Somewhere on a distant world, innumerable generations of breeding and genetic manipulation were required to create that first machine-washable goose.

But seemingly mere moments later, they were everywhere, nesting in brand-new washing machines, annoying commercial cleaners, and honking terrifyingly at innocent prison inmates to try and make them drop the soap.

Only when it was discovered that they were also no longer edible, did anyone realize just what a horrifying evolutionary advantage had been accidentally handed to these merciless feathery fiends.