A writer's hideout

Sooooo

2014-02-09T16:29:45Z

So some dude who read Burning for You merged with Ganon and Dark Link dressed up as a bunny to sell me stuff while Zelda's dark twin waxed love poetry to her and in the end Link shot Ganon in the back after another ping-pong match.

Yeah, that's about it.

Nintendo, stop overthinking things, this was sweeeeeet.

Would you kindly...

2014-02-08T11:03:16Z

Right, so... random shout for a little aid here. And it's more than a little stupid of me, but I just feel it's wrong for me to do it myself. I'm a Swede. We don't do self-recommendations. (Unless it's about the Eurovision XD)

Somebody named Jesajew was made of win and awesome and win a while back and listed Introspective Hero on the TVTropes fanfic recommendation page. However the description says it's "A Dead Fic, unfortunately, but still very worth reading", which was true until very recently. I've been updating it almost weekly since late December and I'm hellbent on finishing it (six and a half years later, whoo). So a little mention that it's risen from its grave would be appropriate.

... I said I was being stupid about something, didn't I?

Appropriate avatar is appropriate

2014-02-06T17:07:34Z

... So. Zelda: A Link Between Worlds?

This Yuga dude. Obsessed with beauty? Wants to resurrect "He who will help me attain perfect beauty"? (or something like that, bite me).

Are we talking about the same dude here, Yuga? Have you SEEN Ganon?

Oh wait, my bad. He IS, after all, "the very pylon streaking across loveliness' polychromatic sky".

I am amused. And a nerd. A nerd for horrible, horrible things.

Hmmm...

2014-02-01T16:21:59Z

After playing Sly Cooper: Thieves in Time, I have two questions:

1. Sequel plz? Yeah I know about that movie that may or may not be underway. But I'd rather play a game :D Even though the setup at the end might be better for a movie, but that still demands a lotta backstory.
2. Where was Clockwerk in all this? You have time travel and not a peep about the ancient enemy the ancestors have fought for millenia?

Also, about the big twist in chapter four? I DISAPPROVE MOST MIGHTILY :< *sniffle*

They mock me

2014-01-18T17:07:55Z

Titles.

I hate thinking up titles for stories. I also hate thinking up names for new characters, but titles are worse because supposedly they should mean something.

I have found a Sig/Jak fic that I tried to write for Cackling Skerries back in the day and I think I can do it now (minus the smut because ohgodIcan't) because I miss Skerries :< (THERE ARE SO MANY SUES OH GOD), and for the heck of it.

A title for this sucker shouldn't be that hard because all of my Sig-centric fics are titled "Just a..." something, but in this case all that comes to mind is "Just a challenging mission", which comes a little too close to That One Fic's (<3) title.

Just for the record I'm not overreaching and starting a whole bunch of fics at once and leaving them unfinished ;) That one I blabbed on about in the last entry is finished and I'm just holding off posting the rest of it for a few days to let people "enjoy" the cliffhanger.

Because I'm such a nice gal like that ^____^

bounces

2014-01-11T15:09:54Z

Ya know, coming back to the JnD fandom, even if it's just to clean up old stuff, might be the best thing that happened to my nerdiness in a long time. I haven't felt this excited and fangirly in far, faaar too long.

And now, let's get that "Still gonna shoot you" picture story written, shall we?

It includes Daxter yelling "No! Jak-- Jak, sit! Bad Jak!"

But mostly it includes Jak and Erol having to fight metal heads together :D

... eh, at which point in the game does this happen, again? *sighs and goes to look at FAQ, because I can play through Jak 3 for references, but if I try to do that with Jak 2 I'll never get this sucker done*

MIND BREAK

2014-01-09T19:01:59Z

RUM TUM TUGGER SINGING AC DC FROM STARLIGHT EXPRESS OH MY GOD MY HEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAD

Uwehehehehe

2014-01-04T12:56:57Z

Writing about people going batshit bonkers is a lot more fun than it should be.

I REGRET NOOOOOTHING :D

pinches bridge of nose

2013-12-27T20:04:06Z

"Jaxter"?

Really.

Didn't we all silently agree that name-smushing for pairings is dumb?

No? Did I miss that memo?

Uuuuugh.

Oh, and "good" to see that little has changed in the JnD fanfic section at ff.net. Why am I going back in, again?

Well, on the bright side, all I need is two introspections and HALLELUJAH THERE'LL BE A NEW CHAPTER OMGOMGOMG *flails*

Words words words

2013-12-25T13:20:17Z

Oi! Jak fandom, you still around here?

Was Erol ever called "Haven's finest" somewhere in game or fandom, or did I make that up myself? I think I might have, but I want to know for sure so I don't make myself look like a moron.

>_>

I may or may not be trying to bring Introspective Hero back to life. No promises though, these guys and I haven't been on speaking terms in years.

Nope nope nope nope nope nope nope

2013-12-08T09:01:55Z

Well, I did expect to see dear little Mr Mistoffelees paired with everything that moves in that musical. 'Cause he's the bishiest of them all.

I did NOT expect the Macavity mpreg.

DAMN YOU INTERNET

Come again?

2013-08-31T15:11:33Z

What do you mean, Kefka/Kuja is a popular crack!pairing?

*looks at DeviantArt*

Oh my.

Delivered by dove

2013-08-27T19:47:37Z

To: Avatar of the Pale Tree
From: Seelandra
Subject: About Faolain, Scarlet Briar and some other of my siblings

Dear mommeh,
WHY YOU GROW SO MANY PSYCHOS?!
Love,
Your doting daughter

PS. I killed 172 dredge today! It's a new record :D

Oooooh shiiiny...

2013-08-02T09:49:11Z

I find that the amount of freakin' AWESOME Legend of Zelda fanart is mindblowing.

And all the attention Dark Link gets despite only showing up like once, with no dialogue, is hilarious.

The fact that there exists at least one "Female Sheik Support group" on dA, showing that there is STILL a need for such... is however depressing. Yes, I get you want to have Link in a realationship with a prettyboy, but there's really nothing to discuss here. Sheik IS Zelda, end of story what the hell...
Ghirahim is creepy and full of unabashed homoerotic tension aimed at Link, why not just move on to him instead? Or is he just too swishy with his heart full of rainbows?

Ho yay indeed

2012-07-19T19:59:54Z

You know, that scene in Castlevania: Curse of Darkness (just search for "Trevor and Isaac" on Youtube along with the game name) always made me laugh harder than I should. There might be two scenes with them, but I mean the one with the dagger in the back.

It's a mediocre game with a mindblowingly boring final level - Dracula's castle is now one corridor and one room copypasted about twenty times, but Isaac is just delightfully campy (and evil gay) in every scene he's in.

And then somebody pointed out that he's probably possessed by Dracula in that scene where he stabs and kisses Trevor Belmont.

On my WORD, Lord Tepes.

Level 30...

2012-07-17T07:15:08Z

... so, do I get a mount for this achievement? I hope not. My apartment isn't that big.

My twenties were definitely worlds better than my teens. That bodes well for the future. Bring it on, thirties! *fist pump*

Okay, back to preparing birthday lunch. I'm not doing anything big, just having the 'rents, gran and sis and her hubby over :) And I get a dishwasher and a new kitchen stove delivered later today. EEEEEEEEE :D

How time turns...

2012-07-07T09:07:11Z

So the pitch for Of Orcs and Men is:

Your homeland is being invaded by evil creatures murdering and enslaving your people and your allies. Your quest is to save your people from the invaders.

And you're not playing on the "Men" side of the title.

YEEHAAAAW!

Waaaay too splattery for me by the looks of it, but I love the idea.

Oi...

2012-07-01T15:08:56Z

You'd think that when your weekly feel-good magazine for women recommends a book, it would be something like and easy to digest, maybe humoristic and with a happy ending. I had the hankering for just something to read and for some reason that recommendation and brief review caught my eye so I went and got the book from the library. It stars a seventeen-year-old girl in Victorian England.

Crazy Bible-quoting mother who turns out to be an aunt while the real mother suffers in silence!

Thought-to-be-dead-(not)-dad who comes back to get his wife to come help him with his cult in America!

Anti-semitism!

Accidental incest!

Let's throw in some child murder too!

And why not some pedophilia while we're at it?! (Just as rambles by the nutsy butler who did it (yes really), thank you very much)

Holy HELL, Allers, why didn't you warn me? I had flashbacks to my literature studies.

Riiiight

2012-06-25T14:35:13Z

Sooo... two and a half month absence is not due to falling off the planet but rather not having a computer/internet.

Short version:

My computer is possessed by an undead pirate demon and I only hope it's not Ezechiel Pregzt. That would suck.

Long version:

...

...

... Too long and ridiculous for me to bother with right now. I've got videos to watch, webcomics to read, and online drama to angst over.

BUT I HAVE MY COMP AND INTERNET BACK YAAAY!

... did something happen with the Jak fandom? Because I've got a buttload of reviews for my old fics (from different people) since I've been gone.

The things you find out about yourself

2012-04-16T09:53:33Z

I was feeling a bit nostalgic (probably due to the upcoming move) so I did something I normally never do and went back to check on some several-years-old fanfics of mine. While I keep all my old shames on my ff.net account, I don't like reading them. Well, I didn't go that far back...

Anyway.

From author's note on Not Another Bloody Conspiracy!, which is a parody of FF8 fanfiction: "Thanks a lot for the reviews, and fear not, this shall continue for a good while! And I always finish what I start, so don't worry about being left hanging."

Ahaha... ha... ha...

>_>

I am a filthy filthy liar :(

Oddsies and endsies

2012-04-15T09:08:50Z

Right sooo... moving out to a bigger apartment next week. Whee! Won't have internet for a while, don't know how long. Less whee!

I'm really glad I don't have so much stuff, because I want this done quickly. It'll take a while longer next time I move, I assume, since I'll have much more storage space to stupidly fill up, but we'll cross that bridge when we get to it.
(I'll finally be able to buy new clothes because I'll have somewhere to put them now!)

I have the week off and today and tomorrow I prepare as much as I can.

In between that I'm still playing Harvest Moon: Grand Bazaar which does the core gameplay as fine as ever with the added excitement of selling your own goods, but oh the social part. I've never been that fond of the interaction with the villagers, especially since they're seldom that interesting. The Rune Factory series is vastly superior here, at least the two games I've played of it. Anyway, the characters in Grand Bazaar is on par with the ones in the very first Harvest Moon - they have an extremely limited amount of dialogue which does change depending on which screen/area you talk to them on (and there are only five areas plus their houses), and a couple of different lines on festivals. I assumed there would be more when you leveled up their heart points but so far that doesn't seem to happen.

It's really too bad. I gave up socializing completely and just focus on the farming and selling aspect because the other half of the game is so, soooo lazily done. It's really sad because they can do so much better than this.

Hookay, guess I can't put off doing the dishes anymore. But I shall soon have a dishwasher, yaaaay!

And when I do the dishes I'll muck up dad's homemade gravlax for lunch by cooking it, because the more I eat that stuff, the more I realize I don't like it much.

Aliens

2012-03-23T17:25:25Z

Aliens. Aliens.

ALIENS.

Oh my head. I don't know whether to be weeping or laughing hysterically. Better do the latter to keep from doing the former.

But oh, Doug Walker, how I love thee.

Riiiight, whatever you say...

2012-02-26T14:00:38Z

I get a weekly magazine with recepies, various articles and whatnot. It's the kind usually read by older people than I, but I find it a nice diversion. The articles are mainly about nice things, for a change, even if there're sad life stories too sometimes.

I can't help but check out the novella serials they publish in the magazine as well, though I seldom if ever actually read them. It's my snarker side, because they're around Harlequin Romance quality.

For the last one, I couldn't get further than the character list before I was laughing hysterically.

"*Heroine name*: The daughter of an English count and a princess of India"

And the plot involves action-girl princess lady and her smuggler-trying-to-come-clean-and-regain-his-family's-lost-county (of course) hero trying to stop a plot by Napoleon to kidnap a princess of England and blow up the rest of the royal family.

... TRY A LITTLE HARDER, YOU CAN DOOO EEET! I think you haven't QUITE broken everyone's suspension of disbelief yet!

Ooooorigins chaaaange

2012-02-03T20:37:27Z

I'm distracted and tipsy (something I usually isn't aside from on New Years, but this is a writing experiment, yo. FOR SCIENCE!), so here's some more of that original thingy. Here's part one.

This happens much later in the story than that first part.

The air was heavy and damp, smelling of rust and mold. Lillian wished she could have held her hand to her face to filter each strained breath through, but being chained up made that impossible. She could get by, though. Others had it worse – Collins’ strained breath rattled through the dimly lit air, almost every inhale broken by a series of coughs. He had not been well before they were captured and this chilly, unhealthy air was worsening his condition at a frightening rate.

And then again, Lillian knew that he wouldn’t die like this. A Damned man wouldn’t be so lucky.

She shook her great head to clear it, rattling the chains holding her against the wall and sending dozens of thick black braids bouncing about her shoulders. A slight movement from the cell across caught her eyes and she squinted that way. The little torch light and flickering shadows made it difficult for even her eyesight to make anything out, but then a thin leg stretched out of the gloom and the foot at the end of it waved.

Relaxing slightly, Lillian rattled her chains in response, and the leg withdrew. Collins just kept coughing in his own cell, but the slight pause in his strained breathing indicated that he too had caught the signals. One does have to improvise when in a situation where speech may give you away and you’re out of sight for sign language.

Time to start a distraction, since Tako had managed to get hold of one of his dirks.

“How’re you holding up, Collins?” Lillian called. She heard a slight, metallic rasping sound between her own words, but it was so low that what she said should be enough to cover it from anybody with less keen hearing.

The scrape silenced as soon as she stopped talking. She could imagine Tako standing there with the tip of his tongue sticking out and hands twisted painfully to work on the chain’s lock.

Collins’ hoarse breathing alone was almost enough to give Tako more noise cover.

“My chest’s burning,” Collins rasped, the short sentence cut in half by another coughing fit.

“Should’ve let us turn around, stupid pinkie,” Lillian snarled. Obviously Collins would not be able to offer much talking, so she had to fill up the silence. “Didn’t think you were this stupid. Useless humans and your useless pride!”

“Go easy on him,” Tako said from the shadows, “you’re no less boar headed yourself.”

Even though she knew it was an act, a nerve twitched on Lillian’s dark, hairy forehead.

“What was that?” she snarled.

“Look, lady, I’m not the one who pushed for us to head out even if he was hacking up a lung.”

“Liar!”

It was a lie, but that was not the point. Lillian strained against her chains to create even more distracting noise. That was all she managed to do, of course. They were thick enough to hold a small dragon.

“Anyway, not like we stand and fall with him!” she snarled.

“No, but it helps if there are three of us instead of two––” Tako fell silent suddenly, stilling his dirk.

Lillian snapped her mouth shut, eyes narrowing. Though he kept coughing and heaving, Collins must be aware of it as well. Something was moving down the rough stair.

It cast no shadows on the walls because it moved too close to the ground itself, melting gracefully down each step. It looked like a dark root growing from the floor above, but Lillian had seen their capturer’s pet. She instantly recognized it, and her skin crawled.

The intruder reached the floor and reared upwards, tasting the air with a grey, split tongue before slithering forwards. Lillian held her breath. Normally snakes did not scare her at all, but also normally she was not chained up when a huge one was nearby. However, it just passed by her cell and moved onwards.

Its movements made a low, whispering sound of pebbles brushed over the floor, but only briefly. Leaning forwards as far as she could, she saw it swaying back and forth in front of the bars of Collins’ cell. He coughed again. From the slightly less muffled sound and the clink of chains, Lillian could tell that he tried to straighten up.

“Oh, but you are in trouble.”

The voice sounded like dry, dead leaves rustling. It did not belong to any of the prisoners. Lillian tensed, clenching her jaw harder. Figured it wasn’t a normal snake.

There was no reply from inside Collins’ cell.

Taking in a deep breath, Lillian forced herself to calm down. This was no time to get worked up. Stay focused. Plan. If the snake was more than an animal, so much better – maybe it could be reasoned with. Magical beasts did tend to have little favor for evil masters, as they were often enslaved in order to work for anybody.

The question was just what kind of magical animal it was. That its scales were brown and black instead of only pitch black was a good sign. It was probably not pure evil, then.

“Who did that to you?” the snake whispered. “You don’t look foolish enough to sell yourself.”

Collins said nothing, only wheezed in hoarse breaths.

“What’s it to ya?” Lillian said, her neck aching from the strain as she stretched it further to see. When the snake ignored her, she added in a sharper voice, “Oi! I’m talking to you, and he ain’t.”

The erect part of the long body turned in a half circle to let the snake look at Lillian. A thrill ran down her massive spine. It did not feel like fear, and that made her lips unconsciously draw back from her teeth and tusks.

“You’re very handsome, but he’s much more interesting,” the snake said. It turned back while Lillian gaped at it. “I’ve never seen a Damned before.” It seemed to find this amusing, as a hissing laugh followed. “Ironic, yes… yes, it is.”

A suspicion reared its ugly head inside Lillian’s mind, that it was not a snake at all. Her mouth formed a string of silent swear words.

Then she snarled a series of loud ones when the snake turned its head sideways and slipped in between the bars of Collins’ cell, gliding into the shadows with only the dry murmur of its large body against the ground.

“Hey! Hey! He’s sick and tied up, give ‘im a chance to defend himself!” she yelled.

There was no reply. In fact, apart from the brush of the snake moving around and the clink of chains, all was silent.

Collins’ breathing no longer rasped.

Holding her breath and with the sound of her own blood rushing through her ears, Lillian strained to see around the corner of the wall to no avail.

There was a short, growling breath suddenly cut off with the soft sound of teeth meeting something that resisted.

The snake howled.

Lillian’s jaw dropped as she stared. From where she was she only caught brief glimpses of the long, dark body twisting around in pain, whipping at the floor and walls of Collins’ cell. It came loose suddenly, drawing backwards with a sharp hiss. Collins growled and spat. A tooth hit the floor with a crisp tink.

Silence.

Finally, the snake curled against the bars, hissing in quick, uneven breaths. It took a moment before Lillian realized it was laughing again. When it made a twisting motion, as if shaking itself, she saw the bleeding half moon where Collins had bitten the snake, just below its head. Crimson poured down the scales, gleaming in the torch light.

“Very good. Very, very good. Yes…” The snake held the final word for a couple of seconds too long.

Lillian’s mouth was dry.

“It’s powerful. Which could it be?” the snake murmured, sounding as if it thought aloud. It swayed back and forth. “You’re good. Who sold you, human?”

Even though he spat again, Collins’ voice sounded thick from the blood in his mouth.

“Why?” he said.

“I am curious. Will it hurt to tell me, hmm?”

“No.” He had to spit more blood. “My father.”

The snake stopped moving. For a few moments it was still as a statue, and Lillian thought for sure it would laugh again. However, instead it suddenly let out a low, slow hiss. The sound was so pleased that the orc shifted uncomfortably.

“I like you.”

Oh hai Rakadra :D

You just don't like me, do you?

2012-02-02T18:26:10Z

You know, I can deal with bad translations, clunky battle and lack of interesting plot if there's some charm to be found somewhere, but in this (on-sale, second hand) game I'm playing now, whenever you level up, the characters freeze in place for a little "Yay!" thing for a second.

But the enemies are still moving.

Game, when you assassinate me with something as stupid as that during a boss-with-minions fight, you forfeit the right to be inside my console.