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	Important note: I haven't checked the "Is seeking trans dom/sub" because I think making all trans folk (many of whom are binary-identified) check a third gender category is an awful-horrible-no-good thing to do. I play with women and non-binary people and men and anything else. What attracts me to a person is a fuzzy, hard-to-pin-down set of physical and emotional traits, and stupid exclusive ticky boxes are of no help in defining that. So there. The single best piece of advice I have ever received is this: Never turn your back on the ocean I was three, and cold and recently knocked-down. I had been standing in the shallows (bent-over and searching in the sand for buried gold -- one never knows) when a little wave had attacked me and smushed me into the sand. It was very scary, and there had been several moments when I could not see or breathe or tell which direction was up. My mother picked me up and wiped my eyes and told me the that sea could hurt you when it wanted, and that it could teach you if you listened. And she told me that you should never turn your eyes away from the sea, no matter how scared you got. It wouldn't save you from being knocked down, but it would give you the time to brace yourself. and you could learn things in the falling. Kink, for me, is the grown-up equivalent of not turning my back on the ocean. There are scary things inside of me, and they swell and slosh and sometimes crash in upon me. But I find that when I look at them steadily I come away much more myself then when I started. On a more concrete level, I'm a kinky queer girl with a serious hard-on for canes. And rope. And sex and genderqueer folks and women and OH LORD ANYTHING NIPPLE CLAMPS and flogging and eye contact restrictions and ritual and -- Ahem, yes. At the moment I'm looking for women and non-binary subs/switches more than men. I tend to sub only for high femmes, though this isn't a hard and fast rule. I'm in a serious (well, actually, pretty silly) long-term relationship with the gallant spockface. I'm only interested in play partners and mentors. And friends, of course! We do play as a couple, but only with women. See the first bit of this profile for my gender preferences.

If I see one more cliche, labored, *horrible* pun on, "I don't bite" on a collarme profile, I'm going to get my scythe.

I have discovered there are rabbis on CM. Fucking *rabbis*. My entire childhood is ruined. I bet every time my rabbi was up there telling stories and guiding us to light and love and shit like that, he was secretly hoping his mistress would unlock his chastity device. Thank you CM, you have officially made me claw my eyes out.

Do you know what sucks? Big-time, major-league, I'm-going-to-cry sucks? I mean, here on CollarMe? Yeah, yeah, I know, lots of shit. I know. Read the last two journals. But that's not strictly CM's fault. You know what is? The fact that, "trans" is a separate fucking gender category. You know how made of fail that is? Look, any trans folk out there feel free to whack me with a stick if I get this wrong, but I understand trans personship differently. As I comprehend it, most trans women identify as, you know, women. And trans men as men. They want to be treated like the gender they live. They want the pronouns, and name, and relationships that cis folks get without question. They should get all of that. All trans folk are not one gender. They're not a horrifying and rightly-segregated species. They're people. They're women. They're men. They want to find love, or sex, or friends. So, please, lets treat them as they ask to be treated. I'm not saying that we should just file every one away under neat-and-tidy, "female", and, "male" categories. Trans people should be able to indicate their status. They shouldn't *have* to. Make it a ticky-box system. You can check, "woman", and "trans". And, for that matter, "Bi-gendered", "Non-gendered", "genderqueer", and "None-of-your-goddamn-fucking-business-you-son-of-a-Republican" But that's a whole other journal.

May I offer a piece of advice, gentle reader? Yes, I am that cute. I am also sexy. However, if your initial message to me contains anything along the lines of, "Hey there gorgeous!" I will hunt you down, cut off your toes, cover said toes in chili powder, and then stick them up your ass. Just so you know. Calling me by a pet name implies connection, relationship, and mutual affection. If those things are not present, calling me, "cutie" is not adorable. It's not funny. It's not even a compliment. It's an indication that you are not respectful of boundaries and should be avoided. If male, it's a sign that your privilege is showing, hard. So please, just use my username.

Gents, let me tell you something. I don't care about your cock. I don't care that you're a Nice Guy. I don't give a fuck if you want me to, "give [you] a chance!" Seriously. Back the fuck off. Stop messaging me with misspelled boilerplate. You will receive the pointy end of the rhetorical stick. So if you're going to message me about how I should date/fuck/whatever you, instead of my lovely girlfriend, I sure hope you're a masochist. That is all.

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