After a discussion with Josh, Amy climbs to the top of her dorm and stays there until dark. The air was getting colder, but Amy still didn’t feel like leaving, since a thought tormented her much more than the cold. If this was her home in the First Colony she would be at the top of Nikki right now but here in Alana the top of her dorm will have to do since she can’t go climb the white tower let alone other people's home.  

‘How can I make them accept me,’ she thinks over and over but nothing comes to her mind. Only when she feels sleepy because it’s past her bedtime that she head back to her room.  

“Are you alright Amy?” Biscuit asks the moment she steps into her room. Biscuit herself is still not asleep because she too worries about her friends who usually return to their room on time.  

“I’m fine,” said Amy and landed on her bed.  

Biscuit wants to ask Amy what’s on her mind but hesitates and shuts the light.  

After a time in the dark, a voice asks “Do you hate me?”  

“No...I think I already told you this before.” Biscuit turns to look at a red ant “Did something happen?”  

“I talked with Josh,” Amy answered.  

“Yes?” Biscuit tries to make her friend expand on what she is saying without pushing her.  

“It seems what I did when I abandoned you. Seem to affect our friend more than I could imagine.”  

“What?” Biscuit confuses “I’m not good enough for anyone to care for me that much. I doubt they would be so angry at you over me Amy.”  

“Why do you say you are not good enough?” Amy sounds angry “You are plenty good Biscuit, in fact, you are one of the best people I have met since I left my home. Don’t say things like that to yourself.”  

“But I’m a coward. I can’t do anything by myself and my water magic suck.”  

“Who cares about your water magic, your ice magic is amazing.” Amy still remembers when Biscuit saved Eirian in the Great Red River.  

“I do! I care!” Biscuit gets up but immediately regrets that she shouts at her friend and says sorry.  

Their wolf roommate woke up from the sound “Go back to sleep Luna" said Amy and Luna quickly flopped back to sleep without care.  

They stay silent for a moment and after the breathing sound of their roommate stable Amy continues “Fine, you suck. You’re like the worst water user, second to only most of every goat and sheep I ever know who can’t even properly bend water to a solid shape. But you’re the best ice user I know.”  

“Miss Hellen is better than me.”  

‘She’s really making it impossible.’  

“Look, you are the daughter of Pan. Don’t belittle yourself that would be disrespectful to your god right?”  

Is that how it works?  

“Alright, I’ll try not say bad things about myself.”  

“Don’t think too. It doesn’t matter if you don’t say if you still believe it.”  

“I’ll try. Thank you, Amy. Good night.”  

“Night.”  

The next morning Amy felt better than yesterday but she still had a problem. She’s still not close to finding a way to make her teammate accept her.  

Asking Josh and Biscuit doesn’t help maybe she could try to consult a teacher. They did tell everyone to come to them with anything after all.  

But who to ask? Amy thinks of Prof. Tonia first as an ant like her she could have the best understanding but Amy also noticed Tonia doesn’t socialize that much with other teachers or students, mostly she performs her duty as an ante of Alana and stays undercity. Prof. Fay seemed friendly but her style didn’t seem like something Amy would like to emulate so Amy headed to Prof. Hellen's room.  

The door was locked when Amy tried to open the door but she could clearly see someone was inside. Soon after Miss Hellen open the door “Sorry about that. We usually keep the door open but there was some problem a while back...come in.”  

Hellen adjusted a seat height so Amy could comfortably talk with her “Usually our ant student would go to Tonia. How could I help you today?”  

Amy tells Hellen her situation and a whole story starting from the assignment where she abandons Biscuit and her teammate start to distance themself from her.  

“Ah yes, this is a problem indeed. Have you talked with Biscuit about this yet?”  

“Yes, several times in fact. She already said she forgave me. It was the other boys who still distrust me when they aren’t even the ones I left behind to make our team win.”  

“Even Calamity?”  

“He doesn’t say it to me directly but...”  

“I see.” Hellen surprise. She tries not to smile so Amy does not misunderstand her but Hellen is quite happy a wolf does care for sheep well well-being.  

“If it were you, would you ever forgive me?” Amy asked.  

“Child I have forgiven someone who has done far worse than you” Hellen looks at Amy “You being concerned and wishing to earn their friendship back is already a great start. This may take time but I’m sure a capable ante like yourself will earn their trust back in no time.”  

“But I have no idea what to do. I already try to give them a gift.”  

“Hmm,” Hellen looked at Amy from top to bottom and recalled her actions and words since she entered school.  

“You lack grace.”  

“I’m sorry?”  

“Grace. A quality all women should have,” Hellen then took out an old photo from her desk, despite its colour fading this picture was the sharpest and clearest photo she ever saw.  

In the picture is a woman standing on a hill with a man overlooking an army of humans marching in formation below. She stood still with concern in her eyes while the man looked proud and confident despite the sky turning grey with the heavy wind blowing both their hair and clothes, looking as if the army was marching into the storm.  

The woman's face resembles the face of the Alana statue.  

“A moment from a lifetime ago taken with a camera from the old world, one of a few still function at that point I think.”  

“She’s look even more beautiful here than the statue.”  

“She’s beautiful” said Hellen “But what else do you see?”  

Amy looks at the photo again “She’s elegant...despite looking afraid she doesn’t seem weak.”  

“That was because she was fearful for her people. Even then courage is what she never lacks. From the first moment, she already defied her parent order for what she believed in. I rarely meet someone with such love and humility even now being alive longer than a century, and I have met lot of people. She finds a way to fill those around her with hope and joy. If there is someone you would want to emulate as a model then just study her. Learn what she likes as a person, what she has done, the choice she made.”  

“Are you sure this is what I should be trying to be as an ant?” Amy hesitates, a great woman in the photo is not something she feels like she could be at all.  

“You are an ante. What do you expect my advice to be?” Hellen is curious.  

“I don’t know; how to command others, how to lead, how to make other people like you, forgive you?”  

“You can’t force other people to like you, Amy.”  

“But I’m to be a diplomat. I should be well like. I should be able to make other people listen and respect me if I’m to represent my country.”  

“Right now what you need is patience,” Hellen lifts her finger to make Amy stop talking and start listening.  

“Even Alana, I doubt she became who she is from the moment she was born. I’m sure with effort you can be an ant you could be proud of too.” Hellen thinks back on what she knows of ant “Who is it that you admire.”  

“Our queen.”  

A common answer for ante.  

“What do you admire in her?”  

Amy paused for a moment, all ant love their queen and there was a simple answer every ant gave “She is our mother who loves us and cares for us. She toils in her work to take care of the colony. She compassionate to us her children and fierce to our enemy.”  

“Answer like every ant who ever lives.” there is no condemnation in Hellen's voice “But perhaps you should look for more role models, someone you personally know not just been told about who they are and what they have done. I find that it’s easier to motivate and change ourselves.”  

Amy thinks for a long time but no one comes up. She lives most of her life in the First Colony which most ant doesn’t interest her much. They do their job, she does her, some talk, gossip and politics in between but no one peak her interest. Here in Alana, there are more kinds of people and races which surprises her but no name comes to mind. In the end, the only one she can think of is Biscuit despite all her many shortcomings which irritate Amy at times.  

“Biscuit?” Amy threw her friend's name out with doubt.  

“What do you admire in her?”  

“Honestly I’m not sure, maybe her...ehh”  

Hellen smiles “Maybe finding that could be a key that you looking for. Maybe you don’t even need an answer in words, just pay attention when you’re with her and you may find yourself a changed woman one day long after you have changed.”  

“Or you can just tell me the answer.”  

“How would I know what you like about Biscuit,” Hellen states simple fact.  

‘This is just bad counsel.’  

Before Amy left she thought of Biscuit.  

“What about Biscuit do you know how to help her overcome her shyness?"  

“I don’t believe in saving others. Especially those who do not wish to be saved”  

“But she wants to change”  

“If she needs help she will come to ask me herself,” said Hellen “She can’t wait for others to come help transform her forever. If she wants to change then she must take a step herself to change it.”  

“If this was Prof. Fay she would do everything to help her even if she didn’t ask but it’s not my style I suppose. Still, I believe Biscuit is stronger than she thinks. And with a friend like you I think both of you will be fine, just keep working on it.  

After meeting with Hellen Amy heads to the training room where everyone meets every week to let Calamity train them. So far all he makes everyone do is simple exercise, running around in a stadium and pushing up or lifting weights.  

It was rather boring but doing it with everyone does seem to make it more interesting.  

‘I was the best at lifting weights who would have thought.’  

Amy can lift even more weight than Calamity but he does have more agility and endurance.  

‘Perhaps it’s the way he moves or his breathing technique.'  

The running part is nice too since an open field is better than a closed room and Amy always encourages Biscuit to keep running because Calamity is not what you would call a good teacher if Biscuit falls flat on the grass all he would do is stare at her and sometimes say a few words telling her to get up. He may look scary yes but to Biscuit who is already exhausted, it’s not exactly going to motivate her to keep running more so Amy and others step in to cheer her on.  

Someday if he’s in a good mood Amy might even succeed in making him practice close combat with her as others watch and learn but he’s not interested today.  

“Are you heading back to our room right away?” said Biscuit.  

“No, I am thinking of looking for some book in the library about Princess Alana”  

“You are going to the library? Can you return these books for me please” Josh came over and pressed his wings together to plea “I need to meet with Blake after and I don’t want to be late”  

“Fine.” Amy sighed already exhausted but still wanting to get on her friend's best side.  

“Thank, Amy.” Josh dropped a few books on Amy's back before flying off.  

At the library, Doran brings her bad news about Arthur.  

“They what!?” Amy shouted in anger which made everyone nearby look at her.  

“Shh, not too loud here please.”  

“Sorry.”  

Amy learns from Doran that other ants tore up Arthur’s book and his ID card. And now she has to pay a fine for both the damaged book and the issue of his new ID card.  

“I’ll pay the fine but do you know who did it,” Amy tapped the floor trying to hold herself from shouting and hitting some ants.  

“Arthur won’t tell me” Doran looks at Amy “Please don’t pursue this Amy. I don’t think it would turn well for Arthur.”  

“Let’s me worry about that. Give me his ID card I’ll give it back to him.”  

“He asked me to keep it for him. He worries others might try to tear it up again.”  

“Then please keep it for him” Amy pays Doran all Arthur’s fine and heads to the undercity.  

It took her a long time walking and listening in on ante in several wemba about anything that could be a clue to what happened. All she knows is that Arthur usually works on the lower level so if a worker attacks him then the ante who is responsible for wemba nearby must have heard about it.  

Despite having fewer ante here listening for clues is not as hard as Amy thought it would be since some workers can also speak so she can listen in as she walks by.  

She finally found a breakthrough when many workers and a few ante were on their break time. In the break room, all ants who can talk speak to each other and Amy quickly overheard Arthur's name from one of the platoon leader ants.  

This lieutenant seems to be the one involved in this bully and at least one captain supports him.  

She wants to barge in and kick down all ants present at this instant but Prof. Hellen's words stop her.  

Grace  

‘I don’t know what that is but I’ll have to be more subtle this time to not get Arthur in trouble at least.’  

“What this about worker who arrogantly made ID for himself” Amy walked over to a small group of ants, about two hundred of them, a small number compared to a group she regularly sees in First Colony.  

“My ladi.” the lieutenant bowed.  

Amy who is bigger than all of them stood out when she stood up close. She waves her antenna to make them rise and tell her a story of what happened.  

“And then our captain sent him to a toilet cleaner duty haha.” the lieutenant and his men laugh.  

“Haha, how creative. And who might your captain be so that I might give him appropriate prize.”  

“Oh, let me take you to him. We just call him Cap.”  

‘All ant follow rank, even among worker have their own chain of command. I could have just asked any ante here to announce a search for those who attack Arthur, with our number there are usually some low-rank troops who step out to point at the perpetrator even if they can’t speak. Low-rank workers don’t know how to lie so their testimony can be trusted and judgement comes quick but I did this to keep Arthur's name low profile. The last thing he needs is for every ant to look around to find out what happened with him.’  

While on their way Amy saw an old man with white hair but she ignored him so as to not lose sight of the lieutenant despite being curious about who would come down here.  

“My lady whad honor do I have for you do come med me?” the captain bowed.  

“She wan do reward you Cap, for punish de idio rund,” said the lieutenant as a few workers behind them snap their jaw in cheer.  

“Ah, yes dad one. Id is my presure do keep dose snoody fool who don know dare place.”  

“Yes, how did you come to know of his ID card anyway.”  

“me my ladi, I saw id and dold Cap,” lieutenant proudly claimed.  

“I see so it just two of you?”  

“Our men have been rowdy for a while now since dad rund was given name. De id is jus de las pebble,” all workers who can understand his word nod in agreement while some just nod along.  

“Well, that won’t do now since I was going to name him a new lieutenant colonel.”  

The room went silent.  

Amy can’t make all workers like Arthur but if he’s high rank then most workers must obey him and usually high rank workers receive a name from ante who commands them anyway so this solved Arthur having name problem too. She can discuss his work details with Prof. Tonia later.  

“I’m sorry my lady but I dink you confuse his rank? He was jus a sergeand before so if you demonte him den he will be...”  

Amy slaps him “Are you questioning my judgement?”  

A slap but with ant leg it’s more like a punch.  

“No, my lady. Your wish is my command unless oder ante order otherwise.”  

“Good things I come from First Colony so besides Lady Tonia and few of my friends there is no one rank higher here.”  

All workers stay quiet.  

“Bud if you name rund lieude colonel he is one rank away from dop rank worker can have. He don deserve such...”  

Amy slaps the lieutenant too.  

“Any captain here who can speak” Amy shouts in this wemba they’re in.  

“I can my lady” there are many ants who don’t belong to the Cap group here but only one steps out while others shake in fear.   

“From now on I appoint you to work under Arthur. Report under him and me, help him manage these workers and report to me if anyone disobeys. Tell him about his new promotion too.”  

“As you command” the captain ant bowed.  

Amy quickly realizes she has to name him if she wants to check up on him in the future without needing to walk the whole colony to find him. “From now on you shall be known as Jerom. Serve Arthur well.”  

“It is my honour.”  

Amy noticed how well-spoken Jerom is. She suspects he must have hard to get to where he is and he might even going to get a promotion to lieutenant colonel rank soon yet now he was ordered to follow some sergeant with very little hope of ranking up any more but he doesn’t look angry at all.  

“I’ll treat you to a good meal later,” said Amy.  

“Your generosity knows no bounds.” captain Jerom gave a confident smiles and left Amy to find Arthur.  

“As for you guy toilet duty and hard labour for a week!”