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FuckOffWithLove's avatar

I am in awe of what you have survived. I can’t imagine growing up under such distress. I don’t know how I would function as an adult if that were my parents.

I also heard my daughter’s voice while reading this. I made foolish mistakes that really put her through a metaphorical pressure cooker.

She is rebellious but in the best way.

I admire her as she breaks my heart.

And it is her rebelliousness that actually awoke my own rebellion (people pleaser no more).

My husband called her woke like it was a bad thing.

I’m glad she raised some hell.

My soul is awakened and alive now. Whereas before I was alive but in a weird dark bubble. Her bravery to speak out….that’s what saved me.

Thank you for being part of the brave.

Deanna Bender (Hicks)'s avatar

This made me laugh and smile and also ponder a little harder...

Thank you, and thank you for feeling what this story was trying to convey. I love how you talk about your daughter, bravo for seeing her rebelliousness not as a bad child, but as child.

FuckOffWithLove's avatar

She truly astounds me and has been wise beyond her years for a long time. She is 16 now, 15 when I finally left my husband.

We are living our best lives now, no toxic husband energy over here anymore.

Deanna Bender (Hicks)'s avatar

Congratulations! Our children are so truly intuitive, and insistent lol -- guiding that insistence can be beautiful motion. Mine is 33 and she's stubborn as hell and I love that lol

Navigate Yourself - Danijs's avatar

Very vivid and emotional. You rock for putting it out here.

Deanna Bender (Hicks)'s avatar

Thank you so much for reading, and I appreciate that so much. It was an interesting one to look at, but man did it help me slow down and see things clearly, in a very good way.

Navigate Yourself - Danijs's avatar

You said it out load and that's the hardest part. Naming it so thst it can no longer can have a hold over you. I liked your language.

Deanna Bender (Hicks)'s avatar

Yes~~and thank you so much

Deanna Bender (Hicks)'s avatar

Thank you for the restack! I hope sharing my struggle with a label that plagued me for years, may help someone to identify a label placed on them that wasn’t theirs to own.