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Sarah Millican
@SarahMillican75
Latest special Late Bloomer is on Netflix (not UK & IRE) & Channel4.com (UK & IRE) now. Podcast - Standard Issue Replies ending TSM are by my team.
At home!
linktr.ee/thesarahmillic…
Born January 1
Joined February 2009
3,829
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1.8M
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    Sarah Millican
    @SarahMillican75
    Apr 9
    Reminder that my stand up show is on Netflix around the world. Unless you’re in the UK and Ireland, where you can find it on Channel 4 on Demand. Thanks to everyone who’s watched it so far! Poster photo by Matt Crockett Photo of me and my friends in Times Square by me.
    It’s me and Elmo, King Kong and Goku having a laugh in front of my Times Square billboard. The text on the image says ‘reminder that my show Late Bloomer is on Netflix Worldwide*’ ‘*on channel 4 On Demand in the UK and Ireland’.
    21K
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    Sarah Millican
    @SarahMillican75
    May 29, 2021
    This is what 46 looks. Happy birthday to me. 🥳
    Photo description for anyone who needs it. It’s me! In my garden with greenery behind me. I’m wearing new make up I got for my birthday and my new glasses. My hair is down and doing well for day 3. It’s my birthday and I look happy and isn’t that all you can ask.
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    Sarah Millican
    @SarahMillican75
    Aug 22, 2023
    15 years ago today I won the Newcomer award at the Edinburgh fringe. I won £5K and paid it off my car loan. I had excellent friends with me whose faces I had to check in case I’d heard the announcement wrong. I ran into the street to get signal to ring my then boyfriend now
    It’s a photo of me after I’d just won the award. I look about 12. I’m actually 33. I have shoulder length mousey brown hair, small brown glasses and I’m wearing an orange top. My smile is huge. There’s hustle and bustle around me. It’s pure joy to me. I did good.
    2.7M
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    Sarah Millican
    @SarahMillican75
    Aug 22, 2021
    13 years ago today, I won the Newcomer award at the Edinburgh fringe and paid my car loan off with the prize. This is me just after winning.I was giddy. I’d just met Clive James too.I still remember my speech. I remember it feeling like confirmation that I was on the right track.
    Photo description. It’s me in 2008. I’m wearing a short sleeved orange top and the biggest smile. There are a couple of blokes behind me facing away. This is just after I won the award. I was trying to get out of the building to get some signal to ring everyone (everyone!). I was giddy. I’d just met Clive James too. I still remember my speech. I still remember the friends I had appointed to confirm what had been said in case I heard my name but it hadn’t been said. I still remember the journalists who were disappointed I was using the prize money to pay off debt rather that a down payment on a yacht or something. I remember it feeling like confirmation that I was on the right track.
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    Sarah Millican
    @SarahMillican75
    Dec 14, 2021
    Worried about being alone or lonely this Christmas Day? Then stick with us on Twitter and #JoinIn. I’ll post up more info closer to the day but we’ll all be here to keep you company. Please RT and spread the word.
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    Sarah Millican
    @SarahMillican75
    Dec 8, 2022
    Bought my friend’s daughter a ‘Period Starter Kit’.
    It’s a collection of items laid on a sofa. In the pile are 2 purple packets of fucking jumbo Sanny Ps. That’s not what Always call them but it should be. Also, 3 items of chocolatey goodness: a bag of Smarties ‘to share’ Hahahahaha, a big bar of Aero and a packet of milk chocolate digestive biscuits. And balanced on the top like a fairy on the period tree are some Nurofen because why feel like shit if you don’t have to. Which should be Nurofen’s tagline.
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    Sarah Millican
    @SarahMillican75
    May 29, 2024
    This is what 49 looks like. (Happy Birthday to me)
    It’s me, in the garden, sitting in a garden seat with ivy growing up the back. My hair was done yesterday so has a sweaty underside that’s hidden. I have make up on but no lipstick. Too much cake being eaten today to bother with fucking lipstick.
    424K
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    Sarah Millican
    @SarahMillican75
    May 29, 2023
    This is what 48 looks like. Happy birthday to me. 🎂
    It’s me in the garden on my birthday. The background is all green foliage. There’s also green foliage on my lovely top. My hair is clean (birthday) and my make up is Daytime Proper (as opposed to Daytime Can barely be arsed or Daytime Dog Walk). I’m wearing my pink and black glasses which I love and red lips.
    660K
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    Sarah Millican
    @SarahMillican75
    May 29, 2022
    She’s 47 today and her balloons moved.
    It’s me, all made up and hair done wearing a red and white dress and red lipstick. Behind me are two massive silver balloons. The one on the left is 7 and the one on the right is 4. They moved during the photo. Should say 47.
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    Sarah Millican
    @SarahMillican75
    May 28, 2023
    My husband sent me a photo of the tea he just made and I’ve told him not to come home.
    It’s a dark wooden bench, with grass beneath. On the bench is a small white cup. It’s filled with piss weak tea. The sort of tea for people who don’t like tea. What they like is warm watery milk. At home my husband makes excellent strong tea for us both but something happens when he’s out and about. Milk goes in first, doesn’t wait for the tea to brew. Essentially, it all goes to shit.
    1.3M
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    Sarah Millican
    @SarahMillican75
    Jun 20, 2021
    Hugs to those who find Father's Day a struggle. Whether you don't get on, he's no longer here or whatever your story, I'm sending love xxx
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    Sarah Millican
    @SarahMillican75
    Dec 25, 2021
    Well done to everyone who finds Christmas Day tricky. You did it! You got through it! Thanks to everyone who interacted on the #JoinIn hashtag. You’re all absolute smashers. Much love. ❤️
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    Sarah Millican
    @SarahMillican75
    Nov 20, 2022
    I call this season ‘Where is the dog’s shit?’
    Photo shows a background of lots of brown leaves. On top is me, well, my legs. I’m in jeans and little navy and white patterned wellies. Somewhere in the brown leaves is a dog shit. I don’t know where. This is a bad season for dog owners. Winter is better as turds ruin all snow. Also you can sometimes see the steam.
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    Sarah Millican
    @SarahMillican75
    Aug 5, 2023
    The thing that impresses me most about cooking programmes is that their baking trays are clean at the start rather than black with burnt on dinners of the past.
    525K