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Maintenance Beating
There has been an on going discussion about maintenance beating. Generally, I adhere to the idea of that in order to keep the slave's mind right.
Of course, regular maintenance beatings are seperate and apart from punishements that may have been earned by the slave.
Certainly, when intially entering My service daily maintenance beatings are necessary to promote acculturation. Service to Me requires a greatly reduced ego in the slave. That energy that was once selfe centered in the slave must be redirected to My benefit.
Thing is, the slave that I desire wants exactly the same thing. However, not infrequently its social adjustments have included messages about itself that contradict its inborn nature and it lives in conflict. To the degree that conflict is resolved to that degree it finds peace and fullfilment.
There is the issue of pain sluts. These masochists crave punishment. With this type I do have alternate means of ego right sizing.
On an ongoing basis maintenance beatings will most likely be the rule in My house. The frequency and intensity of the beating will be tailored to My desires, not the slaves. What seems like a lifetime ago, I was getting ready to transfer colleges. I took a trip to the new one with my aunt and grandmother. We walked the campus, drove around the area, grabbed lunch, and did a little shopping. We went to this cute little gift store across the bridge and I remember seeing a suncatcher I really liked. It was maybe 6 or 8 inches across, with a blue sky and two peaches below. It read something like, Kisses are like peaches, the longer you wait, the sweeter they are. I wanted that suncatcher. But I also wanted to buy a daisy frame for my aunt as a thank you. Daisies were her favorite flowers. Being a poor college student I couldn't afford both. I bought the frame thinking when I matriculated I could come back for the suncatcher. And I did, but it was gone. I still think about it. Whenever I see a display of suncatchers I always look. I know I won't find it again, but I always look. Having spoken to you for a few weeks now, we understand each other. Our face to face meeting is at hand.
I know what motivates your need to serve and please your man. In the vanilla world, you have confidence - or at least a veneer of confidence you maintain - but internally you feel yourself unsure, uncertain and that sometimes you just want to run away. I pick you up, dust you down with warm encouraging words, embracing you as you feel the strength of me and know I give you care and comfort.
I know you. I know your thoughts, I know your experiences and I know what you need from me. I know your hard limits and the agreed safe signals.
We share a strong connection already. We have an emotional bond and an excitement between us as we plan to become a unity, planning our homelife and talking about our values of partnership and family together.
I value your intelligence, your feminine elegance and your utter submission to me, only me. Your devotion, loyalty and eagerness to please whilst still maintaining your vanilla pride and confidence - I respect that and appreciate those qualities.
You enjoy the guidance I give you, my mentoring, the boundaries that I give you and my affection.
Soon, you will arrive. We have discussed this many times. We know what to expect of each other, and yet, there is still that excitement.
I hear footsteps approach my front door ... I am not a slave master and not interested in slaves. Read my profile again. I am not here to please you and your desires. Once again, read my profile.
Examples of pro Domme services:Asking if I like pegging or doing anything to your penis or butthole. I don't know you sir. Why would I want to do anything for you?Asking to be used or femininzed. Not sure how I can use someone I don't know. People charge for feminization services, find a pro.
Also, dudes with the oneliners for intros, blocked! Save those for your vanilla interactions. Competition is steep out here. Good luck or F*ck off! Either way, I don't care. Block my profile now if you don't like it.
How can a str8 male fall in love with his Bull? This is a question that always calls my attention but lately it has become a surprising reality. For a Bull to pursue and obliterate any idea of str8 identity on a self proclaimed heterosexual male is a la or or of love. The Bull knows that this identity is misplaced but to convince the other male of this requires a deep knowledge of the male psyque. Our society has done much of the work for us, str8 males (I said it before) admire sports figures to the edge of homoerotism. But of course that's admiration and it stops there. These males will follow a strong male to hell and back and allow any sort of intimacy with the leader of the band, actually they crave it. When they finally come to me I know there's a need a need that eventually could turn into love and that is a great feeling. However if one finds a male that is slowly falling in love not only giving you ownership of their bodies but also their feelings; that's a sacred charter that cannot be underestimated. Why? Because that male is into you and your dealings with him you are a model they can submit and surrender to. In short, you've found a male bride and you must nurture that male and his feelings. For the str8 male to acknowledge such feelings is confusing because is attraction, lust, respect, and the acknowledgement that he has fallen in love with the man and his phallus; but most of all the character and security it brings to his life. He is now realizing that the best place to be is anywhere his Man places him: between his legs, under him, or on his back awaiting the entry of the phallus that will change his life forever.
As a Bull you know he is yours
anyway you want that however, to the outside only him will feel your power and control. Even if he goes back to women which is an option if they still want to claim his str8 persona, he will mount them imitating you and doing it for you. I had the pleasure of a baby named after me, and that’s the ultimate surender. It is his baby, now a teen, but every time he calls him he calls me. A male who loves you is a treasure to be had and a partner to nurture and possess beyond the physical. Many messages- let's addres and be clear and concise.
So many have this aversion to Dominants who are interested in transactional ects of this lifestyle and so many have been taken advantage of, hurt, scammed. I am so sorry you've put yourself in such position, except- own it and wear a helmet. If youre that desperate but only wish to live bi-curiously through your online persona, behind the security of a screen and your cowardice; please do not judge and condemn those of Us who truly are committed to who We are as dominants.
This may not be the absolute truth, it is simply My experience in over fifteen years in this particular site, lifestyle and walking in My truth and acceptance as a Dominant Woman, you seek leadership, direction, guidance, for someone else to take the responsability (often times, the burden) of where you are and guide you to be the best you can be, to serve Us. Power exchange is not, at least for Me, a kink. It is My identity, in every ect and area of of My life. So, approach with humility, accountabilit and honesty to your own self, to who and what you say you are. Do not, however, message me with aimless superficial comments, idle or vain conversation or the worst- requests as though you are pulling up a drive thru window topping from the bottom making requests and commands.
Infinite question?-" How does one earn a spot at Goddes' feet?"
Through committed, consistent actions. Bdsm aside, that’s how a man, woman( however it is you identify as)who knows who he/she is/ they are, what he/she/they is/are doing, what his/her/their purpose is and what he/she is /they are willing to be or become to get it knows the price for anything is actions for it speaks of who he/she is they are, his/her character and value. Values are simply what W/we value most above all else. Values are Priorities. The higher the priorities, higher the standard- My standards.
The higher the price paid in any power exchange is and will always be submission and sacrifice of who you are through your actions, not words. sacrifice of your time, commitment and honest and consistent actions and communication. That in itself is money, is the kind of money, finances, many here do not have because as subs or slaves the are simply not it or are not at the level I and many dominants deserve. All is well, so lukewarm and flakes or those who revel in nice ideas and words but are not in a covenant and commitment towards who they are. Many are not even aware they are required and must take ownership of their identity. Who it is you, as a sub or slave, at best are mediocre, and at worst are cowards. so they’re filtered away by their limitations and mediocrity. Many of you discarded and ignored to continue to repeat the same level, course, process, lessons over and over and over because you are completely comfortable in your discomfort, victim hood and mediocrity whilst continue to complain why you are where you are, why you suffer, for you do not see that is you who limits yourself.
Without said self revelation and acceptance, there cannot be space for the discipline and obedience to your own self as a submissive, slave. Taking ownership, accountability and responsibility of this self awareness is to be committed and loyal to who it is you are at your core and pay whatever price necessary; whether it is parts of yourself, to be transformed, upgraded, or simply let go and let die so your true self can be liberated through deed. This is one very finite answer to what I mean by “earn a spot at Goddess’ feet”- at any dominants feet quite frankly.
We are what W/we give and in return what W/we are and give is also what is returned to U/us ten fold. To serve is a privilege that requires sacrifice and courage, to give is also to receive. Both are one and the same. For Me? This is the standards I adhere and live by- so whatever is done for Me I know is the minimum for I know who and what as a sub or slave with trust, committed actions and guidance My subs have flourished and transformed into their own personal and professional lives. Task #1
I was tasked to do an extreme outdoor date. I was to walk to my local beach naked after dark. Once there I was to lock a short hobble chain between my ankles. Then I slipped on a leather blindfold. Next I locked my hands behind my back using a 2hr ice timer. I was in an open area with no where to hide. I'm naked, hobbled, blindfolded and hands cuffed behind my back. I was stuck out in the open for 2 vulnerable hours. I was scared, excited and extremely horny. Anybody could have used me to their hearts content but sadly nobody did. I will definitely do this task again. I read over my profile, again, today, as I have many times since I created it anew.
I've tried very hard over the years to make my profile on FL be realistic, vulnerable, intelligent, reflective of who and what I am at my core, and just as importantly, to have it reflect what I want to have in my life. To let it give someone who doesn't know me, either well or even at all, a solid idea of myself, my body, my mind, my soul.
The more I looked over it these last few months, the more I often changed it, inserting more intellectual references and suave self assured witticisms, but still I saw what it lacked.
The more I saw and felt the only true and right and beloved deion it could and should contain was...love.
The joy of caring, the elation of sexual union, deep and abiding compassion, the sensual act of touch, the smell and taste and sounds of affection, the respect of intimate and unflagging positive human regard, the vision of altruism, the singular romance of knowing you are and you can and you do and you need and you give that one precious wonderful thing that we all need in our lives; love.
It often seems to me in our kinky little corner of the universe there isn't much talk of that kind of love in profiles anymore, even though it also can take many shapes and forms; love of rope, love of play, love of sexual adventures. I hope we all will list more love and loves in our profiles. It's never too late. I'm not going to change my profile again though, please don't worry.
Let this note stand from this day forward as my more than official confirmation of my own proclamation to need want desire make spread create admire demonstrate dream bring deliver give ask understand and embrace more...
LOVE.
I was blocked because collarspace has a messed up sense of time.
Saying because the site was saying it was 30 minutes but it was 9 hours.
I do not play childish games and if you are so uptight you cannot simply ask me WTF then why so be it
I guess some people get all bent before finding out what is really going on..
Blocked me lol WOW
Calming vibes your way.
It may have taken nearly two years but the world is back and so am I.
Very excited to meet you!
Let's chat.
Male energy.
It may not look like it but my sub gives off male energy. Maybe it's because as a personal trainer she has to have a sense of command over her clients. She sometimes has to motivate them to push themselves during a workout.
In the beginning of our relationship it was working great. As part of my job I met a lot of wealthy people and when they saw how fit I am the conversation would sometimes shift and they would ask me, "How do you stay so fit?". So I'd tell them about my personal trainer and hand them her card. I wouldn't mention that she was my sub wife of course. They'd contact her and she'd train them. Sometimes she would travel to their homes and work out there. It was interesting and fun watching this woman push clients to their limits.
She's the same way with me at home. Our workouts together are hard and the results are amazing. Even as my sub, her make demeanor helps me to push harder and I love that about her.
Our girlfriend came over for a pool day. All three of us were at an art festival and we decided not to waste such a beautiful day by cutting it short and hitting the pool for some sunbathing. My sub was outside with our friend setting things up and I smiled as I watched her through the sliding glass door. She set up three lounge chairs next to each other but made sure she was in the middle and we were on either side of her.
She does this because she doesn't want our friend too close to me when we sunbathe. Again, that make energy protecting me from any potential glances or touching. As a gay woman who chose me as her soulmate I allow her this behavior. As her dominant, I encourage her jealous nature. It'll come handy one day. As required by my Dom, I publicly declare the following: I am subMeghan, and as I type this this, I am completely nude, except for my dog collar and glasses…
Today’s Journal Topic Is: Why The Fuck Haven’t I Posted Any More Journal Updates!
I actually get this question a lot. Unfortunately, that’s part of the problem. Apparently, you guys are actually reading my journals! And why, pray tell, is that a bad thing? Well, I’m going to tell you…
When I first started journaling here, I wrote as if I was speaking into the void. I wasn’t writing for an audience, rather I was writing merely for the sake of publicly letting my inner thoughts leave my body and go forth into the vast e-universe. I thought I was just a “voice in the wilderness” to be lost in the chasm of anonymity.
It was a stream of consciousness, a flow of thoughts. It was kinda like talking outloud to yourself, not thinking anyone was listening.
However… that was not the case... You were listening. And now you all had access to the part of my psyche that I kept hidden away, kept in the shadows, away from “polite” society. And worse yet… You had questions!
I had mistakenly thought that CS was just another fetish website that was here today, and then be gone tomorrow like so many other sites. Boy, was I wrong. LOL
I stopped writing because I became very self-conscious. VERY self-conscious. I quickly ran away from the spotlight as soon as I felt it’s light upon my exposed soul. Who the hell am I to have the audacity to think I have anything of substance to say to a listening world?
I have never liked being the center of attention. I am a wallflower, the kind of gal that always stands at the edges of a crowd. I am quiet, reserved, and passive. I am a watcher, an observer - not a performer. And certainly not, heaven forbid, an extrovert!
Over time, I’ve been able to reflect. I’ve decided to start posting again. I suspect the tone of my journal entries will change, much like Schrodinger's cat, now that I am aware that I’m being watched. We’ll see. I will let this journal entry be the start of a new chapter in subMeghan’s ongoing adventure.
Here’s to the journey!
subMeghan
God this site sucks trying to update anything. Once you do it takes months for them to approve it and you can't do a damned thing until they do, no viewing people, contacting them..NOTHING. so ****UPDATE**** I am a married Master/Dom looking for slaves for a 24/7 live in. I/we arer looking for female bi or pan slaves, and now have also decided to look for a coulpe as that opens so much more possibilities. The slaves would serve 24/7 and have strict protocols and rules to follow. I always find female dominatrix BDSM boring....
Well, to be honest, I find female dominatrix BDSM boring. I mean, don't get me wrong, I can see why some people might enjoy it(not me), but it's just not my thing even to talk or suggest. For one, for what I can see and feel very repetitive against males and paranoid .we males especially straight heterosexual are target by other genders as maniacs, perverts and worse not trustable which i always find very offensive even if there are many idiots doesn't mean we all the same but further more is the attitude of others gender want hunting down straight heterosexual males;in my life i never done anything not consensual . It's like everyone is following a predetermined set of rules towards males just to get credentials and reputations , which doesn't leave a lot of room for creativity or spontaneity.
Another thing that turns me off is the extreme nature of want to show their supremacy (when, how and with who) .
Overall, I think it's important for everyone to figure out what they like and what they don't like in their BDSM experiences.
Furthermore, I think that the stigma around male sexuality and the perception of men as potential perpetrators of sexual violence is untrue as not everybody are! As a straight heterosexual male, I feel that I am often unfairly targeted as a potential maniac or pervert, which I find offensive. The idea that there is a generation of women who want to hunt down straight heterosexual males is deeply offended me, especially as I have never engaged in any non-consensual behaviour in my life.
I want to be clear...here are my hard limits...
Kids
Animals
Choking
Guns
Orgies/Gangbangs
Swinger type events. I am into the power exchange not group sex
Cuckold
Scat
Serious Public Humiliation/ Sarcasm/ Degradation/ and/or blackmail
Diapers
Pacifers
Bottles
Dont ever call me mom or mommy
Age Play
Animal Play, no pony or puppy role play either ( can be done at very infrequent times but not for all the time)
Sissy play (some femme is ok)
Needle Play
Tattoos /brands, unless you are collared I won’t tattoo you ... and even then I probably won't.
Blood Play
Illegal Drugs and many legal ones
Smoking/smoke
Untruthfulness
Ass to mouth. I will not take things from your ass and expect you to put them in your mouth
Death play
Vomit
Occultism
Paranormal things
Vampirism
Poppers or drugs == Results from bdsmtest.org ==
100% Submissive
96% Slave
87% Degradee
82% Experimentalist
77% Brat
71% Masochist
64% Rope bunny
62% Primal (Prey)
49% Pet
42% Non-monogamist
41% Voyeur
39% Exhibitionist
34% Vanilla
31% Dominant
26% Brat tamer
8% Sadist
7% Owner
6% Master/Mistress
5% Primal (Hunter)
4% Rigger
2% Degrader
0% Switch
0% Boy/Girl
0% Daddy/Mommy
0% Ageplayer
So the world is rapidly changing for me and us. We are leaving Florida and relocating to southern Oregon in the coming month or two. As is often the case with big changes some of the issues behind it have been discussed and worked through but the final push seems to have been just a coincidence and offer of an extraordinary work opportunity. I don't know hardly anyone in Oregon but I'm sure we'll meet wonderful open minded and liberal people there once we settle in. We have lots to get done here before leaving and just driving across country with 2 Great Danes and 3 bossy black cats will be a challenge. We're still looking to add the right person or two to form a small bdsm focused poly family so if that's something you can relate to and Oregon sounds more inviting than SW Florida feel free to write and let me know.... Hello :) I have been sick this last week with Covid. I'm finallly getting better but still sneezing alottt but I'm getting better and am soooo thankful for that. I've been feeling very little this last week. wishing I had someone to take care of me a bit. Someday maybe that will happen for me but right now it's just me! I'm glad I can start getting back to normal this week and go back to work. I feel Like I've lost a week of my life truly I have just slept for a week and ate saltine crackers because I haven't been able to taste anything lol. I'm miss writing on here, my old profile had many pages of my writing but I've lost all of that unfortunately. maybe I'll try to write more. I'm sure it won't be super exciting stuff all the time but it helps me get out of my head a bit.
i started talking to an old friend again. I've known him for 8 years which is crazy! Weve always talked about getting together but its hard with the distance and just life things. i am glad we are talking again, he makes me feel safe and special and sometimes that's all I need.
In shadows cast by candle's glow,
A figure watches from below,
Admiring in a silent stance,
The power of the Domina's dance.
Her grace commands the room's expanse,
In leather, lace, a mystic trance,
Submissive heart, with longing plea,
Yearns to serve, to set it free.
From afar, a silent devotion,
Admiring her poised, fierce emotion,
In awe of strength, in every move,
The Domina's will, the heart does soothe.
A longing gaze, a whispered sigh,
As the submissive soul draws nigh,
Enthralled by her dominion's call,
Yearning to surrender all.
The Domina, fierce, the submissive, meek,
In this dance, they find what they seek,
A silent bond, a distance crossed,
In admiration, love embossed. Oh my sadism !!
Today im creating another thinking.
Why ?
Because im litterally and profundly agitated, someone activated my mind, giving me a pleasure more than an orgasm, creativity !
And into this universe, its delightfull.
Im a psychological person you know.
Mind transcend all pleasure.
Its addictive and soo rare to find people like me, maybe theyre just hidden, or ephemeral.
Thats why i taste every part of my discussion.
Ironically, i have all my tasty favorite toys for suffering but i dont have anybody to play...
Sadly i will sleep today with a little frustration into my little warm heart.
Sincerely
Madness Many times I get the question about what happens when two tops meet. The concept of two dominant males sharing some sort of intimacy seems contradictory, after all no one conceives a dom without a sub. That is not always the case and I will, like in all my journals speak from experience. There is a degree of power exchange between Doms and I do not talk about silly posturing and drama. If two dominant males find themselves alone and aware of each other,s preference coue of things will happen. Like I said there are degrees of asserting domination and sometimes one will yield and becomes submissive to the more dominant male. There are reasons for this behavior, one is the overwhelming realization that amongst equals there is alway a better masks and truly no shame comes from realizing and internalizing that fact. I'm not implying the the more submissive is and will be a sub the rest of their life, no. What I am saying is that recognizing g who is the better man is what defines the boundaries of intimacy. I have friends that have their fair share of submissives but once in a while they will come to me to serve and be bred. after, back to being a top. But why this behavior? Like I said overwhelmed by. Dryer male they yearn to serve and be intimate. If a dime submits must be to someone better than them and someone they appreciate both as male and Bull. The other scenario I've experience is that broth being powerful males and bulls there is no submitting. How then is that encounter? What I have experienced is the act of respectful admiration of each other bodies and rods. Eventually, it will get to self exploration and release by mastication. There is no phisicl contact but the admiration that can only a true bull can bestow on another bull.
It is very intense to have two powerful males together, alone, and horny. Their mutual pheromones make the atmosphere thick and eventually there’s only one way out, taking matters in our own hands. there is no mystery, two males will do what comes naturally and either occupy their place or remain on top gloriously alone. That's the natural order of things.
Acceptance instead of expectation.
The following was found in a journal of a German slave with a user name of “foreverslavery” on Collarspace. I have not received a response to my request to use the passage. I suspect a large part of it was written by someone else.
In any case the writing displays a characteristic I want in a slave I would own. That characteristic is a mind set of living in acceptance rather than expectation.
The road to discontent is paved with expectation.
Slavery Truth
Many ask if slaves truly exist. In the way a dictionary and history define slavery, no they do not exist in most modern countries. (Though there is some contention that slavery rings do still exist in secret) Most people in civilized countries generally agree that the legal ownership of another human being is immoral and thus make it illegal. However, in the world of BDSM, one will find that some of the people involved call themselves by many different terms; one of these is the term "slave". Of course, this often raises the question of how is a slave different from a submissive. This question often is met with outright hostility, disbelief in the existence of slaves and the thought that the words slave and submissive (as nouns) are interchangeable terms within the context of BDSM. Many will not agree with any of those thoughts, and I am one of them. I have spent a great deal of time talking with slaves in the honest attempt to better understand them, their lifestyle choices, and judge for myself whether or not this is a healthy variation to the BDSM lifestyle.
To the question of whether or not slaves exist inside of BDSM I say that yes they do. They may not be the largest group, but there are quite a few. Do slaves differ from submissives? Again, my answer is yes they do. Slaves tend to differ from submissives by the way they think, act, submit and their expectations.
A slave tends to think more along the lines of black and white. They have very little room for leeway or shades of gray in their lifestyle choices. They do not seem to expect much leeway in the reaction of their dominant either. By this I mean, if a slave is feeling ill and thus doesn't complete all their usual daily tasks, they will expect the dominant to react with the usual punishment. A submissive may be more inclined to expect leniency from the dominant because they were ill. A slave thinks in terms of being owned, not in terms of submitting. To them, being in a collared relationship means they are owned, and often this translates into the statement that they do not have the "right" "choice" or "option" to walk out if the relationship goes bad. This does not mean a slave will accept an abusive relationship, though their tolerance limits for what is abusive and what is not seem to be higher than those of a submissive. This belief in ownership stems from a strong commitment on both an emotional and mental level to the dominant. There is a level of acceptance of the dominant's behavior that can be more intense and widespread than many submissives would allow. For example, a dominant wants to bring in a third to the relationship. A submissive may demand certain criteria be met before they allow ( yes, allow) such to occur, whereas a slave may say "It is not up to me, if this is what Master wants, so be it" and quietly accept this new change. To some this kind of thought process is considered wrong or somehow brought out by abuse, but this is not necessarily true. A slave thrives on the absolute fact, that they literally have no control over the relationship or what will occur within it, whereas a submissive often retains some level of control in the relationship. The thought process focuses solely on what would make the master/mistress happiest and how the slave can be most pleasing to them. Subs tend to think of themselves and their own pleasure in addition to that of their dominant. Slaves work very hard to put themselves second in all the things and their owners first. To them, this is what comes with being a slave and submitting completely. Slaves put forth a lot of effort in achieving an inner peace with their chosen position. With this peace comes acceptance of themselves, and a quiet sense of contentment. They view pride, arrogance and other such emotions as negative and unbecoming in a slave.
A slave's behavior is different from a submissive as well. If you listen to slaves talk about their behavior (or watch them), they often speak of being quietly accepting, in control of themselves at all times, formal, and other such things. There seems to be more focus on how the slave behaves at any given moment, with less leeway. In many slave relationships, the slave is required to use an honorific at all times, and couldn't conceive of calling their master/mistress by any other name. Most slaves find yelling, tantrums, fits, or any other out of control behavior on the part of a slave to be reprehensible and deserving of severe punishment. Slaves put a lot of emphasis on their behavior and how they react to their dominant. They hold themselves to a high level of self-control. They require of themselves to have a pleasing demeanor as much as possible. They see no room for bratting behavior, any form of topping from the bottom, or any other form of manipulating the dominant. They see bratting as topping from the bottom, whining, cajoling or making requests after the initial denial as manipulative behavior that focuses on the slave's needs/desires instead of the dominant's and thus not proper. They look down on any behavior that is perceived as designed to force the dominant to meet a need of the slave, rather than the slave focusing on the dom's needs. A slave will strive for perfection within themselves in completin The Throne Room
Our friends were meeting us at the dungeon. We tried this scene at home and we ended up pulling out the ceiling chains from the rafters. The set up was for suspension not stretching. So we planned on doing this stretching scene in the throne room at the dungeon.
That was the plan.
The set up was simple. I was going to be in the middle and our friends were going to be on each side of me. My wrists were attached to chains that went to the ceiling and the excess chain hanged down on each side of me so that our friends could pull them.
The dominant watched from the throne placed in n front of me. She would give the order and the chains would be pulled and I would be lifted onto the air with my arms pulled wide.
That was the plan.
For this scene I didn't have much to do. All I had to do was strip down to my string bikini bottoms and attach chains to my suspension cuffs. My arms were spread wide as I waited for the order.
"Stretch her!"
The husband and wife on either side of me started pulling the chains. But they struggled. By flexing my biceps I was able to fight the chains. Two more friends who were watching joined in. Now there were two people on each side of me pulling the chains. By flexing my biceps I was still able to fight the chains.
Two more people joined in. I now had six people trying to pull me apart. I was now on my tiptoes as my arms were being pulled wide and I was being stretched. Two more people joined in. I now had eight people, four on each side, pulling the chains that were now stretching me.
I was now lifted off the floor with my arms tightly stretched by the chains. I let out a long moan of pain as I was being pulled apart. My torturers looked up at my torture stretched body and waited for the order
"Enough!"
They let go of the chains and I dropped to the floor. Spent. Hi to those who read my journal.
Major updates since updating a profile sucks ass now...
I do have a male partner, we are long term and engaged. Yes, I am still poly, but guys I am now triple picky when vetting you. You have to be damn special to fit into my life.
To all the amazing women looking for women here.... I am looking for just myself. That means my male partner will have no more then friendship contact with you unless YOU request for more. I just ask to be on friendly terms like be able to come over play board games, maybe go to the movies or dinner with all of us together. No this will not be every time maybe once every couple months. If you are looking for live in, great we can figure that out as well.
My age now: 45 The message collector : those that receive messages, but do not reply.
Then the subs that don't like your messages, or too afraid to reply.
This is not tinder people!
Most likely will not respond to those subs that like to describe the way a dom should be..
Why? Ask yourself..
Looking into contracts.. Now that has been fun in the past..
Looking into hypnotism...
Ethical BDSM, an interesting concept and I enjoy chewing on this a bit.
Examples:
A supposed vocational slave offers their self. They present a wild origin story and present day scenario for their enslavement to you. Later it is determined the so called slave is a liar and a fraud who has shared false information and received only truth from you.
Now imagine this slave was infact already enslaved, no way out, a prisoner for all intents and purposes to another. The slave is given leave by their Mistress to 'play' on Collar as a means of entertainment and or even as a cruelty or punishment. The Mistress can read and or respond to any email from you she chooses or she may not. However, she does read and lead her slave deeper into the deception. The slave has been instructed to not expose his Mistress.
Is the slave responsible for being a liar and fraud? The slave is to obey, afterall.
What does this say about the Mistress? She is well within her rights to have her slave behave as she desires, yet what she asks her slave to do is an affront to another, it V I O L A T E S. She has directed a deception.
Is this ethical behavior on her part? Does anyone care?
***
Take Masters who train a slave out of being able to act on self preservation. Lets say they want to test this and they command the slave lay out their arm to be run over with their car. The slave obeys, bones are broken and the slave has no further feeling in that side. It is within their right to do so, yet what could possibly be the reasoning behind such an act? What is ethical about training a slave to do something which causes harm to their self or another?
I've come across the notion of supremicists within this realm, on opposing sides of the tracks, who justify dismantling another human being in an effort to degrade them beyond all else. Training a slave to submit to all manner of what can only be considered to be torture. Perhaps they believe one human is less human than another. Perhaps they have some demons of their own to work through. Or perhaps they are uneducated or scaredy cats or they themselves brainwashed with outdated beliefs since birth.
Is this ethical behavior and do we really care, as a group, society or a people?
Some of this sounds like corrupted power to Me, yet who am I to judge?
" Oh what a tangled web we weave, when first we practice to deceive."
Just because we can do something, does that mean we are not accountable for doing it? Such fine lines we dance between in the theatre of our likes and loves. Of course, ultimately it is up to those involved to determine what is right and wrong, for the course. The same can be said for any of life's avenues. Humans have the right to do unto another if permitted. Humans have the right to allow another to do unto them.
Does this also mean one human or a group of humans have the right to violate another? To decieve or to manipulate or to mutilate and how does one determine where the line in the sand is drawn or even is there sand?
Where do ethics come into play or do they? Surely we see every day, examples of our global society grappling with the concept of ethics in everything we do.
By permitting 'each to his or her own' are we not in essence saying, "I don't want you to tell Me what to do so I wont tell you what to do?"
I wonder how this makes us better, or if it even matters. Perhaps we are too wounded or too neglected, too needful or too out of control to embrace andor be embraced by ideas of greatness.
Perhaps the final frontier is indeed paying attention to our mental health.
I believe the difference between a slave and a submissive is in the consent. I believe in consensual slavery and that a Master/Owner has the final say. I also believe in emotional intelligence and in ethics.
I'm not sure emotional intelligence or ethics really matter in the grand scheme of things, yet they matter to Me and as with all things, in degree.
What if the determining factor for whether good or not good prevails in the world is held in the balance of the scales of how many people believe in good and how many believe in not good? How many practice good and how many practice greed, deception, intolerance, bullying?
Imagine if what you believe, is what will happen.
Lately I've watched videos of people showing fake food, I've even come across some of it Myself.
But, I also question My life choice coming on this site that is now so full of fake people. They have flesh and bones yes, but no soul,
no honesty, half truths, and sometimes just down right lying losers and energy vampires.
I know I can't be the only one knowing this. I hear from men saying the same thing however , they are usually ( not always ) bullsh#ters themselves.
Yet here I am, still looking for a honest person is a sea of 1000's. Come on people, DO BETTER !
If your just looking for a play partner, say so. If you have family,property, work or a business and can't move, say so, better yet don't even write ,unless you will benefit Me.
I'm not a needy person, I do well enough on My own. I'm not looking for a certain look, body type or financial status. I don't give a sh#t.
Just because the world is going a bit crazy doesn't mean you have to.
I only want grounded honest people around Me. That's it !
Can I be honest for a moment?
I never wanted to live to be this old.
I used to tell my friends all the time I didn't want to live past the age of 55, and I meant it.
But here I am, and the next 40 or so years look even more bleak than the first 55 were.
I was deliberately reckless in my youth for a reason.
And you know I'm going to live to be at least 100.
Because God is a sick sadistic fuck, and knows I don't really want to be here any more.
Yet here I be.
And the ONLY thing I'm interested in these days is going to kink parties and having fun with my friends from time to time.
So if you don't want to take me out to a kink party, get off my fucking lawn.
Tonight's top email -
"You know your getting rid of 55 to 60 of potential contacts by restriction in your second paragraph?"
Well, first of all - "you're." A contraction of "you" and "are." Kinda tells me a lot right there.
I wrote back and responded to what I thought he meant. But no.
"Dimina its the political restrictions that throw out 55 60 of the potentials in line"
Then second, it's not "Dimina" and third, its not the second paragraph. It's the 4th and 5th sentence. Further clarifies the kind of person writing.
So I responded to THAT.
"If the political restrictions are the problem, then they arent actually potentials. They would be incompatible with me on many deep levels, and compatibility is the most important thing to me. The fact that they might not consider it an incompatibility, and would want to approach anyway, just further illustrates the basic incompatibility.
The bottom line is this it doesnt matter what someones kinks are, how much money they make, etc. If I cant respect them as people, I dont want to be around them in any capacity. If I cant respect them as people, then I ABSOLUTELY dont want to have to spend the kind of time with them that is required for kink, intimacy, or a relationship of any kind.
Its not politics. Its a basic test of character, intelligence and humanity.
No one on that side of the table is going to meet my requirements in those areas.
Or, to put it in the simplest terms if someone is in the same crowd as the self- proclaimed Nazis and isnt leaving, I dont want to know them."
Let me try to explain something here - If "liberal politics" is a hard limit, maybe don't contact people for whom fascism, libertarianism, and Drump are hard limits. Seems pretty straightforward to me. I mean, isn't a profile for finding common interests and weeding out incompatibilities? Contacting someone who you KNOW isn't interested in you, and who you know has qualities you aren't interested in, to complain that their hard limits keep you from approaching?
Whining is really unattractive, guys.
Then again, maybe he WANTED to be humiliated.
So... merry christmas, random complainy dude? Master's WritingsFoundations: Deep Honesty and the Butterfly EffectAs I see it, there are three core elements, communication, trust and honesty, that together form the foundation for feeling safe as we explore the lifestyle. Each element is interdependent with the others, and intertwined in such a way that to fail any one breaks them all, leaving us unsure and at risk, while when they all work right, we feel able to explore the greatest depths imaginable.With regard to honesty, we, in the lifestyle, are far better equipped to get it right than anywhere within the vanilla world. Power dynamics, the emotional nakedness of play and the acceptance of near infinite diversity among our interests and population make total honesty far more achievable within the lifestyle than others then you might think.Yet honesty can suffers from the crushing weight of a single butterflies wing. As children, we learn to lie because we get away and it always starts with the smallest of lies or the things we hide from those we love. As we grow, we believe that lying is acceptable with those we love and in society in general. This acceptance allows us to learn to lie even to ourselves, and as we mature, we discover that we have grown comfortable being false to others and even to ourself. We no longer know what is authentic and the distance between those close to us grows and decays. And we wonder why. In fact, as a society, we have entered an age where falsehood and lying is now the norm and an accepted practice.In a dynamic where “Total Honesty” is practiced, lies are never allowed, not in part nor in full, not even lies of omission or hidden truths of any kind. Sharing is always total, free and open. The freedom of an open mind and heart is the only acceptable mindset. While nearly all in the lifestyle preach this in one form or another, we must be aware of the impact of that single small butterfly wing. For just like the child growing up, a single allowance of a hidden feeling, an uncomfortable truth left unspoken, or a fear not communicated, has the potential to become habit forming and thereafter impact and erode the beauty and depth of a dynamic. A hidden feeling can undermine the understanding one partner has for the other. An uncomfortable truth can lead to the birth of resentment and anger when not spoken where it is allowed to fester. A fear left unchecked causes stress, clouds the mind, undercut trust, causes stagnation and allows anxieties to run unchecked or worse.Within a dynamic, the expectation and practice must be to understand the impact, the cause and effect, of that single delicate wing of the smallest of lies and/or omissions, remaining fully open to each other, totally authentic of self, and emotionally naked before your partner. For it is only within a dynamic filled with such honesty that we make possible the deep, beautiful and magical experiences we all seek. On the Nature of Slavery — A Master’s Perspective
Slavery, in its truest sense — the ownership of one human being by another — predates recorded history. For over ten thousand years, it has existed alongside the growth of civilization, woven into the story of humankind itself. But there is a vital distinction to be made: the difference between non-consensual slavery and consensual slavery.
Non-consensual, involuntary slavery is a crime. It is illegal in every major nation and stands in direct opposition to the principles of human dignity. I condemn it without hesitation. Any person found to be engaged in such practice deserves the full force of the law. It is an affront not only to morality but to civilization itself.
And yet, there exists another path — one that is lawful, deliberate, and chosen: consensual slavery. This is no myth. It is as real as marriage, as binding in spirit as any oath freely sworn. In the eyes of the law, the word “slave” cannot appear in a legal contract — the 13th Amendment sees to that — but the principles of slavery can be honored, so long as the arrangement is entered into by informed, willing adults.
Consent is the keystone. The individual must be of sound mind, capable of understanding the depth of what they give, and willing to yield fully to the bond. In this way, rights may be waived, freedoms surrendered, not by force, but by choice. It is a reality the uninformed often deny, clinging to arguments born of ignorance or fear. They forget that people surrender rights every day — often without realizing it. The difference here is that it is done with eyes open.
While some may call a monogamous, affectionate, and mutually respectful arrangement “slavery,” I do not. Such relationships, no matter how intense the play or ritual, I regard as deep Dominance and submission — not true slavery. Slavery, to me, is a state of being where one’s will is no longer one’s own, where the identity of “property” is absolute, and where the Master’s word is the axis upon which the slave’s world turns.
The law will never recognize true ownership of a human being — but within the sanctity of consensual agreement, within the walls of trust, discipline, and surrender, one can live it in spirit and in truth. Agoraphobia, fibromyalgia, anxiety, depression...and to add to it Hashimoto's disease, severely high blood pressure, a concerning breast lump and ADHD of all things.....it was better before i went to the docot and didn't have to know all this....
my Doctor is amazing, and she told me we have a long road ahead of us, but she will help as much as she can....thankfully she's not the type to push medications. i really don't want to take a million pills every morning.
the next few months will be brutal. Ahh, my favorite season is here... Anything-But-Summer! I love the cooler weather in general, plus it gives me an opportunity to spend more time working in my yard. Now is the perfect time to look over my plants to see what was successful, and what may need relocated or even replaced. Once again, I'm enjoying the small surprises, such as the blueberries that have survived and even appear to be thriving in the bags in which I purchased them this spring. I'm saddened by the plants that looked promising in the spring, yet didn't survive the summer.
Much like those plants, although pleasant for a while, apparently I need to reassess some of the relationships in my life and consider finding others that have the potential to last longer and grow even more beautiful. Who wants to frolic and grow in my garden? *ominous grin* It's so tempting maintaining control. Giving your will to another is scary. Planting myself in your mind and triggering you where and when I want, such a rewarding experience. You'll slowly surrender to my voice. You never know when you're going to submit. When the proverbial rug of sanity will disappear under your foot, just it will happen. Your body will tremble. My voice is stronger than you desire to disobey. When I speak, you wait expecting. Can you live in that terror. Always expecting. Do I terrify you. Are you willing to give it all shock then awwwwww 🥰
There is an undeniable chemical reaction that happens when a skilled Dominant creates an emotionally, physically safe space.It can permeate play and every day!
As a submissive, im constantly chasing that dopamine rush. The contrast of adrenaline high, being thrust 100% into my body. Immediately shocked into the feelings, scents, sounds, taste…. Until Completely depleted and exhausted. followed by being held. Dissolving into His body heat. Slowly, methodically talked down by His deep voice, grounded in my body, calmed, caressed by His words. His voice, His touch become my safety. In those moments, nothing else exists.
No thought, only gratitude. This is where im meant to be…. Why i will follow Him, do everything He asks without hesitation. How i navigate each day, focused on Him. Always moving back toward this space.
ive submitted to different degrees over the years. It wasn’t until recently that i was shown the difference between choosing to submit and absolute submission of heart, body, mind. There’s no going back now…
“Anything less would be uncivilized
I’ve been sitting with an idea lately…
Something physical. Intentional. Real.
Not just another space where people hide behind screens and curated personas—but a place where presence matters. Where energy is felt the moment you walk in. Where structure, atmosphere, and expectation all exist without needing to be explained.
A fetish-inspired bar and restaurant.In South Columbus.
Not chaos. Not a free-for-all.
But a refined environment—where power, dynamic, conversation, and culture can exist in the same room. Where people understand how to carry themselves. Where discretion and awareness aren’t optional—they’re expected.
A place where what you are isn’t something you type… it’s something you embody.
So I’m curious—
Would you actually show up for something like that?
Not online interest. Not fantasy support.
Would you walk into that space, present yourself properly, and exist within it in a real way?
Because ideas are easy.
Building something real… requires the right people.
— Mistress Nikki Vixen any Mistresses or Dom wife's that have a sissy they think needs interaction or exposure to a Male send ME a message. maybe I can visit and make her feel very small and femme.
tammy, eager to talk to you...
any women who feel they need a good spankiing or whipping I would do that too.
also, a sissy contacting ME should have a sissy/femme name.....
a sissy contacting ME, especially regularly contacting ME should be wearing a plug. DB I was born with a genetic disability called Hypermobile Ehlers Danlos Syndrome, which means all of the collagen in my body is faulty In 2018 I also developed another illness that we believe to be Myalgic encephalomyelitis but I havent as of yet been diagnosed with that I didnt get my HEDS diagnosis until a year ago and I had that my whole life I also have comorbidities of Gastroparesis, a paralyzed stomach Mast Cell Activation Disorder, which is my body having random allergic reactions and Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia which is where my blood pools in my feet when I stand up causing low blood pressure and super-fast heartbeat, this leads to dizzy spells and fainting Ok, hello to all, Yes i am about to go ballistic on my rant.
this slave is now one of the happiest slaves on the planet. i am owned and the sole property. His name is MasterMike32. this slave is only allowed to be friends to all.
i would love to ask if there are any other slaves/submissives females that would love to become a sister to myself, please reach out. Wwe are looking for one to two, to add to Oour family. Although I do at times feel confident as a Domme I have to be honest with myself that when I look at profiles I seek Dominant Men rather than submissive men.
I was putting myself as a Domme more as protection and to things my way. In honesty I am more sub to almost slave in my sexually side. I seek partners that are Alpha, primal, animalistic but also loving, caring, sensual, honest, respectful. I fear being a sub due to past abuse and trying to protect myself. I don't wish to be degraded, ified, humiliated, abused. I am NOT a MASOCIST and also not wanting to be mentally or emotionally abused or even physically as well. Have this on my other profile as well not that anyone ever reads on this site but, oh well .....LOL
Took this online test. Turns out it's exactly the kind of vanilla side in a man that I am looking for. I usually don't do those online tests but I was bored LOL
My guy: Fun-Loving Charmer
Someone who makes life feel exciting and easy.
I'm drawn to humor, confidence, and people who don't take themselves too seriously.
Dates should feel like a good time, not an interview.My type: Funny, playful, socialGreen flags: Effort without pressureRed flags: Boring routines, emotional heaviness too fast
Yes there has to be a vanilla side as well, or the kind of lifestyle D/s that I am looking for just won't work.
No, you can't fake it, and No, I won't just take your word for it, it has Janitor of lunacyIdentify my destinyRevive the living dreamForgive their begging scream
I was told last night by a coworker that I remind them of Clementine from Eternal Sunshine of the spotless mind...
That was the best compliment ever... Clementine was so misunderstood. Denn meine Liebe ist Gift für dich
Heilung gibt es leider nicht
Meine Liebe und du zerbrichst
Meine Liebe ist Gift
Meine Liebe ist Gift I spent the better part of Friday evening in tight breast bondage. Goddess Tabitha started at the chest wall of each of my breasts and wound the thin rope round and round until each breast felt like it was being crushed.She then had me stand on a stack of books and she took an additional rope and wound it around both breasts then tossed the free end of the rope over the rafter in the living room and tied it off. With a simple slap on my bottom I stepped of the books to hang by my breasts, my toes about six inches off the floor.It was such an awkaward feeling. It felt like each breast was going to explode, it felt like they were going to be ripped from my chest, it felt like I was going to fallover backward all at the same time.She then took a lit candle and ran it around my backside. Bursts of pain and heat here and there making my body jerk adding to the pain in my breasts with each flinch.It didn't last long as my breasts actually started turning very dark, it was heaven and hell all at once. I was so very close to orgasm as she let me downAfter I was untied I had to crawl between her legs to service her needs in gratitude for my training session. I whimpered, begged with my eyes and twerked my hips to tell her how desperally I needed release. She just kissed me and said "not tonight pet, maybe tomorrow"We went to bed and cuddeled until we ferll asleep.I am such a lucky girl :) I have found a fuck buddy.
Met face to face, seems nice enough and actually single.
Was direct on the phone that I want to use him for sex.
I have started recleaning and reorgnisnig the flat so definately preparing for company.
stocked up the wine rack, beers in the fridge, heaps of meat and fish in the freezer.
Bought silk PJ and silk underwear - not into the whole leather crap.
Buying rope and going to practice hog-tying him for my own pleasure.
Etsy have some really cute strap-ons, girly ones with pretty patterns.
Candle play wax.
Should write a list of things I want to practice and experiement.
TBC (to be continued).
C I prefer to take thing, it's easier to ask for forgiveness than permission
Plus permission can be hard to come by.
Why now just take it and break it into what you want
Just be comfortable with yourself in skin.
Anything can be beautiful with confidence
STRANGE FRUIT 2026 A PIECE I WROTE ABOUT ALL THE BULLSHIT GOING ON THIS COUNTRY STILL.
SEEMS LIKE WE ARE STILL HUNGRY FOR MORE STRANGE FRUIT . EVEN IN 2026 THE VULTURES HUNGER FOR THE SWEET FLESH SLOW HANGING ON THE VINE . AS THE BIRDS GATHER AND FIGHT FOR THE TASTE OF THE FIRST MORSEL . BUT THIS FRUIT IS NOT AS SWEET AS IT SEEMS BECAUSE UNLIKE TRUE FRUIT THIS DOESNT HAVE THAT SWEET TASTE THEY NORMALLY CRAVE. THIS FRUIT HAS ALWAYS HAS BEEN POISONED FROM THE ROOT TO SOUL I MEAN SOIL , IT GROWS FROM.THE GROUND SOAKED WITH CENTURIES OF BLOOD, PAIN,AND HATE. A BREEDING GROUND WHERE NOTHING THAT IS MEANT TO THRIVE GROWS DESPITE ALL THE BIRDS AND ANIMALS MEANT TO CUT ITS LIFE SHORT AND STUNT ITS GROWTH .THIS FRUIT THAT HAS BEEN BRED THROUGH YEARS, DECADES AND CENTURIES OF BLOOD , HATE, AND DEATH. BUT THIS FRUIT RESILIENT . GROWN UNDER THE PRESSURE OF OPPRESSION AND BEATENED DOWN. EVERYTIME THIS FRUIT BEGINS TO FLOURISH AND STARTS TO GROW TOWARDS THE SUN. THE CROWS START TO GATHER AND THE MOUTHS START TO WET, AS THEY STARE IN RAVENOUS HUNGER AT THE DELICIOUS FRUIT, WITH ITS SWEET NECTAR SLOWLY DRIPPING TO THE GROUND. THIS FRUIT THAT ALL THE CROWS AND CROWDS OBSESSED OVER, DID ANY EVERYTHING TO GET THEIR CLAWS ON. THE MOMENT THEY OBTAINED THIS FORBIDDEN FRUIT THEY CELEBRATED BY RIPPING APART THE FLESH . GOBBLING UP ITS SWEET BUT BITTER FLESH RELISHING IN THE EXCTASY . THIS RARE DELICACY THAT HAS BEEN GROWN AND PICKED FOR HUNDREDS OF YEARS. EVEN THROUGH THE ROUGHEST OF CONDITIONS FROM EXTREME DROUGHT TO DROWING IN THE JUICES OF THE OTHER FRUIT THAT WAS LEFT HANGING ON THE VINE .YOU CAN FIND THIS FRUIT YEAR ROUND .THIS RARE FRUIT ON THE VINE EVEN IN THE HARSHEST WINTER. STILL HANGS AND SWINGS IN THE BREEZE. THIS BEAUTIFUL RARE FRUIT THAT THEY ALL CRAVE. COMES IN SEVERAL VARIETIES. PICKED AT DIFFERENT STAGES SOME PICKED BEFORE THEY WERE MATURE OTHERS LATER IN THEIR GROWTH CYCLE.THIS FRUIT THAT COMES IN MANY VARIETIES. LIKE A YOUNG 21 YEAR I MEAN DAYS OLD VARIETY CALLED KYLE, OR A 31 AGED VARIETY CALLED DAPHY. FOR THOSE WITH MORE MATURE TASTES THEY ALSO HAD A VARIETY CALLED NURUL. BUT IF THOSE VARIETIES DONT INTEREST YOU I'M SURE If WE TURN OUR HEADS AND WAIT. A BRAND NEW YOUNG FRUIT WILL APPEAR. FRESH ON THE LINE I MEAN VINE. YOU WILL KNOW ITS THIS SPECIAL FRUIT. BY THE GATHERING OF THE CROWS. LISTEN YOU CAN HEAR THEM HUNGRILY CALLING. CAU CAW! I recently sent this to a few people who DMed me:
"Did you send this to me by mistake? It reads as though you are in the middle of a conversation with someone else."
As it turns out, people are referring to journal posts I have made days, weeks or even months in the past WITHOUT AN INTRODUCTION EXPLAINING WHY THEY ARE WRITING TO ME.
It does not take much to preface a message with, "I saw your most recent journal post here and I think ..." or "I was doing a deep dive into your journal here and I noticed ..."
I do not re-read my journal every time I log on. My DMs are not the comments section of my journal. Indeed, journal entries here are not like forum topics where the the context is already obvious.
So if you write me about something I posted to my journal and I have no idea what you are talking about, now you know why I sent you that type of reply. I've been into BDSM D/s for more years that I care to count.
You'd find me to be a bit outdoorsy, I own a boat.. enjoy fishing, being outside and all that offers. At the same time, I consider myself well read.. a CNNaholic. .. (liberal politics, for what that's worth to you).. and I have a well worn library card.
As a Dominant, it is among my joys to be able to stimulate a submissive mind.. to help conjure new ideas.. new feelings... I like to be creative.
I'm not as much an analyzer, as I am a decision maker. Not that I'm quick to jump to a conclusion.. but.. I'm decisive. I tend to not waiver or vascillate.
Over the years, I've considered myself a Master .. a Dominant.. and, sometimes, a Daddy. I like all three, and have learned much about myself.
I'd welcome an opportunity to correspond with you about mutual interests.Thanks. Happiness always looks small while you hold it in your hands, but let it go, and you learn at once how big and precious it is.
Every man needs a good woman in his life. Even if she is just his friend. A good woman adds value to a mans life, no matter what capacity she serves.
Well, it seems journals are working again!
Please don't ask me for meaningless play, or suggest I have an interest in you showing up now and then. I'm only interested in a real and whole relationship IN PERSON. I am the real thing, like some men seem to want... a lifestyle slave who is also intelligent and capable. I'm not moving, I own a large and lovely home that I have put a ton of money into customizing. I am only interested in a LOCAL loving dominant male who will make feel safe, and allow me to give myself to him as much as I am able, and not regret it. Yes, the "L" word. I want so much to put down my sword and shield.
I'm an older lady now, so what I can do physically is limited. But I can still do quite a bit of the things that work for me, and if you have fet or alt you can see faceless pics of me and my dungeon. But mostly, I want a loving strong man who can be in charge and not make me regret it. Is that You?
Right now, I am healing emotionally from giving myself entirely to someone who represented he wanted to be my Master, and then decided that being Jimminy cricket was more his style. If I were younger, I would take a few years off like I used to to heal, but I don't have that luxury now. So I have to get back in the pool.
Submission starts in the mind with a deep need to be controlled, not just physically but psychologically too. After all the mind is the most powerful organ.
The physical side is also important and when submitting should be done so wholeheartedly to somebody who is firm but fair.
There should be praise or reward if the sub does well, but also it should expect to be taught and corrected in no uncertain terms to do better when it fails to achieve the Dominant’s expectations.
A large part of the mental control comes from effective control and discipline, rules or protocols that leave the submissive in no doubt of what is expected if it. I've come to realize that a kink of mine, using "it" pronouns, in regard to ob ject ification and recognizing that I am an has really started to become ingrained. I've been feeling awkward using the word "it" with others because I've been the topic of ridicule before in a Discord chat.
People who are comfortable using the term, who enjoy using the term, who want to have an "it" is who I am looking for. That doesn't suspend my expectation that people will read my profile. My profile provides a lot of information about me and I absolutely know when people don't read it.
The more I think about the pronoun and persona, the more I know that it's going to be a long term kink. new year new problems
do you believe in fate? i only ask because there was a point in time where i was sure i had a good plan/path to transition that fell through so hard, it turned into a nearly two decade attempt at trying to bury what turned out to be a key part of me.
on the more peaceful side of things, something i figured was Never Gonna Happen ends up very real and This Is Us Now because hearts and minds change? or maybe being with someone that's actively on gender affirming hormones means you get the horrible reality of what the sex life is now.
but what does it mean? who is to say really. realistically nothing changes because the horrible problem with fate is that, ultimately, the destination at hand is supposedly set in stone and it's a path i've attempted and failed before.
so what can change this time besides the path that leads right back to that same void?
Yesterday I was asked to FaceTime with a lady on fet. I've been single for over 3 years and not active at all. Just for context, I was married for 24 years and that was too long for both of us. Do the math and you see that I got married pre-internet. It didn't take long until she was saying, "I wanna see it". OMG, the turn-on. I'm still trying to figure things out and what was the turn-on from. Was it that I hadn't felt wanted in so long. Was it her voice egging me on and that she was very turned on. What I came away with was Confidence that I do respond to sexual stimulation well. Looking forward to much more. As promised, here is a copy of your BDSMTest result with ID uZkZThzx100% Degradee100% Rope bunny100% Submissive99% Voyeur93% Exhibitionist92% Pet92% Slave85% Masochist80% Experimentalist70% Primal (Prey)59% Non-monogamist30% Vanilla9% Brat4% Primal (Hunter)0% Daddy/Mommy0% Rigger0% Ageplayer0% Brat tamer0% Degrader0% Dominant0% Little0% Master/Mistress0% Owner0% Sadist0% SwitchYou can also view it online at https://bdsmtest.org/r/uZkZThzx?lang=EN BEFORE YOU ASK WHAT I AM LOOKING FOR:
Hopefully at bare minimum I can find someone to chill with and take that friendship and trust beyond what the public sees and into some special erotic level in the bedroom Old profile removed July 6, 2025
All initial emails with less than three sentences, or missing capitalization and punctuation, are deleted and the sender blocked. Yes, I know Collarspace's filters remove some punctuation. That's not what I am talking about. Three sentences, not one long run-on sentence.
I am a switch. I have not bottomed or submitted since 2016, but if you cannot handle your dominant or top taking the bottom side I am not the one for you.
I am NOT looking for a dominant or top, hence identifying my profile as a domme. I do not reply to dominants or tops looking to dominate or top me.
I am polyamorous. I live with my wife Raine. She is aware of this profile and what I am looking for. She and I are play partners working back toward a power exchange that ended during the worst of the isolation because of COVID.
I am not looking for an Ms relationship or an Op relationship. If you self identify as a slave we are not compatible. I am not a female supremacist and I do not practice TPE.
If you are younger than 25 please do not apply.
What I AM looking for are local play partners, lovers, and or submissives. Local means in or around San Antonio. I am not looking for someone to relocate, move in with me, or play with me while they are visiting San Antonio.
My ideal submissive is service oriented and open to a variety of play styles and techniques, and open to trying new things. My ideal play partner has interest in multiple kinds of play and enjoys intense play and receiving pain.
Giving cunnilingus is a soft limit. Receiving cunnilingus is not high on my priorities list, although it can be lovely. I LOVE dildo play and fisting. I have reservations about strap-on harnesses.
If you are not in the San Antonio, TX area regularly, don't contact me as a potential submissive or play partner. I don't "play" online and I have no interest in choreographing elaborate scenes for you to act out on webcam to fulfill your fetishes. I am living my flesh life and I don't have time for an online life. Friendship and conversation are welcome, but no leading questions trying to get me to provide fap fodder.
My dance card is sometimes (over)full but that's the way I like it. There IS room in my life for a full time submissive should I come across one who is compatible with me.
The remainder of my profile remains intact from before:
I find minds sexy more often than I find bodies sexy, though I can certainly appreciate a sexy body! I love intelligence and learning, enjoy teaching what I know and learning from others, be they friend, lover, submissive, Dominant, switch, or myriad role identities.
I'm open to finding kinky friends who can hang out at home with or without play, play partners who share my interests, lovers, or submissives. Or all of the above. A poly pansexual service oriented submissive who likes edgy as well as everyday play, can take intense pain and get satisfaction from it, and wants to serve a BBW Domme would be great. ~Santa, here's my list, no, I'm not holding my breath.~
Micro e-mails are a pet peeve of mine. Write an e-mail with at least three sentences. But don't send me a novella either - it takes getting to know someone before I'm motivated to read something overly long. One or two paragraphs is great. You could tell me what you liked about my profile, why you are writing (friendship, submission, playing, learning?), tell me a little bit about yourself.
I'm looking for a submissive that gets fulfillment from both service and play. I'd like to find one whose mind and body both attract me. I want to find a submissive and/or play partner who loves to explore, who loves lots of kinds of play, who finds intensity and connection sexy and hot and gets a lot from the connection in a scene not just what type of play is being done. I want to find someone who is up for light spanking and tickle play one day, and a wicked caning another, who can handle flames licking across their skin and delight in it just as much as a tongue's caress. I want someone who can play light and silly as well as deep and intense, who can enjoy something as mundane as a spanking while still being open to trying hot, sexy, edgy, rough shit.
But it's not all about play. I want a submissive who gets along well with me, who is a delightful conversational partner, who is intelligent and sometimes witty. I would love to find a submissive who helps me with my flaws and supports me in my own goals as much as they work to improve themselves and make me proud they are mine, to be in my service. I want a submissive who is willing to help out, whether it is helping me fold laundry and dry dishes or brainstorming a website design. Gimme gimme! A submissive who loves to learn! A submissive who loves to serve! A submissive who loves to play! A submissive who loves letting go of control! A submissive who is self aware, practices self honesty, and communicates clearly! I'm not interested in someone whose ONLY interaction with me is for BDSM, or for play, or for sex. I want to find someone who can become a part of my life, who feels comfortable joining me for vanilla hangout time, sexy snuggle time, as well as kinky dress up and play time.
But that doesn't fully describe it either. I want to find someone who feels that submission is about more than doing chores or taking a good beating. Where is that mind hiding that WANTS to be told to do something disagreeable, because submitting is sometimes about doing what you DON'T like. A submissive who knows saying "I don't like that" is a way of giving me more control. That it doesn't mean I won't do it any more, it just means when I do it I will do it DELIBERATELY!! Are you out there, craving someone who isn't afraid to deny the things you like just to watch you squirm and make you beg for them? Where is the submissive who loves high protocol as well as casual time? Where is the submissive who can make offering to take my plate into the kitchen touch my heart? Where is the submissive who isn't ashamed to kiss my feet in front of friends, who wants to be the best they can be so that I can be proud to own them? Are you out there, unready to give everything to a stranger, but wanting to let go and give up control, incrementally, as trust develops?
Read my journal entries to learn a bit about me. This is long already, so I won't start trying to describe who I am, but if you'd like to know, ask and I'll probably answer.
I am not your Chocolate Queen, Domme, Mistress, Baby, princess etc. I don't know you. I don't do random terms of endearment when there is no relationship established.
You may address me as Ms.cherry when messaging me.
If you are a person under the age of 26 DO NOT. JUST DON'T.
Refrain from messaging me about things you want to do to me, or things you want me to do to you.I DO NOT CARE. Keep your fetishes and imaginary expectations to yourself. People don't have to participate in your fantasy because your dick jumped at my photos.
Thanks for he compliment
I got some bad news today and all I want to do is curl up and cry but Master said I'm not allowed to. Instead of immediately responding with yes Sir, I asked why. I swear my curiosity and mouth are going to be the end of me. I was caught off guard by being told crying wasn't allowed, that the question just came out because I really wanted to know why I couldn't. It wasn't meant to question him, I was just trying to understand why I couldn't cry. I haven't cried, he said not to so I won't, but I am still really close to it, just now with the added worry of whether or not he's upset with me for asking why I couldn't cry.
Understanding is how I learn, it's how I wrap my head around things, difficult things, and I can't do that if I don't understand. Or rather, it's really hard to wrap my head around things I don't understand. I'm trying to, though. A submissive is one who chooses each and every time if he /she will submit.
A submissive often comes with a list of his / her restrictions and requirements.
While a true slave is one who comes to serve in the manner in which the Mistress desires.
A true slave makes the decision to submit one time for always.
A true slave may have desires, dreams, and fantasies but he / she is not selfish and he / she relinquish their selfishness to serve the Dominant.
It takes a very strong person to live the life of being a slave to another.
To observe a slave growing and one day to see him /her become the perfected specimen in which the Domme has created is the goal.
The submission of a slave is very admirable.
I seek that slave!
The one who will serve Me always, under My safe keeping, and owned by Me.
I think it's strange that so many men are on this site are sort of in a fantasy world. It is like they are not coming to grips with the real world and I find that frustrating and sad at the same time.
Is it possibly because the real world is so tough for them that they just want to come on here and fantasize about serving someone. Yet knowing in their heart they will probably never do it and just get old and die alone in their la la land of make believe .
What a waste if a life. Seriously what is the meaning of your life if you don't fulfill your purpose. So you aquire some " things " . Then what ? Then your another 10 years older and closer to leaving this earth. Worthless life... Master's WritingsFoundations: The Ethics of SadismThe ethics surrounding sadomasochistic play are perhaps among the most important in all of the BDSM community. I constantly see posts from masochists searching for a "Real Sadist", someone who knows what they are doing and they can trust. And why shouldn’t they, in this realm, we are often talking about genuine pain and the potential for real harm. Yet I continue to see those who call themself by the title, who operate without a code and believe that sadism is nothing more than a license to hurt another person. Thus, the need for a code and identify the ethics behind the title.Up-front, any attempt to identify ethics must include basic standards such as:
Both parties being of minimum legal age
Both parties being competent to legally consent
All physical and mental health considerations of both parties have been made known
The nature, depth and limits on the activities have been previously agreed to by both parties
Consent of the bottom has been given to the activities discussed without any form of duress, coercion, manipulation or barter
and finally, that safewords or some form of safeguard communication is in place that stop or pause play as necessary
Beyond the basics, however, I believe that the ethics of sadism must go beyond that. It must include a dedication to perfecting one's skills and knowledge of the craft long before you ever raise a cane, a commitment to know your bottom to a depth beyond normal play so that you possess a clear understanding of what they want and why they want it and an absolute mandate that the Sadist never brings their outside emotions, such as anger or stress, into a scene (if you are made at the world, no bottom should pay for that). Additionally, it must also include a dedication to maintain a constant awareness of a bottom's capacities throughout any scene.But the real point of the ethics of Sadism lies in the commitment to maintaining all of these beliefs and values during the heart of a scene. It is easy to be ethical before a scene begins, but as the tempo rises, as the pain threshold lies within reach, being ethically strong enough to not get carried away in the thrill and glory of the moment is an ever present challenge. It is there, in that moment when a Sadist must lean into their ethics and remember their responsibility for a bottom's safety, the commitments you made about the scope play, and the dedication to not get sloppy with either technique or intention. In the heat of the moment, you walk the fine line between pleasure and pain, ecstasy and injury, but responsibility requires a strong ethical core to keep your bottom safe and deliver wisely on the gift of the experience you deliver.For me it is the connection I make during play, either physical, as in touch, or verbal, as in checkups, communication and listening. Connection helps remind me my bottom is a person. A person who has placed their body and experiences in my hands. It humbles me and reminds me that without ethics, I am no better than a monster with a whip. It is the ethics of Sadism that keeps me human and allows me to call myself a sadist with a clear conscience. hello I feel the need to write a post. I have been on here trying to seek someone to help me maybe come out of my shell. Yet I get messages from so called men or Doms on here that think that a woman should bow down to them. Act there kings when there not. Some one here can't act like slave Masters, well slavery days have been long gone. Some on here want to just act out storie, if I wanted that I would read a book, or wat h a movie. I have brains and a strong willed femal. I know what I want and don't want. I will not be talked to like I'm less then a woma. yes I came on here to meet someone to help me come out of my shell. Yes I stated I wanted to try anal play, I have never had anal but open to trying tha. No o don't want bruised or have my boobs tied up for what pain, or marks on my boobs no, do you want you dick tied up and bruised?? Well done might but still. Just maybe I'm on the wrong sit. uggg this is frustratin!!!!!!! == Results from bdsmtest.org: ==
93% Voyeur
91% Exhibitionist
88% Experimentalist
85% Dominant
80% Rigger
76% Non-monogamist
72% Brat tamer
69% Masochist
69% Master/Mistress
67% Switch
66% Owner
65% Primal (Hunter)
53% Daddy/Mommy
46% Sadist
45% Ageplayer
43% Rope bunny
42% Submissive
38% Degrader
38% Degradee
37% Brat
35% Slave
33% Vanilla
31% Primal (Prey)
26% Pet
18% Little
Early Christmas Present - December 23, 2023Horny bi guy came over. And oh my gosh, he was horny as usual. When he first arrived he came through the door and stripped naked for me. I immediately put a collar around his neck, and velcro wrist restraints on his wrists.I recently purchased a larger size ball stretching weight, because the 35 mm did not fit him on previous attempts. Well, we found out the 45 mm did not fit him either. I think part of it was it was cold outside and because he was just arriving and stripping naked first thing, he was still a bit cold, and his balls were sucked up against his body. I'll bet if we had tried again later we might have made it. Instead we put a cock cage on him. It took a few attempts to get the cock cage on his already hardening cock, but soon his cock was caged.I laid back on the couch a bit and beckoned his mouth over to my cock. He immediately dropped to his knees and started sucking on my cock. I wasn't being too forceful immediately, I wanted his throat to acclimate to the feeling of my cock wedged down his throat. But that didn't prevent me from grabbing him by the back of the head and pushing him down on my cock until he was gagging.He wanted another super deep enema. The last time he visited and I gave him a super deep enema it took us nearly 45 minutes, which is common, but he had a lot of cramping and later told me he never wanted to have a deep enema again. But now he was asking for a deep enema again. Against my better judgment we start the procedure.He came into the bathroom and immediately assumed the position. Down on all fours with his ass sticking up in the air. I lube my finger with a bit of Vaseline and slide it up and down the crack of his ass. He moans at my touch. The bathroom sink water is running requesting warm water from the hot water tank in the basement. That takes a few minutes for the warm water to arrive so I continue playing with his ass as we wait.
Eventually the warm water arrives and I fill up the old fashioned enema bag as full as I can get it. I asked him again if he's sure he wants a deep enema reminding him how he didn't like it last time. But the need for being used and humiliated overtakes the memory of the agony of the last enema and he forgets that he doesn't want another deep enema. And he tells me to proceed with the deep deep enema.I shove the plastic tube connected to the hose coming from the rubber bag into his tight hole. I push it far in his ass, farther than required, because I know we're going deep. I push down on the bag as it lays on the bathroom countertop, forcing the first burst of warm water into his ass. His ass is reluctant to take the water at first but as I continue to push against the bag eventually the pressure overpowers his bowels and the water starts to flow.Although I thought I had removed all the air from the bag, I hear the gurgle and burp of air as it passes through the tube into his ass. As I continue pushing down on the bag, he begins that familiar moan as I push more and more water into his ass. Much more than necessary, I empty the bag into his ass. He's whimpering in pain and I'm laughing about it.
CONTINUE READING AT www.SirKel.top
On enthusiasm:
I am demisexual, demiromantic, sapiosexual. I enjoy getting to know potential partners, exploring their minds and learning how they think.
If I'm not interested, I assure you that is what my reply email would say, if I send a reply. (I delete all emails with fewer than three sentences, regardless of the content.) If I take the time to go point by point through your email and bring things up, I'm open to possibility. I am not going to erupt in gushing enthusiasm because you wrote to me, no matter how pretty your language is or how long your profile is or is not. Enthusiasm develops over time, as connections build and I have a chance to see your cranium at work.
If I replied, and I was not dismissive by saying I'm not interested, there's a chance. If you give up because you need enthusiastic reactions from the start, all I can say is thank you for saving me the trouble. We are not compatible. No, I do not fall into sexting, virtual relationships (really?), or any form of online sex.
I am here for REAL and move fast to confirm if I am talking to a REAL person.
So, if one tells me something about dirty fantasies, I will reply with a "cool", or "I am also into it" and that's it. Do NOT expect me to simulate or fantasize.
If I approach you because you seem to be a fit and registered as relocatable, I expect you to wish for having voice and video calls for knowing each other. No camsex, no phonesex or any other stupid poor real-life replacement. The Journal has returned which was sorely missed for so long. It now has so many conditions that are prespective viewed it's difficult to know what is allowed as non offensive. Given that this in on the edge of societal norms creating a list of what is and isn't allowed without defined definitions allows for open interpertations by all. Remember that you can't please everyone and anyone can be offended by any posting they chose to be.
As an example these items:
Othering ~ This entire Life Style choice can be viewed as othering how could anyone not be offended if it was not their definition.
Culturally insensitive or hurtful ~ What is culturally insensitive "C I" when spoken from one race to another is not when spoken to the as race. Take the use of the N word. Anyone uses it to address a person of color when they are not and it is C I and even viewed as racist. Yet when spoken between peoples in that race to another it is allowed. So the definition applies to the readers ideas and ideals which those who post have no idea of.
The same applies to hurtful tell me what every reader thinks is hurtful and I can post in a way to not be. Of course I then lose any ability to express any thoughts as they have to be muted to what can be determined as hurtful. Again another eye of the beholder issue.
Criticism of other users or lists of "Bad" users. ~ What if one of these Bad users is engaging in exactly what is prohibited in posting here. How do you warn others if not in a post with the offending message included.
You might want to ask these questions of the Web Master and see what the reply is. Of course you might well be unable to post it to your journal.
I have been single a long time. I have many interests and desires. I am also complicated. I desire contol to stay safe, to be heard and respected. Although would love to be able to trust and know that I am safe as well as feel I matter and I am important. I crave to have a comittment and to be desired. I am wish to be able to lactate and feed my future partner or partners. I desire a deep bond. I am sexually more submissive but also like it my way. Finding the right balance has been hard to find.
Live the Life You're Meant to Live
You were not placed upon this groundTo stumble aimlessly around.A spark was lit, a flame was cast,A purpose born to hold you fast.
The breath you take, the time you spend,Was gifted with a higher end.Not just to drift, to merely be,But shape the world, your legacy.
Each talent, dream, and burning fireCalls out to lift your spirit higher.To squander it, to let it fade,Is to betray why you were made.
For those who idle, waste their light,Who fear to step or fight the fight,Will watch the world, a fleeting stream,While drowning in a shadowed dream.
But those who dare, who strive, who seek,To live their truth, though strong or weak,Will find the path that calls their nameAnd leave behind a glowing flame.
So rise, and live the life you’re meant,A fleeting gift, so wisely spent.For failure’s not to fall or trip,But to forsake your sacred script.
~ Miss Dar
Alaska is a beautiful Lady, she is a deadly bitch and She will kill you in a heartbeat. If you don't understand what I'm going to say about Alaska, ask and I will explain. What I'm looking for is life long commitment . What I expect. you will respond to My voice. you will let my voice control your mind. I will plant my words to trigger you. My triggers will cause your body to react as conditioned. I'm not hard core abusive but you will walk a fine line of constant excitement. Open your mind to me and I WILL put your pussy outside your body. It's so tempting maintaining control. Giving your will to another is scary. Planting myself in your mind and triggering you where and when I want, such a rewarding experience. You'll slowly surrender to my voice. You never know when you're going to submit. When the proverbial rug of sanity will disappear under your foot, just it will happen. My voice is stronger than you desire to disobey. When I speak, you wait expecting. Your body will tremble. Weather is getting cold here in Alaska. Almost time for subbies and slaves taken to the Mountains. Have your body stripped of warm clothing. Its so enjoyable to watch your face as your warm pussy is placed on a large rock at 40 below. Should I bring some ice cubes to help the spreading of cold slowly clawing its way into your pussy. Alaskan winters offer so much enjoyment. I hope to enjoy this winter, how about you? These are serious things to think about. I'm telling you now what your end results with me look like. Can you handle knowing what you will look like when I finish playing with your mind Can you live in that terror. Always expecting. Do I terrify you. Are you willing to give it all long ass run on sentence because again this ish ain't cooked like everything else..but i feel i have a foundation enough to share.
so the team sacred sexuality, spiritual sexuality in the bdsm camp isn't anything new.but it's often unlooked upon, not talked about often.
AND THEN WHEN IT IS PEOPLE TEND TO BE FREAKIN CULTISH or TRAFFIC like about it. again
GETTING CAUGHT UP IN THE SAUCE OF IT.
don't get caught up..don't go full you know what tropic thunder.
i wanted to delve into my unique mystic reference points of what i'm supposed to embody. less of a personal share and more these are the frequencies of that that people aren't talking about. and a more 3d anchoring of why if it's not torture, violent, malfiencent, demonic(DARK AND DEMONIC IS DIFFERENT), cycle of low vibes depression negative just to stay stuck this is powerful work going on here.
whichhhhh i'd say probably 85% of the people in the scene aren't open to doing, aren't doing...and then the 15% of us that are open to or trying often get lost in the ego/chemical/obsession/blah de blah sauce of it.....i'm sure some are doing the work but i'd say the temptation of falling into the earthly clutches is too hard for even the strongest souls out there. but i don't doubt some of us are...i'm just going to from my experience observation and etc. over the years say it's teeny tiny tim.
so i think eventually i'll start pulling specific texts, passages, etc. to reference...but at the moment this is what i'm cooking with here.
i got some seasoning on this meat and some side dishes. it might be in the oven but it got a few minutes left before it's fully cooked.
i want to at some point figure out this connection to triggering your mind to finding some sort of joy,release, ecstasy, penchant, tick for this to help with the initiation vibe of this life cycles of pain, struggle, internal external death, and rejuvenation rising to a new level of awareness, consciousness, playing life at a new game layer. and having to repeat crushing your soul over and over because at this point that's the only wu wei through it..the only way out is through..and if you somehow tweak or were born with a tweak of having some sort of pull to this on some level....it can definately ease that transition between i don't even want to be here anymore, i don't see what i can do, the next step forward is hard, getting out of the chair is hard. getting out of bed is hard, eating is hard...i'm in either so much chronic mental physical emotional whatever pain i don't even know how to make it to the next second..and yet here i am...and eventually sitting there long enough WOW that answers something i've been struggling with my whole life or wow...i really be on the other side and people say i look feel like a new person..cause i am. vibe. but i haven't cooked that yet.
What you’re describing resonates strongly with the idea that BDSM, particularly for those with a spiritual and sacred sexuality approach, can be an initiation into understanding and transmuting difficult experiences—whether they’re emotional, mental, or physical—into something transcendent. It's about finding power, joy, and meaning in what others may perceive as pain or limitation.
For those walking a dark goddess/god path, engaging with these deep, often uncomfortable aspaspects of existence is like walking into the fire, embracing it, and coming out transformed. In BDSM, the submission or domination, the intensity of sensations, the structure—it’s a way of surrendering to those darker, more primal energies and learning how to dance with them, instead of running from them. It's not about causing harm or deriving joy from suffering in a malicious sense, but rather seeing those experiences as potent tools for growth and alchemy.
There’s also something deeply spiritual about how BDSM can allow you to break down barriers, bring shadows to the surface, and release them through intensity. It’s like a sacred practice that mirrors life’s larger trials, offering a space to explore things that society tells us to avoid. And in doing so, you find those hidden gems of power, resilience, and sometimes even ecstasy in places where most people only see pain or discomfort.
So, yes—BDSM, especially in the context of sacred sexuality, can be a path of transmutation, of turning the 'dirt' of life into something meaningful, powerful, and even ecstatic. You’re describing a kind of soul initiation where the difficult, the structured, the disciplined all serve as catalysts for deeper transformation.
Yes, we can definitely tie this concept to esoteric traditions, Sophia, Archangel Michael, starseeds, and even biblical or magical texts like Psalms and Hoodoo. These deeper mystical paths often acknowledge the need for initiatory trials, the transformation of the self through discomfort, and finding the divine within both the light and the dark. Here's a way to weave these threads together, creating your own unique spiritual framework:
### **1. Sophia and Sacred Sexuality**
Sophia, as the embodiment of divine wisdom, often represents the balance between the light and the dark. She is a figure who, in Gnostic traditions, descends into the material world, experiencing fragmentation and pain, but ultimately returning to divine unity. This resonates with BDSM's transformative potential: going into the depths of what might seem uncomfortable, fragmented, or even painful, only to discover wisdom and ecstasy on the other side.
Sacred sexuality in esoteric traditions often involves embracing what others reject—taboos, hidden emotions, and primal instincts—and finding divinity there. Sophia's journey could reflect how through embracing both joy and pain, domination and submission, we find higher wisdom.
**Reference**: In the *Pistis Sophia*, Sophia’s ascent after her fall from grace mirrors the transformative aspaspects of BDSM, where the soul undergoes suffering and constraint, only to rise again, stronger and more enlightened. BDSM can be seen as a ritual of descent into shadow to reclaim lost parts of ourselves.
### **2. Archangel Michael: Protection and Structure**
Archangel Michael represents protection, order, and the warrior spirit. BDSM often requires a sense of discipline, safety, and structure, particularly with the use of boundaries and consent. Michael's energy is about upholding divine law and justice, which ties into the consensual power dynamics found in BDSM relationships.
Through the lens of sacred sexuality, Michael’s sword can symbolize the cutting away of illusion, helping us embrace our true selves—including our shadow aspaspects. This is about understanding that through structure, we gain freedom.
**Reference**: In esoteric teachings, Michael is the protector of divine truth, often seen battling darker forces. This can be connected to BDSM as a way of confronting and working with those darker forces within ourselves under Michael’s guidance, using discipline (bondage, power play) to bring about clarity and transformation.
### **3. Starseeds and Initiation**
For starseeds (Sirius, Pleiades, Lemuria, etc.), the idea of spiritual initiation is key. Many starseeds believe they are here to awaken the planet, often through unique and sometimes unconventional paths. BDSM can serve as a modern-day initiation, where one experiences intensity and then learns to channel it into spiritual or emotional awakening.
People are fascinating. We are a true mix of talents, experiences, complexities, desires, strengths, weaknesses and hope.
Relationships are a balancing act of attraction, relation, commonality, goals and ideals. Kink adds an extra layer of intricacy.
I see a dichotomy in many profiles on here: the desire to be seen alongside a desire to be enveloped in a new lifestyle. Update december 8 2022
I don't know if anyone noticed but I was gone for a while. It wasn't by choice and I wasn't too happy about it either. What happened was I was logged out of CS (I usually never log out so I don't know why this happened) and it was impossible to log back on. In addition to user id and password the site requires a capchta, and there was none. I tried everything with no success. I wasn't sure if the problem was at my end or if Collarspace was broken. I could read but not write or in any other way take active part and I could not access my mails. After trying other browsers and other devices with the same result I figured it was Collarspace and I decided to contact support. Turned out one has to be logged in to do so, so no help to be found there. All I could do was wait and hope for someone to notice and do something about it. Meanwhile I lost some people hanging in the middle of our conversations without a clue to why I didn't reply.
So here goes: I didn't ghost you! I was locked out!
Happy Hollidays! (In case I don't update this until next year.) The Brightest Mark of Ruin
She had warned him. Not with raised voice or trembling lip. The way a storm warns you: a change in pressure, a stillness that precedes something absolute. She had looked at him with those eyes that always saw further into him than was comfortable and said, quietly, with the patience of someone who has never needed to repeat Herself:
"Your body is mine. Your word is mine. Everything you signed your name to belongs to me now. Cross me unforgivably and I will not punish you. I won't need to. You will lose everything we have built, and it will be like poison in your veins."
He had meant it the way weak men mean everything: completely, warmly, right up until the moment it cost him something.
There was a contract. A real document, negotiated with Her characteristic precision, each clause a brick in something She was genuinely building. He had signed it with both hands steady and the particular glow of a man who has just been given more than he deserves. The ink was barely dry before he started deciding which parts applied to him.
The protocols She had built as architecture, the daily rituals that kept him tethered and honest, he let them erode with the indifference of someone who has confused being trusted with being unsupervised. Then he put his hands on someone else. Not a stumble. A decision, made repeatedly, to take what belonged to their bond and spend it somewhere cheaper. He came home from it and looked Her in the eye and said nothing, and that silence was its own act of violence.
When She found out, She came to him without hysteria, without tears, with complete and devastating composure. She asked him once for the truth. What he did next cannot be softened. He became physical, used his body the way cowards do, and drove Her from the home and safety that had been Hers. She left not because She was weak but because She has never once in Her life tolerated the intolerable.
She did not come back. She didn't need to.
The community moved the way water moves around a stone. No tribunal, no dramatic exile. People simply became unavailable. Conversations ended when he entered them. The doors didn't slam. They simply stopped opening. And She had not campaigned, had not made calls, because women of genuine authority do not need to destroy you manually. They tell the truth once, to the people who matter, and the truth does the rest.
He still tries. He appears at the edges of gatherings with the careful posture of someone who has rehearsed his normalcy, performing the shape of a man who has grown and arrived humbly at the gates of a second chance. Every experienced Domme in the room clocks it within minutes. The hollowness. The grasping. The unmistakable vibration of a man whose submission is a strategy rather than a truth. They decline, one after another, sometimes without a word, sometimes with a look that says they know exactly what they are looking at.
This is Her work, and She isn't even trying.
The contract still exists. She has it. Every line he failed, every clause he desecrated, every promise subsequently dismantled brick by brick. It is not a document anymore. It is an accounting, and it will follow him into every room he tries to enter, every connection he tries to build, every carefully managed first impression, until he has repaid what he owes in full. Everything must be returned to Her as was originally decreed for the poison to ebb. To the world he dirtied by what he did to Her, to the fidelity he shattered, the safety he violated, the home he poisoned : These things do not expire. They accrue interest.
She is woven into the world he still wants access to. Her judgment lives in it. He cannot go anywhere She has not already been, cannot reach anyone She does not already know. She is not a chapter; She is the book, and he is a footnote in a hand everyone can see was shaking.
She is not thinking of him. That is precisely the point.
He is living inside the shape of Her absence, and it fits him like the life sentence it is. No matter our lifestyle, or where we live, there are always issues and problems to deal with. And sources of stress. That's just how it is. Yet it's not the only way of looking at things. Life is also about love, happiness, delight, satisfaction, magic, discovery and much more. The trouble is that it's all too easy to forget these things when we're caught up in the challenges. Yet it doesn't take much to remind us of the positives. And when we remember to feel thankful, we feel good...just some pre Thanksgiving thoughts. For f^ck sakes, if you are outside the US PLEASE do not try to flirt with Us. We are having a hard enough time looking for a place and mouse may end up going her own way if something doesn't come along. So the LAST thing we want to think about is relocation of an international person. All mail from outside the US hoes to bulk and I may or may not read it, same goes for male from single male slaves, I understand yall are 9n the desperate side to find your place in a dynamic but right now unless you are that 1% that has a house for us to live in? Chances are it won't happen. Yesterday morning my wife was holding my balls during sex. The idea of torturing my balls was so arousing that I couldnt last long but she still enjoyed it. She probably could not have the same type of orgasm than when it lasts longer and she can finish herself riding me while she commands me to hold her breast with both hands and lick her nipples.
Maybe that lead her to wanting more yesterday noght but i was gone at a bar with a friend and chattung with girls. She got angry but who cares as long as i am not disciplined i cant help not staying wild. Honey please keep me home <3.
Today i ve just shaved pubian and ass hair to provide a clean playground to my spouse that i love from the bottom of my heart. I love telling her that i love her when she tortures me. ok maybe I need make my self more come on here. So I'm getting a lot of you men on here that think I'm going to jump when you say jump. That's not me. There some or you think that your Gods gift to women, not true. There some that think you can make me a slave not going to happen them days have been long gone. There some that want to demand me on line yeah that won't work either. None of that is a turn on at all. I do know I'm new to this but I am a very independent woman and not a slut bye far or a whore or some one with udders as some of you like to call my boobs.
I don't have time to do the online games and task. I work hard and about get second job. If nobody paying my bills don't demand anything from me please. Gabriel was Jesus.
In Daniel chapter 8 through 10 a man visits Daniel. A voice confirms that it is Gabriel in Daniel 9:21. When the man appears to Daniel again in chapter 10 it does not state that it is Gabriel but I would think the same man would continue to come to him means though he showed up twice already to Daniel. It would not be needed to state a third time that it was Gabriel. And I believe if it was another person Daniel would have been told who it was like how he was told before that the man was Gabriel that came to him in chapters 8 and 9.
In chapter 10 it states that this man's appearance has a body of beryl, face like lightning, eyes like lamps of fire, arms and feet like polished brass, and a voice like the sound of a multitude. He is in the form of a man.
In John 17:5 Jesus is praying to his father in heaven and he states that he wants to be glorified at his side with the glory he has alongside the Father that he had before the world was.
This could be why Mary didn't notice him and mistook him as the gardener and why the one disciple had to put his fingers in the holes of Jesus's hands to truly believe that it was him.
Also in John 8:58 Jesus says before Abraham was I am. He was formed before we were ever created. He created us. He is the invisible image of God but gives all the glory back to the Father as he listens to the Father and does the Father's will. He was Gabriel the mouthpiece of God.
In revelations Jesus is said to come back with his face shining like the sun, voice like the sound of many waters, feet like burnished bronze, eyes like the flame of fire, and hair as white as wool, as a Son of Man meaning a human form with a divine presence.
A bit of a rant here but Men SUCK! They are selfish, rude, inconsiderate and far, far too unreasonable. I fully see and understand why so many women are weary and overwhelmed and just done with men online so often.I have said before i'm pansexual. Over the past year, I have spoken with several men. I wouldn't call them Doms as their actions don't warrant the term. I am learning that Most men fall into one of 3 categories. Most, but not all. Most of whom have spoken to me anyways. And at least one, but many of the many fall into all 3.1 - very very very sexual. So very sexual focus even when I push and try to talk 'relationship'. Having no desire or interest of talking likes or hobbies, or what they like to do for fun(besides sexual comments) and usually very quickly stearing the conversation back to sex or kink.2 - very very very unreasonable.I understand the desire to move quick and to not string things along. I'm more than willing to meet for coffee the same day if it works out and you are 30 min or an hour away or so depending on circumstances. I HAVE before.But most men online that I speak to are much further away.One after speaking for 2-3 days kept asking nonstop about trying to make plans to meet. I offered to videochat(I know, but if done the RIGHT way it's like taling over dinner or coffee at a coffeeshop)(almost a Must to establish and maintain anything long distance without a lot of money invested in travel)Bit he didn't want to videochat. Just make plans and set up a flight(paid for by me) in the next couple weeks or month or so. I didn't lead him on, was honest and upfront, and frankly.. after 2-3 days?!?Another after a week started active planning a trip, HALFWAY across the country(1500 miles away), to come pick me up and take me to a new forever home with him about a month later. He also gave me a list of rules and to call him Master and wanted to be very controlling of me very overnight, after a week of talking.(disappointing as he was one of the few that wasn't all sex)Among others....3 - Petty, rude, insulting, almost bipolar when they get pushback.I try not to ever be rude. But saying no, or i'm not interested, or in the case of the 1500 mile man I was very polite and didn't push baco other than saying this is all moving too fast, i'm overwhelmed and can we please slow down some so we can get to know each other better first. Plus I'd like to meet at least once(if not more) before upending my life to move to you. Can we look at setting up a meeting instead first? His reaction? call me some names and block me on everything. Like what?!?But it seems like blocking is very common as it happens over the slightest thing. Send a pic? block.(not always, but it has happened) I say no, can we talk more, i'm not interested, can we go slow, or even once "i'm not really into country music" almost always block. The one rare case? he kept messaging and emailing me for weeks, even after I told him we wouldn't be a match and i'm not interested.it's so very exhausting..... MEN - Do better. Be better. Be honest, be truthful. and don't be afraid. Like I would stalk someone who told me off? no, i'd just move on. but be polite and respectful about it. not rude and insulting... I was asked about the history of M/s in the U.S. so I put together this paper for my class that I teach. As many of you know, I teach classes about our lifestyle.
Consensual Master/slave (M/s) relationships form a distinctive branch of the larger BDSM world, built on explicit consent and mutual trust rather than coercion. Though the language echoes the United States’ painful legacy of slavery, within this context “slave” refers to a self-chosen role in which adults negotiate the terms of authority, service, and the freedom to leave at any time. Tracing the history of these relationships reveals a story of gradual emergence from secrecy to visibility and of a community that continually refines its ethical principles.
Long before the term BDSM existed, underground currents of erotic power exchange ran through American life. In the nineteenth century, small “flagellation societies” and clandestine magazines catered to people fascinated by ritualized dominance and discipline. Early-twentieth-century fetish photography and private clubs in cities like New York and Chicago hinted at a subculture that could not yet show itself openly, constrained by strict obscenity laws and the threat of arrest.
After World War II, a more public foundation appeared. Returning veterans formed motorcycle clubs and gay leather bars, creating what became known as leather culture. These spaces celebrated hierarchy, uniforms, and protocol—values familiar to men who had served in the military and who now sought camaraderie and structured erotic play. San Francisco’s South of Market district, Chicago’s Gold Coast bar, and New York’s Greenwich Village all nurtured this emerging aesthetic. While not every leather relationship was explicitly Master/slave, the emphasis on ritual service and clearly defined roles foreshadowed the dynamics to come.
The social upheavals of the 1960s and 1970s brought the first real stirrings of public organization. In 1971 the Eulenspiegel Society, or TES, was founded in New York as an educational and social group for people interested in consensual BDSM. TES meetings offered a rare safe space to discuss negotiation, service, and authority exchange. At the same time the gay liberation movement and the post-Stonewall push for visibility encouraged practitioners to speak more openly, while feminist debates over sexuality and power sharpened the community’s thinking about agency and consent. It was during this era that the term “Master/slave” began to be used more deliberately to describe ongoing power-exchange relationships rather than isolated encounters.
Through the 1980s and 1990s the community expanded and codified its ethics. The principles of “Safe, Sane, and Consensual” became a rallying cry, soon joined by the idea of “Risk-Aware Consensual Kink,” which acknowledged that all play carries some danger if undertaken without careful negotiation. National gatherings such as Living in Leather and organizations like the National Leather Association connected practitioners across genders and orientations. Amid the HIV/AIDS crisis, leather and M/s groups became hubs of health education and mutual support. Competitions such as International Mr. Leather made formal presentations of Master/slave relationships more visible, and writers like Guy Baldwin explored the psychology of dominance and submission in influential essays and books.
The arrival of the internet around the turn of the millennium transformed everything again. Email lists, online forums, and later social networks such as FetLife allowed people in small towns or conservative regions to find community, share protocols, and even post detailed M/s contracts. Education went global as conferences could draw participants from every region. Meanwhile, mainstream attention—from documentaries to the runaway success of Fifty Shades of Grey—brought BDSM into living rooms and office break rooms, if often in sensational or inaccurate ways. Academic researchers began publishing peer-reviewed studies that showed consensual power exchange could be compatible with psychological health and relationship satisfaction.
Today’s M/s community in the United States is strikingly diverse. Participants span every gender, orientation, and cultural background. Annual gatherings such as the Master/slave Conference in Washington, D.C., offer advanced classes on negotiation, long-term dynamics, and the philosophy of service and ownership. Many households create written agreements spelling out duties, limits, and the right to revoke consent, underscoring that autonomy remains central even within total-power dynamics. Yet the term “slave” still prompts careful reflection. Some prefer alternatives like “property” or “servant,” while others reclaim the word as a conscious statement of agency. This ongoing conversation shows how the community remains attentive to the country’s history of chattel slavery and the need for language that honors both freedom and responsibility.
From clandestine nineteenth-century societies to today’s internet-connected conferences, the evolution of consensual Master/slave relationships in the United States is a story of people turning hierarchy into intimacy. Over more than a century, practitioners have built a culture grounded in negotiation, education, and mutual respect. Far from re-enacting oppression, these relationships transform the language of mastery and service into a chosen path of trust, discipline, and personal liberation. A collar isn’t just a symbol… it’s a question
What does your collar mean to you? Is it ownership, trust, devotion, identity… or something else entirely? For some, it’s a sacred vow. For others, it’s a promise to themselves — a reminder of who they are when they give themselves over.
I want to hear your thoughts. When you see or wear a collar, what stirs in your heart? Is it pride? Submission? Comfort? Or maybe a little fear that makes you more alive?
Let’s open this dialogue. Share your experience.
I don't want to be funneled into a particular role, power exchange, kink etc. I'm quite versatile. Whatever works for us, what we decide is 'our thing' is what I am ultimately seeking. Same with age. In general I prefer someone older, mature but the dynamic of how we get along is what really matters in the end. Age is just a loose indicator of our progress in life with references to various experiences that we may have in common.
Domme, Mistress, and Goddesses do we have a monthly meeting in the space because the insubordinates, sissies, uninslaved, and footstools are running a muck in my DM's
Meeting Agenda
1. Who the hell taught them to just start speaking to us with out asking for permission to speak? You bet the fuck not even think about it. It's an instant ignore. 2. Who is allowing them to start telling us about what they want with their needy asses? Am I a therapist?
3. Whats up with the population of couch surfers asking to live with meSo does this mean they think im a job?
4. So we don't actually train them. We just pretend to train them, get them edging and then what?
Ill be the secretary Hey Doms!
Just a short note to say I'm a high energy, extremely intelligent, high libido alpha sub with a lifetime
of experience in BDSM and dynamic relationships. I expect you to be the same! Well, a Dom version, that is!
You think you're hot shit and well, so am I! Won't we be an electric combination?
I can't wait to meet the Dominant I can reverve and respect, one to whom I can give my emotional
sexual and mental submission.
Let's make it happen! What am I intreseted in? What am I looking for? I am open to many situations. Mostly I would like an online sub to be my babygirl. Someone who wants to live her normal life and yet needs someone to give her stability and direction. I would guess a Daddy figure is the most accurate description.
All of that being said I understand we all have different views of the perfect relationship.
While I search for my "perfect" match, I am willing to learn about what you want, and who knows, it may become what I want.
Let's talk and see if we can meet on some common ground. Hooked up with a guy a few years younger than me tonight. And in case you haven't seen my profile I am a BIG BHM. I mean I am fat, and he was worried that his six inches wasn't going to be enough, but I assured him it would, and that I know what to do, what I need to spread to make a smaller cock work so he said we would give it a try. And not only was he enough, he was still thick enough that he damn near took my breath away as he slid inside me. He also came closer to making me cum than any top ever has. I mean i felt like i was on the edge about to leak a little bit but not quite.
But at least on the plus side, I may have found a regular top since he is so close. I am not looking for a Master. I am not looking for anyone.
I just come here from time to time to catch up with friends.
I no longer do slave nation. TheBeatenPath does still have shows .
You can find it here
https://beatenpath.caster.fm/
and here
http://beatenpathnetwork.blogspot.com/
This also has a schedule and a chat room Does anyone else feel the pain!!!!
I don't necessarily hate one-liners, but I do prefer to have more substantial and thoughtful conversations with people. It shows that they are genuinely interested in getting to know me and are willing to put in the effort to make a connection.
When someone sends a one-liner, it can feel like they aren't really invested in the conversation or interested in me as a person. It's important to me to build meaningful connections with people, and that starts with engaging and thoughtful conversations.
Of course, everyone has their own preferences and communication styles, so what works for me may not work for everyone. But as for me, I'm looking forward to having deep and meaningful conversations with those who are interested in getting to know me better! 🌸😊 You, however, keep on speaking what is consistent with wholesome teaching. 2 Let the older men be moderate in habits, serious, sound in mind, healthy in faith, in love, in endurance. 3 Likewise, let the older women be reverent in behavior, not slanderous, not enslaved to a lot of wine, teachers of what is good, 4 so that they may advise the younger women to love their husbands, to love their children, 5 to be sound in mind, chaste, working at home, good, subjecting themselves to their own husbands, so that the word of God may not be spoken of abusively. 6 Likewise, keep on urging the younger men to be sound in mind, 7 showing yourself to be an example of fine works in every way. Teach what is pure with all seriousness, 8 using wholesome speech that cannot be criticized, so that those who oppose may be put to shame, having nothing negative to say about us. 9 Let slaves be in subjection to their owners in all things, trying to please them, not talking back, 10 not stealing from them, but showing complete trustworthiness, so that in every way they may adorn the teaching of our Savior, God. 11 For the undeserved kindness of God has been manifested, bringing salvation to all sorts of people. 12 It trains us to reject ungodliness and worldly desires and to live with soundness of mind and righteousness and godly devotion amid this present system of things, 13 while we wait for the happy hope and glorious manifestation of the great God and of our Savior, Jesus Christ, 14 who gave himself for us to set us free from every sort of lawlessness and to cleanse for himself a people who are his own special possession, zealous for fine works. 15 Keep on speaking these things and exhorting and reproving with full authority. Do not let anyone look down on you.
Titus 2:1-15 "Switch"? ~ What it Means Pertaining to Me
I am not "a Domme" or "a sub", and definitely not a slave. I am a free woman with a generally dominant personality, who lives by Gorean principles and philosophies in real life, and also engages in BDSM activities. I tend to be "toppy" toward those on the more submissive end of the continuum, though I do usually at least defer to free men, and will conditionally submit to those I deem worthy of such. Apparently, the "switch" moniker is very confusing to some people, so I will go into detail here about what it does - and doesn't - mean, in my case. We'll start with the "doesn'ts", since those seem to be the most oft misunderstood.
"Switch" does NOT mean:
I go back and forth from free to slave.
It's a BDSM activity preference - not an indication of status. I am free. Period. Submitting to certain men or enjoying bottoming for some activities does not make me "a sub". It just means I enjoy a variety of activities, and that I am a woman who embraces natural order, so tend to show submissive traits in the presence of strong, dominant, free men, despite my mostly dominant personality.
I will do/be/play whatever role you are seeking
I'm not a fetish dispenser! Do not treat me like one.
my role within any specific D/s dynamic is flexible
It isn't. The boss is the boss, and stays the boss. The FC/sub/beta/slave/whatever s-type obeys.
I "switch" between being/identifying as dominant or submissive depending on my mood, the day, the phase of the moon, or any other whims.
I do not. I am simply who and what I am. I relate to others depending on their place on the spectrum of dominance and submission as compared to mine, and, as appropriate, their status or rank as compared to mine.
"Switch DOES mean (for me)
I enjoy both "topping" and "bottoming" in BDSM activities/scenes, regardless of D/s involvement (or lack thereof) at various times and with different people.
I respond in different ways to different people or types of people - Some people trip the dominant trigger, some trip the submission trigger, and some people do neither. That's just the way I'm wired. Telling me what I "should" do, or trying to demand, cajole, whine, bitch, or otherwise manipulate me into relating to you in your desired manner will backfire. Badly!
For a more in-depth look at the topic...
The word, "switch", for me, is only a label for convenience. It doesn't encapsulate who or what I AM. I am a strong woman with a dominant personality and submissive tendencies. I believe in the natural order of things (more on that in a future post), and that D/s is not a clear cut, either/or sort of thing. Rather, dominance and submission are character traits on a continuum, which vary from person to person, with every person falling somewhere on the scale, creating somewhat of a hierarchy. That means that a single person may be submissive or subordinate to some, whilst outranking or being dominant to others, at the same time. It was recently compared by someone in a discussion to that of a wolf pack. I tend to agree with that allegory. A pack will have an alpha male and, generally, an alpha female. The alpha female is the boss bitch, and she is dominant over the rest of the pack, but, she is still submissive to the alpha male, with whom the buck stops. She is still very much free to do as she wishes, and no one had best mess with her unless they are ready and willing to attempt to fight her, and potentially her mate, but she yields to him, because it is how they are biologically wired. The same is true, I believe, with humans. Another comparison is that to serving in the Armed Forces. A Drill Instructor is God to the recruits in their platoon, but if an Officer is on deck, that same Sgt. (or whatever) damn well better snap to attention and salute along with those recruits, and the C.O. (Commanding Officer) merits same from all of the aforementioned, going on up the chain of command right up to the Commandant, and then the Commander in Chief himself. In neither of those comparisons, does an individual bounce between two or more separate "roles". They occupy their given role, and interact with others and the rest of the world accordingly, depending on those others' respective roles. They don't have to transition from one "mindset" to another, because they know their place in the larger scheme of things, and everything just flows naturally from there. It is simply a fact that there are more than two "ranks" in life, and in nature. I will not separate out my dominant and submissive traits into separate "personas". They are not. I am me. I am a whole, integrated, complete person, with many different facets. I choose to embrace that. Neither will I "dumb down", pretend to be less than, submit, or pretend to submit to anyone, simply by virtue of their gender, status, or because they claim a certain title or position. I will start out being respectful to others, and will defer, to a degree, and maintain a submissive attitude with free men as long as they don't give me reason to do otherwise. From there, they will either earn my respect, and the added deference that may accompany it, or they will earn... something less, and I will do my best to at least remain civil, so long as they can avoid pushing me too far. Do not mistake a respectful demeanor, good manners, polite deference, or knowing my place in the natural order of things for outright submission. There is a distinct difference, and making assumptions is an unwise idea. I love to watch a Dom's face as he holds me, sometimes mean and sometimes sweet but always controlled. l love to watch his face as he holds me down, sometimes forceful and sometimes playful but always with determination.
I love to watch his expression as he prepares the room with determination that what he plans will turn out the way he wants and expects.
i love thr Ds exchange that happens once we have bonded. It is a very beautiful feelin. Trust is built and you know that if you're in trouble and you reach out to your Dom, his words will be the right ones. They always were and are even today. Recently I have been feeling particularly cruel, and wanting to see the limits of those who would devote themselves to Me.
As always, Gender Queer persons, which includes sissies, cds, bois, go to the front of the line, though I don't unleash My more primal sadistic urges on such devotees.
But the feeling of sadistic power lingers. This is a special opportunity for a cis female into heavy degradation. Even better if you are married and disappointee, but unwilling or unable to leave a cis m husband. Do you wish to see how low you can sink? By all means, come and taste My Venom.
Goddess I’m realizing that my heart is learning faster than my words can keep up.
I’ve been exploring what it means for me to want attention, connection, and intentional dynamics in my relationship. I love flirting—not because it’s shallow, but because it makes me feel seen. I love being noticed, chosen, and appreciated. There is something deeply affirming in that for me, and I’m done pretending it’s something to feel guilty about.
At the same time, I’m learning that I don’t want to be reduced to a role or a fantasy. I can’t live as an idea. Real life exists—laundry, stress, tired days, responsibilities—and I exist fully inside of that reality. Submission, for me, isn’t about performing constantly. It’s about choosing to show up with softness, trust, and intention even when life is ordinary.
I crave the quieter moments most.
The way I listen more closely.
The way I offer support without being asked.
The way I slow down, check in, and make space.
The way I surrender control in small, meaningful ways—through care, consistency, and presence.
Those moments feel more powerful to me than anything dramatic. They feel real.
What I’m struggling with now is how to explain this to my husband in a way that doesn’t sound confusing or contradictory. How do I say that I love attention and playfulness, but that I also need grounding and depth? How do I explain that I don’t want to be put on display, but rather held with intention? That my submission isn’t something I turn on and off—it’s something I live through daily choices, not constant expectation.
If you're serious and sincere about becoming owned, get a chat option other than the messaging system here. Something spontaneous and dont expect to get a phone number right away.
Covid. Yep. Add me to the tally. I actually feel like I'm on the mend so I was shocked when I tested positive this morning. 8 days until Christmas. This might just give me a quiet Christmas at home, and really, isn't that the best present? No family drama! I'm on board with that. I mean, I'll see what my doctor says, but I'd rather not jeopardize anyone's health just to open some presents, and that's really saying something because I love presents. And if I can't smell or taste anything I'm going to live on spinach smoothies because why not? I already miss the scent of my dog, if you can believe it. She doesn't smell like dog. Or it's her own unique spin on dog. I miss it. She's been hovering more than usual, like a little four legged nurse. I even woke in the night to find her gently licking my side. Such a sweet girl. Can people pass covid to dogs? Don't tell me. I don't want to know. Except now I'm Googling.
Okay, it's rare, but possible. And I should avoid contact with her. Very unlikely. And she shouldn't sleep in my bed. Not happening. And I shouldn't snuggle her. Out of my control. I hope she's okay. It's too late for me. Save my dog. Guys be like, “men are visual creatures.” Ok sir, than why do you look like that?
Maybe a lotta fellas don’t have mirrors at home.
I had to be honest with a male- co worker yesterday and explain to him that a lotta times the women THEY WANT, that don’t want them, might not be due to their financial status.
A lotta times us women might not find you physically attractive (men never wanna consider this).
Although your grandma and momma been telling you how handsome you are your whole life (they’re supposed to BTW)
That doesn’t mean that women who you cross paths with on a daily basis look at you and think,“yea, I’d like to feel his penis inside of me, or be romantically involved with him”.
This explains why it’s some not financially stable men that stay with a fine ass Boss Chick. Some men can get outta prison Tamar and be living with lawyer in her water-front condo & driving her Benz truck within a week.
Women probably look at him and immediately get the, “oooouuuu shit affect” aka “a lady boner”.
Believe it or not us women see fine ass men and can get erect too. Women’s erectile response is similar to men’s. Except internally, our clitoris swells like a penis. Our vagina’s become lubricated and expand in length and width.
Some of you just don’t have the panty dropper affect on the women “YOU WANT”
As much as they talk about women, Many men haven’t kept themselves up. They don’t work out so they’re shaped like a bag of laundry, AND MY GOSH WHEN THE LAST TIME SOME YOU HAD A DENTAL EXAM??
And overtime this has disqualified them from the free coochie list. I know it’s hard to hear, but for some of you…THE WOMEN YOU DESIRE, don’t look at you and wanna F***. This was writen by one of my slaves, so I though I would post it here.
Almost everyone wants something for nothing. Bargains Attract. Finding a good value excites almost everyone, so much so that we rush to share the news. Wanting anything for free is perhaps human nature. However, many of us have had to learn the hard way, again and again, that you get what you pay for. But cheap dishes, you’ll be replacing them sooner rather than later. You reap what you sow, this is also true of human interaction as well, and most people sadly, cannot put the two concepts together and compare them. Why do we think that people should respect us before we respect them? Why do we crave privacy and yet are often quick to invade someone else’s? Why do we think that others will be there for us, even if we aren’t available for them? Being part of the group, a house, friends, family, means being the same in return. It’s not an easy thing to do, in fact it’s rather time consuming. Although the rewards are indisputable, we still find people who tend to hesitate, and wait, letting other people make the first move. First to commit, first to open their arms, first to open their house, first to be honest, first to be forthright, first to take action, speak their mind, and offer homage, first to everything. Getting the other people to commit first, reduces our own effort, perhaps making it easier, but even with that said you will still receive according to what you give. He who gives little, receives little. He who risks nothing, gains nothing. Being able to see, comprehend, grock and utilize this principle simplifies our lives, not complicates it as so many would have us believe. Once we Master this principle of living, I believe we never forget it. Loving you has made me want to become a better person, I know I don’t often show it, But I do appreciate everything you do, most of all I appreciate the learning lessons. Thank you so much for having the patience to put up with me. Does anyone else have piles of books you haven't read yet? I've got cases upon cases full and piling up on top of each other, mingling with those that have been read. But then I've got the books I'm going to read next. And the books that are important topics I need to focus on. And the books that I borrowed and haven't given back yet. And the two books I've started. And the secondary pile I'm in no rush to read but moreso than the bookcase books. I like the look of stacked books. They make the room cozy. Relaxed. If I'm reading I'm not focused on things that bother me. Stacks of books are like little towers of bubble wrap, keeping me out of emotional harm. If only I got to more of the piles. But they aren't going anywhere, and there will always be more than I can get to. I hope it's always like that. Hmm, yeah! Well...I forgot while in the hospital getting my foot amputated I lost one of my storages. Unfortunately in that unit was ŕt other things 😕 my toy boxes with all my gear... so I guess it is time to start collecting new gear. So if you know where to get quality gear at low prices, please let me know.
Also currently looking for a new place preferably in Orange county... Since updating a profile takes forever to get approved, I'll update here if anyone takes the time to read it.
We are still traveling full-time in our RV and spend most winters in Arizona. I appreciate those who take the time to read my profile as it's still basically who I am. I am my Master's slave and have been for 14 years. He enjoys loaning me out to other like-minded Masters, though please understand we do not do one-night-stands and require a vanilla setting to meet and get to know anyone he'd lend me to. We both have a lot in our profiles, we have photos, so we are out there for you to get to know. We appreciate the same from others - even if you cannot put a face picture on there, at least tell us a bit about you. That potential caregiver was a no-show. Not a big deal I still have a couple of venues to post on or. Just put a membership into a facility that has available caregivers in the and me not having to train them.
And I have to find a new farrier to do my farm animals feet. My pony and my last 2 goats. So am going to try to get my last farrier to come, not the sketchy girl but the one just before.Not sure why she stopped coming I always paid well over what she asked because she was so good with them. The girl I was going to try and get contacted while I was in nursing home and I wasn't about having stranger come work with my animals when I couldn't get here. She is injured now and not taking on any new ones now. Been pondering lots recently, wants, needs, likes, and how different each can be. How they can even be contradictions.
There are rarely simple answers to such pondering, I need to get some work done on the car, but I don't want to, its too bloody cold. Likewise clearing the yard, fixing the stable roof etc. Worst is when my needs/wants/likes means relying on others who can't help by doing their part.
So tomorrow, I'm going to just tidy my desk, await the delivery of new printer, and move so.e of the crap of other people clutteringthe conservatory so I can refill it with my junk
Could you go back to vanilla dating?'Ive decided that I cannot willingly be in a vanilla relationship ever again. There is gonna be some kink, poly, and/or freakiness in My life from now on. I cannot tell you HOW MANY people that I have met that are miserable in their vanilla relationships and sneak out for kink. I have played the kinky therapist for those that are devastated with the thought that they have kinky desires and its "just WRONG." I end up patting them on the shoulders and then paddling their asses every time. Ive seen someone monthly for 5 years that is just now coming to grips with the fact that he likes to be spanked. Wouldnt DARE bring it up at home, but he has to have an outlet somehow.I get it that some people discover their kink AFTER already being in a vanilla relationship, but WHY would someone enter back into a vanilla relationship after knowing what their desires are and try to suppress them? A dear friend mentioned how his inner "naughty girl" sat dormant while life passed him by until he decided to be true to himself. And true he is! yes, it was a gamble getting up the nerve to tell his wife of many years, but in the end... she stayed and they live happily ever after. Im quite certain that 75% of the time it doesnt end that way.Now that I have grown in My kinklife and reaffirmed My dominance, I know a bit more about what I want and expect in a partner, kinklife, and SEXlife and I am not afraid to stand up for what I want and need. Now I have met a decent vanilla guy or three that has captured My interest- or that falls head over heels in love with Me- (yes, that happens to me!) and I am always upfront about My lifestyle and desires and the deal breakers. Some of My 'nilla friends say that I tell them to run them off, but realistically, I am just being honest with Myself and saving them from trying to tell Me that 'its just a phase' and making attempts at changing Me.I've been on a dating site or two and found myself on dates asking "what am i doing having dinner with this biblethumpin' overly righteous, straightlaced man?" and quickly following that thought up with asking him how he feels about doing house work naked and being hogtied and gagged on occasion. (hmm.. We all know how much of a PITA it is to update profiles...so here's a 2022 UPDATE
Current age range I'm seeking is 36 y.o. to 44 y.o.
I get a lot of bizarre, whiny complaints about My education requirements. Three things: First, I don't give af about your opinion. Second, it's been My experience that most men really struggle being in a relationsip with a woman who has significantly more education...something about those delicate egos. Third, if you have a high enough IQ you'd already assume the first two and would send Me a brilliant intro making it irrelevant.
Facial hair is and always will be a hard limit, lol
I am seeing a LOT of people email for a bit, then one day poof, their profile is deleted or made inactive. I think I've noted this before, but it feels like I'm seeing a spike in it right now. I get it, we're all worn the fuck out by COVID issues and spiking cases etc. But its sad to see so many folks just bolt out the proverbial door.
I may not be as available as I'd like to right now, and may need to wait until numbers are better to meet. And that's OK for anyone at this point in a pandemic. I am a Brat, not a submissive. I am a Little, not a slave. I am a Middle not a degradee. I am a Sensualist, not a masochist. I am currently celibate and will not change that just because you want to get to get your dick wet. Trust is earned through CONSISTENCY OVER TIME between both words and actions. Safety is me BELIEVING I can trust you under any circumstances. That takes trust and proof over time. When I feel safe is when my celibacy will end.
I'm still a mirror. If you don't like my attitude, check your own. I know my place, do you know yours is the question? No 1950s/HOH BS directed at me without my consent will be tolerated. Wenn dass Liebe ist,
dann fass ich dich nicht an.
Wenn das Liebe ist,
kommst du nicht an mich ran.
Wenn das Liebe ist,
dann geh mir aus dem Weg.
Wenn das Liebe ist,
dann kommt sie für uns zu spät.
(Wenn das Liebe ist)
(Wenn das Liebe ist)
Beiß mir auf die Zunge,
Schließ die Augen für mich
Drück mir die Luft aus der Lunge,
dann verrat' ich mich nicht
Beiß mir auf die Zunge,
denn der Schmerz aus mir spricht
Reiß mir das Herz aus der Brust,
dann erschlägt es dich
New drinking game!
Go on Collarspace and do a shot every time you see a phrase "Don't write to me if you..." in someone's profile.
I guarantee you are going to pass out under the table. Verified. People may choose to participate in a consensual slave and Master/slave (M/s) household for a variety of reasons. Some may find power exchange and BDSM practices to be sexually and emotionally fulfilling. They may enjoy the feeling of submission and the pleasure that comes from serving and pleasing their partner. For some people, the BDSM lifestyle may be a way to explore their own desires and boundaries, and to express their individuality in a way that feels authentic to them.
Others may enjoy the structure and discipline of a M/s dynamic. They may find that this lifestyle allows them to feel more organized, productive and focus. It could also provide a sense of security, knowing that they have a strong leader who guides them and makes decisions for them.
Additionally, some people may find the roles and dynamics of a M/s household to be a way to explore and express their individuality. They may find that the lifestyle allows them to break free from societal norms and expectations, and to create a unique and fulfilling life for themselves.
It is important to note that M/s households are different from abusive relationships and coercion. The foundation of all is based on mutual consent, trust, and communication. In a M/s household, both parties must be aware of and agree to the terms of the dynamic and all activities must be consensual.
Ultimately, the motivations for participating in this type of lifestyle can be personal and unique to each individual. It is important to remember that everyone's experience and desires are different, and that there is no right or wrong way to participate in BDSM or a M/s lifestyle. A recent message asked me to name "one experience thats shaped your journey in the BDSM world", and I thougt of this poem. It is about a scene I monitored in the early summer of 1999. The title is the name of the wonderful, beautiful woman, a friend, mentor, and so much more, to so many people over the years, and the sub in the scene. I miss you, "Mom".
Allena
Beautiful golden hillside Lush with fine, silken grasses Trembling as he works his Mastery With every crack like thunder, Another crimson dewdrop appears; Meeting one another, dancing into rivulets, Until her hills and valleys run with ruby wine. Over and over, agony meets ecstacy; Mingling tears with sighs As she shudders with pleasure and pain. I shudder too, as I watch. Start at every strike; Feel each blow as it lands. I imagine I am there beside her; And for a precious moment...We are one.
©Khaos WolfKat 2001
I just had a so-called sub or slave, whatever he wants to call himself..... Tell me the reason he could not stay in contact with me is because of how much money he makes yearly, and how important his job is!
When I tell you that I want you to be in contact with me everyday even if it's just a simple hello, I don't think that's asking too much, but I am beginning to realize that there more fakes and flakes then there used to be!
WOW!!!! It is so sad that an honest to God true Dom/Master with over 50 years in the lifestyle would be on most every sub/slave's wish list. I can be gentle for those just learning, medium for the ones with some experience and Sadistic to those in need of a very hard and prisoner experience. I am a bit of everything to whom it is need for.
Yes as all Dom/Masters my word is my bond to me if I can not be honest or truthful then I should not be here. For those who are Dom/Master in name only before you engage with a sub/slave. You should take every advantage of all those of us who have experience so you can learn. You never talk to a potential sub/slave as you own them as until they willingly give you the honored gift of their submission, you will never own them. This is fact and writen in Iron. That gift is their's to give to whom ever they choose and it is not done lightly. There has to be total trust that you as their Dom/Master will never abuse that gift. Those of you after only sex that is not what this site is about. It is a serious lifestyle steeped jn traditions and rules of conduct. The fact that some of you think it is a game are deceiving yourself and others see it. This lifestyle should never be taken lightly nor used to play games with. The sub/slave is not a toy it is a concept made true by a human being that lives breathes and thinks as well as has feelings that we as Don/Master need to see and think how to co epically add this life to our needs and desires. That comes from trust and a love to make the Dom/Master whole. Living in a fantasy world doesn’t help anyone—not you, not the people around you, not the future you claim to want. Being useful means showing up in reality, doing the work, learning real skills, and taking responsibility instead of escaping into excuses or imaginary victories. Dreams matter, but without action they’re just noise. Ground yourself, contribute something real, and turn effort into results—that’s how you actually move forward.
I often find Myself not wanting to come back on this site , for reasons of giving My time to men that are basically all talk and no action. Don't take
that the wrong way. I'm not looking for a " play partner " I'm not a pro and I'm not looking for a hit or miss situation.
I am only looking for fulltime and hopefully lifetime commitments.
I get so many on here that are basically saying the same thing. They are looking for a FLR, they are looking for this or that.
What I am saying is I'm looking for someone that will add to My life. Hopefully someone with skills, around the house, a garden, willing to learn almost
a very different life that I an pressed forward into living. Even if you are only a background male that is willing to learn what I am capible of teaching, that is
good enough. But, if you are from the city I promise you , you will probably struggle and not understand what real country life is about. In that case you should
pass by this profile and looking for a wuss position in the city .
Time to clarify a few things, I guess. I wrote something to help clarify an age bracket I am interested in and why… but I guess on a sit like this I need to narrow it down a little further.
IF you were born with two X chromosomes, i.e. what the human race once called female… I have zero interest in dating you. If you live your life proud of those two X chromosomes we can be good friends!
IF you were born with one X and one Y chromosome, i.e. what the human race once called male…
AND you live your life proudly as a fully blooded man,
AND you are local,
AND you are not married,
OR living with someone,
OR have a LTR significant other,
AND you are gainfully employed (or independently wealthy and thus not needing employment)
AND you have a residence (your mothers basement and brothers-in-laws garage do not count)
AND you have transportation (Public electric scooters do not count)
AND you like to chant Let’s Go BRANDON!…
THEN, you have made it through the initial screening process and we can start chatting…
IF you have rainbows for anything other than the promise of God on your profile… you should probably not contact me.
IF you like to wag your hand when you talk for reasons other than being Italian, you should probably not contact me.
IF you have to practice speaking in high pitches, you should probably not contact me.
IF you have to decide between apples and socks in your bra, you should probably not contact me (Unless the cause is cancer related)
IF you need a tuck it bathing suit, you should probably not contact me.
IF you have two XX chromosomes and look like a cancer patient for no reason, you should probably not contact me.
IF you have a Y Chromosome and wear makeup and are not an actor or news anchor, you should probably not contact me.
IF you are a bottom, realize you can contact me, but it will be friends only. (Same for most switches)
IF you are far away, it is pretty pointless to contact me.
I can keep going but I am getting bored and if this doesn’t get the point across I don’t’ know what will.
Oh and if you want to friend me… I am flattered… but maybe try speaking to me? I am not a check mark to tally up on your friends list, actually make a friend of me. Like a box pops up and asks you, do you know this person, are they a friend, and you click yes, and you haven’t read my profile, or spoken to me… and I am supposed to agree, and say, oh yeah, that imbecile is my buddy! Yeah, nope. I only bite if you like it… Variations on a theme:
If you want to be friends, be friendly. If you want to be friends but find the need to tell me you are willing to relocate, I will doubt your underlying motivation.
I do not live in a home with room for additional people to live. I am married to a non-US citizen and cannot sponsor anyone from out of country. I do not want to sell my home for a larger one.
I am looking for someone local for a reason. I know what I want. Don't insert yourself into this size 7 glass slipper with your size 12 situation and expect me to coo over you walking all over my clearly expressed limits and boundaries. So some people don't like someone contacting them telling them what they are into, like it's some sort of afront, like they can't have kinks, because you know, it's all about me.
But here's the kicker, it isn't all about you, it about a mtually beneficial arrangement. If one side is not having their needs and desires met, then they will lose interest.
And if someone writes to you and says hey, I like you profile, I'm into...
Maybe they're just excited, maybe your profile excited them enough to open up.
Unless the message is basically them demanding you do stuff to them without negotiation, then what's the harm really?
This is not from a place of experience, I myself do not contact people and go hey I love being humiliated do you like that?
Because it's not how I am, I'm a little less excited about this lifestyle after 30+ years in it.
But that doesn't mean I don't get excited, it just means I take my time doing it.
So don't be harsh on people if they get excited by you, to be fair it's probably a compliment.
Anyway, stay safe, have fun LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. BOYS AND GIRLS MY FET IS
DA
DA
DA
XMASSLAVE4ME
Now quick jump and follow me over there also!!! Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts
For the last two months I've been packing and unpacking everything I own. I've had a new home built and have been setting it up. Today is the first day I have had the time to set down and clear my mind. I have been reading a member's journal all day until my battery has died. I'm going to steal one of her lines and put it in my journal. I would love to find that kind of relationship where she is like butter and I am like warm toast, we melt into one. At night she backs into my arms and I hold her, tight to let her know I have her, when I roll over she instinctively snuggles up behind me like she has my back at night. This can only be achieved with totaly open and honest communication about what we both want and need from each other. TRUST. Humor is a very, very important part of our life. It's not just laughing at a joke, it's an attitude towards life. And as the world gets crazier, it's more important to laugh at it. It's a survival technigue...
I could not agree more with the words from Bob Newhart...
A bit more about Me. Super creative, strong communicator, non-judgemental and very willing to train.
Years ago I used to write erotic fiction for a website / on-going story called Lil Pony Island.. and was one of the main contributors. During that period I also used to counsel abused slaves and subs and assist them with understanding D/s versus abuse. Lots of so-called doms, really fake-doms try to use D/s as an excuse for control and abuse and the effaspects can leave long term scars on unwitting submissives. I am not an abuser, and abuse has no role in D/s. Its all about consent and for Me, working towards an identified goal. I was playing around and took the BDSM test. Here are the results, even though I don't agree with some of them.
== Results from bdsmtest.org ==
100% Rigger
100% Master/Mistress
99% Sadist
98% Voyeur
95% Dominant
90% Non-monogamist
89% Owner
75% Brat tamer
72% Degrader
68% Experimentalist
41% Exhibitionist
40% Primal (Hunter)
40% Masochist
38% Switch
29% Submissive
23% Rope bunny
20% Brat
19% Vanilla
15% Primal (Prey)
13% Daddy/Mommy
10% Pet
5% Slave
0% Boy/Girl
0% Degradee
0% Ageplayer
10/02/22
I'm deeply disappointed by those with lack of commitment or follow through. It's discouraging to say the least. Is it even worth it to try anymore? *deep sigh*
Does anyone genuinely want to serve in a live-in, domestic/household service situation? Hello masters and mistresses. I'm currently available for a short living in scene as a trial for a more perminant master/mistress. One key thing u should know is I do not flake and I am not a fake catfish. I can video chat to prove.
What I forsee In being you sub sissy slave.
First. I am more then willing to be forced to do as you please. ;). I enjoy being over powered shackled or tied. Blindfolded for more excitement and commanded or forced to do as you please. I love chastity enjoy doing house work. I ask for a form of transportation to you. And please don't fret I am 100%. I don't enjoy scams. I'm well aware of them and assure you a genuine sissy here
Please serious inquiries in available to travel upon request. Thank you for reading.
loyal @ ur service
All of these journals that are being written today..
The sound of muffled feigned pleas whisper in the air of the dark room. The only sharp sounds that radiate through the wind is the sound of the combat heels I adorn and the sound of the whip whirling so eagerly close to your skin. With each push of air towards your bare skin, the whimper of fear and pleasure ring out. Fear of the sting, pleasure from thinking you'll get your way and knowing I'll take care of you. Your wrists and knees are going tired from the face down position you're locked into, repositioning your knees causes more wrist flicks from me. Still there isn't any connections yet. Watching sweat bead down your back, my hand slides up the back up your ass cheek, the sweat making the slick material glove to glide so easily. The movement from your jolting was involuntary, you're spared a smacking with the paddle. You're disappointed and starting to get aggravated. Sitting in front of you, straddling the bench you're leaning over, I'm watching you closely, waiting for the whimpering we both know will be happening soon. The denial of physical touch besides once is tipping your aggravation into pure aggression for satisfaction. The cock gag in your mouth is making you drool right between my thighs, causing me to raise a curious eyebrow.
How long can you wait? My only demand is that you give me the time I deserve. Do not tell me you need me and then not communicate or text thinking I will wait for you. I do not have the time. My needs are real and you can at least treat me with the respect I am due.
If you cannot be honest and in the moment, that is ok. Find another. It is the middle of September, 2025. i find myself growing
more and more despondent about the possibility of finding
my ONE Master or being FOUND. 😥
TOO MANY of you reach out to me WITHOUT ACTUALLY
reading my profile! i am NOT interested in those out of the country
And/or YOUNGER than me. (currently 64) although, these profiles
Do Not seem to update our age every year. (NOT sure why) i also am not
looking for a male switch, sub OR couples.
Have a nice weekend and good luck in your searching. When you read my profile and then message me a decent sized message and then include at the bottom "but im against diapers" ... ??? Why did you waste both of our times by messaging me? You know I'm going yo block you, right?
To finish/summarize with that statement is clear proof *You do not understand my needs and just communicated to me that you do not care about my needs. You only expect to have your needs fulfilled- - That is not how this works, at all*
I've been debating giving up diapers and being a little.. but even if I do.. I still want to be with someone who understands and accepts me, someone I don't have to hide any part of myself from.. So stop sending me these messages. With or without diapers, I am not interested in a one-sided dynamic where my needs and my feelings aren't taken into consideration with care.
Thanks,Sassy After my first marriage to a cheater, I developed the confidence to start exploring bondage. I have a strong need for connection with a lover. Random hook-ups don't feel right to me. On the other hand, I love to flirt and have no problem meeting people anytime, anywhere. To balance this out, I experimented with chastity, both mental and physical. Around this time I made some good looking friends who got me comfortable with showing off my body for them. This was all very exciting but was not matching my desire for a relationship built on trust that includes times of intense sexual expression. I wanted to have a bondage partner that was as strong minded and aggressive as I was.With years of searching, it is dawning on me that my natural manner attracts compassionate and often sexually submissive women. My hidden desire is to be the submissive partner, however, I wanted to feel my submission during daily life rather than in the bedroom, without squashing my masculine personality. I'm searching for an unusual balance where I am appreciated for being a responsible man navigating every day life but with my happy partner having the power to flip my switch into a lusty and aggressive lover who will pin her down and take us both into sexual adventures in bondage and submission. I am now picturing a scenario in which my I commit to someone by surrendering the keys to my chastity belt. On days of her choosing, she provides me an opportunity for freedom knowing that I am quite frustrated with lust for her. This is my license to drop my normal demeanor and become a little meaner, taking what I need in the way that I want. When the time to revert to public persona returns, it is understood that she should claim the keys and remind me that I belong only to her. This is what I might term a submissive led switch, with the role-reversal determined by the woman not by playing domme but by choosing to let the dogs out! Yes, I want to have to freedom to using my ability to capture and dominate, but I don't want to have to suppress my desire to do so. If I hand you the keys, I want us to be comfortable knowing that when sex happens, it happens only because you want it to happen. You will know I am always ready when you are because you are my only release. a Master told me his views on human toilets. He told me, once any human willingly tastes someone elses waste, they cease to be human, they will always be a toilet, becoming nothing more than a living toilet, no different than a ceramic toilet.
a ceramic toilet doesnt get to choose who uses it,gender, sexuality, ethnicity doesnt matter.
a ceramic toilet doesnt make decisions.
a ceramic toilet doesnt have orgasms.
so a living toilet doesnt either, just because a toilet used to be human makes no difference.
so once i taste someone elses waste i will cease to be human, nothing more than a toilet unable to refuse anyone who wants to use my mouth as such forever. The other week, I went to a comedy show. The show was wonderful and I was quite proud of my autistic ass for making my desires manifest. But as I'm heading home, I start coming down from my exhileration from the night's performance because the joy I was feeling: I wanted to share it with someone. I turn to the empty seat beside me and see no one. I glanced at my phone and realized I had no one to call. Sure I have close friends I maybe could've called but, at the moment, I craved having a significant other to share the mirth, to retell the jokes to. Because that's what I look for in a partner: they're the first person I think of when something, good or bad, happens to me.
I miss that. Let’s speak on something most avoid.
What is the point of control, if there is no purpose behind it?
To take responsibility for someone, whether you call them a submissive, a slave, or anything else, and then leave them without direction, is not power, it’s mismanagement.
Service is meant to be useful.
Without purpose, without structure, without a defined role, that energy has nowhere to go, and over time it deteriorates, focus fades, discipline weakens, and what could have been something valuable becomes wasted potential.
So I ask,
You say you “own” them, now what?
What is their routine, what are they responsible for, what are they building under your direction, what is the outcome you’re working toward?
Because in any real system, any kingdom, any structure, everyone has a place.
A role, a function, a reason they exist within it.
Without that, you’re not leading, you’re collecting.
And that’s where most fail.
If your life cannot function without them, then who is truly in control?
If their only purpose is to sustain you financially, then what happens when they step away?
You haven’t built anything, you’ve created dependency.
And dependency is fragile.
Real power is stability, it’s structure, it’s having your world in order first, so that anything added to it strengthens it, not holds it together.
So this is the challenge,
Get clear, get structured, get intentional.
Because if you’re going to take responsibility for someone else,
You should already know what to do with it.
— Mistress Nikki Vixen Damn it. What is the magic elixir of who can Dominate me? Whether or not it's mental or sexual, it's like a freaking black hole for me! I think some of it must be a drop of humilation, control, power exchange (but it's much more then that, cause if a Dom tried that on me and it's not a good fit, I'll just laugh) as much as I resist that thought, it's apparent to me these days that some part of being out on a limb mentally, so to speak, is very exciting to me, and if done right, gets me very wet very quickly, and into a deep sexual submissive space. But really, it's not about orders, calling me certain names, it's about the mental game! But what *exactly* is that? Power, control, authority, desire, masculinity.
I would love to have a smart and savvy Dom talk to me about this!
Recently I meet a Dominant on here that, in all honesty, had me at a hot panty drop within a week! I mean, seriously, he unleashed my libido. It was HOTTTT. It was sexy! Why was he so different?
And he wasn't the first; I've met many Doms that could get me to undress with a look, I so craved their attention and needed their desire. But that was it. It was so obvious that other than sex we had virtually nothnig to talk about, no realy mutual connection of any intellect, no lead up, aftercare. So frustrating! So I fucked and masturbated like a frenetic sex doll for as long as it lasted, crying into my pillow for a Dom that would also engage me mentally on a subject other than his hard cock. I mean that's wonderful, great, but I need more. I want to travel, to deeply engage and talk, to explore the bigger life, to get out and make fantastic adventures, make a home.
Can I have both? Is it possible to find both? Can we find both?
I'm trying so hard to share and give the keys to this kitten to someone worthy! I'm tired of the dichotomy. Fuck my brain, my heart, my pussy. I know you're out there! Deal or No Deal?Deal breaker is, 'no sense of humour!'I will put up with a lot of stupid shit but thats a hard limit for me lol! This profile is written wiith some tongue in cheek humour, as we spell it in the former UK. Readers need to 'get it' and take that onboard. Put another way Good Sense Of Humour (GSOH) is required to have dealings with me. And as it says on my FL profile, "Please note: taking the piss is only enacted in the context of consensual humiliation, degradation and taking the piss play, I hope that's clear!" Now read on lol..☠️☠️☠️
== Results from bdsmtest.org == 100% Degradee 100% Boy/Girl 100% Pet 94% Ageplayer 94% Submissive 93% Switch 90% Voyeur 90% Degrader 88% Slave 88% Primal (Prey) 88% Experimentalist 79% Rope bunny 77% Owner 67% Exhibitionist 55% Dominant 54% Primal (Hunter) 51% Daddy/Mommy 42% Rigger 42% Master/Mistress 30% Masochist 28% Sadist 24% Brat tamer 20% Vanilla 16% Non-monogamist 15% Brat http://bdsmtest.org/r/r7tWks6F I figured I should come back and do a follow-up to my previous post about successes.
It was not a success. But I guess it was a learning experience.
Long distance is always an issue, but more so because it's nearly impossible to really know how honest someone is being when you can't actually see them in real time. It's easy to say this or that isn't a problem when you aren't in that situation. Its easy to say you are doing something when no one can see otherwise. And it's easy to let yourself believe someone is who they say they are when they don't actually have to prove it in real time.
No one wants to believe they are lying to themselves about who they are. I don't think this person intended to be dishonest with us, so much as they wanted to believe they were able to be that person FOR us, and thought they had done enough work to pull it off. I think that maybe they hadn't really considered everything fully, even though that was what we consistently discussed.
And I think that my rules about recreational drugs and mental health will have to be 100% held to, and not let slide on technicalities or softened just because someone talks a good game in other areas. Self-analysis and deep thinking aren't enhanced by substances intended to "take the edge off," and one's ability to face hard truths gets padded by it, so the hard truths look a lot softer and fuzzier through the smoke colored lenses.
Unfortunately, when the fuzzy wears off, and reality sets in, everything looks very different, and suddenly all the thinking is un-padded. That buffer of artificial happy is gone, the work that should have happened beforehand is still needing to be done. And now, they were here, so it had to happen in real time, not gently eased into over however long it would take to do it gracefully. All the easy vaporizes, and honesty gets REALLY FUCKING HONEST really fast without all the distance to hide behind.
And to be even more honest - although everyone wants to insist that who they are under the influence is still them, there are always significant differences. Since all we had known till then was this person under said influence, both of substance and of unrealistic expectations, in the absence of those things, it felt like we were suddenly dealing with a total stranger, with whom none of the prior negotiation applied.
There was acting out, there was sullenness, there were passive aggressive behaviors, and there were attempts at emotional manipulation. All of which I tried to defuse, discuss, and handle with the same level of communication and ethics that had come before they arrived, which unfortunately, as they were no longer really thinking or feeling the same as before, all failed to help them re-center themselves.
It in fact made it worse, because they apparently were not actually capable of what was being asked - the calm, realistic consideration of what they wanted long term, in order to re-negotiate and regain the long-term view of the previously stated goals. They could not let go of their focus on their immediate desire for a physical and emotional gratification, in order to secure the possibility of probable long-term gratifications.
In the end, what went wrong was what always goes wrong- short sighted, low level thinking, lack of actual effort and lack of serious thought. While they SAID they were doing these things, and they SAID they valued what we valued, etc, in the end, while they did more, and better than others have in the past, they didn't actually DO it so much as give better effort at faking it. him on 8/17/25 at 10:54 AM:
Would you talk to older, retired submissive, man?
him on 10/10/25 at 2:03 PM:
I would love to be captured by you, trained as a slave, and sold into the slave
market to a forceful dominant couple
Me on 10/10/25 at 2:07 PM:
Thats nice. Id love to have applicants for my submission that were actually writing ME,
the human, based on their reading my profile and writings and figuring out our potential c
ompatibilities rather than randos who copy and paste messages to every pretty picture.
him on 10/10/25 at 2:09 PM:
Im sorry maam, but that was direct nothing was copy and pasted. It was just one of my
many fantasies to give up control, but that was an actual message not copy and paste.
him on 10/11/25 at 9:01 AM:
You are very pretty and very powerful
him on 10/11/25 at 2:39 PM:
God, you are beautiful
Me on 10/11/25 at 2:40 PM:
Do I strike you as someone who is susceptible to flattery?
him on 10/11/25 at 2:44 PM:
I only know that you are very attractive to submissive men
him on 10/11/25 at 2:51 PM:
I sincerely apologize if I insulted you
him on 2/6/26 at 10:43 AM:
Would you be interested in dominating a older, white submissive, male wishing to be
trained anyway, that you wish and to be your servant to be used abused, and even
loaned out if that’s what you wish
Me on 2/6/26 at 1:28 PM:
Here's the problem. You are so focused on what you want, that you have yet to bother
to consider what *I* want. You have now written me EIGHT times, yet literally failed to
the one one single thing I asked in the first fucking line of my fucking profile, even after
I EXPLICITLY stated that's something I require. You know - the thing that tells you who I am,
beyond just the "pretty" and "beautiful" picture you seem to obsessed with. You want to be
"trained" and "dominated" but you have already shown yourself to be lazy, self-absorbed,
and utterly unsuitable for anything I might want to use you for.
Different strokes for different folks, right? i support that.
i'm not one of those types who wants to be beaten and bruised and bled and strung up... Even spanking is a hard no for me due to past issues.
However, i'd like to think, in this vast, beautiful Lifestyle we are all in, there is an Owner out there who has no interest in doing those things to his property.
i've been here awhile... and that's ok. Maybe i won't find an Owner in this lifetime... What's meant to be will be, right?
As far as pets go, i'm like one of those rescues... not a young kitten anymore, has a history, lotta scars, but love, dedication and loyalty to more than make up for all those things.
Oh- and my lack of pictures is not my choice. The site is buggered up making it pretty near impossible to upload any.
test results... I don't necessarily agree with all of these amounts though. Updated March 2022
== Results from bdsmtest.org ==100% Rigger100% Sadist100% Owner100% Master/Mistress94% Dominant93% Switch90% Non-monogamist90% Primal (Hunter)83% Pet81% Brat tamer71% Experimentalist67% Primal (Prey)63% Voyeur62% Degrader61% Rope bunny57% Submissive47% Masochist37% Brat14% Exhibitionist11% Daddy/Mommy2% Vanilla0% Boy/Girl0% Degradee0% Slave0% Ageplayer Was just going to leave My profile pic up for a day, but they shut down My profile for weeks to reapprove it, so left the pic up. just had another milestone in My life, turned 65 the end of August. A official Dirty Old Man ( DOM) now. Lol. Would love to find a younger slave girl to come move here with Me. Not many choices here where I live, though I love the wide open spaces here in Wyo.
Do like asian girls, wish I could find a sub here soon.
I am update journal because it's easier than profile I am now 52 260 lbs if put on diet ative work can lose weight have lost that 120 before but been under lot of stress ( I am stress eater) lost a lot family last 3 years and more willing to be 24/ 7 Repeat not running a way form something try to go to something that will make me full filled again to life and make me finally be who I ment to be. Now to be honest farther you are away will need help getting their I don't have vehicle in my car was in dead family name the die sudden and different person got it. I'm a reader and a writer.
It's words, typed, hand written, or whispered, that stir me.
I understand the limitations of this site, so I can forgive a typo, but if you use simple, crass, and ugly words, or cannot put a sentence together, I'm not interested.
If you say 'hello' or "hi how are you" or some variation, I'm not interested.
I delete those messages and block their senders.
I get to choose who I surrender to.
Do you ever have those moments were you're just sitting around wandering who's avaiable to be at your beck and call to just drink your piss. I'm just sitting here on my laptop like who just spends their day just sitting around waiting to get a text from me waiting to drink me to the last drop. You know sitting here in my unpretty house gear thinkin I so don't want to get up to pee. I'm warm under the heat blanket and comfortable. The person would have to live somewhat close by though, just another strike against me...lol Oh wait that person doesn't really exsist....lol I better get up... As some here know, I host a weekly Social Group in Real Time here in Dayton. I has been put on the back burner as it where, due to work and life. I have set as a monthly event.
Last week we talked of Collars and leashes. The meaning and use of them. There was some open play as well some private in the play room. Being that it is on Sudays, the turn out was a bit lower than I hoped but that only let memebers and guest be more open and realxed. As aways it was a blend of BDSM , Swingers and those with Fetish or Freak tendaces.
Next month the focuse will be on Rope Art and Bondage.
MASTER R. I find it interesting how many hetero males on here list that they are looking for a Dominant Male.
When I contact them, they always go "not looking". So don't check that as someone you are looking for on your profile. It isn't a default so you made that a choice. Be an adult and quit teasing or causing drama.
Thank you. == Results from bdsmtest.org ==
100% Submissive
94% Pet
87% Degradee
86% Rope bunny
83% Exhibitionist
81% Experimentalist
71% Slave
59% Boy/Girl
57% Voyeur
48% Vanilla
44% Brat
44% Non-monogamist
40% Ageplayer
28% Masochist
23% Primal (Prey)
18% Owner
7% Switch Update! 3/2022
*** I don't bother to respond to "Hi" "How are you" and similar one liners. I get too many to bother.
I'm currently open to and - if not actively - perhaps somewhat lazily (as in waiting for one to fall into My lap) seeking a great second male submissive. I'm open to the RIGHT person and situation. I don't check this site frequently though as I'm busy and it's frankly easier for me to wait for mail to accumulate.
I have previously been in and enjoy an mFm hinge type triad and I've had 2 live-in submissives in a relationship. One moved / things happened, what can you do?
I like to let relationships develop naturally into whatever they are meant to be, so I'm not saying I'm looking for live-in just that it once worked out well and was a dynamic that suited Me / us.
Now, WAIT WAIT WAIT - Don't start writing yet.
In the interest of full disclosure - I already have a collared boy. (Who is NOT bisexual so, there will be no forced bi in my household). He's just not going anywhere. SO! You must be poly or open to exploring poly. I am not the jealous type and I expect that to be true of you as well. If that's not going to work for you and you're looking for long term monogamy - I am NOT the Lady for you.
YOU MUST BE:
LOCAL or WILLING TO RELOCATE. Sometimes it can work if you're able to travel frequently, and air travel obviously shrinks distances, so this isn't a 'hard limit' ;)
ATTRACTIVE & FIT (as in, no stranger to the gym, you know what olympic lifting is, and maybe you even like the occasional crossfit workout. You appreciate words like 'vascularity' and 'striations' and you know how to make a mean protein shake.
Brainy AND Brawny - we can figure out the fetish connection and likes/dislikes IF we actually connect on any other level. I don't JUST want to beat the snot out of you, I want to like you, find you intriguing, engaging and attractive...and THEN beat the snot out of you. Just kidding...mostly. POLY or OPEN to the IDEA of being poly. You are a stable, rational adult who just happens to crave more than a vanilla relationship can give you...but you are capable of managing your own life and pursuits...and at the end of the day, you would love to lay all that control at the right Woman's feet. You HAVE A PICTURE. Let's be honest, this will never work without attraction, so... Just a HINT - you will do WAY better with Me if you put a little bit of effort into your reply, 'I'm interested' or similar one liners don't exactly endear you to Me. Asking if I'm interested in X when I've clearly stated in My profile that I am (or am not) - grrr. If you're far away you'd better be telling me about your family who lives nearby, plans and ability to visit, or remote work capability - otherwise WHY are you writing from WAY OVER THERE?
Tell Me what you're ultimately looking for or have failed to find and what you think you can offer in a relationship to a Woman (that is NOT code for money, you cynic) - what do you see your ideal situation and future looking like - what would make you so content - so happy? What future seems out of reach now but would be just what you would be afraid to hope for if you could have it? Have you ever connected with a Dominant Woman via Kink AND outside that arena? Update January 2024Since I have been contacted from several subs or wannabe slaves, I like to clarify few things:A) I am not available for online domination, period. I want to feel the smell of flash and the noise of breathing...B) I do not intend to become your Daddy or mentor. Period.C) Yes, I am available to consider LTR with the right person. Who knows...maybe you are in somewhere out thereD) Yes, I am bisexual/pansexual or whatever you want to call somebody who simply has no problem with his open sexuality. E) I disregard one line messages suche as "Hello Sir"Be curious, be open minded, respectful of others and...enjoy life! I said it and say it again, one must love these str8 males. I say that because there's one moment when finally a str8 male surrenders to a better male and offers his most intimate possession, his hole. It takes considerable time to enter such a space (you want him to come for more) but there is magic in that first entry. The man is nervous for several reasons: first time being entered, societal prohinotions, the realization that even if he doesn't do it again he allowed another male to deflowering him. Most times they reach for their penis as if to make sure it is still there. He is bewildered and with good reason, a new reality is dawning and there is no turning back. the most important moment is not the deflowering that is for me to enjoy and savor; tight, warm, and spasming. Pain, and pleasure begin a dance that takes over the whole body. I you know how to use your rod you will be assaulting the prostate and a new level is reached. All this is your reward as a bull, you worked for that but the str8 male is still hanging to whatever small idea of being str8 he possess. The reckoning comes when you let him turn, place on all four and you enter. He cannot see you, hewants to be a witness to his new reality but the only thing he can do is to grab his dick again. However, once you break in he will stret his arms and back, he has being invaded. That is still the str8 male attempting to show power and control. He wants to communicate the fact that he is still the stallion he thought he was. Yet if you know what you are doing and the assault continues on once he realizes his new role he collapses his body and embraces the bed in which his Top masculinity is destroyed. That collapse is key, his upper body flat on the bed, arms stretched, head on the side and yes closed with an open mouth uttering a silent moan. That is the moment you have conquered him, he is yours and you are his man. Updating your age on here will not put your profile in the queue to be reapproved so long as that's the ONLY thing you're updating. Profile about me's being updated and or photos being uploaded, will.
Putting this out there because I see a lot of people saying they don't update their ages due to being put in profile limbo mode, and it's simply not true. I've updated my age here for awhile now, every year on my birthday, and it has never caused my profile to go back into the pending approval queue. I am presently not owned. I have had interesting experiences in the past few years, and I am taking my time looking for the special person(s) whom I fit very well with. My interests have changed since I’ve written my profile, and my interests have grown.
I am looking for people who enjoy corruption sexually.
Those who love engaging in humiliation and degradation.
Individuals who are looking for “untraditional” service submission. I may not be able to remember to check if you need drinks regularly or breakfast, but I bring other skills and talents to the table. My skills include butler service, administrative assistant, massage, cooking, and baking.
Those who love non-monogamy and loaning out submissives.
Out-of-the-box creative sadists.
Please note that I want things to progress and meet up with individuals. The long-term goal should be to have an actual relationship. Things work out best with well-humored individuals who appreciate sarcasm and are skilled at being relatively evil, petting my hair and saying I’m such a good girl while pressing pressure points, bringing me to the floor. Unless you are local to London or travel to London (at your own expense) please do not contact me.
I do not have time to play fantasy with you through my laptop.
I am NOT going to over use adjectives to describe a setting that does not exist.
We can NOT eat a meal virtually throuh this message service.
We can NOT enjoy your grasp of my breasts through this message service.
We can NOT hear me squeel due to satisfaction on this messaging service.
We can NOT touch our skin on this message service.
We can NOT enjoy a glass of wine on this messaging service.
I can NOT use my silk on you on this messaing service.
I can NOT call you late on Friday night demanding you make a trip to my place for sexual attention on this messaging service.
So politely unless you can ring my door bell, turn up with some flowers and lubricant and a decent bottle of red wine, politely will you F-off and go submit your horny essay to some shit literature competition that equally does NOT exist.
Thank you Ive been getting a lot of slack about what I'm actively seeking and what I've listed in my hard limits. Let me do the critical thinking for you.
Actively seeking mentions couples, play partner, and friends.
A play partner isn't a relationship.
Playing with couples isn't a relationship: ergo, isn't a form of poly-whateverthefuck.
Couples can also be friends.
-your friendly neighborhood naughty girl
I am searching for a live in sub or slave. Not that I think I will find one but I have come up empty handed many times. I will even take newbies every one starts somewhere I have over 40 yrs experience. As I see it newbies do not carry emotional baggage from a previous dominant. But I am open to any level of experience you may have. Why not take a chance to change for the better.
I have been asked in the past where will they sleep, in my room of course it is quite large there plenty of room. I have been asked if they would be kept naked and the answer is No. You will be naked during trainings, other wise you will be clothed.
Do not give me laundry list of what you want I am not interested.
I am a 69 yr bbw dominant female who will not put up with any thing but I want. If you can not handle that keep on stepping. I am not your girl friend, your sugar momma, or your mommy so wake up pull your head out of your ass and either email me or not but do not waste my time. If you think I sound like I know what I want you might have chance.
Oh, there are no visits to see if it is what you want that will not fly with me.
If I am emailed and I give you a time and date to meet and tell you where you best not leave me waiting on a no show. No shows get a block real quick. Be honest and truthful other wise dont bother.
I am well aware of the nature of this site. A place where individuals indulge in their wildest desires and fetishes. However, I cannot help but ponder on the intricacies of my own desires.
I do not find superficial compliments or shallow attempts at flattery to be of any interest to me. I am not impressed by those who claim to have read my profile, only to immediately express their desire to engage in carnal acts with me. It is possible that I have come to the wrong place to satisfy my true desires.
What truly ignites my passions is the ability to engage in a meaningful conversation with someone. Discussions that range from the trivial to the serious, the playful to the flirtatious, and even the melancholy. The back and forth banter that flows effortlessly, covering a wide range of topics, from our personal relationships to the state of the world. And, of course, the subtle glances and touches that make us lose all coherent thought.
Is such a connection still possible in this digital age? I often find myself questioning if I am living in a fantasy world. But, then again, the mere thought of it ignites a fire within me. Perhaps, someday, I will find it once more. you joined up because you want someone, to want you, to use you, to abuse you.
Then in your profile you set all sorts of conditions, must have this, must do that, you set limits that keep you from finding what you began as looking for.
How's that working out for you, youre here day after day waiting for prince charming, for the " perfect" one, while missing out on weeks or months or even years of fun you could have had fun with somebody a little less than perfect.Are you perfect? Why do you expect him or her to be?
So here I am, into my 60s. I've been coming to this website for about 10 years and I don't know why but I keep coming back. I stayed away for a while and then recently decided to update some fotos. And lately I've been getting attention from straight men who are interested in having a fag/sub/slave to use for their pleasure.
It's great. I'm 100% gay and have been since I can remember. And I love almost all aspaspects of dominance and submission, but I have always been attracted to dominant heterosexual men who enjoy using a good, reliable cocksucker. I've had ongoing cocksucker relationships with several along the way and it's always been gratifying for me, and I hope for them.
One man required me to keep my mouth on his cock for our entire meeting. He'd watch straight porn in a big easy chair while I sucked him. If he spoke I had to answer him with a mouth full of his cock. He'd let me relax my jaws every once in a while, and then back on I'd go.
There was another who liked to secure my hands behind my back while I sucked. Another who would stop by after drinking a Big Gulp so he could empty his bladder in me. Those were just the most memorable.
I was just there to be a sexual servant, to be used for someone's pleasure. And that's where I get my pleasure. From making men feel taken care of and satisfied. And if a straight man wants me to suck his dick, it's an honor I don't take lightly.
Effective and Transparent Communication
In a Poly house, it is crucial to maintain honesty and open communication with the Master and all other members. This practice is not only ethical but also necessary for the smooth functioning of the household. Honesty is the foundation of trust and mutual understanding in any relationship, and in a Poly house, there are more people involved, making it even more vital to be forthright.
Being open and honest sets the tone for the type of relationship you want to have with the Master. It shows that you are invested in the relationship and committed to making it work. By being transparent, the Master gains a better understanding of your needs, expectations, and boundaries. This understanding forms the basis of a deeper and more meaningful relationship.
Creating an environment where everyone can communicate freely without fear of judgment or retribution is crucial. It allows for a more collaborative and inclusive approach to decision-making within the house, fostering a culture of trust and mutual support. While the Master has the final say, it is crucial to hear the thoughts of all members.
Before joining a Poly house, asking questions is essential to understanding the dynamics and ensuring it is the right fit. It is a significant commitment that requires trust and openness, and clarifying expectations and responsibilities minimizes misunderstandings and conflicts.
In conclusion, effective and transparent communication is essential to creating a healthy and stable relationship in a Poly house. It builds trust, fosters collaboration, and creates a culture of mutual support. Honesty and communication should be embraced by all members of a Poly house. Many folks talk about the importance of watching for red flags when searching for a Domme. In truth there are red flags a Domme must watch out for when interacting with a sub. See some below:
-Claims they have no limits
-Pressures the Dominant into playing in ways that violate their personal limits.
-Shows no care or concern for the dominants wants/needs
-Insists on playing with no safe word
-Only talking to the Dominant when they are horny
-Making threats of doing something drastic if the Dominant leaves or does not talk to them
-Calling the dominant names or honorifics without their consent
-Insists on playing with you when they barely know anything about you
-Demanding money or gifts.
If you think of other red flags to add, please let me know.
So 2025 has been 1 shit year for me. Lots of personal problems, a constant tidal wave of shit. No chance to relax.
Went to sleep early on NYE.
The big reset.
2026 is full of possibilities, never ending happiness and success.
Stay tuned. Slavery Truth
Many ask if slaves truly exist. In the way a dictionary and history define slavery, no they do not exist in most modern countries. (Though there is some contention that slavery rings do still exist in secret) Most people in civilized countries generally agree that the legal ownership of another human being is immoral and thus make it illegal. However, in the world of BDSM, one will find that some of the people involved call themselves by many different terms; one of these is the term "slave". Of course, this often raises the question of how is a slave different from a submissive. This question often is met with outright hostility, disbelief in the existence of slaves and the thought that the words slave and submissive (as nouns) are interchangeable terms within the context of BDSM. Many will not agree with any of those thoughts, and I am one of them. I have spent a great deal of time talking with slaves in the honest attempt to better understand them, their lifestyle choices, and judge for myself whether or not this is a healthy variation to the BDSM lifestyle.
To the question of whether or not slaves exist inside of BDSM I say that yes they do. They may not be the largest group, but there are quite a few. Do slaves differ from submissives? Again, my answer is yes they do. Slaves tend to differ from submissives by the way they think, act, submit and their expectations.
A slave tends to think more along the lines of black and white. They have very little room for leeway or shades of gray in their lifestyle choices. They do not seem to expect much leeway in the reaction of their dominant either. By this I mean, if a slave is feeling ill and thus doesn't complete all their usual daily tasks, they will expect the dominant to react with the usual punishment. A submissive may be more inclined to expect leniency from the dominant because they were ill. A slave thinks in terms of being owned, not in terms of submitting. To them, being in a collared relationship means they are owned, and often this translates into the statement that they do not have the "right" "choice" or "option" to walk out if the relationship goes bad. This does not mean a slave will accept an abusive relationship, though their tolerance limits for what is abusive and what is not seem to be higher than those of a submissive. This belief in ownership stems from a strong commitment on both an emotional and mental level to the dominant. There is a level of acceptance of the dominant's behavior that can be more intense and widespread than many submissives would allow. For example, a dominant wants to bring in a third to the relationship. A submissive may demand certain criteria be met before they allow ( yes, allow) such to occur, whereas a slave may say "It is not up to me, if this is what Master wants, so be it" and quietly accept this new change. To some this kind of thought process is considered wrong or somehow brought out by abuse, but this is not necessarily true. A slave thrives on the absolute fact, that they literally have no control over the relationship or what will occur within it, whereas a submissive often retains some level of control in the relationship. The thought process focuses solely on what would make the master/mistress happiest and how the slave can be most pleasing to them. Subs tend to think of themselves and their own pleasure in addition to that of their dominant. Slaves work very hard to put themselves second in all the things and their owners first. To them, this is what comes with being a slave and submitting completely. Slaves put forth a lot of effort in achieving an inner peace with their chosen position. With this peace comes acceptance of themselves, and a quiet sense of contentment. They view pride, arrogance and other such emotions as negative and unbecoming in a slave.
A slave's behavior is different from a submissive as well. If you listen to slaves talk about their behavior (or watch them), they often speak of being quietly accepting, in control of themselves at all times, formal, and other such things. There seems to be more focus on how the slave behaves at any given moment, with less leeway. In many slave relationships, the slave is required to use an honorific at all times, and couldn't conceive of calling their master/mistress by any other name. Most slaves find yelling, tantrums, fits, or any other out of control behavior on the part of a slave to be reprehensible and deserving of severe punishment. Slaves put a lot of emphasis on their behavior and how they react to their dominant. They hold themselves to a high level of self-control. They require of themselves to have a pleasing demeanor as much as possible. They see no room for bratting behavior, any form of topping from the bottom, or any other form of manipulating the dominant. They see bratting as topping from the bottom, whining, cajoling or making requests after the initial denial as manipulative behavior that focuses on the slave's needs/desires instead of the dominant's and thus not proper. They look down on any behavior that is perceived as designed to force the dominant to meet a need of the slave, rather than the slave focusing on the dom's needs. A slave will strive for perfection within themselves in completing all the tasks their master/mistress gives to them, while still keeping an eye out for things that they were not specifically told to do, but think would please their owner if they did them. A slave is required to be very self sufficient and capable because they often have a lot of responsibility placed on them. Slaves often feel that a slave should not need to be micro managed by their dominant because this is not pleasing, unless of course the dominant likes to micro manage. A slave will behave with the utmost of respect in a formal situation, and with as much respect as any situation warrants. (For example, quiet time at home may not require as strict a protocol as a formal party would) None of this emphasis on behavior means that a slave can't or does not crack jokes, goof off, or engage in verbal banter. Many slaves do indeed do these things. They do so however, with a great attention to the dominant's reaction and are careful not to be hurtful or overly sarcastic. Unless of course the dominant does not like this kind of behavior, then a slave will do their best to curtail it. (Which can be quite difficult, and in my opinion unhealthy, for someone who has a very playful sense of humor as an inherent part of their personality) So please do not take this article to say that slaves are not playful, have no sense of humor or anything like that because it just is not true. Slaves have the same array of personalities that everyone else does, and they enjoy them just like anyone else does. Slaves just tend to be a lot more aware of the dominant's limits to such activities than some submissives are. They also do not use their playful senses of humor (if they have one) to br This might describe me better. From a good friend Who knows me well.
Cuck slave seeks his place at the feet of his rightful Owner and Cuckoldress. What I lack in endowment, I make up for with consistency, wit and intellect.
I know who wears the pants (and panties) in the relationship, and I accept and embrace it.
Still learning my way as a cuck. But am enjoying the journey and eager to learn more. Willing to be used as you see fit. I am and Adult Baby, that means diapers and the other fun stuff, and I am also a Sissy. That means I like being taken care of but I also like to pamper. I take away a great deal of pleaser from pleasing others, so naturaly I am a submissive *giggles*. I also enjoy aspects of BDSM and humiliation. I love to give over controll to some one I can trust. I am open minded with in reason, and I tend to understand new things so long as they are explained in a reasonable mannor. OK, so here's the second installment of my new profile:
Still here? Still interested? Now on to the kink stuff...## ***Kink information***### **Things that i know about myself that i want more of in my life****my rubber self**I enjoy wearing layers of loose fitting full enclosure rubber, with a hood, gloves, gasmask, and socks. If you are dressed in any amount of rubber, that would be great. I'm happy to be with people wearing all kinds of clothing and gear, or nothing at all. I will be in full enclosure rubber myself.**My submissive self:**i am looking to become a rubber gimp or drone slave, i.e. used like a slave and stored like a gimp. i want to try out & test myself & to see if i do want to be a gimp slave in reality as compared to fantasy. i have lots of solo experience, but very little in-person real-life experience, so a lot of what i want to do is not informed my real-world experience.As your rubber gimp slave i want to to provide protected and safe sexual service to my dominant person while in layers of full enclosure rubber, gagged, blindfolded, leashed, cuffed, plugged and entubed & also some or all of the following: bondage, behaviour control, breath control, piss play, cart & dressage pony play, being controlled, financial domination & doing housework.my attitude is that bondage is about training and getting used to wearing rubber gear on a longterm basis, and so i am seeking to serve you by being forced into and kept in rubber gear, and learning to safely overcome the challenges that come with that. However more importantly, the full rubber gear is a means to an end where i can much better service You.i want to make Your life easier. i will pull my own weight by working in Your home or outside it while in rubber to earn income for the household. i am not no-limits rubber slave.---**As an equal:** I am into long sessions of mutual cuddling, kissing, body stroking in layers of heavy rubber. I am really interested to try living as rubber drones in a hive with contracts and rules that govern the behaviour of the hive and its members, such as these concepts and contracts by [Unit03](https://fetlife.com/users/8849164): - [The concept of a rubber hive: an introduction](https://fetlife.com/users/8849164/posts/6373426)- [Rubber Hive Contracts (or other kink between equals)](https://fetlife.com/users/8849164/posts/6412980)- [Model Short-Term Hive Contract](https://fetlife.com/users/8849164/posts/6413413)## **Limits**Explicit and enthusiastic consent is the sexiest thing. Don't fucking touch me without asking, even (especially!) if I'm in full rubber, naked or wearing something skimpy. Ask nicely and you might be surprised.My limits:- no blood- no needles- no intentionally broken skin- no scat- no vomit- no tickling- no rimming (giving)- no marks visible to the vanilla world- no permanent marks- no blows to the head- no sudden neck/head movements- no sudden loud noises- no oral, vaginal or anal sex without a condom.## **Safer sex**Asking for (or assuming!) unprotected sex when we are new or casual play partners is a red flag.### **Things that i don't know about myself, and i want to explore to see if i want more in my life**i knew from an early age that i was into rubber. However, there are some bdsm activities that aren't easily compatible with rubber, and so i have never explored them. In 2023, i am realising that i want to try these to see if i also like them, and that if i want to try them, that i have to take off my rubber skin (which is a bit scary). This is what i'd like to try:- sensation play- impact play (whips, floggers, paddles, spanking)- rope bondage- wax play- high protocol- oral and vaginal sex with people of all genders A dominant of the older schools now living in central Florida. I accept only true submission and treasure the gift of that submission. I was schooled by older masters and participated at table in the great gatherings of the northeast. I now seek a full time live slave or submissive. If you are a true submissive and desire to extend your horizons in the lifestyle. Msg me and we can discuss our compatibility. i tried to make a post about lilith earlier like i did on reddit but this site ho'd me and didn't post it after posting it was already posted. oh well. trust me if you go on reddit or otherwise it's there.
I think I've mentioned it before on here that I am above average with astrology, but I'm not an astrologer. I've never been trained on how to actually read the charts, how to make the charts. I've never taken any classes on it. What I've learned is simply through grit and connecting with other novices and pulling together information. and just amalgamating slash being alchemical And bare bonesing it, you know, like raw dogging it. But as I've shared on my previous points. my intuition is like Doja cats lyrics. Trust me, I got magical foresight. so I might not have all the understanding in three D of the words, the vernacular, the structure, the format, the step by step to do things. especially with people that are more versed in these esoteric and magic school and mystery school or any of these long standing principles and all the stuff in the mystic spiritual magic world, right?
It's like the vibe of not being a pedigree, but being a scrappy, rough misfit. LOL.
So I know more than the average person about astrology, but in the world of astrologers, I know nothing.
I've been riding extremely about this balance and holding the line when it comes to how the. Michael male divine energy engages with the feminine. Sophia Divine feminine original source energy. And because in this life I'm alternative, I'm kinky. I'm. BDSM y. I'm polyamory. in a world where I was meant to be in the sauce and I was meant to be. physically engaging with people in a romantic sexual. real life kind of realm. categorizing myself in my past experiences. But before I came to realize I'm supposed to be more of a teacher and I'm not supposed to really hold that. because when you start holding that, you lose the higher perspective. You lose like the higher realm of it. right? but before I figured that out and I was trying to get lost in the sauce, I've always. expressed relating to the opposite sex in a very Non mainstream way. So it's like, as I continue to write the way that my divine feminine resonates on Earth is with the other alternative girls. I'm connected to the divine feminine with the dark goddess energy, with the bad babe energy. with the girlies who are with the mafia vibe, who are with the gangsters who are with the dominance, who are with the. people running the emotional, physical, mental, sexual. edge.
Just like cyberpunk. 2077. I'm with the edge runners. Not all women are like that. Most women aren't like that. Not all men are like that. A lot of men aren't like that. And in the spiritual world, I have found most of them are very love and light and asexual to begin with. So it's like the way. I'm channeling this message is for a very unique small subset of people. But even in the confusion and stuff, I know what I'm seeing. I know what I'm I'm supposed to write about. I know I'm supposed to say I know the message that I'm spreading even. if I don't necessarily know who I'm supposed to spread it to. I know I got the goods. Deep down. and even if these goods never turn into anything but these notes like I know that there's something magic going on. Hashtag being a projector, hashtag being a instinctual spleen at projector hashtag having the juxtaposition cross of assimilation bringing in crazy ass concepts that are forward thinking. so ka. so desu ne.
Unrelated side note. Because I am an anime snob I do not like the digital animation and the styling. Of the I watched this show because I am deeply into the fandom. I literally not being facetious, but probably two years straight watching over 15 people play the game as much as. much as they completed it and I have never seen anyone complete the game. I saw one person on You Tube from Australia that was a lady get very close to completing the game but then felt pressured to do phantom liberty without finding all the side missions and side things and stopped to go to Phantom Liberty to appease her. fandom. but yes, I went very deep into this whole lore of cyberpunk. and so I felt I needed to watch this show in order to honor the essence of it and the message that this amazing franchise had and I Like I do most modern anime was slightly disappointed. Didn't feel much from it. Got a little bit from it, but a lot of people love how that style of medium of art is nowadays. And I'm on purpose, not on the same. not on the same vibe. I went to a club that was anime based. And I came across a younger guy. that was still an adult, obviously. But he said, I'm stuck in the past and I said yes on purpose. and he was like the 90s and I was like actually to be specific. I'm stuck in the 1970s to 2005 talking about bigger concepts like Leji matsumoso Galaxy Express 999. space operas. Tenchi muyo slayers. ah megumi sama sailor moon, serial experiments lain, neon genisis evangelion, even lighter stuff like mermaid melody pichi pichi, metropolsis the ova. When I look at something, I'm looking to learn to expand my soul, grow, get the channeled message. I'm not here for shits and giggles and fun. 99% of the time when I'm consuming, it's like I'm doing this as an unpaid job, like as a message. So this stuff nowadays that I've been introduced to does not have a message. So I do not relate to it. I'm a bad girly with a mission. And I'm very serious about it. And because I'm human, I might go astray. I might slip. I might fall, but I'm always straight back to the motherfucking mission in the day.
I'm always going to be talking about relationships and sexuality and spirituality and all that, because I've literally my entire adult life, have been wired that way. And I was. probably starting to get trained to do that when I was a minor in. probably more appropriate manners. and spirit. But I just been feeling like this message of unity on your sovereign path and not getting lost in the entanglement and the ties....passion....of sexuality and fleetingness of of. obsession and fixation and getting off track because of the pool of what the opposite person might do. And St true to you and like holding into that and seeing how so many women, especially because when you're on the edge, you're dealing with More intense chemicals in your body. You're dealing with more power play. You're dealing with it on a higher level than the average person. It's like I I've just been like talking about getting in the sauce and how it it leads to at least on the woman's side cause I'm a woman, then being down bad and their lives literally ruined like either physically, mentally, emotionally. Unfortunately, sometimes sexually, like that's the the gamble playing on the edge that when you fall, you fall harder than someone that's just totting the line. But because the dark goddesses are out there seeking truth on deeper depth and dark corners, they're willing to take that risk. I'm assuming, you know, you guys, I guess I'll call you dark gods. I have an awareness, but again, I just don't have a penis. I don't have that energetic masculine quality. I'm more of a panther. You guys are more like lions. Like III see it, but I just really can't tap into it. I can only observe. So I'm guessing same thing for y'all, but I can't say it from the core of my soul because that's just not what I was meant to do this time around. And a parmy hates to say stuff that isn't 100 percent confirmed. LOL. To the best of my confirmation at least, or to the best of my sourcing.
All this to say, my astrology hasn't gone to the level of looking at the transits or the. conjunctions. I know what they are. I can read when I see it on a chart, but it's not something I know how to make my own. It's Well, another update due!
My gf and I have a very fun lesbian to play with. Very into the humiliation aspect of having to serve a bloke too, so that's fun lol.
Now just looking for the rarest slave type. The prisoner type, sometimes join the rest of us when able, but lives to serve me mostly, while they are away. They have lives, interests, hobbies etc but you don't. Your entire existence is obeying and serving, kept locked/chained away when not in use etc. exact details and any limits discussable, but as close as possible to that. 6 Minths Post
6 months post break up.
Post world upside down
post everything.
The what if is strong for some reason
If I'd come home early and just started packing, said i know you've been cheating, I'm done.
If I'd stopped fighting sooner.
If If If
All of them don't matter, it's done now.
I am sorry I put you to the side
I'm sorry your drinking got so badI'm sorry we lost us.I'm sorry I wasn't enough. I didn't know there was such a thing as a praise kink until maybe a year ago. I just knew that there are certain words and phrases that I want to hear more than just about anything. I wasn't hearing about it or seeing it anywhere. I felt it. What I see all the time are words like slut, whore, and bitch. Very much a your kink is not my kink and that's okay situation. If I'm honest, it repulses me to be called a whore in any capacity. A good little whore? No, thank you. But that's all I would see, besides the occasional good girl. Granted, I'm no Magellan, but I read. That simple good girl has been the carrot dangling for so damn long.
There's a very specific empty spot in my brain reserved for something wonderful that opens with good girl. I didn't even know there was more. I'd walk through fire for that. You are a set apart,State of the art,Work of art.That is written into my birth chart,To be your sexpot.To bask in your sunspotAnd become empty like a brain fart.To exist as your pleasurebot;Drive your applecartInto my fertile seedplot.Every single body partIs tailored to be your playspot.I yearn for your cum shotInto my honey pot,And for the squeeze of a slipknotThat will sting like Cupid's dartAnd for the most important partTo be unto you a decadent slave heart.
~dirtydarling Drax & Scott Max - The Sun
Moments... (I) Count each moment Believing you'll set me free Wanting... Draws you closer I taste you on the air I breathe Touch me Feel me Come and feel the love this time that's in my heart and set me free Touch me Feel me Save me from this emptiness inside Here comes the sun Here comes the feeling Here comes the moment that we've waited for so long... Smart, successful, strong and structured. I wasn't born this way, these attributes were my choice. As such I don't overlook or yield these principles to anyone. If these are not qualities that you admire in grown men please move on.
I'm straight forward and I expect the same. If picture swaps, video calls, or personal meetings are a hard line for you then I am not the one. If you get together with me you will be giving up the PT&A. If that's not an issue keep going. I may be good conversation and a well of knowledge, but I am here to find another partner, not a chill buddy. I work hard and need an outlet. I don't intend for you or this site to consume me or my time. This simply means that I may not be on as often as someone with a lot of extra time on his hands. I have many differing likes, yearnings, ambitions, and needs to be satisfied. I'm interested in hearing your's.
J² I first read something last night that I've wanted to find a way to express for years. I'm decent with words so this was a gem for me to find.
So many dominants think they are dominant when really they are service tops. They mislabeled themselves.
What I get pleasure from and get off on doesn't work IF your primary motivation is to please me or you do what I want you to do.
"I get off on you getting off" does NOT get me off. At the end of 24 - 2025 .. I’ve stepped away from this platform before and return with intention—not curiosity, not games. I’m interested in real-world compatibility, emotional maturity, and mutual respect, not fantasy hopping. I seek a man who understands this lifestyle, is committed to it, and can actively participate in a stable vanilla-blend partnership.
I deserve better than I have been receiving from people online . .crumbs . .being ignored . . .thought of maybe once a week interested eh maybe? remember once in a while when desperate needing something maybe interested? use me . . .no, no, just absolutely NO! I deserve very interested! I am the dream, the love, the Queen the one to love and fall for to spoil to think of constantly, talk to lots; I am important! I know I desesrve this and won't accept the bs I've been getting. The barely human treatment little piece of crap . . .that is NOT me and NOT what I deserve! I won't accept anything less! I have so much to give and I deserve the same treatment! I deserve AMAZING treatement! I know you're out there and coming to treat me this way . . .
A Response to a now FWB of mine back when we were chatting about what I envisioned when it meant servicing him. I mostly just think about what you've told me. You said your wife doesn't pleases and pampers you. When we meet I want to be obedient to you. I want you to feel comfortable telling me anything and me being interested in what you have to say. Not ogling you in a role play type of way but enjoying whatever my master has on his mind because he's not getting the respect or attention he should be receiving. I want to be able to ease my master's stresses. A foot massage as he watches TV. Or maybe a nice full body rub and rimming my master's asshole because it's an honor to kiss his ass. I want to worship my master's cock and balls as well as the rest of his body. Comply with every order he has and do whatever he wants. I want him to be free with letting go and know the more he gets into pleasing himself the happier I get being used to make him happy.
Here is a slightly updated profile for me, while I work on submiting the final one in for approval:
Looking for sub or slave, rope bunny degradee type girl that likes spankings, for serious long term relationship.Some of my favorite kinky things are giving spankings with my bare hand, riding crops, floggers, canes and paddles, impact play in general, along with rope and restraint play. You should probably like those things too. Some rougher things I like are heavy impact play, face fucking til they puke (but not required), face slapping, knife play, degradation giving, spitting, and peeing on you occasionally (maybe while tied to a tree).I can host and play casually / socially, but ideally I find a long term partner to live together with at some point. I can supply room and board at minimum for my sub/slave if needed, (if you're into living arrangements). Feel free to have your own life as well though.. You would be mainly in charge of some simple chores and taking care of some needs, we can both work on having a wonderful life and achieving our goals.Im a dominant Fox at heart. There will be days you have to take care of me in return. I am a very sensual and sensitive person but also a hard handed when I need to be kind of person. respect and love always. Vanilla life: I have a college degree and a place to live. I drive. I like to cook, bbq grill in the summer. I like to hike and explore new places (you should like outdoor play), ride dirt bikes, go to drive in movies and out to events sometimes and dressing up for Halloween! I like cute date things, let me take you out and show you off to the world.? I play instruments and make music as well, I also like to paint. Creativity is Key. If you are into rubber/Latex fashions thats a plus. Let me buy you outfits to wear as a reward.?thank you for reading.
So, this is working now, is it? This site is weird, but hopefully I can post somthing here without sending my profile off to limbo for another few years. Anyway, consider this an addition or replacement to what's in my profile, as appropriate:
Lockdown's given me a chance to think more about who I am and what I'm looking for and I'm interested in discovering more about Female Led Relationships (FLRs) and the women who lead them. It's the mental and psychological side of it that interests me more than the physical part of it. I want to know what it's like to give yourself to serve and follow another, and if I'm capable of that level of giving myself or devotion to another. When i read stories of submission and dominance, it's the mindset of the submissive that interests and arouses me, not the physical element. That doesn't mean I'm not interested in the physical side of submission and surrender, but it's not my primary interest.
I'm interested in finding someone to connect with for a relationship, but also friends and people who want to chat. I'm monogamous in relationships, I know people who are poly and it works for them, but I'm really not sure I could deal with the logistics of being involved with more than one person, let alone the emotional side of it.
What am I interested in most of all? Knowing things, learning new things and discovering things about the world, especially the people that fill it, and especially myself because even after all this time I still don't even come close to understanding everything that goes on in inside my mind. I definitely don't think I'll ever understand everyone else, or the world, but it's fun to try and understand as much as I can. I'd be happy getting to know someone here who makes me want to write and think more, to discuss and explore everything and anything together be it sexual or not. I don't really mind if you're next door (well, I know my neighbours, and it would be a bit of a surprise if you were) or on the other side of the world, if your interested in getting to know each other, I'm happy to fire interesting messages back and forth. the blue bird woke
from a blackened dream
as a phoenix
fire burst from its eyes
as it flew away
high into the golden skies We are unable to accomodate live in 24/7/365 situations or assist with relocation
One of us will offer to meet with you via video or in person before engaging in any kink activity.
Both Owner and slave travel fairly extensively from their respective sides of the pond so while geography is not always a challenge, some places will be easier than others. Please be ready to meet us part of the way, be realistic about your abilities and availabilities.
Currently we are looking for information about any private outdoor play space locations. The Owner is also looking experienced heavy bottoms for sharps (needles, scalpel, hooks, and more) and folks into genital torture. Goodness I blocked two guys before breakfast today.
I want a slave near me who drives so we can go enjoy munch evenings together and fetish clubs too. Cinema and meals out. Because I am a Dominant Woman that is "usual" for me. I want someone easy on the eye so no older than 40 and single.
Not too much of a list I thought. But as many women everywhere comment on here, guys are not reading profiles= I copy/paste replies to avoid the monotony.
1. First guy was living in Germany 1 hour away he said. The point is he doesn't live near me in the UK. I lead so it was no. Pushy got him blocked.
2. Guy was 65 so I declined as late nights bring.on the moans from older guys= it's late/music is so loud etc. Not my thing so MY choice is the guy is a certain age bracket. Guy us pushy gets blocked.
They need to put NOTE to self Google what Woman Led Relationship is=the Woman Leads=ME.
3. The late entry to be blocked. Another free ProDomme seeker who doesn't accept a FLR is ME the Woman leads. Period.
Accept that or get blocked. Simple.
Farewell to Autumn - Witkiewicz
He penetrated more and more violently the mouth, which now only gave way little by little to the pressure of his lips, his teeth and his tongue. It opened completely, transforming itself into a wet swamp and burning with incredible sensuality, it took gigantic dimensions, it was the only thing really existing. Hela's tongue slipped like a flame out of that slimy, mollucoid mass, touched her lips and tongue, and began to suck, irritating her mouth madly... The pleasure, which flowed through her whole body, seemed already peaking, and despite that it intensified more and more, becoming of an intolerable force, which bordered on pain. The contact of this tongue which seemed conscious of his actions, he felt it everywhere in the spine, in the kidneys, and there, where billions of beings conceived in him rushed towards life, without paying the least attention nor to his great love, neither to the meaning of his existence, nor to any metaphysics. In the darkness of the body, in the swollen glands, at the complicated crossroads of the nervous pathways, everything pressed with elementary force towards a single goal: the only reward of the duped mind was an inhuman pleasure which destroyed it, giving it loneliness. unconsciousness of the moment.
Since I seem to get the same questions over and over I will answer them here and save me and anyone asking time and effort:
Q: Would you consider a male slave?/Do you ever play with a male sub?
A: Not really. My style of BDSM is very sexual and since males doesn't attract me sexually I wouldn't enjoy a male slave. I might consider a male slave as part of a submissive couple, but then again he couldn't expect much sexual interaction between him and me.
Q: Would you consider a CD/TV/Sissy as your slave?
A: I might consider it if you are part of a couple where the other party is a sub female, or if you are very feminine, very young and very submissive.
Q: Would you train my wife if I send her to you for a limited time and send me photos and films of you training and using her?
A: Yes I would if you really send her AND if she is in on it. The problem with the couples and men asking for this is they disappear and erase their profile after 20 - 30 messages and sometimes the same number of mails. Most probably they were roleplaying and there was no wife OR she wasn't in on it and they din't dare to suggest it to her, or if they did she wouldn't play along.
Q: Would you train me on-line?/Would you claim me as your on-line slave?
A: Probably not. I used to say no way, but during the pandemic I did have a few sexual relationships with submissive girls in several countries using telephone and/or various chat apps. We shared our dirty fantasies, we shared orgasms and I had some of them do painful and perverse things on themselves on my command. Now when the pandemic seems to be over and IRL contact is possible again on-line relationships seems less attractive. I live the lifestyle IRL and even an on-line slave girl takes time and effort. It's not a definite no, but you would have to be very special and very devoted for me to consider an on-line slave. So many Doms who contact me here always seem to assume I'm full of all these unfulfilled fantasies about kink and a dom sub dynamic that are
unrealized, offering their cocks, hands, and sometimes even their minds to lead me down the path into my subconscious of dark desires.
Maybe those kind of offers entice other women on this site, ones who have had only dreams of scratching their itches, so to speak, but
hey fellas, if you have read my profile and my journals, you would know I have a great lifetime of experience for us to begin with.
That alone should elevate our initial conversations above the fray.
What I'm seeking here, what I'm seeking from you, is your extra special sauce and inner sanctum of domination, control, sensuality, experiences, etc. that all impact you and bring you to this current wonderful state of being you in all your learned kink glory.
So that we may dive together into the depth that our conjoined minds and sexuality and dominance and submission can open before us when we conspire to love and serve and liberate to build a fortress of dynamic.
So please don't ask me to tell you a dark longing I've held my tongue about, because the most sexy longing I'm desiring most is to have you
meld your mind and body and spirit into me so I can become truly yours forever.
I am having one of those days today, triggers are pushing me into grief. Things I am reading, elsewhere, and stuff on TV. When I took two grief counselling courses after my mum died, I found out about the fact that grief can pop up at any time, often a random trigger bringing it to the surface.
Well today I am feeling very sad over the passing of an ex submissive, she found me on here, and after messaging me, I wasn't here much then, on another kink site, we got together.
It was good for a long time, she had more experience, and I was a relative newbie, having only a years experience, still she consented to being mine. I learn't so much, and I will be forever grateful. After we separated, we stayed friends until I got involved with someone, who wasn't her, the friendship ended then.
I had already tried once and another time would not have worked any better, so I moved on, but I guess she didn't.
I know we would never have been friends again, but I miss her, and the idea of the universe not having her in it, that's painful. I had hoped she would meet someone better suited to her, but that didn't happen before she passed. That breaks my heart.
The reason I am writing this, is, life is short, very short. It only seems like yesterday I was 20, and now there are fewer years ahead of me, than behind, and I wish everyone happiness, and fulfilment, including me. Thing is you never know the moment or the hour, people die suddenly, she did, my dad did and, well don't waste your life, live it fiercely, honestly, with care, consideration, and love.
Tain
Currently in day 129 of its self imposed chastity sentence. This slaves last orgasm was on August 4th of this year. it has taught itself to milk itself anally while caged once every 30 days to promote a healthy prostate. its goal is to unlock two minutes before the ball drops on New Years Eve, orgasm, and lock up again. it is open to suggestions on how long it should remain in chastity next year. its also flirting with the idea of a smaller cage for 2026....
24/7 Dominant/submissive/slave Contract Part 1
24/7 Dominant/submissive/slave Contract
I, (submissive), with a free mind and open heart request of IntotheKnight that he accept the submission of my will unto him. I ask that as my Dominant, IntotheKnight takes me into his care and guidance and encourages growth together in love, trust, and mutual respect. It is my desire as a submissive to satisfy his needs and desires whenever possible, in hopes that I will be found pleasing to him. In order to do so, I offer him the use of my body, abilities, and purpose.
Further, I ask that as my Dominant, he will accept the responsibility of using my body for the fulfillment and enhancement of both of our sexual, spiritual, emotional, and intellectual needs. In order to achieve this, he has unrestricted use of my body any time, any place, and in front of anyone as he determines appropriate.
As a Dominant, IntotheKnight may bestow upon me any symbol of ownership, including a collar, as well as any other future marks or tokens he may wish to bestow upon me. Symbols of ownership are to be a visible reminder of status and will be worn with pride.
Section One: Code of Conduct
Duties of Servitude
Above all, the primary duty of this submissive is to please.Personal Duties: Attend to the physical and emotional needs of IntotheKnight, behave as his sexual plaything, offer physical comfort, act in obedience, remain honest and loyal, wait on the Dominant as desired.Household Duties: Cleaning and maintaining the home, laundry, shopping, cooking and baking, running all errands as needed. Any task assigned should be considered permanent until further notice. Tasks may be added at any time.General Behavior.
Attitude: As a submissive, I will show an attitude of respect at all times. Disrespect is a serious offense and will be punished.Respect includes: manner of speech, promptness, proper answers, obedience, and wholehearted honesty.Respect and obedience are the two most valuable ects of attitude that I will show at all times. Failure to do so will be punished. Behavior in PrivateI shall address IntotheKnight as “Sir” or “Master” at all available times. I will pay full attention to him when being spoken to.My Dominant is more important than any other activity I may be engaged in with the exclusion of immediate child care needs.I will sit, stand, walk, and lay where, when, and how he desires.Behavior in Public
I will address my Dominant by his given name or “Master” at all times when there is not enough privacy to use the aforementioned “Sir.”I will remain within eyesight of my Master unless permission is given to do otherwise. -I will be courteous and prompt at all times.I will dress as IntotheKnight desires. I will do my best to always have a put together appearance in any social setting where I represent my Master.I will not argue or complain in public.Training
Training activities will include: domestic skills training, offering of self every evening on bent knees, proper answers, orgasm control, anal training to increase my ability to offer every hole as he wishes, learning to present myself as a submissive full of poise, grace, and beauty in public and private, learning protocols and rituals throughout this contract on an as-needed basis; any other training activities as IntotheKnight deems fit.
Orgasm Control
I am to achieve orgasm only by express permission of IntotheKnight.I understand that a submissive’s orgasms are controlled for proper training and reminding me that it is with my Dominant’s good grace that sexual pleasure is brought, providing motivation, physical and sexual energy. IntotheKnight will allow me this reward when he desires.Punishment
Punishment will be given for the following offenses:
Cockiness/rudenessDisobedienceIncorrectly addressing IntotheKnightFailing to properly serveAchieving orgasm without consentAny other punishable offense as dictatedForms of Punishment
Punishments can include: spanking, nipple pinching, cropping, hair pulling, withholding of orgasm, caning, any other punishment as he sees fit.
When Peter came to visit us. Peter loooked older in real life than he did in his profile picture. He was extremely well dressed and well spoken. He seemed mild mannered and not the typical Dom my wife normally goes for. After what seemed like hours of chit chat and a few glasses of red wine he finally got on to why he was actually here. That was to inspect Katie my wife and to find out how obiediant we were.
The conversation eventually got around to Katies underclothes. He started asking her questions about her bra and knickers. What colour they were, what material they were, where she bought them, how much she pays for them, how often she wears them. The questions were relentless. Then he asks if he could see her in just her bra and panties. He looked at me "You don't mind that do you Ted"? "er No" I replied. "Ok Kate I want you to stand up and strip down to your bra and panties for me" "Good girl" he said as she stood up and started undressing. She looked lovely standing there in just her undies. "Mmm" he muttered "A matching set, just what I like to see" He looks again at me. "Your wife looks very sexy Ted, does it bother you" he asks. "Does what bother me? that she looks sexy" I ask. "No Ted, does it bother you to see your wife take her clothes off so easily for another man"? "haha Oh no" I nervously laugh trying to make light of it, "I'm used to it now" I replied. "Does she make habit of it then Ted" he asks. "Well she is an exhibitionist" I reply.
"Ok Ted for this next part I'm going to require you to leave the room " "Oh no, Im comfortable now, I wont be a problem" I assure him. "No Ted as part of your obiediance test I must insist that you leave the room, go and sit in the kitchen and have a beer" he tells me. I want to interview your lovely wife in private, be a good boy and wait in the kitchen until I call you back in and don't worry I am not going to have sex with her, I will instruct her to get fully dressed shortly, I simply want to test her obiediance and limits, yours too Ted so be a good boy and wait in the kitchen until I call you back"
"Well if you insist" I mumble as I get up to leave.
Of course I don't go to the kitchen as told. I stand outside the front room door listening to what is being said.
I hear him telling her to remove her bra. the silence tell me she is complying. "Thats it my dear, just drop it there" I hear him say. "You have beautiful breasts Katie. stand closer so I can feel them, thats it" I hear him say. He asks her if her nipples are sensitive and by the sound of her shreek I'm guessing he is squeezing her nipples while fondelling her breasts.I can just about hear a few Mmm's and Arrr's and It sounds like he is playing with her tits for some while. "There lovely" I hear him say.
"Ok Katie, now the panties, Just lower them down a little. Mmm I love a fully shaved pussy, Wow that is very smooth Kate, Did Ted shave that for you"? I hear him ask. "Yes he did" I hear her say in a soft shy voice. Did he do that for ny benefit Kate" he knew I was coming to inspect you today. "Lower your panties a little more for me. Thats hit down to your knees. Part your legs a little more, Mmm thats it. That's lovely. Mmm your so wet Kate. Do you like this"? I hear him ask her. She replies faintly "Yes Sir I do"
He tells her to let her panties drop to her ankles. "Mmm just stand there like that for me" I hear him tell her. "You are so horny" he says. "I must get a couple of pictures" it goes quite and I'm guessing he is getting his phone out and photographing her.
I have been standing outside listening and wanking myself. I didn't want to cum as I wanted to fuck her after he had gone but I couldn't help cumming at the thought of what was happening.
I heard him telling her to kneel down and unzip him. She was obviously complying. "Thats it put it in your mouth, Ohhh thats lovely" I can hear him moaning as she sucks him off. After a while I hear him telling her not to swallow. "Hold it in your mouth" he tells her. from his groans it is obvious that he has cum in her mouth."Open your mouth let me see" he tells her. "Good girl" He tells her to gargle before allowing her to swallow. He again tells her shes a good girl and she knows how to suck a cock.
"I bet you've had a lot of practice" he jokes. Just clean me up a little" Mmm thats very good" he tells her.
I hear him say "Ok my dear you can get fully dressed now
and go tell Ted I said he can come back in"
"Thank you Sir" I hear her say in that soft voice of hers. In Regards to Domestic Servitude
If you are wondering what some of the tasks will be, here is a list:
Doing the chores, cleaning, and errands to include:
Picking up packages, groceries, dry cleaning
Changing the bed sheets, maintaining and putting the laundry away
Keeping the closets organized
Watering the plants
Draw my bath and pull down the bed covers
To be a Chauffeur
Wait on and pamper me
Massages
Foot and Body Worship
Push Limits!!!
Why?
Lack of experience and imagination or just to make make a submissive do things they stated as a limit.
Fully understand pushing and developing a submissive towards the Dominants desires but those who start off by concentrating just on pushing & testing limits surely lack a true understanding of the lifestyle.
As always i welcome the views and comments of O/others.
I'll be sincerely honest and say that I fail pathetically at "sexy talk". I am on the acespectrum a bit, along with some past catholic trauma from growing up catholic, I've never really developed an ability to do sexy talk. That said, I'm developing a bit of a kink when talking to someone that I am comfortable with and they start doing sexy talk and all I can do is reply to show an acknowledgement while I sit there and take it. Those who loves doling out orgasm denial gets bonus points.
A touch
A kiss
I didn’t know such passion could exist
A faint glow
A little light
A fire is now blazing in the night
A growl
A grip
A forward thrust of the hip
A whimper
A moan
A screaming of your name
A touch
A kiss
I didn’t know such passion could exist
Yes, I have been on this site for a bit. I am looking for the slave that is best to meet My desires. I am looking for long term and live in, when it happens.
I do not expect instant match and move. I want any relocation to be permanent and good for both of Us.
I hope you have watched the show Big Bang Theory. Living with Me is similar to living with the Sheldon character. At least in the aspect of I get what I want from a slave living with Me. If that isn't you then we will not work well together.
I am open to one offs and play dates and such. So feel free to reach out for that also. I Wonder Who We Are...
I often look at myself thru the eyes of my mind. Who do I **think** I am? Who do I want to be? Who am I? What am I?
I wonder how many others take the time to self-reflect like this? I try to do this weekly.
Sometimes late at night as I bask in the quiet night’s arms I find my mind drifting to the day gone by. I replay the days events and scrutinize my actions at times.
TODAY, did I live my life to my best potential? The gift of life I was given is a treasure that we so often under value. It's easy to get caught up in the daily struggles that inflict us as we sometimes dredge thru the day thankful it's over. Guilty! After all we are all human.
In a world filled with hate, selfishness, struggles and woes sometimes its all we can do not to scream. Allow a blood curling sound to exit our lungs, travel up our throats picking up momentum as it exits our lips with a shiver echoing thru the darkness to find no respite.
A primal sound that perhaps evolved from our primal ancestors to never develop or change in the millions of years gone by.
Signaling our frustrations and every other imaginable negative energy that exists within us today. As we yearn to release it all allowing them to somehow be absorbed into the cosmos, never to return. A cry for help perhaps? Perhaps.
Perhaps it's just an evacuation of all that we resent exiting us hoping we can fill the vacancy with the positive. I like to think that's the case with me. But as I look around each day, looking for positive energy, from my fellow man I am left starving. Wanting to see more beauty I can absorb to act as my muse. Guiding me to be a better me as it motivates me to want to feed love back into the world.
But alas, it has become a daunting task. Disappointment abounds the empty caverns of my heart and mind. Have we become so shallow as a society that the only thing that now defines us is instant and momentary self gratification? Often at the expense of others. Is this what thousands of centuries of evolution has led us to? NAY I say! Not I today!
Unable to find it readily at the hand of my two legged peers I turn to nature. I find myself being blindly led to the pasture where my four legged friends reside. I hear their whinnies as they see me approaching. Running towards me anxious to see me. Besides me walks my fury four legged best friend. My canine soul mate who has dedicated his life to unselfishly and unconditionally love me. To never leave me no matter what I do or how I treat him. He is bound for life to me.
Arriving closer to the gate a thunderous echo of stampeding hooves envelopes the air. Filling my ears with its roar as it approaches closer.
Standing on the lush green carpet of grass I am surrounded by these four legged majestic creatures that so easily could do me harm. My smaller companion eyeing them carefully under his protective gaze.
Wet nuzzles against my hands searching for treats. This action is common place here. All fighting for my attention as there are so many and I am only but one. The creative one among the group, finding no need to challenge the rest for the position of my hands. He quietly walks up behind me. I am made aware of his presence among the distraction as I feel rubbing against my back. His side turned head using my back as a scratching post to satisfy his itch?
No my friends that is not the self centered case of this half ton creature. He is saying, "Daddy I am here. I missed you. Where have you been?" He is most certainly not the alpha but nor is he the omega. He falls somewhere in between the alphabetically defining realm of personality letters.
Turning to let him know I acknowledge his presence with rubs I manage just a few. The other horses quickly pushing him away to look to my moving hands for what they desire. Treats and rewards to fill their already fat full bellies. Yet he stands alone a mere stones toss away watching.
Reaching into my pockets I retrieve a handful of treats. Allowing the surrounding herd to acknowledge them with their keen sense of smell I toss them in the opposite direction of my inamorato who stands there with no desire to chase such petty treats. The rest of the herd now busy vying to retrieve the hand tossed delicacies he approaches me. I hold his head against me with love and affection. It is as much his fuel as it is my own. I turn to exit, followed at a respectable distance by my adoring and adored friend.
Holding it open signaling him the permission he seeks to exit the field and the others who physically resemble him.
As the three of us stand there, me enjoying and soaking up the moment, I can't help but observe. Acknowledging and absorbing the actions that just took place. My plotted journey observed and responded to. The actions and reactions as I entered. The easily manipulated distraction I created that all but one fell prey to.
His dedication to follow me outside his defined boundaries and the company of the others physically like him who have near matching DNA.
His choice to leave the safety of his peers signals to me that he finds safety and comfort in my company. His trust in me that I always have and always will be his caregiver, his provider, his protector fills my now empty heart.
The many journeys we have traveled together since his birth are safely tucked away in my mind. Easily retrieved to reminisce upon when needed. As I stand there admiring this majestic creature of God before me my mind retrieves from the filing cabinet labeled with his name. Quickly sorting thru day 3 of his birth begins to play.
He is laying curled upon a stack of hay within a stall of the barn. His protective mother standing guard over him. Her ears pinned back warning anyone that intends to do him harm to stay away. Her eyes soften and ears relax as she recognizes me as the source of the sound. Carefully not to startle the sleeping foal I slowly approach. His mother content with who the human visitor is allows me safe passage.
I find myself first sitting next to him admiring his beauty. Astounded by the miracle of birth that he is. His soft breathing seen in the way the straw beneath his nose moves back and forth as he inhales and exhales so gently. Leaning in closer to touch him I look at his guardian looking down at me as if silently asking for her permission to get closer. When I see no warnings of alarm in her I move my hand gently running it across his neck.
His days old fur so soft I am jealous not to have something as comforting as this to sleep upon myself. He releases a soft sigh as if finding comfort in my loving strokes.
Now realizing that the submissive love his mother has given me extends to the trust of her new born, I inch closer. Soon I find myself laying along side his tiny body. Curled up next to him I drape an arm over him. Another soft sudden exhale of breath reaches my ears. Is he communicating his pleasure in feeling my warm body against? Is he capable of such a thought process?
I lay there for what feels like hours pressed against him. Only to realize as he begins to finally stir that it’s only been 10 minutes by my watches time.
Emancipated from this world lost in head space I return the the physical by his movement.
He turns his head, in what seems to be, a search to find the source of his sighs. I softly look into his eyes hoping he can peer into my own and see the love and adoration I have for him. THAT moment etched in my mind forever more NEVER to be lost or forgotten.
Slowly he rises as if not to harm me and stands over my still prone form. I find my heart overflowing with love. If only I could find this form of love in my own breed. His mother content that no harm will befall him under my watch, complete and loyal trust bestowed upon me finds comfort in our bond to now lay down herself.
Obviously exhausted by the ritual of birth and having to provide protection to her child. Her 1400 lb mass taking up much of the stall but careful not to invade my space.
Suddenly I find myself lost in thought.
Who do I think I am? Who do I want to be? Who am I? What am I? To THEM.
A brushing against my calf returns me to the world of today as the drawer filled memories are closed. In the universe of my mind I lost a momentary connection to this plane of existence.
My canine comrade standing now by my side waiting for direction. He looks at me then glances to the tack room and back at me. As if he is asking me, in the best way he knows, “Are we going for a ride?” my eyes look down at him as I rub his head. “Not today good boy. Today daddy just needed affirmation to who he is. My hearts full again. Thank you.”
“Go get him and let’s go back in. Daddy has work to do.”
Doing what he’s been taught to do under my caring tutelage he bounds off to bring back my blessed 4 legged gift. A simple double click from me, seeing his adopted brother heading his way, he knows its time to go back. With the look of a bowed head he walks to me as I rub his face and ears. I whisper in his ears, “Good boy.” As if content to hear these words he heads for the gate.
Opening the gate I let him return to his pasture mates where he looks like just another horse.
“Come on dog. Daddy has to go search for someone! “ he says as he turns to go back into the house.
Because now I know who and what I am. I know what I was meant to be. What I am looking for: I would love to find an amazing submissive partner. This person should want to put in the time and effort it takes to become actual friends and form a real emotional bond. As in any solid relationship, this is not something that will happen overnight. If you lack patience or just want a quick hookup, I am not the One for you. The person in question should be local to me or able to visit on a very regular basis. What is most important to me is shared chemistry and emotional connection. I am not looking to rush into anything. Expect the process of getting to know each other and the vetting process to take TIME. Interested parties should be willing and able to communicate extensively through online methods. I prefer typed text to voice communication, but can verify that I am who I say I am if necessary. If you are someone who does not like to write words or who thinks saying 'hi' or telling me how attractive you think I am is a conversation, you won't stand a chance. My partner preference currently tends to swing towards cis women, trans women, and trans men, but I am pan and could be attracted to anyone if the right connection is there.Preferred Age Range - 30 to 50 Turn Ons & Main Interests: These are my "must have" vanilla and kink interests. While the exact dynamic of each relationship is unique to those involved in it, if any of this is a hard limit for you, we will likely not be a match. * Tease & denial * Orgasm control / orgasm denial * Massage (getting) * Cuddling & Physical Displays of Affection * Oral service * Laughter * Intelligence * Shared vanilla interests I've physically and mentally been through Hell over the past 5 or so years and need a partner who is truly service oriented, who will enjoy helping and caring for their Domme. I am completely willing to discuss this in detail with the right person. If you have fully read and understood my profile and journal, you may send me a polite message detailing why you are interested in serving me, how your vanilla and kink interests line up with my own, and a bit about yourself. Please also include the phrase "You remind me of the babe" so I know you actually read my complete profile. Bonus points if you know where the quote comes from. Those striking blue eyes gazed up at me, filled with worry. I had just finished an in-depth discussion about one of my business endeavors with her sister, who had offered her insights. As soon as "puppy" left the room, this one rushed in, knelt at my feet, and wrapped her arms around one of my legs. Both of these girls are my property, collared and devoted. One calls me Master, and the one looking at me with such concern calls me Daddy."Daddy," she started, her voice trembling slightly, "you always talk to puppy about work and projaspects, but never to me..."I knew what she was getting at. This wasn't about changing my behavior, but about reassuring her of her value and role."Well, sweetheart," I replied, choosing my words with care, "do you think you'd understand what I was talking about if I included you in these discussions?"She paused, then nodded slowly. "I think I would, Daddy. I mean, I'd try!"I smiled gently. "Little princess, you could try as hard as you want, but you wouldn't be fulfilled by it. You're comparing yourself to your sister, and that's not fair to either of you."Einstein had a quote that fit this situation perfectly:"Everyone is a genius, but if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will spend its whole life believing that it is stupid."She wasn't particularly intellectually inclined, and that was okay. Her role in my life wasn't about deep conversations or business strategies. She was my companion, a soft and warm presence for cuddling or holding hands. She was my background noise, chatting about coloring, makeup, and other girly topics while I listened with a smile. She was there to please me, happily using her body to relieve my stresses and desires. But business wasn't her forte, and I wasn't about to force her into something she wasn't suited for.Some might say I'm limiting her by encouraging her to stay in her lane, but let me give you another example.I'm fascinated by astronomy. The planets, stars, and moons, the chaos and order of it all. I enjoy listening to Neil deGrasse Tyson talk about gravity and watching old Carl Sagan videos. But that's where my interest ends. I wouldn't be happy trying to comprehend the deeper complexities of space. I'm content running my businesses and enjoying my harem. That's enough for me.Reassured, the little one returned to her chatter, nuzzling and kissing me softly. She didn't need to understand the intricacies of my work; she just needed to be the little girl she always wanted to be. Soft, warm, cuddly, and secure in her place.Everyone is a genius, but if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will spend its whole life believing that it is stupid. 1 year post gastric bypass
I have lost approximately 80 pounds from December 2020-May 2022. I had gastric bypass on May 2021.
What have I learned in the first year post gastric bypass:
A bite or two of something is enough for a taste but you don’t need a ton. A single bite or two of something sweet but high in calories is usually enough. I was trained as a small child that anything you take you eat. Learning to stop when full and ask for a box or throw away/give away the remainder has been a huge success.
Shopping in decreasing sizes doesn’t mean you have to purchase every size as you go down. I have gone from a 22/24 sometimes 26 down to a 12-16 depending on the store. I have gotten a lot of my clothes from friends at a clothing exchange. I have at times lost more inches than pounds so when i decide everything is too big I shop then i see a large jump from where i was to where I am. I’ve gone from an old navy xxl at my heaviest to a xl in bodycon dresses to a m in summer dresses. Which was a thrill. However, I don’t shop enough to purchase every size. In Jeans, I usually end up dropping 2 or 3 sizes when i shop since i wear them with a belt until they are insanely big.
Weighing/measuring portions isn’t a bad thing. I actually want to upgrade my food scale to a nicer one. I use this daily. When I pack lunches for work I’m still packing too much. It is a shock to bring home half of what i pack. If i take a large back of something into my desk drawer I have to take a measuring device to portion it out or portion ahead of time. If not I fall into bad habits
The scale isnt the only victory. If i lose inches and clothing fit better that is a win. Being able to take dresses from tunic tops to actually dresses with boots this winter has been fun. Regular knee-high boots not extra extended calf have been a thrill. Being able to handle heels regularly has been amazing.
Going to the gym is fun with the right classes. Spend the extra for the gym with classes you might like. My family spends 86 per month on the YMCA instead of 40 for planet fitness locally. The Y has childcare and all the classes. I go to water aerobics, pure barre and body pump. I have a ton of fun at all 3. Plus as long as I go 12 times a month I get 20 back on membership. If my husband goes 12 times we get 20 back for him as well. SO it bring the Y down close to Planet fitness in cost plus it includes childcare and activities for my daughter as well.
I can keep up with my co-workers who are almost half my age. I feel mentally sharper. I also can physically outdo some of them. I work in a department where we move some boxes of paperwork on a regular basis. As long as i’m not wearing a short skirt and the box isn’t over my head I can lift most.
I have learned it is ok to ask for help with medical concerns. I am an insulin diabetic on a pump. I have had to reach out a few times for my data to be reviewed by my diabetic care team and be adjusted.
My goals for year 2 are to:
I plan to up my time at the Y. I currently go 2 times a week for me and then 2 times a week for my kid to use the pool. I want to get to 3 or 4 times a week for me and 2 times for my kid.
Find someone to be accountable to forMonitoring the protein i get in daily- i should be getting between 60-90 grams of protein in dailyMy time spent at the gymMy food logs
With my current partners consider adding those pieces into my dynamic with them. Not so much as to be babied by them but to know i’m being monitored. To Know i will be asked why i didnt do one of them some specific day. It is like the monitoring with my medications that we do currently.
I want to get under 200 pounds. I have always been a BBW but i want to become closer to hwp. I want to be able to completely shop in straight sizes instead of still flipping between straight sizes and plus.
I want to be able to get tied into more positions. In addition to being a masochist.
Am I the only that looses things in my titties? I put something there for a minute and forget it's there. Sooo I just my panties and that time of the month pad up under my tit while I potted before I got in the shower. I usually leave on top of the toilet paper roll so it's right there when I get out of the shower. Well I forgot all about it until I was in shower getting ready to wash under my tit. Like really?lol |
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