Friends In A Better, Braver Lifetime 

                                                  By: A.X. Bueno 

Why is keeping in touch sometimes so hard?

Why can it be so difficult to keep friends?

With these questions my mind has frequently sparred 

And yet all this mental sparring rarely leads to anything other than answers well known by now and contemplative dead ends

At the end of the day only with fate and myself can I really contend 

For I cannot change your actions or your silence anymore than you can change mine 

I spent so long pondering what ifs and questioning how and when to reach out that ultimately I ended up leaving you behind 

It hurts to know that we’ll probably never be friends now or possibly have been even more 

But at the end of the day we both wound up shutting the proverbial maybe even physical door

I think I know which of us did it but I wonder if you even remember anymore

Me, I tend to hold on tightly to memories of the past 

Of course I’ll probably never know how you really felt about our connection that didn’t last 

I really try not to dwell on regrets but it’s hard not to when you’re not fully sure what went wrong

Maybe if I was less of an awkward coward we’d still be talking and you wouldn’t be gone
Although I’ll never truly know what I could have done or said to keep you around 

And I may never know as life continues to simply drag on 

While I’ll definitely hold onto the memories of whatever we were and had I won’t bog you down 

I won’t try to pursue when that probably wouldn’t work and instead just let you go 

I’ll continue to consider you a part of my life’s journey however and occasionally think back to you though 

It’s difficult not to sometimes imagine the better world with the braver me and us being friends

Still I do accept that sometimes things in life just have a bittersweet end