discouraged...
things aren't going very well right now. i recently (try three days ago) came to the conclusion that i have no desire to either 1) major in biology or 2) become a doctor, which was the plan for my college career. with a month left before the beginning of my freshman year, i realized i want to major in english. no big deal, i'll just email the school and see if i can get it changed. piece of cake.
except not.
like most people, i was too mediocre a student in high school to get enough scholarships to pay my full college tuition. meaning my mom's gotta pay ~8k for my college this year. given that, she feels she has license to have a say in what i study. which is fair enough. except for the fact that she has no care or consideration for what i want, nor does she have reasonable expectations for where i should be as an eighteen year old student.
basically, i wanna major in a liberal arts degree, the EVUL BEAST english bachelor of arts that everyone either dreads or detests. and she's not having it. i brought my proposal, a reasonable one, i might add, with tentative plans, career options, marketable skills, and a plan to minor in something more appealing to employers. but she wouldn't even consider it. she gave me a long lecture about cost of living and being able to support a family (which she didn't ask whether or not i want. spoiler alert: i don't) and levels of fulfillment of WOC in the positions i'm planning to apply for. she expects me to have a one year, five year, ten year, and twenty-five year plan when i don't even know what i wanna do next week. like, dafuq is the deal with these expectations?????
anyway, i'm ranty and pissy and idek if anyone will read this or if any of that will even make sense to anyone who comes across it but whatever, this is sorta therapeutic. maybe if things change we'll get a happy update. here's to hoping
except not.
like most people, i was too mediocre a student in high school to get enough scholarships to pay my full college tuition. meaning my mom's gotta pay ~8k for my college this year. given that, she feels she has license to have a say in what i study. which is fair enough. except for the fact that she has no care or consideration for what i want, nor does she have reasonable expectations for where i should be as an eighteen year old student.
basically, i wanna major in a liberal arts degree, the EVUL BEAST english bachelor of arts that everyone either dreads or detests. and she's not having it. i brought my proposal, a reasonable one, i might add, with tentative plans, career options, marketable skills, and a plan to minor in something more appealing to employers. but she wouldn't even consider it. she gave me a long lecture about cost of living and being able to support a family (which she didn't ask whether or not i want. spoiler alert: i don't) and levels of fulfillment of WOC in the positions i'm planning to apply for. she expects me to have a one year, five year, ten year, and twenty-five year plan when i don't even know what i wanna do next week. like, dafuq is the deal with these expectations?????
anyway, i'm ranty and pissy and idek if anyone will read this or if any of that will even make sense to anyone who comes across it but whatever, this is sorta therapeutic. maybe if things change we'll get a happy update. here's to hoping