Current Track: Blabb
KEYBOARD SHORTCUTS

>Anthrostate under attack

>Human goes to his local army recruitment center to join up

>Gets in line between two big and burly anthros, one is already sharpening her claws while the other reads a pamphlet about what (and who) is allowed to be brought back as a war trophy

>Gets to the front of the line

>Sitting at a desk is an older and grizzled looking wolf anthro, a large scar going across one eye and a bullet hole in one of her ears

>She stares at him with a stoic expression before opening her maw

>"Name and age?"

>*gulp*

>"M-my name is John Smith and I'm eighteen M-Ma'am"

>She looks down to enter this information into her computer

>"Okay John, your name is fine, you're old enough to enlist, but we both know what the obvious problem here is."

>Her eyes drift back up to his, a knowing expression on her face

>He leans forward and slams his hands on her desk

>"Oh come on! Just because I'm a human doesn't mean I can't serve my country! Please! I can't just sit idly by and watch the sacrifices our troops make without doing something myself!"

>A dead silence fills the room

>Until it's replaced with raucous laughter from everyone who heard what he just said

>His face grows beet red as the laughter gradually dies down

>The wolf reaches up and pats him on the head condescendingly

>"Oh you cute little humie, so full of determination and vigor, you'll make a good husband someday."

>She stops the petting and looks over his shoulder

>"Next!"

>He moves to block her view

>"Please! I just want to do something to help out. There's got to be something I can do." He pleads

>She puts a paw on her chin as she thinks, a devious expression growing on her face

>"Hmmmmm, well, we don't exactly allow humies in the military. But we do allow civilian contractors for...specialist roles."

>"I'll take it!" He exclaims. "Whatever it is I'll take it!"

>She looks down and begins writing on a post it note

>"Alright humie, go to the office at this address and talk to the receptionist. From there they'll induct you into MATE."

>"Mate?"

>"Stands for the Morale Assessment, Treatment, and Entertainment unit. They make sure our brave soldiers have their psychological needs taken care of while on the front line."

>"...okay. So what is it I'll be doing exactly?"

>"I literally just told you John. And by the way, you may want to begin taking calcium supplements."

>"Why's that?"

>"You'll need strong bones to be in a MATE unit. Start drinking lots too."

>"So I'll be in combat?"

>A wicked grin appears on her maw

>"In a manner of speaking. Now go to this address." She hands him the post it note. "And you'll be serving a valuable purpose to the anthrostate in no time."

>"Okay I'll do that! Thanks Ma'am"

>He dashes out of the room with a wide grin

>"Next! Name and Age?"