1. |
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Eleanor’s away for two weeks on the west coast, shitty weather
I am at the kitchen table writing and I made stuffed peppers
Brand new year again according to one of the calendars
Taking stock of what remains as the clock ticks down on all of us
Eleanor is at an artist retreat in Washington state
Three thousand miles away
Barely any deep cleaning projects left to to take my mind off the distance
I’m looking at a photo of us again
In the grand scheme of everything
We only get like a couple of days and weeks
And I wanna spend them together
Yeah I wanna spend them together
Could be doing pretty much whatever
I just wanna spend them together
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2. |
35 (May 2025)
03:11
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Two empty shelves on your book case
The packing’s proceeding slowly
Most days I wake and you’re not there
I don’t know where you’ve been sleeping
Fully over not yet done
You still tend the garden
Everything is different now
Save for all the things that stuck around
In your imagination
Is this what you wanted it?
Is this how you wanted it?
Two second pause by the front door
Notice that your backpack’s missing
I make one pour over coffee
Zone out while the future’s disappearing
Day to day it feels the same
Working hard and overeating
Discarding all our my long-term plans
No more Christmas at your parents’ (house)
In your imagination
Is this what you wanted it?
Is this how you wanted it?
I came away from a conversation
Fuming, impatient, misplaced anger
Heard your voice on the compilation
(It) softened my heart, made me ashamed
I hate feeling bitter when I do, but I do when I do
I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, its true
First ever date, 2019
You skinny dipped while I read on the dock
No grad school then, to compel me
Still I felt like I was on the clock
Six years later, in our home
Boxes fill the studio
Lesson learned a bit too late:
How much time did I waste?
Getting things done everyday
Checking all the boxes that I made
Impressing strangers with my accolades
A long CV
Anxiety
Fear, compulsion, and entropy
Nothing really left to say
Tomorrow is moving day
35 years very old
Reaping what I’ve sown
In my imagination
This isn’t how I saw it
This isn’t what I wanted
I put my books on your bookshelves
Unpacking
Proceeding slowly
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3. |
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Three fingers poking her chest
“(The) Feeling’s right here”
Came quickly, then it left
Reasons unclear
Sometimes it’s just not about you
People have their own journeys too
Sometimes the preconditions for one
Are not the preconditions for two
Five and a half years of honest loving
You weren’t gonna lie when the feeling stopped coming
Now we’re talking moving boxes
What the fuck is happening
I read last year’s birthday letter
“Something, something, love forever”
Still never sent the thank you cards
To all your family in Oregon
I’m sleeping on the couch, awake
Crying till my throat breaks
I guess I’ve finally run out of chances to prove
That I could be perfect for you
Once I walked a path I couldn’t see
You held my hand and guided me
From the river up the hill through the trees
Back to the cabin, where we slept quietly
Now another darkness lies ahead
And my unheld hands are trembling
How will I ever find my way through?
I still love you
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4. |
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Returned to the homeland
I had a slice of pizza
Remembered where I came from
And came back home to me but
At some point unrelated
A knot had come undone, two
paths that overlaid came
Out the other side of some beautiful woods
Separated
Separated
Separated
Separated
Separated
I came back home to me, repaired
But only I was there
I’d rather stay
I’d rather stay
I’d rather stay
I’d rather you stayed
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5. |
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Sometimes I hang with friends and do social interaction so poorly
I lose touch with who I am, feel left adrift, it unmoors me
But at a certain point in life
That feels weird to bring to light
Having long since learned that being who you are is alright
But what the fuck?!
There’s barely any situations where
I feel fully comfortable
And appropriately self-aware
This tension in the day to day
The inability to be normal
A hangover from childhood
I’m acting like a freak in the corner
Laying down on the floor of band room
Pull a chair right over my head
Listening to Something Corporate
A new kind of contentedness
Disappear into my earphones
Everything is simple now
Life is finding space to rest
I’m finally at peace in a crowd
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6. |
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In Pittsburgh
I met a cutie at a basement show
We made out on the porch
We talked and texted for hours on the phone
While I was on the road
She was the first to meet my parents, I’m pretty sure
And when we sat down at the table
My mother said of me
He’ll probably get married
But be divorced within ten years
The rest of the quote is fuzzy, but the gist of it was
Whoever it is, they will get fed up
And then the school year came back around again
And I got busy like I always choose to do
And soon enough, as was my manner, I withdrew
I wrote a song and left the rest entombed
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7. |
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Feeling sentimental
Everything was ten years ago
People who I don’t see anymore
Show up in the way I play guitar
Show up in the way I say most words
Show up in the strangest places
And I love them
Feeling sentimental
Everything was fifteen years ago
People who just drifted away
Show up everyday in a million ways
And I love them
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8. |
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So we’re in your kitchen
I’m cooking down the onions
You notice my technique
There’s a critical distance
When someone’s too cool to know
But with this spatula I feel competent
The permanent coffee can right there in the cabinet
Already old when I first laid eyes on it
The name tells a story I never asked to hear
Had all the time in the world but now the world is ending
So we’re in our kitchen
I’m soaping up the dishes
You’re making something sweet
It’s good to bear witness
To the mundane everyday
With each other here in the home we’ve made
The permanent coffee can right there in the cabinet
Already old when I first laid eyes on it
The name tells a story I never asked to hear
Had all the time in the world but now the world is ending
So I’m in my kitchen
I’m not cooking anything
There’s a Doordash bag in the recycle bin
And a ton of trash with plastic in it
And I feel sick
The permanent coffee can, absent from the cabinet
It’s with you somewhere else, now I’m thinking about it
The name tells a story I guess I’ll never hear
We had all the time in the world
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9. |
Empty House (June 2025)
04:56
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Empty house
Feels a little roomier
Three quarters of the pots and pans are gone
Lamp-less corner table dark
Gaps where frames with photos aren’t
I swear we had the right screwdriver
Oh wait
That was yours
That was yours
Empty house
Feels a little cleaner now
The kitchen cabinet doors are all shut when I get back home
The mugs are stacked the way I left them
Handles turned the same direction
Expect the small one with the chipped rim and the red flowers on it
The one you drank your coffee from
That one’s gone
Empty house
Feels a little lonely now
Nothing interrupts the stillness when I close my eyes
Except for everything inside
Yeah, swaddled in the silence, I sit and wait for life
But nothing in this damn house ever moves
I really fucking miss you.
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10. |
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Second anniversary
It’s the cotton one
This is already over
But it’s warm enough to sit outside
I cooked Shanghai bok choy and eggplant with garlic sauce
You grilled bulgogi in the griddle over the fire pit
Dinner superstars
A scotch, a beer, leftover rice and a chocolate good humor bar
I did the dishes and brushed my teeth
And then you were gone
In keeping with the new order of things
Same people fewer rings
(I woke up alone in the morning)
Same people fewer rings
(I woke up happy in the morning)
Same people fewer rings
(I woke happy, mourning)
Same people fewer rings
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11. |
July 2025 Forever
02:19
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Thinking about death
What goes away, and what’s left
And everything between now and then
I thought we’d be two shuffling raisins
Holding hands
Walking slow
Bickering
Now I can’t even see
Even three or four months ahead of me
You’re in JP living your best life
I am down the street somewhere outside time
Spinning my wheels like a knocked down bike
Surrounded by the fog of an endless night
Waiting on a sunrise that’s not coming
I don’t think I’ll ever have kids now
I don’t think I’ll ever remarry
I don’t think I’ll ever quite feel right
Haunted by the ghosts of my old life
Saw you at the party and freaked out
Thought we were past that stage
But I see decades of the present
And not in a good way
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The Michael Character Boston, Massachusetts
Purveyors of fine History Teacher punk since 2010.
The Michael Character recommends:
The Age of Missing Information
by Thanks
Two great dudes make incredible, experimental (but accessible) piano/drums tunes that will completely blow your mind.
go to albumIf you like The Michael Character, you may also like:
Beautiful Extension Cord
by (T-T)b
supported by 4 fans who also own “The Impermanent Coffee Can”
(T-T)b has been honing their little neck of the woods in chiprock and its really starting to flourish here. Good stuff, good stuff. <3
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You Won't Remember This
by Tuxis Giant
supported by 4 fans who also own “The Impermanent Coffee Can”
Hellbender Vinyl (https://hellbendervinyl.com/) is beyond fortunate to have pressed this record for Tuxis Giant! We love this album so much!
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supported by 4 fans who also own “The Impermanent Coffee Can”
go to album
A Split 7" Between Friends
by Dr Sure's Unusual Practice / Bench Press
A four-track bout between two of Australia's most formidable post-punk groups, fueled by wiry guitar riffs and vibrant, timely lyrics.
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Cost of Living
by Downtown Boys
Downtown Boys' Sub Pop debut is as brash, bright, and political as the Providence punk band's ever been, showcasing their songwriting.
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