Journal created:
on 21 September 2003 (#1338917)
Updated:
on 18 February 2026
Name:
Southpaw Bear
Hi! I'm a big shaggy brown bear called Southpaw.
I'm about 2.1m (7ft) tall, reasonably solid but not really fat (think Kenai). I have a gorgeous thick coat of soft brown fur which is slightly lighter in colour on my chest and tummy. My paws are powerful with strong claws, but my forepaws are also dextrous enough to type (although not accurately) and use a pencil. I am happy on two legs when the situation requires, but prefer four for covering serious distances.
My movie is Brother Bear - it makes me cry every time. Yeah, those bears are cool. I think I have a crush on Kenai. And Koda is so cute!
I just generally do my own thing and try to make the most of life. Feel free to say hi!
These days I don't focus too much on the past, but if you're wondering a little about how I discovered I was a bear, read on.
July 2002
A cold wind is blowing over the ridges and gullies of Mount Ruapehu. It ruffles the surface of a small mountain lake and shakes the Tussock grasses and the Beech trees. There is snow on the ground, and a few stray flakes drift down from a sky of hurrying grey clouds. A snow shower has just passed, and another is gathering in the teeth of the wind to the south west.
A figure is sitting on a fallen log by the lake. He is not entirely human. He is tall, solid, muscular, and he is covered in thick, shaggy brown fur. The wind is cold, and snowflakes have settled on his shoulders and head, but he doesn't notice. Below him lies the vast bulk of the volcano, sleeping uneasily. Before him is the small lake, and he gazes into it's dark depths.
A single tear runs from his eye and trickles down a furry cheek. He sniffs and wipes his eyes with a paw which has five large, powerful claws. He continues to stare into the lake.
He doesn't know what he is, but he knows that he is different from other humans and he has never fitted in. He is very lonely, but he thinks he will never meet another like himself.
But sitting there by the lake, he thinks that he has found the most beautiful place in all the world. He realises that the world has been trying to imprison him, grind him down, and he swears that he won't let it happen again.
He takes a grip of his pain and loneliness, rises, and walks off down a rough path through the trees as the snow starts to fall again. He is resigned to always being alone.
June 2003
He has returned to civilisation and life amongst humans, determined to follow his own dreams and live his own life. He begins studying geology, taking up a life long interest. For a while things seem to be going well. But he still doesn't know what he is, and he is still desperately lonely. If only there were others like himself!
Finally it becomes too much for him. He posts a message to a newsgroup called alt.lifestyle.furry. He doesn't really know what a furry is, and he hasn't even taken any time to lurk. He doesn't really expect anyone to be listening or to be any help. He just feels he needs to say some things, even if no-one takes any notice.
But he is delighted to find that some furries answer - wolves and lions and foxes and... things that can't be easily described... and other bears.
Many of them have been where he is. They, too, don't seem to fit in. And suddenly he realises that there are others out there like himself. He feels like he has finally come home. He has found a place where he doesn't have to hide his fur and his claws.
He suddenly sees his own nature for what it is. He is a bear. More than that, he is Southpaw.
May the furry journey continue!
I'm about 2.1m (7ft) tall, reasonably solid but not really fat (think Kenai). I have a gorgeous thick coat of soft brown fur which is slightly lighter in colour on my chest and tummy. My paws are powerful with strong claws, but my forepaws are also dextrous enough to type (although not accurately) and use a pencil. I am happy on two legs when the situation requires, but prefer four for covering serious distances.
My movie is Brother Bear - it makes me cry every time. Yeah, those bears are cool. I think I have a crush on Kenai. And Koda is so cute!
I just generally do my own thing and try to make the most of life. Feel free to say hi!
These days I don't focus too much on the past, but if you're wondering a little about how I discovered I was a bear, read on.
July 2002
A cold wind is blowing over the ridges and gullies of Mount Ruapehu. It ruffles the surface of a small mountain lake and shakes the Tussock grasses and the Beech trees. There is snow on the ground, and a few stray flakes drift down from a sky of hurrying grey clouds. A snow shower has just passed, and another is gathering in the teeth of the wind to the south west.
A figure is sitting on a fallen log by the lake. He is not entirely human. He is tall, solid, muscular, and he is covered in thick, shaggy brown fur. The wind is cold, and snowflakes have settled on his shoulders and head, but he doesn't notice. Below him lies the vast bulk of the volcano, sleeping uneasily. Before him is the small lake, and he gazes into it's dark depths.
A single tear runs from his eye and trickles down a furry cheek. He sniffs and wipes his eyes with a paw which has five large, powerful claws. He continues to stare into the lake.
He doesn't know what he is, but he knows that he is different from other humans and he has never fitted in. He is very lonely, but he thinks he will never meet another like himself.
But sitting there by the lake, he thinks that he has found the most beautiful place in all the world. He realises that the world has been trying to imprison him, grind him down, and he swears that he won't let it happen again.
He takes a grip of his pain and loneliness, rises, and walks off down a rough path through the trees as the snow starts to fall again. He is resigned to always being alone.
June 2003
He has returned to civilisation and life amongst humans, determined to follow his own dreams and live his own life. He begins studying geology, taking up a life long interest. For a while things seem to be going well. But he still doesn't know what he is, and he is still desperately lonely. If only there were others like himself!
Finally it becomes too much for him. He posts a message to a newsgroup called alt.lifestyle.furry. He doesn't really know what a furry is, and he hasn't even taken any time to lurk. He doesn't really expect anyone to be listening or to be any help. He just feels he needs to say some things, even if no-one takes any notice.
But he is delighted to find that some furries answer - wolves and lions and foxes and... things that can't be easily described... and other bears.
Many of them have been where he is. They, too, don't seem to fit in. And suddenly he realises that there are others out there like himself. He feels like he has finally come home. He has found a place where he doesn't have to hide his fur and his claws.
He suddenly sees his own nature for what it is. He is a bear. More than that, he is Southpaw.
May the furry journey continue!