Werd

sourpatchkid @ 2006-06-02T14:52:00

2006-06-02T19:52:33Z

I have registered to play in the PokerStars World Blogger Championship of Online Poker!

This Online Poker Tournament is a No Limit Texas Holdem event exclusive to Bloggers.

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Registration code: 2794657

sourpatchkid @ 2005-09-30T04:10:00

2005-09-30T09:11:08Z

I have registered to play in the
Online Poker Blogger Championship!

This event is powered by PokerStars.

Registration code: 6337863

sourpatchkid @ 2005-09-13T23:25:00

2005-09-14T04:26:22Z

Embrace the contraction

you + are = YOU'RE

sourpatchkid @ 2005-05-02T19:03:00

2005-05-03T00:55:42Z

Analysis of Kansas City Radio
By: Drew Smith

I have recently been forced to subdue myself to the tortureous sounds of FM radio because I bought a new car that does not YET have a CD player. I own over 200 CDs and would only rarely tune into the radio if I wanted to listen to a Royals game or scoff at Rush Limbaugh in my previous drewmobile. Who knew that upgrading cars would be such a painful experience?

I. Mix 93.3 FM - pure shit. Everything that I don't like about music is spoon fed to me in brain numming sounds waves produced by this radio station.

    Exhibit A: www.britneyspears.com - just...no.

    Exhibit B: www.usherworld.com - same song - same CD everytime.

      A. Conclusion - screw these dickheads.

II. KSMO 94.9 FM - why change something that already works? You might remember this once glorius radio station as Oldies 95, but now Bush is in the White House and consequently everything else in the world must suck a little bit whether he has something to do with it or not. The radio station's format is still close to the same, but the slight change makes me think someone is giving the guy below the guy in charge one big wedgie because his BMW needs new rims.

    Exhibit A: thebeachboys.com - still got it.

    Exhibit B: www.steppenwolf.com - all I need is 169 HW and Magin Carpet Ride.

      A. Conclusion - definitely still rock-out-able.

III. The Buzz 96.5 FM - Lazlo is kind of funny sometimes but also seems like that dude you knew in school that would do whatever it took to get your attention. I'd probably have a beer with him if I drank beer, but I don't so I won't. Yeah. Famous for the 90's at noon segment and infamous for crappy pretentious European bands that hog airplay. They play Sublime and RHCP a lot so I'll throw them a couple of bones. Every now and again I'll turn on Loveline at 10 p.m. because of DR. DREW. The look of Dr. in front of my name just looks sweet.

    Exhibit A: www.saddle-creek.com/bands/brighteyes - screw this dude.

    Exhibit B: www.hothotheat.com/ - CANTanadians.

      A. Conclusion - absolutely a last resort unless it's 12-1 p.m.

IV. KY 99.7 FM - this is almost the stuff. About 75% righteous but not quite perfected. You'll be rockin out to some Foghat and they throw in some Journey or STYX or Rush. It's like a huge bag of Doritos that you devour 75% of only to find the remaining 25% are all crunched up into microscopic little triangles that you have to grab with a freaking pair of tweezers. At least the bag is 3/4's full.

    Exhibit A: www.journeymusic.com/ - oops I just took a crap, oh wait no it was "Lights".

    Exhibit C: www.doobiebros.com/ - totally underrated and completely awesome.

      A. Conclusion - righteous radio station.

V. KCFX The Fox 101.1 FM - this is the station that is like the Christmas present that you didn't see under the tree and you open around January 15th. You'll probably unwrap some socks or a jock strap but it still leaves you with that awesome feeling of "fuck yeah".

    Exhibit A: www.led-zeppelin.com/ - gods.

    Exhibit B: www.allmanbrothersband.com/ - duane and dickey...duane and dickey.

      A. Conclusion - puts the awesome in "this radio station is awesome".

101.1 The Fox is the way to go and 99.7 KY is a not too close runner-up. Those are the only stations I listen to and if they're both on commercial breaks then I sing that awesome Nationalllllll Mortage Company jingle. You know the one!

Bibliography

1. 101.1 The Fox, Sesquahana, MO.
2. 99.7 KY, Kansas City, MO.
3. The rest don't matter

Peace out.

Why?

2005-04-28T04:13:45Z

sourpatchkid @ 2005-02-21T05:02:00

2005-02-21T11:06:32Z

Up at five this morning with three finals today. I'll eat an orange and down a grande hot chocolate for sure. Gotta keep the 4.0 and then tomorrow I can use these textbooks for bookends.

sourpatchkid @ 2005-02-18T14:27:00

2005-02-18T20:29:38Z

There are certain undeniable truths in this world, and in the words of a washed up crack addict: life is for free, take it from me boy.

sourpatchkid @ 2005-02-02T19:33:00

2005-02-03T01:48:52Z

Driving Complaints and Grievances
By Drew Smith

If you are over 50, don't drive a truck, SUV, Winnebago, or anything with a big engine that you'll never use. In fact, just don't drive.

If you like nascar, wrestling, muddin', wheat beer, etc. that does not mean you HAVE to drive a truck. Specifically a god damn F150-F950 or however many intervals of 150 that shit goes up to. AND YOU DON'T HAVE TO BACK IN TO EVERY PARKING SPOT.

If you are going to change lanes you HAVE to signal (it's a law) while simultaneously making sure there is adequate room for your car to NOT CUT ME OFF LADY IN THE BLUE CAR THIS MORNING. IF I DIDN'T HAVE CLASS THIS MORNING I WOULD HAVE FOLLOWED YOU TO WHEREVER YOU WERE GOING AND KARATE CHOPPED YOU IN THE TEMPLE. DIE.

Having a jesus fish is like saying, "Please egg my car, or cut me off, or run me off the road, etc." I brake for Jesus bumper stickers are ok though you witty little boogers.

Don't get in front of me and then slow down to exactly the speed limit. If you do find the need to get in front of me, go faster than me.

EXCEPTIONS

If you're rockin out to a sweet song then you're alright with me.

sourpatchkid @ 2004-11-04T19:56:00

2004-11-04T17:59:51Z

Kerry had bad strategary.

sourpatchkid @ 2004-11-02T06:45:00

2004-11-02T04:44:49Z

I VOTED FOR A DUDE WHOSE NAME RHYMES WITH BERRY

sourpatchkid @ 2004-10-22T21:28:00

2004-10-22T19:30:07Z

A sale at the GAP, a sale at Old Navy, some new sweaters for winter and a really really fly honey on my arm made for a sweet day. And my dog Z had seven tiny babies, which only three are spoken for (wink)!

sourpatchkid @ 2004-10-19T01:23:00

2004-10-18T23:25:08Z

why?

sourpatchkid @ 2004-10-04T23:09:00

2004-10-04T21:08:51Z

Go Chiefs!

sourpatchkid @ 2004-09-19T03:06:00

2004-09-19T01:21:01Z

Tonight is one of those nights that I probably could have slept, but I didn't. No I'm not going to write about my day. I don't know anyone who doesn't like Jimi Hendrix which is good because I am his reincarnation. It's pretty sweet I know but I won't sign any autographs and if I do, I'll sign them as Drew Smith and not Hendrix. I got a new pimple today -- what's up buddy? Anybody but Bush or Kerry in 04!! I'd rather vote for Gore than Kerry, and Bush should drive into the Pacific Ocean. He'd drown because he wouldn't know how to unlock the doors and I don't give him enough credit to know how to swim. I miss my girl. boo hoo hoo =(

sourpatchkid @ 2004-09-05T00:30:00

2004-09-04T22:32:55Z

This is a picture that a nasa satellite took of the hurricane in FL...

http://www.nasa.gov/images/content/64378main_modis_full.jpg

It's so nice I wanna hear the same song twiceeeee

2004-08-11T14:54:17Z

It's been close to 80 degrees for most of the past week and everybody is rollin down the highway with the AC on. What's up with that? Now it's like 68 degrees and everyone has their windows up!

My arm is out the window with my tunes blaring.

sourpatchkid @ 2004-07-31T23:56:00

2004-07-31T21:59:28Z

can't sleep

Rocky IV

cheesy lyric post.....

Gone - Jack Johnson

(E - G# - C#m - A)
Well look at all those fancy clothes
but these could keep us warm just like those
and what about your soul? is it cold?
(F#m - B)
is it straight from the mold and ready to be sold?

(E - G# - C#m - A)
...and cars and phones and diamond rings, bling bling
those are only removable things
and what about your mind does it shine or
(F#m - B)
are there things that concern you more than your time

(E - B - C#m - A)
gone, going, gone everything gone give a damn
gone be the birds when they don't wanna sing
gone people all awkward with their things, gone.

Intro (E - C#m)

Verse2:
(E - G# - C#m - A)
look at you out to make a deal
you try to be appealing, but you lose your appeal
and what about those shoes you're in today
(F#m - B)
they'll do no good on the bridges you've burnt along the way, oh

(E - B - C#m - A) (yes, these are the chorus chords)
you were willing to sell anything gone with your hurt
leave your footprints we'll shame them with our words
gone people all careless and consumed, gone

gone going gone everything gone, give a damn
gone be the birds when they don't wanna sing
gone people all awkward with their things gone

The Chronicles of Smiddick

2004-06-10T08:39:37Z

The Man Who Knew How to Use a Sewing Machine
by Drew Smith

There once was a boy who was too big for small sized shirts yet too small for medium sized shirts. He would go to the hippest store in town and purchase the hippest shirt in town only to find out when he got home that the hippest shirt in town was not pre-shrunk. The boy would play the washing-drier machine game...cold water, delicate low, cotton-high, nuclear crumbum poop but everytime his shirts came out of the drier, his useless male nipples would protrude like sno-cones. Then, one day, he learned from his girlfriend the art of the sew and that's the end. Peace.

it's meeeeeeeee

2004-05-10T14:24:36Z

Great. That word is neatly written in my COLL145B journal and do you know why? Because that class got it's ass kicked. I kicked it's ass. I bent it over and did my best Nick Lowery impression by kicking it in the ass. It's ass got kicked. It got kicked in the form of a 97.3%. This means that I no longer have to wake up at 5 o'clock on Mondays and thats means that I'll be better looking because of loads of beauty sleep. Have beauty sleep will travel.

I've talked about it forever but I really want to make my own guitar so if anyone stumbles upon a block of silver maple wood or alder or rosewood you stamp that stump and send it my way. I won't pay you back. I might send you some really bad your mama jokes that I made up on the spot but other than that U.S. currency will not be invovled. I found a Canadian two dollar bill (ya'll) so that...I won't even finish this sentence.

Righteous.

Get off of work Suzy.

sourpatchkid @ 2004-02-21T16:57:00

2004-02-21T14:58:30Z

like I went shopping today and bought gap pants and my girlfriend bought abercrombie pants that were cheaper than mine! what a fly hunni.

rokken like dokken

2004-01-19T13:25:21Z

http://dmoney.ath.cx/pieceofmind.mp3

sourpatchkid @ 2004-01-18T00:48:00

2004-01-17T22:48:16Z

sourpatchkid @ 2004-01-18T00:47:00

2004-01-17T22:47:47Z

sourpatchkid @ 2004-01-15T00:15:00

2004-01-14T22:15:44Z

Listen to me rock out...if you want to...

http://dmoney.ath.cx/Untitled.mp3

http://dmoney.ath.cx/Untitled2.mp3

http://dmoney.ath.cx/Untitled3.mp3

http://dmoney.ath.cx/Untitled4.mp3

http://dmoney.ath.cx/littlewing2.mp3

peace

2003-12-11T20:28:11Z

they are one person
they are too alone
the are three together
they are fOOoOOoOOr each other

David Crosby up in here! up in here!

Just chillin' on the computer remembering when I would watch Pokemon before school in eighth grade while I chowed down on some killer cinnamon-sugar toast. Man those were the days. I can't sleep because I drank too much Kool-Aid.

Oh black water keep on rollin
Mississippi moon won'tchyou keep on shinin' on me

Whoever reads this, do not ever work at Citicards.

What is a Live Journal anyway?

I'd like to hear some funky dixie land pretty mama come take me by the hand.

Trade in your Strokes and Vines and Hives and White Stripes Cds for Bob Marley and Allman Brothers and Led Zeppelin Cds.

Damn, this is going nowhere.