Thank you, 2015, for being a year of exploration of what I thought possible and confrontation of what I thought was not. You were a year of great apprehension leading up to incredible experiences, a year of feeling like my eyes were closed as I walked up a staircase, never knowing if there was another step to climb or nothing left at all for my feet to fall on. You were a year to stretch my creativity and face my fears, a year to understand the ebb and flow of stresses as obstacles and challenges were overcome (or circumvented...).
You were a year of new friendships and a year of fond old ties, a year of rekindling family bonds and going on scary but amazing adventures. You taught me humility like no other year before you, and you taught me resilience, determination, and perseverance, one day at a time. You swept me up in panic and you enfolded me in comfort. You played a partner in this pas de deux that I was never sure of but in the end you never let me fall.
I will remember days and days of frantic packing toward new house exploits, friends scattering to different places like confetti from a burst pinata. I will remember lazy weekends of catching up on sleep and chores and episodes of shows on Netflix, sister visitors, cuddles, dancing the skin of my feet off (literally, ew), and finding ways to avoid being productive for hours on end.
I will remember a summer full of mosquito bites and crying infants. I will remember a fear of failure sharper than any razor but more easily defeated than spider webs. I will remember how it feels to triumph over anxiety time and time again because to this day I’ll never know if I will beat it the next time.
I will remember my family gathered around the kitchen table--no nonsense, mission faces on, rolling sushi like our lives depended on it. I will always remember that they can clean up pretty good when they need to but it might take a while and it’s very unlikely for them to be able to leave the house on time. Also my parents are really cute when they try to dance but it is pretty funny to watch. I’ll remember alarming growth spurts and voice changes and family Pictionary games that got a little too intense--as well as “easy peasy lemon squeezy” and thank God for Kevin at all-you-can-eat sushi.
I will remember Calgary snow and watching the sunrise every morning. I’ll remember hot tea and frozen feet (DAMMIT ADRIAN), 2-year-old tourguides, and realtalks on pitch-black highways. I will remember how it feels to struggle to gather my bearings, and how it feels to hold my own against what seemed like insurmountable odds the day before.
I will remember toddlers that sometimes just need a hug, and I will remember that a little kindness and just a bit of effort at the end of the day can get you very far indeed.
I will remember the maize maze and trying to navigate it but not really and kind of just following along and singing songs. I will remember having friends come visit to study or to hang out and eat Mexican food slash watch Frankenstein and feel really uninterested in it (some may or may not have fallen asleep, just saying...).
I will remember housemate Kim Possible marathons and random food projects. I’ll also NEVER FORGET the true technological struggles (ie/Windows 10 and how much it made me cry). I’ll always think of Cards Against Humanity and Room Escapes and pretending not to notice when my dad manages to lazy logic his way out of the room without actually looking for clues (ugh Dad this is why we can’t have nice things). I will remember watching Big Hero 6 more times than what's probably healthy or sane and still hoping Tadashi won't go into the building every time...
I will remember hair cuts and gummy stuff and bubble tea downtown. I’ll remember Mac Med Musical and how much my parents enjoyed it even if they didn’t get most of the actual medical jokes. I will remember all the reunions and all the laughs, the smiles, the tears. I’ll remember fireworks and Tyler Shaw songs and belting out High School Musical in the dark. I will remember Mac Med Funk and it’ll get stuck in my head forever (take a sip... diabetes.) I’ll remember snow days and wearing my pyjamas inside out AND backwards the night before, hoping hoping hoping.
Thank you 2015, and goodbye! I wish you a lifetime of memories that make me smile in the years to come.
Hello, 2016, and welcome! I’m looking forward to the ways you will try to scare the crap out of me (and likely succeed, at least for a little while). I’m looking forward to the new people you’ll bring into my life and the people I will get back in touch with. I’m looking forward to the things I will learn and the things I will be able to (maybe) teach and share with other people. I’m looking forward to dancing and laughing and cursing at my computer screen when my sister wheedles me into playing with her and everything is infuriating and the lag is real.
Wishing everyone the best year yet! <3
bffimagine
lt_library, instead of friending me here. At the moment, it really has nothing other than the KPop stuff that we've been fangirling over, but other stuff will probably come. Eventually.
lazy