sarisx

In ropes and chains I bound my slave, I asked her once if she dared to dream before I did the slightest thing answer me quickly girl or my whip will sing.

her eyes quivered the pang of respect or fear, but rather suspect, I found no tear.

her lips parted and there she gagged, this all started because of something I lacked, yet still I must procede, still I must not let her breath.

"I know my pet this falling, drifting hazy dream that my fingers wrapped upon your neck so quickly brings in torrents of muffled orgasmic screams."

and then I watched as my pet smiled for me...for me, even through her stifled ecstacy as I let her fade back to reality...

I caught her in my arms as she fell to eternity, breaking free the ropes and chains so easily, I opened her mouth to mine once again, to taste the sweet nectar of our sin and with our lips barely met, the breath of life, my promise kept...

My only regret is that I lacked the strength to stand up to you when you were wrong, and for that I must apologize with all of my soul, for the greatest tragedy I could ever have let fall upon you was the weakness I allowed in me. 

I forgive you the things you are, for you are blind to the truth and I did not bother to offer my hand to lift you up.

For that I am sorry.

I forgive you the things you do, for you are but a child still stumbling to find your way in this world that is all to overwhelming at times and I did not take the time to guide you through the darkest times.

For this I am sorry.

I forgive you for the things that you speak, for your tongue does not know any better way to communicate the pain that it must surely taste upon your bitter lips and my tolerance to your ways chained my own tongue to silence itself against your lies. 

For this I cannot apologize enough.

I forgive you for the things that you think, for society has programmed you to believe these evil ways and idea's and I did not offer you a path to something greater as surely I could have done.

For this...for this I have wronged you in ways I am sure you cannot understand, a wrong greater than any wrong you may have ever done unto me.  For this one thing my soul cries out in pain that I failed you in a way that no human should ever be failed.

I forgive you for the way you see this world and for the way you taught me to see it, for your eyes saw not the light and so you did not know that there was beauty, and life, and love in this world of such magnitude that it can bring even the darkest of men to his knee's in tears. 

For this I am sorry that I did not think to open your eyes to the light that I have seen, for surely then your soul could rest.

I forgive you all that you have done, for you were my guide and you did the best that you knew how being what you are. Now I have taken what you have shown me and put it to a use that is for the greater good.  You alone showed me all of the things that are wrong with this world, and for so long I hated you for this, for so very long I hated you for allowing this, for you were my strength and my light, and even as a child I knew that you could feel, deep inside to the very heart of your soul you felt that it was not right.

So for that, I must forgive your weakness, that you did as all other sheep do and followed the herd, you lacked the strength that it took to stand for something better, to search to fill the emptiness I am sure you must feel behind your medicated mind.

I must forgive you these things for I understand the nature of the beast that rages within you and though I could have protected you from it, I did not, for you could not protect me.

I began in this so long ago without any true sense of direction or purpose as to what I was attempting to achieve. 

I am very much an extremist, and in being an extremist to the level that only a true extremist can be, I attempted to go too far too fast. 

I place this reaction on the fact that without truelly knowing or having some idea of what it was that I sought to do, I went blindly in a rage to fill that emptiness I so strongly felt to the core of my soul.

I think now had I gone against my own nature as an extremist and taken the time to think about what it is that I wanted and needed I would have come to this point of understanding much sooner. 

But I am what I am and following any other way, though perhaps easier or shorter, would never have brought me so fully to the point that I am at now.  Perhaps I would have achieved this way of thinking as so many others have before me, but I highly doubt what the culpability of it would be. 

I am stronger because as an extremist I choose to endure the hardest of situations, I choose to place myself in them that I might fully take from the experience all that is to be taken, and hopefully the knowledge and insight I have taken from it may be used to give back to those I meet along the way.

~Damien~