Look at this fucking hipster

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Fri May 29
“Aaaaahhhhh, I love the beach. I just hate getting sand in my spurs.”
“Aaaaahhhhh, I love the beach. I just hate getting sand in my spurs.”
Thu May 28
“Be honest. If you were a little kid, would you let me touch your privates?”
“Be honest. If you were a little kid, would you let me touch your privates?”
“Ugh, you guys, none of the girls at this party are paying attention to us. I guess you know what that means…TRIPLE KISS TIME!”
“Ugh, you guys, none of the girls at this party are paying attention to us. I guess you know what that means…TRIPLE KISS TIME!”
Wed May 27
“Oh, you want proof I took Honors English in high school? Here, check out this unbelievably pretentious tattoo I got.”
“Oh, you want proof I took Honors English in high school? Here, check out this unbelievably pretentious tattoo I got.”
Tue May 26
“Wow. I really nailed my David Bowie ukulele cover this time. Yeah, I should definitely post it on YouTube immediately. Because it’s so flawless and people will want to see it.”
Mon May 25
“Is this a drug-sniffing dog or a mistakes-sniffing dog? Because, either way, he’s right.”
“Is this a drug-sniffing dog or a mistakes-sniffing dog? Because, either way, he’s right.”
Sun May 24
Look at this fucking Santa connection.
Look at this fucking Santa connection.
Sat May 23
“These adult braces aren’t even on the top ten list of things I should be embarrassed about.”
“These adult braces aren’t even on the top ten list of things I should be embarrassed about.”
Fri May 22
“My goal was to make a bicycle that would somehow be more impractical to ride than a unicycle. I think I succeeded? I’m not sure. What does success feel like? Does it feel like being drunk and high and also riding a ridiculous polygon stilt-bike? Because, if that’s the case, I’ve been feeling really successful lately.”
“My goal was to make a bicycle that would somehow be more impractical to ride than a unicycle. I think I succeeded? I’m not sure. What does success feel like? Does it feel like being drunk and high and also riding a ridiculous polygon stilt-bike? Because, if that’s the case, I’ve been feeling really successful lately.”