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Kassandra

“Fucking Aceh!" I snarl kicking an empty cooking pot across the floor.

I had managed to keep my temper in check while I walked home, but now I was in the privacy of my own home I couldn't keep it bottled up any longer. The pot clanked and clattered as it rolled across the floor, coming to a stop when it hit the wall. I regretted kicking the pot as my foot-paw now throbbed in pain, but my anger helped to stifle it.

It was early yet, around lunch time from what I could guess, but I didn't want to eat. I opted instead to go to bed and stew in my frustration. I lay on the pile of furs and just lay there in the dark, the light from the candles in the other room hidden behind the curtain. I wasn't tired... I was too riled to sleep.

That damned Tiger! Where does he get off bringing up my Grandfather!? It's not my fault that his students can't defend themselves well enough that they don't get clobbered! If it was a real fight that drake would be dead! Surely it's better for them to realise just ho sloppy their skills are now rather than later?! As annoying as it is I can't argue that he has the right to throw me out of the fucking place but... ARRRGH! I don't care if he and Grandfather were friends!

I curl up on myself as I remember him. Grandfather... the only one in the entire world who never abandoned me. We fled Erythea* after the coup; the entire capital ripped apart by the aftermath. The rest of my family died because of the greed of another, because they wanted the throne for themselves. The guards who had participated in the coup captured me, I wasn't strong enough to resist them. They beat me, belittled me and fondled me... I push the memories away.

Grandfather found me; saved me. We fled the capital and the country altogether, and came here to the Tribal Lands. Grandfather led us here; to Zangar. It was here we hid, safe from the danger from the Capital and the coup. I took to my martial arts training with renewed vigour, never wanting to be weak enough to allow a male to touch me ever again. When I would tire I would remember their paws touching me... my anger would swell and I would push myself until I collapsed from exhaustion, even now the memory of it made my blood boil with rage. Grandfather would scold me afterwards, but he would also wrap his arms around me and tell me that everything was going to be all right.

My blood quickly cooled, my anger subsiding, as I remembered that I would never again hear his voice, feel him hug me and tell me that everything was going to be all right. It's been many moons now since he died, he was old and when fell ill he didn't have the strength to recover. It was horrible seeing him like that. So weak and helpless...

I choke back a sob and try and push the memories from my mind. The reminder of his loss making me realise just how alone I am. I weep silently and clutch at the furs I sleep upon so tightly that my blunt claws threaten to rip them. My salty tears roll down my muzzle into the furs beneath me, making the furs damp and matted. All I have to comfort me is my own scent which permeates the room.

I miss you Grandfather... why did you leave me alone?

I pull myself from my pit sometime later that day. My stomach was growling at me, breaking the heavy silence I lay in, my hunger prevented me from sleeping any more than I had. It had been a restless sleep, full of dreams that already were fading from my memory. The trails on my muzzle left by my tears made my scales feel crusty and horrible, but my stomach growled loudly and drew my attention back to it.

I hadn't eaten since my meal with Laguna yesterday... that annoying drake; always far too cheerful for his own good! While I do appreciate his company his overly cheery nature grates on me. No one could be that cheerful all the time... especially not when I'm throwing insults his way, which do occasionally make his smile falter. No one would put up with that amount of shit, and I know I'm not being nice to him, but I can't help but suspect he has an ulterior motive by trying to get close to me.

I'd wager coin that he just wants to fuck me. That's all that males really think about!

Even Grandfather would go on at me about finding a nice drake to settle down with! No... that's not fair on Grandfather... he just wanted to see me happy, but of course to him that meant finding a male that I could tolerate enough to allow him to fuck me every now and again in order to get pregnant. I see how happy motherhood can make other females, and I suspect that's what he had in mind for me, but that's not the life for me.

No... I swore revenge on those who slaughtered my family. But here I am...stranded in the mountains with no hope of ever being able to achieve that goal. I would need a small army in order to even have a chance... and where would I get an army? I can barely stand to be around the one drake that even comes close to being considered a friend.

I sigh heavily to myself before pushing aside the curtain into the main living area of my small home. The candle I had lit earlier had gone out, which meant I had slept for a few hours at least. I fumble around in the darkness, roughly aware of where I am and where I need to go.

I curse out loud as I stub my foot-paw on the cooking pot I'd kicked across the room earlier, it clanked loudly in the darkness and rolled across the stone floor. I ignored it and went about what I needed to do. I lit another candle, which gave me enough light to at least be able to get a fire going.

Once the fire was lit it warmed the room quickly and filled it with warm light. But I still felt the cold shiver of loneliness as I sat there waiting for the pot of soup I was making come to the boil. I hadn't been to the market place yet since I returned, so it was really more of a weak broth made from some preserved meat I had left. I could have just eaten the meat and been done with it, but I wanted something warm in my belly. I'd eaten meals like this before, not very tasty, but enough seasoning could make it bearable.

I'd go shopping tomorrow, after I go and collect my pay. I could have done it today but I'd been so angry about what happened at the dojo I'd forgotten. Right now I just want to fill my belly and go back to sleep. Hopefully tomorrow will be better than today.