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Looking for cute little girl to amuse me until I get back to Daddy.
I'm very much a switch, I love both sides of the coin. While I found one half I'm still yearning for a chewtoy to amuse me, a good little pet to play with, poke, torment and torture.
I just decided to go back to school full time (I already have a BA I'm specializing in a different field now.) It gives me more free time then I've had in years. I haven't really spent any time in the New England kink community during the 2 years I've been here but was very active back home in Seattle. My life is extensive beyond kink. Being friends with someone I'm involved with in a kink way is important.
BDSM is not about sex and orgasms for me. Sexual yes, hot, gets my juices flowing, blood pumping, but what I love the most is the head space. I want the emotional orgasms, not the physical ones.
I'm a reasonably experienced top, and have been lucky enough to have two wonderful who helped mentor me. One my former top who I still adore, and the other a profession Domme.
I tend to bottom more then I submit, (see my journal for the difference) mostly because I haven't had a chance to develop a connection with any one that was deep enough to move in that direction. I certainly would be open to exploring that possibility.
I've spent much more time topping, but then again it's easier to find submissive then it is to find a good Top.
As a submissive goes I'm interested in a few things, a service submissive, A pain slut or at least someone who enjoys suffering for my pleasure. Humilation is always a plus, but I'm open to other things. I've had plenty of newbies under my wing and help them grow.
My favorite items are canes and straps (as in thick peices of leather) to play with. I am with out a doubt a sadist but I draw the line at long term scars, and blood letting.
I love protocol and rituals. Eye restriction, voice restriction, rules, and the like are all very yummy.
I'm interested in a few different things, one is just to meet local folks (so if you are not in New England or more then 2 hrs away from me, I probably won't be interested) the other is to a solid play partner, a partner in crime. Oh and I'm not poly at least not with sex. I'm not looking for a chat buddy, rather real time interaction.
If you'd like to send me a gift feel free to look at https://secure.stockroom.com/wishlist/wishlistShared.aspx?sharedWishlistcode=5694783
(If you message me please send a picture if you don't have one posted, I post my picture so people know who they are talking to, I expect then same respect and courtesy in return. Also I will not relocate, even if you are prince charming, I'm in the middle of school right now and that comes first. Also if you are a couple or over the age of 47 your message will go to my bulk mail box.) |
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Well I'm back in the states. I went from 80+ degrees to a windchill factor of zero or below. I smile every time I think of my trip, hopefully it will get me through the winter. Tomorrow a trip to the tanning salon just so I can have the illusion of being warm...
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I'm always slightly befuddled by people who list themselves as dominate but then approach me on both levels. I like switching but when I switch with someone who tops me, I feel more and more like a service top, rather then a Domme. I don't mind the role of an educator, I think it's part of my responsibility as an active community kink person. However I dislike switching with the same person. I think because I've found that it is seldom Doms who like to sub, but rather submissives who can top once and a while. I can't say that I blame them, I adore topping the right people, but I'm more likely to crave the other side of the whip. I find the more people submit the more then are likely to want to stay in that role....
And I always end up topping.
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Ah well it's 12:30 am in belize and I can not sleep. A shame that I took such a long nap, because it isn't rather safe for me to go wandering alone at this hour. So here I sit on our porch, watching the stars and listening to the water.
I'm pondering making another profile, setting this one to Dom, and the other one to submissive. I think sometimes being a switch complicates things, more so on finding a dom then finding submissives. Of course who wants a Dom who would be scared of having a switch as a playmate....
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You only have one chance to make a first impression. I am surprised by how many people don't realize this fact. It is very hard to make a second impression after all. I can always tell if someone has read my profile or not, and more important if they understood it. If someone can't tell what I am looking for they are clearly not what I am looking for.
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A recent conversation made me once again think about my definitions of bottom, Top, Domination and submission. For me there is a difference, but I realize it isn't the same for every one else. When you are talking to some one else it is always helpful if you have the same understanding of the language. None of these are complete definitions and with in a scene it is possible that I would go from being one mind set to another. More likely to go from bottoming to submitting, from topping to dominating then the other way around.
Bottoming: Bottoming for me is less sexual then submission. I'm much more present, awake and aware. My trust level doesn't need to be as high. It's much more about S/m for me then it is about D/s. I have much more control, and no qualms about stopping things. My ability to take pain is much more about me, and comes from own desire. I'm much more about sensation and testing myself. Forced play is not out of the question here, but I will fight back. While pain can be arousing it isn't as often. I'd say here my cunt is pretty much off limits. I get actually really pissy when people go for my cunt, I never figured out why but it's certainly in my brain. I consider someone I'm just causally playing with to be bottoming to me rather then submitting to me. Its much more S/m for me then D/s.
Submitting: Submission is a different cup of tea. I'm less in my own head, I often feel like part of my brain turns off or goes to sleep. I have to have a higher level of trust. I often feel like I'm under a blanket of fuzzy, the world slows down. I can fight my way out of it (though I try to avoid doing this because if it I fight it is harder to get back into the headspace again.) It's a little more sexual then bottoming is, and more sexual play works in that area. I'm much more likely to suffer, and do things for the other person that I may not like. This tends go beyond just the basic S/m. The over all physical feelings is very different for me. I look for that same difference in other people, for example I like making my pet feel small, when he does I know that he's in a submissive headspace rather then just bottoming.
Topping: Like bottoming Topping for me is much more about letting my sadist out to play. Lots of wacking, much less sexuality about it. More responsibility is placed on the bottom to give me feedback and to take care of themselves. If I'm bottoming, the person is topping me, no matter what they might want to think they are doing.
Domination: Dominating is a larger package, it's the flip of submission after all. I'm much more interested in my own needs, but I'm also much more aware of the other person, where they are at, and what I need to do to help them dance to my music. If I'm submitting there has to be good chemistry, an understanding of trust, and so forth. |
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