The Blank Slate

LJ is Dead, Long Live LJ

tabular_rasa — Sat, 15 Apr 2017 14:59:23 GMT

Well, a bittersweet but timely post, all in all. I just switched over to posting at Dreamwidth and having it crosspost here rather than posting directly at LJ as I have for the past 13 years since I started my account. I was thinking of making some sort of demarcation like "Here is where I switched from LJ to DW" so I suppose this is a good one.

Now that LJ is 18, do they have the right to decide their nationality for themselves? Any change of changing back to American citizenship? XD

Top 100 Songs of 2014

tabular_rasa — Thu, 08 Jan 2015 15:56:30 GMT

Time for my commentary on the Top 100 Songs of 2014!

Important note: This is not my own personal ranking of songs, but taken from a pop radio station's official list based on airplay and requests or whatever. (I used iHeartRadio ranking this year, which Jessica and I actually did listen to the last 8 songs of during our drive on New Year's Day). I just like to go through and provide commentary on the official list as a way to reflect upon the year's music, since I enjoy listening to pop music in major part because of how it's so connected to a certain place in time. The songs are on for a limited period of time, so when I listen to them I am brought back to that point in my life. And the lists are always interested to go back and look at, too, to see which songs I have remembered vs. forgotten and which ones I change my feelings about as they're played more or less.

Plus, so much pop music is fucking hilarious. I am not a snob. The worst pop music is often the best just because of how ridiculous it is.

If you have any strong feelings about songs you heard this year, I'd love to hear them!

1 Dark Horse - Katy Perry
Omg I'm so glad this is #1. What an excellently ridiculous song.

I already liked it for the minor key, main simile that doesn't make any sense in the context of the song, and laughable rap interlude ("She can be my Sleeping Beauty/I'mma put her in a coma"). I sang it at karaoke on my birthday and it was great. Then it got even better when while she was actually making her Thor and Loki comics, my sister observed that the song sounds like it should be sung literally by Loki when he's seducing Svadalfari, which is just perfect. I even made a post on her comic Tumblr about it and it got a little love:

Also, 2014 was the Year of the Horse, so it's extra appropriate!

2 Counting Stars - OneRepublic
Well, no denying this ranking, as I did hear it a lot this year. I wasn't obsessed with it but I didn't hate it, either.

3 Talk Dirty (feat. 2 Chainz) - Jason Derulo
I liked this song for a while before it wore out its welcome through repeated play, but I thought it was fun in a kitschy sort of way, like an updated Travelin' Man. I liked the saxophone bits. Brandy remembers this song as "The song Theo was almost born to" because it was on her birthing playlist, but then Theo was born too fast for her to turn the music on XD

4 Timber - Pitbull feat. Ke$ha
I really only heard this song a few times at the end of 2013 when my sister pointed it out to me, so I'm surprised it got this far up the rankings. However, I'm glad to see that the ridiculous songs prevail as chart-toppers.

5 All Of Me (Album Version) - John Legend
I liked this one, I thought it was really sweet. I have to hand it to John Legend for fairly consistently writing songs with romantic yet mature and honest (ie: acknowledging flaws in people and relationships, not painting the person as perfect or "addicting," talking about giving and working together) lyrics. I think it was overplayed to a point, but credit to how much I liked it that I never got sick of it.

6 The Monster - Eminem
I continue to enjoy Eminem and Rihanna's collaborations. What I particularly liked about this one was its fairly unusual take on "crazy" and monsters in one's head. While in music mental illness is often glorified, it's only desirable in a self-destructive, "beautiful mess" kind of way; however, this was basically saying "I know I'm fucked up but I'm dealing with it, so let me continue to deal with it in the best way I can rather than trying to 'fix' me." Most of the verses are just Eminem soliloquizing about his own experiences with fame and public image and whatever, but I really liked the chorus.

7 Am I Wrong - Nico & Vinz
I wasn't crazy about this song but I do have a memory attached to it. After going on my meh date this year, this came on the radio as soon as I got in the car. Am I wrong, for thinking that we could be something for real? it sang. "Yes, yes you are wrong," I replied.

8 Team - Lorde
I liked this song, though I can't put my finger on why. I think I just like Lorde.

9 Pompeii - Bastille
I liked this as well. The ey-ey-o ey-o chant was cool and fun to sing (reminded me a little bit of ooga-chucka and boom-shaka-laka-laka, lol), and I liked how the lyrics were vague enough to apply to a wide range of situations. I started off thinking of it in terms of a story I was writing but also applied it to my breakup and whatnot, too. Video was a little cliche, but whatever.

Fun mondegreen for this song is "How am I gonna be an octopus about this?"

However, I liked Bastille's Bad Blood even better and I heard it on the radio for a while, but I guess it wasn't popular enough to break the top 100. It's a great song to apply to any rivalry-being-repaired situation. Hell, maybe I'll request it at my 10-year reunion next summer, lol.

10 Rude - MAGIC!
This song was okay. It was catchy, but it also got annoying. I did like all the parody response videos it inspired, though, implying that the father has good reason to deny his blessing.

I also just think it's funny that the accusation he comes up with is "rude." Not "unfair" or "unreasonable" . . . Rude. Like farting without saying excuse me, lol.

I also do have to wonder where the girl fits in with all of this. Shouldn't she be the one who makes the call about their marriage? Or persuade her father if his blessing really matters so much to them?

11 Happy - Pharrell
One of those songs that was fun to have on when I was actually happy, but annoying as fuck when I wasn't.

12 Burn - Ellie Goulding
Ellie Goulding's music is all just very . . . pleasant. Like I'm never super obsessed with it, I don't bust out singing along with it, but I keep it on and enjoy it.

13 Stay With Me - Sam Smith
I liked it, but I am an angst muffin. And apparently I missed a glorious moment when Mikel and Jessica were discussing about her staying on a friend's couch during the week in order to save gas money on her commute to school and he just busted out singing this song. I wish I had been there.

14 Fancy - Iggy Azalea
The first time I heard this song I thought the Charli XCX part was Gwen Stefani, lol. I don't really care for Iggy Azalea, but she's been undeniably successful this year. My biggest thoughts with this song were:
1) there is no highway (and thus no fast lane) between LA and Tokyo. Do you even geography?
2) what is this try hard accent
3) stop being on the radio so damn much

15 Latch - Disclosure feat Sam Smith
I don't remember hearing this song at all? Either I missed it somehow or it flew majorly under my radar. Listening to it now, it does remind me of something much older than it is.

16 Problem - Ariana Grande
I kind of liked this song in spite of myself, lol. I think it was mostly just that sax hook.

17 Not A Bad Thing - Justin Timberlake
I guess I do remember this song, but it mostly escaped my notice.

18 Story of My Life - One Direction
I cannot for the life of me figure out what this song is about? She breaks up with him? He is distant towards her? He is desperately trying to win her back? It sounded all right (standard minor-key pop music appeal) but it frustrated me I couldn't figure out what the story of One Direction's life actually is.

19 Wake Me Up - Avicii
This was a key song I remember from 2013 but I got sick of it from overplay into 2014. I liked Hey Brother better.

20 Ain't It Fun - Paramore
I didn't hear this as much as its #20 ranking would suggest, but it was okay.

Also HOLY SHIT in the video, for a split second Hayley is holding a pile of stuffed animals including my Piggy doll I've had since I was a baby. I don't think I've ever seen another one besides my own!

Not gonna lie, that's a little weird in a song about "living on your own in the real world," lol.

21 Summer - Calvin Harris
Oh, this was annoying. Those electronic keyboard violins, yikes.

22 Demons - Imagine Dragons
Nothing special but it was catchy-- and it's a four chord song, so go figure.

23 Boom Clap - Charli XCX
I don't remember hearing much of this song, actually, but I liked it well enough.

24 All About That Bass - Meghan Trainor
I cited some thoughts about this song earlier in the year. Given my own body shape I feel like it can only come off as bitter and defensive or something, but I'm not a fan of how the song denigrates thin and worked-on ("silicone") bodies in the name of "body acceptance" and whatnot, nor some aspects of the video. I'm sure it's well-intentioned and a lot of the lyrics are good-- and it's certainly catchy!-- but there's enough in the lyrics and video that are problematic that I'm just kind of /: about it.

25 Black Widow - Iggy Azalea
Probably the Iggy Azalea song I liked most this year, music-wise. Though the video . . . apparently Iggy is an equal-opportunity appropriator? I guess if I squint it's just a rip-off of Kill Bill. (Though I'm not exactly sure why a song about persistently forcing yourself on a guy until he can't stand it anymore gets a revenge-on-male-pigs music video?).

26 Best Day Of My Life - American Authors
Fun and inoffensive. I wasn't always in the mood for it but I liked it overall. The video with the little monster companion was cute. (Also, totally weird and dorky but given the band is a foursome and the line about howling at the moon with friends and it being the best day of my life kind of made me think of Remus Lupin and his acceptance with the Marauders. Maybe the little monster companion is a shadow of his werewolf self? Lol).

27 Shake It Off - Taylor Swift
I was honestly expecting this song to be #1 or at least in the top 5, given from the time I moved to St. Louis in September on through December I swear every single time I was in the car this song would play at least once. Maybe it benefited from being played on multiple broadcast genres, or the St. Louis metro area was particularly obsessed with it, but I got really sick of it. Normally I like Taylor Swift, though, and I think it's cool she's developing a self-aware sense of humor about herself and her public image.

28 Maps - Maroon 5
I've talked in these countdowns before how I alternately love vs. hate every Maroon 5 single in pretty consistent order. This was one I liked. I had it on my traveling playlist for the road trip this year because of the driving beat and some of the "I was there for you; where were you for me?" sentiments, though I was doing pretty much the opposite of following the map that leads to Robert, lol.

(Just watched the video, which is like an unnecessarily graphic Memento ripoff that doesn't really suit the song?).

Also, this song was popular around Halloween and when they say "Following following following" I kept wanting to say "Halloween Halloween Halloween," lol.

29 Classic - MKTO
I swear I have never heard this song before in my life?

30 Turn Down for What - DJ Snake & Lil Jon
Oh Lil Jon, I am glad you are still making music. I actually thought this song was really catchy and enjoyable, lol. And the video is both hilariously absurd (albeit a little disturbing) and surprisingly well-produced. Like a modern Dancing Plague! (And I kind of appreciated that everyone was kind of scummy and average and just in shitty urban apartments).

31 Bang Bang - Jessie J ft. Ariana Grande & Nicki Minaj
This song was like a musical representation of (sexually charged) schoolyard trash talk, and actually not bad as far as clever turn of phrase. I thought it was kind of fun.

32 Break Free - Ariana Grande feat. Zedd
The song was okay, not terrible but not particularly memorable. But what the fuck is this video? Sometimes I feel like Ariana Grande is like a cartoon stereotype of a pop star, where everything is so mass-produced and her videos are all just cheesy backdrops for her kind of mugging and looking cute and not really dancing or anything, and is kind of unnecessarily diva-ish to boot. (And then the protagonist of the TV show realizes she is all just marketing and no substance and is horrified at this disillusionment of her hero or whatever).

33 Stay The Night - Zedd feat. Hayley Williams
I thought this was kind of annoying; it sounded like a bunch of etudes or something, not a real tune.

34 Rather Be (feat. Jess Glynne) - Clean Bandit
It wasn't a super favorite but I enjoyed this song. However, I'm confused as fuck by the video, which is like a more cryptic version of the video to Pompeii by Bastille, just set in Japan?

35 Neon Lights - Demi Lovato
I don't remember hearing this song, but maybe it just flew under the radio for being fairly predictable EDM-sounding.

36 Me And My Broken Heart - Rixton
Oh, the song that was literally the chorus of Rob Thomas's Lonely No More but with a different fourth line of the stanza?

37 Royals - Lorde
I think of this more as last year's song, but I continued to like it.

38 Let Her Go - Passenger
I paired this song with Cups (When I'm Gone) on my post-breakup playlist, lol.

39 Hold On, We're Going Home - Drake
Drake is like the male equivalent of Ellie Goulding to me, just sort of pleasant and inoffensive without really arousing strong feelings either way.

40 Habits (Stay High) - Tove Lo
I love this song. (I thought the video was surprisingly effective for such a simple concept, too).

And I like that my post-breakup coping habits are a million times healthier than hers, lol. Binging and purging twinkies into a bathtub? Hooking up with married men? Sleeping with whomever because I ~just can't spend the night alone~? I just took a couple weekend trips to see close friends, started a new novel, and wrote a bunch of shitty fanfiction . . .

41 Say Something - A Great Big World feat. Christina Aguilera
The very first time I heard this song in December 2013 I remember thinking, ironically enough, that "It's so nice I will probably never have to relate to a song like this again." You know, because Robert and I were happy, supposedly. Welp. I remember this was on a lot in the immediate aftermath of the breakup. Actually, I have to hand it to pop music; early 2014 was full of really miserable songs that suited my recent experiences, lol.

42 Don't Tell 'Em - Jeremih
First thought about this song, which is a general thought about many songs: Why do so many songs just make up random names for people that have probably never been used as names?-- especially when there's so much emphasis on the name in the song? I've never met a Windy, Sloopy, Chewy (unless?), or Rio. Meanwhile, there's a lot of girls in the world who have never had a song sung about them. I guess at least Rhythm makes sense as a dancer's stage name . . .

I'm also failing to see how this song would ever be successful in its intended purpose. Hey girl, why don't you do all these exhausting sex acts for me that I enjoy, and in return I'm going to hide you like a shameful secret? I guess maybe there's a market for that, but I don't get it, personally.

43 Wrecking Ball - Miley Cyrus
I will shamefully admit I listened to and enjoyed this song at the beginning of the year post-breakup, if for nothing else than the "Don't you ever say I just walked away" line, since Robert basically thwarted all possibility of working on improving.

But also the internet did some glorious things with the video:

44 Don't - Ed Sheeran
I liked this song and its vindictive honestly, especially the irony of him getting so butthurt about a girl doing exactly what she said she was going to do and they agreed upon in the first place.

The video apparently has the same Dancing Plague theme as Turn Down For What, lol.

45 Chandelier - Sia
Love this song. It's one of those songs I just sort of wish would keep going on and on for at least twice as long as it does. (It's also one of those songs I wish I could just belt out singing, but I don't have the range). Though, like Habits, it's yet another song about coping mechanisms I thankfully don't relate to.

I also liked the really wacky video, which was not just oddly fascinating in its own right but reminds me of this weird habit I had as a kid I called "running around and thinking," where I would just spend hours sort of dance-hop-twirling around my living room (and occasionally outside) while focusing my mind on various imaginary scenarios. For some reason-- and I think this does make physiological sense-- I found that my imagination was far more vivid and immersive when my blood was flowing and I was moving, especially if I was imagining something particularly active or intense. (I guess it's also similar to how when I'm writing emotional scenes, I tend to make faces that reflect the characters' emotions, and sometimes people walk in on me looking supremely pissed or about to cry and are like "Uhhh what is wrong with you?"). It drove my mother absolutely crazy. But I actually wonder sometimes if I'm less creative as an adult because I no longer do this; maybe now that I live in a house rather than an apartment, I should pace around more often, lol. Unfortunately, it's not something I could just replace with going for a run or something because I can't just be running straight; it involves like a bunch of hopping and spinning around and really crazy-looking shit-- like the video, just with less flexibility and actual gymnastics. (And I realize I sound like a crazy person, but so far I've met at least two other people who do/did this as kids, so at least I'm not alone in my crazy!).

46 Hey Brother - Avicii
It did reach an overplay moment for me, but otherwise I liked this song.
I also liked that it was the first song that came on as the between-movie music after seeing Captain America: The Winter Soldier, which I thought was appropriate. (Would also have been appropriate for Thor: The Dark World, lol).

47 Sing - Ed Sheeran
I remember hearing this song a few times, but it mostly flew under the radar for me. However, the video with muppet Ed Sheeran is cute, lol.

48 Bailando - Enrique Iglesias
I like how Enrique Inglesias just chose a different conjugation of the same verb that gave him a hit in 1998 and got another one. I have to admit I prefer Bailamos (which was one of my favorite songs in 5th grade, lol), but hey, you keep dancing, Enrique.

49 The Man - Aloe Blacc
Oh yeah, the one with the Elton John sample(ish), lol. I didn't find this song particularly memorable but I did really like the video of him taking on different eras and figures in civil rights and black pop culture.

50 Roar - Katy Perry
Same thoughts as last year; it wasn't bad, but it was pretty bland, and I just wish it had been played about 1.5x faster than it actually was.

51 La La La - Naughty Boy feat. Sam Smith
I don't remember hearing this song at all, but listening to it now I like it alright. Video is cool and apparently references a Bolivian legend, as well as The Wizard of Oz? (Of course, half of YouTube thinks it's the Illuminati, of course).

52 Really Don't Care (feat. Cher Lloyd) - Demi Lovato
Song is pretty forgettable. Not entirely sure how I feel about the video centering around Pride when the song isn't really about it and I don't think Demi is LGBT herself? (Is she?), so it seems a bit like a ploy for attention or some kind of "cred," but I suppose at the same time we could always use more visible and positive portrayals of LGBT people in media.

Oh and Cher Lloyd is still a thing?

53 Sweater Weather - The Neighbourhood
My thoughts on this song haven't changed from last year, except WOOHOO I LEFT CALIFORNIA.

54 Cool Kids - Echosmith
I've never been a cool kid nor desired to be one, but I liked this song.

55 Animals - Martin Garrix
There were two songs called "Animals" this year? Lol. The one I remember is the Maroon 5 one, probably because it actually has lyrics. But now that I'm listening to this through, I'm recognizing that I did hear it and I really liked it, although due to the style (reminds me a little of some '90s/'00s techno?) I think I presumed it was an older song being brought back for some party mixes rather than a new release.

56 Love Runs Out - OneRepublic
I didn't hear this song much, but I quite like it. Though it also reminds me a lot of Kanye West's Love Lockdown.

57 Take Me Home (feat. Bebe Rexha) - Cash Cash
I don't remember this song at all?

58 Love Me Again - John Newman
I don't remember this song, either, and the guy's voice in this song is really weird. Is there like a sheep-ify autotune setting?

59 Animals - Maroon 5
Oh hey, I liked both Maroon 5 singles this year. I didn't like this one as well as Maps, but I kept it on and sang along with it.

60 Slow Down - Selena Gomez
I remember hearing this song but no strong opinions about it. Pretty bland and forgettable.

61 Waves (Robin Schulz Radio Edit) - Mr. Probz
I remember hearing this, but it flew under the radar. Inoffensive, no strong feelings.

62 Blame - Calvin Harris feat. John Newman
I heard this song a few times with no particular opinion on it, but then my sister pointed out this guy sounds like a duck and now that's all I can hear and see.

63 Wiggle (feat. Snoop Dogg) - Jason Derulo
Oh god I forgot about this song, lolololol. I'm not surprised it didn't get super popular, but lmao "How d'you fit all that in them jeans? You know what to do with that big fat butt," patty-cake, "your booty like two planets; go ahead and go ham sammich," wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle as a chorus, and the little whistle-y hook thing . . . it's almost iconic. But just almost. (Seeing as how I forgot about it, lol).

64 Red Lights - Tiësto
I don't remember this song at all. But please people, don't run red lights.

65 A Sky Full of Stars - Coldplay
I found this kind of annoying. *Shrug.*

66 Show Me - Kid Ink feat. Chris Brown
Yeah, I remember hearing this. It was whatever. I ask this every year, though; why does Chris Brown still have a career?

67 Come Get It Bae - Pharrell Williams
We're using "bae" in song titles now? Okay.

I can't remember if I heard this song or not? It's not especially memorable to me so maybe I just didn't notice it.

68 Trumpets - Jason Derulo
Omg this song. If my SO were to hear those shitty keyboard-programmed trumpets every time I got naked, I'd be a nevernude to spare the poor fucker.

69 Wild Wild Love - Pitbull feat. G.R.L.
I'm a bit tired of Pitbull, so if this was on I probably just changed channels.

70 Unconditionally - Katy Perry
Blah. On the whole, I don't like slowed-down ballad Katy Perry.

71 Come With Me Now - KONGOS
I never really acknowledged this song as either good or bad, but I'm realizing now that I usually ended up keeping it on and enjoying it, so I guess it's one for the good pile.

72 Jealous - Nick Jonas
I only heard this a few times near the end of the year, but it's alright. I don't endorse the sentiment, but I liked the music.

73 Drunk in Love (Explicit Version) - Beyoncé feat. Jay-Z
This was kind of a weird song with how slowed-down and not particularly melodic it was, but I could dig it; it was sexy.

Also, weird to realize that Single Ladies came out just as I started 5 years of dating in succession (Andrew, immediately followed by Robert) but as soon as I break up Beyonce is all OMG I LOVE BEING IN LOVE.

I'm surprised Partition wasn't on this list, though? I think I heard it more than Drunk in Love. (And the whole thing-- lyrics and video both-- reminded me a lot of Chuck and Blair's post burlesque club limo sex scene in Gossip Girl, lol). I'm not sure which I preferred.

74 She Looks So Perfect - 5 Seconds Of Summer
I don't remember hearing this, but I probably thought it was One Direction. Very boy band-y.

75 Shower - Becky G
Never heard this, but it's cute.

76 Brave - Sara Bareilles
This song was still around this year? I liked it but I don't remember hearing much of it this year.

77 Fireball - Pitbull feat. John Ryan
No more Pitball plz thnx.

78 Sleeping With A Friend - Neon Trees
It wasn't a big favorite but I liked this well enough. I have no personal experience with the hooking-up-with-a-friend thing but this seems like a worthwhile topic to have a song about.

79 2 On - Tinashe feat. Schoolboy Q
I never paid too much attention to this song but it's catchy and enjoyable. For a while I was thinking "2 On" (I'd love to get 2 on) was about initiating a threesome-- especially since she keeps mentioning her hot girlfriends-- but apparently not.

80 Hideaway - Kiesza
I don't remember hearing this song but I dig this chick's voice.

81 This Is How We Do - Katy Perry
I have some vague recollection of hearing this song but I didn't hear it often and it didn't stick out to me.

82 Girls Chase Boys - Ingrid Michaelson
I liked this; it was never overplayed for me, it was cute and made a good point (post-breakup: life goes on). Also, I made a point to listen to see if they mentioned girls chasing girls and boys chasing boys, and they do!

83 Na Na - Trey Songz
Not particularly memorable but I liked it enough.

84 Blank Space - Taylor Swift
I was meh about this one from Taylor Swift, too, though I did like the video as a parody of her previous romantic videos crossed with how people stereotype her in regards to her numerous failed relationships. (Also, I'm with everyone who definitely thought she was talking about "Starbucks lovers," lol).

85 Anaconda - Nicki Minaj
Not my favorite from Nicki. Baby Got Back is just too iconic to be anything other than distracting ("Why am I not listening to the actual song?") as a sample, especially cropped mid-line, and the rhythm/cadence of some of her verses were almost identical to Tik Tok. Also, again with the denigrating "skinny bitches," sigh. (Good thing I don't go to the club anyway, lol).

86 Heroes (we could be) - Alesso feat. Tove Lo
I'd prefer to be Immortals, honesty.

87 In Your Arms - Nico & Vinz
I feel like I heard this a lot? It's okay. Sometimes I'm in the mood for it, sometimes I'm not. The video is sweet and sad, though.

88 This Is How We Roll - Florida Georgia Line
Oh lol it's the band that collaborated with Nelly on Cruise. (Side note, I love when Nelly collaborates with country artist, because WELCOME TO THE URBAN MIDWEST: HICKS AND HIP HOP).

I don't really remember this song. Maybe it wasn't as present on LA pop stations, since it sounds pretty ~country~. But I also didn't hear it in St. Louis, either. I guess it depends on when it was popular?

89 L.A.LOVE (la la) - Fergie
Don't remember this song at all, which is okay, since I have very little love for LA, lol. I guess she took a note out of the Pitbull playbook and just lists a bunch of random cities. However, props to her for pronouncing Tokyo as two syllables (to-kyo) rather than three like most English speakers (to-ki-o).

90 Centuries - Fall Out Boy
I preferred Immortals (which I heard much later in the year and was associated with the Big Hero 6 movie so I'm not sure it will ever get as big) but I liked this okay. I ended up associating it with the third Hobbit movie (like from Thorin's perspective or something) because I heard it a lot around the end of the year, and what with all the lines about legends and gold and going down in history, lol.

91 I'm Not The Only One - Sam Smith
I liked Stay With Me but now that he has a few singles out I have to agree with ONTD's assessment with Sam Smith as a dementor, lol. Dude, you do love you some downer songs.

92 Love Me Harder - Ariana Grande
Haven't heard it much, but it's okay. Is this being used in the Fifty Shades of Grey movie by any chance? Because with the bit about biting her lip, "if you know about me and choose to stay," "take the pleasure with the pain," love me harder . . . ?

93 Wait On Me - Rixton
Don't remember this song at all.

94 Dangerous (feat. Sam Martin) - David Guetta
At first I was thinking this song was this Dangerous, which I heard way more . . . but apparently not? I don't remember hearing this song this year, but the video reminds me of Rush. (Especially since they specifically mention Lauda and Hunt, lol).

95 Do What U Want - Lady Gaga
Don't remember this at all. I feel like there was some lingering Applause into the beginning of the year, but I don't remember hearing this at all. Was it just released?

96 Lips Are Movin - Meghan Trainor
I haven't heard this song much (yet), but it strikes me as a very one hit wonder followup kind of song . . . a little too close to the original to be a breakthrough. (She even says "I gave you bass" . . . ).

97 Birthday - Katy Perry
I don't think I heard this, but the video is cute.

98 Young Girls - Bruno Mars
Only time I heard this was when the countdown Jessica and I was listening to started over from 100 again. I'm glad the chorus specifies "young wild girls" because I think the song is a very specific portrayal of what young girls are and want, lol.

99 Beg For It - Iggy Azalea
I guess this one is on the rise because I've begun hearing it quite a bit lately. I'm meh about it so hopefully I'm not stuck hearing it too far into 2015.

100 Steal My Girl - One Direction
Catchy, but "A couple billion in the whole wide world" <- Really? I don't think your girl has even been seen by that many people, let alone desired by them, lol.

Looking back, overall it was a pretty good year for pop music. Or maybe I have finally stopped expecting pop music to be good and just expect it more to be entertaining, lol. This year was interesting since the list wasn't as dominated by a few big established names and there were a lot of random newcomers.

However, there were a few songs I'm surprised didn't make the list, or I wish would have.

Bad Blood - Bastille - Mentioned above that I liked it a lot, probably even better than Pompeii, and it was on the radio for a little while.

Partition - Beyonce - Mentioned above how I heard this even more than Drunk in Love.

Dangerous - Big Data ft. Joywave - Mentioned above that I heard this far more than the other Dangerous on this list.

#SELFIE - The Chainsmokers - How could we forget this iconic song of 2014? It's the zeitgeist of the year encapsulated in a really obnoxious song!

Stolen Dance - Milky Chance - I remember this being randomly popular (though maybe only on an alt station I was listening to in LA) for like a month, but I liked it. Also lol @ the band name rhyming with the song name; that's just asking for a one-hit wonder.

Doses and Mimosas - Cherub - Another one that was probably centered more on the alt stations, but I liked it especially back when I thought the lyrics were dosas and mimosas-- like, getting some Indian pancakes with brunch. (I maintain the song is better my way).

Human - Christina Perri - I continue to like most Christina Perri stuff that ends up on the radio (though I haven't bothered to look up her other work). I heard this a few times but I guess it just never gained traction. I think she's singing about the agony of being in entertainment and expected to go beyond the normal expectations, but of course I just ended up applying the song to everything from Marvel fanfiction to one of my novels >.<

Take Me to Church - Hozier - I was hearing this for a little bit before I left LA, wondered if it was just an alt station thing, and then started hearing it in the past couple of months on a pop station in St. Louis, so maybe this one is on the rise. The video is super dark but I think it works for a song comparing/contrasting love, sex, and lust to religion. (And it's on my writing playlist for my novel involving a conspiracy of pseudo-gods, for obvious reasons, lol).

Previous years: 2013 2012 2011 2010 2009 2008 2007

Writer' Block: Bringing Back Nostalgia

tabular_rasa — Wed, 17 Dec 2014 21:11:14 GMT

Yesssss Writer's Block is back!

Honestly, the only reboots I've really liked have been things I wasn't super familiar with the first iteration of, lol. (Or things which have been rebooted so many times I just accept there's like 800 different versions, like superhero universes). When I liked the original, I generally take any direct reboot as an attack that cannot live up to the genius of the original. The irrational emotion of nostalgia and all . . .

That being said, I'm kind of surprised no one has made a Redwall movie for theatrical release yet. Given the state of CGI/motion capture and how much people loved Rocket in Guardians of the Galaxy, it seems like they could even do a "live action" one at this point if they wanted. (Not that that would necessarily be the best way to do it, but at this point you know that's how they WOULD do it). THE TIME IS RIPE HOLLYWOOD.

Outside of media, though, I'm in favor of bringing back things like toys and snack foods from when I was a kid. Drink some Ecto Cooler HI-C while being disappointed about how Crossfire is definitely not as cool as the ads made it look.

Top 100 Songs of 2013

tabular_rasa — Sun, 25 May 2014 03:04:04 GMT

This was posted on May 24th . . . but I'm posting it here for easier reference.

As I do every year, I took a Top 100 list of songs as decided by a radio station and have made my comment on them. Completing this 5 months after 2013 has ended has taught me that the bulk of "important" music of 2013 was really forgettable . . .

1 Blurred Lines feat. Pharrell and T.I. Robin Thicke
This song was pushed so hard as the “song of the summer” I wouldn’t have gotten sick of it from overplay alone, but my dislike runs deeper than that. I was meh about it when I first heard it—at work, softly playing on the radio all I really knew it by for a while was the song with all the “Hey hey HEY”s—and came to like it less and less as I learned the lyrics and it continued to play over and over and over again. It’s funny, because the Internet also fucking hates it-- and yet everyone in person seems to love it and gets super affronted and shocked when I say that I don’t.

That being said, I do feel a little bad that Blurred Lines specifically gets so much hate for something which isn’t even remotely uncommon in pop music, since it’s not like Robin Thicke personally invented rape culture. I mean, just think of every song that celebrates the persistent pursuit of someone who has clearly expressed their disinterest. (Every Breath You Take? One Way Or Another? Etc). But it is nice to see that society (at least Internet society) is apparently not going to stand for that anymore, at least not without a lot of bitching.

It is really catchy though, I’ll grant you that! I will dance along sometimes.

2 Thrift Shop feat. Wanz - Macklemore & Ryan Lewis
This was amongst my favorite songs of last year, but it remained popular into this year and maybe the popularity was delayed over the on the East Coast, or something.

3 Just Give Me A Reason feat. Nate Ruess - P!nk
Normally I love P!nk and most of the songs I’ve heard by F.U.N. . . . but this was bland and tedious as hell.

4 Can't Hold Us feat. Ray Dalton - Macklemore & Ryan Lewis
I went about 3 months before I realized this song wasn't saying "like this city can't hold us" but "like the ceiling can't hold us." And it was this video that broke the news:

Apparently others had trouble comprehending this lyric as well. But mondegreens aside, it was a good song. Catchy and despite being played a lot, I didn’t get sick of it.

Though am I the only one who finds all the New World explorer/conqueror imagery in the video a little uncomfortable, especially given Macklemore’s position as a white rapper? (Ie already flirting with concerns about appropriation?). I dunno, I’m probably reading too much into it-- musicians like to show themselves traveling around and being beloved by everyone as a general rule-- but given the deliberate colonial-era imagery and how Macklemore’s talked about white privilege and whatnot I kind of wonder how this wouldn’t have occurred to him. (Or if it was intentional . . . what on earth he means by it?).

5 Radioactive - Imagine Dragons
This song was so weird for me, it was like every other time I heard it I liked it, and other times I just wanted to change the channel. I seriously have no idea how I feel about it.

6 Mirrors - Justin Timberlake
This was one of those songs that faded into the background for me. I liked it fine when I noticed it, but it didn’t jump out at me as something I needed to own and listen to in perpetuity or anything.

7 Stay – Rihanna
This was ALWAYS on, and luckily faded into the background enough to not completely piss me off. But I change the channel when it comes on the radio because it’s just so boring and overplayed.

8 When I Was Your Man feat. Mikky Ekko - Bruno Mars
Another fairly boring one that mostly went under the radar for me. But I remember listening to it around Valentine’s Day last year when Mikel was being weird about buying Jess flowers and I just wanted to be like JESS PUT THIS ON TOP VOLUME ON REPEAT ALL DAY AND SEE IF HE GETS THE HINT.

9 I Knew You Were Trouble. - Taylor Swift
I heard this less in 2013, but I hated it in 2012 and that didn’t change.

10 Roar - Katy Perry
This song is so basic, I do not understand why it is so popular except simply that Katy Perry has established industry presence. (Which I’m sure is of course the reason). It’s repetitive with weak, phoned-in lyrics and it’s not even fast enough to pump the energy it’s meant to drive; at least kick it up to double time so it might suit a pre-game pump-up medley for high school girls’ sports teams or something. And I am so over this fake-skipping business; can’t we just be grateful that we have the technology to provide smooth musical phrasing? Not to mention using autotune to create pseudo-trills instead of actually demonstrating any vocal skill . . .

At one point I encountered a review that complimented Roar on being *so culturally literate* for referencing Queen, Survivor, and Muhammad Ali. Which is funny, because I just thought those were hack-y ripoffs of clearly superior work.

At least we did get this Vine out of it:

Which is like this year’s Taylor Swift screaming goat, only cuter.

11 Royals – Lorde
It started to get overplayed by the end of the year, but for the most part I like this song. I like the minimalism and almost a capella harmonies-- such a contrast to the overload of EDM these days-- which I’m sure was a deliberate choice given the message.

However, one thing I can’t figure out if the song is genuinely an anthem to having fun with less or if it (perhaps inadvertently) is more of a “sour grapes” thing. Maybe I’m just caught up in the dramatic irony of just how many singers and rappers start off going on about having/coming from nothing and inevitably end up reveling in the riches, but for someone who doesn’t want to rich life she seems awfully pressed about the lifestyles of the rich and famous and how hers is such a contrast. There’s also the bit where she wants to “live that fantasy” of pretending to be a ruler called Queen B(ee). So, you’re not about class and money but you’ll fantasize and posture as royalty?

(The lyric is especially funny to me because when I hear “Queen B(ee)” I automatically think of it as the nickname of Blair Waldorf from Gossip Girl, who 1) was in fact shamelessly materialistic and crafted her entire identity around her privilege and class, and 2) actually was legit royal--by marriage-- for like 2 episodes in the show. Queen B does not count her money on the train and drive a Cadillac in her dreams, lol. I feel like Lorde would at least be vaguely conscious of this reference but she is only like 16 so who knows).

This possible hypocrisy doesn’t make me like the song any less, though. Why not be self-aware of our lust for status and riches even as we *know better* that we should appreciate what we have?

Also . . . am I the only who hears “My friends in Iowa crack the corn” instead of “My friends and I, we’ve cracked the code” in the second verse?

12 Get Lucky feat. Pharrell Williams - Daft Punk
Robert got the new Daft Punk album as soon as it came out because he really likes them. I like Daft Punk well enough myself , but you have to admit, their songs are inherently repetitive. This is fine if you’re listening to the song every once and a while. This is not fine when you are subjected to the usual pop hit treatment of once-an-hour airplay for weeks on end.

I liked Get Lucky the first few times I listened to it while in Robert’s car, the ‘70s throwback feel and the simple joke-y narrative of a girl who wants to stay up to do her thing while the guy is only staying up with her in hopes of getting laid. However, after listening to it more than 8 times a day while at work, I had to ask him to skip over it every time it came on. I even pissed him off when we went to karaoke in July and I refused to let him sing it, that’s how sick of it I was. Now that its rein is over I’m less dial-jumpy when it comes on, but thanks, radio, for doing what you do best: ruining good songs with overplay.

It’s come back into good graces again for me now, at the end of the year now that it’s heyday is done, but holy shit I don’t like it when Daft Punk has hits on the radio. WAY. TOO. REPETITIVE.

13 Suit & Tie feat. JAY Z - Justin Timberlake
This was fun. I was never obsessed with it but it was fun.

14 Locked Out Of Heaven - Bruno Mars
Got really annoying really fast.

15 Ho Hey - The Lumineers
Oh hey I seem recall wondering why this wasn’t on LAST year’s list. Seriously, does it take songs that are popular in California 6 months to reach the East Coast?

16 Scream & Shout - will.i.am and Britney Spears
Boring as fuck and like Roar and We Can’t Stop, the tone of the song completely fails to match the lyrics.

17 We Can't Stop - Miley Cyrus
This is one of those songs that everyone was talking about during the year but I literally never heard on the radio. I did look it up at one point and it actually kind of disturbed me. Given the lyrics/theme you’d think it would be this pumped-up party song, but it’s surprisingly subdued and that confuses me. Like, I don’t understand when I would want to listen to this song? It doesn’t pump me up.

The video vaguely reminds me of a more polished/bright version of Fiona Apple’s Criminal, what with aftermath of what looks like a really weird sex party, stuffed animals, pools, and lots of way-too-close shots of the lead singer scantily clad and playing up her “underage” look . . . but that’s all probably accidental.

Of course Wrecking Ball blatantly rips off Nothing Compares 2 U, so who knows.

18 I Love It feat. Charli XCX - Icona Pop
This song was okay when I was in the mood for dance pop. But it’s really a mean song, if you think about it. You got bored so you trashed all your boyfriend’s shit for no reason? (Or maybe the reason is because he’s 20 years older than you-- “you’re from the ‘70s but I’m a ‘90s chick”-- and you’re apparently having trouble relating to him? In which case, why even date him to begin with?). Jesus, get a get grip O.o

19 Don't You Worry Child feat. John Martin - Swedish House Mafia
Remember this more as a 2012 song, but it was okay. A little overplayed, but fine.

20 Wake Me Up – Avicii
I started off really liking this song, as well as this general sort of folk-pop revival we’ve been getting lately what with Mumford & Sons, The Lumineers, etc. The Avicii stuff has been especially interesting given the odd and yet oddly acceptable combination of folk + EDM. (Which is not entirely unprecedented. I must say, Sweden, your inexplicable love of American folk + electronic dance music from it will never not be entertaining). And I liked the lyrics of this song so far as being young and wishing I were older and understand more about my shit resonates with me right now.

However, over time it was played to death and I got pretty sick of it >.< And I will say I like the soloist and his melody much more than the EDM breakdown itself and I wonder if I could track down an acoustic version or something instead. I think I would like that better than the actual single. I also feel the same way about their follow up Hey Brother, which I think I like even better on the whole.

21 Daylight - Maroon 5
Meh.

22 Cruise feat. Nelly - Florida Georgia Line
I barely heard this song this year, but the concept cracks me up. I don’t really know what Nelly has been doing with his life the past few years, but I have aways enjoyed him and I find his periodic collaborations with country artists to be amusing. I mean, he’s the St. Louis rapper and St. Louis is like a little urban beacon in otherwise rural country culture so it’s not like it doesn’t entirely make sense, and yet it’s just so funny to me.

23 Holy Grail - Jay-Z
I didn’t hear much of this this year, but I dunno, it kind of rubbed me the wrong way. It’s essentially about how awful it is to be famous? Which, I mean, I’m sure it can be . . . but from a fan perspective, why am I supposed to want to buy something that is essentially telling me how awful I am? And maybe he’s singing more vaguely about *Fame* itself, or the media in general . . . but I dunno, if so I feel like it would have been better to make that clear?

Plus it’s just not that catchy or memorable to me, either.

24 Come & Get It - Selena Gomez
The song itself was infinitely less memorable than all of the wank about Selena wearing Indian costume in the video.

25 Gangnam Style – Psy
I think of this as more of a 2012 song, but YASS PSY YOU KEEP ON KEEPING THE AMERICAN POP CHARTS FROM BEING 100% ENGLISH.

26 Feel This Moment feat. Christina Aguilera – Pitbull
Borrrring. Also yes Pitbull, we know you enjoy Miami. Because you have told us in LITERALLY EVERY SONG YOU ARE IN.

27 Safe and Sound - Capital Cities
The little trumpet-y noises really started to piss my shit off after a couple months of this and now whenever it’s on I immediately turn it off before they’re stuck in my head forever.

28 Clarity feat. Foxes – ZEDD
Tedious and annoying. Also I could not get over the lyrics:
If our love is tragedy, why are you my remedy?
If our love's insanity, why are you my clarity?
Um, if your love is tragic and insane, probably he’s NOT your remedy and clarity and you should GTFO. Like, yesterday.

29 Same Love feat. Mary Lambert - Macklemore & Ryan Lewis
I mean, I liked it. I especially liked when it would come on the radio at work and my overtly homophobic coworker would hum along and clearly had no idea what it was about :P

That being said, there has been a fair amount of criticism for Macklemore as a straight white male artist using a traditionally black medium to speak out on issues like homophobia and white privilege, which raises questions of why the pop/hip hop platform hasn’t opened enough to actual gay and POC artists to say these things themselves, at least with anything close to the audience of Macklemore. Like, why couldn’t Mary Lambert herself have gotten the same level of recognition and popularity for the original She Keeps Me Warm (with its positive video of a nice normal girl-meets-girl love story with a HAPPY ENDING) instead of Macklemore using her hook with some verses about how he briefly *thought* he was gay but oops, maybe not, etc?

But I suppose given the world being as it currently is, better to have an ally saying something useful on the subject than nothing at all. Let’s just hope it actually opens the door to something, and not just more ally self-congratulation?

30 Treasure - Bruno Mars
Of all of the Bruno Mars songs this year I think this was the catchiest, most enjoyable for me, but I wouldn’t miss it if I never heard it again.

31 My Songs Know What You Did In The Dark (Light Em Up) - Fall Out Boy
Oh hi there Fall Out Boy, I missed you!

32 Cups - Anna Kendrick
Is this based on a folk song or something? Because it’s so catchy and familiar-sounding to me.

I like to imagine this song paired with Passenger’s Let Her Go like she’s being like “Um, you’re gonna miss me when I’m gone, just warning you . . . “and then the next day Passenger’s like “ONLY KNOW YOUR LOVER WHEN YOU LET HER GO!!” and she’s like “What did I tell you?”

33 Sweet Nothing feat. Florence Welch - Calvin Harris
Oh I heard this a lot. It didn’t bug the crap out of me but I wasn’t dying to hear it all the time, either. At least now I know what she’s actually saying, because for a long time I thought the lyric was “sweet madness.” Because I listen really carefully, apparently.

34 Diamonds – Rihanna
I heard this song like 8 times a day for about a month and then never again for the rest of the year, lol. I guess it wore out fast on people. I didn’t mind it when it wasn’t overplayed; it’s super repetitive, but it’s also in a minor key, and you know how that sits with me.

35 Heart Attack - Demi Lovato
Usually I like Demi and her intensity, but this was a little too over the top to me. Just so much belting . . .

36 Try - P!nk
P!nk wasn’t really on for me this year. I think I just don’t care for her slowed-down tracks so much. I prefer when she’s got more energy, whether it’s upbeat, angry, or playful.

37 The Way feat. Mac Miller - Ariana Grande
Ariana Grande is one of those people I hear mentioned online a lot but have no idea who she is. And I don’t know this song. I don’t know.

38 One More Night - Maroon 5
I went back and forth between whether or not I liked this song. I think it’s one of those cases where I liked the verses but not the chorus, and I didn’t care so much for the “ooh-ooh-ooh” bit in what sounded like a painful range for the lead singer.

39 I Will Wait - Mumford & Sons
And now it makes the list. There must be some kind of West-to-East lag with these hits charts, because I heard this song way more in 2012.

40 Wrecking Ball - Miley Cyrus
Everyone had so much to say about this music video-- that it was exploitative and hypersexualized, that it ripped off Sinead O’Conner and so on and so on-- and while I really don’t have much to say about it myself.

Except that this cracks me up:

(Especially considering she’d just broken up with his brother. In real life. Not Loki).

And this is adorable:

However, I did actually like the song itself! >.< I listened to it a lot especially at this beginning of this year, post-breakup. Yes, I did just admit that.

41 It's Time - Imagine Dragons
This song is okay but I wasn’t hugely fond of it and it got overplayed.

42 Love Somebody - Maroon 5
Meh.

43 Little Talks - Of Monsters And Men
This was on the list last year and although I briefly got sick of it from overplay, I still like it at this point. It still makes me think of Simon and River Tam. I don’t know. Shit makes sense in my head.

44 Home - Phillip Phillips
I didn’t hear this a lot but I liked it. More of this pop-folk revival thing I’ve been digging.

45 Some Nights - fun.
Another from last year.

46 I Need Your Love feat. Ellie Goulding - Calvin Harris
I liked “Lights” better but this was okay.

47 Beauty And A Beat feat. Nicki Minaj - Justin Bieber
No different thoughts from last year.

48 Catch My Breath - Kelly Clarkson
Fine but mostly forgettable.

49 The Other Side - Jason Derulo
Also fine but mostly forgettable.

50 Carry On - fun.
I didn’t like fun’s stuff as much this year. This was meh to me.

51 Gone Gone Gone - Phillip Phillips
I remember this more from last year. I do like this guy, I think, though.

52 Hold On We're Going Home – Drake
I remember hearing this occasionally and knowing it was Drake and vaguely liking it, though apparently not enough to learn the title or lyrics because I had to look this up :P

53 Summertime Sadness - Lana Del Rey
I have a bunch of songs from Lana Del Rey’s first album so I’ve been listening to her for a couple years, but this is the first song of hers I’ve heard on the radio. It’s not my favorite Lana song but it’s okay. The weird tragic lesbian suicide music video is kind of weird, though.

54 Sail – AWOLNATION
This may be my favorite song of the year, actually! It was never popular enough to be overplayed and I was always happy to hear it. Also, this Vine cracks me up more than it probably reasonably should:

55 Next to Me - Emeli Sand_
I liked this! This chick can actually sing, not just be enhanced by autotune . . .

56 22 - Taylor Swift
Taylor Swift is becoming more and more sour on me as she no longer represents some nostalgic avatar of my own lonely little teenage self but has become a twentysomething with a very different take on being a twentysomething than I do. My experience with age 22 was very different from this song and I hope to hell I was not anywhere near this obnoxious S:

57 Girl On Fire - Alicia Keys
I do like Alicia Key’s voice, but like many Alicia Key’s songs the lyrics were rather repetitive and kind of superficial.

Though it is funny to think that maybe there is about a girl who is literally on fire and Alicia Keys is just like “Hey guys check this shit out!”

58 Applause - Lady Gaga
I just remember there being a lot of talk about this song online and not realizing I’d actually heard it because I didn’t recognize it as Lady Gaga or it didn’t particularly stand out to me. However, the more I listened to it the more it grew on me. It’s not my favorite thing but I enjoy it well enough.

Also lol @ radio stations bleeping the line “One second I’m the kunst, then suddenly the kunst is me.” She’s either referring to the German word for “art” or the artist Jeff Koons whose art inspired her album cover (and probably both, tbh). Not cunt. Who the fuck pronounces cunt with that long of an “oo” sound, anyway?? Even outside of the US?

59 Troublemaker feat. Flo Rida - Olly Murs
I do not remember hearing this song at all.

60 Madness – Muse
Normally I like Muse, but this was too slow/boring or something for me, and it got overplayed. I didn’t care for it.

61 I Cry - Flo Rida
I only remember the chorus with the high voice in this. Otherwise, no thoughts.

62 #thatPOWER feat. Justin Bieber - will.i.am
Ugh songs have hashtags in the title now? That hashtag-laden music video for Blurred Lines wasn’t enough? Out of principle I’m not even going to look up what the fuck this song even is.

(And then along came #SELFIE . . . ).

63 Alive – Krewella
I don’t remember hearing this at all, but it’s not bad?

64 Demons - Imagine Dragons
This is a classic example of a 4-chord song. Which means I recognized that it was basically psychologically engineered to be a hit and liked it nonetheless, lol.

65 Best Song Ever - One Direction
Oh hey, One Direction actually stopped being this thing I heard about on the Internet and actually showed up on the radio! I thought this was fairly cute in your standard pop-y boy band way, making the same joke as Tenaciuous D (a song about a song that isn’t the song being sung).

The video is weird as hell, though . . .

66 We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together - Taylor Swift
Same comments from last year still apply, though I heard this less.

67 Let Me Love You (Until You Learn To Love Yourself) - Ne-Yo
Oh yes, I remember this from last year. LET ME LOVE YOU. AND I WILL LOVE YOU. AND I WILL LOVE YOU. AND I WILL LOVE YOU. AND . . . I guess he eventually then says “until you learn to love yourself” but it sounds like the whole song is just one line being repeated over and over again.

68 I Won't Give Up - Jason Mraz
I remember this song but I don’t remember having any particular feelings either way. It wasn’t my usual Jason Mraz song in that I only wanted to hear it when I was already happy and when I wasn’t it just pissed me off . . . it’s more like it just sort of faded into the background unnoticed?

69 Lego House - Ed Sheeran
I remember this but never had any particular feelings about it.

70 Here's To Never Growing Up - Avril Lavigne
Avril Lavigne still does stuff? I did not hear this.

71 Kiss You - One Direction
I don’t remember hearing this. It just sounds like One Direction. *Shrug.*

72 Counting Stars – OneRepublic
I think this has been much bigger in 2014 and I don’t know if I would have had much to say about it in December, but I do like it well enough now. It’s catchy. (Although the message of giving up on chasing fame and watching money burn never seems quite as profound when you know it’s sung by people who are already filthy rich . . . ).

73 Still Into You – Paramore
I didn’t hear this much but I liked it well enough. I do really like Hayley Williams’ voice.

74 Brave - Sara Bareilles
It makes me sad this is so much lower on the list compared to Roar, when it’s basically a much better version of the same song. It actually has original lyrics instead of smatterings of lines borrowed from other songs! I quite liked it.

75 Sweater Weather - The Neighbourhood
I feel like half the reason this song was so popular was that people were just discovering it in late summer when they were starting to get in the mood for fall, and everybody from YouTube fashion gurus to Bath and Body Works was capitalizing on the “Sweater Weather” catchphrase, lol.

I liked it well enough, though it did get pretty overplayed at one point. I also have a probably totally off-base theory that this song is about how much it sucks to live in California (and he’s only there because his hipster girlfriend wants to be). He hates the beach but he’s there anyway, and he keeps assuring his girlfriend that they can go someplace colder and he’ll keep her warm, it’ll be fine. There’s also a part of the video where they show an upside-down house which clearly references the upside-down property values of property in California :P

76 Let Her Go – Passenger
I was meh about this song in actual 2013 but liked it a lot in the immediate aftermath of my breakup in 2014 >.<

77 Everything Has Changed - Taylor Swift
Another I remember but never felt strongly about. The video is making me laugh, though; it’s so cheesy-romantic it would seem trite if it were teenagers or adults but that it’s two prepubescent kids makes it frankly weird. (This 8-year-old boy is reading the fucking Notebook? Lmao!). There’s aww-kid-crush and then there’s just straight-up projection fantasies . . .

78 Take Back The Night - Justin Timberlake
I don’t have much to say about this song except it’s weird the title shares the name of a widespread anti-rape protest and I don’t think that’s what the song is about?

79 Wild Ones feat. Sia - Flo Rida
I remember this from last year, it was okay.

80 Drive By – Train
Another from last year. I still maintain this song is about killing someone.

81 True Love feat. Lily Allen - P!nk
Both Lily Allen and P!nk have a similar cheeky, playful style about them so I liked the combination of the two of them together. I don’t remember hearing this a lot but I liked it when it was on.

82 Give It 2 U feat. Kenrick Lamar - Robin Thicke
The only Robin Thicke I remember is Blurred Lines and that was enough for one year.

83 Right Now – Rihanna
I remember this, never had much in the way of thoughts on it. Consider how low it is on the search results already it seems like most of the world has already forgot about it, too.

84 Slow Down - Selena Gomez
I don’t remember this, but it’s a minor key so it’s catchy to me.

85 Turn The Night Up - Enrique Iglesias
I don’t remember this at all.

86 Closer - Tegan & Sara
I don’t remember this but it’s catchy.

87 Gorilla - Bruno Mars
I didn’t hear this song on the radio, but only encountered it as a review by Todd in the Shadows, who amusingly pointed out just how ridiculous it is. Making love like gorillas really doesn’t sound all that appealing actually . . .

88 Work B**ch - Britney Spears
EVERYONE WAS TALKING ABOUT THIS ONLINE. And I don’t think I ever heard it once on the radio.

89 Chloe (You're The One I Want) - Emblem3
I don’t remember this at all.

90 White Walls feat. ScHoolboy Q and Hollis - Macklemore & Ryan Lewis
Did not hear this at all.

91 The A Team - Ed Sheeran
Remember this from last year, same thoughts.

92 #Beautiful feat. Miguel - Mariah Carey
No @ this hashtag nonsense.

93 Harlem Shake – Baauer
Lol I never heard this on the radio and was only familiar with it as the Internet meme. But I’m glad it made the list to preserve the meme in 2013 posterity XD

My favorite is still:

94 Berzerk – Eminem
Don’t remember this.

95 Fine China - Chris Brown
Not even going to dignify this artist with a single hit to his VEVO account.

96 Crooked Smile feat. TLC - J. Cole
I never heard this but I just watched the video and O.o

97 Beat It - Sean Kingston
I don’t remember this at all.

98 Little Things One Direction
More standard One Direction.

99 Crazy Kids - Ke$ha
I didn’t realize Ke$ha had done anything this year until Tory played me Timber upon picking me up from the airport before Christmas. I don’t know what this song is, but Timber is pretty hilarious.

100 People Like Us - Kelly Clarkson
Don’t remember at all.

List taken from: Z100's Top Songs of 2013

Previous years: 2012 2011 2010 2009 2008 2007

Robert Birthday Massacre Video

tabular_rasa — Tue, 26 Mar 2013 02:30:13 GMT

If you want to see some of Robert's work (and do him an awesome favor!), check out this music video he made for a contest, using one of The Birthday Massacre's songs off their new album:

"Like" the video to vote for him.

Top 100 Songs of 2012

tabular_rasa — Sat, 02 Feb 2013 23:24:50 GMT

Read 100-51 here.

50 Flo Rida - Whistle
Spoiler alert! This song is actually about a blowjob.

Damn this song and its insipid whistling that gets stuck in your head for days . . .

49 Outasight - Tonight Is The Night
Eh, this song was mostly annoying. He has a very lazy voice.

48 Ed Sheeran - The A Team
Oh so THAT’s what this song is called . . . I figured it was called It’s Too Cold Outside (For Angels to Fly) or something. I guess that explains why they say “she’s in the A-team” in the song—though I still have no freaking clue what that means. Anyway, I didn’t hear it a ton-- very much surprised it is in the Top 50-- but I did like it. Lyrically it’s freaking depressing-- watching a girl waste away from drug addiction and the horrible circumstances it puts her in--but I like having something a little sadder and soulful mixed in with all the upbeat pop.

47 Justin Bieber - Boyfriend
Haha I don’t think I ever heard the real song, but I thoroughly enjoyed the overly attached girlfriend version.

Also, my sister totally makes that creepy face. She and this girl have a lot of facial expressions in common, actually . . .

46 Train - Drive By
So remember in 50 Ways To Say Goodbye when Train was telling everybody the terrible ways his girlfriend died? Now he’s talking about drive bys and needing a two-ply Hefty bag to hold his love. Hmm. Maybe he wasn’t lying.

45 Calvin Harris ft Ne-Yo - Let's Go
Don’t think I ever heard this, but it’s not too bad, though also not particularly special. Also, oh hai Japan.

44 Gym Class Heroes ft. Neon Hitc... - Ass Back Home
I remember this. Didn’t love, but not terrible.

43 Karmin - Brokenhearted
Lol the song that goes “Cheerio!” in it. That’s all I really remember. I do like this better than her other hit on this list, though. I usually let it play through when it came on.

42 B.o.B. ft Taylor Swift - Both Of Us
I don’t remembering hearing this, but it’s not too bad actually. Kind of an odd combination, though . . .

41 Jessie J - Domino
Commented on this last year, don't feel any less meh about it.

40 Adele - Rumor Has It
Not my favorite Adele song, but I love Adele so even my meh songs from her top most things on this list; she basically can do no wrong in my book, lol. And she does do so well with *bitter.*

I do wish Skyfall would have ranked, though. I thought Skyfall was an awesome song in general and pretty much the perfect Bond song, with the sultry ‘60s-throwback vocals and the Bond theme incorporated into the background.

39 Drake ft Rihanna - Take Care
This song is so subtle I think it usually just played out under my radar in the background. It’s not bad or anything, just didn’t draw my attention, so I don’t have much to say about it.

38 Calvin Harris - Feel So Close
The little electronic melody thingy that played after the verses just made me think of etudes, like the little practice exercises for violin. Like I can literally see the notes printed on the page to practice changing between a constant note on one string and changing note on another . . . And yeah, that’s pretty much what I thought about anytime I heard this song, and that’s about it.

37 Rihanna – Diamonds
This song freaking exploded in the end of the year. I don’t think I started hearing it until November and December and then suddenly it was on the radio like 12 times a day. The impression I get of this song is I would have loved it when I was in late elementary school and had a much higher tolerance for repeated “exotic”-sounding minor phrases like this song delivers, but it wore out its welcome on me almost instantaneously after a couple days at work when I was hearing it literally once an hour.

36 Bruno Mars - Locked Out Of Heaven
I just looked up the lyrics and apparently this is just about sex so transcendantly mindblowing he uses heaven and church metaphors for it, but every time I heard it this year all I remember hearing was the repetitive “You make me feel like I’ve been locked out of heaven,” so I was under the assumption it was some whiny Friend Zone shit. What a relief!

Bruno Mars, I do have to say though, you are more than a little drama queen. Sex is *heaven*! Devotion is *catching a grenade*! A breakup is *suicide*! You’d think a guy who spends so much time relaxing would be a little more chill.

35 Alex Clare - Too Close
Feels. Like. I. Am. Just. Too. Close. To. Love. You WUMP WUMP WUMP WUMP WUMP WUMP WUMP WUMP WUMP WUMP.

. . . is pretty much how this song goes, with the heavy bass/dubstep/whatever. Though I guess I don’t hate dubstep as much as everybody else, because I didn’t mind. I liked this song during the summer until it started to fall victim to severe overplay and I had to take a break from it (ie: started to switch the channel on it when it came on), but now that it’s popularity has tapered off again I’m fine with it again.

Though I’m also not entirely sure what it’s about. Like Locked Out of Heaven, at first I thought it was about the Friend Zone and needing to put some space between himself and his best friend before he falls too dangerously hard for her (or him? I guess the song never specifies a pronoun), but I guess it’s actually about wanting to end an established romance because he’s *getting in too deep* and it makes him uncomfortable. Which-- there are so many songs about this subject, and I completely and utterly do not and have never related to it. Is commitmentphobia really so rampant? Is everybody else really struggling with so many relationships they want to keep at arm’s length to preserve some illusion of independence and emotional self-sufficiency? (Because you can’t be independent and emotionally self-sufficient in a relationship, of course). Or was I always just too Forever Alone to feel anything but bliss when I detected a mutual romance developing between myself and another person?

Also, seems like a bit of an overly dramatic presentation for a song essentially saying, “I don’t feel ready to commit to you yet.” Maybe he and Bruno Mars should hang out.

34 Usher - Scream
Usher and his one-word titles! Usually then this happens, I like the song, and I guess I liked this one alright. Not my all-time favorite or anything, but enjoyable enough. Usher somehow manages to bring intensity to his party songs. Maybe they’re over the top in that way, but I dunno, they make me feel more invested than somebody with a lazy voice masturbating about how much of a great time they’re having.

33 Katy Perry - Part Of Me
This song usually flew under my radar when it was on, but the few times I acknowledged its presence I thought it was pretty good.

32 Ke$ha - Die Young
Whew, only one Ke$ha song this year! She was late to the OMG WE’RE GONNA DIE SO LET’S PARTY wagon, and yet she was the only one who got the timing right for 2012.

31 Neon Trees - Everybody Talks
FUCK.
THIS.
SONG.
Holy crap.

I didn’t like this song from the beginning, as soon as I could make out the scenario the song is describing. The lyrics are rife with the usual cliché love = drugs and addiction metaphor and don’t have much of a cohesive narrative, but essentially this guy is in a relationship and everybody is talking about it, which is causing a problem. So either he’s A-list celebrity or royalty (so relatable!), a character on Gossip Girl, or a preteen stuck in that solipsistic stage where you are certain every single person in your school has noticed your latest zit and think the President probably reads your Twitter. You can bet which one my money’s on.

Also, somehow this girl “made his lips hurt.” What does that even mean?? She bit him? She has herpes? The fuck?

So it was annoying enough the first 8000 times around.

But then after constant airplay for several months, the insipid lyrics gratefully disappeared—and were replaced with a constant drone of whiny indie-hipster-douche “eyyyyyyyyyyyyyy” noises:
It started with a whispeeeeeeeeyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
And that was when I keeeeeyyyyyyyyyy heeyyyyyyyyyyyy
And then she made meeeyyyyyy lips heeeeyyyyyyyy

Robert and I have actually sent each other texts like, “Fuck, the eeeeeeyyyyyyyyy song is on right now kill me now” and we both instantly know what the other is talking about.
Worst song of the year IMO, and Ke$ha was on the charts. Damn, Neon Trees.

30 David Guetta ft Usher - Without You
Not my favorite, but not bad. It’s Usher in a minor key which I usually like.

29 Taylor Swift - We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together
The first time I heard this song was on my way to work and initially I thought it was Hayley whatsherface from Paramore, Avril Lavigne, or maybe one of those numerous preteen talk-instead-of-sing Disney products. I got to work and pulled up Twitter and Taylor Swift was trending, and figured out I had been mistaken. It’s such a departure from her usual sound and I’m not sure how I feel about it. I don’t particularly like the sound-- the sort of contrived, almost valley girl way she sings and performs the talking interludes-- but on the other hand, opening up to experimentation is a good thing, and I do like that she’s got a sort of self-aware sense of humor to the lyrics (it’s pretty clear they will in fact get back together, lol), which sort of reminds me of P!nk.

28 Pitbull ft Chris Brown - International Love
Oh god what a combination. Thank goodness looking at the title I have no recollection for how this song goes, so I guess at least it wasn’t memorably annoying.

Though the Internet informs me that lyrically, this song is kind of like California Girls for Miami. Hear that, Lebanese and Greek bitches? Ya ain’t got nothing on MIAMI!

27 Owl City & Carly Rae Jepsen - Good Time
This song was Owl City and Calry Rae Jepsen? Lol, I definitely heard the song plenty of times but had no idea it was them until now. I liked it, though, it was like the good-times song for the year for m the way Black-Eyed Pea's I Gotta Feeling was for 2010. I also enjoy how the video has them camping, subverting the otherwise cliche going-out theme. But hey-- they don't even have to try, it's always a good time!

26 Phillip Phillips - Home
Another one for the folksy sound that had a revival this year. I liked it.

25 Chris Brown - Don't Wake Me Up
Again . . . I don’t think I heard this until December. Why is it #25? Was this popular really early in the year when I wasn’t listening to the radio and then banned from the airwaves until voting time? I do not understand!

Also, again, FUCK CHRIS BROWN.

24 Jason Mraz - I Won't Give Up
This was just kind of slow and too contrived, I didn’t really buy it as genuine tenderness. It just came off like Jason Mraz doing his “heartfelt” shtick.

23 Justin Bieber ft. Big Sean - As Long As You Love Me
Justin, I know you are this generation’s pretty boy heartthrob pop phenomenon, but you really didn’t have to go so far as to steal track names from my generation’s boy bands.

Though at least you’re not as bad as One Direction in that regard . . .

22 Adele - Set Fire To The Rain
I commented on this one last year, how the first time I heard it Tory wiped her hand on my face at the part where she says “watched it burn as I touched your face,” which cracked me up. Again, I like Adele, and I liked this song.

21 David Guetta ft Nicki Minaj - Turn Me On
I’m still amused by anything “David Guetta featuring . . . “ I’m sure it’s all based on contracts and he must have a majority input on the track or something, but considering I have no idea what this man looks or sounds like it’s really hard for me to think of these songs as anything other than the creation of featured artist . . .

But anyway, another catchy, repetitive Nicki Minaj hit that I enjoyed enough on the radio but never blew me away and I probably won’t remember it come this time next year.

20 Katy Perry - Wide Awake
I remember this being very popular just as I was starting work and then fading out for the rest of the year. I never particularly cared for it, but I didn’t mind it, either.

19 Flo Rida - Good Feeling
I think I like the straight-up Levels better (the Etta James sample is by far the best part of the song), but as far as Flo Rida songs go, this was pretty enjoyable, mostly because of the sample.

18 Maroon 5 - One More Night
I’ve talked before about how I usually like every other Maroon 5 hit. I thought this one was okay. I dunno, I think they’re most in their element when they’re pissed off, lol.

17 Ne-Yo - Let Me Love You
LET ME LOVE YOU AND I WILL LOVE YOU AND I WILL LOVE YOU AND I WILL LOVE YOU SO LET ME LOVE YOU
I know that’s not what he’s saying-- I think he’s saying “Let me love you, and I will love you until you learn to love yourself” or something-- but that’s all I hear when I hear this song. It got kind of tedious.

16 Ellie Goulding - Lights
I quite liked this song; it had a nice energy, understated but still driving.

15 Rihanna - Where Have You Been
Meh. Again, the Rihanna songs all just sort of flowed into each other . . .

14 Fun. - Some Nights
Lyrically, this was one of my favorite songs of the year, because I think it speaks pretty well to the sort of existential crisis that myself and many other people I know have been going through as twentysomethings trying to find our place in a particularly difficult time to do so. Of course it’s overdramatic in likening a quarter-life crisis to war and martyrs, but at the end of the day I think it’s refreshing to have songs on the radio that are about a struggle of personal identity rather than relationships or the pursuit of sex or success. But of course that’s probably my introverted intuition talking . . .

I also liked the video a lot. How appropriate for the year of the Les Mis movie, to feature another revolution.

13 Pink - Blow Me One Last Kiss
I like Pink, but this is not my favorite. I almost feel like there was supposed to be some joke in the title line, like “Blow me . . . one last kiss” so it’s like she’s yelling to “blow me!” first, but it didn’t end up coming out that way. Wasted opportunity?

12 Nicki Minaj - Starships
I liked this song way more than I have any justification for, lol. I didn’t seek it out, but any time it came on I inevitably ended up singing along, and it was good for dancing to at weddings. I guess it just hit some catchy pop sweet spot without wearing out its welcome, at least as far as I heard it.

11 One Direction - What Makes You Beautiful
I defer to Colbert’s analysis:

10 Rihanna ft Calvin Harris - We Found Love
Honestly, I think I forgot that We Found Love and Where Have You Been were too different songs until I read this list . . .

9 The Wanted - Glad You Came
This didn’t blow me away but it was catchy and fun, I liked it well enough.

8 Flo Rida ft Sia - Wild Ones
The usual Flo Rida review: I liked the sample but was meh on the entire song.

7 Gotye - Somebody That I Used To Know

I really enjoyed this song when it was popular over the summer and I never got sick of it—probably because I guess everyone did and its airplay dropped considerably come fall >.< The sound was so different from the pop hits preceding it and it just didn’t work as like a hip hop or dance remix, which was honestly kind of great, lol. I especially enjoyed the two voice conflicting narratives of the dissolution of a relationship, which reminded me a bit of Postal Service’s Nothing Better.

Though I think I may have enjoyed the Star Wars parody even better than the actual song, lol:

6 Kelly Clarkson - Stronger
I liked Dark Side better, probably because of the minor key. I think I just wasn't in a place in my life for this song to speak to me thematically and otherwise it just wasn't great enough to really capture my attention.

5 Fun. ft Janelle Monae - We Are Young
Also a favorite from over the summer. This is one of those songs that sounded familiar to me before I’d ever heard it, which is generally a good sign. Another example of *something different*-- indie meets the sort of bombasticness of an '80s hair band or something. I enjoyed singing along and it was really easy to harmonize with, given he sings all the notes of the chord any time he holds a sustained syllable . . .

4 Carly Rae Jepsen - Call Me Maybe
I’m surprised this isn’t even higher on the list, lol-- and it's #4! This song reached some kind of pop nirvana, some perfect recipe to appeal to the human pleasure centers, or something. Even if you hated it, you couldn't help but sing along! So despite its flaws and overplay, I don't begrudge it its success at all. I'm sure 50 years from now if it comes on I'll be immediately singing along.

3 Maroon 5 ft Wiz Khalifa - Payphone
Oh hey, another song about phones. But it was the Maroon 5 song I was not destined to like this year.

2 Demi Lovato - Give Your Heart A Break
Really? I didn’t despise this song or anything, but I was negative to neutral. People loved this so intensely it’s #2? Um, okay . . .

1 David Guetta ft Sia - Titanium
Oh David Guetta . . . While electronic hits have been working their way higher and higher up the charts, I was a little surprised to see this one at #1. But I liked this song; I liked the intensifying energy and almost inspirational sound, and I liked the anti-bully message (in contract to the much more ubiquitous anti-cruel lover).

List taken from: Z100's Top Songs of 2012

Previous years: 2011 2010 2009 2008 2007

Top 100 Songs of 2012

tabular_rasa — Sat, 02 Feb 2013 23:04:51 GMT

So finally I'm getting up my annual Top 100 Pop Songs list! I don't know if anybody waits with baited breath for these or anything, but I enjoy doing them as a sort of for-posterity thing.

Anyway, after two years of nonstop In Da Club Dancing Until The World Ends hyper-sampled party hits, I thought the music of 2012 was really refreshing. With my daily commute (in a van that doesn’t have satellite radio or an ipod hookup) and employment in a job that kept music on in the background, this year was the first since 2009 that I’d spend a substantial amount of time captive to the radio, and I was impressed with how tolerable the music was

. . . but then I read this list and realized that just because I’ve been listening to stations that play music released in the past year doesn’t mean I’ve listening to a pop station.

I mean, who knew? I grew up in a town where the options were Pop, Oldies, Classic Rock, Country, and the Mom Station*. (Indie hits? New rock? On the radio? The fuck is this shit? What is this alien place?).

*Mom Station: adult contemporary rock and inoffensive pop hits with no rap and minimal profanity, generally featuring the Delilah program in the evening. THERE IS ALWAYS A MOM STATION IN THE MIDWEST.

So while I was listening to Macklemore, Mumford & Sons, Of Monsters and Men, M83, AWOLnation, and Rise Against, and thinking pop had suddenly gotten miraculously really different and awesome, I apparently just had my dialed tuned to the wrong place >.<

This list was also surprising to me in some ways I think because people in the greater New York area (I use the list published by the Z100 station out of NYC) don’t listen to the same exact music as people in the greater LA. I’m surprised by how many of the songs I just straight-up didn’t hear—and I know I was listening to legitimate pop stations often enough I should have. However, I’ve used Z100’s list since I started doing this in 2007, so I kept with my tradition and used it this year. If I still don’t recognize half the stuff for next year, maybe I’ll switch to Billboard’s Top 100 or something instead, but for this year . . . well, I had already starting writing my responses to this one before I thought to look up the Billboard chart or a local LA station.

Even once I worked through this list, though, I think 2012 was better and refreshingly different than the two years previous. There was still plenty of the same crap, but there were a lot of novel gems and some genuinely talented artists landing big hits.

As always, a disclaimer that these are my personal opinion and you are welcome to disagree and express your disagreement, without getting into generalized attacks of taste. So without further ado (and in two parts, because these are massive), my thoughts on the Top 100 Songs of 2012.

100 Lumineers - Ho Hey
Now this was the kind of thing I was hearing this year that made me feel like 2012 was different and interesting. Stuff a little off the well-trodden path of pounding electronic dance with autotuned vocals or rap relying o-- something catchy and cute enough to be pop, but also a little folksy and just . . . different.

With this song on the list, I’m kind of surprised to see that neither Of Monsters and Men’s Little Talks* nor Mumford & Sons’ I Will Wait didn’t, since I thought they got about the same amount of airplay. (Frankly I think Little Talks got much MORE airplay). But maybe they were #101 and #102 or something . . . or, again, I just listen to the wrong stations.

Which, geek moment, I associate with Simon and River Tam because I watched Firefly* for the first time this year, and the way this song features a male voice comforting a female one that speaks of insanity and “voices in her head,” plus the bit about how “this ship will carry our bodies safe to shore”-- stowaways on Serenity much? I think it totally fits (:

99 Cher Lloyd ft. Becky G. - Oath
From what I’ve heard of her (which is graciously little), I find Cher Lloyd pretty obnoxious, what with the teenage-talk singing style and snotty affectation she puts on in her music videos. I didn’t ever actually hear this song this year, but upon listening to it it at least seems slightly* better than her other hit this year, probably because it’s actually nice (about being friends forever) rather than bitchy, manipulative, and confused.

*But only slightly. Her voice is no different, she has no remorse for crashing her friend’s dad’s new car, and is weirdly hypersexual in a video ostensibly about high school friendship.

98 Gym Class Heroes/Adam Levine - Stereo Hearts
This was on the last year, and I think it grew on me this year. It was just sweet and peppy, and I didn’t get sick of it.

97 Onerepublic - Feel Again
Okay, I guess I remember hearing this this year? Not particularly often, though, and not enough to have strong feeling about it. It’s not bad I guess. Eh.

96 Lady Gaga - Marry The Night
Another recurrence from last year. Is this really the only Lady Gaga song on the list? In fairness, I’m pretty sure that woman needs a break. But as I said last year I wasn’t big on her latest album in general and wasn’t big on this song.

95 Imagine Dragons - Its Time
Oh, this is the song with the plunky strings and the bit about rainchecks, lol. The lyrics make exactly zero sense, but I thought it was different and catchy and I enjoyed it, though not enough to look up the title ever, lol.

I do have to say, though, that this song sounds an awful lot like Believe It Or Not.

Also:

94 J. Cole - Work Out
And now the song that samples Paula Abdul. That’s all this song was to me, I didn’t really pay attention to the rest.

93 The Fray – Heartbeat
I don’t remember hearing this song. It sounds Fray-ish, doesn’t really jump out at me as anything special.

92 Rihanna - You Da One
Was it last year every other song was by Katy Perry? This year, every other song was Rihanna. Eventually they all just sort of flowed together into one repetitive pop hit. This one was distinguished from the others by sounding a little bit like a children’s playground song or something at the beginning.

91 K'Naan / Nelly Furtado - Is Anybody Out There?
Definitely never heard this. I haven’t heard from Nelly Furtado in a while . . . and K’Naan did the World Cup song, right? I wonder how they came to collaborate?

My impression of the lyrics at first glance is that the song is kind of about codependence-- I mean, feeling incomplete until you find the person that completes you. It’s not hitting any particular sweet spots with me musically, so I think I’m okay I didn’t hear it this year.

90 Karmin- Hello
I don’t think I heard this, either. The chorus has that kind of electronic + minor key thing going on that rubs some pop sweet spot for me, but the rapped verses (once again, that ubiquitous whiny-talk girl voice-- WHY is that selling?) just feel done.

89 Breathe Carolina - Blackout
Ha, I remember hearing this song for the first time and getting a very vivid image in my head of some skinny hipster college freshman ordering multiple rounds of shots and insisting “I’m only getting started; I won’t blackout!” as he starts to buckle and sway and gulp back vomit.

And I really can’t make heads or tails of the lyrics to determine if anything else other than this is in fact going on, so I’m gonna go with that.

88 One Direction - One Thing
Oh, One Direction. It is kinda cute to see a resurgence of boy bands, though I wish they didn’t rip off my generation’s so shamelessly. (Though in fairness, they dress way better). Like the Justin Bieber phenomenon, I honestly didn’t hear much of them on the radio despite hearing constantly about their popularity.

Listening to this song now, it just makes me laugh; “You’ve got that . . . one thing.” Maybe it would sound more sophisticated in French. But I guess that’s accurate for the teenage audience they speak to.

87 Usher – Numb
I don’t think I heard this. Not my favorite Usher song; as much as I get sick of their ubiquity, I tend to like Usher best on dance hits. He does them well.

86 Linkin Park - Burn It Down
Linkin Park’s been going steadily downhill for a while. I just found this kind of tedious.

85 LMFAO - Sexy & I Know It
Bleh, go away LMFAO.

84 The Wanted - Chasing The Sun
I don’t think I heard this, but the minor key danceability, while repetitive and nothing new, is okay. I’d probably get hella sick of it if I starting hearing it multiple times a day, though.

The video cracks me up, though. Yes, a little bit because they’re “chasing the sun” but are vampires, but mostly because the whole thing seems to be unintentionally about STDs.

83 B.O.B. - So Good
While I find the message a little bit arrogant-- hey, I’m rich and successful and I’m gonna treat you to all this shit I know you never would have had otherwise (kind of like TI’s Whatever You Like)-- I thought the music itself was fun.

82 Dev - In The Dark
Another repeat from last year’s list. I don’t remember hearing it at all this year, honestly.

81 Katy Perry - The One That Got Away
I liked this song the first time I heard it-- making my 2011 list-- but while I heard it more this year, I felt much more meh about it. I think I only like it in the context of the video.

80 Jennifer Lopez ft Pitbull - Dance Again
I don’t really remember hearing this song, but it’s okay. It seems very ‘80s to me somehow.

Every time Jennifer Lopez and Pitbull collaborate, I like Jennifer and try my best to ignore Pitbull. But the same could be said for Pitbull and any other artist he collaborates with, honestly.

79 Outasight - Now Or Never
Don’t remember this one. If I did hear it it must have just sounded too much like everything else on the radio at the time.

78 Wiz Khalifa & Snoop Dogg - Young, Wild & Free
Something about this song has always made me suspicious. It’s all, we’re just young people trying to have a good time! People get down on us-- but it’s totally innocent! It’s just what we do!

Well, no. Because here’s the thing: pretty much nobody actually fucking cares if young people are out and about having a good time . . . UNLESS THEIR GOOD TIME IS CAUSING A PROBLEM. So the fact that they have to be defensive about it means they were probably doing something that wasn’t just being young, wild, and free-- but perhaps noisy, rude, destructive, or even illegal, like partying into all hours of the morning next door to people who have to work early the next day, driving recklessly around town, loitering in public spaces making it difficult for other people to use them, or-- and they outright say they are doing this in the song-- using and distributing controlled substances. Since I first noticed this song around the time we were having problems with our very entitled and rude former neighbors, ever since I’ve just assumed Wiz and Snoop are actually assholes, who just think that normal society is *oppressing* them for not gladly giving them run of the place to do whatever the fuck antisocial (but fun for them!) shit they want to do, and I kind of want to period on their faces.

77 Rita Ora - How We Do Party
Okay yeah I remember this. Didn’t make an impression on me. I remember the bit about an avenue . . . that’s it.

76 Taylor Swift - Eyes Open
Man, Taylor Swift had a bunch of hits this year, too. I don’t think I heard this one on the radio at all, but it sounds a little more like *old* Taylor Swift than most of her other stuff this year, which I think I prefer, though lyrically this is one of those songs I think you can really only relate to if you’re famous. (Everybody’s watching and hoping you’ll fall on your face? Really?). Or a really solipsistic teenager, but in that case it’s just your perception and not actual reality.

75 Christina Aguilera - Your Body
Christina Aguilera had a hit this year? Huh. I’m just gonna ask the same thing I keep asking in regards to her: What happened to her whole classy retro jazz persona she had going on back in the mid-2000s? I really liked that, and the music she produced then. Now she just seems stuck in this sort of regressive Dirrrty trying to catch up with the age of Lady Gaga and Nicki Minaj (you can see it in her outfits and color scheme . . . ) and I’m not really feeling it.

74 Flo Rida - I Cry
Oh, the song with the muppet-y voice in it! Okay. I think that’s a lot of what this list is, finally hunting down the titles to all those songs I vaguely acknowledged in the background, lol.

Of course I didn’t pay any attention to the lyrics at all this year, but I just looked them up now and:
Can't let go I got fans in Okinawa
My heart to Japan quake losers and survivors
Norway no you didn't get my flowers
No way to sound better but the killer was a coward

Um . . . so you don’t have pity for the victims of the Norway shooting because the shooter was a coward? The fuck is that logic?

But other than that, same comment as every other Flo Rida song: catchy sample, nothing really to say about Flo Rida’s own contribution.

73 Olly Murs ft. Chiddy Bang - Heart Skips A Beat
Lol Chiddy Bang. Tory and I named a Sim Chiddy Bang. I don’t think I realized it was the name of an artist.

Didn’t hear this song this year but the video is kind of amusing me because the featured guy (Olly Murs?) actually seems to have a sense of humor and isn’t just posturing about how awesome he is.

72 Swedish House Mafia - Don't You Worry Child
Okay yup I do recognize this. But . . . no strong feelings. It was catchy, the religious overtones weren’t really to my taste, but . . . yeah, that’s really all I have to say.

71 Alicia Keys - Girl On Fire
Pretty sure the first time I heard this was in December 2012, so it surprises me it’s even on this list, but so far, it’s a pretty good song. Generally I appreciate Alicia Keys’ talent but don’t actually like that many of her charting songs; however, I do like this one so far as I’ve heard it.

70 Nicki Minaj - Va Va Voom
Heard this, didn’t really stick out from me, definitely heard better from Nicki Minaj.

69 Train - 50 Ways To Say Goodbye
I haven’t particularly liked a Train song since Drops of Jupiter a decade ago, but I enjoyed this one-- because it’s so hilariously and unexpectedly dark! In the song they don’t actually say “50 ways to say goodbye” but “50 ways to say you died”; the whole plot is that he’s too ashamed to admit to his friends his girlfriend dumped him, so he makes up (presumably) 50 wild stories about how she died in a terrible freak accident. (Meanwhile, I wonder if she used one of 50 Ways to Leave Your Lover to dump him in the first place :P). While sometimes Train’s weirdly specific references seem forced, I rather enjoyed them for this. ("Got run over by a crappy purple Scion"-- lol, poor Scion). And the video is kind of cute in that after relaying his sob story to all of these people, his girlfriend just walks up and says hi and everything is super awkward.

68 Pitbull - Back In Time
Oh man I forget MIB 3 came out this year until I saw this song on the list. I also forgot this song was on the list. Pitbull is just . . . lol, I’ve moved beyond hating him and more now he just cracks me up. He’s so freaking bad. And not like there’s any point even remarking on sample choices these days, but . . . really?

67 Bridgit Mendler - Ready Or Not
I don’t recall hearing this song, but upon hearing it, it’s unremarkable.

The video is interesting in that I’m cynically realizing that I get a lot less excited seeing people exploring familiar landmarks in LA than I do in, say, Kyoto or Saint Louis. Probably because EVERYTHING IS FILMED IN LA so it is not remotely special. I think the industry needs a change of scenery. Then Robert and I could go somewhere else, lol.

66 Jay Z & Kanye West - Ni**as In Paris
Oh hey, finally a song I genuinely liked! And the video has a seizure warning. That’s always fun.

This song was interesting because it doesn’t really have a melody or a chorus, just the little beat-hook thing going on on the background. But Jay-Z and Kanye’s battling voices creates enough compelling energy to carry the song, and I think that’s something. Though I like pretty much anything Jay-Z puts out these days.

Also, this is so much lolz.

65 Cher Lloyd - Want U Back
I thankfully heard this song only a handful of times. and really the only thing I remember from it is all the bizarre violent grunting and part at the end where she goes “Do a sound like a helicopter! Bbbbbbbbbb!”

Which is just . . . is that supposed to be *adorably quirky* or something? At least Ke$ha’s similar spoken “I like your beard” in Your Love is My Drug made sense as a (really dumb, probably stoned) conversation with the object of the song. This is just . . .

64 One Direction - Live While We're Young
Again, the only 1D song I really heard on the radio this year was What Makes You Beautiful. The ones I don’t know all just kind of sound the same.

63 Enrique Iglesias ft Sammy Adam... - Finally Found You
Enrique is very pretty but his voice is sooooo autotuned and I don’t remember this song.

62 Avicii - Levels
If I heard this at all, I probably just thought it was a remix of Flo Rida’s Good Feeling-- which, I mean, it seems to be given the same Etta James sample and beat. But the reality is, of course, that Flo Rida sampled Avicii’s sample; Avicii did it first.

But yeah, I can dig this-- it’s like all the good parts of the Flo Rida song without Flo Rida, lol.
And this would be an example of what I’m talking about with something *different* from 2012, though . . . non-lyrical stuff like this and Midnight City actually making play on the pop stations.

Also, the video is fairly cute.

61 Bruno Mars - It Will Rain
Oh yes, I remember this song from last year-- the one where he basically threatens to kill himself if she leaves him because that’s not abusive at all or anything. NEXT.

60 Grouplove - Tongue Tied
I thought this song was kind of annoying—just this repetitive sort of sing-song shouting.

The video is just like a kooky version of The Scientist-- but without the lip-syncing that made that video so genius.

59 PSY - Gangnam Style
Oh thank heavens this made it on the list! I knew it was charting in the US, but I was worried it might be disqualified from the list somehow. I can’t believe it’s not higher than this, but maybe Z100 was slow on the uptake or something.

But I fucking love Gangnam Style. I love the song, I love the video, I love the dance, I love the dance craze. No, I’m not tired of it yet.

58 Afrojack & Shermanology - Can't Stop Me
Don’t think I heard this one. The background sounds really close to the chorus of Yeah x3 so I just keep thinking it’s going to be that.

57 Nicki Minaj - Pound The Alarm
I can’t really justify why I like this song, I don’t think there’s anything special about it at all, but I did kind of like it. Catchy I guess? Without being completely annoying?

56 Kelly Clarkson - Dark Side
I was split about this song. Since they were in a minor key, I rather liked the sound of the verses, but then they just built up to a chorus that didn’t do much for me. Plus the lyrics were just kind of like early-teen angsty in not a particularly charming way. (Especially from a grown woman performer). Like, I dunno, I don’t think mature adults would need to exaggerate their flaws as like this secret villainous “dark side” they can only trust to reveal to certain special people. I think mature adults are just kind of like, “So, sometimes I can be kind of a bitch if I’ve had a long day or I’m on my period, I hope you can look past that and roll with it,” not “PROMISE YOU WILL STAY WITH ME EVEN WHEN I SHOW YOU MY *DARK SIDE*!!!!1”

55 Chris Brown - Turn Up The Music
Go away, Chris Brown.

54 Gym Class Heroes ft Ryan Tedde... - The Fighter
I don’t remember hearing this one.

53 Havana Brown ft Pitbull - We Run The Night
I like the chorus of this song alright . . . The rest is kind of forgettable and just . . . too much Pitbull.

52 Gavin DeGraw - Not Over You
This song was on the list last year, I think I like it less than I did before . . . his voice is just really annoying.

51 Selena Gomez & The Scene - Love You Like A Love Song
This song is really trite with badly metaphorical lyrics, but it also comes out and accepts that (“it’s been said and done; every beautiful thought’s been already sung, but I guess here now’s another one . . . “). Her voice is also weirdly robotic, but again, I guess it’s intentional because of the record-skipping repeat-peat-peat-peat-peat bit. It is a minor key, though, so it could be worse.
The most interesting thing about this song to me is the video, in which they are ostensibly in Japan but there’s a lady in a Chinese dress (not worn in Japan, at least not traditionally), an MC speaking Japanese with a terrible accent, and no one in the entire room seems a day less than 10 years older than Selena. (Why are they all at karaoke place together?). The parody of cheesy and bizarre karaoke videos is pretty spot on, though.

Continue to 50-1.