Nothing says 'I give you a piece of my soul' and 'I'm a murderer, surprise!' like a Horcrux

01. Name: Fran

02. How did you find out about Hogwarts Elite? A combination of google, my flist, and reading the fandom_wank wiki, many many years ago. I wrote out an application when I was still in school. I don't think a single answer (save the best/worst qualities) has stayed the same. Funny that.

||MIRROR OF ERISED||

03. What do you wish to accomplish in life?

You just dive right in to the hard questions! Okay, sure, what do I wish to accomplish? That's a bit of a complex question. There are things I'd like to do, sure. Places I'd love to see, places where I want to live, where I could breathe in the air and experience everything I can. You know, ford every mountain, climb every stream, that sort of thing. There are things I do now that I plan on continuing to do at all later stages of my life - supporting local artists, eating good food, playing video games, attending concerts, being part of a community, being involved with theatre, playing and performing music, hiking, biking, swimming, you know, life things. They bring me happiness. But they are not things of my own creation. I'm not passive in my enjoyment or in my participation, but they are not accomplishments per se. It would be much easier to answer this question with 'I wish to write a symphony and have it premiered in a major city' or 'I wish to invent a really useful thing and help people'. I am not that specific. I wish to be healthy and happy and long-lived. I hope that I continue to bring what happiness I can to the little family I have left. I hope that someday I stop worrying my mother quite so much. I hope that I am remembered after I'm gone for being a good soul, a kind soul, a generous and loving soul. I hope to learn more than I know, I hope to create and teach. If I have children, I want them to experience what I have loved and have the ability to chase as many opportunities as they can. I hope I can continue the conversation on feminism, socialism, accountability, the environment, worker's rights, political activism, and equality in whatever way I am able. I hope I can unlock the achievement of a life well lived, conversations well spoken, opinions well tested, wonders truly appreciated, paths well explored, people well loved, food greatly enjoyed, wine thankfully drunk, beer enthusiastically sampled, art freely and disastrously attempted, and music, music everywhere.

04. Describe exactly what you would see in the Mirror of Erised. (This is not the same question as #03.)

Okay, my answer has changed half a dozen times but I think I might know. It used to be something in the future, some advancement in career, or performance, or a late-night work session on new material. But now I think it's being with my family at our favourite beach, playing frisbee in and out of the water, hanging out, drinking gin-and-tonics, eating blondies. The late afternoon sun is warm and the air is still and cloudless. Someone has got a fire going with the driftwood that washes up with the spring storms and the camp stove is heating up water. Our tent is set up at the camp site. And we're happy, all of us. No worries, no cares, no missing the people who are gone. Maybe because they're also there, maybe because the grief is gone. I'm not sure. It's dangerous to stare into the Mirror overmuch.

05. What makes a person deserving of your respect?

Everyone is deserving of respect. Even the people you can't stand, even the people who will not even try to understand, even the people you disagree with so vehemently you think you'll breathe fire any second. I try to be respectful towards everyone and to treat everyone with dignity, common courtesy, and kindness. There are some whom I admire more than others, people I think interesting or worthy of extra note but I do not consider that the same as basic respect.

At a certain point, when you're exhausted from trying to convince someone of how damaging their opinions are, how hurtful, how wrong, how disrespectful that being disrespectful yourself does more harm than good, even if all you really want to do is ram a Hummer into their face.

06. What is your biggest pet peeve?

Oh, I don't know, out of tune violins? Things annoy me but then they don't. I try to let those things go. Small things annoy me but I think I play that up for humour. And some things annoy me but I do them myself so if I complained about them, I'd sound like a hypocrite. Like, I really hate in Star Trek how they always say 'some kind of energy beam' or 'some kind of ship' or 'some kind of forcefield'. Never, it IS an energy beam, it IS a ship. They do it so often in Voyager is makes me want to throw things. But the other day, I said it myself, so what can I do?

07. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

My eyes. I only know two people with worse vision than myself and one of them is my mother. And I can't wear contacts. Everyone else might think it's funny that I can't see the waves coming when at the beach but I assure you, it is not. Makeup forever remains an enigma.

08. If you could do any one thing and suffer no consequences, what would it be?

Fly.

09. What do you think are your top five positive characteristics?

01. I'm an easy-going, go-with-the-flow kind of person. When I get angry, it burns very brightly and then dissipates. Usually. I'm the, 'let's drive for three hours to see a friend before work tomorrow' kind of person. I like spontaneity. A lot. I wouldn't classify myself as a spontaneous person because I over-think, but I'd rather end up on someone's couch after drinks, dancing, and debating than be at home with my tumblr. (Though some days, I choose tumblr. I'm not 'go go go' all the time. I just, you know, go with it, whatever it is.)

02. I like to think of myself as being independent. I would rather do things and be alone than wait for a group of friends who have no interest in the same things to finally compromise on an activity. I despise waiting for a consensus. I'm pretty self-reliant in that way. I don't want to regret anything. I don't want to miss an opportunity that might just be one street over.

03. I like to help others. I can't quite say I'm charitable, because I don't donate as much as I could. But I try to always be there to help a friend, or if a stranger needs assistance. Kindness makes the world better, you know?

04. I'm very musical - I play an instrument and everything. I've heard this description many, many times over the course of my life. To be honest, I think the word 'musical' is a bit ridiculous. The ability to become a good musician is not decided by DNA but by effort, practice, dedication, ambition, and the ability to learn. I think perhaps the better description is open-minded. To be 'musical' means listening, copying, adding, emulating, evoking, creating, deconstructing, improving, trying something completely different, challenging old standards, holding on to history, and always, always perfecting. 'Talent' is a crutch.

05. I laugh as often as possible. I might not be that funny (in fact, I know I'm probably not) but I think being quick to laugh and even quicker to smile brings a little jolt of happy into my life (and hopefully to others as well).


10. What do you think are your top five negative characteristics?

01. I'm a perfectionist who goes to pieces when things fall short of perfection (which they always do).

02. I procrastinate which stems from having poor self-motivation and from being pathologically indecisive.

03. I'm excessively chatty, because I loathe being misunderstood. And I tend to babble when I don't know what to say. On the flip side, I'm very bad at responding to messages and keeping in touch. Ah, the joys of social anxiety.

04. I'm incredibly hard on myself and it hinders my ability to do the things that I think I would enjoy doing. It hinders my ability to improve. I think I'm looking at my flaws objectively, but really, that's not it at all.

05. I am very defensive. It's a fine line between receiving constructive criticism (which I crave) and being told how I'm doing things incorrectly (which turns me into the Hulk).


||HOGWARTS, A HISTORY||

11. Who is your favorite character in the Harry Potter series?

There was no one character that I was like, oh yes, I will cheer for you above all others but there were a couple for whom I felt deep affection. I like Harry a lot for being the sass master, and you know, for being him, capslock and all, recklessness and all, courage and prejudice and sheer luck and all. I like Neville for the parts of him that are so like me. I imagine being in that year was hard for Neville - to be on the periphery for so long, sort of there with the Trio but not really. I spent a lot of time like that, drifting without a real connection to someone else when I was the age he was from first year to sixth. But he didn't let that stand in his way of doing what was right. He was the one who always seemed to make mistakes but he didn't give up. He would visit his parents and try to give them as much happiness as he could (the strength of character to do that, my word). He grew stronger for the challenges he faced. He helped lead Hogwarts' resistance during the Trio's camping trip of doom (go Neville!). I always wanted more of him but I don't think I'm alone in that.

Bear with me, here (I told you I was chatty), but I like Percy a whole lot. He was wrong, yeah, I get that. But we always knew exactly what happened. We saw the whole thing along with Harry. But Percy is so normal. He lacks the charisma the other Weasley's seem to have in spades. He's careful and meticulous and ambitious but being a leader doesn't come naturally to him. He has to do it by the book. He seems to fall short of what he should be but I don't really think anyone ever took at close look at who he was. To Harry (and to us, by extension) the Burrow seemed like Heaven, warm, welcoming, and full of love. True, but I can also see how the bumbling parts of Arthur becomes less charming when compared to the efficiency of the Ministry, compared to what a joke he is to the other employees. How having such dynamic older brothers and the twin hellions on wheels immediately below would be overwhelming, overbearing, and so tiring to deal with after awhile. And Ron, attacked by chess sets, set on by Basilisks and murderers because of his association with Harry. Percy thinking that finally, he was being accepted on his talents and dedication to the higher offices of the Ministry. He'd felt alienated from his family for years. This was what he thought he wanted. Harry is subversive from book one. I imagine that someone like Percy, with his rules, with his narrow focus, would intrinsically dislike Harry for his reckless, dangerous approach to everything. Who wouldn't trust in the government? They're in place for a reason. They're the good guys. They're the institution to which Percy has dedicated himself. Ambitious? Yes. Evil? No.

So yeah, Percy, with his mistakes and his isolation and his regrets. And his appeal for forgiveness, his presence when it mattered most, the Weasley family together again for one brief, shining moment. It takes a lot of courage to admit you're wrong. I cried big, ridiculous tears. I was so happy JK had resolved his story line. Let us never speak of what happened next, shush, everything remained perfectly fine.

Okay, okay, okay, you're saying 'why is she still going' but IN UNIVERSE I would get along best with Ginny.

12. Who is your least favorite character in the Harry Potter series?

I'm going to say Pettigrew. I just...his betrayal is so incomprehensible to me. I wish there was more to it, more explanation, repentance, something. He was friends with the Marauders for seven years. I'm sure it wasn't all sunshine and happiness and laughter in the common room. I'm sure that he felt ignored, left out, ridiculed, whatever. But they were friends, they were his friends. And even if he had a lapse in judgment, even if Voldemort scared him so much he sold them out, even if he wasn't willing to die for his friends, (which is such a Gryffindor thing for Sirius to say, and I mean, we could all say 'we'd die for our friends'. I would like to think it'd be true. But until I'm staring down the wand of the Dark Lord, I don't know what my breaking point is and I'm very willing to bet that you don't know what yours is either. I think it's impossible to say I what I would or would not do. And I think it's disingenuous for Sirius, or anyone else, to judge someone on their courage or lack thereof when taken to their breaking point. These are real characters, not American action heroes. Courage and bravery is subjective to circumstance and person and does not determine your moral worth) that doesn't matter to me so much. My gripe with Pettigrew, no, my sheer repulsion towards Pettigrew is not based on the fact that he sold out the Potters, but based on his subsequent behaviour. He sold out Sirius, he killed innocent civilians, and he continued to aid Voldemort long after he could have made his escape.

How could be not be overcome with guilt? How could he stand to perpetuate his lie? How could he continue to serve Voldemort? The guilt would have eaten me alive. It would have torn out my soul. If he hated his friends, his charming, intelligent, oh so perfect friends, why didn't he stand on his own feet? At any point? Just leave. It was always better for my mental health to be a loner than to beg for scraps at the outside of a group. But Remus didn't suspect. Sirius didn't suspect. Lily and James didn't suspect. In such a dark time I like to think they would all have been suspicious, maybe not consciously, but it would have been there and I don't think Pettigrew was that good at faking for that long. I think there was genuine affection. There had to have been. I think that makes Pettigrew the most vile character in the whole series.

Also, one of the most unintelligent. If I had done what Pettigrew had done, I would have boarded the next ship out of England and gone to live in like, Indonesia or something. Some place warm. Some place far away from Potter and Voldemort. Some place far away from guilt and war and consequences. Idiot.

13. What was your favorite plot or character revelation in the Harry Potter series?

Sirius in the Prisoner of Azkaban. Fourteen years a prisoner in horrific conditions and innocent all along, thought a traitor by all he loved while the real traitor scampered free. I love the 'Grim' at the beginning, Harry only having such piecemeal knowledge and constantly, constantly breaking rules and going where he shouldn't. It's so quintessentially Harry. I love the reveal of the Marauders, the Marauders' Map in all of its glory, Remus actually teaching something of use, Sirius attacking the Pink Lady, 'attacking' Ron, the connection of the plot of saving Sirius with Buckbeak's escape. The fact that both Hermione and Ron were right about the firebolt being from Sirius AND being a benign present. What's more, the resolution between Sirius and Remus and that brief, brief, oh-so-short, damn-you-JK-realization that Harry has a godfather, Harry can have a happy home life. I still remember how uplifted I was when I read that thirteen years ago. How incredibly relieved I was for Harry as they walked back from the Shack. Okay, so basically I loved the third book. That's my unspecific answer. The third book is my favourite plot/character, sorry (not sorry, it's just so good).

(The Weasley twins exit from Hogwarts is, I think, my favourite moment in the series. Them telling Peeves to give her hell, ah, just, Fred and George.)

14. Describe the canon qualities for each house that accurately reflect you.

• Gryffindor: In comparison to introverts, I can be quite bold and forthright. I think by nature, I'm far more similar to Gryffindors than a lifetime of nurture has allowed me to be.

• Slytherin: here is a fluidity to Slytherin. I feel like (removed from Voldemort's recruitment) the members of Slytherin house are not afraid to adapt their thinking or their plans to achieve what they want. They weigh their outcomes before committing. That describes me pretty well. I'm also pretty resourceful. It's seriously a lot of fun to make things work against a time crunch or with insufficient materials. Those are the best challenges.

• Ravenclaw: I like books. A lot. Books, books, books. Books I buy and never read. Books I devour in one sitting. Books I start and never finish. Books on the beach with sand caught in the bindings. Books in languages I mean to learn but never do. Multiple copies of the same book I already own. Books with notations and dog-ears and forgotten bookmarks.

• Hufflepuff: I'm friendly and open. I'm also very fair-minded. Wow, driest answer ever, I think I've lost my anecdotes. Okay, let's go back to the series. Take the end of book one. I cheered with Harry and the rest when Gryffindor won the House Cup but it also bothered me greatly that Dumbledore waited until after the competition closed to add on those points. Dramatic? Yes. Unfair? Absolutely. And it was unnecessarily cruel. When I've promised to do something, or when I'm getting paid, I'm exceedingly thorough in getting the job done, even if I don't get paid for extra time. Even if I don't like it. Oddly enough, I have a bit of a lying problem so it's not that I'm honest all the time, far from it, just when it's the most inconvenient. Like when I'm crossing the US-Canada border.


15. Describe the canon qualities for each house that do not accurately reflect you.
• Gryffindor: You know that recklessness quality? Or, I guess, 'daring' and 'bold' if you want it in canon terms. Yeah, I have backup plans for my backup plans. I always look, debate for half an hour, or a day, or a year, and then talk myself out of the reasons for not doing the thing and hover, just there, at the edge of committing. At which point, someone else will push me into it because they're bloody sick of listening to me go on and on and why can't I just do it already?

• Slytherin: There are people who are ambitious and then there are people who like to fade into the background like wallflowers. I am in that latter category. I don't like putting myself forward. Socially, yes. If I need directions or a thing from the shop, yes. If I need to promote my abilities in my chosen field, not so much.

• Ravenclaw: I get frustrated very easily. I'd never be able to get past their door knocker. And unless I'm around other gregarious people, I tend to isolate myself. I think being in Ravenclaw would be very lonely.

• Hufflepuff: It's not that I'm afraid of hard-work. It's just, if I can get away with not doing it at all, I'll take that route. I could provide you with examples from my time in school, but really, what good is there in looking backwards? I will only say this, you don't have to do all the work assigned in a class to pass it. And if you really did need to write those essays, well, you're there for the experience not the final transcript.


||HOGWARTS EXPRESS||

16. Age: 26

17. Optional: Link us to where you have promoted this community in your personal journal to earn your future house five points.