Onesweetflsub4u

by a great friend told to me ...

Could you Be…A Wannabe One of the arrear of greatest concern to submissive is to attempting to determine whether a dominant that approaches them is real. These are some of the hints I offer for their consideration in determining how real a potential dominant might be. I suggest that you as a potential new dominant review this list with an honest self- examination in mind. If you see yourself even slightly described in any of these characteristic you owe it to yourself and to your potential future submissive to analyze what causes you to maintain these characteristic You are a Wannabe if 1. You demand to be addressed as Sir as a supposed signs of respect by any submissive, before even investing a modicum of time in getting to know the submissive. As a dominant you have no rights over submissive in general just because you are dominate. If you feel the need to have to demand an exhibition of respect from all who approach you, you may want to review the source of your own self-esteem and self-confidence. 2. If you feel it is imperative that a potential submissive receive information from no one but you regarding the vanities and aspects of this spectrum, you may want to focus on the reasons for not feeling that you are equal to out said comparisons. 3. If you feel that you have no responsibility for expressing your needs, wants, and desires as honestly, clearly and directly as possible to a potential submissive, could it be that you have not put in the necessary time required to know yourself and your own needs well enough> 4. If you insist on hearing what a potential submissive needs and desires are first with a view of adjusting your needs and desires to match hers, you may require a re-thinking of the essence of dominance and the measure of your own needs. 5. If you feel a need to rush into a relationship and get an immediate commitment of any sort from a submissive that you have barely gotten to know as a person. It would be advisable for you to determine why you require an immediate commitment. Keep in mind it is just as important for the submissive to know you both as a man and as a dominant as it is for you to know her both as a woman and as a submissive before making a commitment to you. 6. Insisting that the submissive travel to you at the time of your initial meeting as proof of her commitment to you may sound great in your fantasies but in the realities of this life it may well exhibit a measure of disregard for the emotional comfort and physical well-being of your potential submissive. Is she not worth the effort of your going to her, meeting her on her own home turf and maintaining a comfortable and familiar atmosphere in which you and she can come to know each other better? 7. If you as the dominant exhibit jealousy or feel hurt by inconsequential actions of your submissive for example her speaking with other dominant or even flirting with other dominant you are allowing insecurities in both yourself and in your potential relationship. Keep in mind those insecurities may prove quite as detrimental to a budding relationship as they would be to an established relationship. 8. If you feel that a submissive any submissive must obey your every command then you lack a fundamental understanding of dominance. No submissive owes you immediate obedience just because she is submissive, nor for that matter is blind immediate obedience to all and Sunday an indicator of a level submissive ie whether the submissive is submissive enough. 9. Your view of a dominant character may include maintaining an aspect of stoicism.. trying to be the strong silent type. This characteristic may seem on the surface as indicating solidity and strength, but if carried too far it may become a very real barrier in establishing the free and easy flow of communication that is essential to this type of relationship. If it requires an immense constant effort on your potential submissive part to drag information from you about yourself your past your requirements and needs you may be in the process of establishing future blocks to communication. If your submissive feels that it will be a production to get any type of answer from you will she be able to establish towards you the level of trust and openness you will require. Keep in mind always the fundamentals of this type of relationship must be a two way street. 10. One of the most common misconceptions of new dominants is the thinking that a submissive does not have the right to question a potential Master. Communication and trust are the most important building blocks that will uphold your relationship. Prohibiting even a potential submissive from questioning you as a man and as a dominant will only establish strong barriers to possible trust. Question from each side of the developing partnership are the only concrete manner for both potential porters to get to know each other as people. Exhibiting a desire for secrecy even under the vanilla guise of maintaining that so called mystery does not apply in the process of establishing a potential relationship Or are you…A Dominant In contrast to the possibly negative view of a potential new dominant, I offer the following as what I consider to be fundamental characteristics of a dominant. It is important to remember that the characteristics of the dominant are based in and created by the characteristics of the man. A dominant is one who has the understanding that he is not perfect ( nope sort fellas were not) A dominant has taken the time to accept his flaws as an individual, has come to terms with them, and determined how best to control and deal with them effectively. A dominant has come to realize that proof of his dominant does not come from the person who calls him Master but rather from within himself, by dint of his personality, his ethics, standards and values, combined with his particular needs within this spectrum. A dominant has realized that he has the responsibility to himself to inform himself as thoroughly as possible regarding the wide ranging aspects of the BDSM spectrum. He will have taken the time to consider for himself what his own needs are within each aspect and will be fully capable of clearly articulating those needs to a potential submissive. Life experience will have taught him the importance of trust and respect in any relationship, and he will have come to recognize that a woman will only be able to submit to a man with character, making him worthy of her trust and respect. A dominant man will understand and accept that before expecting a submissive to give over control of herself and her life, he must first have complete control over himself and his life. Even though it is somewhat a given in some circles of the BDSM spectrum that a Master is free to have a multiplicity of sub/slaves, understand that most women wish for an exclusive relationship where she is exclusive to her Master, as he is to her. If the original commitment with your sub/slave calls for exclusivity from you both, you have the responsibility as a dominant to be up front, direct and honest should you decide to include others in your relationship on any level? Realize that taking responsibility for honesty in your needs makes you stronger as a dominant, not weaker. Understand the value of character in most old-fashioned sense, if you will. Understand and take responsibility for the fact that you must have within your character and your actions the proof of your worthiness of the submissive trust and respect. Understand that the value of your submissive will not only be based in the level of her submissiveness to you, but also in herself, as an individual, the whole person. She will be intelligent, have a mind of her own and will be eager to use all her abilities to your mutual advantage, if the environment is conducive to such. As a dominant man you understand that being dominant is merely who and what you are. Your dominance is such that it need not be constantly and actively demonstrated but because it comes from within, your dominance will be readily apparent through your self-control and your responsible action. A dominant man will understand that words such as integrity, character, honestly, fairness and consistency represent concepts that are apparent throughout all areas of a dominant life. They are not mere words to be used and applied selectively when they may be to your advantage. Not only are those words representative of the character of a man they are hallmarks of the character of a dominant man, and imperative in one who would be called a Master. WHERE DO YOU FIT…DOMINANT OR WANNABE?

Too many Dominant think there God gift to women, no one need to hear that or want to hear it. You have ample opportunities to show who you are, and ample opportunities to make a fool of your self. Don’t set your self up for failure, the real you will show through in seine. Remember till she submit you have no rights to order her around, give her time to get to know you and what you like. Similarly, strength and gentleness go hand and hand. Finesse and subtlety are major elements of Dominance. Be open minded you may be considered the teacher, but you can learn a lot from her. Remember there a fine line between sensitive caring Dominant and a self- righteous insensitive overbearing clod.

wow so i am going to vent alittle.. So the man  i was with almost two years, actually text me a link to a meeting people datng site... Ummmm really ? ! Yes I am on here to meet ones LIKE ME.. Not some more not in the scene ( think they are) men who really do not know what the hell they talking or doing. I tried the normal life and it isn't for me. I love sex, need it , want it, but at the same time have no issues on meeting men and getting cock if i choose. I am just ole fashion and don't believe on jumping on anything with three legs .... anyways...... i texted him back telling him thanks but no thanks i don't need  xxx.date, xxx blackbook, badoo, or skout to meet anyone  and said Bye .   lol  Wtf was this man thinking......

Many e-mails within a day. Let me just say im quit happy of all the responses.First ty for your interest. Bur let me say a few things. First, I am not looking for a fly by night thing. Second, sending and asking for nude pics won't get you far with me.Although sex is important in a relationship, it isn't everthing ,and for long term I don't feel should always be first thing to talk about. https://www.collarspace.com/js/tiny_mce/plugins/emotions/img/smiley-kiss.gif" alt="Kiss" border="0" />