Obligatory about me.

Name: Sarah

Meaning: Princess

I actually loathe my first name. It's very common, boring, and the reason behind it is simply because "it was in the Bible". I especially dislike it because of the meaning it has combined with my middle name, which is 'Elaine'. So essentially my name means "princess light". It sounds goofy and gross and I dislike it. But my middle name by itself? I love it! It's a variant form of Helen and was borne in Arthurian legend. I -LOVE- that. That's such a cool name. I'd love it my name were Elaine because I could be nicknamed Lainey!

Age: 28

Birthday: February 11, 1988 @ 6:44 PM

Zodiac Sign: Aquarian

Sun Sign: Leo

Rising Sign: Saggitarius

Element: Fire

Chinese Zodiac: Rabbit  [I was just shy of being a Dragon argh!]

Location: New York

Birthplace: Tucker, GA

Height: 5'2"~

I'm reasonably short, stocky, and muscular. I'm not thin at all, but I'm not really fat either? I'm more or less in the middle and with a heavy skeleton on top of muscle it's a bit of a comical appearance sadly. I am broad-shouldered, short-waisted, and short-legged. This makes it very difficult to find clothing that actually flatters my figure because I'm so mismatched.

I have naturally blonde hair, but I love dying it various colors. I'm on a pink and purple trend now. I used to like cutting it short, and while I really love pixie cuts and mohawks, I think I'm done with trying to achieve that look. I will grow it out long, and feel more free.

I am married to my husband Azmondeus as of June 26, 2016 after about three and a half years together. I never thought THAT day would come, lmao.

- I don't like being nude.

......º This has nothing to do with a lack of tolerance; by all means walk around naked if you choose, even if it's in front of me or I'm at your house, etc. That doesn't bother me. I just don't like the drafty feeling, ha. I don't feel any more or less connected in clothing than out of it, and I tend to be temperature sensitive. Even if it's reasonably warm I'll be kind of cold. I like loose shirts and underwear - that's the extent of it. Most of the time, when I'm comfortable enough, that's what I'll hang out in.

- Clothing I like.

......º Boyshorts. Cargo shorts. Nightgowns. Broken-in jeans. Huge hoodies. Graphic tees. Cute animal hoods. Feathers, beads, teeth. Cruelty-free (if I can) clothing. Sneakers. Creepers. Slippers. Thigh-high socks. Oversized t-shirts. Fedoras. Stove-pipe hats. Arm warmers. Fingerless gloves. Corsets. Petticoats. Costumes. Ugg boots (or similar). Yoga pants. Sports bras. Headscarves. Swing dresses. I wear men's and women's clothes depending on my mood. I don't mind form-fitting clothing but it must have stretch - I like to move around and I don't like clothing that prevents me from stretching.

- Sexuality & Attraction.

......º As much as I don't like labels, I do fall right in the middle of the asexual part of the spectrum. Growing up I took little interest in sex with people. I did not date in high school and this had nothing to do with religion; I simply didn't have the desire to. I was too busy watching anime and playing video games to really care about those kinds of things, and I guessed it would show up eventually? Fast-forward ten years. I gave my virginity to the person I married, and even shared a bed with someone I was interested in prior to that without any sort of sexual behavior. I don't care or want sex, and I get nothing sexual out of it. I see it as intimacy and that's really it. In a way, it's all for him. I don't expect anything out of it at all. I am more than happy to give because it makes up for what he cannot give me (he's tried, trust me). That said, I'm a huge cuddler and love physical contact - but only with him. I cannot feel any sort of attraction to someone unless I'm deeply invested in them already.

-Monogamy.

......º I'm monogamous simply because I'm very possessive and don't like sharing. I'm also tremendously loyal. I don't look anywhere else and because I don't understand attraction (because I literally can't feel it!), it's VERY difficult for me to understand just looking at someone and being drawn to them on a physical level.

- I do not crave social interaction.

......º This part of me has always been there. Growing up, I never really had friends. But at the same time, I never CRAVED friendship. I have been fortunate enough to been part of an amazing group of people (an entry on that later) for a short time, but my craving for their company was little to do with the aspect of being with them. Even while being alone, I was content there. I do not know that such a thing wouldn't get boring, but for the time, it was enough for me? Now, my social needs are more or less filled by my husband. But I don't need much - acknowledgement, and someone to cuddle when I need it. I've always been at my best spiritually when I am alone.

- I believe in forgiveness and mercy.

......º I absolutely cannot HELP myself when it comes to this. I'm seen as very soft-hearted and weak as a result. But no matter what terrible thing a person has done, the greatest thing you can do is forgive them - not seek revenge. For that reason, I don't believe that murder or revenge are ever the right way to react and it's rendered me into a pacifist. My aunt was killed many years ago and I was the only one in my family willing to forgive the man. It is not easy to forgive - it is easy to hate, to seek revenge. But hate eats me up inside and makes me very, very sick. I can't hate. I didn't hate my father no matter how he treated me or my mother, or how he reacted when he was sick. I thought I did, but in the end I felt terrible for him. I do imagine a utopia, and I'm sure I'd be insulted for those beliefs. But I do. Does that mean that I think people should just be let out of jail or actions should go unpunished? -NO-. It means that, if a person shows a willingness to change, they deserve that chance.

- I am spiritually open-minded.

......º I may or may not consider everything a possibility. I believe in the power of creation. But I believe that humans can more or less will anything into existence, will events into happening, etc. Things exist BECAUSE we believe in them. Human will is stronger than any force on this earth, and we create our own realities. And when backed up by enough belief, they are just as real as anything. It is both a great power and a great curse. I tend to go along the lines that humans are one giant soul with several bodies, but it's never concrete. I love listening to people speak about their beliefs because it is a very core element of their being. Even if I don't share those views. I was raised to be a very closed-minded Christian, but broke away from that after I realized it just didn't make sense for me.

- I hate politics.

......º I understand that they're important. But it's turned into a disgusting game of insults and mud-slinging when I feel problems could be solved if people worked together. I don't believe all politicians are necessarily corrupt or evil, and I don't believe presidential candidates are evil. I believe most of them are doing what they feel is best - even if they make some mistakes along the way. But because I am so picky, I refused to play the game. But I won't complain about who wins because of that! If it came down to it, and I didn't want to live in this country anymore, I would set plans to leave. I hate that our country has a terrible name, how we're filled with so much hubris because we're supposedly "the greatest country in the world" (which my father once insisted to me was fact) - which is an insult to every other country. My father tried to force feed me politics as a kid, would yell and scream at the television and radio, and say terrible racist slurs about Obama and it's left such a terrible taste in my mouth! I will help people in my own way.

- I can't smile.

......º They say a smile is the most beautiful part of a person. Not so, when you're blessed with a long upper lip, short nose, tiny and narrow lips, and broad jaws. Not so, when you've never smiled much as a child. My smile varies anywhere from Mona Lisa to a werewolf snarl and there is no in between. I've learned to live with it, but I do want larger lips for the sake of actually having a reasonably balanced facial structure! I don't know how to control those muscles because they've probably atrophied or something, ha! I do laugh a lot - by covering my mouth and giggling incessantly into my hands.

- I love earth-based beliefs.

......º Discovering this (as it is almost the antithesis of Christianity to avoid 'earthly' things) was what began my secession from the Christian belief system. I was told my entire life I was not of the earth, and yet I felt very much a part of it. I was drawn to animal spirits, totems, and all manner of things I had no real skill to use. I felt comfortable outside amidst the grass and trees and I felt that someday I would go back into the earth to nourish it. My spirit may go elsewhere? Or whatever this summary of my thoughts and feelings is - but my body was here. Growing older I embraced it a bit more, appreciating the concepts of Wiccanism (and wishing I was a witch, ha!). Alas, I do not feel I have the ability to connect to nature in the manner of witches, shaman, or therians. I feel I would make a mockery of it somehow. So I appreciate from a distance.

- I challenge my own world-views.

......º OR I AT LEAST TRY TO. Perhaps it may come across as me being wishy-washy, I don't know. But when I stumble upon something that makes me go, "Oh! Now I get it!" And I can apply it to my life moving forward, I think it makes for an interesting experience. I also like to be accomodating in that regard. Maybe someone doesn't like swearing and it genuinely upsets them. I've never met somebody like that before, but whenever I'm around them I'll do my very best to go without swearing. It isn't like it's necessary anyway. Of course, I'd warn them that it might potentially slip because I habitually swear but you get the idea.

- I'm not a fan of kids.

......º I think it's a lot to do with my senses. Children tend to be loud and high-pitched, which upsets me and hurts my ears and gives me headaches. They tend to smell funny, which can make me sick or give me headaches, and they tend to have way too much energy, which is an assault on my psyche as it is. I don't know how to interact with children. I don't babysit (though I have been forced to on some occasions, and it was the most awkward experience I've had in recent years) and I can barely tolerate older children. Teenagers aren't too bad, as they're shedding the last layers of young childhood. But in general, kids definitely aren't for me.