Blue Christmas
companioning grief during the holidays
Sunday, December 14 | 7-8pm
The thing about grief is that it doesn’t take a holiday.
And when someone you care about isn’t here anymore, the Christmas season can be painful and you may not feel that there’s space for heartbreak and missing someone and feeling sad during the “most wonderful time of the year.”
No two people are the same when it comes to grieving the loss of a loved one, but what we know is that when we lose someone we care about, grief can feel like a wilderness for which there seems to be no map. It can feel like aimless wandering at times, and we may feel ill equipped for the journey.
And the calendar? It pauses for no one, and whether we are ready or not, we enter into this beautiful season of Advent. With growing expectancy and joyful anticipation, the days march on and we keep moving towards this abundant celebration of Christ the King, come to earth. What joyous news!
And yet, for the heart broken, it can be terribly confusing and utterly isolating to be unsure of how to celebrate when we feel this profound absence that cannot and will not be ignored. Grief does not mean that we will never celebrate again or that we are deprived not only of their presence on earth, but of joy itself. But grief needs space and we need space. Space to mourn, to honour our losses, to attend to our sorrow, and to be comforted.
What does a Blue Christmas look like?
Sunday, December 14 | 7pm – 8pm
in the Commons
no registration required
THE START
The evening will include a brief message that is sensitive and relevant to the space we have thoughtfully prepared and mindful of the guests we have invited (you!).
We will be led through a candle lighting and you may choose to observe or engage with lighting a candle in honour of the one you’re missing.
Attendees will be invited to write their person’s name or descriptor (i.e. brother, grandma, friend) and place it on your candle, which will remain lit for the rest of the evening. Through the candle lighting we pause to remember our loved ones, we pray, and we quietly reflect.
THE MIDDLE
You will be given the option to stay seated and reflect while instrumental music plays or individually visit spaces set up at the perimeter of the Commons: spaces for individual prayer, writing, making a simple ornament or garden stone, remembering your loved one, and peaceful contemplation.
We assure you, there will be nothing that you have to do, or say, or be in this space at this time.
Some will choose to sit and quietly reflect with a warm drink while the instrumental music continues, some will find solace in prayer or creative engagement; we hope that wherever you are at, this space we have thoughtfully prepared feels welcome and safe.
THE FINISH
The evening will close (within the hour) with one carefully chosen instrumental piece and some reachable ideas for companioning grief during the holidays.
After the closing prayer, the Commons will remain open and we will be there for an additional hour, if anyone wishes to stay a little longer.
Will I be expected to talk or share?
There will be no expectation to share and no questions will be asked. No one needs to be or do or say anything during this evening. Just come. The evening is designed for attendees to engage as much or as little as feels comfortable (with tissue boxes everywhere and an open door at the rear to discretely exit if you need to).
Blue Christmas
Sunday, December 14 | 7pm – 8pm
no registration required
Grief is not something to be cured, it is something to be companioned and our hope and prayer that is that, wherever you are at, you will feel supported and less isolated this season. If you have lost someone you care about, please join us.
You are not alone.
You have fellow mourners and perhaps more importantly, you are loved by the One we celebrate this season, One who is close and promises comfort to the mourner.
Whether you lost someone this past year or many years ago, we want you to know there is space for you on the evening of December 14th.
Wherever you find yourself in your grief, you are welcome.