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Male Submissive, 35
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Dominant Couple, 35, Hamilton, Ohio
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Female Dominant, 40, Long Beach, California
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About sinandhoney
Hello my name is Sindy. I'm a 36 yr old Sadist and submissive/bottom/painslut I enjoy giving and receiving pain.
I am active in the local scene and at this time am only interested in meeting people who are willing to join said group if things click, as it's a big part of my life.
I've been in this for some 6-8 yrs. I took some time off and have been active for the past year. At this time I am not looking to meet male submissives to many are do-me and too passive aggressive for me and I just don't have the patience right now.
I am not a slave. I am a submissive. To me the difference is the level of control one gives over. I don't wish to be micro-managed. I want to belong to someone but not contrary to who I am. I am looking for someone I compliment, not someone to change me.
I do not switch with the same person. As a Domina I'm really a tad more of a sadist. Please if you wish to email me, approach me as a person not by an orientation, do not come with a laundry list of things you want me to do to you. I am a person, not a tool for you to get your kink off. Sides if I'm in charge it's really about what I want, not so much you.
I do have congestive heart failure, which is a fancy way of saying my heart doesn't pump at full capacity. I am in no way in danger of heart attack and do have a ICD to prevent that from happening. I have played and fairly heavy with out any side effects so far and nor do I anticipate any problems. |
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Are you ready for
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Email for more information. |
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I am full of nervous energy. I can already feel the things I am
waiting for saturday to bring.
I can feel the skin beneath my hands, can feel the sting as my hand
hits a willing bottom. I can feel the weight of my floggers and the
weight of the crop as I beat out my energy onto a willing submissive.
I can feel the excitement rising as I am naked and bound. Waiting
for the first touch or strike. I can smell the leather, can hear the
crack of the whip. I can hear the intake of air as I breathe in sharply
startled by the noise and excited by the sound. I can feel the breath
on the back of my neck, the whispering in my ear, being told I'm a good
girl, or being asked what I need.
What I need is usually the same answer, more, I am after all such a
greedy little slut ~smile~
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I've been single officially a year now.
I can feel the excitement for something new. I am full of hope and
optimism. I have been trying new things across the board, from food to
people. So far it's working out pretty good ~smile~ I'm excited for
the first time in a long time. And very determined not to let people
rain on my parade. I'm not letting anyone set me back or spoil this
feeling. I feel to good for all that. I'm looking forward to what the
future has to bring.
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I appreciate the concern shown by those who have read my journal, but please stop sending me emails about how that wasn't D/s or giving me advice.? That wasn't D/s it was a vanilla relationship and I've gone through the womens shelter and gotten counciling.
I'm in a good place and much stronger and will never again ignore the red flags when they pop up.? And for now I will not play with those unwilling to join the local group I'm in since they are a huge part of my life and one I'm not willing to do with out.? Also it helps make me feel a bit safer to play and watch them interact with others before moving to private.
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Well another night of insomnia, just as I was thinking I had over come it.
I hate that everyday things just seem to trigger memories I can't shut away.
For those just meeting me I recently walked away from a 4yr very abusive relationship.? This was a vanilla relationship so there was no confusion with the D/s stuff, but rather something that slowly grew over time until I found I was scared to live.
Much of what happened was choices I made to make life easier for me, but the abuse the blame for that is his to carry.
And right now I am just angry.? I hate that even though I was able to find myself and get back to the wonderful person I am, that the things he did still affect me.
There are things now that I simply can not do.? There is a wonderful Dom I know who's play has always fascinated me.? His scenes are very powerful.? He likes for a sub to struggle and fight back a bit.
I can hardly watch him play now.? To see someone yanked around by their hair just flashes me back.? I remember having my hair grabbed in order for him to try and get a shot at me.? Sitting there afterwards pulling all the hair out that he had loosened and the hanks of hair that would be left on the floor.
I used to love having my hair pulled, now I worry about protecting the hair I have left.
I know I will never again lose who I am for someone else.? That I will stay? true to my core.? I will not be in a rush to settle down and ignore things that might point to a red flag or two.
I know each day with the love of my friends and the life I have re-claimed for myself I get stronger.? I know he will not win, even with me being single I am not alone.
I know I will get healthier.? I will get back to exploring this side of me that I have missed.? I will take advantage of my friends I have stayed away from and never miss a moment to let them know what they mean to me.? I lost 2 very good friends during my time away, one I got a chance to tell how much I loved them, the other I did not.
I won't let regrets keep me down.? I will make the most of the time I have left on this earth.? I will go out with bells on, and they will know I lived my life with gusto
I make sure to laugh good and loud each day and to bring laughter to those around me.? It's the best kind of healing and the best medicine.
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Male Dominant, 42
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Male Submissive, 58, Las Vegas, Nevada
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Male Dominant, 40, la jolla, California
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Male Submissive, 43
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Submissive Couple, 39, Forest Hills, New York
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Dominant Couple, 48, San Diego, California
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Male Dominant, 51
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Male Submissive, 34, las vegas, Nevada
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Male Dominant, 36
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Male Dominant, 49
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Female Submissive, 55
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Female Submissive, 37
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