The Geek in The Pink

In Bloom

2011-02-03T18:30:23Z

In Bloom

Prologue

Spring.

Its the the time of year where everything comes full circle.

What was once dead has been rejuvenated, reborn and new.

The cold dreary days gives way to lighter, happier times.

Flowers bloom and shots of colour stab the heart of the soulless winter months, leaving a world reawakening to its senses.

You were my spring. Of that I was sure.

When you came into my life, everything else came into focus. Everything seemed brighter. I was free and in love.

Completely in love with a man.

Who didn't know I existed.

I was a ghost to you, you and your friends.

I wanted you to see me, to see me, to see who I was.

You never did. Not until you found me.

Now I was watching a man wilt before my eyes.

Protruding cheekbones and hollow eyes stood out from your thin face.

The shine had worn off, all that remained was a dull tired man.

You hadn't slept in a while. I could tell.

Only embers of happiness remained.

That’s the odd thing about spring.

Once you adjust to the fresh start it brings, it becomes just like any other season that bleeds into the other. The only real thing that marks seasons is time.

That’s what I had become.

Nothing.

Nothing that bleeds into time and seasons...God knows I've seen a few now.

So have you.

And yet we always meet at the same time, at the same place every year.

Funny thing that.

I watch you.

You put down the same flowers every year in the same place. Plain white lilies with yellow chrysanthemums, the colours of death and spring combined. I could predict the message you would put in the card in your chicken scratch handwriting. It was always the same thing.

“I'm sorry -D”

Whenever I read that I could always feel my heart break and the threat of tears. I knew your simple, understated nature was always sincere. I could see it and I believed you.

I just wish I could forgive you.

Unforgivable (3/???)

2010-04-28T00:36:16Z

Unforgivable.
Pairing: Belldom
Rating: PG13 ish…May change to a higher rating.
Genre: Horror/Angst
Summary: Dom is gone and Matt’s on a mission to find him, but the twists and turns that are found along the way look set to change life as they know it forever.
Disclaimer: Don’t own a thing, don’t claim to. This is just fiction
Notes: Larger update :) sorry if there's errors...tried to filter them out but if I missed some then I'll be sure to correct it as soon as its spotted! lol FYI-It was either Duran Duran or Spandu Ballet lol! *shrugs*

3.
The world is more 1984 then we like to believe.
I mean face facts. No-one is truly individual-the media sees to that and fashion in particular has a way of recycling trends, everyone is watched and is watching alike on a regular basis thanks to the internet and CCTV and suspicious things have a way of happening without any real explanation-like people disappearing off the face of the earth for no apparent reason. Like Dom.
Actually, perhaps the world is more like The Prisoner; perhaps Dom’s stuck in a surreal place like The Village, is now a number and can’t get far thanks to a raving second in command and a version of the Rover.
I keep that image in my head, Dom bouncing about in a large plastic ball, enjoying himself like he’s on The Gladiators or something. I suppress a giggle as I set off in my car for the last place I knew where Dom was-London.
I still have the text he sent me that morning.
Dated 26th March 2010 at 10 o’ Clock.
He’d gone up to London from Teignmouth by train for a day trip- Shopping.
Can’t remember for what now I think about it…but he’d defiantly went to London for something.
He was more than likely shopping for clothes.
I remember he got up annoyingly early that day just to get the train. Everytime I think about that day I can’t help but roll my eyes a little at the fact he’d got up at 5am that day to go shopping. In London.
Why the hell he couldn’t go shopping anywhere nearer I’d never now. Bristol, Exeter…Hell I'll bet even Cardiff’s nearer than bloody London!
So typical.So typical Dom.
The text was moaning about the length of the trip, the fact that the train smelt funny and had rubbish everywhere, how Morgan was bugging him stupid, how the seats were uncomfortable and that ticket prices were too high…Well they would be if you’re going from Teignmouth to London...still it was just all about normal silly things really when I think about it.
Morgan.
I haven’t seen him since Dom had disappeared.
Odd...
A cold sense of dread enters the pit of my stomach as I try not to think about what could have happened. Murder perhaps? At Morgan’s hands?
Nah...
And yet...
I can't stop myself as I automatically head for the next junction and turn around back into Teignmouth.
To Morgan’s.
To see what he knows
I have to see him.
***
I know Morgan’s place like the back of my hand.
At one point I used to live there along with Dom before we decided to get our own place in Teignmouth...
I also know exactly where he leaves the front door key when he's out...Like now.
I look for it now.He’s not here.He's actually not here...Bastard.
I step into the old familiar surroundings and find a small smile cross my lips despite myself.
I look around the living room...the greying whitewash walls, the dark blue carpet and the battered brown sofa… not much had changed since I’d last been here.
Same old place, same old shit...
The only thing that really had changed was the photographs on the mantelpiece- he’s changed them from old teenage photos to the one taken when we were all out in a bar one night in Mexico.
Naturally, we were all wasted when the photo was taken.
I can’t honestly say I remember when the photo was taken…
Still… me and Dom were goofing off, wearing large novelty sombreros, mine was red and his was blue.
In the picture we’re holding a bottle of tequila and a taco between us, shit eating grins plastered on both our sunburnt pink faces while both our eyes are light up like Christmas trees.
Morgan, Tom and Chris are all standing next to us on our left…with highly amused grins on their faces in the photo-like sensible people they didn't dress up like novelty Mexicans in the bar nor did they shout out "TEQUILA" all the time in a slightly dodgy racist accent...Nor did they sing Duran Duran's Rio drunkenly at the top of their voices as they stumbled back to the hotel...That was Dom I swear... Although Chris did get attack by some permanent marker pens...the moustache and cock on his face took him a while to scrub off in the morning when he eventually woke up...
All in all...It was a really good night from what I remember...
I laugh to myself, humming Girls on Film as I carry on looking around the house.
Its as I walk into the spare room I notice something odd.
Dom’s flannel shirt is there. And it’s covered in blood.
As the realisation slowly sinks in my mind...downstairs the door opens.

Unforgivable (2/???)

2010-04-26T12:17:42Z

Writer's Block: Dinner's on me

2010-04-25T13:00:25Z

Pub Lunch aka Roast Dinner with Liquid Refreshment at the local! haha...If they didn't like the meal...in all fairness it probably wouldn't matter as they could get drunk either way! haha

Writer's Block: Gone with the wind

2010-04-17T01:44:44Z

The Radio, The Newspapers and CDs ...simply because technology is developing so fast the old school methods of doing things is just bound to become obsolete!

*had to do this I know the person who submitted this question haha...Work & sleep avoidance is going well so far!*

...

2010-04-17T01:40:43Z

I suck at keeping up with technology I really do *giggle* I mean if it's not the convenience of Twitter or the addiction of Facebook then I have a real hard time paying attention to the likes of Blogger, Livejournal or DailyBooth and the like... I'd like to say its because I have a life and I'm really manically busy all the time. That would only be true some of the time. The main reason as to why I don't journal and take pictures of me at dodgy angles all the time? Simply cannot be bothered haha!
So when I am bothered to do things like this... it's a bit of a mind fuck to think of what I should write... 0.o I mean should I write what I've done in the gaps since I last updated? OR should I ramble on like a pathetic fool?
Or should I just end the typing right here? right now?
Decisions.
xx
P.S I've decided to let my feral ramblings out on the LJ world...also I've changed my layout temporarily to celebrate! Fun times to be had by all at the tea party! *anything to avoid work really*

Unforgivable. (1/???)

2010-04-13T20:50:53Z

Unforgivable.
Pairing: Belldom
Rating: PG13 ish…May change to a higher rating.
Genre: Horror/Angst
Summary: Dom is gone and Matt’s on a mission to find him, but the twists and turns that are found along the way look set to change life as they know it forever.
Disclaimer: Don’t own a thing, don’t claim to. This is just fiction [=

1.
It always starts the same.
I am standing on a block of melting ice. The weather is cold. Almost arctic.
I am standing on the ice barefoot, naked and shivering.
I have been crying. I never know what about.
Underneath the ice are crackling flames and hard granite rock.
If I jump I will die. If I stay on the ice I still die. Just less painfully, I suppose. I only have one release from the cold unforgiving ice and the torturous flames.
In one of my hands is a gun and in the other is a bullet.
I always make the same choice. I do nothing.
Instead, I stand and I wait for an end. This seldom comes quickly.
Nevertheless, the end comes eventually; I brace myself when I know the ice is going to cave in. But it never truly does because before I know it, I am quickly plunged feet first into deep ice blue water.
And I always come across the same thing when I stop falling down into the water.
I always come across a body.
A body I know well.
Its burned beyond recognition, melting and eroding away in the water.
The skin is peeling off the body and I spy bone, blood, muscle and blistered tanned flesh.
It isn’t this that causes me to wake up the same way I always do. It’s the fact that this when I look into the face of this body of this person... I see nothing. I don’t see his sharp, shining crystal grey-blue eyes. I don’t see his blonde hair. I don’t even see his smile or his handsome face. It’s simply not there. Numb from shock I have cut out the realisation that I know him from my mind and all I see is nothing but a tortured body and a scarred face sinking down in the water. His styled, fashionable hair is messily waving about in the water, it sometimes hides his lopsided tanned face and the horror of there being no eyes.
They have been cut out. He’s soulless. I don’t want to look into them but I can’t help myself to look at not only his lack of eyes but his face.
Dried blood is crusted over where his eyes should be. His mouth is rigid and stretched open into an unnaturally wide grin. No doubt his jaw is somewhat broken. There’s no teeth only raw stubby pink flesh where they should be. Water and air bubbles gush out of the holes in his body as I scramble across to touch him, to try and help. To confirm my worst fears. But I know its of no use. I already know that the body is dead and I panic. I never realise until its too late that he’s weighted down and there’s nothing I can do to.
Furiously in my anxiousness I try pulling him up by swimming up out of the water and into the light. As the body sinks further and further down. My world as I know it is caving in around me, I look at what’s in my hands and I know what I should do.
It is at this point I always wake up in a cold sweat, shaking and in a hurry to get out of my protective covers and my temporary shelter that is my bed.
It is within fraction of a second from awaking, between the reflection of a dream and the growing grasp of a sense of reality that I wake into the real nightmare.
The love of my life, my best and longest friend and the drummer of this band is missing.
I don’t know whether he’s alive or dead, taking the piss or in serious trouble. I miss him. I feel like a fragile piece of glass with out him by my side.
I wish his warm body was lying beside me. I wish I could hear his laugh one more time, to see his eyes light up in pure joy at me.
I wish I could hear him moan in pleasure and for me to exist side by side in pure bliss, exhausted and worked into a different kind of sweat in bed.
I have a serious carnal need to both jump his bones for his beauty and punch him in the face hurting me like this.
I want to crumble into his arms half laughing at him, half crying. I want and need him so badly.
My strongest desire and wish above it all is for him to just hold me in his long muscular arms and say that everything is okay. That everything’s fine. He just popped to the shops while I was sleeping. That’s all. Silly me for getting so worked up over nothing.
I don’t really want to think about the possibility that he’s doing this on purpose to hurt me. But that’s a safer option then the ever niggling suspicion that this is serious and he’s in real danger. I mean if this was on purpose and orchestrated by him, then at least he is okay. Fucked up in the head. But not in any real actual harm.
He’s not that organised though. He could never be arsed to do a simple prank on April fools let alone this…and he loves me. He loves me and will never intentionally hurt me. I bet my life on it…
This means…
I need to wake up soon.
I mean really wake up and face facts.
Dom is missing. My Dom is missing. It’s a fact that continually swirls around my head like a constant merry-go-round. He’s been missing for weeks. Muse is officially over until Chris and I find our drummer, our childhood friend and my boyfriend.
Kidnap is the only real possible option. I really just need to find him for my own piece of mind. For my sanity. For love. For him.
Dead or alive.

Writer's Block: You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch!

2009-12-22T18:14:25Z

I always look forward to watching Dr Who Christmas Specials & Eastenders! As well as Only Fools and Horses & Blackadder repeats <3 Never get sick of watching them =]. As for movies I love watching A Nightmare Before Christmas over and over again =] NEVER get sick of that film! Though we always watch Wizard of Oz too! <3