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I realized recently that I have a proclivity for domination. It is a part of me that I am learning about, growing and nurturing. Right now, I find my style of domination to be much informed by what I would want in bottoming. I am a sensual person, and my style of domination is just that. I want to tease and tantalize. I want to engage all five senses as many ways as I can. I want to vary the type and intensity of whatever stimulation I am giving. I want to put my sub into a place where wonderful and strong sensations are coming from all directions.
I have a talent for domination, but I have a desire for submission. Getting me into a truly sub space has proven to be difficult. Many of my fetishes and desires revolve around strong and nurturing women. My problem is that I have a brain that likes to analyze, re-analyze and then meta-analyze everything that happens, usually in real time, and often with ADD style detours into details wholly irrelevant (stupid brain). Taking it offline, or at least putting it into a place where the only thing it can cope with is the NOW, would be a sine qua non of dominating me, I think.
One point I seem to always come back to is communication. Without open and honest communication, none of "that thing we do" will work. This is true of ones wants and desires, but is equally true of one's emotions and emotional state. An injured soul/psyche/heart is one of those things that must be carefully considered, as much as an injured back or leg, if not more so. This goes both ways, as well. A dom who is hurting in any way must let his sub know. It's simple, people: talk to each other. If you are willing to let someone put clamps on your nipples or toy with your cock, then perhaps being reticent about that bum ankle or the fact that your crush at the office has started dating your boss might be worth sharing as well. I'm not sure TMI can apply in a D/s situation. |
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