| |
|
|
Home |
|
|
|
|
Browse |
|
|
|
|
|
Live |
|
|
|
|
Join |
|
Collarspace |
|
|
|
|
Dating |
|
|
|
|
News |
|
|
|
|
Mobile |
|
|
|
|
Alt |
|
|
|
|
Safety |
|
|
|
|
Toys |
|
|
|
|
Friends |
|
|
|
|
Resources |
|
|
|
|
Welcome |
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Login |
|
|
 |
|
 |
|
|
| |
|
| |
| |
|
|  | |
|
|
|
|
|
| |
We are a poly couple…
He (bkidd = Husband/Domliness) is Not Bi.
I am slightly bi-curious.
We are looking for Both a male and female. The female is the only one that has to be submissive. (Yes I think I just broke the unspoken Uber Doms rules with that statement…. Nope, no lightening struck me..)
****
You must live in Nigeria against your will and need us to send you money ASAP through Western Union so you can serve us in the warship position (I spelled that correctly. I’ve seen it on several other profiles and really am curious how the warship position works… I mean does it involve fighter planes or something?)
You must state that you are “real and not a player” on your profile in the first paragraph. Then completely contradict yourself in the second paragraph.
You must not use any periods in your whole profile because I’m supposed to be a mind reader and know when you are done with one statement and have moved to the next this is not confusing for anyone but while you can forgo the periods you still have to be an excellent speller like a total spelling bee champion
You shouldn’t read my profile. Not a word. Just email me. Something with barely a sentence. Preferably a statement. Then get mad when I don’t reply to a statement. Or tell me how stressed you are and how no one wants to listen to you and how I probably won’t listen to you.
You should be completely hung up on sex and titles. I mean that is what this is all about right?? “Me Master. Me want sex now. You slave. You…stop laughing”.
****
Is anyone out there still reading this??
Somehow I think I can hear the sound of crickets coming from the internet. Just in case someone out there is somehow still reading this I’ll continue…
Everything above the first *** is true. We are Poly and looking for a male and female to Join us. NOT to casually play, swing, cyber, ect ect…. But actually eventually join us as in live under the same roof, family oriented and such.
I do not have this profile listed as a couple for the primary reason that I am searching for someone for myself. As my Husband does his own search for himself. I do switch back and forth between 'I' and 'We' a lot, I'm not really gonna appologize for that. I still list what my Husband is searching for incase a female subby decides she'd like to email either of us. Either way this is my profile, for me.
We don’t do “forced” anything. Kinda defeats the point doesn’t it? So no, he’s not going to force me to be bi for you or the other way around.
We have 2 kids whom we are very protective of. Plus two cats. One who thinks she is in charge. The other thinks he’s superman/spider man all rolled into one. There will not be anything near illegal activity involving any of them. Trust me , you’ll wish I called the cops first.
I am a (I hate this term) bbw. It’s fine if you don’t like it. But when that changes go ahead and pass me by anyways.
What are we looking for???
The winning lotto ticket… I guess you have to play to win though..
Honesty, Communication and friendship first. We are looking for a long term relationship(s) that aren’t based on sex (Look sex is freaking awesome but if that’s it, then it’s not worth it).
I don’t care who you are but sense of humor sends you to the top of the list.
Couples are more than welcome to message.
We have no problem if you have kids too.
Drama free!
Be able to laugh at yourself.
D&D free. No habitual smokers. We do smoke (electronic cigarettes, swishers, ect) every once in a while and that is fine if you do too.
It doesn’t matter if your ‘relationship’ is with me or my Husband you have to get along with both of us (no you don't have to date both of us).
Males… I’ll be upfront I prefer more Dominant personalities (hence the submissiveness). Primarely (and more realistically) I'm looking for more of a vanilla relationship with someone with a Dominant personality (willing to consider switch personalities). If it works out in a non-vanilla way that would be awesome, but I'm not holding my breath. I am looking for a real relationship, no one nighters. Must be good around kids (if you last long enough to meet them your doing good. They are a big part of our lives). Sense of humor, second ammendment supporters and meat eaters prefered. If you send me a picture of a penis or have one as your main profile picture I will assume that’s the kind of person that I will be talking to. So to put it bluntly, I don’t talk to dicks. (Do I get brownie points for sneaking in a penis joke on my profile??)
Female sub/slave. Must like and be good with kids. very important. Age is also not an issue but maturity is. You don’t have to be experienced. Your hard limits will be respected. You will be expected to pitch in and help just like everyone else in the house.
To answer an often asked question. My Husband has been poly for round about 15 years (yes he did have to look confused and use his fingers to attempt to count this). He told me when we met that he was poly. He also said it would never be forced on me and it would be my decision if we were to ever be actively poly. At that moment in my life I was not ready but I did read about it (the good and the bad). I read forums and continued learning as our relationship grew. I finally came to the point to where I was ready about a few years ago. I told my Husband, then wondered if he was going to start breathing and hoped he didn’t just pee himself. Apparently it was one of those ‘out of the blue’ announcements.
More about us..
I am 28. If it matters I’m a leo. I do happen to open up more when I type than when having a conversation face to face. If I don’t feel like you are actually interested in talking to me I will lose interest in talking with you very quickly. I am also an introvert (look up 'Introvert Advantage' if you are unsure of what that means). It's not a bad thing at all, it's just me.
My Husband (again bkidd) is 36. Again, if it matters he is a sagittarius. He not only wears Hawaiian shirts and flip flops but is one of the very few people I know who pulls it off and manages to look all manly and cool at the same time. ** Ok, he's laid off the Hawiian shirt lately, but he still rocks the flip flops.
We are real people, you know with flaws and things. I will not write you a book about being perfect and rich. We have kids and we work. This ='s after a standard week we consider giving each other a lobotomy for some piece of mind.. I would say quiet but I'm sure a lobotomy would remove any care I ever had about things being quiet.
We pretty much work under a self employed status and have a kick ass charity group we are pretty involved in also.
We do not go out and party on a regular basis. We are very laid back (when kids and work allows). I am quiet (See Introvert above ^). For some reason I've noticed that people are put off by this. Me being quiet does not mean I'm plotting to take over the world. It's just me. He is not quiet. He talks a lot...and then some more...and some more. Sometimes I could use a referee whistle to get a word in. He does most of the cooking. >>Correction: I do most of the cooking as schedules have all but flipped around in the past year.<< Let’s face it he's more creative and doesn't turn hamburgers into hockey pucks (I'm getting better at not making hockey pucks!). Instead I tend to stick to baking. That I am good at. Yes there is a difference between the two. And yes you may possibly get really fat off my baking, so I bake in moderation now.
You will rarely see me on my knees. Let me redirect you to the "we have kids". .
You will rarely hear me call him Master (There are a few required times but..).. because I can't usually do that with a straight face (Flash backs to Igor in Young Frankenstein). I know who's typically in charge and so does he...*ahem* the kids..
I guess this is the part where I say no fakes, flakes, players or spammers. But really everyone has their own definition of who is real and who they believe to be a “player” (includes me). Spammers are going to email regardless of what you write here. Fakes and flakes are annoying yes but usually (I said usually) easy to spot when you’ve been around a time or two. If for some reason while we are talking/exchanging pictures and you decide that we aren’t for you then just say so. I hate wasting my time as much as you hate wasting yours.
We aren't in any rush, you will not be moving in next week. We have no interest in talking on the internet for a year either. Real life is the goal here. I usually prefer a two week email exchange. And if we haven't scared the crap out of each other by the end of said two weeks then phone number exchanges and setting up a meeting is the next step in my mind. I'm sure I will be changing this profile as I go. Feel free to ask either of us questions. |
|
|
|
|
Updated some of the profile, because things were sagging and all droopy and stuff. |
| |
| |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
