telectroscope___

How does your garden grow?

telectroscope — Tue, 29 May 2012 13:41:50 GMT

Hi friends! I know it has been a long time & lately I have been lurking, so I figured I should step out of the shadows. Don't look at me, I'm a monster!! JK. Been doing a lot of stuff the past year, including turning 24 in bootcamp, woohoo!

I was so excited to turn on my game and see my Battleponies were still there waiting for me, so I've been having fun playing them lately. That's Zelda up there, failing at gardening. No promises about how much I'll be able to post, but I am enjoying catching up.

Hugs <3!

MOVE YOUR BUTTS!

telectroscope — Wed, 06 Jul 2011 17:51:55 GMT

All butts should move straight to the Steam Summer Camp Sale right now! The Sims 3 and its expansions are $13.60 and below each. I've been stalking this sale like crazy (and bought a couple other games super cheap).

EDIT: Upon trying to checkout, I found out that you have to have bought your original Sims 3 game with Steam to be able to buy the others. I can't get Steam to recognize that I already have the base game, and it won't let me buy expansions. I love Steam, but they are a bunch of cakefaces.

Pets!

telectroscope — Wed, 15 Jun 2011 15:31:20 GMT

HORSES! HORSES! HORSES! (and kitties!) HORSES!

I need to keep up with the S3 news. I didn't know there would be horses!

I am thinking of getting 1 or 2 expansions soon - maybe Ambitions, and I know I want Generations. I don't know if I would use Late Night. I wish they were not $30 each.

The stuff they are coming out with for S3 is so much fun; it makes me really want to play.

Recolors: A-Z Star Wars

telectroscope — Tue, 14 Jun 2011 16:15:33 GMT

26 recolors of the base game (I think) painting 'A Stroke'. No mesh required. It costs a few simoleons, so it's towards the back of the paintings list. Included are 26 illustrations by Brandon Peat as part of his A is for Ackbar project. The adorable sim in the preview pic is rhiannon_alexis's Alfie.

This is my first set of recolors, so if you come by any issues, please let me know!

>>> DOWNLOAD <<<

First Successful CC

telectroscope — Wed, 01 Jun 2011 05:21:05 GMT

I just started making these A-Z Star Wars posters by Brandon Peat for my sims and wondered if anyone else would be interested. I generally fancy Simlish posters, but these are too cute to not have, and why shouldn't my sims learn a foreign language ;). I haven't finished them yet, but it's been pretty fast so far.

This is the first successful (as far as I can tell) CC I made; that's why I'm asking here first.

Anyway, I'm going to bed now because my head and throat feel hell-acious. The sudden change to 90 degrees from cool weather has not treated me nicely and I have been guzzling Nyquil. Good night!

Battleponies 1.1

telectroscope — Mon, 30 May 2011 20:18:03 GMT

Last time with the Battleponies...
According to the challenge, Zelda and Ois must give their child, Magus, the best start possible. Their other and future children? Let's hope they are born with common sense and the ability to store food in their cheeks, because they are on their own.

Ois and Zelda's second kid is about to unleash himself onto the world.

Zelda is simultaneously starving, deprived of sleep, unamused, and she smells like an exploding whale sandwich.

Magus: Mom, I am going to hose you down if you don't take a bath and eat some pancakes!

Ois: I don't think those pills I took were aspirin....

Not to be outdone, Magus always draws the attention back to himself.

Magus: HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII.

These two love to play, so they pretty much never get anything else accomplished. They are BFFLS.

Zelda: Magus, your brother is coming. Get ready to catch him!

It's a little boy, named Mousecarver.

Ois witnesses the miracle of birth from a cozy position.

Mousecarver: I'm cool. Not hungry or anything. Thanks for asking. Could you move me closer to the T.V.?

Ois is like the court jester of the house. Doesn't really do anything useful but fun to have around.

Magus follows in his dad's footsteps and is all about playing until you are sunburnt, frozen solid, or passed out.

Bodysuits are cool.

Little Mousecarver has a birthday already. The time spent betwixt birth and toddlerhood just involved lots of pooing and starvation.

Mousecarver: I wonder if I will still be cute.

Yes...you are very cute, Mousecarver. Don't worry. *SSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHH* Nobody tell him.

Zelda and Ois work on number three.

Sims must have virtually no control over their projectile vomiting. On the other hand, the floor is pristine.

*pinches cheeks*

*BUMP* Number three is comin'...

Meanwhile, Mousecarver is growing up alone because everyone forgot him.

My face kinda looked like this when I saw him.

Ois remains blissfully ignorant of how birth works, not that he really wants to know.

Another little boy! He's named Starflute.

Let's hope Starflute is more fortunate than his brother. I want Magus to grow up so I can start the challenges, but Ois and Zelda are so fun.

Sim Download: Zelda Battleponies

telectroscope — Sun, 29 May 2011 01:11:07 GMT

A few people said they would like to download Zelda if I put a link up, so here she is!

Download | Download NO CC

I've been playing the Battleponies off and on. I got distracted by watching Game of Thrones. If you have not watched it, DOOO IIIIIIT. Seriously, it has the best acting and characters; they are on my mind all the time. I just ordered the books, because I read book one a long time ago but didn't read them all and want to see what's about to happen. Waiting for new episodes takes AGES. At least True Blood is coming back in about a month! Eric NOMMMMman I have missed you.

Battleponies 1.0

telectroscope — Sat, 14 May 2011 16:07:44 GMT

Before I begin, you may be wondering, 'What is a sequentially erratic challenge?' Well. I'm not going to tell you. Na. Na. Na na na. Just kidding. It's right here by lovely bondchick_nett, but you don't have to go there because I am going to post the rules as I go, anyway. This is how it begins:

Start off with two adult sims of your choosing in CAS. Set them as spouses, and then roll the pacifier to give them a toddler. This child is the heir to the first randomly selected challenge.

The pumpkiny Ois was made by maranatah.

Meet Magus - the super serious brainchild of his alien daddy and pasty mama.

Happy with your sims? Lets go!

Move your new family into whatever lot you like - blank and large aka original legacy style, or an already built/furnished house on a middle-sized lot, the choice is yours. The adult sims can have whatever jobs they like, have as many more children as they want, but their MAIN focus is to give your heir the best start in life they possibly can.

The Battleponies move into their lovely new home. It was only $16,000 so I'm pretty sure the bricks are a facade and it is actually made of a mixture of packing peanuts and legos.

Little Magus does not have to worry about the being loved enough part of the challenge. As soon as the furniture is in, Zelda and Ois battle each other to squish him.

This family really loves checking each other out on the toilet.

Zelda: I was thinking of you the whole time I was peeing, sweetie.

The only thing I can think to say is dirty. So dirty. MUST NOT SAAAAAAAAAY. Just look at what a smartsyfants Magus is and think adorable thoughts...even though you are wondering now.

Speaking of adorable, these two never stop. If they are not squishing their kiddie, they are squishing each others faces with their lips.

Ois hides and Magus seeks...

Magus: O SHEET WHERE'D HE GO???

Ois: BOORHGHGGHHGHGHGHAJAALALALA!

Magus: Dude. Blew MY MIND.

They are all over Magus, except when he needs a bottle. He may not have food in his belly, but who needs food when you have a belly full of love?

Day one and they are already 'trying for baby.' I guess it wouldn't be a challenge if there weren't surprises.

Besides, how can I be mad when they look like this afterward?

Zelda then runs to the bathroom and pukes out everything she's eaten since she was 14. How romantical.

BOOOOOO-YA. BABY BUMP. I can't wait to see what this little sniglet looks like.

Ois finds taking care of Magus alone, what with Zelda in the family way and all, to be a less amusing task than he thought.

I see what you are thinking there. Ois does not in fact beat his wife while wearing an oceanic body suit.

He was just wafting his bag-of-ass armpits toward her in frustration.

I am convinced that Zelda must be carrying some sort of Gremlin inside her, because no matter how much I feed her, her stomach is a yawning pit of doom.

Poor Ois is overcome with baby-watching, since when Zelda is not eating, she is sleeping or sitting somewhere in her underpants.

Lucky for him, Magus's toddler days are finished. Lucky for Zelda, there is cake.

Hello, cute grape sniglet! He's got his papa's nose, which I love.

Now let's see how much these other sim kids have to suffer while Magus the Golden grows up. Once he's an adult, I will roll 1 of 10 challenges - I can't wait!

P.S. I don't know if anyone wants to download Zelda, but if you would, I'd be happy to post her sometime.

TS3 Pic Spam

telectroscope — Sat, 07 May 2011 05:42:32 GMT

My sim time is tiny but when I play, I've really been loving getting used to The Sims 3. TS3 and TS2 are so different that if I play both, I don't feel like I'm just playing the same game. I can't figure out how to work the sliders in TS3 to make my sims adorable like some of you guys. But World Adventures was worth the 9.99 at Amazon; I've only been to Egypt, but it is sooo pretty!

Essie Carroll - she entered the game displeased because a meteor hit her house before she moved in.

She got tired of the cranky elderly neighbors and fireman at her house, so she went to go catch some FEESH.

I don't know WTF that thing is floating in the water. Either pie or a snail.

I want to send Essie to China once she stops being so broke. I sort of cheated to get to Egypt with a different sim XD. Anyway, I will update as often as possible! Also want to play some S2 'cause CC and genetics rock harder there.

Sims 3 on Sale

telectroscope — Mon, 02 May 2011 14:22:33 GMT

If anyone is super slow or super cheap like me, I wanted to let you know that Amazon currently has The Sims 3 expansion packs at a really low price. Yesterday, I was looking at World Adventures and saw it was $14.99 was planning on downloading it today, anyway. Today it is $9.99 for either the download or the boxed game. Late Night is $19.99 and Ambitions is $14.99

World Adventures
Late Night
Ambitions

I wish they would all go to $9.99...I'm downloading World Adventures now, so I'm going to get used to that and the base game before I go too crazy. Also downloading this humongous patch which is taking forever. I'm gonna go play some S2 and cool my brain off from all the S3 jargon I've been trying to understand.

IT'S ALIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE!

telectroscope — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 18:30:41 GMT

Hello lovelies! If you're reading this, I'm shocked and awed, because I haven't checked in in so long. The good news is, I can finally play my sims again! I have just finished building myself a new computer piece by piece and love every bit of it.

Lots of things have changed: I've moved to a new state, finished school, am working (at a very dull place, but they pay me in money; it's wonderful), and have moved in with my McLover, not really in that order. So I guess it's no surprise how long it's been, but I am so excited that I can sim a little now. I've missed reading everyone's stories and have been checking my friends page every once in a while.

I'd like to play the Nerdfaces again, but I need to break my new game in. I don't even know where to start, it's been so long!

Ermengarde by charterzard and Vijay by slyndsey

Sorry!

telectroscope — Mon, 12 Apr 2010 12:45:51 GMT

I'm sorry for disappearing for a month now! I think it may have been that long since I opened the sims. I won't go into boring details regarding my time-devouring school life, which is nearing its end this month, but I miss the sims and you lovely people so I hope to return soon-ish.

Nerdface Downloads

telectroscope — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 00:18:19 GMT

This is a mini-update to say that I uploaded Saffron and Badger, so you can download them here if you'd like. I like to go into SimPE and Body Shop as rarely as possible and was in there anyway, so they are early! I haven't been simming much, but have been enjoying my spring break so far and I think I will enjoy some simming tonight (right after OMG-LOST!).

To prevent this post from being incredibly boring, here's an awesome video for you:

It may seem a bit long, but I promise it is SO SO WORTH IT. You may keel over from laughing, so watch out and don't keel!

Nerdface 2.4

telectroscope — Fri, 19 Feb 2010 17:06:11 GMT

Last time: A bunch of nerf herders went off into the wilderness and enjoyed the ferocity of nature face-to-face. Then they toasted some s'mores. Now those nerf herders return to their humble abode...

Their abode was a little too humble, so they move into this house, which had an option for 'walls built of 100% recycled school buses and Sponge Bob.'

Saffron's BFF from summer camp stops by. This is the first time I've seen this greeting in my game!

Saffron: Where did this giant cloud of dust come from? WHAT IS THIS MAGICKERY?

Saffron was beaten by a dust-conjuring mountain girl.

Saffron: AHA. You get your super powers from the air, you warlock of nature.

She can always trust her dad for good advice.
Dirk: Next time, just go for a straightforward attack with a flaming pan of bacon. The grease will blind her, leaving her defenseless, and afterwards you can sit atop her beaten form while enjoying a tasty snack.

Saffron: You are the wisest dad, ever.

Saffron never gets the chance, because camp girl returns in the dead of night to turn their newspaper invisible, never to be seen again.

Pepper: MROW. MROOOOOW. MRRRRROOOOOOOW.
Dirk: MEH. Why do we have a cat.

I thought Pepper seemed lonely, so I had them adopt another kitty, named Moonshine. I was hoping for kittens.

Unfortunately, Moonshine is an evil bastard cat who enjoys tormenting Pepper.

Ysabell returns from work and begins to feel a bit...sparkly.

Ysabell: Am I teleporting? To the moon, Scotty!

Ysabell: Hope no one missed me. I was at the moon so long, I got OLD.

Here's her Front-Lawn-Gypsy makeover.

Elsewhere on the front lawn, mystical powers have been awakened!

Saffron: I got a sparkle in my eye.

Genie: *SHAZAM*
Saffron: Shouldn't you be blue?

Saffron: You don't sound at all like Robin Williams. How do I know you are not a fake?
Genie: I just came out of a bottle smaller than a hamster cage.

Saffron: Okay, then, Genie - if that is your real name. I would like a sprinkly doughnut, with rainbow sprinkles.

Genie: *extends her teenage life*
Me: Well, that was a dumb idea.

Badger: Hi, cake! Soon you will be in my stomach.

Badger's gone for the native look.

Post-makeover is when I began to be torn about heir!

Just look at her face...and she has elfy ears.

I'd like to say that Moonshine lost this fight with Pepper, but I think he is just demonstrating his skills.

Poor Pepper! Moonshine may just *accidentally* get eaten by a werewolf.

Badger is not pleased with her sister's table talk, which mainly consists of belches.

Ysabell reaches her LTW :).

I am going to miss her when she goes. We will going straight from the generation of purple and success to the generation of FAIL, which could be more fun XD.

It's time for Dirk to display his grey hairs, too.
Dirk: I am not okay with this.

He is fine with it if he gets to display his purple hair, though.

Ysabell's talking to Badger when she notices something strange...
Ysabell: Don't move, Badger. Don't freak out, but I think there's something floating above your head.

Saffron and Badger were going a bit stir crazy, so they invited another mountain friend over.

He tried to put the moves on Saffron, while the gardener seems upset in the background.
Saffron: I THOUGHT YOU WERE GAY?!

Gardener: Argh. Shrubbery.

Badger: Badger, always the nicer of the two sisters, is less hostile.

Badger: Too bad his ass is nothing to speak of.

Things got so quiet that Saffron began training Moonshine to play dead, because, you know, it's such a great idea to improve his combat skills.

It is one of the best animations. He sways a bit and then topples over drunkenly.

Saffron: Why are there so many candles on here? I thought I was only getting a year older.

Saffron: Holy cow plant, I have boobs!

She promptly breaks down in the ritual black-generation meltdown. There are so many to come.

Me: Laugh now, Badger. Your time is coming!

bondchick_nett's Goldie offers Saffron a blind date to awaken her from her derangement.

GUH...This is sixamsims's Sherlock. Goldie is one magical blind date fairy.

Even more surprising is that they actually get along and have two bolts.

His shyness is a counterpart to Saffron's tactlessness.

Saffron has her very first face melding.

*Dirk stands openly staring*
Saffron: This is my box, Dad. Stay out or face your demise.

Saffron: Think about where you are putting that hand, sir. Think verrrry carefully.

Saffron doesn't keep up the appearance of being coy for very long.

Badger: Ah, my virgin eyes! I feel myself getting older already.

Nice depressed-looking bear shirt.

And now... some freestyling spam.

Badger Nerdface

Saffron Nerdface

Now I am having a hard time making a decision for heir. I would love to have Badger's elfy ears floating in the gene pool, and she is a ray of sunshine, although she fails at failing. Saffron has wonderful eyebrows of doom and fails quite hardily given any situation. Who to choose?

Omegle

telectroscope — Thu, 04 Feb 2010 04:06:56 GMT

I have so many better things to do than cavort with strangers on Omegle, but nothing comes to mind at the moment. This stranger just made my night!

Nerdface 2.3

telectroscope — Sat, 23 Jan 2010 18:45:33 GMT

Last time, over a month ago, Ysabell Nerdface got cozy with a fiery-haired man named Dirk and they had a child named Saffron. Saffron is fortunately named and unfortunately tempered. This time, the Nerdfaces will be taking a vacation, but first there is some family business to take care of.

Romance sims that they are, it understandably took Ysabell and Dirk a while to get up to the engagement stage. Hopefully, by the time they get married, one of them won't be saying, "Hold on. I dropped my teeth somewhere over there by the fig newton tray."

Saffron is a picture of beauty and grace, as always.
Saffron: I curse both of you with malignant armpit odor.

The only one who ~~can't tell her no~~ will be her friend is the cat.

Ysabell is so frustrated about having another bastard child that she punches her head through the wall.

It's another little girl, this one named Badger (continuing the Firefly theme).

Saffron: OH YAY. It's a baby. Rah-effing-rah.

She's similarly unsympathetic toward ghosts. After being scared by the haunting image of her grandmother:
Saffron: OH NO. I'm soooo scared. Are we finished here, grandmother, because The Simpsons is on.

Badger turns into a toddler, complete with poseable arms and a mouth big enough to store small items in, like a chipmunk in winter, or a night stand.

I'm sure when this bear died, this is not where he saw his adorable head going afterwards. Bear: "When I die, I'd like to be decapitated and placed on small children."

Pepper, the cat, has a habit of sleeping in the path of whoever is trying to leave the bedroom. Many a Nerdface has nearly died of starvation before I noticed this.

Badger is either upset because no one is paying attention to the poor black generation kids (awesimsauce) or because her teeth are probably not supposed to be coming out of her chin.

Maybe teenagehood will bring out the softer side of Saffron.

Saffron: KITTEH. I will tell you a secret. I hate everyone in this house...except for my fellow black generation sister, Badger. And you, kitteh.

Me: Come on, cheer up for the camera. I want to take a decent makeover picture.

Me: That's much better.

Me: Oh, that's nice. REAAAL NICE.

Exhibit A. How not to hold a toddler.
At least she's helping without complaining too much.

Badger has some really nice features, and seems less angsty.

Don't be fooled by her cool demeanor, though. She is just better at hiding the RAAAGE.

Since the kids can basically take care of their own needs now, it seemed like the perfect time for a family vacation!

The natives are really welcoming.
Tarzan Man: *beats chest and lets out an earth-shattering roar*

Saffron: *confounded*

Saffron: *does not like to feel confounded* Do not confuse me. Confuse me again and you will die.

Dirk and Ysabell head straight for the hammock of woohoo.

Do not try this in real life. You will probably break something.

After that, they take it to the next level - the tent of woohoo.

Saffron runs into the Unsavory Charlatan, and is won over by his dastardly good looks.

Saffron: He is allowed to donate his genes to my future unborn baby.

Well, he is really good looking, but unfortunately for her, and fortunately for me, this is a pixel_trade legacy.

Saffron and her mother come together to operate some kind of pickpocketing or sexual harrassment scam.
Ysabell: My daughter and I invented a new type of handcuff the police are going to use. Did you want to see it?

Innocent Victim: This handcuff feels oddly like someone raiding my backpack, which is full of my wallet and earthly belongings.

Saffron: Can't I do anything on my own??? I'm going to go start my own handcuff molesting scheme if these people don't leave me alone!

Ysabell tries axe-throwing for fun.

Saffron tries axe-throwing for practice, for the future.

Saffron: KILLLLLL! I mean....yay!

She REALLY enjoys chest-pounding anyone she meets.

Ysabell and Dirk go on a mountain tour. The tour guide inexplicably walks around with his eyes closed for about 5 real minutes.

This is not the face you want to see as you drive into the wild, away from civilization.

Tour Guide: Oh shit, I think I just sent them to the bear caves.

Me: WHO IS THIS? That is not even his picture. He probably killed him and stole his clothes.

Saffron has the hots for her fellow campers and tries her pimping skills (I first wrote pimpkin skills - which I can only assume would be pimping for children).
Saffron: Are you a magnet, 'cause I'm attracted to you.

Saffron: I am a magical being. Take off your pants.

Saffron: If you were a booger, I'd pick you first.

Badger is still there, enjoying some quiet time with the rainbow trout.

Saffron indulges her pyro side and starts a s'mores marathon.

Saffron: HELLLOOO delicious little s'more.

Saffron: Now you face your doom! Do you have any last words?

Badger: NOM NOM. I'm gonna eat you.

Badger gets along great with the natives.
Badger: Did you know the crazies don't just come out at the full moon?

Mountain Man: OH REALLY?
Me: *has flashbacks of inbred horror movies*

Badger: OH YES. Believe me. I see aaaaaaaaall.

Saffron has another run-in with the Unsavory Charlatan.
Unsavory Charlatan: Come here, young woman. I have a special secret to tell you.

Unsavory Charlatan: *SURPRISE BUTTSEX*

Unsavory Charlatan: Just kidding. I just wanted to steal your simoleons.

Saffron heads back to camp, only to be turned down by this Margaret Turner.

Saffron: In America, you do not turn the Saffron down. The Saffron turns YOU down.

Saffron: *rage boils to eye sockets* Do I have to deal with her?

Then, as if by magic, everyone takes a chill pill. Must be the mountain air.

And so ends their wilderness vacation. The Great Bear bids them goodbye and hopes that they did not get directions from the identity-thieving tour guide again.

Cryogenic Smarmy Smorgasbord

telectroscope — Sat, 16 Jan 2010 02:24:21 GMT

I finally made myself a new header!

P.S. The subject is because I am trying to fix the CSS.

Pirate Queen Bee: Vol. 2

telectroscope — Fri, 15 Jan 2010 21:36:18 GMT

These poor kiddies have been waiting to be shared since way before Christmas, but mysteriously haven't been posted yet. It can't be related at all to me receiving Zelda: The Phantom Hourglass for Christmas. Maybe a little, among other less fun things XD.

This is the queen bee herself, Scarlett Crown, and she has moved on to her second swashbuckler.

Meet dorkasaur_sims's Chip, the poor soul who stumbled upon this wacky shore. That is the look of innocent ignorance.

Au contraire; Chip is not as innocent as he seems. That looks ranks fairly high on the devious intentions scale.

Forget everything they told you about guys' little swimmers and hot tubs. What happened next is evidence which decimates that theory.

-----------------------------------------

Evangeline

Gideon

Kristopher

Marquis

Song

Sonja

Just like in the first post, downloads include all custom content, except for the maxis island clothes. They are part of the unlocked bon voyage outfits, which you can find right here. I would include them, but they make the file sizes HUGE.

WRATHY WRATHFULNESS

telectroscope — Sun, 10 Jan 2010 14:29:19 GMT

I wasn't sure if my photobucket pictures were getting a bit pixelated or not, so I did a side by side comparison of my original image and a photobucket upload (this image is uploaded on lj scrapbook). Behold, photobucket doth deceive me! My image is getting divided into huge cubes!

I know some of you have had this problem. Is there a high quality setting on photobucket? Or should I just try downloading a client to upload images to lj scrapbook? I've already got a paid account at photobucket, so that's not the reason.

My images are already compressed as much as I would like them to be, and yet photobucket is editing my pictures for me >.<.

The Return

telectroscope — Sat, 09 Jan 2010 21:02:49 GMT

I can't believe it has already been two weeks! I missed the sims a bit, but I had an amazing break. Now I can enjoy catching up a bit here, and my next semester begins in 2 days.

I am using this icon because I just watched Something Something Something Dark Side, which was pretty funny. I was eye-sexed by Avatar and Sherlock Holmes over vacation, too, which were both awesome.

Now that my 16 hours of bus-riding is over, it's time for a shower and toothpaste.

Vacation Time

telectroscope — Mon, 28 Dec 2009 03:41:07 GMT

I'll be [sort of] gone for the next two weeks, since my boy's coming to see me, then we're traveling up to his house, and then I'll be coming back home around January 9th. I'll still be able to comment, just won't be playing Sims or updating.

Remember: when going to an uncomfortable family gathering, always bring Scrabble or booze. For maximum enjoyment, bring both. By the end of the night, 'asfdjklfsdf' will seem totally acceptable as a word.

I'm gonna miss simming for a while, and I hope you all have had a wonderful Christmas and have a bit of rest too!

P.S. The pic above is Hob Scaleytoe and my pixel_trade founder, Kizzy Bowen. They are both on my photo lot and are madly in looooooooove.

Pirate Queen Bee: Vol. 1

telectroscope — Sun, 20 Dec 2009 01:31:18 GMT

I really wanted to participate in this queen bee challenge, and since it's a little outrageous and would probably take several years to complete without cheating, I have cheated in any way I could imagine. All downloads are at bottom. Now, on with the introduction...

This is Scarlett Crown, Pirate Queen, and future bearer of 60 children. Her father was a pirate, and she grew up on his ship. One day, however, the crew was struck by a terrible case of dysentery. Scarlett survived, although she seemed to be a bit battier afterwards.

Her ship eventually beached itself upon an island, and Scarlett disembarked. The land was habitable enough, and she built herself a home which would survive the salty seas. Other pirates have heard of her, and most stay far away. They fear she may have some mystical power, since she was the only survivor on her ship.

Others just think she's loony, which is true. She waits on her island for a worthy man to help her amass her family, to make up for all she lost.

One day, she was constructing a sand castle for her crabby friends, when someone approached.

Stranger: Is that a crabby castle I see? Don't forget to add a bathroom. Lovely progress on the grand foyer.

It's dorkasaur_sims's Bruno, who looks very devious with an eye patch.

Scarlett shows off her steering skills, despite having managed to steer a small ship into an enormous island.

Scarlett: Watch out for the gulls. They have murder in their eyes. CA-CAAAAAAAAAW!

Scarlett: Just kidding. It's the polar bears you really need to watch out for.

Surprisingly, Bruno does not try to run and finds the crazy pirate queen alluring. She lures him back to her cabin to begin populating the island with her offspring.

*TIME PASSES*

*PEACEFUL OCEAN NOISES*

.............

*SOFT CRUNCHING NOISES AS THE POLAR BEAR APPROACHES YOU, THEN DECIDES TO EAT YOU LATER*

Ash Bough

Buckler

Cutless

Estrella

Grace

Halifax

There are a few more pics I could not resist taking below, since it was my first experience with the pirate ship:

Downloads include everything except for skins & the castaway stories outfits (the ones with the body paint), because they made the files about 25 MB each. If you'd like them, you can find them right here.

Nerdface 2.2

telectroscope — Thu, 17 Dec 2009 01:59:45 GMT

Last time in the Land O' Nerds, Seldom the Evil and So On and So Forth moved out with his *ahem* girlfriend, leaving Ysabell to run this city.

Since the family came across some whopping loads of money, I unleashed my inner interior decorator to fix up Ysabell's room.

(Actually, my inner decorator bolted; if you have seen him, please return him to me, preferably alive. He is going RIGHT back into the hole after this.)

Ysabell and Dirk approve. Nothing sets the mood like being impaled by a pillow or two.

Ysabell: OMG did we just go to second base?
Me: You are waaaaaaay past that. I'd say somewhere in the bleachers by now.

I may have accidentally made Adora electrocute herself. But the dishwasher REAAALLLY needed to be fixed.

Tomas: *GASP*
Ysabell: OH NO, MOM!

*Adora leaves*
Ysabell: HAHAHAHAHA did you see her face? It was like a surpised chicken!

bondchick_nett, if you are reading this, I apologize now!
Ysabell brings bondchick_nett's Drustan home from work, and I am at a loss as to how he ended up wearing the football makeup. Or why I made him not an alien. I still find him extremely adorable.

They've come home just in time for Naked Time.

Ysabell's enjoying adding another notch to her makeout post, when...

Holy crocodiles! Another reason not to kiss a guy: first you'll get pregnant, then your top half pops off of your bottom half, and those are some VERRRY painful stitches.

Outside, Dirk is having some similar body issues - his face is melting off.

This is due to the extreme G Force involved in dive-bombing piles of organic matter.

The question is: raking - worth it, or not worth it?

Later on, Dirk and Drustan are involved in a wizarding argument.
Dirk: FOOL! My wife isn't a wizard! She failed her OWLS.
Drustan: I wish she was performing a spell on ME right now.

Sometimes, it's all about window placement.

Drustan: I wish I could make out with her ear right now.

Drustan: Oh no - did she read my thoughts? I am full of shame. But I still wish I could make out with her ear.

He gains sweet chocolately baked goods points by talking to her belly later.

And a whole lot more points for vacuuming off her face.

Popping can be completely safe with appropriate attire! See, both halves of the body in this scenario are completely attached.

How sweet...they're going to dance the intoxicating dance of love.

OH! OH NO! Belly melding. For the couple who shares everything.

This is how Ysabell says I love you without words.

Dirk: *silently* Right back at ya.

Ysabell rolled the want to woohoo in the car, so...
Dirk: Do you want me to do my manly salsa dance before or after?

Dirk: CAN I DO IT DURING?

Ysabell did not seem to come out quite so well from the situation...

Dirk: Next time, I think I might try kissing you.
Ysabell: What a revolutionary idea.

They haven't gotten married yet, because I thought Ysabell wouldn't be able to settle down since she's a romance sim. With a fully maxed out bar, she still wants to woohoo with Dirk, though. It's so cute! Oh, and make out with 5 sims, but that can be lived with.

Ysabell's following the rule of having her baby in the smallest room in the house.

Ysabell: I never should've let Dirk get to second base!

It's a girl, named Saffron (following a Firefly theme now). She's got a mix of their skin, her grandmother's black hair, and Ysabell's eyes.

What is more inappropriate than woohooing on the front porch in front of your mother/mother-in-law?

Your mother-in-law finding you sexy while doing so!

It makes letting your baby eat your face seem almost acceptable.

Saffron grows up, because she was stinky and I was tired of her inhuman wailing.

I take it back - she can eat my face if she wants to. I would probably command a legion of Undead for this face.

Speaking of Undead, Grimmy arrives to take away poor Tomas, and almost leaves Saffron with a bionic leg replacement.

Grimmy: Sorry about that, but it was more like one of her toes, really, and probably not even one she needed for balance.

Goodbye Tomas; you were a lovable nerd!

Nerds usually have generous insurance plans.

We are off to a great start with the black generation. Already, little Saffron learns life lessons: Don't kiss boys (you'll get pregnant). Either become a vampire or you're gonna die.

Grimmy comes right back for Adora the same day, which is kind of sweet.
Adora: I can see you there, Dead Hula Girl. Your boob is coming out of the wall.
Dead Hula Girl: Subterfuge fail.

Grimmy employs some new tactics...
Grimmy: Here. I pulled this out of my nose.

Ysabell tries to hide in the dresser, but just manages to stab herself in the crotch.

Next, she tries to devour her own arms by putting them into her stomach. This works a little better, and Dirk finds her HOT when she does it.

Everyone was so sad that I got them a kitty. His name is Pepper.

Pepper is practiced in the ninja skills.
Pepper: *HSSSSSSSSS* KOMODO DRAGON STANCE.

He seems to cheer Ysabell up a lot. She is now BFFs with a cat, and I'm not too sure if I've made things better or worse.

Saffron vents her frustrations on Pepper, but that can be payback for all the furniture he's been trying to eat.

That's right, Pepper. Do what she says, and no one will get hurt.

Saffron's time to grow up from a tiny angsty person to a small angsty person.

She's got really strong features; I can't wait to see how she grows into them.

Saffron:*FLAILFLAILFLAIL*

Saffron: How DARE you grow me up in these UFO pajamas? Do you think I LIKE tiny green men? Well, I don't. I've seen V. They're evil, and I hope they die.

And now, for something completely different, I leave you with this bit of WTF-ery. Pepper seems to be trying to get out of the cloud of death and Saffron's path of rage. There is no escape!

Adopt a Nerdface & Archives

telectroscope — Sun, 06 Dec 2009 23:10:53 GMT

Sims should be packaged with all custom content, so use clean installer to remove any you don't need! Please let me know if any of the downloads aren't working.

Nerdface Archives
1.1 | 1.2 | 1.3 | 1.4
2.1 | 2.2 | 2.3 | 2.4

-----------------------------------------------------------
GENERATION 1
Adora (Founder)

Adora is actually Alexis by katu_sims and can be found in the October Founder Collection at pixel_trade.
Family
::6:10:3:3:3::

Tomas

Tomas was created by jenji_sims, and can be found here.
Family
::3:8:8:3:3::

-----------------------------------------------------------

GENERATION 2
Seldom

Knowledge
::10:5:8:3:3::
Download
Note: Seldom may show up wonky-looking, with witch skin on just his head. Until I reupload him, you can fix this easily by making him a witch and then curing him of witchiness.

Ysabell

Romance
::7:8:3:8:3::
Download

-----------------------------------------------------------

GENERATION 3
Saffron

Family
::2:7:2:9:6::
Download

Badger

Popularity
::10:8:2:2:9::
Download

Nerdface 2.1

telectroscope — Sun, 06 Dec 2009 20:26:34 GMT

Last time, on the Nerdy Bunch, Seldom found out he likes to wear dancing shoes and listen to midnight sonatas, unlike the other boys. Ysabell, meanwhile, is ready to be off the backburner now that Seldom has found his inner warlock.

EDIT: Fixed my photobucket rage issues. We shall see if they decide to deface any more of my extreme hardcore images.

RE-EDIT: Just put up the downloads page as a sticky on this journal if anyone happens to want to download Seldom or Ysabell :).

This family likes to take pillow fights to the next level; I think this is Battle of the Downy IV.

Who's that being a lurking lurker? Poor Seldom - if he didn't live on such a high horse, he could join in.

At least since he's getting married, someone else has to deal with his high horse. He belongs to stakeit_uk's Artemis now!

I now pronounce you Elf & Warlock. I now command you to go make cute babies.

Artemis: Don't forget - you promised if I married you, we could do that thing with the spatula and the candle wax.
Seldom: D: I was hoping he would forget about that.

Adora: How dare you steal my signature style? I INVENTED the Spatula Candle Wax Move.

Tomas was too busy working to be in the debate. I chose 'disappear' since I saw how that double thing worked out in The Prestige.

YOU JUST WON 25,000 SIMONLEONS. WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO NOW?

Buy ~~a pony~~ more than one toilet! *notes to self to DL some ponies later*

Ysabell: How come these gay dudes get to make out all over the house and I don't? Can I get a boyfriend or at least a blow up doll???

Seldom's a big warlock now, so I move him out with Artemis. Ysabell's so eager for him to be gone, she's already staring at the door.

House makeover! Now with 115% less eye bleeding!

The purple generation needed this crazy cool car. Tomas' money is going to very good use.

Tomas: All this spending! It is giving me a heart attack.

Ysabell: Father, your heart is in your chest cavity, not your arm.
Tomas: THE PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIN!

Ysabell goes to the community lot since she is bitching incessantly. I'd just like to point out that when you back out, you should usually look BEHIND you.

Ysabell: *swipes*
SWIPER NO SWIPING!

Ysabell should probably stay away from this chick. Far away.

Ysabell: Oh what a magnificent flower garden! It has a diverse amount of species and is so lovely.

Ysabell: KILL KILL KILL!

Ysabell: I smash the ruined flower which is my love life!
Other sims: *move away cautiously*

Ysabell: HAHAHAHAHAHAA I am a destructive goddess.

LATER....

Ysabell: I hate my life.

You know when a witch walks into the shower with you, things about to get much better or much worse.

Ysabell: POWER! What will I do with so much raw, acid green power?

Ysabell: *paints by numbers evilly*

After this, I get the witches can wear any clothes hack, so she looks normal again...for now.

Speaking of hobbies, Adora has taken up pottery.

Thank you for gracing us with this masterpiece of ceramics.

Time for Ysabell to escape the prison bars of teenhood.

I will take that as a -5,000 for black 1980's underwear.

What a nice long nose you have, my pretty! Ysabell's LTW is to reach the top of the Slacker career.

Now that she is legal, it's off to the community lot!
Tomas in background: *yodels lovingly to Adora*

Ysabell's more interested in windows than man-scoping.

She hits on radiationpoison's Kameron, who is astounded by his own Grecian beauty.

Kameron: Those pig tails remind me of little puppy dog ears. *is overcome by sexy puppy dog ears*

bondchick_nett's Dirk: I heard your mom's into spatula woohoo.

Alfredo (lemon_lime35) has returned, surprise! Once again, he has invited himself over for the billionth time. I realized who he reminds me of...

Alfredo: WHAT'S UP YOU GUYS?

Ysabell and Dirk have a sexy pillow fight date.
Ysabell: WOOO what an excellent match of pillow fighting. I would like a break now.
Dirk: IT'S NOT OVER YET. Get ready to be destroyed.

Ysabell's into that kind of thing. She finally gets her first kiss and I feel like less of a woohoo-blocker.

Ysabell: I heard from someone who heard it from someone about this new move...Something about a kitchen utensil. Waffle iron?

Dirk: Well, I have this stethoscope...
Ysabell: *twitches from mental image*

Ysabell's bring the sexy tube sock back.

She decided she wanted to woohoo with 3 sims, so this is number 2 - lemon_lime35's Charles.

Ysabell: I hope you don't mind, but I have this thing. See, at the end, I like to handcuff a gerbil to the bed.

Charles: HOW DID YOU KNOW MY THING? Let's woohoo right now.

NUMBER 3. Kameron just cannot stay away from her sexy ear hair.

Ysabell: I hope you don't mind, but I have this thing. See, at the end, I like to have a large man come in and catapult us through the window.

Kameron: OMG me too! Let's woohoo right now.

I'm not sure how this is the next logical step, but Ysabell is crazy about Dirk, so he's worth more than one woohoo.

In fact, Dirk is moving in because he's adorable.

And really freaking loaded.

Here's a pic which does not fully illustrate his adorable face.

Here's a pic which fully illustrates his adorable face.

Until next time! I will get on uploading Seldom and Ysabell soon, so there can be a nifty family tree.