Write_in_Red

Life in OK 3.1

write_in_red — Tue, 17 Sep 2013 03:33:31 GMT

Wow...so it's been a minute since I posted.

It's not because I had nothing to say; but more that I was SO busy I could barely breath.

I have accomplished a lot this last year.

Since the last time I have posted I have finished my second year of my Master's degree.

I have dropped a class due to low grade for the first time in my educational career.

I have held down two jobs and a full time graduate school schedule.

I traveled to Arkansas to see my ex...lol. She insisted. It wasn't a horrific venture; but despite having had been in a "I miss..." slump it just cemented that the two of us were better off as friends. It also made me thankful that she encouraged me to stay in contact with her. The two of us not talking would have made House Reunions a bit awkward...lol. You can insert whatever you think into the " ", because it probably crossed my mind at the time. Her. Him. the Future. Possibilities. Romance. Being in a Relationship. But mostly someone to play with my hair...

I have spent a great deal of time with my nephew, A; long lengths of time trying to get him to call me GiGi...lol.

I came to the decision that it was time to part ways with R. Being best friends is supposed to be a partnership; it like all other relationships takes work. After realizing that I had put myself close to $10,000 in debt supporting myself, her, and her son I knew I had to make a change. B was one of the best parts of my life; but I'm not his parent. I don't get to legally make decisions for him. Despite not spending time with R, I try and see B on holidays and special occasions. We made Christmas cookies for the 3rd Christmas in a row despite me not having had a meaningful conversation with his mother in almost 8 months.

I have managed to distance myself from R despite the pain and difficulty of separating my life from my best friend of 3 years. Also, not taking B to his First Day of School Breakfast this year about broke my heart...

I have supported my sister as she learned how to be a new mom, and a single parent every other week. I encouraged her to love her son; but to make sure she took "me time" for herself to avoid burnout since M was in the oil field so often. The favorite "me time" required frequent pedicures...lol

I have helped T work on colors for her Spring wedding! M finally proposed just after A's 1st birthday. :) I am happy to announce that T asked me to be her Maid of Honor. :)

I have survived the 5th anniversary of losing Dad with the least amount of hours of gut wrenching sorrow and tears. T kept me busy and plied with Margaritas...many many Margaritas. Regardless of the number of years he has been gone, this hurt worst than the first.

I have planned a vacation for early next summer that will reunite me with several of my Housies from my undergrad! New Orleans better watch out...lol

I have applied for a new job as a part-time assistant manager for a store in the mall. If I get this I will be able to stop the 2 jobs gig; and focus on one job and school. Crossing my fingers for this! I am so tired.

I have been out of the country again, for the first time since I came home from England.

I spent 3 weeks in South Korea with my Roommate: K the Only. I had a blast.

I have started my last semester of actual classes for my MSBS.

I have been accepted as a research assistant for a project one of my professors is running. This time next year I could be published!

Somewhere in there I discovered Pinterest, and it would have stolen my soul if I had been in possession of one...but being a ginger and all...you know. And, Sherlock and Harry Potter on Pinterest? OMG. Also, I believe that Pinterest is hugely responsible for my "I miss..." phase. It makes you want to bake, be crafty, get married, have babies, follow fashion and fandoms alike...it's madness!

This post is a quick and dirty overview of the last year of my life. Despite the length of time since my last update, I am glad to return and find LJ alive and kicking. I would often think of logging on and posting; but most often I was too tired to even lift my Ipad. How tragic is that?

But good things are on the horizon for me, I can feel it!

I hope anyone who reads this is well. Please know that even though I haven't been here I have thought of each and everyone of you more often than you probably realize.

Life in Oklahoma 2. whatever...

write_in_red — Thu, 02 Aug 2012 09:35:14 GMT

Today is August 2nd.

I think about this day all year round, but it always manages to sneak up on me somehow. I'm so aware of it, the countdown starts at months and progress to weeks; however, when the actual day is upon me it's like I purposely lose track. I guess some part of me is wishing that maybe I won't remember and I could make it through the day without feeling like there is a hole in my chest the size of a black hole. Kids are supposed to bury their parents, its the way of things; but not until they are old and grey, not until they have witnessed all those milestones in our lives. I feel so cheated, and my poor sister...She just had my nephew about six weeks ago, he has this dimple in his chin T got from Dad...the first time her boyfriend's dad held the baby I thought she was just going to break apart...I thought I was...it hurt so bad, but nothing like today does.

Tears run down my face, and my chest hurts so bad; not from the crying, but from this ache I just can't make go away. I rub at it, and it just reminds me I can't actually get to the root of the problem. I can't make it go away...

Four years ago today my mother woke me up with a soft shake on the shoulder, and I knew as soon as I saw her face that he was gone. I remember thinking that it wasn't fair, I was supposed to have months to prepare for this day. Kidney Cancer came back they said; 3 1/2 months at most I was told. I had been steeling myself for it. I was a week and a half away from boarding a plane to leave for a semester abroad when we found out he was sick again. He told me there was no way I couldn't go; told me to go see Ireland for him, look for that side of our family in every rock and glen, to achieve that dream I'd had since before I knew what a dream was.

So my bags stayed packed, and two days after his funeral I got on a plane to Ireland. At the ceremony I remember thinking maybe its better this way, and then feeling like the most horrible daughter in the world. This way I got to be at the funeral, I got to say goodbye, I was able to hold my sister as she cried, and I lied to her like everyone always does and told her it would all be ok, someday...This way my mother didn't have to call me from half way around the world to tell me that he was gone and we didn't have enough money for me to come home. This way I didn't have to dread every email from her saying she wanted me to call home to talk...

I traveled Europe, and saw so many wonderful things and in every church I went in to I lit a candle to let my dad know I was thinking of him every step of the way. I didn't make friends like everyone else that semester, I barely got to know the girls I shared a room with. I didn't sleep, I took naps when I couldn't keep my eyes open any longer; and I became so quiet. I was struggling to stay afloat and no one could see, and no one cared. It was the worst and best time of my life. I took 8 gigs of pictures in 4 months, and wished with every snap I could show him just one.

I saw a train station a couple hours north of Dublin with our last name; and just wanted cry and laugh at the same time. He would have loved that.

I started out this fucking anniversary with my sister and a movie. But she has fed the baby for the last time tonight, and ha bundled the two of them off to bed. I'm alone, and I'm listening to the same song on repeat, just crying. This ache in my chest can't last forever, it has to let up soon, right? God, I'm so glad this day only comes once year...

They kissed goodbye at the terminal gate
She said, "You're gonna be late if you don't go"
He held her tight, said, "I'll be alright
I'll call you tonight to let you know"
He bought a postcard, on the front it just said Heaven
With a picture of the ocean and the beach
And the simple words he wrote her
Said he loved her and they told her
How he'd hold her if his arms would reach

Wish you were here, wish you could see this place
Wish you were near, I wish I could touch your face
The weather's nice, it's paradise
It's summertime all year and there's some folks we know
They say, "Hello", I miss you so, wish you were here

She got a call that night but it wasn't from him
It didn't sink in right away, ma'am the plane went down
Our crews have searched the ground
No survivors found she heard him say
But somehow she got a postcard in the mail
That just said Heaven with a picture of the ocean and the beach
And the simple words he wrote her
Said he loves her and they told her
How he'd hold her if his arms would reach

Wish you were here, wish you could see this place
Wish you were near, I wish I could touch your face
The weather's nice, it's paradise
It's summertime all year and there's some folks we know
They say, "Hello" I miss you so, wish you were here

The weather's nice, in paradise
It's summertime all year and all the folks we know
They say, "Hello" I miss you so, wish you were here
Wish you were here

Wish You Were Here - Mark Wills

I'm not really sure why I keep repeating this song, it seems counterproductive to not crying; but some part of me wants to imagine that those words are close to what Daddy would say to me if he could. I may be 26 years old, an adult now; but I feel so small today and not strong at all.

I hate the 2nd of August.

Life in Ok 2.2

write_in_red — Fri, 13 Apr 2012 09:09:14 GMT

Well, its been a long time since I posted.

Finished first semester. Yay. Ethics class was good, I enjoyed it. My online class was a horrible disaster; passed, but just barely. Decided then not to take anymore online classes if at all possible. Statistics was the middle ground, I didn't try too hard, but just hard enough to get an acceptable grade.

Christmas was good. I got the most fabulous gift; a book case that looks like the red phonebooths in London. I was so excited. I also received a large cityesque type scape of London done in blacks and reds. *sigh* so wonderful. :)

After Christmas and the New Year, I got my wisdom teeth taken out. It was not pleasent; the bottom two teeth were compacted, so they had put me under to take them out. I asked for the suggested three days off; but ended up off for almost a week and a half. I had a bad reaction to the antibiotics, and ended up having to go back in because I developed scar tissue where they removed one of the teeth. My last day of my lovely leave, my store manager was let go.

So coming back from a horrible procedure I get to acclimate a new store manager who is a little uppity. He is all sorts of I am the big man around, and we will turn around this store in 3 months time. Three months time is approaching and while we have come a long way we aren't Grand Opening New. I also stepped down from the position they promoted me to. It was too much work and not enough help to do what needed to be done.

Well, part of it was because it was too much work and no help; the other reason I stepped down because Meems was in the hospital for a week. Her blood oxygen level so low when they admitted her; 76% when a normal person's is above 95%. She caught a cold, and Pops was out of town with AM; I tried to get her to take her medicine and eat, but she just wasn't getting any better. She eats like a bird on a good day, but this time I couldn't get her to even finish a couple pieces of toast. I got home from work and coached to eat as much as I could; then I made sure she had everything and left her dosing in front of the TV in her bedroom. I went quietly to my car and promptly got my mum on the phone and burst into tears. I cried because she was so sick, and because I couldn't get her to eat anything and her cough. Mum told me she would get better and to not worry. She offered to come back across town and stay with Meems; but Mum hadn't seen her boyfriend in a few days, work and what not.

The next morning I got to work and am almost getting ready to get off when T shows up in her ACUs. She was just home from Drill, and hadn't even gone home to change. They had sent her to work to come collect me; RI had informed T that I had been upset the night before and shouldn't hear about Meems being admitted to the hospital from a text or a voicemail. It was a nervewraking experience, having T say we just have to go, and then driving us in the direction of the hospital. All sorts of things were going through my mind at the time, and none of them good.

Meems was still in the ER when we made it in. They were waiting to have a room cleared on the third floor for her. The staff of the ER were very kind; they understood that we were all quite scared, usually there are only two visitors in each room. But, at one time there was 6 or 7 of us. A girl who is getting ready to marry AM's youngest works in ER and they took pity on us. Eventually we filtered out when it became apparent that she was going to be there for some time. Mum came home after they got her settled, but I couldn't just leave her there. I was so torn up about it.

I got together a change of clothes, house shoes, toiletries, and one of my purple blankets to brighten up the room. They are always so dull. I almost made it through the visit to her room without crying; but she was so tired, and they had pumped her full of medicine that made her sleepy so she didn't notice. I made it home, but was still to wound up. I watched some TV with Pops in the front room and then went to Wal-Mart to pick up somethings I just remembered Meems had asked for. While there I picked up some balloons that are still floating, albeit a little deflated in her room.

I spent the next week parked in a chair by her bed, unless I was at work or in class. I was by no means her only visitor; we all cycled through with almost clockwork like regularity. After a week in the hospital they sent her home on oxygen full time. She can't cook with the canola on, nor can she do extraneous work for any length of time. So, stepping down made logical sense; I didn't really enjoy my job and help was needed at home.

Since then, I am happy to report that her oxygen level has been moved from a 6 to a 1. And she only has to wear it when she has trouble breathing or when she is sleeping. Her breathing treatments, 4 times a day, are continued; as is all her medicines. But, she is at least home. Now, if only we can get her to stop smoking on what she thinks is the sly...Mum has found 6 packs of cigarettes in various places around the house. It's tearing her up that her mother won't quit, even when she knows she could end up back in the hospital. I am scared for myself, losing my grandmother is going to break me in so many ways. I don't want to contemplate the day I have to wake up and remember that she isn't here anymore; but I've been where my mother is right now. I remember when Mum was sick, when she called to tell me she had a tumor, the surgery and all of the radiation treatments 5 days a week for six months; and of course, let's not forget the yearly expedition to the doctor for a check up. I know how scared she is, how much pain she's in; but at least my mother didn't have a choice about ending up back in the hospital.

In all this poor Meems has been through the ringer. She was the one in the hospital and she was scared, of course. But since her release she has gone form one extreme to the other. She didn't move for days when she was first sent home; and then she discovered QVC, the home shopping network...Heaven help the living room and her credit card... But here's hoping her and Mum's last bout about smoking will have gotten through to her. If not, I am getting ready to suggest hypnosis for lack of any other options.

Also, in all of this, I forgot to mention that T is pregnant again, about 7 months now. By this point in the pregnancy we've almost released the breath we were all holding when we heard she was pregnant again. She was quite lucky in getting a doctor who specializes in high risk pregnancies to agree to take care of her; most of them won't take on a patient that has less than two or three miscarriages. Her doctor has been kind and very efficent.

But, onto the good news, I will be the proud aunt of a little boy in July. Of course, T being due in July put a kink in my original summer plans to make it back to Europe, but there's always next summer.

It's April 13, and Friday the 13th. One day before my 26th birthday. Joy of joys...sense my joy? No? Imagine that...lol. I can hardly bring myself to really admit that I will be closer to 30 than 20...lol. Oh well. RI wanted to get some of the girls together and go out and drink; but I decided I would rather have spaghetti at home and play spades in front of the TV with a Pirates movie on. :) Sounds like a great plan to me. :)

So, there we have it. Every time I would get on to read or check my email I would get as far as deleting the stuff I needed to and maybe reading a fic or two if I was lucky. But, my poor laptop has seen more dust accumlation in the last couple months than in its life...lol. I am sure that this is the first time any of my laptops have ever even seen a spec of dust...lol. :)

I'm getting ready to go to bed, loads of cleaning and paper writing to do tomorrow.

p.s. also got another tattoo, this one on my left foot. It's wonderful, and exactly what I wanted.

People's Choice Awards! VOTE!

write_in_red — Mon, 05 Dec 2011 08:16:05 GMT

Supernatural is up for two awards this year, lets make sure we have a chance at them! You can vote as many times as you like, click here. Now, a word from the men we all adore, with their own little reason for your votes... :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=baQeFS29Wqg

Enjoy the show! :)

and VOTE!

I've already voted 10 times, for both categories...I felt it was my duty! :)

Homework Woes...

write_in_red — Mon, 05 Dec 2011 01:01:38 GMT

So, I'm supposed to be working on a paper...lol. I mean, I kind of am. It's all open on my computer; but *reverts to small child* I don't wanna!

*pouts*

papers are bah! Especially boring ones...where I have to design my own experiment, carry out the experiment, explain the methodology on why I made up said experiment, and find sources to support the idea; because God was the last person to ever have an original thought...

Sorry, about that last part, but that's what they said in class! No Lie. We were told until we finish this course of work, and then our Doctorate then we are not knowledgeable about ANYTHING. Nothing. Nada...seriously, I think that's a little out of hand. lol.

Maybe I have the 'End of Semester' blues and I'm a bit ahead of myself...I mean, I did this once, I have the degree to prove it. Why did I think going back to school was a good idea? FML.

Oh well, I think I have delayed enough. I want to get the majority of this paper done before I have to go pick up RI from work, which is in T minus 3 hours...lets see what I can get done.

In Return for Fic

write_in_red — Thu, 18 Aug 2011 01:50:57 GMT

01. The first five people to comment on this post get to request that I write a short ficlet of any pairing/character of their choosing. In return, they have to post this in their journal, regardless of their ability level.

cards_slash wrote me a super adorable James/Michael ficlet. Read it! So this is me posting...Thanks again!

02. Pick on of my fics, and I'll give you three details that didn't make into the fic. Background canon, deleted scenes, or a look into the future. My choice, but if you have a specific question you can ask it in your request.

My debt is paid. :) But I would gladly do it again if it meant more J/M fic. I just can't get enough of that pairing. Yum.

Oklahoma 2.1

write_in_red — Sat, 13 Aug 2011 07:29:23 GMT

So...entry 2.1

Why? Because I have been in Oklahoma for more than a year. Can you believe that? I'm not sure that I can. It's been a roller coaster of a year, and so much drama that I'm not sure I can even wrap my head around it.

Not to mention that it has been an ungodly length of time since I posted last. Damn.

So, to catch up. I was in a car wreck in June. I was rear ended at a major intersection in my town. I was the first car in the lane, the light changed to yellow, so I stopped. Unfortunately, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention and hit me doing 40+. He pushed me almost completely through the intersection, which was actually quite lucky for me because I could have been t-boned, that would have sucked.

I have a tiny Toyota, so it completely messed up the back end of my car. It was horrible...insert bitter tears and sadness about my baby... :( I had to have several estimates, and go through all sorts of bull shit. But let's leave it at the fact that if I am never in another car wreck it will be too fng soon. Like seriously.

I could also wax poetic about the horridness of the people who had my car and their shitty repairs, but I will not depress myself or you. The bare facts are that they had my car for over a month, I was in a rental for the whole time. FML. a beast of a rental, so that is what I named it, Beast.

It was not long after my wreck that Corporate decided to pay a visit to our store, and do a random drug test. I had no reason to worry, I've never touched the stuff. I have a personal aversion to it, but you know live and let live. If your habits didn't affect your work, I didn't care. When they were done with all of our personal interviews and the results were back, they leveled our store. They fired 1/4 of our employees, a good 15 people. FML.

Among those 15 people were two department managers and three leads. FML. Made my life super difficult, and the lives of everyone in our store difficult. In those two days they fired most of my favorite people, and I got a promotion. Not sure that's how I wanted that to go. Sadly among those that were let go was the guy that I had been "talking" to. Why do we even do that? The whole "talking" thing? I mean we went to lunch a couple times, a few movies, and texted every now and then. But we weren't dating...lol. We texted back and forth for about two weeks after he was let go, but I haven't heard from him in a while, Ce la Vie.

I took a vacation to Mo to see some of the girls. It was a nice visit. I stayed with R, we went and saw Harry Potter 7 pt 2. It was a good movie, I was kinda said. My Facebook status said I was pretty sad because I had just watched the ending of an era. True words. I mean, I started reading those books when there was only one out...I had to wait for each subsequent book. That's true dedication.

The K2's drove down from their respective homes and met us in St. Louis. we ate dinner and walked a bit to the Babies R' Us, and spent time with the cute Housie babies. Next day we went to the zoo...fml. Why do we do that? I mean, it was the middle of July and 100+ outside. FNG ridiculous. However, I did get to pet a sting ray and a shark. I also got to feed the sting ray. It bit me! And it was awesome! LoL. I laugh because that was totally one of the K2's status last year. Good times, good memories.

Next day we drove up to Hannibal and had lunch with J. Ran around, looked for purses, and J gave me the most fabulous present ever! She bought a lamp post! That's right, a decorative lamp post because I was so obsessed with them while I was in England. I took a picture of each one I saw, I was soooo excited to see it. I wrapped my favorite green and sparkley scarf around it, and it could not be prettier...truly.

I came home to a disastrous department, and so much work that I'm not sure I'm ever going to get it all done. I feel stressed all the time because I know we aren't making enough progress. But it is so hard to get ahead when the few associates I get keep getting called to the front. So for hours at a time my department is left empty for people to trash and not enough of us to keep stuff caught up. FML. Why did I think running a department would be a good idea? I should rethink this whole being in charge thing...

In other news I am down to my last couple appointments at the chiropractor. That's nice. I've had to go 2 or 3 times a week since my accident and while I love my people at the office I would rather just not be in pain. My back is ok, it hurts if I carry too much or work for too long, but I'm doing good. My ankle and my shoulder are the only thiings that still bug me regularly. But who knows if my shoulder will ever be the same. FML. I would like to sleep on my left shoulder, but it still hurts a bit. grr.

On top of everything else that went on in July, I had to look forward to the beginning of August. Fml. Fng anniversaries. I was pretty sad. Dad has been gone for 3 years. It's kind of hard to believe. T spent the day in my bed. She fell asleep the night before on the couch at Meem's. When I went to work at 7 I sent her to my room. When I came home from lunch she was still buried under the covers, and when I got off work she had only moved a few inches. She finally got up to go to work, but I know how she felt. I had put a country cd in the player in the car the night before, it had the my most hated song on because it makes me cry every time. So I bawled the whole way to work and then had to be "on" for the rest of the day. The 2nd was a Tuesday, so I couldn't take off, new realses and all that rot. Oh well, we made it, sort of.

Whew...ready for some good news? I got accepted into the Behavioral Sciences Master's program at the university here! That's right, I am going to get my Master's degree. Whoo. I'm doing the psychology track, and am pretty sure I already know what I am going to do my thesis on. RI is a little leary, but I'm sure I can find and prove it. I just need to plan and start working on it now.

But what could possibly top that? I mean, it would have to be pretty awesome right? Well, it is. Do you know what awesome event T has agreed to attend with me? Can't guess, well I'll let you know...the Christian Kane concert not 45 minutes from my house. That's right! In less than 6 weeks I will be sitting less than 100 feet from him as he sings, because let's be for real, I bought platinum tickets. If I'm gonna see him, I wanna see him. LoL. Soooo excited.

In other news, I have lost the last little bit of my soul when I signed up for a Twitter...lol. I always said I wouldn't, but I couldn't help myself. I really did it for T...at least that's what we're gonna go with. lol. In all actuality I got it so I could follow Christian Kane...lol. I mean I resisted when Jared got a twitter, and it was by a small margin...because I was so close. I mean, I was an original Sam girl, so that was a real attraction for me. Oh well.

Well, I have to be at the store early in the morning. I have a local author coming in for a book signing, so I'm off to bed.

*giggles*

Christian Kane. baw ha ha...

I'm done now.

Life in Oklahoma 1.11

write_in_red — Fri, 24 Jun 2011 02:00:54 GMT

Had an estimate done on my car...$7,000 worth of damage...

FML.

Also, whirlwind trip to Missouri for Mum's yearly doctor's appointment in St. Louis. These things always tie me up in knots, and after the weekend I'm just a little grouchy. :(

I even snapped at RI before I left because of some comment she made, and I took it totally wrong. I apologized, but going back to that hospital just breaks my heart every time.

Enough depressing thoughts. I have a new book. LoL. It's a romance...pure unadulterated romance. It's called Dark Lover by J.R. Ward. I've never read anything by her, but I hear she's good. *shrugs* We'll see.

Off to take some Motrin and find my ice pack.

bah.

Life in Oklahoma 1.10

write_in_red — Tue, 21 Jun 2011 05:18:04 GMT

Ouch...

That's all I have to say.

I was rear ended yesterday on the way back to work after lunch. I am missing the back bumper on my poor baby...she looks so awful...poor car.

That's what I get for stopping at the stop light. Bah. No, I was lucky. I was the first car in the lane, and the driver behind me didn't stop or brake at all. They hit me going 40+ mph. It jolted my car into the middle of the intersection. I was extremely lucky I didn't get hit by someone going through. Thank God for the quick reflexes of the other people.

I made it through the intersection and pulled into a parking lot. The kids in the other car were ok, minor injuries from their air bags deploying. But none of us were seriously hurt. Police arrived. Police report to be had. His car towed away, and my poor baby in pieces...

I was for sure I wasn't going to be hurting at all...what a crock of shit. My shoulder is killing me. I went to the chiropractor this morning at 9. I was there till almost noon. There was an exam, and x-rays, and therapies and adjustments to be done. FML. And I am sooooo sore.

My Chiropractor said I would have to go 3x a week for 2 weeks, and then 2x a week for 3 weeks, and then so on and so forth. He was giving me an outline of how in a few weeks we would work on strength and range of motion exercises...I almost laughed...surely I won't need those.

Went to work and did stuff, anyway. I was preparing to ship a dvd to a customer when I tried to reach over my head and grab an empty dvd case...bad idea. Hurt so bad I almost cried. I also tried some homeopathic muscle relaxers...I can't feel a bit of difference...damn.

Well, I am going to try and get some sleep. I have to be at the store at 7 am...fml.

Fng Car wreck...fng shoulder...bah.

I don't make a good sick person...

Schmoop Bingo - Amnesty - Candlelight Dinner

write_in_red — Tue, 31 May 2011 13:15:27 GMT

Title: Candlelight Moment
Prompt: Candlelight Dinner
Medium: fic
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: RPS Slash
Summary: How I pictured the first Valentine's Day Dinner

So I wanted to do a picture for the last part of my bingo to go with the last fic I wrote. So, I had this loftly image in my head and what I was going to do with it...ha ha.

I bought a new computer in January, and still haven't managed to add all the programs I used to have. So the other day I downloaded GIMP so I could start messing with the pictures I had picked out. Only there had been an update since I did anything last summer...and man, is it like another world. I don't remember where anything is, or what any of the specific functions I'm looking for are named.

Then! The two pictures I wanted to piece together just wouldn't go. They didn't fit well, and I was rather depressed about it. I was thinking I just want them to look like that other picture, the one where it looks like they're staring into each others eyes. That one.

After a couple hours of disaster upon disaster I decided to not reinvent the wheel but change it to how I saw it. I hunted up the picture, thank you Jensenacklesfans.net. It is one of my favorites. ;)

My final product is here.

Here is the method to my madness about the picture:

When I think candlelight dinner, my first thought is almost always the one from Lady and the Tramp. So, that is what inspired the lens type focus on the picture.

I also searched the internet for a picture of a candle I was willing to add to the picture, but I couldn't find any...lets be for real, this picture if freaking perfect. An actual candle would pull your attention away from their faces, which is what I wanted people to focus on.

When that was decided, I wanted to go with just the glow and the lighting from a candlelight dinner. So I took a funky brush and lightened the edges to shades of white on everything but the boys. I did that in varying strokes and two different sizes, I hoped it would a few shadows here and there. Then my favorite part ever of GIMP, is the soften. I know several different image manipulation programs have similar effects, but I discovered it while fooling around in here.

I love it. It just softens the edges, makes it seem like this might just be a quick snap shot into a dream. And it also lends a softness to the already affectionate looks on their faces. :)

So that is it!

The Schmoop Bingo has been completed!

Yay!

Schmoop Bingo - Amnesty - May this Be the First of Many

write_in_red — Tue, 31 May 2011 12:58:25 GMT

Title: May this Be the First of Many
Prompt: First holiday together
Medium: fic
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: RPS Slash
Summary: The boys' first Valentine's Day.

“This is dumb,”

“Hmph,” came the response from behind the magazine.

“I’m being serious here!,” Jensen leaned up from his place sprawled across his couch. “How can you be so blasé?”

“That’s easy.” Tom peaked over the edge of the article he was reading, “I’m not dating you.”

“Indeed. I wouldn’t want to date you.”

“Hey! Don’t be an asshole because you’re stressing too much about this.”

“How can one stress too much about Valentine’s Day?” Jensen decided actually looking at Tom wasn’t any more helpful than listening to his distracted responses, so he flopped back down with a heaved sigh. “Besides, you have it easy. Your boyfriend is the one who goes all out; you just have to show up wherever his ridiculous plot takes place.”

“I know, it’s amazing.”

“I hate you.”

“No, you don’t.” Tom closes his magazine and tucks it between the cushion and the arm of the chair. He leans forward a little, just enough to catch Jensen’s peripheral, and cause him to turn his head. “The way I see it, you have two choices. You can stress over it, and work yourself into an early grave, where it won’t matter anyway,” at Jensen’s glare he finishes, “or you can decide what you want this to mean and go from there.”

Jensen looks at Tom like he has two heads for a moment, “Where was all this wisdom about 20 minutes ago when I was hyperventilating?”

Tom shrugs, “Who knows? I really just pulled that out of my,”

“Alright!” Jensen pulls his legs towards his middle, pushes up with his arms and does a sort of sit and spin so he is upright again. “Enough of your brand of help. It’s not getting me anywhere.”

“Yes it is.” Tom replies as he leans back and starts to prop his feet up on the coffee table in front of him. “I gave you a place to start.”

“Maybe. But don’t put your feet up there, and put that magazine back where you got it.”

“Fine. It’s been so long since we’ve hung out in here I almost forgot what it looked like,”

Jensen ignored the barb and started to actually think about what Tom had said. “What did you mean about what I wanted this to mean?”

Tom rolls his eyes and explains, “Where do you want this relationship to go? Two weeks from now? Ten months? For forever? Start with how you feel about him and work from that.”

“Ok.”

“But don’t forget. You have a boyfriend. He may be planning something as well,”

“Oh God…this is more complicated than I thought,” Jensen moans. “Who celebrates Valentine’s Day as their first holiday together? It’s supposed to be Christmas or Thanksgiving or the Fourth of July.” At the incredulous look from Tom he continues, “when people separate for Thanksgiving or Christmas it’s with the thought I’m leaving this person I care about to go spend time with my family and be together and bullshit. And the 4th is a relaxed ‘let’s introduce you to my family,’ type holiday. How did I skip the ones with training wheels and head straight into ‘I love you’,roses and rings!” Jensen ends a little hysterically.

“Ok you need to calm down. This isn’t really that serious.” Tom gets up and moves to join Jensen on the couch. As he tosses an arm across Jensen’s shoulder he continues, “You like him right?” When he doesn’t respond Tom squeezes his shoulder, “Right?”

“Yea,” the response is barely audible from where Jensen has his head ducked between his scrunched up shoulders.

“Then plan something you enjoy doing with each other. And not something in the sack…that’s generally an unplanned bonus,” Tom jostles Jensen a little.

“Unplanned, huh?”

“Well, at least on my part,” a smile is sent his way.

Jensen just laughs. “Your boyfriend is crazy. Thanks for calming me down, I just don’t want to screw this up.”

“You’re not going to, you’ll be great.”

“Here’s hoping,”

______________________________________________________________________

“So what are you going to do for Genevieve on Valentine’s Day?” Jared asks his friend.

“Mmmph,” Chad mumbles around the toasted sandwich he is all but inhaling.

“hmm. I’m sure she’ll love that…” Jared says dryly.

“Bitch,” Chad growls before he takes a swallow of his soda. “I’m going to take her to that French restaurant on Preston Road.”

“Oh, she’s talked about that for a while,”

“I know, ever since her uppity cousin went and then waxed poetic about the cuisine…”

Jared huffs a laugh, “I’m sure it wasn’t all that bad.”

Chad just shudders, “So, what are you going to do for your other half?”

“I haven’t really decided. I’m not sure whether I should take point on this and plan something or if I should let Jensen have the lead.”

“I see your point,” Chad finishes off his soda and lets out a disgusting sound. “One more reason I would never date another dude. If I’m the only guy in the relationship I already know what’s expected of me.”

Jared wrinkles his nose at his friend’s belch, “yea, because that is a completely valid reason to pass on love,”

“Nah, you know what I mean, I get that you like dudes, I’m all for it.” A wolf like expression crosses his face, “Less completion for me.”

“I’m telling your girl you said that,”

“No! That’s totally not what I meant.” Chad’s phone starts to vibrate across the table. “What I was going to say is that there isn’t this tension about what I’m supposed to do or which one of us is going to plan stuff. It’s just expected I will.”

Jared uses Chad’s inattention to slip in an insult “I can see where that might be comforting for those of you atrophied brains and small hearts.” he gestures with his fork before putting it back on his salad plate.

“Hmm,” Chad just nods as he finishes pecking out a reply. “Hey! My heart isn’t small; my girl’s got it,”

“Ahh, and I noticed you didn’t refute the atrophied brain,” Jared points out as Chad lobs a rolled up napkin at his head. “The size of your brain aside, I was thinking of just having dinner at home. You know maybe saving all the bells and whistles for our six month anniversary or something.”

Chad nods.

“We’ve only been going out for about two months so I don’t want to overdo it, but I also don’t want to overlook it.” Jared explains.

Another nod.

“I mean, Valentine’s Day is usually a big thing, if you’ve been together awhile. I just don’t know what he thinks awhile constitutes.”

One more nod.

“You’re all sorts of help, Chad.” Jared states sarcastically as he sends a glare his friend’s way.

“I’m just waiting for you to quit whining like a girl so I can talk some sense through all that hair…”

“Please, everyone loves my hair,” he runs his fingers through his bangs and grins when the teenage waitress practically melts at the table while refilling their drinks.

“Ha. Cause she was such a good judge of hair.” Chad mumbles.

Jared just raises an eyebrow.

“So about this wisdom…” the question just hangs in the air while Chad tries to gather his thoughts.

“Well, the way I look at it. You should talk to your boy before it gets too much closer. Iron out some of the main details. The when and the where, for example. And then compromise on the rest of it.” At Jared’s encouraging smile he continues. “One of you can be responsible for dinner, and the other responsible for any entertainment or music, along with wine and dessert.”

“huh.”

“What?” Chad asks.

“That’s actually a really good idea.”

“I know,” Chad buffs his nails on his jacket. “I do have them from time to time.”

“Thanks, Chad.”

“Don’t mention it, dude.”

______________________________________________________________________

Jensen adjusted the lighting above the dining room table for the fourth time. Just a little more light. He continues to fiddle with the switch. There. Perfect. Romantic, but subtle. Once the lighting issue is fixed he makes his way around the rest of the apartment double checking the wine Jared had sent over earlier, putting in the blank disc in the CD player as instructed. He smiled to himself. I have an awesome boyfriend.

Just as he finishes his thought there’s a knock on the door. Here we go. Jensen makes his way to the front of the apartment. He unlocks the front door to find Jared smiling at something on his phone.

“Hey babe.” Jared leans in to finish his greeting with a quick kiss as he makes his way into the apartment.

“Hi,” when the door is closed Jared crowds Jensen against the door to kiss him again.

“Much better. I wanted a proper kiss to start.” Jensen looks up and smiles.

“Great plan.”

“I thought so.” Jared smiles as he juggles the bag in his hand and his phone while he shrugs off his coat.

“What’s this?” Jensen asks as he tries to get the bag out of Jared’s greedy fingers, but he isn’t letting loose.

“Nah huh. Not until later.” Once the jacket is secure on the hook by the door, and his shoes toed off Jared puts his arm around his boyfriend. “Dinner ready?”

“Yea, it’s in the oven, just being kept warming.” The boys make their way down the hall into the living room. There Jensen stops Jared, “I thought we decided not to get each other gifts this time?” He leans into his boyfriend’s warmth; despite having come from the chilly weather outside he still feels toasty.

“Hmm hmm. We did,” one of Jared’s hands squeeze at the back of Jensen’s neck. “But if that bag over there is anything to go by, I’m not the only one to have cheated a little,”

Jensen chuckles as he pecks Jared on the mouth, then pushes away to head into the kitchen. “Take a seat. Dinner is ready. I just need to carry the warming dishes to the table.”

“Need any help?” Jared asks as he sets his bag next to Jensen’s on the corner table. He makes his way to the dining room table, and takes in the scene Jensen had set. There was a deep red table cloth spread across that contrasted nicely with the cream of Jensen’s dishes. The good silverware had been busted out and placed in front of fancily folded napkins. The only thing lacking was that the candles hadn’t been lit yet.

“It looks great.” He said loud enough to be heard in the kitchen as he picked up the lighter to add the finishing touches as Jensen made his way in carrying a covered dish.

“I’m glad you like it. I though it looked nice enough without going completely over the top.”

“It’s perfect.” Jared watches him set the dish on the left side of the table and then head back to the kitchen. Jensen repeats this twice before they sit down.

Once he is actually seated some of the nerves seem to melt off Jensen. Apparently the food making it to the table without anything being dropped or forgotten was half the battle. Jensen unfolds his napkin and places it in his lap before he looks up to find Jared smiling at him softly.

“Hi,”

“Hey,” Jared stretches his hand across the table palm up. When he has secured his prize, he rubs his thumb over the back of Jensen’s. “So what did you make us?” Jared’s question reminds Jensen that the food needed served. He starts uncovering things and putting portions on both plates.

“Well, I made it, but I had some help from our moms” he says as he add a second scoop of potatoes beside the steak on Jared’s plate.

“Ours? As in plural?”

Jensen laughs nervously, “Yea, I called Megan to ask a couple questions, and the next thing I knew I was talking to your mom.” Then he remembers everything that he had talked to Sherri about and grins a little bit smugly, “she had all the answers.”

Jared groaned, “Oh God…”

Jensen’s laugh was louder and more heartfelt this time.

“Don’t worry, babe. She didn’t tell me anything too incriminating.” Jensen pats Jared’s hand before seating himself once more.

“I doubt that.”

“Well, you’ll never know. I was sworn to secrecy.”

“That’s unfair. I’m your boyfriend.”

“You are indeed, but she is your mother,” Jensen stresses the title, “she could kill me and they would never find the body.”

Jared chuckles as he cuts into his New York Strip. “Hmm. Just between rare and medium, it looks amazing, Jen.”

“Thanks. It was the first time I tried to cook steak without a grill,” Jensen replies as he cuts into his own. The moans that fall from both boys’ mouths are just short of obscene. They share a look filled with mutual affection, for each other and the food.

They spend the next little working through the food on the table. After a particularly flavorful bite Jensen stops to take a sip. When he sets his wine glass back on the table he notices Jared staring at him.

“Something wrong, Jay?”

“No,” Jared says softly. “I was thinking about how gorgeous you are. The candle light is playing off your hair and highlighting your face, it makes you looks almost other worldly.” Jensen ducks his head at the comment.

“You done?”

“Yea, let me get the dessert from the fridge. I’ll meet you in the living room.”

Once the chocolate cheesecake drizzled with raspberry sauce is set safely on the table with the single fork, Jensen settles himself under Jared’s arm. They spend the next few moments quietly cuddling.

“You did a great job, Jen.” Jared says as he runs his fingers up and down Jensen’s arm.

He looks up at Jared, “We did a good job. It was a team effort,”

“Yea, I guess we did,” a kiss is pressed onto Jensen’s forehead. “I’m looking forward to next year.” Jared says, for the first time putting out the option for this thing between them to be something more than just right now, for this relationship to be long term.

Jensen looks up when what has been said registers, “yea?”

Their eyes meet, a chance for forever in a single shared glance, before Jared responds, “Yea.”

Part 4 is done! Yay!

I'm almost done! Then I can go to bed! whhoooo! :)

I hope you enjoyed it. :)

Thanks for stopping by.

Schmoop Bingo - Amnesty - Cooking Together

write_in_red — Tue, 31 May 2011 12:46:26 GMT

Title: Kissing the Cooks
Prompt: Cooking together
Medium: fic
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: RPS Slash
Summary: The boys cook, at least they give it a valiant try.

“You hungry yet?”

“Not really,”

“I think you are,”

“I’m pretty sure I would know if I was hungry,”

“Well, since you have paid hardly any attention to me since I walked into the apartment and crawled onto the couch, I doubt you’re paying any attention to your stomach,” Jensen points out from his place under Jared’s left arm. The right arm is busy holding a very boring looking document that is the bane of Jensen’s existence.

“That’s not true. I’ve been playing with your hair and rubbing your back,” Jared defends himself.

“Bah. You only pet me when I wiggle,” he demonstrates by rubbing up against Jared’s side and almost nuzzling under his chin.

“Wiggling? I think I could get on board with,”

Jensen hijacks the train Jared’s dirty mind was about to run away with “Nope. No wiggles. Hunger is the topic at hand,”

“Sadness,”

“Indeed.”

“Ok, oh hungry one,” Jared puts down his papers and caps his highlighter. “What do you want to eat?” he asks as he turns towards Jensen just a hair to encourage full body cuddling.

“Hmm hmm” the slight shifting allows Jensen to burrow deeper into Jared’s embrace, tucking his face into Jared’s shoulder.

“I thought you were hungry. Don’t you know what you want to eat?”

The muffler, “No, I’m just hungry,” makes Jared chuckle. “What about Hu Nan’s?” he suggests.

“Nope, we had that yesterday.”

“Ahh, Luigi’s?” he offers as he trails his fingers down Jensen’s back.

“Day before that.”

“Chelle’s?”

“You had it for lunch two days ago,” Jensen shoots back.

“You’re not really working with me here, I’m running out of ideas and places to pet.”

Jensen scoffs, “run out of places to pet…” he pulls back from Jared’s shoulder and flips onto his back.

“I see, well, having more real estate to run my hand over isn’t going to fix the food problem.”

“I’m aware. But I’m just so tired of going out.”

“I know, babe.” A soft kiss is pressed at Jensen’s temple as the boys just enjoy the quiet moment.

“It’s just so tiring, eating the same things over and over.”

“I know what you mean; sometimes I wish my Mama lived closer,”

“oh?”

“She makes the best fried chicken, with mashed potatoes and corn on the cob,” Jensen can practically feel the drool falling from his boyfriend’s lips when it hits him.

“ha!” he bolts out of Jared’s arms and spins around. “We should make dinner! You know, cook ourselves.”

“cook?”

“Yea, we could have steak, you love steak.”

Jared smiles, “I could eat steak. Oh, with mashed potatoes?”

“And corn on the cob?”

“And some rolls.” Jensen gets up and starts to tug Jared off the couch, “Come on, we need to do inventory.”

“I thought we were cooking?”

“We are, but we need to know what we should get at the market. You know, make a list, be prepared. So we don’t have to run all over the place.” He explains as he rifles through the junk drawer for a pad of paper and a pen.

Jared drops a kiss on Jensen’s left shoulder as he passes him to get to the fridge. “So, what do we need?” he asks with the door open to both the freezer and the fridge.

“Well, you have any steak?”

“Nope.” A scribble accompanies the negative response.

“what about frozen rolls?”

“Nu huh.” More furious scribbles.

“K, potatoes? And the fixings?”

“Double Negative.”

Jensen frowns at the lengthy list. He turns to face Jared. “This could take a bit longer than originally planned since we don’t actually have anything we need.”

“That is tragic.”

“I know.”

“We need something simple,” Jared suggests. “Something that we can grab quickly at the store or throw together from stuff we already have. I don’t want to spend all evening in here. I would actually like to spend some quality time with my boyfriend.”

Jensen smiles, and steps forward to look around Jared and into the tiny pantry. It’s pretty sparse in there, mostly empty shelves with a few Jared “staples”, made up mostly of extremely sugary substances. Pop tarts, Frosted Flakes, snack cakes, and some old Halloween candy. But behind the box of Frosted Flakes he might have found their salvation.

He presents the box of pasta with a flourish to Jared. “Pasta?”

“Pasta.”

___________________________________________________________

“I’m really glad you had that jar of tomato sauce at your place.”

“Me too. Good call reminding me to check my apartment. Remind me to thank Kenzie for trying to get me to eat at home once in a while. She saved us a trip to the market.”

“True story,” Jared agrees as he opens the box of rotini pasta. “How much should we put in there?” he asks as he gestures towards the boiling pot.

“I haven’t a clue,” Jensen shrugs. “All of it, I guess.”

“Ok. All of it it is.”

“Why do you have rotini anyway?”

“Who knows, probably because it looked fun.” Jared upends the box over the pot. At first a few pieces make their way into the pan, but that one falls and the rest of the pasta falls into the pan in a large clump scalding him in the process.

“Ow ow ow!”

Jensen spins around from where he was pulling silverware from the second drawer. “What happened?”

“Splashed! It was hot.” While Jared is explaining Jensen guides him across the small kitchen to the sink.

“Here, run it under some cool water. I’ll see if you have anything cold in the freezer.”

“I think there’s a bottle of rum left over from when we had the guys over a couple weeks ago. I imagine that it.” Jared mumbles as he adjusts the water to be a little bit colder.

“Rum? What were we drinking that had rum in it?”

“Who knows,” Jared answers, “Mike brought it over.”

“Ahh, that makes sense.” The abused fingers are pulled away from the sink, dried off and examined for the severity of injury. “Well, I think you’ll live. I found a package of frozen green beans, so you don’t have to clutch the rum bottle like an alcoholic.”

“ha ha. You burn your fingers and see how you feel.”

“It was a twofold plan. I figured once your fingers were feeling a little better we could heat them up to go with our pasta. Sound like a plan?” Jared stands still while Jensen wraps the green beans up in a towel and presses them into his hand. “Why don’t you head to the living room and clear a space on the coffee table. We can eat in there and watch a movie.”

He pouts as he is ushered out of the kitchen with the package of frozen green beans curled in one hand, “I wanted the rum. It would dull my pain…”

___________________________________________________________

“So, whatdya think?” Jensen asks as he sets him empty plate on the table and grabs the remote to start looking for something more interesting to watch.

“I think we did a good job. Go us.”

“Us, huh?” A skeptical glance is sent Jared’s way.

“Well, you.” Jared says, “But I was wounded in battle!” to prove his point, he holds up his right hand that is still a faint red color.

“Yes, poor baby,” a kiss is pressed to the wound, and then another to Jared’s temple.

With their earlier couch positions reversed, Jared takes his time hunching down into the couch once his own plate is deposited on the table. He is covering equal parts of his boyfriend and the couch when he speaks again. “I think we should try this whole cooking thing again. Except, with more preparation next time.”

“Yea?” Jensen smoothes Jared’s bangs away from his face.

“Yea. I liked cooking with you, well, all but the getting burned part.”

“It was fun, wasn’t it. It felt nice to work together and then sit down to eat together.”

“Hmm Hm.” Jared is practicing snuggling and doesn’t really answer except to place a kiss on Jensen’s collar bone.

“But we might need to work on stocking both kitchens before we plan to do this again. Either that or cooking lessons…”

Continued in Part Four

3 down, and 2 to go.

Project Schmoop_Bingo is almost finished!

Schmoop Bingo - Amnesty - Flowers

write_in_red — Tue, 31 May 2011 12:37:28 GMT

Title: An Iris by Any Other Name
Prompt: Flowers
Medium: fic
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: RPS Slash
Summary: Jensen tries to ask Jared out...with flowers.

“What kind of flowers do you buy to impress someone?”

“Jenny, just pick a bunch of flowers, put a card in it and let’s go.”

“Don’t call me Jenny! My name is Jensen, you bald freak.”

“Freak?” Mike turns to talk to the middle aged woman who was trying to edge past the two, “He’s buying flowers for a guy, and he calls me a freak…”

“Sorry about him,” he gives Mike’s arm a tug to pull him out of the lady’s way, “he didn’t take his medicine this morning.”

“Hey!”

“Shut up.” Jensen groans and runs his fingers through his hair, squeezes the back of his neck before letting his hand fall to his side. Fucking Rosenbaum. He’s a psycho. Why is he here? Why I am here? Him. Right, flowers for the gorgeous guy across the hall, and hopefully he’ll agree to go on a date with me… The sound of Mike humming the theme to Star Trek pulls him from his thoughts. What is he doing?“Why are you here?”

“You asked for my help,” Mike shrugs and explains like it was completely obvious.

“No, I asked for Tom’s help,” Jensen corrects him as he starts examining the different kinds of roses in front of him.

“Well, Tommy’s a little busy, and here I am to stand in and be helpful and shit.”

“Lucky Me. You know there is a reason I asked Tom for his help and not you, right?”

“Can I help you?” Both guys turn towards the voice. Standing there with a wide smile on her face is a pretty brunette in the flower shop smock.

“Yes, actually you can,” Mike jumps in before Jensen can even open his mouth. Mike flashes the clerk a wide grin and claps a hand on Jensen’s shoulder. “He wants to buy some flowers for the hot guy who moved into the apartment on his floor, and is hoping that if all goes well the guy will take pity on his ugly ass and agree to a date. See, he suffers from erect…mumph,” Jensen slaps his hand over Mike’s mouth non to gently. Mike eyes get a hard glint in them.

“I’m sorry about that, ignore him.” Jensen keeps his hand over Mike’s mouth as he shifts his body so he can see the assistant. “I’m trying to asking this guy out, and flowers seemed like a good idea at the time…”

The assistant smiles at him as she offers an introduction and her help. Mike takes the time that passes while Jensen is trying to explain the situation to lull him into a false sense of security and when he least expects it… “Ouch! Damn it, Mike!” He yanks his hand away from Mike’s mouth to inspect the damage.

“That’s what you get for trying to smother me.” Mike straightens his shoulders and tugs at the waist line of his shirt while he waits for Jensen to stop being a girl about getting bit.

“Jesus, get over it, I didn’t bite you that hard.”

“You two are funny,” the girl says, “but it seems like if I can help you get the right bouquet we can get you two out of here and on your way before any more injuries can happen,” the smile she delivers her speech with is just short of a smirk.

Jensen looks relived at the offer of help, “Thank you so much. I really appreciate this.” He gets ready to step away from Mike, but stops and wipes his right hand on Mike’s shirt, “Ok, now we can go.”

“Eww, man.” Mike pulls out the front of his shirt to see the damage.

“Shouldn’t have bit me,” is the reply that drifts back as Jensen walks farther into the shop with the assistant.

________________________________________________

“So what do you want this bouquet to say?” the girl wanders behind a table to grab a pen and paper.

“To say? What do you mean?” Jensen is a bit confused. He didn’t want to actually say anything other than the actual ‘will you go out with me?’ question. The blank look apparently amuses his helper because she breaks out in giggles.

After she has sufficiently composed herself she begins to explain, “Flowers can tell a story. It’s not just classic roses for all around occasions. There are hundreds of different kinds of beautiful flowers that can say what you can’t.” That kind of explanation seems to brighten his mood, because he has a sudden question.

“Is there a flower that symbolizes possibilities?”

“Possibilities?”

“Yea, I’m sorry, but I didn’t catch your name.” Jensen apologizes.

“That’s alright, I’m Sandy,”

“Right, Sandy, possibilities. I mean. We’ve only really talked once, but he was amazing. He made me laugh, and his smile…” the color of Jensen’s eyes deepen a little as he remembers the shared cocoa with affection.

Sandy doesn’t respond right away, and Jensen feels his heart drop a little. “Well, I don’t know of any flowers right off the top of my head that having a defined meaning of ‘possibilities’; but we could make a bouquet that says that. It could have a couple different types of flowers with different meanings, when wrapped up together could get your message across.” She looks at him across the table. “Sound like something you’re up for?”

“Yea, totally. Let’s do it.”

“Awesome, so here is what we could put in there…”

________________________________________________

Jensen is nervous. He hasn’t been this tense since he and Randy were almost caught by his parents sophomore year of high school, especially since he hadn’t told them he was into guys yet, yea…that would have been awkward. Come on. You can do this. Open the front door, walk the three feet to his door and knock. You have the flowers. You did all this work, he’s gonna say yes. He has to. He feels better after his little pep talk, so he squares his shoulders nods to himself. Yes. This is it.

With that thought, he opens up his front door and crosses the hallway to Jared’s door. He takes a deep breath, and then raises his hand to knock. But before he can knock the door is opened, and Jared is there asking him, “What’s up?”

“Umm,” Actually standing in front of Jared with the flowers in hand seems to have short circuited his brain, because Jensen can’t make the words leave his mouth. Jared’s gaze turns a touch concerned when Jensen doesn’t say anything.

“You ok, Jensen?” Jared reaches out to touch his arm and notices the flowers he is holding by side for the first time. His eyes dart back up to Jensen’s.

“Those for me?”

“Uh. Yea,” Jared’s question seems to snap Jensen out of his funk. “Yea. These are for you,” he hands the flowers over.

“Thanks. They’re great,” They both just stand in the door way silent for a moment.

“You want…”

“I was…”

The two share a laugh, and Jensen motions for Jared to go ahead first, “You want to tell me what they mean?”

“You know they have meanings? Man, does everybody? I must have missed the memo, because I didn’t know till I was standing in the shop looking a little lost.” Jensen rubs the back of his neck then stuffs his hands in the pocket of his jeans, just for something to do with them. Jared chuckles.

“I’m sure it wasn’t as bad as all that.”

“No man, it really was. The nice girl was helpful. Helped me decide what I wanted it,” he gestures to the bouquet, “to say.”

“So what does it say?”

“Well,” he starts naming off the flowers. “This one, the pink Camellia, is, um well,” a blush stains Jensen’s cheeks as he stutters, “I don’t know if I can explain it to you, but I have this,” he hands Jared an index card that has the name, color and meaning of each of the flowers. Jared takes the card and reads through it. He then looks at the card and the bouquet together before looking back at Jensen.

“I like it. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.”

“I think I get it. It’s like you’re saying we can have a great friendship with the Iris. And the pink Camellia means you long for me,” at this point Jared blushes a bit, but continues on, “and the Jonquil say that you are hoping for more, that this,” Jared motions between the two of them, “has a chance for something real. You know, possibilities.”

They share a look that seems to break just a second before stretching on for forever, and Jensen knows they’re still standing in the door way of Jared’s apartment; and also he knows that Jared hasn’t really said he will go out with him, but he decides he wouldn’t change a thing.

“Exactly.”

Continued in Part Three

Yay! Part two is posted! Whoo! This one was beated back in the day, again by the lovely tattoo_kink. Any remaining mistakes are mine.

Also! I have no idea whether or not that would even be an attractive boquet, but the meanings seemed to fit...so don't judge too harshly if you know what would look like...lol. I got the meanings of the flowers from 800florals.com

Thanks for reading. :)

Schmoop Bingo - Amnesty - Cocoa

write_in_red — Tue, 31 May 2011 12:25:37 GMT

Title: For the Love of Cocoa
Prompt: hot chocolate
Medium: fic
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: RPS Slash
Summary: Jared and Jensen meet and then bond over hot chocolate.

“Jared,” the brunette guy looks up back towards the guy jogging down the stairs of his apartment building.

“Yea, what’s up?”

“I think that’s almost the last of it,”

“Awesome, Chad, you’re a life saver,”

“I know,” the blonde preens for a moment.

“Please,” the girl with Chad snorts, “Don’t tell him that, he’ll get a big head, and then he’ll never fit through the door of our apartment.” Chad shoots an offended look at his girlfriend and Jared just laughs.

“You’re the best ever, Genny,” Jared reaches over to brush a kiss across the girl’s forehead, “tell me again how you ended up with this douche bag?”

“Hey!”

“Well, it was either him or wait for you to turn straight, and since I didn’t see that happening ever… I figured I would work with what I got,” the smile that crosses Genevieve’s face is bright, but softens as she glances at the pout her boyfriend is sporting.

“You’re my best friend, and you’re my girl…You’re supposed to stand up for me, not against me. It’s in the code.”

“What code is that?” Jared asks from his position leaning on the side of his SUV.

“Yea, I didn’t get a code.” Chad just groans.

After a moment of silence between the three, Genevieve steps forward to hug Jared and whisper something in his ear. Chad’s pout turns to a scowl, “Baby, don’t be like that. I was just telling Jared how I was going to make it up to you,”

“Yes!”

“Hey! Hey! None of that, keep your hetero sex to yourself,” Jared and Chad share a manly one armed embrace as they say good bye.

“We forgot a box,” Genevieve states, “I noticed it when I was going to close the hatch.”

Both boys lean around the back to check out the size of the box, “Need any help?”

“Nah, I got this. Ya’ll go on. Seriously, thanks guys, you’ve made this move so easy for me.”

“We’re just glad to have you closer, Jay,” Chad has one arm around his girl but claps his hand on Jared’s shoulder as a last farewell. “Come on by tomorrow, we’ll have a beer and watch some T.V.” A smack to his middle has Chad changing his mind, “or, we may be watching a Rom Com…”

“Much better,”

Jared chuckles and waves as they head towards their parked car. I’m glad it’s just this one box. I’m ready to be done, this has been the longest weekend of my life. I hate moving. It wasn’t just the unloading part that sucked; the worst part was the starting all over. New job, new town, new everything. Despite Jared’s fun loving personality he didn’t make friends easily, well, at least close friends. He made pals wherever he went; his mother said it was all because of his dimples.

It’s a good thing I already know a few people here, if not I’d never leave my apartment. He thinks as he manages to wrestle the box from the back of his Durango. After slamming the door, he puts the keys in the pocket of his stained cargo shorts. He wheels around to head up the steps to the front door of his apartment building. Great! I should have propped open the door. And I would save the largest box till after all my help has left…fuck. Well, let’s see if we can do this.

Jared tries balancing the awkward box on his knee while trying to open the front door. After the third failed attempt he heaves a sigh. He turns towards the stairs; only to be blocked by a figure at the bottom. Jared takes in the man’s form. He was tall, even with his shoulders hunched slightly, had a trim waist, and a set of long legs. His eyes narrow when he realizes that the hunched shoulders weren’t from the weight of the bags the stranger is holding, but rather from trying to hold in the laughter that is shaking his body. He briefly contemplates throwing the box at the jerk.

Jared opens his mouth to ask the guy to get the hell out of his way, but before he can say anything the stranger in front of him lifts his head. Jared is struck by how attractive he is; his green eyes full of mirth and his bow shaped mouth twitching up at the corners. Doesn’t matter how attractive he is; the bastard just stood there and laughed at me.

“Sorry man, I shouldn’t have laughed; but I couldn’t help myself. You gotta admit, coming home to see a giant juggling a box and performing a complex balancing act is enough to make anyone smile,” the guy explains.

Jared cracks a small smile at the apt interpretation of his attempt to get in the door without having to put down the box.

“I would have offered to help, but you seemed pretty focused. I didn’t want to spook you and be the cause of a collapse. Here let me help you with the door,” the stranger jogs up the three steps to the door and opens it wide for Jared to step through.

“Thanks.” Jared shifts the box a little higher in an attempt to lessen the burn in his arm muscles.

“No problem, man. Least I can do.” The two of them cross the lobby and stop in front of the elevator. After the up button is pushed the guy turns to him and asks, “Which floor?”

“Fourth.” Just as he answers the doors pop open and both step into the small space.

“Oh hey, we live on the same floor,” there is an easy silence between the two, filled only with the quirky elevator music. The stranger angles his body a little towards Jared, “I’m Jensen by the way.”

“Jared.”

The elevator dings as it reaches the fourth floor and the hallway is revealed as the doors slide open. “Home sweet home. Do you need any help with your door?”

“I don’t…huh. I can’t remember if I left it open,” Jared walks out of the elevator first, leading the way down the carpeted hallway with long strides. Jensen just follows more sedately behind, Jared comes to a stop in front of 4C. The door is closed.

“Damn it.”

“I got it,” Jensen leans around Jared to twist the knob and push the door open.

“Thanks.”

“No problem,” Jared walks a few feet into the apartment and sets the heavy box down with a sigh and shakes his arms to alleviate the tingling that was starting to settle in. I need to start lifting again. But I’m too tired. I need to sit down with a beer and a pizza. I’ll order the pizza right after I close the door. He grabs the hem of his shirt and pulls it up to wipe his forehead, I can’t believe I sweat this much. It’s frickin’ November. He completes his rotation to face the open door and notices the guy still standing in his door.

He surveys the guy in front of him, taking a closer look. There are freckles dusted across the bridge of the straight nose, hair tousled in the ‘it takes 50 minutes to make my hair look this effortlessly sexy look’, the shirt he is wearing is tight across a nice looking chest, those long legs were in a pair of expensive jeans, and he had cowboy boots on. While Jared is taking stock of the man in front of him he runs his fingers through the damp hair lying on his forehead. He clears his throat to get the man’s attention; the guy was unusually focused on something. “You ok?”

Jensen’s yanks his head up, eyes slightly glazed and a blush starts to tint his cheeks pink, “huh? Oh. Yea,” Jensen reaches up to rub the back of his neck dropping his eyes for a moment. When he lifts his eyes again they are warm and the glaze is gone, “I’m uh, gonna go. But if you need any help with anything, be sure to let me know.” He starts to back out the door and bumps into the door jam. “I’m right across the hall. See you later.” With that Jensen turns around and beats a hasty retreat to his own door.

Jared just shakes his head and smiles, “strange guy,” and the sound of two doors closing echo down the hall.

__________________________________________________________

Jared sees the other guy a couple times in the next few weeks, sometimes he is in the company of a tall, dark haired guy, who Jared can admit to himself is quite good looking. He is also seen exiting the apartment building with a leggy brunette in a little black dress, and a few times he is getting his mail in the morning when Jared is getting back from his jog. Jensen always has a smile for Jared when their eyes meet, and Jared starts to think of him as “green eyes” in his head.

The next time they actually have a conversation; they run into each other quite by accident on aisle 5 of the local grocery store. Jared is engrossed in his shopping list. It’s turning colder, and since he is feeling festive, he would like to be able to light a fire in his fireplace and settle down with a cup of cocoa on his leather couch. He spots a single container of Nesquik on an aisle cap, sitting on the edge of the top shelf. Ah ha. Last item on the list. I’m finished. Finally.

He reaches up with his right hand to grab the last one. Just as his fingers close around the right side of the rectangular container, another set of fingers grasp the container from the left side. There is a struggle, but after a moment, it seems there is a draw. Both hands move the Nesquik over the edge of shelf and down to a more manageable level. Jared steps forward towards the corner and stops short.

Jensen’s eyes light up at the sight of Jared, and it warms a place in Jared that the easy smile stretching across Jensen’s face is for him.

“Hey,”

“Hey,” Both just stand there, eyeing each other and the cocoa between them.

“I had it first,” Jared says.

“Hardly, it was a tie. Besides if you had it first it would have been in your basket, not on the shelf for the grabbing,” Jensen jokes.

“I was putting it in my basket,” Jared tugs at the container a little.

“Well, you can’t have it, I have ahold of it too,” Jensen tries to pull the cocoa back his way.

“We’re fighting over hot chocolate,”

Jared laughs, “So it seems, but it’s very important stuff,” the smile that had been tipping up the corners of his mouth changes into a full blown grin. “I’m bigger than you, I’ll win,” Jared warns as the tug of war for the cocoa kicks up a notch.

“You might,” Jensen’s eyes crinkle up at the edge as his smile gets wider, “I don’t mind if you try,”

Jared raises a single eyebrow, “Really?”

Jensen continues to smile and shrugs, it is during the seconds that Jensen is moving his shoulder up and down that Jared gets an idea. His grin turns wicked for a moment before smoothing out to a simple smile.

Jensen’s eyes narrow at Jared, “It looks like we’re at a stalemate,”

“Indeed,” while Jared answers he is inching his fingers a little closer to the middle of the container. The yellow rectangular container is only a few inches across and it doesn’t take a whole lot of movement to have his thumb near the tips of Jensen’s fingers. He flashes a smile at Jensen.

Now Jensen is really suspicious, “I’m not sure what you have planned, but I’m not letting go of this chocolate. I want it,”

Jared begins to rub his thumb over the tips of Jensen’s fingers. “I really want it too,”

“Hmm,” a moment more of the gentle rubbing of his thumb over Jensen’s fingers and he is able to see a different sort of emotion creep into Jensen’s eyes. A heated look is shared between the two. It is during this exchange that Jared finally pulls the cocoa from Jensen’s hand.

“Thanks,” Jared steps closer and smiles at Jensen as he deposits the hard won chocolate in his cart.

“Hmm? Hey! That was dirty,”

Jared shrugs, “You’re right, but I really wanted this,” Jared smiles at the flabbergasted look Jensen is wearing and brushes his shoulder against the other man’s as he walks towards the check out.

__________________________________________________________

“It’s fuckin’ freezing. Yes, I know it’s December, but this is ridiculous. This is Texas.” Jared holds his cell phone between his ear and shoulder. Despite having a free hand he is having trouble getting his cold fingers to close properly around the door handle. “Great. I can’t get the door open,” Jared listens to the voice on the other end of the line. “You know what, just shut up, you’re no help. I know more trips would make more sense, but I don’t want to come back outside. As I’ve just pointed out it’s cold enough to freeze off my…”

The clearing of a throat gets his attention. He half turns towards the sound, there is Jensen. “We have to stop meeting like this, man.”

Jared chuckles. “It’s doubtful; I always try to carry too much at one time,”

“Here, let me help this time, no laughing.”

“Thanks. I appreciate it,” Jared steps to the side to let Jensen open the door, “What? Yea, I hear you. Let me call you back when I get the stuff all put away. Ok. Bye.”

Jensen makes sure the door is completely closed to keep the chill of the air out of the lobby, Jared turns to him, “Hey Jensen, can you grab my phone please, I think I’m going to lose it,”

“Sure,” He reaches up to grab the phone from where it is resting between Jared’s shoulder and his ear, as he does his fingers brush the side of Jared’s face. His hand falls to his side as Jared rolls his shoulder once to ease out the kink from keeping it bunched up for too long.

Jared scrutinizes Jensen’s face before turning and heading towards the elevators. He hits the up arrow and enters with Jensen who hits the button for their floor. They take the ride in silence, enjoying the quiet. Once on their floor they exit the elevator and head towards their apartments. At their separate doors, they share an easy smile.

Before Jensen steps into his apartment he realizes he is still holding Jared’s cell, “Oh, hey, I have your phone,”

“Thanks.” Jared steps back into the hall after setting his stuff at on the table inside the door. The phone changes hands, but Jensen doesn’t step back into his own apartment. He just sort of rocks back and forth on his heels for a moment.

“I was wondering if you would like to get a coffee sometime,” His eyes are hopeful as he asks.

“Nah,” Jared watches Jensen’s shoulder fall, “but I love hot chocolate. And I happen to have some. It’s really good. I had to fight for it. But I really wanted it,” he says as he turns back into his apartment.

“Yea?”

“Yea.” Jensen steps forward to follow Jared into his apartment before he remembers his own door is open. After checking that he has his keys he pulls his door shut and crosses the hall into Jared’s apartment.

Continued in Part Two

So that is the first part of my bingo. I am horribly late...as in if I don't post it today, the last day of amnesty, I will be disqualified...lol. How horrible. *sigh* oh well. This was betaed by the lovely tattoo_kink back in the day when I first received my card. It has been fiddled with a little, so any remaining mistakes are mine.

I have to say I was depressed with my dividers...for some reason I can't get them to stay in the middle of the page. Bah. There will be further experiments performed at a later date to fix them...

Thanks for stopping by to read.

Hope everyone is having an awesome last day of May!

Life in Oklahoma 1.9

write_in_red — Sat, 16 Apr 2011 05:16:47 GMT

So today is my first day as a 25 year old.

LoL. It's not a whole lot different than being 24.

Yesterday was a good day. I had to work early, so I opened the store, worked for a few hours and then headed home. I was kidnapped for lunch to Olive Garden for yummy goodness. Good food, good friends, and funny stories. The lunch crew came out and sang to me and gave me yummy donuts to dip into caramel, chocolate, and raspberry sauce. Yummy! When I was done with my donuts I decorated my plate with the left over sauces. :) LoL. :) It was fun. :)

After lunch I was kidnapped to our mountains. They are beautiful, small but beautiful. And since I've seen "real" mountains, I know they are really just a big rocky hill...lol. It's my favorite place since I've moved back to Lawton. I bring all my friends there, and when I feel worked up, its where I wanna go to calm down.

On the way down we pulled off to the side of the mountain road, RI wanted to climb up. So we get out of the car and she started up the face. I headed off to the side to come up an easier way. SS started on my side and went up a different path. The wind started to get really bad, and for one second as I tried to bridge a small space I was for sure I was gonna fall and die. LoL. So, I waited for the wind to die down and tried again. I made it to where RI and SS were and told them I was too out of shape for this business, especially when I wasn't wearing proper shoes or hiking clothes.

I head back down to the car when RI said she wanted to finish climbing back up to the top and have me drive the car up to get her. When SS and I were in the car, I head up the mountain, but stop not too far from the little pull off. I look up tho the top where RI is standing on the bluff with her arms out. I yelled to her and she signaled for us to stay there because there wasn't any way for her actually get to the top.

I back down to the pull off, and wait. We sit for a few minutes waiting for her to get down, when she doesn't show we get out of the car. She is in sight, but just barely, and trying to make her way down. I yell up to her, get her attention. She starts yelling at me and waving her arms. "Never back down the fucking mountain again! I thought you were gonna die." I laugh, and gesture to the pull off. Then she lets us know she isn't sure how she is gonna get down. SS and I laugh and then head up the other side to show her how to get down.

When we are ensconced in the car I let her know that while she was picturing how she was gonna tell T what happened to me, I was likewise picturing how I was gonna tell the Kid what happened to his mom. Both scenarios started off with, "Well, you see, what had happened was..." lol.

Later we went to Texas Roadhouse, where T was working the late shift. Yummy steak and fun talk later I was headed off to have a drink with E, M, JT. I have a Prohibidado...which is a nick name for Hynotiq and Pineapple. I bought one for E, because it was his 21st. I two-stepped around the floor with JT, hugged everyone and headed back to work.

RI was overseeing the cleaning of the floors at the store. I got there about 12:30 and made it till about 2:45 a.m. The intervening hour and a half were spent reading Harry Potter and the Sorcerers Stone aloud to RI. I crashed and RI woke me up around 5:50 to head to the car.

That was my birthday. :) Fun day, huh? I am sitting on the RI's couch during this update and she wanted me to state that even more fun things were to come tomorrow. :) Yay.

Next time I will update on my ex's second visit to my lovely state, and the time she spent here, along with whatever adventures we girls get up to tomorrow. :)

Life in Oklahoma 1.8

write_in_red — Sat, 02 Apr 2011 09:00:01 GMT

So, I'm F*ng tired.

Let's just start there. It has been a long two weeks. After T's birthday I had to work a six day work week because we were short handed, then last week I worked seven! shot me in my face.

Seven days! fml. So on my days off I went and got my nails done, they are tipped in a super cute green that has individual crystals in it...I told RI when we were done that it was my very own Kyrptonite. Not that I would be sad about an ill effects, because I'm a total Lex-girl ...ALL the way! I was watching the first disc of Smallville with Mum the other day, and I couldn't help myself. I must have said Michael Rosenbaum was all sorts of sexy a million and ONE times...lol. True story.

The only truly good part of the week was two Wed. ago. Everyone was going out for drinks, by everyone I mean T, M (who she has decided she totally loves, and will someday marry), JT (one of T's old housies, and part of an on going flirtation w/ RI), FN (the other part of an on going flirtation w/ RI), ZM-T (one of the guys who crashed at T's house more often than not), and RI. So here we all are, tensions are high for some stuff as a sister and best friend to two of the individuals I just don't wanna know about. The less said about ANY of the business I'm not already privy to is better! Then we add alcohol. BEST PLAN EVER! Sense my sarcasm? It gets better.

So JT and RI are whispering to each other, everyone is shooting FN looks. I go to the bar for a drink and come back to find the bouncer throwing one of the guys out for running off with one of the umbrellas! FML. By this point everyone is drunk, but because of the thieving of the umbrella we decide its best if we part ways from the bar. I head to Taco Bell to feed the masses, everyone else stops at the gas station for ice, coke and some other snacks.

RI is the only one who has an actual house in the city so everyone invites themselves over. She is drunk as all get out, and doesn't remember half of what went on...As her best friend I was only too happy to fill in the blanks...I mean, it's my job, right? LoL. What I ended up telling her is she ran around kissing people at the house and cozying up to one or two people that weren't expected, but forgiven when taking into account how wasted she was. Then the rum was discovered...lol.

She was sitting on the air mattress in the living room, and ZM-T put the bottle between his legs while so he could gesture wildly about something on the television, when she retrieved said bottle...with her teeth...lol. She was mortified. Te He. Then she opened the bottle and laid back to take a nice long pull. I almost stopped her...but decided she was an adult. There was also a mention of calling Guy #3 over, but I nipped that in the bud, I didn't want any blood shed. LoL. When I was describing this to her she wasn't amused, nor did she enjoy my commentary. I told I just sat there and watched the train wreck, then I made that my facebook status...lol. Immortalized forever!

Eventually everyone passes out, but not before some drama that I am just too tired and mentally scared from to recount. Just let it be said that the Apocalypse happened...

So after everyone but me gets over their hangovers its a normal few days, then its Friday, and a good friend of ours, C, was leaving for overseas with the Army. What do we do in situations like these? Head to the bar! More drinking ensued, drama from the other night reared its head a little, and I also apparently introduced some of my own in the form of a friend from work, SS. She's new to our circle, but she fits in fine.

Friday passes, there's a party on Sat. I don't wanna go, been at work all day, and I'm tired. But I get blackmailed into going, and I have something called Rumplemintz? LoL. Apparently I did a lot of swaying, smiling and talking to the spy...

After we all get home and there is more drama in the form of RI's on again off again girlfriend. Every flirtation aside, RI has always been up front that she is totally in love with her crazy ass girl. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for love, but this girl is a new level of cruel. And T is my sister, I know cruel, I know people playing with others feelings, but this kind of stuff blows my mind. I'm always there for RI, but she knows how I feel about her girl, and how I will be supportive of any decision that she makes. However, if this girl were to disappear, I would only be sad initially for much RI would cry, that's how much of a bitch this girl is. And it takes a lot for me to not like someone...but damn.

Day after third night of drinking this week RI, SS, and myself are sitting in the living room discussing our lives and RI makes the comparison that our lives are like Jersey Shore...fml...And she would be right... She decided that song "F U" or whatever, by Green somebody or other would be our theme song. RI said she would write to MTV and tell them the action was really in Oklahoma, and shit wasn't scripted, this what we came up with on our own! LoL. It was a riot. So, for the past week and a half we have made a zillion references to our show...

That was ALL last week! Then this week I was scheduled to work six days, not asked to work some extra hours, but actually scheduled six days. FML. But our DM was here and he said we couldn't work six days if we had other people to cover the hours, so I got a second blessed day off today. It was fabulous. Slept in, did some stuff for Meems, watched tv with Pops and went and saw RI for a bit after she got off work.

The only notable thing from this week was Tuesday night when RI, SS, and I stayed up most of the night talking and playing video games. The shitty part was we all had to be at work F*ng early, but we made it through the day.

So that was the last two weeks. I only have to work four more before my next day off! yay!

Isn't that sad? I'm so tired that I am calculating how many days till my next day off...tragic, I tell you.

Oh! And my offer of a penpal for a year to Help_Japan went for $40! And I have a new friend! :) I'm pretty excited! So if anyone wants a post card, go ahead and PM me your address and I'll drop one in the mail when I send off my first letter. :)

I'm off to bed, it's about 4 a.m. and I have to work tomorrow night. Yippee.

:)

Life in Oklahoma 1.7

write_in_red — Fri, 11 Mar 2011 04:05:04 GMT

So today was my Friday! Hallejuah!

Seriously, tough week. I had six on with no break to have this weekend off for T's birthday. Then, on top of my six days schedule, they recruited me to do our version of inventory this week, and I had two days of 6 a.m. to 3 p.m...long ass days. They went by quick, but they were long.

One day we inventoried candy and soda, then today we did comics. Both were ridiculous. For one, a huge amount of candy and soda was missing...i.e. stolen. And this morning when we finished scanning all the comics in we finished with just under 14,000. 14,000! Who has a need for that many comics! Not us! LoL.

Anyway, in more fun news, I just watched American Idol for this week. Adam Lambert performed! Hmm hmm hmmmm. Man can sing, and he is sexy as hell. YUM.

I also was running around LJ, and found this. It is two guys doing a cover of Michael Jackson's Smooth Criminal on the CELLO!!!! OMG! So amazing! I nicked it from azure_k_mello. She said it reminded her of J2, and I can kinda see it. Floppy hair? check. Leather jacket & intense stare? check.

Love me some stringed instruments. Almost nothing sexier...almost...ok. That's a lie...there is a list, but its not too long. Ok, that's a lie too... I just started listing the things that would be sexier and it is embarrassingly longer than I had first assumed... *shrugs* oh well. My list. :)

Oh and epic fail. I was on my info page looking for someone the other day and saw a v-gift...only it was from me! LoL. It was a fortune cookie I'm pretty sure I meant to send to tattoo_kink, but it never made it...lol...so dumb.

In other news, I am totally gonna enjoy every second of the next three days off, because I have to work 6 days the next week. We are losing one of our leads at work, and so I was asked to cover half of her hours on top of my own. OMG. I may die. *sigh* But the pay check will be awesome, right? Overtime. hmm...

Alright, I'm off to look for some really yummy clex. For some reason I just thought of that story by Astolat, and I wanna read it again...for the 10th time...no lie. And then find something else fabulous with that pairing...I think it was the scanning of the comics...lol

Life in Oklahoma 1.6

write_in_red — Sat, 05 Mar 2011 04:24:25 GMT

My day off is over...sad days... LoL. Isn't that always the way of it?

I shouldn't be sad, because next week I have three days off in a row for T's 21st birthday...most which I am sure to spend in various degrees of inbriation...lol. What a forecast...

Though, I imagine it is the next 6 days on that give me the willies...oh well, T better love me.

Since my last post I have worked like crazy. That's it. Yep. Boring life is me.

Well, not completely boring. New York Time's Best Seller Kim Harrison was at the store the other day for a book signing. I didn't actually get to meet her till she was walking out the door, I was busy making sure the mad house at the front end was wrangled in a bit and things ran mostly smooth. :)

She was nice enough to autograph my name tag, as well as the complimentary name tags the people who attended the signing received. :) So I have a fancy new autograph. Which, will pale in complete comparison to two other autographs I plan to get this summer...which two you might ask?

Why, let me tell you...they both start with Js...!!!! *insert squee*

Sadly, I won't be getting these autographs in person, but a friend of mine who is going to Comic Con said she will get me their autographs if they are there this summer...when she said yes I practically combusted...it was ridiculous. :)

So that was the life in the time of Me...work. work. work....so boring...I should get something to spice it up... :)

In other news, I am trying to decided what tattoo to get on my left wrist. I haven't fell in love with anything yet though. T has a tattoo that says love one way, and pain another, and I like it, I just don't know if I'm in love with it. *sigh* Though, if I'm being honest, I should probably wait a bit before I get a new one...If I come home with one more anytime soon my mother may have a heart attack...poor thing.

Life in Oklahoma 1.Something

write_in_red — Wed, 23 Feb 2011 20:40:35 GMT

Omg it's been such a long time since I posted. FML. Life has been crazy.

So after T, life had to go on, and it did. I went to work, and planned for my ex-girlfriend's visit. Now, I have been in love twice, one guy and one girl. Let me tell you, love is dumb. What the hell was I thinking when I agreed to a visit in January? 4 days. Damn long time.

Ok, I love her still. We didn't break up because we weren't in love, I broke up with her after we graduated college and we were living in two different states, and everything that we had planned wasn't going to work anymore. I felt like we were causing each other more pain than the love we were getting out of the relationship. It was hard, but it is what it is.

So, we reminded semi-friends. Then we started texting quite a bit in October, and she asked if she moved down here, if we could work it out. I told her if she wants to move down here, then I would tell my Mum I dated a girl, and we would try and work it out...So in all honesty, I didn't think she would ever be ready to leave her family for me. Not ever, but apparently I was wrong. She shows up on a Thurs, and its good. Until she wants answers I'm not sure I know the question to.

THEN she gets snowed in...for almost a week...if we hadn't been going through the are we or aren't we thing, it would have been a fun visit. And lots of times during the visit we had fun, but it was strung with tension.

I don't think I'm ready for what she wants. She loves like she has no other purpose, and I don't. Sometimes its a bit overwhelming...like how can I ever measure up to that. How can I ever complete another person if I don't breathe for them?

Oh well, it is what it is, and time will tell. Moving on from my emotional dilemma, I got a new tattoo!!!!

That's right! #2! It is beautiful! And I love it. Click here to see it. :)

It says Alea Iacta Est. The die is cast, a quote from Caesar. The reason I got this one is because I interpret it as something like there is no going back. This is it, this moment, this second, it is what it is, and you can't take it back.

In other news, I was watching Pirates of the Carribean 2 the other day and Bootstrap Bill said, "the die is cast." I squealed...

:)

So that's my life lately. Work, slight awkwardness with the ex, a new tattoo, oh, and maybe a promotion at work! :) But its still being talked about by the Store Manager and the District Manager, so we'll see. :)

I am happy...

write_in_red — Wed, 12 Jan 2011 06:56:46 GMT

I am happy to announce that I am now the proud owner of Christian Kane's c.d., House Rules. :)

Yay!

It is being imported into Itunes as I type!

;)

Best thing ever about it? I bought it at my store, got an employee discount, and new music. :) yay!!!!!

I'm off to listen to my new c.d ;)

Ohh...maybe I should read some Leverage fanfiction...never done that before. Oh, but his voice...lol. ;)

p.s. I'm curious to see what the Sammy mood theme is for happy...hmm?

So first laptop crisis has been averted...

write_in_red — Fri, 07 Jan 2011 08:12:30 GMT

The first crisis of the new laptop has been averted...

It's true, I've only had my new baby in my possession for almost 12 hours...most of those where I was unfortunately detained in hell... *cough*read work*cough*

And I have lived through my first problem. Nothing google and some determination couldn't handle.

I was on my journal page, and I apparently had two fingers on the mouse pad at the same time... While this might have not been an issue for my old laptop, apparently, it is for this one. My mouse pad has the "pinch zoom" enabled. So I can "pinch in" or "pinch out" and my screen will adjust to the size I want...

I am familiar with the technology, its used on my Iphone, and it'swholly unnecessary on my laptop...hell, I only use it on my phone when I play Angry Birds...lol.

So there ya go, crisis averted. Yay.

Now, I'm off to bed, because I have to be at work in *checks watch* 5 & 1/2 hours...fml. But its ok...know why? BECAUSE when I get off I'm gonna come home and play on my new computer for hours and I am being completely truthful!!!

ha ha ha

:)

p.s. I was slightly sad for a moment just now...I wanted to have *smug* as my mood, but it's not an option. Sad days. So, satisfied it is! :)

AHHHH!!!! Today is the BEST day EVER!!!

write_in_red — Fri, 07 Jan 2011 02:06:52 GMT

Let there be rejoicing! For I now have a shiny new laptop...and it is wonderful! :)

So fast, so pretty, so wonderful!

I love it.

It has 4gb of ram, upgradeable to 8! A 500gb hard drive! And the new Intel I3 processor!!!!

SOOOO Amazing!

*sigh*

My life is now complete...hmm

And the background of my new baby? Nothing less than two hot Texans. :)

HMM hmm!

BEST DAY EVER!!!

Life in Oklahoma 1.4

write_in_red — Tue, 04 Jan 2011 08:29:19 GMT

So Christmas has come and gone. :) It was pretty anti-climatic this year. We didn't have to pack up all of our stuff and drive for hours. LoL. So that was nice, I think that is what made it seem almost like Christmas wasn't quite here till Christmas Eve.

Not to mention that working six days a week from middle of November to New Year's was not my favorite thing. I hate the holiday season while I work in retail. It was a nightmare. Boo. I am so glad that the crazy shoppers and attitudes are days from being gone! Yay! :)

I closed the store Christmas Eve, but it got better after I got home. T and I sat up with the family for a while, and then when they all went off to bed, we had our customary drink. We each had a pint of Smirnoff Ice and drank to the year and watch tv. :) Good times. LoL. :) We watched the season finale for Dawson's Creek at T's insistence...it was interesting and as angst filled as I remember the first season being when it aired back in the day.

Christmas Day was ok. We opened presents and then some of my family left. I took a nap till lunch was ready and then we all sat at the table. Wasn't that fun? I'm so glad we only have to do that twice a year. I don't think I could live through more than once at Thanksgiving and one more at Christmas. The family drama is way too much, it almost came to figurative blows...if glares could kill people, half of us would be dead. omg.

I had to open the day after Christmas so that was a very short break. But now that the store has settled down with the holiday rush over I think I am going to start having two days off a week again. Hallelujah. I need the break. :)

Here is the long awaited tattoo, at least long awaited by tattoo_kink.

Also I was feeling crafty awhile ago, and I made a hat! So here is the picture of me and my hat! My first one, and I think it turned out pretty cute if I do say so myself. :)

Anyway, that's the update and all the fun stuff that has been happening in my life.

Oh and in case anyone needs a code for dreamwidth, I now have two to share. :)

The Great Layout Debacle

write_in_red — Sat, 18 Dec 2010 09:52:18 GMT

I always have these grand plans of what I am going to do for my layout...I do. And they are gorgeous in my head.

I took the stylesheet for this layout from sunrisetr here on DW. It was a lovely layout. But I really wanted a winter header. And since I had just fallen in love with the animated banner that lusaly just posted, I was not to be swayed.

So I got it in my head that I could adjust the layout to have a banner and change the color scheme to fit what I wanted...

Why can't I just be satisfied with what I have? huh? Beats me...

To begin I save the banner and upload it so I can put it on my page. Yea. I managed to find the right bit of code and its done...except its only about a 1/4 of an inch big... I go change the pixels till I find a happy medium, but now its repeating...grr...ok. I'll come back to that...

But now I want the colors to go with the banner. Color chart here I come. I pick out a pretty blue and a ghostwhite color and go to town changing colors in the code...one at a time and refreshing a separate tab to see what it changed...lol. It was ridiculous.

I've made some headway, but I can't finish the rest of it, because I made myself promise that I would go to bed at 4 a.m. I have to be at the store at 8, or I would continue on my way. I may only get 3 hours sleep, which is sadly par for the course, but I like what I did so far.

Go me.

Edited: Now my LJ has the same festive header. :) Yay!

So I have Given In...

write_in_red — Sat, 18 Dec 2010 07:00:51 GMT

I heard about the change in the LJ TOS so, as a back up I got a dreamwidth account to save all my ramblings.

*sigh*

The Apocalypse is upon us...