The Gift
Richard's SF Storyline, Chapter 1.5
copyright comidacomida 2018
The Jaguar's predatory gaze peered at me as he settled down into the armchair on the far side of the room. His tail curled into his lap as his paws rested on his knees. He spoke simply but cryptically. "I want you to be my voice."
I knew I needed some sleep, but I also needed some perspective. I settled down everyone for the night. "Okay, everyone... I know my place is small, but there should be enough room for everyone here, right?"
The spirits all exchanged glances, except for Balam, who continued staring right at me. Even though he could not hear what I said, he still managed to piece things together. "You are going to bed?"
I nodded slowly, realizing that, even though I was tired, I still had far too many questions to have answered, especially when it came to what he'd just said. "Yes. Everyone will sleep here. You can come with me into my room so we can talk."
His unclear expression remained just as unreadable. "Good. I will do that."
When Jack saw me leaving with Balam in tow, he challenged that. "Richard-- the savage is following thee."
I really didn't want to start trouble between the spirits but I was also really tired so I explained things as simply as possible. "I know Jack. I asked him to. I have a lot of questions and I need answers."
The feathers covering the Gryphon's neck puffed up slightly and his beak opened and closed a few times before he managed to form what it was he wanted to say. "Dost... dost thou require aid? I can stay with thee if--"
Shaking my head, I motioned him back to the living room. "No, it's okay, Jack. Thank you. I just need some time with Balam to figure out what started all this. I'm pretty sure he's the reason I can see and hear all of you and I need to figure out why."
Jack remained at the entrance to the hallway, his shoulders slumped slightly as he regarded me. "Very well, Richard. I will be here... thou needst only call."
I offered a polite smile. "Thanks."
Entering my room, I turned around, closing the door, but I called out before doing so. "You're welcome."
Once I was finally separated from the rest of the spirits I looked back to my room, looking around for Balam; I saw him off to the side, standing in front of a shelf that held a number of items I'd brought with me from home. I considered the right way to phrase my question in Spanish before asking him "What are you looking for?"
He rotated in place, his Topaz colored eyes glinting in the scant light provided by the overhead light fixture (it had sockets for three light bulbs but only one worked). His response was vague. "I found what I was looking for."
Pointing to the shelf I tried to remember the right word for it. In the end I had to improvise. "What were you looking for on the... wall table?"
Balam's eyes never left me. He said a single word. "Estante."
That was the word for 'shelf'. I repeated my question, hoping to get an answer. "What were you looking for on the shelf?"
The Jaguar's attention finally returned to the wall as he responded. "I was not looking for; I was looking at."
I approached him, stopping when I stood off to the side and behind him with my focus also on the shelf; on it was a small wooden box I'd received for my tenth birthday from my aunt, a red decorative flask my mom bought for me at a farmer's market when I'd said I liked how it looked, and a small jewelry box that held locket my grandmother left for me after she passed away. None of it seemed particularly eye-catching to me so I pressed my question further. "What were you looking at?"
Balam's gaze returned to me as he motioned to the shelf with an arm. "These things are important to you."
It was more of a statement than a question but I figured his words still deserved a response of some kind. "Those were all gifts I got from my family."
He nodded, still looking at me. "Yes. Gifts are important. They are special."
I could tell he was trying to make a point of some kind, but either I was too obtuse to figure it out or he was just being too vague. I attempted to agree with him, using my limited Spanish vocabulary. "Yes. I love all of my gifts. I have them with me because I love them all. Which one do you like most?"
Without missing a beat, Balam reached out and touched me in the chest with a single finger, his claw disappearing into my shirt and body without any pain or indication that it had caused me any harm. I stepped back even as he stated "This one."
It was a strange gesture and a stranger answer. Regardless, I chose to focus instead on the reason I'd had him join me in my room. "You said that you want me to be your voice. Did I understand correctly?"
He nodded succinctly. "Yes."
Moving slowly, I went to sit down on my bed, still facing him as I slowly took off my shoes and socks. I grunted, wincing once or twice as I did so; the soreness from the accident hadn't left me and I could still feel where my ribs were aching. Balam said nothing as I went through the first steps of getting ready for bed. He continued to offer no more insight as I got back up and crossed the room to rummage through my dresser for some suitable bed clothes. As I searched I pressed him for more information. "Why do you need a voice?"
The Jaguar's answer was as simple and straight forward as if he were explaining a basic fact of the world to a child. "Humans cannot hear me."
He made a very good point but, the fact that I could hear him brought up another. I grabbed a pair of sweat pants and an old shirt out of the dresser. Turning my back to him, I began stripping, and pressed for more information. "I can hear you... but I couldn't before. Why can't you just make more people hear you like you did with me?"
I drew my shirt off and began undoing my jeans. He remained quiet for several seconds and waited until I was stepping into my sweats before answering, but his words had nothing to do with my question. "You are not fat."
Turning to regard Balam I regarded the Jaguar with as exaggerated questioning expression as I could; my vocabulary was limited enough that I decided to rely on non-verbal communication as much as my grasp of Spanish. "No, I am not fat. Why?"
Again, instead of answering my question, he offered up another seemingly unrelated comment. "You are quiet. You are respectful."
I had trouble figuring out where he was going with his statements. "Thank you?"
For the first time ever, Balam's muzzle actually shifted from its immutable, neutral expression and I saw the faintest hint of what could have been a smile. "You're welcome."
It was, in a way, endearing and it gave me a strangely warm feeling but, at the same time it was incredibly frustrating being unable to get a straight answer out of the Jaguar. "Why did you give me the ability to talk to spirits?"
The smile disappeared and his expression returned just as quickly to neutral. The Jaguar sat down right on my floor, crossing his feet beneath him as he settled into place. "I want you to be my voice."
Letting out a breath slowly I attempted to collection my thoughts; the discussion was going in circles. "You already said that."
He inclined his head slowly in a nod, his eyes remaining on me throughout the motion. He then said simply. "Yes. You already asked that question and my answer did not change."
Maintaining my cool I tried a different approach. "Why me?"
He began his explanation by repeating himself again. "You are not fat. You are quiet. You are respectful..."
I was ready to interrupt him "I-"
But he continued speaking, and actually brought the focus back to my question. "...you are not like others I have seen from here. I am interested in you. I want to learn."
I was taken aback by the statement. "What do you want to learn?"
His answer, though direct, still managed to be vague. "How to teach you."
We continued talking for over an hour, but I failed to actually learn much. He later told me that he was providing me answers to all of my questions but I didn't ask the right ones. I later realized that I just wasn't ready at that time to find out exactly what he had in mind. I went to bed frustrated, just short of ordering him to leave me alone. For some reason I couldn't figure out though, I wasn't willing to send him away. I laid down in my bed, mind a-jumble with the countless half-answers he'd provided.
His final words were strangely prophetic. "Sueños buenos, Richard."
An interesting thought, but somehow I think whatever Balam has planned may be just a little more... dynamic.
Balam's people did not allow themselves to become fat, except in specific cases. Where with most other peoples, being fat meant wealthy until only a few decades ago. Look at the true primitive peoples in National Geographic. Few will be fat.
Yes-- Balam does appear to have some major guiding principles... if only Richard could get the Cliff Notes version so he'd be better prepared to handle him. :)
-TGU.
Something like "mesa del muro" (wall table) as opposed to "estante" (shelf)
Or, as you noted, "¿que estas buscando?" (What are you looking for?) instead of "¿que estas mirando?" (literally, "What are you watching?").
I remember trying to put together complex thoughts in Spanish as I was learning it and the frustration that came with not being able to fully convey my thoughts. Out of everything, that is where I find the greatest empathy with poor Richard dealing with Balam throughout the day.
AND, I point out, Spanish is not Balam's primary language either-- so it's like two students in high school/college trying to communicate in their foreign language class.