Colin tears out of the classroom so fast he nearly takes out two other kids on his way past, mumbling apologies they won’t hear because he’s already out in the hall and heading in the direction of Jensen’s room.
Suddenly he stops, the reality dawning that he can’t just run in there no matter how much he wants to. He has no logical reason to be there, it will look odd that he’s running into a classroom as all the other kids are rushing to get out as fast as possible. He takes a couple of deep breaths and heads into the nearest bathroom. He ducks into the end stall, slamming the door as he hears other kids coming in behind in, talking and laughing, discussing plans for their holidays and Christmas day with the extended family that’s always like pulling teeth.
He feels a cold sweat break out over his body as the realisation hits that if he doesn’t get to see Jensen now, it’ll be at least a week, probably more before the man is back from Dallas and he can’t stand it. He doesn’t even know for sure how long Jensen will be gone. He should know that, God damn it! He wrenches open the door, startling the other kids in the process, washes his hands and splashes water on his face while he tries to calm down. It works, barely, and he sets out to speak to his lover, no matter what.
§
Jensen rubs his temples in the vain hope that the throb there would ease - it doesn’t, of course, he’s too strung out, his blood pressure way too high all over again. He smiles as best as he can and returns the holiday greetings the kids throw his way as they’re leaving, feeling a hollow pit in his stomach. The thought of travelling home, the pain in the ass flights and the first class acting job he knows he’ll have to try and pull off to fool his family into believing everything is good fills him with dread. He lets out a long sigh and starts collecting his things, ready to head out after the obligatory goodbyes to whoever’s in the teacher’s lounge. He almost makes it to the door of his classroom before Colin steps through it, backpack in hand, face pale and the saddest eyes Jensen’s seen on a human being in a long time. The sight makes Jensen’s stomach clench.
“Hey,” the teen says, “can we talk?” his voice is quiet and shaky, possibly even scared of the answer, he thinks.
Jensen grips the handle of his handle of his travel mug tighter, “I don’t think that’s a good idea,” he says, trying to keep his tone as neutral as possible. He avoids looking at Colin in favour of opening his bag, slotting the mug into it and reaching for his scarf and coat from the stand behind the door.
“Jensen, please!”
The anguish in those two words makes the older man falter and he grips the handle of the open door to steady himself a little, “Colin,” he says, his tone direct, the one he uses to let the kids know he’s not impressed with them dicking around in class, “I said no!” The teen doesn’t say anything and Jensen can’t bring himself to look, he knows if he does his resolve will break. This is for the best, he’s spent the night telling himself, this way they can’t get hurt if it doesn’t go any further. He puts on his scarf and coat as slowly as he can but eventually he has to turn to face the teen.
As soon as their eyes meet Colin speaks, “You’re mad, I get it,” he snaps, taking the older man by surprise a little, “but why are you ignoring me? What the fuck did I do that was so wrong? Tell me that!”
Jensen feels the anger building up inside him and tries to keep a lid on it. He glances down the corridor, sees that it’s empty and against his better judgement turns and walks to the storeroom. He can hear Colin’s footsteps right behind him and as soon as they’re through the door the teen slams it shut behind them.
“For fuck’s sake, be quiet!” Jensen almost growls, watching the door rattle in its frame.
“Fuck the door!” Colin spits, barely contained anger in his tone. When Jensen turns to look at him he sees that the teen is practically vibrating with tension, “Why are you being like this, Jen?”
The older man sees red, his temples throbbing in time with the thundering in his chest. He steps forward and grabs Colin by his upper arms and shakes him once, “You don’t get it, do you? We were almost caught, Colin! We were beyond reckless, we should have known better… hell, I do know better, that’s what makes it worse. This is so fucked up,” he abruptly releases the teen who stumbles a little, “I can’t…we can’t...” he’s searching for the right words but they’re not coming.
“So that’s it?” Colin says, “just like that you don’t...,” he takes a sharp breath in through his nose, clearly steeling himself to say the words, “you don’t want me anymore?”
It feels like he’s been punched in the gut and Jensen lets out a noise that sounds like he actually has been. She shakes his head in disbelief, taking a couple of steps back from the teen. His head is buzzing, he wants to scream and cry and wants Colin to just understand so he doesn’t have to say it out loud. He opens his mouth twice but still can’t get out what he wants to, it’s too hard and it hurts enough without saying it.
“Fine,” Colin spits out, “maybe I do get it,” his breath is hitching, tears in his eyes, “you’re only interested when it’s easy. I thought I meant more to you than that, you bastard!”
The hurt on his face is so raw that Jensen feels physical pain at the sight of it and his breath catches, stuck around the lump in his throat. He stands still, feeling like he’s been slapped in the face until Colin turns away and reaches for the door. Then Jensen moves, he’s reaching a hand to the teen’s shoulder, gripping it hard to stop him in his tracks. He takes a step closer, wanting to turn his lover back around but he doesn’t think he can look at him right now. He lifts his other hand to Colin’s other shoulder and moves closer, dropping his forehead to rest on the top of the teen’s head and sighs, “You have absolutely no idea, do you?” his voice is raspy like he’s swallowing around something sharp.
Colin tenses again, moving forward and spinning around at the same time so that Jensen’s left standing there, off balance, as usual when it comes to the teen, “About you? Relationships? No, Jensen, I don’t, it’s obvious that I don’t have a fucking clue!” he says, his voice breaking, on the verge of tears, now.
Jensen can’t help the huff of laughter than escapes his mouth, with it some of the tension he’s holding onto, “How can someone as smart as you be so fucking stupid, Colin?”
The teen frowns in confusion and a tear slips down one side of his face, “Don’t you dare call me stupid,” he sounds angier, now, though he’s never looked more vulnerable, “this is all new to me, Jen, how the fuck am I supposed to know what that even means if you don’t tell me?”
Jensen swallows at the stark reminder that despite his maturity that Colin is still only fifteen, he really does have no clue what relationships and fights are about. “I’m not saying you’re stupid,” he sighs, “maybe clueless is a better word, naive, definitely.”
“Doesn’t sound much better!” Colin snaps.
Jensen presses his fingers to the bridge of his nose in frustration, sighing again before he opens his eyes and looks directly into the teen’s, “I’m trying to protect you, here, Colin. Do you understand what would happen if we got caught? Properly understand, I mean? The whole ramifications of us having a relationship?”
Colin nods, “You could lose your job.”
“It’s not just that,” he puts a hand on Colin’s shoulder again, using the other to grasp his chin so the teen can’t look away, “I’d never be able to work as a teacher again. I could be charged with statutory rape if anyone found out,” his stomach twists but he knows he has to say it, “you could press charges if you wanted to.”
The look on Colin’s face is that of a kicked puppy, “I’d never… you really think I’d do that?” he whispers, another tear streaming down his cheek and onto Jensen’s thumb, “Why would you think that?”
Jensen moves his hand from Colin’s shoulder to cup his cheek, brushing away more tears where they’re flowing freely, now, “No, baby, I don’t think that… what I’m saying is that you could and I guess if I was a decent guy I’d be telling you to do it. I should walk away and tell you to find someone your own age, but...” he swallows around the lump in his throat.
Colin lets out a small sob, gripping Jensen’s wrist, “You are a decent guy, Jen,” frowning at the snort Jensen lets out, “but… what?”
“Huh?” Jensen asks, his head swimming, not following Colin’s train of thought.
“You said ‘should’ and ‘but’ … does that mean... you hate me...” he leaves it open and the look on his beautiful face is a combination of hope and uncertainty, as if he’s steeling himself for his world is about to come crashing down.
The older man blinks is disbelief, “Jesus, Colin, hate you?”, he moves the hand that was holding the teen’s chin and lays it over his chest, feeling the thump of his heartbeat underneath. He takes a deep breath and looks more intently into Colin’s eyes, “I got mad at us for being impulsive yet again… I got mad because no matter how hard I try I can’t seem to control myself around you because you make me so fucking crazy, and you think…” he struggles to take a breath between all the words falling out of his mouth, “you think I hate you?”
Colin’s frown deepens, “But you ignored me and pushed me away, I thought you wouldn’t want me because I wasn’t careful enough....”
Jensen growls and slides his hand from Colin’s chest to his upper arm again, gripping tightly and pulling him closer, “I fucking love you, you idiot!” he slams his lips into Colin’s, hearing a sharp intake of breath. He pulls away, looking at the teen’s face, “I shouldn’t love you, I know that. I’m risking everything but…God damn it!,” all his good intentions go out of the window as he leans in again, less forceful this time, Colin returning the kiss. Jensen wants to lose himself in it but he pulls away to prove his own point, “We have to be much more cautious, no more stupid risks. We have to … I have to show some restraint, I’m the…” he wants to say adult but knows that will only make it worse, “I’m the more experienced one. We can do this, but we have to make a plan and stick to it, OK?”
Colin is smiling through his tears, nodding his head so hard that his perfectly styled hair is shaking lose, “I love you, too, Jen, so fucking much,” he says before he flings his arms around the older man and holds on tight.
Jensen holds back just as tight, kissing the top of Colin’s head, butterflies in his stomach flapping like crazy, “We’re gonna be OK,” he says, over and over, hoping against hope he’s telling the truth.
§
It’s eight days since they last saw each other and Colin misses Jensen more than he thought it was possible to miss another person, but he’s barely stopped smiling through it. He’s been teased and grilled, especially by his mom and Elle, who’s surprised him by just shrugging and accepting it when he said he was dating a guy, but he’s remained strong in the face of their nagging. He’s not snapped at their taunts, nor has he given out more than basic information about ‘Cedric’. He’s had to tell them something, so he’s sticking with it being someone from school, someone older and fairly new to the area and most importantly, no, they don’t know him. He’s hinted that Cedric lives a little further out of town so that it gives him an excuse to spend longer out on his ‘dates’ with him.
He has of course run all this by Jensen, who’s agreed it’s for the best. In the New Year Colin and Cedric will go on their first official date, and when the time is right the family will get to meet him. They’re going to have to come up with some break up story somewhere down the line but for now people seem to be buying it. Elle is doing her best to catch Colin out, but he knows her too well so her tactics aren’t working. For now he just has to make it another few days before Jensen’s home from Dallas and then they can finally be together again.
“Honey, are you going to get off your phone at any point today?” his mom huffs, putting another two baking trays in the oven, “I could use a hand, here.”
CF: Mom’s hassling me for help. So much party food around here it looks like we’re catering the whole street not a family party!
Cedric: Do it, man, a pissed off mom is not to be messed with. I’d forgotten how true that is. I’m hiding in my room pretending to have a nap just to get time to myself! #sorrynotsorry
CF: Still driving you mad?
Cedric: It’s what moms do. It’s been great spending time here but I’m ready to come home to you, now. Just one more night of plastering on fake smiles for old family friends before it’s just mom, dad, me, my brother & sister. Then back to the peace & quiet & time for us. Can’t wait!
A warm heat spreads across the teen’s chest at the ‘home to you’ part of Jensen’s message until he hears a clatter from the kitchen, “Mom?” he shouts, “You alive in there?”
“Shit! Some help, please, now!” she calls, tone leaving no room for argument.
CF: I have faith in you, you can make it! Gotta go before mom breaks the kitchen. Call me later?
Cedric: As long as I can get away I will. Love you x
CF: I don’t care what time, wake me up. Love you too <3
In the chaos of food preparation, the party itself and getting his mom home after a couple of glasses of champagne too many it’s past 1am before Colin even gets the chance to check his phone and sees the battery is dead. It’s been a while since he enjoyed a family party but he’s been in such a good mood he went with the flow, playing games with the younger kids, hanging with Elle and Rachel. He’s always liked Rachel, she treats him like an equal, not a kid, and he can see why Jensen gets on with her, too.
He puts his phone on charge, gets ready for bed then climbs under the covers, turning the phone on when it reaches 10% power. Email and text notifications go off and he turns the volume off, his mom is already asleep and he doesn’t want to wake her though it’s unlikely after her alcohol consumption. There are two messages from Jensen and he thumbs them open as soon as the window pops up.
Cedric: How’s the party going?
Cedric: Going to bed early, will call you tomorrow.
Colin frowns, the last message was sent a little after 9pm and something is off about it, he can tell, Jensen never goes to be that early. The older man has called him every night he’s been away after going to bed and it’s been 11pm at the earliest, except his first night there because he was worn out from the end of school, travelling and being overwhelmed by seeing everyone after almost a year.
CF: Phone was dead, sorry. Party was pretty cool. How about yours, everything go OK?
Jensen reads the message almost straight away and Colin smiles, still hoping for a call. The screen changes to ‘Cedric typing’ and the teen waits… and waits and waits. He expects a hell of a long message so is surprised by the short reply.
Cedric: Shitty night. Wish you were here, could do with a hug.
His thumb hovers over the call button but he decides to test the waters instead.
CF: Why what happened? I wish I was there, too. Not long now x
Cedric: Long story, tell you when I get back.
CF: Are you sure? I can call you...
Cedric: Nah not tonight. Get some sleep.
He can’t help but feel disappointed, something’s bothering Jensen and Colin wants to help but he can’t until he knows what it is. The fact that the man is outright refusing to talk about what made the night shitty bothers him…he wants to push it, call Jensen anyway and see what he can get out of him but he knows it’s selfish. He’s trying to look at things with a more mature attitude, now, he wants to show Jensen that he can handle the responsibility of their relationship but that doesn’t mean it’s easy for him. With a sigh he puts his phone back on his nightstand and falls into an uneasy sleep.
§
Jensen slams the cab door harder than he intended to and shouts a belated apology to the driver as he’s fishing his house keys out of his pocket. Rachel had agreed to collect him from the airport but he’s flown back two days early and he doesn’t want an inquisition. What he wants is to forget the past fifteen hours or so, a hot shower, to see Colin and sleep in his own bed where he can relax.. As soon as he’s dumped his bag in the bedroom he sits on the bed and pulls his phone and sends the message he’s had in his drafts for three hours.
JA: Good news, kiddo, coming home early.
Dobby: What? Why? When?
He can’t help but smile, it’s typical Colin to bombard him with questions, and that’s why he’s not sent the message before. He really didn’t - doesn’t - want to answer questions right now but he knows he’ll have to and he’d rather not do it over WhatsApp. His first priority is getting time with his boy.
JA: You never ask that many questions at school! LOL
I just got back, really want to see you. Is your mom home?
He looks at his watch and sees it’s only 11am, it won’t be dark for hours yet, and they’d agreed for the time being they’d get together when it was dark out to reduce the risk of anyone seeing them, “Shit!” he curses himself for not waiting until later to send the message.
Dobby: What happened, are you OK? She’s working the night shift, leaves around 7pm.
JA: I’ll be fine once I see you. Can you get away before that?
He knows he’s probably sounding desperate but at this point he doesn’t care.
Dobby: Sure, I’ll tell her I’m going to Elle’s, I’ll leave at 4pm. Where are we going?
Jensen’s weighed the options up already and there’s only one choice, they can’t have this conversation during a ‘casual’ public encounter, he has no idea how Colin’s going to react to what he has to tell him..
JA: Need you here. I’ll pick you up at the back of Benedict’s coffee shop at 4.15?
Dobby: Awesome! :D :D :D
§
Colin is buzzing with nervous excitement, bouncing on the balls of his feet as he waits in the queue at the coffee shop. He couldn’t stand being in the house so he’d left at 3.20pm it wasn’t dark but it was dull and by the time he’s walked there it was well on the way. He texted Jensen to collect him at 4pm instead and orders them cinnamon rolls and large coffees to go, both black with a couple of pumps of gingerbread spice syrup in because he knows how much Jensen loves it as long as it’s not too overdone. He prefers flavour not sweetness, and Colin wants to taste it off the man’s lips as soon as possible. As soon as the order is ready he messages again.
CF: Ready to go, let me know when you’re on your way.
Cedric: Already here!
He smirks when the reply comes and he notices it’s 3.55pm, they’re obviously as keen as each other.
As soon as Jensen pulls the truck into his garage and the door closes behind them, blocking them from view Colin grabs Jensen’s shoulder and pulls the older man towards him, pressing a desperate kiss to his lips. Jensen kisses him back but is chuckling, “What?” the teen says as he pulls away.
“At least wait until we get inside, can’t you?”
Colin glares at him and climbs out of the truck, coffee and pastries in hand and waits for Jensen to unlock the internal door. Once they’re both in the house he puts his purchases on the kitchen counter, unzips his coat and hangs it over the back of a dining chair. He hears Jensen’s footsteps behind him and feels strong arms snake around his waist and hold tight, pulling the teen’s back against his chest, “Now who’s keen?” Colin teases as he turns in Jensen’s embrace.
He looks up and sees a frown darkening the man’s features. He reaches up to Jensen’s cheek and brushes a thumb over his cheek before leaning in to kiss him again, softer this time but still passionate. Jensen holds tighter and kisses him harshly, clinging onto him with desperation, but something’s not right, “What’s going on?” he asks softly when he breaks the kiss. Jensen opens his eyes and they’re pained, making Colin immediately worried.
“I just missed you,” he says, leaning forward to bury his face in Colin’s neck. The teen holds him tight when he feels the older man’s breathing hitch, “I hated being without you.”
As happy as Colin would normally be to have Jensen in his arms, he pulls away, lacing their fingers together and leading the older man to the couch. He brings their joined hands into his lap and cups Jensen’s jaw, “What’s happened, Jen?” He can see several emotions crossing the older man’s face before he speaks and it’s not helping Colin’s suddenly rising nerves.
“It’s nothing, really,” he says then winces a little as the teen raises an eyebrow, not buying it for a second, “OK, well it shouldn’t be a big deal but I had to get out of there, I had to get away from him.”
“From who?” Colin asks, wondering if there’s a part of the conversation he’s totally missed.
Jensen squeezes his hand, “My ex, Jared.
Chapter 16
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