I re-adjust in my seat crossing my legs hearing James’ footsteps fade from my range of hearing. Funny, he usually does the father-son skit when he leaves. Then again it’s James, which really questions who is the mature one. My phone buzzes and I get a text from Kev.

It read, “Hey Dex, Srry bout wut hapnd the other day”, with varying emojis expressing a sad face or tears. He sends a second message “I was a total ass and I didn’t mean to hurt you if I did somehow” I text back “It’s okay, and it didnt hurt much.” I wouldn’t let that comment mess up our friendship that easily.

After some time talking back and forth for what seemed like a couple hours, he asks me, “Hey do you want to hang out today? Say, the gym?”

It took me a while to respond, just thinking about what happened the last time. Of course, that ended in some small embarrassment, and he was a little buzzed. I text back “yeah sure”. Afterward, he told me to meet up at 12:00 pm at the parking lot.

Around 11:45 I put on a pair of red shorts and a white T-shirt for the gym. In a sports bag, I toss in some jeans and a campus polo shirt I had stashed in the closet when we finish working out. I grab my dorm room keys and leave the room.

I take my time walking out into the pathway leading to the parking lot. I think about Kev knowing about my true feelings. At least me not expressing them to him. But regardless, I have to be careful how I talk to him or I will easily give off some strange vibe. “Try to play it cool Dex,” I say to myself mentally.

In the parking lot, I see Kev leaning on his Sedan. His ears swivel to my direction and he looks up. I wave and jog to meet him.

“Oh, hey Dex what’s up? He asks me

“Nothing much, you?”

“Same, Nothing interesting happen lately. Well not worth re-mentioning I mean.” He scratches the back of his head. He walks up to me and puts his right paw on my right shoulder. “Hey, I’m really sorry about the other night. What I said was uncalled for, and I shouldn’t have drunk that much and more knowing my tolerance to alcohol.” He says lowering his ears a bit. He lets go of my shoulder and extends his left paw to shake “Can we put that behind us?”

I smile “Yeah we can, and no harm was done. It’s water under the bridge.” I shake his paw.

He smiles back “Thanks, man, I’ll promise to do better.” I nod my head.

“Now, ready to pump some iron?” He asks with a spark in his eyes.

I thrust my arm forward “You know it man”

“Alright let’s go” He spins towards his car and poses.

We both enter the car on our respective sides. I put my bag in the backseat behind the passenger’s seat. I don’t see his bag, but I assume he uses the sacred trunk to hide the treasure. We both buckle up and get ready for taking off. He asks me something before he starts the ignition “Where’s James? He out studying for something?” “I guess, he’s heading to the library. “Hm,” he says while driving out of the parking lot and into the main road.

When we are on the main highway to the city he asks me some more questions. “I never really asked yet, but how long have you really known James?” Man To think it’s been 11 years already, but time flies by. “I’ve known him since childhood, around 10 years old I think.” “Man, that’s awesome! Most of the people I knew from high school I hardly remember. He says while turning right from a 4-way traffic light to the road to the gym. I can’t explain it I feel elated that I’ve been with a good friend for so long, and to have really understood how long it’s been. “I mean yeah, I can understand that. He’s like that one trip to a beach where you feel like you have to come back, and you do, and it feels good. So yeah, James is revisiting the same, nice, beach repeatedly. That same beautiful beach. I mean that’s how I see it.” We have an awkward pause and I realized the stupidity I just said. I really want to punch myself in the throat realizing what I just said about my best friend. “Uh. I-I’m not saying that James is beautiful, I mean something eye goggling, I mean uh you know, attention seeking by any means” Way to go Dex, said you were going to keep it normal and you’re already cracking like an egg being smashed. “Uhh yeah,” Kev says awkwardly. I flush intensely in embarrassment.

He revives the conversation from the awry mood “Anyway, some people would confuse you two for family easily, seeing how many people see you two walking with each other. Perfect couple.”

Did he have to say it like that? “Couple? Pfft! Yeah, right. And how would we be confused for a family? I’m a canine and he’s human.” I say obviously embarrassed. “I hope you see the error here.”

“Okay, Mr. Specifics. I meant like a figurative family. Of course, you’re not blood-related. Or are you?” He says stopping the car at a red light. He pretends to have a clipboard in his left arm and adjusts invisible glasses. He imitates a doctor saying “”Sorry sir our tests have come back and you two are indeed without a doubt blood-related brothers. Same mother and same father.”

I try to hold a big laugh as I imitate a disbelieving patient. “Oh, my! How could this be?” I fan myself in false panic “I should’ve known! His grandfather was a Great Dane!”

He fixes his invisible glasses and says “And your ancestry is human”

Now things are really starting to get to the silly side. “My great, great, great grandmother must be Jane Goodall,” I say with exasperation.

“Well that’s sheer coincidence, that’s the same for James as well, according to our tests. You both have the same great, great, great grandmother.” He can’t help himself this time and bursts out laughing. I don’t take too long to join him in our friendly banter. We both notice that the adjacent cars of people are giving us weird and shocked faces. I look out of my window to see a female human look at me bewildered. I decide to fool around and roll down the window. I pump my fist like a frat boy. The woman freaks out and drives off like crazy. I get back in the car and laugh my ass off with Kev who witnessed the whole thing.

I joke, “You will bow down before the fist pump!”

He resists saying, “I resist thy fist pumping action.”

“You will take my fist and you will enjoy it!” I just caught on to what I said. Again, so much for keeping it normal. “Not like that.”

“Wait, what?” he says surprised. “Dude you made it weird,” he chuckles. “But seriously, watch how you say things, dude,” he says while pulling up into the gym’s parking lot. We both unbuckle our seatbelts and exit the car. I grab my bag in the backseat while he grabs his from the trunk. Before we enter he asks me, “ So what’s your plan today? Cardio, weight lifting, or some stretching?”

“Some stretches, then the good old treadmill. After that, some pull ups while listening to some 80s music. You know, that kind in movie montages?” I say rolling my eyes.

He chuckles saying, “I see you're going cliché today.” I smile at his comment. “Well after stretches, I’m going to do some yoga.”

Wait, what? Yoga?! Kev doing Yoga? I didn’t know planet X was actually coming the next day.

“Yoga? I didn’t think you would like to do that today. Then again, I didn’t think I would be at the gym today, but that’s just how it works out, huh?”

He snickers, “Works out, haha. What a pun.”

I smile. “Well that was unintentional.”

“Well I was going to do yoga, but I was going to save that for Leg Day, you know?”

“Oh okay. We better go now, so we can take our spots.”

“Yeah let us go.” He gestures his hand to the front entrance.

Inside we flash our member passes and the guy at the front desk nods. He tells us, “Have a good workout.” We both nod and took our positions on the far left side of the gym.

Before we even started stretching Kev grabs my shoulders and asks, serious, “Do you need any shampoo? I have a spare just in case you didn’t.”

I respond in an imitating tone. “I have my own shampoo, but thanks.”

“Good because last time was a disaster if you remember. Not only did you forget your shampoo at home, you forgot to grab a towel at the entrance and didn’t realize until you were soaking wet. I lent you my shampoo, which you didn't even thank me for, and you didn’t enjoy it at all. But God, it was hilarious with you smelling like me all day till we got home.” He lets go of me laughing as he goes to the locker room. Before he left completely, I toss him my bag to put them together in the same locker.

I sit on one of the pieces of exercising equipment and wait for him to return. While he was gone, I suddenly remember that day, and Kev flawlessly described it. I didn’t like that metro chemical smell he uses. I’m more of a naturalist when it comes to my taste in scent. I will be honest, though, it was strangely alluring.

After some stretches, a few miles of distance ran on the treadmill, and many pull-ups while listening to shuffled music from my phone, I finish my workout routine by going to the bench press. I start small, of course, and then go on to some more intense weights. Today is different seeing that I am going to try to bench press 210 lbs with 10 reps and 4 sets leading to it. Kev acted as my spotter in case the weights start to crush my windpipe. While I am lifting, Kev and I converse.

“So Dex, have you considered any interest in anyone?”

Wait, here and now would he ask me this? Well, it’s better than texting me this question.

“I-Interest?” I push up for 8 making a hefty breath. “Like…who?” I push up after 2 seconds for my 9th push-up.

“You know, a date? No pressure. I can understand if you're not interested,” he says as I push for 10 and finish my sets for today.

“Grahh!” I grunt as I put the bar back on the rack.

I answer his question. “I don’t think so. I mean, it’s complicated.”

“Okay,” he says in understanding. “Besides that, let’s call it a day here.”

Oh, how right he is. My body is aching more than pumped now that I’ve pushed my limits even further. I grab the disinfectant the gyms leave by the equipment and wipe off my sweat and loose fur from the seat.

“Yeah let’s hit the showers,” I say walking with him to the locker room.

“You need a shower; you smell like musk city,” he says waving his paw in front of his nose.

I laugh a bit after I smell my pits. Then I take a sniff nearby him.

“Well you smell like the locker room hasn’t seen the janitor in two games,” I retort.

We both laugh merrily and head to the locker room together.

Inside there are other guys. Some of them chatting about working out, others about work, very few that are from a school like us. At least based on looks alone. I peek over to see some of the men taking a shower. Even though I can only see their bare backs and the curve to their tushes, it was still distracting in an attractive way even though I’m not really the slutty type.

Kev and I head to the locker where our bags are. He puts in his combination and opens the locker. He tosses me my bag and I catch it. I take out my shampoo and the personal towel I brought today. I start stripping my clothes until I was butt naked. The showers here are stall-like, unlike the ones at school. Before I enter my stall I stare at Kev as he strips down. To his chiseled chest displaying, to his rock-hard abs, I didn’t watch past him taking his pants on.  Even though I had something for him, I’m going to respect his privacy. Before he notices I enter my stall and turn on the warm water, hitting me in a spray.

That is until Kev shouted over the showers. “Cold water first, then warm. Gotta cool the body down from the heat then relax.” He says, imitating the coach.

“But coach I don’t bode well to cold,” I said in my fake-teenage whine.

He grunts and says, “No buts, Shepwood. If you don't want to keep panting and dripping drool, then you best cool off your body first,” he says as he enters the stall right by.

I turn the water to cold as the “Coach” suggested. I let the water hit my whole body. I’m actually less used to this than most people. Of course, playing sports for so long and all of my coaches saying the same thing means I would have a tolerance to cold water. I just don’t like it sometimes. Anyway, I get my towel wet and pour some shampoo on it. I lather up and start with my neck, and afterwards, the smelly parts. After washing my upper abdomen I grab my tail and hold down the base of it and let the suds soak into the thicker part of it. I scrub the rest of my body until I was completely white from the torso down. I rinse my tail off first. If I were to say so myself, I would have found it embarrassing having my mom teach me how to wash my tail properly. Now it’s natural. After I rinse off the rest of the soap from my body I turn the water from cold to warm and stand there massaging my muscles for a bit. After a good 4 minutes of soaking in warm water, I turn the water off and shake my whole body. My tail fluffs up from the absence of the water. I get my hands wet from the shower head and sort of grease it down. I comb my hair with my fingers and dry my body with the towel hanging from the outside of the door. I dry off and exit the shower with the towel tied around my waist.

Eventually, Kev exits his stall, following suit. He meets up with me near the lockers and we both get our clothes out and change. Upon changing Kev brought up the love interest conversation again.

“Hey Dex, about the dating thing.”

Before he can continue, I interrupt him. “It’s fine. To be honest, I don’t think I will ever find love, let alone a date. I just don’t think I’m really someone to go after.” Before I can put my pants on at all, Kev takes hold of my shoulders and thrusts me into the lockers. It isn’t a loud crash, but it is loud enough to make a clunk! noise. He glares at me as if I had insulted his mother.

“Don’t you ever say anything like that!” He shouts only inches from my face. This reaction makes me flush immensely, and I am, sure enough, getting an odd arousal. But, this isn’t the time and I try my best to resist it.

“You are my friend Dex. Don’t ever underestimate yourself! I don’t care if it takes you until you're in a retirement home, Dex, but you will find someone. Even if it’s not now.”

“Y-yeah I guess,” I say under a breath. He immediately lets me go and I pull up my pants and finish getting dressed.

“Sorry that I got a little frisky with you Dex, I just hate seeing you doubt yourself. It’s not like you.”

But does he really know about me? I know it was a joke that night but he did say that he knew that I had fallen for him. He should know that this is different. Completely different.

We finish up in the locker room and put our stained workout clothes in our bags and leave the gym.

“Hey Dex, feeling like the park now? It’s best to clear your mind there. If you really haven’t, I mean.”

I understand that he’s trying to help, the park could be helpful. But, I don’t want to be rude. “Sure let’s go there.” Without another word, I step in the car, and we drive off.

The ride to the park is silent. Not even a sigh is said. I am really looking like a pile of shit now, but I didn’t mean for it to be this way. I don’t want to blame Kev for mentioning it as he was just curious. Damn it, I’m so conflicted about this whole thing.

At the park, we take the normal route that people took. On the left side about 3 to 4 feet away there is a running path for people trying to get some outdoor cardio. I honestly prefer the outdoor smells than the plastic and metal smell inside the gym. Along the way there are people, both human and anthro, having fun, talking, and sitting down for picnics on the hills. The straight couples at the park holding hands, kissing and snuggling up close saddened me a little..

Kev elbows me as we make it to the halfway mark on the path we’re on. “Hey Dex, you okay?”

I can’t hide it anymore; I have to be truthful to him. “No! No, I’m not.” I hold my head and walk off to a park bench to sit.

“Hey wait up!” He shouts chasing me.

He joins me on the bench, sitting as close as he can while making himself comfortable. He puts his paw on my back and asks, “Are you sick? A headache?”

I shake my head no.

“Then what is it? You can tell me anything Dex.”

Why is he pretending he doesn’t know unless he really doesn’t? But mentioning being gay won’t hurt. Will it?

“You know already Kev.” I whimper a bit.

“Know what?”

“That I’m…gay.” I mumble the last part, almost inaudible for him to hear.

“You’re what? Just say it to me. I won’t be mad. I won’t judge. I will try to fully understand.” He rubs my back a bit. “Now chin up and tell me what you said.”

“I…” I choke out. I take a breath and stay calm. I say out “I’m gay” casually.

There is dead silence for some time. The moment dragged and lurched sporadically, as my mind both raced and stopped its train of thought intermittently in preparation of Kev’s next words.

“Oh. I see. Like I said I'm not gonna judge. I just wish you told me sooner, man.” He says taking his hand off my back and looking down.

Wait, he didn’t know?!

“Wait, you mean you didn’t know? I thought you knew the other night when you said I fell for you.”

He looks up confused. “What? No! I was drunk and barely understood what we were talking about. I say tons of bullshit when I’m buzzed, but I never knew you were...that way.” He says while lowering an opened palm at me. He puts his head back down, giving a slight chuckle and arched eyebrows.

“In that case that makes me feel better, but honestly that’s not the main reason why I’m down.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean that I am disheartened about the whole dating thing. I mean I haven’t had a date ever since senior prom, and we both know those are usually hangouts, not dates.” I try not to let the words choke myself, restraining me from further embarrassment. “My whole life I’ve been living a lie, Kevin. I don’t want to be ridiculed for being who I am, so I pretended to be...not me. Kev...  I’m confused and discouraged. The couples, the dates, everything I see; it is just hard to accept the fact that this is how it is going to be. That I'll grow up in a world meant for straight people.”

Kev was at a loss for words. He might have felt regret for bringing up something that sensitive. I could see it in his tucked-in arms disappearing between his legs. I’ve told the gist of all of my problems, and I felt better doing so.

Before either of us could speak up and cut the tension, there was a cough, and two people in front of us were looking our way. One of them was a leopard in an ill-fitting jacket, drooping pants, and an off-white shirt with some worn sneakers. The other figure was a stunning onyx black tiger, wearing a coal black three-piece with a red polka dot tie, his shoes were pretty well priced Stacy Clefs, his claws were barely dulled to legal standards, but his crimson eyes were the most alluring detail, staring endlessly at me. Not in intimidation, but intense focus. The leopard speaks up after the moment of silence between us.

“Hey, Shepherd, are you okay?” The leopard asks.

This is entirely random, but I admire that he cares, but then again, strange to see him come out of nowhere and ask that. “Oh, hello. Nothing wrong here, just the...motions I’m going through,” I say nervously, an obvious lie leaking from my words as they neared the end of my sentence.

“I would like to help, Shepherd, and I won’t judge you for whatever it is.” He says with care. I don’t know if I should share my feelings with these strangers, but the black tiger is giving me a strange vibe. I wish I could explain it.

“Kid,” the tiger says in a deep tone, “we both know something is wrong, I can see the struggle in your eyes. What’s your name if you can tell me that?”

“Dex Shepwood. My problem is finding a relationship; not like it matters much seeing how I’m most likely going to be single all my life. I mean I’m still in college and I haven’t even dated anyone. At this point why should I care?”

“Still a child,” he says so low that I could barely make it out. The leopard puts his paw on his shoulder and whispers to him. Whatever he has said to do so, the tiger tenses down and gives off a calmer composure.

“My name is Tajime Kindi. And I know exactly how you feel, Dex.”

He gestures me to follow him before he begins to walk away from Kev and his friend.

“Tajime, be careful how you talk to him,” his friend tells him.

“Derek, trust me on this! I know what I’m doing.”

What does he mean? Is he going to disclose some shocking information, possibly in an attempt to save the world from the clutches of a supervillain, and he wants me to join him? Probably not, but daydreaming about it certainly helps lighten the internal mood.

“Let’s talk somewhere more private,” he notes. “Not too distant, only far enough for you to feel comfortable.”

Kev looks at me, smiling a soft grin, before silently approving me to accompany Tajime on our private saunter.

We only walk about thirty feet away from where we were originally.

“Okay, what is it?” I ask as we reach our stop.

“About what your feeling. It’s fine to feel this way because not all things come easily. Especially when it comes to a relationship.”

“Hmph,” I scoff. “How would you know? You’re some guy I’ve met once now, and you’re trying to tell me about something you most likely don’t understand. You don't understand it because, in case you didn't know already, you are not me.”

“Don’t assume I don’t know things, kid. I’ve been through plenty of trials of being single for many years, and when I came into each of my several relationships, I left each partner. Each one a failure due to either of two main things. They either cheated on me or they went after my money.”

“So what? You’ve been in a relationship; you have experience that I don’t have. What’s it to you if I find love?”

He stays calm but raises his voice a little. “Because the last thing you need to do is rush and make the relationship spoil from impatience.”

He is right about one thing: I was harping on about when I would find a date. Though it may be foolish, I should just tell him that I'm gay. Just like I told Kev earlier. He'll see that his experiences are meaningless because all he had were girlfriends or something along those lines.

“Well, I’m special, though. I’m not like most other people. I go through something completely different Tajime.”

“I think that every day.”

Wait, is he also gay? No need assuming, but the only thing to do now is to ask. I should tell him first though as previously planned.

“I have a secret that I’ve been keeping from most of my friends, and I find it silly that I keep it from them.” I stare at the concrete sidewalk.

“I’m not nosey, so I won’t ask what.”

“No, I’ll tell you, but I want to hear something you’re not telling me, like why you really care.”

“Deal,” he says, looking amused.

I walk closer until I'm about six inches from his whole figure. I feel my stomach wrench up in hesitation again, but I won’t let it cloud my judgement.

“I’m...homosexual. That’s why I make it such a big deal,” I say, avoiding his gaze. I hear a chuckle then a bit of eye-opening laughter from Tajime.

“That’s it?” he wonders. “For a second, I thought you were going to tell me something deeper than that. I see how you could feel that way.” He puts his handpaw on my shoulder.

“It’s fair to tell you why I care.” He leans into my ear, his warm breath tickling the fur on my cheeks. “I’m also gay.”

Shocked, I blurt out a “R-really?!” before he puts a finger to his maw signaling to be quiet. He's gay as well! Maybe he can be the one I've been waiting for all this time! The prospects have come in my favor once again. Then, he opens his mouth to put that dream out of its misery like a sickly, molting bird.

“Now don’t get any ideas, kid. I’ve just been through a terrible breakup. I have no interest in dating anyone right now.” Those words slice open my heart from chamber to chamber. I have thought I can at least see definitively what it’s like to be on a date with another guy. Alas, that goal is blocked from reaching maturity.

“Oh, I understand, Tajime.”

“It’s all fine and good. Just know this, Dex: you are not alone. If you need another gay person to talk to, just call me when I'm not at work.” He pulls out a business card with his information and times he's unavailable. Taking work, sleep, and food into account, that still leaves almost 60 hours a week he's free to talk.

“Now let’s head back. It is getting dark.” He pats my shoulder, and we head back to Kev and Derek. Derek, with a worried look on his face,  approached Tajime.

He asked, “What did you guys talk about?”

“W-we talked about-” I hesitated to explain, so Tajime cut in.

“We talked about things pertaining to Dex; it went well and I’m sure it helped very much with his problems. Just a little though.” He glances over and gives me a confident smirk before looking back at the leopard’s face.

“Yeah, that’s what happened, and I’m much happier now.” I give the biggest smile I can attempt. “Tajime helped a bunch.” I directed my large grin at him.

“Hmm. Well, I’m glad things worked out,” he says, raising an eyebrow while the corners of his mouth lift ever so slightly.

“We have to go,” Derek interjects. “It’s getting late. By the way Dev, you have a very good friend in Kev. The best to the both of you in college.” Soon after, Tajime joins him on his walk down the path.

Before they disappear, Kev shouts, “Thanks and have a good night.”

I wave at the pair of big cats helplessly as if they could notice before they take a turn in the distance going into the dimming nightlife.

Today I had thought it was going to end like it typically would for me. Nothing would change, no one would understand me. However, things have changed. I'm growing out of my little shell, even if just slightly, and it boosted my confidence to new heights. Now Kev knows my little “secret”, and I’ve even made a new, gay friend. ‘A very cute, sharp-dressing friend, mind you,’ I think to myself.