Silver Harmony

Fic: Where Lines Converge

2016-03-05T00:55:46Z

Happy birthday jc and Vi!

So this piece came about because I wanted to give jc & Vi something for their birthdays, but I think we were all in a misawa slump at the time ... lol ... then I discovered that they're really into their OCs at the moment, so I did my best to study the character sheets jc had (along with the long LINE chats we had on the topic) and here we are. I hope I've done your characters justice, guys!!

Title: Where Lines Converge
Author: Harmony (Silver Harmony)
Characters/Pairing: Xu/Pan
Rating: PG
Word Count: Approximately 1,000.
Disclaimer: Xu and Pan belong to jc and Vi, respectively!
Summary: Xu gets it.

****

He isn't petty. He gets it.

He understands Pan's occasional habit to leave exam preparations and essays to the last minute. Last week, a mini-test on superantigens; this week, a written paper on light therapy for skin diseases. Dinner four days ago had been dusted with Pan's colorful rambles about it, how little time he always seemed to have to do everything. That's why you shouldn't put things off, Xu had murmured, furtive smile pulling at one corner of his mouth, heaving chest warm with something more than just a little fond; because Pan is Pan, and he knows that.

He understands that it's not easy when the ground that Pan and his parents stand on together is sometimes a touch cracked and shaky in places; that when Pan's mother starts fussing about anything it means that phone calls will pepper all waking hours, and Pan will have to travel home to visit her and loosen her taut strings, or she'll be knocking at her son's door day after day to make sure he's walking a smooth and crystal-clear path. Which she's been doing all week, and Xu can't help but marvel at Pan's thick skin and patience.

He understands that Addey and Pan's other friends deserve a slice of him too, and that when he's downed by studies and family they miss him, miss his sunlit cheer, miss his pearl-toothed grin. And Xu can't begrudge that they'll pounce on Pan's back to get any small shard of his remaining time that they can get, because it's what Xu himself is aching to do, too.

He loves Pan, and he gets it.

Doesn't mean that his stomach doesn't clench and his toes don't curl whenever Pan's left with less time to spend with him.

A touch of warm fingertips coiling beneath Xu's knees and soft breathing, sliding in and out in silent rhythm, threading through slips of his hair. Lips pressing hot and dry against his temple, a kiss fragranced with inexpensive rum; a solid shoulder and smooth jersey knit beneath his cheek, carrying a residual tendril of someone else's leftover cigarette smoke. Bleary-eyed with a head full of cotton wool, but Xu stirs awake knowing he's been picked up and is being carried someplace, bridal-style. Pan's finally back.

'Hey,' Xu's throat scratches out, still rough and heavy with sleep.

'Hey, you.' The response is musical, notes chiming in tender shades of affection, in hints of crooked smiles. 'What were you doing at your desk. Were you up waiting for me?'

'... Ah ... yeah.' Bent knuckles tuck beneath the rims of his glasses, and Xu rubs at his eyes with a stifled yawn. 'It's fine, though, I was working on my billboard media presentation anyway—'

He's suddenly laid down onto a mound of soft covers and a firm mattress; Pan slowly leans over, wisps of long hair licking at Xu's collarbone. 'Stay here,' he says with a touch of amusement, tracing loose fingers down the line of Xu's jaw. 'I'll be right back.'

Xu nods, and his eyes flutter closed again. Footfalls shuffle against a stretch of carpet, and a deep rustle heralds his heavy jacquard curtains sweeping open; pale sunlight washes the back of his eyelids fire-red. More footfalls, and then a whir of movement in the kitchenette outside the bedroom. A weighty pop of the refrigerator door, grains rattling against porcelain, a knife against a chopping board in uneven metallic beats. All of it a lullaby, mulled and slow.

Lingering sleep and fragments of the week's insecurities ghost over the back of his neck, demure waves gliding in and out, and Xu has to shake his head once, shake it all away from his grit-dried eyelashes and drooping mouth. '... How was the party?' he asks, swinging his legs over and working them underneath the blankets.

'Sufficiently wild,' is Pan's too-merry answer, called out from beyond the bedroom. 'Maybe a little too wild. I'm beat.'

'That's what happens when you stay out all night, though.'

'I ... uh, sorry.'

He sounds genuinely apologetic, and a coolness throbs at the edges of Xu's belly; he wonders if some of his uneasiness has bled through without him knowing. 'I didn't mean it that way,' he sighs, slow and careful, but he means it. 'I want you to have a good time.'

'I know,' says Pan, and his voice is at the doorway now, light and easy, rich with the echo of a full grin.

Xu's eyes slide open to the sight of a tray being pushed in his direction. Cereal, yogurt, coffee, cherries, slices of peach. The cool spots turn into prickles of heat, and he can't help but laugh.

'Breakfast in bed,' he says, and the back of his mouth is warm and sweet. 'I feel like a prince.'

'Good,' Pan smirks, leaning over to plant a sloppy peck on the tip of his nose. 'You are one. And I'll always make time for you, if you want me to. So don't be afraid to claim me whenever you'd like, yeah? I'm sorry it's been such a busy two weeks.'

The tray's solid and weighty on his lap, and before he knows it, fingers are tucking his blankets tighter around his waist, and a palm's curling safe and tight around his own. Pan's here. Xu's missed him terribly, but he's now here. And he always will be; his heart's always here, no matter where he may be, no matter what he may be doing. Maybe, in the darkest corners of his chest cavity, it's something Xu already knows. Just a part of the reason why he's always allowed himself to be more giving whenever Pan needs the time away.

Xu gets it.

He picks up the spoon, and offers Pan a tilted smile. 'That goes two ways. Share with me?'

All they've ever needed to do is meet halfway.

The kiss they share eight minutes later has the flavor of peaches, and it's more than perfect.

Fanfic: Silk Spun In Variations

2015-12-03T18:17:53Z

Wow, it’s been like … nearly half a year since I last posted a fic. It’s about time I posted another one! I’m so tired though wah, I think I’ve been working on this nonstop for two months or something. And it’s monster-length like all my other ones, too. u___u

Written for Yui's birthday on the 30th of November - happy birthday Yui!

Title: Silk Spun In Variations
Author: Harmony (Silver Harmony)
Characters/Pairing: Miyuki x Sawamura
Rating: PG
Word Count: Approximately 11,132.
Disclaimer: Not mine, otherwise this pairing would be canon.
Feedback: Very much appreciated, as I need it to improve. Thank you!
Summary: Miyuki looks at him and grins, looks at him keenly like he sees a pitcher, and Eijun dips his body into the gaze as if it’s sunlight.

( Follow the fake cut over to my Ao3 )
( Or here to my FF.Net. )

Fanfic: Like Hawks Over Eden

2015-07-25T17:05:27Z

Suuuper-late, but late is better than never.

Title: Like Hawks Over Eden
Author: Harmony (Silver Harmony)
Characters/Pairing: Miyuki x Sawamura
Rating: PG
Word Count: Approximately 8,612.
Disclaimer: Not mine, otherwise this pairing would be canon.
Feedback: Very much appreciated, as I need it to improve. Thank you!
Summary: Those two wouldn't know the meaning of subtlety even if their lives depended on it.

( Follow the fake cut over to my Ao3 )
( Or here to my FF.Net. )

Fanfic: Stages Of Trompe-l'oeil

2015-03-24T21:18:04Z

This will probably end up going on record as the oneshot that's taken me the longest to write. Bit by bit for over a month. Holy moly. I'm so glad it's done!

Title: Stages Of Trompe-l'oeil
Author: Harmony (Silver Harmony)
Characters/Pairing: Miyuki x Sawamura
Rating: M
Word Count: Approximately 15,524.
Disclaimer: Not mine, otherwise this pairing would be canon.
Feedback: Very much appreciated, as I need it to improve. Thank you!
Notes: Has scenes involving/mentioning mutual masturbation and sex, but they're pretty mild, hence the light rating.
Summary: He always passes by that unusual deep red bird and finds himself vaguely wondering, in a distant thought, if he’s giving only an illusion of himself. (Set two years post-Seidō - i.e. a few short years in the future, in which they're attending university).

( Follow the fake cut over to my Ao3 )
( Or here to my FF.Net. )

Fanfic: Pas De Deux In Print

2015-01-16T08:55:07Z

Going overseas on vacation next week, so I thought I'd pump out one more fic before I go. This ended up being somewhat challenging to write though - 12.5k words' and 2.5 weeks' worth of struggling! So I hope it's enjoyable to read to some degree.

Title: Pas De Deux In Print
Author: Harmony (Silver Harmony)
Characters/Pairing: Miyuki x Sawamura
Rating: PG
Word Count: Approximately 12,455.
Disclaimer: Not mine, otherwise this pairing would be canon.
Feedback: Very much appreciated, as I need it to improve. Thank you!
Summary: It’s an exquisitely tasteful picture on a disquietingly cold canvas. (Set a few short years in the future, in which they're playing baseball professionally).

( Follow the fake cut over to my Ao3 )
( Or here to my FF.Net. )

Fanfic: Spyglass In Reverse

2014-12-10T11:51:34Z

So I don't write anything for like ... 2-3 years, and then suddenly I write two fics in the space of 3 weeks. What the hell brain.

Coincidentally this is also my 50th upload on Ao3 (I've written more than 50 fics - I just don't post the really bad old ones there, but it's still worth celebrating). So woo!

Title: Spyglass In Reverse
Author: Harmony (Silver Harmony)
Characters/Pairing: Miyuki x Sawamura
Rating: M
Word Count: Approximately 4,259.
Disclaimer: Not mine, otherwise this pairing would be canon.
Feedback: Very much appreciated, as I need it to improve. Thank you!
Summary: In which Kuramochi Youichi repeatedly walks in on things he doesn’t want to see, and doesn’t know what he’d ever done to deserve it.

( Follow the fake cut over to my Ao3 )
( Or here to my FF.Net. )

Fanfic: A Chronicle Of The Sun

2014-11-25T15:03:31Z

Wooooow. Looks like I had terrible writer's block for a full 3 years. I suddenly got the motivation to write though - and I'm deep in baseball hell right now and crazy in love with MiyuSawa - so here you go!

Title: A Chronicle Of The Sun
Author: Harmony (Silver Harmony)
Characters/Pairing: Miyuki x Sawamura
Rating: PG
Word Count: Approximately 6,319.
Disclaimer: Not mine, sadly.
Notes: I haven't read the untranslated chapters (because unfortunately my Japanese isn't all that great), so if anything is out of place because of that, I apologize; I'll fix it as soon as I know about it :)
Feedback: Very much appreciated, as I need it to improve. Thank you!
Summary: This is it, Kazuya thinks; this is the very reason why Sawamura always appears to be so full of sunlight.

( Follow the fake cut over to my Ao3 )
( Or here to my FF.Net. )

RPGMaker Horror Cosplay Picspams

2013-08-30T05:59:32Z

The slow rate at which I'm uploading my cosplay picspams is just getting embarrassing now. But I've managed to get quite a backlog so I figured I should get off my ass and do some!

This time, it's RPGMaker horror games, which I'd grown quite addicted to over the last year. (And if you know me, you'll know by now that I'm a huge horror addict; this was pretty much destined really). So here's our The Witch's House and Ao Oni photoshoots! I'm really hoping to do IB at some point in the future, too.

Thanks Peppanda and Icie for these photos respectively!

The Witch's House: I love this game so much! Played it twice with friends so far and I'd still play it again. It's surprisingly so creepy for a game of its style. This was a relatively simple cosplay for me to put together, although the gore makeup for the gouged-out eyes was a challenge - but a great learning experience! I hope to improve on it though. Damn, why do I love cosplaying scary characters so much haha. Anyway - my blouse was borrowed and I already had the dress in my wardrobe, so all I really had to do was make the head bow (and obviously, the special effects makeup for my gouged-out eyes).

Ao Oni: I still can't believe we did this shoot lol ~ but I'm glad I managed to cosplay such a great loltastic game with an amazing group! Doing Takuro was a lot of fun. (Literally required almost no effort yay, I already had all the clothes in my closet and a wig that was perfect for him).

THE WITCH'S HOUSE PHOTOSHOOT

Harmony/myself as Ellen | tehcrayonofdoom as Viola
Photography by Peppanda and rayfy_chan (thank you!)

(Honestly, tehcrayonofdoom and I flailed when we saw this desk.
It looks so much like the ones from the game! Accuracy FTW!).

(Myself as Ellen! It's hard to pull off a little girl at my age, but I hope I managed :P)

The teddy bears of doom. (They made me jump in the game lol).

I'm a creepy stalker.

Madness setting in.

The chase scene.
(I'm glad my gore makeup for my gouged-out eyes was generally a success! I'll do better next time :D).

The bad end = the true end.

*SPOILERS* And Ellen, trying out her new skin. ;) (This was such a fantastic shot to do. Camera angle tricks FTW!
It was challenging finding an angle where it looks like I'm tehcrayonofdoom's reflection, but somehow we managed it).

BONUS:

(The story behind this shot: I was basically completely blind because of the gore makeup on my eyes and it was super-exhausting to pose in a crawling position for half the photoshoot, so I kind of just faceplanted like that once in a while to rest. Clearly everyone else found this very funny because they took this shot without telling me - I couldn't see a thing!)

AO ONI PHOTOSHOOT

Harmony/myself as Takuro (Version 6) | tehcrayonofdoom as Hiroshi | headdeskben as Takeshi | arlo_arleh as Mika | t8_steve as The Oni
Photography by Icie, Collin and Planeswalkerlx (thank you!).

Takuro and Mika hiding out.

(Yeah, we know they're never really all together in the game except the beginning.
Doesn't stop us from being creative with shots though :P)

(The parts of the game where it was so dark you could only use the lighter were stressful haha.
I suppose the above two shots are dedicated to those moments!).

Takuro's bane.

Takeshi's bane.

Mika's bane.

(This shot was pretty funny to do lol.
t8_steve was blind behind me with his huge mask on and half-confused XD).

*SPOILERS* I'm pretty sure these two shots make sense to those familiar with the game :P
It's the part where Hiroshi puts in the final blue puzzle piece on the wall, lol.

Don't turn around. :P

A very special shout-out to moonblader, alita_b_angel and Gigi who were helpers on these shoots ♥ Thank you so much! It wouldn't have been possible without you.

I'll try to get through the rest of my photoshoots backlog soon! DX Currently I have 4 x Vocaloid, 1 x DBZ and 2 x horror that I haven't posted here yet. So behindddd.

(Remember to add me on deviantART and my Facebook if you haven't already! I'm most active on these two when it comes to cosplay and progress etc.)

~ Harmony

Facebook Page

2013-06-14T06:04:40Z

I ended up joining the cosplay page bandwagon at last, lol. Please add me! :D

silverharmony@facebook

I don’t know how everything works right now so be patient with me haha D:

Thank you so much for all your support thus far! *A*

(And yes, I need to update my LJ more often. I still have a backlog of shoots to post jafshlafha).

Silent Hill Picspam

2013-04-21T23:08:46Z

Oh man. This is so late. Like, months late. But as they say, better late than never, right?

Thanks Brenda for this photo!
2 years after I first did a shoot for this costume, looked at the photos and said "WOW I'M UGLY", I finally managed to re-do my cosplay and hopefully avenge myself lol.

The costume was relatively quickly put together by me a few years ago. Fixed up my makeup and wig, both of which looked absolutely terrible back then, so it's more accurate to Heather this time around. I know this cosplay is far from perfect and that I'm not a great Heather (how do you Caucasian?? LOL), but I do love the SH games intensely, love her as a character and had lots of fun cosplaying her so I hope I did okay.

Anyway, what you're looking at is a photoshoot with about 2 years' worth of planning and organizing behind it. o__O In the end though, it was worth the organizing pain even though I feel like I'm gonna die lol. We have ALL the protagonists - a complete set from SH1 all the way up to Downpour which is currently the last game in the series (except Shattered Memories because it's an alternate universe and it'd be strange to have two Harrys, of course xD) - and the most iconic monsters! Everyone involved in this shoot were so amazing and passionate. I'm really happy to have been able to cosplay one of my favorite game series ever with such a wonderful group of people.

Extra: Entire Pyramid Head costume was made by t8_steve and myself. Travis' vest was also modified and sewn by me.

SILENT HILL PHOTOSHOOT

t8_steve as Harry | aegwynn_aran as James | Harmony/myself as Heather | tehcrayonofdoom as Henry | Mark as Travis | Liam as Alex | rayfy_chan as Murphy
kawak as Pyramid Head | Varia as Bubblehead Nurse | athira as Bubblehead Nurse
Photography by rayfy_chan, ryokophoenix, Brenda, Ron and Liam
Additional photograher: strawbarry_gurl (Lol we haven't got her photos yet so they're not shown here xD)

Note: please bear in mind that because we had so many different photographers on the day, there are truly varying photography styles here. That's why some of the photos have a really different feel from the other photos; this is due to the individual creativity of each photographer.

Here be the protagonists!

Harry: Silent Hill 1. (Yes we know there were no Bubblehead Nurses in SH1. Ssssshhhh.)

James: Silent Hill 2. (With special cameo by Pyramid Head.)

Heather: Silent Hill 3. I'M SORRY FOR MY FACE.

Henry: Silent Hill 4.

Travis: Silent Hill Origins.

Alex: Silent Hill Homecoming. (Also with special cameo by Pyramid Head lurking back there behind the grate).

Unfortunately our Murphy was also one of our photographers lol, he was running around taking photos so sadly there are no solo shots of him. We got him in group shots though!

Also, Pyramid Head.

A few extra shots!

Harry being cornered.

James being - well, more than cornered 8|

Henry in despair.

And everyone all together. INCLUDING MURPHY who was told to put his camera down. XD

I have such a huge backlog of photos to post here ;__; I have 1 x Vocaloid, 2 x other horror cosplays and 1 x DBZ to post after this. I hope I can get off my butt and do them soon DX

~ Harmony

Ao3, Lovesick Dead & Cosplays In Review 2012

2013-01-06T02:00:19Z

Gods I haven't really been here for a while, so busy with work/family. How is everyone going? :) Hope all of you have had a great holiday break and a happy new year! Just a few updates:

Archive Of Our Own

Thanks to moonblader, who sent me an invite, I recently got myself an Ao3 account! I'm very slowly and gradually posting all my fic there. I'm really quite impressed with the archive, it's SO much more user-friendly (and has way more quality fic) than FF.Net. Flist, if you have an account too please send me the link so I can subscribe to you :D In the meantime, here's mine:

harmony@ao3

Lovesick Dead

Last shoot of 2012 (yeah I know, I still need to upload Silent Hill photos here, but since there's a lot of those I'll do that later) was a brief but very special shoot as 2012 marked the 25th anniversary of Junji Ito's work. He's dished out such beautiful horror for 25 years and here's hoping that he'll bring us lots more horror for the years to come!

The shoot was for Junji Ito's Lovesick Dead (also known as Undying Love), with myself as the creepy Intersection Pretty-Boy and tehcrayonofdoom as my Schoolgirl Victim.

Thank you Icie for these photos!

Harmony: 2012 Cosplay In Review

For me, 2012 was a year of Vocaloid and horror (horror is never not fun) with a dash of Torchwood:

Left to Right
1st row: Meiko, Lamento ver. | Meiko, Futari No Harmony ver. | Meiko, Futairo ver.
2nd row: Tomie, school uniform ver. | Tomie, Painter ver. | Meiko, Senbonzakura ver.
3rd row: Tosh (Torchwood) | Heather (Silent Hill 3) *RESHOOT* | The Intersection Pretty-Boy (Lovesick Dead)

Not pictured above: Android #17 from Dragon Ball Z, Cyrus (SMASH! Mascot) military ver., and Meiko Scarlet ver. since they were only worn to cons and I haven't actually done photoshoots for them yet. This cosplay review pertains to photoshoots ONLY and doesn't include costumes worn to cons; once I've done shoots for them I'll include them in my 2013 cosplay in review! :)

So far, concrete plans for 2013 include a shoot for The Witch's House which is next week (I can't resist my horror!), as well as the Androids from DBZ (costumes are long finished, just need photos) and DGM second uniform (although we need to find someone to be our Lenalee). Other possible shoots include Devil May Cry and a bit of Vocaloid here and there which is so not a surprise lol.

Have a great 2013 everyone. :)

~ Harmony

"Allergy Training"

2012-11-03T18:32:09Z

This might seem like a really weird and random entry but I thought I might post this up to record and share my experiences with suddenly developing a food allergy out of nowhere (which apparently happens pretty rarely in adults) and how, strangely and miraculously, I also managed to "cure" myself of it (I think).

I might leave this entry public just in case anyone out there who doesn't know me might want to read it as well.

How it started:

My mom's side of the family has a history of allergies. As I grew up I developed asthma, hayfever and eczema, all of which are allergy-triggered and basically permanent; no cures exist, only drugs to control the symptoms. So I still suffer from all of these. (An allergy specialist has even said to me: "Wow, you're a really allergic person, aren't you?")

So my sister was watching TV one day and she saw a news feature on Billie Goat Soap, a brand of goat's milk soap that was supposedly clearing up people's eczema regardless of the severity. The testimonials for this product all over the Internet were glowing. So for my birthday she bought me a Billie Goat gift set with several bars of soap, moisturizers etc.

The first few times I used one of the bars of soap, it didn't really yield any visible results, but I thought that it might be because it took time and I needed to be patient. And then I used the moisturizer, and I broke out in hives that were extremely, EXTREMELY itchy like you can't imagine, but it subsided fairly quickly (in maybe about an hour). It was my first experience ever with hives in 20+ years - I'd never had them before.

I didn't know it was the moisturizer that caused it at the time, so I used it again on my back, and hives instantly broke out all over my back, hence making it pretty clear as the cause. I went straight to the hospital, where they gave me Phenergan (an antihistamine / anti-allergy tablets) to take right there. I decided not to use Billie Goat products anymore, and thought that was the end of that.

But I ended up developing a cheese allergy.

I wasn't previously allergic to cheese at all. I also found it to be really strange because what brought this on was a goat's milk-based skin product, and I don't eat goat's milk cheese, only cow's milk cheese. Also note that I was only allergic to cheese, not dairy products - I was still able to drink milk and eat yogurt & ice cream just fine. Numerous people have suggested that my body was reacting to the germ in the cheese, and I suppose they must be right.

The development of incidents, starting with an all-wonderful anaphylaxis (severe allergic reaction that can end in death):

- I was eating pizza with friends in a shopping mall when I suddenly got a severe allergic reaction out of the blue. It started with my whole body breaking out in hives, but then my heart was beating really fast, my entire face went swollen and numb, and I lost most of my vision and hearing. My friends called an ambulance for me right away. The paramedics gave me more Phenergan which alleviated the symptoms (I started getting my vision and hearing back while on the ambulance), but I stayed at the hospital for half the night nonetheless.

- I was eating out with friends at a shopping mall again and I ordered a Caesar Salad. After the above incident, my mind didn't connect the dots because I've never heard of anyone being allergic to cheese before, so I was stupid and thought it was the chicken on the pizza (to my memory there was nothing else on the pizza but the chicken and cheese) that caused the anaphylaxis. So I asked for no chicken on the salad, but it still came with shredded cheese. I broke out in hives right there in the food court and had to run to the nearest pharmacy to buy more Phenergan.

- Suspecting it was cheese that was causing my allergic reactions, I got a referral for an appointment with a specialist. Blood samples were taken and several tests confirmed that I was indeed allergic to cheese.

- Eating out with friends again and avoiding all cheese products at any cost, I ordered an iced chocolate. Once again, I broke out in hives (I kept Phenergan ready in my wallet at all times at this stage though) and had to go home right away. This was an isolated case because, as I mentioned before, I was fine drinking milk and eating other dairy products like yogurt and ice cream during the time of all these incidents, so I suspected there might have been some traces of the cheese germ(?) in the milk or ice cream used.

Once again I have to state that before these incidents I wasn't allergic to cheese. I just somehow developed it.

"Allergy training": how I dealt with it

(PLEASE NOTE THAT TRYING ANY OF THESE WITHOUT MEDICAL ADVICE IS DANGEROUS. ONE SMALL MISTAKE CAN EASILY END IN DEATH. PLEASE CONSULT A DOCTOR OR SPECIALIST FIRST)

For a good 1-2 years I just avoided all cheese products altogether. And then one day I came across this interesting article about a form of "training" where an allergic person would be injected with the allergen in controlled doses by a doctor or specialist, with a slow and gradual increase in dosage, until the person in question built up a resistance to the allergen.

Additionally, I also heard an interesting story from someone (it might've been Silver actually) about a friend of hers who was allergic to prawns. He went out to an all-you-can-eat and basically stuffed his face with lots and lots and LOTS of prawns, despite being allergic. He got incredibly sick from it, but apparently after he recovered he wasn't allergic to prawns anymore - the allergy was gone.

These two stories together made me realize that exposure to the allergen could potentially "cure" you of the allergy. I obviously wasn't going to try the second one because of the dangers involved, but I did speak to my doctor about trying the first one at home - I didn't need to be injected with cheese since, you know, I could just eat it.

So I started with a very tiny piece of cheese, a square block 0.5cm x 0.5cm x 0.5cm. I ate one of these blocks every day for about a week. After that I went with a slightly bigger block - about 1cm x 1cm x 1cm in size. Each week, I increased the size of the blocks by just a tiny bit, not too much. And I always had Phenergan ready in case anything went awry (but thankfully I never had to use it while I underwent the "training").

And a few months later, I'm back to eating cheese, although I do keep a cap on it and always try to limit myself from eating too much of it at any one time. Thankfully, no hives or other allergic symptoms from what I can see.

Final thoughts

This whole thing has been kind of strange - again, allergies suddenly developing in adults (that you didn't have while growing up) is apparently not so common, and to add to it I was able to get over said allergy too - but the cheese allergy might have suddenly developed because I'm a really allergic person to begin with. Still doesn't explain the connection to the goat's milk soap though, although I know there must be one (cheese must have something in common to either something in the goat milk or whatever is used to cure the soap / develop the moisturizer).

Anyway, I'm just glad I've gone back to being able to eat cheese now since I love it so much haha. Pizzas, lasagnas, you name it, I can go back to enjoying it. And I'm pretty grateful for my life right now.

If you have any relevant stories, experiences of your own or any thoughts/comments please feel free to comment here as I would love for you to share them with me. Thanks for reading.

Ermahgerd, Turchwad

2012-10-08T00:26:48Z

Sorry I haven't been updating much. Most of you who are on my f-list have me on Twitter though, which I'm on daily, so at least you know how I'm going just from reading my tweets there. XD

Did a Torchwood photoshoot a few months ago - I cosplayed as Tosh and we had a full group. Yep, this is another super-late picspam :/

But hooray for British TV shows! First time cosplaying from one. About time too, since I'm so addicted to them, and to the Doctor Who / Torchwood universe in general.

Thanks rayfy_chan for this photo!
I made Tosh's skirt from scratch and everything else of hers I put together really quickly (my glasses & shoes were 100% accurate to her, for which I'm so glad). It was a pleasure to cosplay & portray her; I love her a lot. And everyone else in my group is so amazing ;A; I was practically screaming when all these photos came back because of how stunning they are. It was an honor to do this shoot with all of them.

Special thanks goes to mis_v who helped me draft a pattern for Tosh's skirt, thus making my life easier when I started making it; and our Suzie tehcrayonofdoom who lent me her wristwatch & skin-colored stockings to complete this costume and also housed me while I sewed my skirt at the eleventh hour xD

TORCHWOOD PHOTOSHOOT

Harmony/myself as Tosh | k_chan009 as Jack | j_plash as Ianto | headdeskben as Owen | Liz as Gwen | tehcrayonofdoom as Suzie
Photography by rayfy_chan

Note: please bear in mind that we're all Australian cosplayers and couldn't fly to Cardiff just to do a hobby photoshoot LOL. In spite of this we did our best shooting at the location we had at our disposal.

Our hawt Captain Swishy-coat.

Beautiful broody Ianto *__*

Our lovely Gwowen pair.

Sexy Suzie ;)

~~I'M NOT BEAUTIFUL ENOUGH TO BE TOSH but oh well, I tried. :'D~~

(I always did have mixed feelings about the Gwowen affair in the show.
But still love the shots that came out of this :D)

Inspired by you all probably know which shot. ♥

(Forever hurting from Towen feels ;__;)

A possible backstabbing in progress. :P

A shot inspired by the 'Combat' episode.

UST!Gwowen. *Waggles eyebrows*

(Had to have this shot, considering Suzie and Owen had a history. xD)

(Lol'ing at that playboy smirk.)

And Torchwood Three all together. ~~Lol please ignore our height differences.~~

My life feels pretty much complete having done not only this photoshoot but a Silent Hill cosplay photoshoot as well, for which we also managed to gather together a full group. Two fandoms I've been more attached to in the last couple of years than anything else! The Silent Hill picspam will be coming next. :)

~ Harmony

I Don't Do Enough Horror Photoshoots.

2012-06-28T03:44:27Z

No, I haven't been cosplaying like a crazy person - apart from going to Supanova I've actually done nothing in these last couple of months. I just have a lot of backlog from past shoots that I haven't posted yet XD

Anyway, here's something a little different - I did a cosplay for Tomie two months ago.

Thanks Icie/rurumi and rayfy_chan for these photos respectively!
I love Junji Ito so much, not even kidding - he's my absolute favorite horror manga author/artist of all time. And I have a love/hate relationship with Tomie, arguably one of his most famous characters ... on the one hand she's a massive bitch and I hate her, and on the other hand she's this amazingly creepy otherworldly entity and I can't get enough of her stories!

I decided to go with an "in-between" version of the school uniform - so this outfit takes elements from both the manga and the live-action movie versions of Tomie. Again, it's an outfit I altered, as I managed to find a vintage-style ensemble for cheap online and just modified it.

(Added note: PLEASE BE AWARE THAT MY BEAUTY SPOT IS ON THE CORRECT SIDE. The earliest Tomie translations flipped the manga to accommodate English readers for left-to-right reading so Tomie's beauty spot on the wrong side in those scans XD)

I've cosplayed solo to cons in the past but this is my first solo photoshoot. I'm so used to shooting in a pair or a group that it was a little intimidating being the sole focus, but I hope the results make up for it.

TOMIE PHOTOSHOOT

Harmony/myself as Tomie
Photography by strawbarry_gurl, Icie and rayfy_chan
Special effects makeup by strawbarry_gurl and rurumi (thank you all!)

(Please excuse any inconsistency in the set of photographs - this is owing to the individual creativity of each of the three photographers and their different visions for the shoot. :D)

Before going on to the main shoot, I did a very quick shoot in a nearby hotel to portray glamorous!Tomie. Anyone who's read the manga knows that Tomie tends to have a habit of sitting in fancy chairs, all dolled-up. One of the illustrations that caught my attention was the cover page for the chapter 'Painter', so I cosplayed it! (Found the perfect top online for $15, made the skirt myself).

Then we moved to a nearby school, where we started on the main shoot. Here, have some normal schoolgirl Tomie. Tomie doesn't get more normal than this.

And every horror story also has that turning point where normalcy is thrown out the window. I love all the scenes in the series where Tomie has a creepy demon head growing out of her, whether in a photograph or in actuality.

We did a sort of re-enactment of the scene in chapter 2 where a classmate takes candid photographs of Tomie just walking by or standing there, and the developed photos have the demon head in them (a great scene!). I was lucky enough to have my team help me edit three versions of the head, with the first one being the very first photo in this entry (scroll up to the top; special edit by rurumi) and the other two below (special edits by strawbarry_gurl and Icie).

And this is followed, of course, by rageface!Tomie and cut-up Tomie. Because we all know that all the guys who get involved with Tomie in some way end up getting an abnormal irresistible urge to carve her up and kill her, and she's often angry about it. (Special cameo by rayfy_chan below. I'll pretend he's a classmate lol).

And it's all just good ol' creepy from here. Fun story: while I was doing the shots below where I lie at the bottom of the stairs (we had the idea to enact a scenario where someone might have pushed Tomie) a lady was walking down the stairs and nearly got a heart attack because I looked legitimately cut-up and dead and all photographers were under the stairs, out of her view LOL. Poor woman. Anyway, enjoy the rest of the shots!

Well, that's it for now. I had a lot of fun on this shoot, and I would like to do more Junji Ito cosplays someday (accompanied by tehcrayonofdoom who is thankfully also a huge Ito fan) lol. I have my eye on you, Remina - and Marusou too! We'll see if we have the time to spare.

~ Harmony

EDIT: Thank you to the Junji Ito Index for featuring this cosplay ♥

Saturdayyy

2012-06-17T01:37:21Z

Hope everyone's having a fun time at Supanova today while I wrap myself in a cocoon of blankets at home and rest XD

Behold my 'blerrrrhhhhh' face from yesterday

Picture stolen from moonblader. Also that's her beautiful moe face on the right.
tehcrayonofdoom and I cosplayed Androids #18 and #17 respectively! I grew up with DBZ so it was awesome to go back to my childhood with this one. MY SISTAH IS SO BEAUTIFULLL.

Doing #17 wasn't nearly as simple as I initially imagined. I was originally going to take the easy way out and do his plain belt version, but at the very last minute my inner cosplay-OCD took over and I ended up making his detailed double belt version (all my lols at him carrying a gun when he can blast people with his finger).

And yes I managed to find his horrible fluro green socks as well! (Very bottom photo. They were expensive, but worth it for the cosplay accuracy). I had to use fabric paint to turn a white pair of canvas shoes blue though, as I couldn't find a cheap blue pair anywhere. And for the pants, I personally wasn't too keen on the idea of using regular jeans like other cosplayers have done because all pictures show his pants as being a really bright blue. So since my mom had a pair of pants like that, I just borrowed off her lol.

And after all that there was the GLORIOUS 90'S HAIR. Styling the wig to give it that extra "boof" was kinda fun and in the process ended up giving me ACCURATE MASSIVE FOREHEAD lol. Tried some new makeup techniques as well to get that angry manface effect X'D

Picture stolen from rayfy_chan.

The con itself

... Was honestly a little bit underwhelming as it was crowded/stuffy and there wasn't that much to do, but it was still great because at least I got to see my beautiful friends (more or less my only reason for going). I pretty much died halfway through though and ended up just chilling out upstairs in the last 1.5 hours or so because I'd only slept like 2ish hours the night before X'D (not sewing or anything, I'd finished everything by then. I just couldn't sleep).

We ran into heaps of other DB cosplayers at the con though, and it was fun taking crack photos with them *__*

It was really awesome that the con was full of DB fans in general as well, because I handed my cosplay card over to everyone who took a photo of us. I brought along 45 cos-cards thinking "meh, I'll only end up handing out a few of these" but I ended up running out of cos-cards to hand out halfway through the con - that's about 3 hours in. That's a lot of DB fans considering I only gave one card to each photographer! Thanks everyone for your support!

Not sure when we'll shoot these outfits as we have to wait for kaiya02 to finish her Trunks outfit first (and we're trying to drag in Bubby/Alan to be our Android #16 lmao). Until then, there's always my 'blerrrrhhhhh' face! >:U

~ Harmony

Forests Galore! ... Yes It's Vocaloid.

2012-06-10T16:03:32Z

All previous Vocaloid cosplays can be found here.

As promised, here are picspams of the last two Vocaloid shoots I haven't posted here yet. Both PVs were set in the forest too, requiring both of them to be shot amongst the trees - and mosquitoes - so since the setting is similar I thought I may as well put them together XD

Thanks moonblader and rayfy_chan for these photos respectively!

Futairo: This was a very simple shoot, but I've been wanting to cosplay this PV for years now because I love the song. It's so pretty ;__; this costume was so easy to put together, it barely required any work at all. Scarf and dress were already available in my wardrobe, I just had to sew lace trim onto the bottom of the dress and a waist-tie at the waistline. Leather cord was also readily available for my wrist and ankle as shown in the original PV.

Lamento: I was very pleasantly surprised to find out that there was a Kaito/Meiko cover of the theme song from the Lamento BL game. Covers of existing songs don't always turn out great but not only was this a pretty cover, it was generally a really pretty PV too! It's strange for them to have chosen KaiMei since Meiko is a girl, but nonetheless it's a lovely homage to the original game. Costume construction was really easy, did most of it in a day or two. Headscarf, faux leather bikini & fingerless gloves made & sewn by me. Ears & tail also made by me. The leather-look shorts were bought. XD

FUTAIRO PHOTOSHOOT
(Based on the Futairo costume designs - final outfit)

Harmony/myself as Meiko | itakoaya as Luka
Photography by moonblader, Bubby and rayfy_chan (thank you!)

Please excuse the inconsistency in the photographs - this is owing to the individual creativity of each of the three photographers and their different visions for the shoot. :)

My beautiful Luka <3

(I like how it could look like I'm looking at something mystical or magical xD).

A song in pictures.

A prayer in song.

(This was an attempted imitation of one of the poses in the PV x'D)

Always reaching out.

Twin colors, side by side.

LAMENTO PHOTOSHOOT
(Based on the Lamento costume designs - final outfit)

Harmony/myself as Meiko | kaiya02 as Kaito
Special thanks to shinomatrix for the help with the tattoo!
Photography by moonblader and rayfy_chan (thank you!).

Sekushii Kaito.

(Excuse my derpface xD)

Inspired by this shot. xD

(Yeah, you better believe I'm sucking in for this shot like my life depended on it! *Belly fats*)

A personal journey.

Comfort within the leaves. <3

A very special shout-out to rurumi who was a helper on both of these shoots ♥ it wouldn't have been what it was without you. And thanks heaps to everyone else who was involved!!

Well, that's the last bit of Vocaloid backlog for now. These photos are actually a few months old (yeah, I'm posting late again) - haven't shot any more Meiko since. xD Until next time! :)

~ Harmony

More Vocaloid Picspams

2012-05-21T02:12:38Z

All previous Vocaloid cosplays can be found here.

I haven't really been posting many entries here because everything in my life's been pretty dull and not worth posting/reading XD but at least I've done a few shoots since the last entry so I can finally start picspamming here again. Sort of.

One of them is a super-cute Vocaloid PV called Futari No Harmony (eng. title Twosome Harmony), which I've loved for ages, so it was a pleasure to shoot this <3

Thanks rayfy_chan for the photography!
It's a really cute song and whimsical PV. When I set out to make this cosplay I was sadly unsuccessful in finding a sheer fabric that I was 100% happy with in terms of color D: so I ended up having to hunt down a smock/dress, and I found this gem. It was floor-length but had an empire waist and perfect sleeves like in the PV, and was such a lovely shade. It was also 40-50 years old 8'D (I know that people who love vintage dresses are gonna kill me right now for admitting to cutting one up for a cosplay ... sorry! If it's any consolation, I'll most likely rewear the dress IRL since it's cute *3*). I did minor alterations to it like cutting off the length and adding the big bow on the back, but that was it really. Nice and easy.

We tried to copy most of the main shots from the PV, and then we did a few playful ones of our own, all of which you'll see below. Hope we did it justice! XD

FUTARI NO HARMONY PHOTOSHOOT

Harmony/myself as Meiko | kaiya02 as Kaito
Photography and amazing edits by rayfy_chan | 2nd photographer moonblader | shoot helper rurumi (thank you all!)

Nothing like a warm cup of tea ~ ♥

Rabu *3*

We called this the "family portrait" shot (because I looked like such a wife lol)

Tried to imitate Meiko's phone shot, but everyone preferred a "girly phone hand" XD
So here it is. Meiko's original phone shot with an added girly phone hand.

Behold my HAIYAH WAT U DOING MAN face.

A twosome in harmony.

And of course, the main shot from the PV! 8D

Also, behind the scenes, we discerned that we looked like couples from Korean TV Dramas. I swear it's the clothes.

EDIT 21 OCTOBER 2012: Decided to edit this entry to include a photoshoot from August, since I didn't feel like making a new entry for it lol. Senbonzakura group shoot go ~

Thanks rayfy_chan for the photography!
My lovely Senbonzakura teammates are also my Secret Police teammates whom I shot with last year so this might end up being a yearly tradition? Lol. I made my entire costume except for the boots. Wasn't hard to make, so not much else to say about it really. :) On to the pics!

SENBONZAKURA PHOTOSHOOT

Harmony/myself as Meiko | eightroses as Miku | Blackcrane56 as Kaito | mitarashidango as Rin | alysael as Len
Photography by rayfy_chan, shinomatrix and Pandori (thank you all!)

Miku-bossu ~

Our adorable doll-like Rin :D

Our cute Len.

Ikemen Kaito is ikemen.

Me, as Meiko (as usual!).

The standard Senbonzakura pose haha.

(We don't know what we were thinking when we did this shot LOL).

Everyone on the move. :D

Haven't got any more Vocaloid shoots planned yet but keep an eye out - might get some more in soon!

~ Harmony

New Cosplay Tumblr + WorldCosplay

2012-02-05T14:40:09Z

Tumblr

I noticed recently that the username "silverharmony" finally got freed up on Tumblr (someone else was using it before). So naturally, I quickly made a grab for it xD yay!

silverharmony@tumblr

A number of you are already following me on my current Tumblr (account name "harmonization"). As of now please consider "harmonization" as my personal/fandom Tumblr, and "silverharmony" as my cosplay Tumblr.

From now on, I'll be posting my cosplay-related stuff on the "silverharmony" one so I can separate it from the fandom spam I normally do on the "harmonization" account. I'm going to start uploading a small number of old favorites first (and what better to start with than some Eyeshield 21?), and then most/all of the newer and newest ones.

I know that a few people from deviantART as well as here on LJ followed me on "harmonization" already, so if you originally preferred to see only cosplay posts instead of my fandom/personal posts and reblogs, you're most welcome to follow me on the new account and unfollow me on the old one if you wish :) or if you're happy to follow both, you're obviously most welcome to too XD

WorldCosplay

I made this account when the site first started up but I never uploaded anything on it because I was so lazy lol. I just started uploading stuff onto it today and hopefully I'll get into the habit of uploading over there.

harmony@worldcosplay

Will follow my friends back, so please either follow me or let me know what your account is so I can follow you?

Love to you all, hope you're doing well.

Cheers!

~ Harmony

2011 Cosplays In Review

2012-01-06T02:30:26Z

Belated Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year, everyone!! How have you all been? Sorry, I haven't been online that much lately (I've even been neglecting Twitter, which is where I normally spend most of my time) and thus I'm way behind on reading all your journal entries. But I'll make more of an effort from now on.

Wanted to do a 2011 review of all my cosplays as I did for 2010 last time. :) 2010 was a crazy year in which I was super-enthusiastic and I ended up doing 18 photoshoots ... 2011 I had less time to sew costumes (considering one of them, the Trinity Blood one, was a huge project), so I ended up with much less.

Click here for my cosplay review of the previous year (2010).

Left to right
First row: Meiko, Venomania ver. | Rei (Fatal Frame III) | Meiko, siGrE ver. | Meiko, Secret Police ver. (Vocaloid)
Second row: Meiko, Yumemiru Kotori ver. (Vocaloid) | Fuji (Prince of Tennis) | Morinaga (Koisuru Boukun) | Robin, Sabaody ver. (One Piece)

Not included: Cyrus of the SMASH! Mascots (which I still need to edit photos of sorry 8D;;), Suzuna from Eyeshield 21 (which I still need to get photos back for) and my default Meiko reshoot (which I'm not sure if I should include since it's a reshoot lol). Will update this list when those are done! There's also the fashion shoot that I modeled for recently, but since that's a regular shoot and not a cosplay, I didn't include it in the list.

This cosplay review pertains to photoshoots ONLY and doesn't include costumes worn to cons. Therefore Heather (Silent Hill 3) and Seth (Trinity Blood) will be included in the 2012 list, once I've done a reshoot and shoot for them respectively! :)

Shoots to look forward to in 2012:
A horror cosplay which I'll do soon ;)
Silent Hill group shoot (as Heather and God)
Torchwood group shoot (as Tosh)
Another variation of Cyrus (this one maybe? XD)
Various Vocaloid versions

I haven't sewn any costumes since Seth. I've been so lazy :/ that was in August! It's the 5th month now lol. (Or maybe that's an indication that I'm getting a life? Haha).

Happy 2012 everyone :)

~ Harmony

Fashion Shoot + Brisnova Aftermath

2011-11-23T08:54:12Z

Two entries in one day, woah. But I thought it was time. I've been writing and posting so much fanfiction in the last 2 months that it was really time to start posting photoshoots again :)

The latest shoot that I've gotten the photos back for is actually not a cosplay, but a fashion shoot, with lolita-inspired outfits designed and made by the lovely mis_v (thanks for asking me to be your model darling! It was an honor to wear your gorgeous collection in front of the camera). This is actually my first time modelling someone else's work, instead of my own ... it's a good learning experience and actually has a different feel from modelling the cosplays I've made myself.

Thank you rayfy_chan for your lovely photography!
The only three photos I'll post here because unfortunately I look derpy in all the other shots. Haha.

Brisnova Aftermath

As I mentioned a few entries ago, I'd decided to go to Brisnova, which ended up being an amazingly fun trip. My primary reason for going was to see Colin Morgan and Billy Boyd, both of whom were incredibly sweet and so, so nice. Got both their autographs! So no regrets. Apart from them the convention itself was mostly kind of boring (sorry lol), but I got to spend time with awesome people, so that made up for it.

Highlights of the Brisnova experience:

- Staying at j_plash's remarkable mansion! (Thank you sweetheart for being such a wonderful host and letting me stay under your roof while I was there). And thanks for letting us watch the latest Merlin downstairs too. It was fun giggling with everyone about every piece of subtext in the most hilarious episode possible =P IN A LAND OF MYTH AND A TIME OF MAGICCC

- Sleeping in our downstairs 'Asian hub' with rurumi, moonblader, amenokitarou, psycho_kyugurl, and sansele, telling ghost stories at night or laughing about Dreamy Creamy Steamy, or doing hilarious life quizzes while drinking tea in the ungodly hours of the night. I love you all and I feel so much closer with all of you after this. I wouldn't have traded this for the world.

- Our music jam sessions! Thanks Will for letting me be a part of your compostional performance. And k_chan009 & princealy for making Titanic hilariously epic (I'll never look at it the same way again). And all three of you, along with Christie, J and zimiel, for our fun LotR singalongs!

- Meeting new people. Gods, I met so many new people on this trip, made so many new friends, including rallamajoop, ryokophoenix, Blair, Chantelle and many others. And along with that, I got to reunite with old ones that I basically never see - namely sinnatious, who hung around with me while I was bored and had nothing to do, and kept me sane! Thanks for that hun, I really appreciated your company! ♥ I just hope I didn't bore you while dragging you around everywhere.

- Our Game of Thrones car, in which it became tradition to fangirl about GoT and play/sing the theme song whenever we climbed in. Deng deng deng deng! After this trip I'm doomed to have the theme song permanently stuck in my head.

- The trip there and back with Christie and aegwynn_aran ... especially the train trip after our flight home, which involved all of us running from one train platform to another as the train pulled in, yelling "FAAAAAAAAARK!" XD

- And general funtiems like hunting for kue lapis with K, Aly, Jill and Kyu. XD

I was so happy to be able to go on a convention trip that wasn't about the cosplay - I did cosplay to the con, but it certainly wasn't the focus of the con or the trip as a whole and it was great to just be able to hang out with my friends. And, yes, meet my favorite TV/film stars. It was my first ever trip to Brisbane, but considering how much I enjoyed it, it probably won't be my last.

And that ends the con season for the year. Thanks to everyone for making it so amazing and memorable!

~ Harmony

One Piece Shabondy / Sabaody Picspam

2011-11-23T07:46:28Z

This is so, so late. Really sorry DX we did this photoshoot the day after Animania (where we actually wore these cosplays), which was a couple of months ago lol.

Thanks Quake for these photos!

Robin's Sabaody outfit was super-easy - it was really just alteration work on the top that I did in one day (sewing on the printed collar and the belly-chain etc). I already had the purple cowboy hat readily prepared from when I made her default outfit ages ago. The hardest part was just finding pants in the same color as the top & hat XD

I've seen cosplayers do this outfit in both purple and black, and decided on the purple palette since the anime colors were fairly purplish and it's very much Robin's color anyway.

ONE PIECE SHABONDY (SABAODY) PHOTOSHOOT

Harmony/myself as Robin | Jeremy as Luffy | Frances as Nami | Luke as Zoro | xiao_huli_chan as Sanji | rayfy_chan as Usopp | minhhhhh as Franky | Winnie as Brook | Chopper as himself!
Photography by Bubby and Quake (thank you!).

Our lovely navigator.

(Boys will be boys xD)

Usopp is ready for more adventuring.

The epic crew!

SUUUUUPAAAAAAAAA

Sanji gets all the ladies.

A thoughtful Luffy.

Zoro action shot!

The bounty on everyone's heads.

Awesome Straw Hats are awesome. xD

Also, the obligatory bonus .gif:

A very special thank you to my group - this was one of the most fun cosplay groups I've ever been invited to be a part of!

After this I'll post a Brisnova aftermath entry, which is also late (sorry :P).

~ Harmony

Fanfic: Generations Of Brilliance (Godric & Eric)

2011-11-21T14:03:16Z

My other Godric/Eric fics: In Understanding | Sanctuary | What You Love Most | Beyond All Telling

(Note: This fic was formerly named "Two Sides". I've since changed the title because I felt like this one fit better.)

Fifth and final True Blood fic request. Phew! This one is for sabbrielle from the Godric/Eric community, who gave me the prompt of 'hands'. :)

Please be aware that all the Godric/Eric fics I've written so far fit into canon and can thus be considered part of the same universe if you so wish. ♥

Title: Generations of Brilliance
Author: Harmony (Silver Harmony)
Characters/Pairing: Godric & Eric, Pam
Rating: PG
Word Count: Approximately 1,514.
Disclaimer: Not mine, sadly.
Notes: It isn’t explicitly stated in the series when Eric was promoted to Sheriff, so I took it upon myself to choose a date that was sometime after Godric’s promotion – hence, this fic is set around the late 1920s. (If it’s ever outlined in future episodes, I’ll alter this fic accordingly).
Feedback: Very much appreciated, as I need it to improve. Thank you!
Summary: Godric visits Eric at his new office.

***

When Godric comes around to the new office, he observes it to be surprisingly cozy despite its relatively small dimensions; it's currently empty and almost completely unfurnished, with unpacked boxes sitting in the corner and a thin layer of dust covering the singular desk in the middle of the room. Even as he had first come up the worn, grey stairs, he could hear Pam’s drawling chatter in one of the adjoining rooms, Eric’s own instructive murmurs accompanying the shuffle of feet against a bare floor, the faint crackle of a record player spinning a dulcet Al Jolson ballad on low volume. There’s an unexpected homeliness to it all, in no small part owed to the occupants; he can’t have felt more at home than when he spots his progeny for the first time in weeks, crisp white suit open and shirt buttons halfway undone, his face and shoulders relaxed and comfortably easy as he’ll always be.

Eric is supervising the move of a bookshelf into the room when the dark-haired vampire arrives at the door, and those eyes light up with a glimmer immediately the moment they meet his own; one signaling wave of the blond’s large hand and his new vampire subordinates are promptly leaving the bookshelf by the nearest wall and filing out in obedience.

'It's a nice place,' Godric utters approvingly, looking around the room.

Eric scratches the back of his head, his face expressing a look of uncharacteristic modesty at the comment - well, as modest as Eric Northman could ever get, anyway; but then again, for all the energy and spontaneity he naturally has to his personal character, he has always conducted himself with unconditional respect in Godric’s presence. 'I don't know if it suits me, really. But it's not bad to start off with,' he explains. 'I chose something simple for now, as that's what you chose and would choose. Something as humble as yourself.'

'You shouldn't let my personal tastes influence you,' frowns Godric as he walks over to idly inspect the empty bookshelf.

The blond shakes his head. 'Why not? I wanted to. It’s good. It's you.'

An answer typical of Eric, Godric thinks; he appreciates that his progeny’s feelings can be so complex, and yet the manner in which he expresses them can be so simple. It’s part of what has kept them so close together, keenly attached, in all these years. But even with the mild affection that spills through him at the blond’s expressed admiration, he knows it’d be wrong if he didn’t at least remind the other vampire to steer his own footsteps.

'What do you think is more you?'

Eric tilts his head slightly in thought as he turns his gaze out the window, his pale eyes indulgently earnest underneath the gentle wash of early evening moonlight. 'A bar,' he answers casually, his expression deceptively soft for what he's suggesting. 'A club.'

At this answer, Godric lets a small, demure smile spread across his features. 'A club?'

'Yeah, I’d like one. With a small stage for dancers, and the bar off to the side. And my office would be upstairs, maybe, or downstairs or just off to an adjacent room. I'd be able to hear the music and general revelry while I worked, or join in if I need to. It'd keep me from going insane if there's too much to do.'

It's an honest reply, and it's more Eric than anything else he can think of. The mental picture of dancing girls donned in feathery costumes, the heat of bright lights and the reverberation of a jazz piano melody suits him well; it’s the late 1920s, and Eric Northman’s lust for life and thrill had never weakened in all the years they’d lived side-by-side. 'Yes,’ Godric agrees encouragingly. ‘That's definitely more your style.'

The corners of Eric's mouth twitch in mild amusement, and he turns to look back at Godric with unmistakable respect in his gaze. 'You would actually approve of that?'

The dark-haired vampire raises an eyebrow. 'Why not? It's you.'

That echo isn't lost on them, and they both find mild entertainment and ease in the sentiment, but that’s that. They move together then – almost in perfect simultaneity – to the desk in the middle of the room, and turn to comfortably lean their lower backs against it. The length of their arms touch lightly as they rest beside each other there, and it crosses Godric’s thoughts not for the first time what a strangely inspiring combination they really are: the younger, tall, built progeny and the ancient, small, lean maker, still walking the earth together like they did almost a thousand years before, father, brother, son. He hasn’t heard of any other vampire pair who had knitted themselves to each other with the same unmitigated loyalty and love for as many centuries as they have. And the knowledge warms him.

'It's still strange,' Eric says suddenly, seeming uncertain. 'Thinking about how we're considered the same rank now.'

'I'm proud of you,' answers Godric reassuringly, even though he finds it strange, too; not because he thinks that Eric should rightfully be in a lower rank than himself, which he doesn’t care about, but because Eric has taken on a position of responsibility under an increasingly stiff Authority at all. Eric never hides his love and vigor for his personal life, and Godric knows he will take the role of sheriff with all seriousness, but he characteristically bends to no one but Godric himself. The years to follow will be worthy of note. 'It shows just how much you've grown.'

The blond shakes his head. 'You think too highly of me. I just wanted more variety in my life.'

'That's not a bad thing.'

'And I look up to you,' he says, locking his gaze firmly on Godric's; and it's so curious what they have with each other, Godric muses, because Eric is so much taller than him and has to physically look down upon him as he says this. 'I’ll never not look up to you. And I guess … it’s my own way of being closer to wherever you may be. So that it’s like we're still together every day, and you're not always obliged to be all the way in Dallas, this way.'

The words I missed you hang in the air between them, but the dark-haired vampire knows his progeny won’t say them – that degree of openly sentimental simplicity is not always in his personality. And it’s completely forgivable, because the message is still broadcasted in the softness of the expression on his face and in the creasing of his eyes and Godric is still touched by it. It’s comforting to not have Eric kneeling in veneration before him at this moment, to not have the differences between maker and progeny laid out so clearly between them. Right now, they’re equals to each other more than anything.

He can then feel Eric’s large hand closing over his on the table, warm and consoling, and Godric leans into the touch, brushing his thin knuckles against Eric’s palm. The silent contact is more reassuring than any words exchanged between them, and Godric finds himself hard-pressed at the idea of leaving for Dallas again when it’s time, at leaving this behind. But he’s not going to think about that right now; right now he’s going to indulge in this private intimacy, to spend deserved time with his dearly-loved child and support him in his promotion. Now that they’re bound to duty in two different cities, even the smallest amount of time spent with one another is altogether precious. He finds a tranquil relief at that moment to see Eric’s gaze seemingly mirroring his thoughts.

Pam appears in the doorway at this point, leaning sleekly against the frame, subtly tilting her head once in politeness upon seeing Godric. He is surprised to find that neither he nor Eric are compelled to shift themselves or their hands at her sudden presence, even though they know she isn’t focused on that anyway. ‘A drink of celebration?’ she drawls, raising a sensuously thin eyebrow, her red-painted lips quirking in one corner. ‘They brought in some fine willing boys for us. I’d say it’s especially called for now that there are three generations of brilliance here.’

‘Give us a minute,’ answers Eric, the start of a smirk spreading across his features. ‘We’ll be right there.’

‘Looking forward to it, Sheriff Northman,’ she teases mildly, before spinning around and disappearing again, the echoes of her high heels clacking down the hallway.

Godric turns his hand upwards and squeezes Eric’s fingers in amusement, looking up at him fondly. ‘You taught your child well.’

‘I learned from the best,’ the blond replies, returning the tender gesture. ‘Shall we go?’

They straighten themselves up, and their palms are released from their contact with one another, but the phantom of their touch still lingers there. A swirl of cold air envelops Godric’s fingertips, but he isn’t deterred by it. Eric’s presence, his barely-there smile, his warm gaze, still fills him with peace.

The two of them share one last demure look and move off, content. After all, the night is young.

Fanfic: Beyond All Telling (Godric & Eric)

2011-11-14T00:34:21Z

My other Godric/Eric fics: In Understanding | Sanctuary | What You Love Most | Generations Of Brilliance

Second-to-last fic request completed! Sorry this took so long to get done; skipped a week of writing due to Brisnova. It's a longer oneshot than usual to make up for it though!

This is for pjvilar from the Godric/Eric community, who gave me the prompt 'fast' :)

Title: Beyond All Telling
Author: Harmony (Silver Harmony)
Characters/Pairing: Godric & Eric
Rating: PG
Word Count: Approximately 2,817.
Disclaimer: Not mine, sadly.
Notes: Takes place in episode 2x09, after Nan Flanagan fires Godric and tells him to fill out forms (and Eric gets punched by Bill!). I felt compelled to write a much longer 'last moment' for Godric & Eric than what was given to us in the show, something that gives a little more closure on their relationship. As a pair, they deserve it. ♥
Feedback: Very much appreciated, as I need it to improve. Thank you!
Summary: Even when all their time together is too short, he had already been stifled with the exhaustion and gravity of the neverending days.

***

It’s hard to feel anything but heaviness, with Isabel hovering too closely at his side in hesitant concern and Nan Flanagan eyeing him intensely enough to drill holes into his skull – but then again, he's sitting there in her suite with little welcome; and even though this is more his dwelling-place than hers, he still feels the uncomfortable weight of being looked at as an outsider. The room feels somewhat chilly even for him, and smells like crisp, expensive perfume, almost a mark of Flanagan’s detachment, the perfectly cold picture of logic and politics and judgment behind keen narrowed eyes.

‘Are you done?’ she asks impatiently.

He turns his eyes to her briefly, taking in the distaste in her voice and her features. ‘Almost.’

Isabel’s eyes gleam with indignation at the displayed impatience for a moment, and Godric is more than grateful that she chooses to rein herself in instead of saying anything. Flanagan is an old vampire, but not compared to him – she still has the energy and dark vivacity that he knows he no longer cares for within himself; she spends every waking moment of her life building her impassioned beliefs into priority and progress, whereas he had not achieved the one thing he’d set out to do that he’d perceived to be right. For that, she is effectively blameless. She’s not yet old enough to fully understand patience, but either way, he doesn’t want to keep her waiting – nor himself.

He signs his name at the bottom of the form, and his very last duty is finished then, an arrival at the end of a time that he’s not sure how he feels about. He has both peaceful and less-than-wholesome memories of this time as sheriff – of the two thousand years of his long life in general – and he puts the pen down and knows that this is the conclusion.

‘I’m done.’

Godric doesn’t wait for the responses of either of the women, and gets up and makes his way to the door. He can sense Eric waiting outside the room, a wash of foreign desperation and anger and grief; he almost stops at the sensation of that unbearable sadness, filling every corner of his child’s heart, an overwhelming surge of pure urgency and hurt beyond anything he's ever felt from him. But he doesn’t stop, because the pain he feels isn’t his own, and regardless his progeny already bears enough for the both of them – enough to cover a shared millennium of devotion and darkness and love. Godric knows he can’t allow himself the luxury of the hurt.

He exits the suite and closes the door behind him, and sure enough, Eric is waiting for him down the hallway. Godric notices that the other vampire’s expression is deceptively impassive; he walks over to him slowly, mildly raising his eyebrows when he is close enough to perceive the thin slice across the blond’s lower lip.

‘What happened?’ he asks, extending his hand and running the tip of his thumb gently over the cut.

Eric reaches up and takes that hand within the cradle of his own large palm, larger fingertips lightly brushing against the small knuckles. ‘Nothing important,’ he answers, shaking his head. ‘A small disagreement with Bill Compton. It’ll heal over in a bit.’

Godric allows himself a barely-there smile. He's surprised he's still able to smile at all, after everything. ‘You don’t change.’

‘I wouldn’t. I’m still everything to you the way I am, right?’ Eric replies in mock-playfulness, but his heart clearly isn’t in it. Looking at him, it’s almost as if it’s taking all of his usual vitality and liveliness to keep something from falling to pieces.

Godric looks him in the eye, wanting to provide him comfort, and knowing that he can’t. But he answers with the truth as he feels it: ‘Always.’

His gaze falls away, then, to the window at the end of the corridor, where he can see the sky still shrouded in darkness. There are still a small handful of hours yet until the night’s end. A sudden tight grip on his hand abruptly breaks him from that train of thought, and he looks back at Eric in surprise; the urgency is more honestly gleaming from those eyes now, accompanied by something akin to a stirring fear that is unusual and alien for his angular features. A slight touch of sympathy reaches the dark-haired vampire then, knowing how vibrant his progeny’s lust for life still is, the way it had always been from the time they’d first met: he’s almost a mirror of what Godric himself had been a thousand years ago, a portrait of animalistic elegance and passion and eagerness, the embodiment of death and life walking on swift and graceful legs. Eric probably can’t understand, and maybe isn’t going to understand, and Godric regrets that it’s only going to hurt more.

He simply whispers: ‘Come.’

He slides his hand tenderly from the blond’s, beckons him to follow with a gentle tip of his head, and turns on his heel and starts making his way down the hallway.

Two thousand years he’s lived, and he knows full well how fast an hour or two goes by.

They settle together back in Godric’s suite, and Godric is unsure if the creeping finality that sweeps over him at that moment is a human feeling; after all, he doesn’t think like a vampire anymore, and that fleeting sentimentality wherein he feels he might miss his chambers, and this existence, is somehow a little beautiful and sadly unnecessary all at once. His private room is a contrast to the more extravagant rooms to which his guests have access, and he can’t be more grateful for his own choice in a more humble and simple way of living and the small bonus comfort of homeliness it has always brought him. He sets himself down on his plain loveseat and Eric stands across from him, a tremor in his lower lip.

‘Godric –’

‘I feel tired, Eric,’ Godric interrupts softly, and it’s nearly enlightening how heavy those words are with truth, how clearly they reflect all the days and nights he’s walked the earth, going on for years and years and never reaching any horizon, a crippling exhaustion in every muscle of the ancient body that had never grown older. ‘Come sit together with me.’

The blond hesitates for a moment, and Godric is no longer sure whether that muted, faint sliver of sadness is Eric’s or his own. He adds, under his breath: ‘Please.’

Eric moves to obey, but doesn’t sit next to him. He comes forward and falls on one knee before him; it’s the blond’s usual gesture for his respect, but this time it’s colored with anxiousness for proximity and closeness – his progeny wants to look him in the eye in every last waking moment from now on, he knows, to affirm his presence, to not let him out of his sight again if he can help it. If possible, he feels even more like a maker and father now than before, gazing back into those frightened eyes, seeing that faint quiver in his shoulders that’s almost hidden and just barely detectable, every bit the son seeking consolation from his father. Except he can only provide but a different comfort, now.

‘I beg you. Don’t,’ Eric only has to start, and Godric’s already shaking his head.

‘No, we’re not talking about this. Not now.’

The blond is driven to a pause, and Godric feels mildly sorry for the brief wounded look that flashes over the pale eyes, that expression of helpless frustration, but it’s not something he can change anymore.

‘How are you feeling?’ he asks, filling in the silence.

‘Fine,’ answers Eric with incredulity in his voice, ‘but that’s what I should be asking you, not the other way around.’

'I'm perfectly fine,' answers Godric demurely. 'Don't worry.'

The words hang thick in the air around them, unsaid but clearly understood by both: you don't need to worry about me anymore. To the dark-haired vampire's slight dismay, it only appears to set Eric even further on edge. The blond props himself up on both knees and presses forward, his built torso pushing lightly between Godric's knees and his arms coming to rest on either side of Godric's thighs as if needing to be close to him more than anything at that moment. Perhaps that's exactly what it is, and a part of Godric can't be more grateful.

'You know, Godric, I ... missed you,' utters Eric softly, almost inaudibly; the humble words sound strange on his usually sharp tongue, and there is something like a flush of discomfort across his ashen features at such an open sentiment, but the dark-haired vampire would forgive him ten times over even for that shame.

'And I also missed you,' answers Godric honestly, reaching out, fingers lightly threading through golden hair. 'Terribly. This is the first time we've seen each other in decades, isn't it? Last we parted, we were in Augsburg.'

'That was such a long time ago,' the blond utters in answer. 'Much too long.'

That's the funny thing about a vampire's innumerable years, muses Godric. The numbers of sunrises and sunsets seem to stretch out for so long, everlastingly, and the future and forever feels unbearably slow; but when all such seasons have passed they actually contradictively go by in a blink of an eye, and before one knows it, decades have already gone. The last time he has seen Eric is a very long time ago, indeed, but barely a fleeting moment in comparison to the thousands of years he'd lived and held patience with existence. It's saddening and simultaneously peculiar that even then, all those decades ago, even when all their time together is too short, he had already been stifled with the exhaustion and gravity of the neverending days.

'We had so many wonderful moments together though, hadn't we?'

He can't stop himself from using past tense already, and Eric notices this, judging by the way he suddenly digs his fingernails into the loveseat.

'Please don't,' the blond says, his voice hoarse as if caught in his throat.

The hand in Eric's hair moves to his shoulder, where it settles in a warm, reassuring grip. He knows the words were suffocating with finality, but it's his only chance left to share all of this with his progeny, to have this last moment with him. 'Sleeping together side-by-side, no matter where we were. Do you remember that?'

Eric closes his eyes tight, hurt etched into every line in his expression, and nods. It was a simple practice they had fallen into easily whenever they were far from home; nothing had brought them greater solace than lying silently beside each other in the dark, taking comfort in each other's wordless presence. It's a silly question – there's no way either of them could have forgotten that, but Godric doesn't regret asking.

'And visiting the shore,' he adds. 'You always accompany me to the shore when you believe I miss home. Even when I already had my home in you.'

The pale eyelids flutter open, and Eric gazes at him with shadows of emotions Godric can't quite discern; but he thinks the expression on his own face must be similar. Perhaps it's a fatal combination of the attempted pretense of aloofness with layers of neverending tiredness, sorrow and love beneath. To his own surprise, he allows himself another small, mild smile.

'Hunting together, and being inseparable those first few centuries. Living together, separating, finding each other, parting ways again, and finding each other again. You made every moment bearable. And even if I'm not with you, I'll still find you, like I always have.'

He doesn't know if it's a promise he can keep, depending on whether or not Eric keeps him alive in his heart, but a tiny, less-than-selfless part of him hopes for it. He wonders faintly how Eric will grieve, how fast he will stop grieving. He wonders if Eric will see him in his dreams, in misty visions, after this.

'Don't leave me, Godric,' the blond whispers. 'Please.'

Godric's eyebrows slant, and he takes Eric's face in both his hands and brushes his lips tenderly against his forehead. 'I'm here right now.'

Eric nods once, the most excruciating heartbreak never leaving his eyes, and lays his head down on Godric's lap in silence. He slides into sleep within minutes.

In just over an hour's time, when the approaching dawn is signalled by the faint brush of much colder air within the room, Godric manages to loosen himself from Eric's grip, where he had stayed in silent contentment. He plants a tender, lingering, heavyhearted kiss on the blond's cheekbone and leaves the security and shelter of his suite for the last time; he goes and bids farewell to Isabel, who doesn't quite understand why or where exactly he is going, but she has always implicitly trusted in him and doesn't press him with her questions, and he is thankful and thinks that's probably best. He also bids farewell to a few of his other subordinates, quelling their confusion with the simple explanation of his removal from office. And that's it. Soon enough, there's nothing more.

He takes slow steps to the rooftop, and the climb up the stairs is almost surreal.

When he reaches the open area, the air is unforgivingly wintry; it's somewhat appropriate in accompaniment with the pre-dawn mist, the cold pale light creeping over the horizon, the sky and the wind and the wide, wide expanse of space. He feels almost weighed down with shadows on the inside, and thinks that they would have fit in well with his surroundings if they had any tangible form. This thought, however, is dispelled by Eric's clear presence, looming behind him.

'Don't go through with this,' Eric hisses, and his voice is hard with anger and fear.

Godric raises his eyebrows. 'You're fast.'

The words are mercifully light-hearted in its tone. He fears that if it were anything but, his progeny would fall to pieces before him. But he recovers quickly from that luxury, knowing that sunrise is fast approaching.

'Would you forgive me?'

'No,' the blond says immediately, his eyes gleaming, filled with aching, saying without words: I'd miss you beyond all telling.

Forgiveness for everything is all Godric is searching for, and Eric's the one person who had forgiven him everything in the world and will still forgive him anything, and yet, he understands this one refusal completely.

'Even now, you're in here, more deeply embedded than anything else,' he says softly, brushing his hand against his own chest, filled suddenly with nostalgic memories of that night he'd first turned Eric, of sharing blood over years and years, being a part of him, becoming almost one with each other in that intimately-shared existence.

Eric's lip quivers, and he mirrors the gesture. He replies, under his breath: 'And so are you. Always.'

With those words alone, Godric feels a great weight lifting from him; for the first time that night, he feels the smallest sliver of self-peace.

He turns away from Eric to look at the horizon. It's not long now. He can hear light footfalls ascending the steps to the rooftop, and can see from the corner of his eye that it's the girl, Sookie Stackhouse. She's stopping at the top of the stairs, watching them and keeping silent out of respect, but he wouldn't have minded even if she had joined them at this point in time. He knows his child sees hope in her, and that rouses contented acceptance in him even more, knowing that there is someone to look out for Eric after he's gone.

He lowers his head, and carries no fear at all. He's about to burn, and is surprisingly no less than calm, and almost reconciled with himself. It's a strange, pleasant feeling.

'Two thousand years is enough.'

The sun rises and he feels the natural warmth and light of the world on his face for the first time in two long millennia; he stretches out his arms and thinks of Eric, keeps the memory of centuries of faith and love closer than ever, holds the image of his comfortingly familiar features and golden hair firmly in his mind and doesn't let go.

His mouth curves into the faintest smile, and Godric closes his eyes.

Fanfic: What You Love Most (Godric & Eric)

2011-10-31T11:38:55Z

My other Godric/Eric fics: In Understanding | Sanctuary | Beyond All Telling | Generations Of Brilliance

Finished the third out of five fic requests! This one is written for darkwolf218 from the Godric/Eric community, who requested bloodplay with an assertive Godric. However, there is no smut (yes, that is a warning).

Set the day after Godric turns Eric (the conversation from which the title is taken), whereupon they bond over a feed.

Title: What You Love Most
Author: Harmony (Silver Harmony)
Characters/Pairing: Godric & Eric
Rating: M
Word Count: Approximately 2,000.
Disclaimer: Not mine, sadly.
Notes: Spoilers for the scene wherein Eric was first turned.
Feedback: Very much appreciated, as I need it to improve. Thank you!
Summary: Godric & Eric bond over Eric's first feed.

***

No matter how Eric looks at it, something about it feels wrong and right, all at the same time.

He had never known of the existence of these nighttime beings – the being he himself had unexpectedly become, just the day before – until his maker had appeared to him with impish grace and a proffered hand, inviting him to walk together through darkness, a companion of Death. And he should have expected that the beast he has transformed into would feed and live on others; but he was dying, and the prospect of life had tempted and won him over, and he had thought of nothing more beyond the pure salvation offered to him. But seeing his maker now, grasping at the young village-girl, one hand clawed around her throat, is still entirely surreal if only for the knowledge that she serves as nothing but food for them. There is both hesitancy and want stirring, awakening in him at the sight – something that gives off the sense of both wrong and right.

Eric had been told just before the hunt that humans can be mesmerized, glamored into willingness; he had also been warned, much to his added unease, that such an enchantment will only teach ineffectual experience upon the first feed.

‘Drink,’ the boy with ancient eyes whispers, grinning at him toothily, long fingers clenched in a firm vice-grip around the crying girl’s thin shoulder.

Eric looks at him momentarily, shifting in uncertainty. But in a flash, that slender hand is around his wrist, so fast that he almost doesn’t see it coming, bone-crushingly tight and surprisingly warm and terrifying all at once.

‘Trust me, my child,’ he continues reassuringly in a frighteningly silky voice, and hearing it, Eric wants to give in to him, wants to back away, wants to lay himself down at his feet, wants to give him his death and life and everything in between. He was a Viking lord who had taken many women, and had breathed and lived seduction, and this is not seduction and beyond seduction all at the same time; it's a wash of organic impulses that make him imagine the quickening rhythm of his long-gone heartbeat, a shuddering, pulsing animal instinct. Indeed, he had become a child of Death.

‘Who are you?’ Eric whispers, and can’t decide whether to recoil or lean in when those dark eyes fix themselves on his, guiltlessly rapt and keenly aware, as if the Viking is all that suddenly exists on the earth.

Smirking, he answers: ‘Power from God.’

Godric. Eric faintly echoes the name once for familiarity, the syllables enthrallingly gentle on the tip of his tongue, and he marvels at how it’s not by any means pretentious, or conceitedly proclaimed; he is vaguely aware of something akin to an invisible thrumming in the air all around them, an imaginary enchantment exuding from the slender limbs and beastly grace before him, something that indeed feels like a shadow of God. This being, his maker – Godric – feels every bit like death and life in the shape of a mischievous boy, and nothing like his mind’s picture of the afterlife, the brilliantly vivid light and glory of Valhalla.

‘And … who are we?’ he voices hesitantly, under his breath.

An unexpected peal of bright laughter rips through the air in response, soft and fearsome, the devastating color of merriment and enigma and knowledge.

The girl between them seems to cry in even greater fright, her terrified eyes set on Godric’s sweet grin of mirth, and Eric wholly understands her terror without any attempt. Godric smiles at him, an unremitting gentleness in his gaze and in his features, his rough nails tearing so deeply into the girl’s skin in contradiction that they’re already wetly red-smeared. A quiver momentarily passes through Eric; he doesn’t know if it's born from delight.

‘Drink,’ Godric only says.

He doesn’t need to be told again. All the world’s hunger sets in, and he can feel his own teeth snapping violently into place, and he sinks them into pale flesh with lightning velocity and partakes of the drink he craves. It’s his first feed since he had been changed, he realizes, and he’s aware of Godric’s gaze transfixed on him in a look that feels breathtakingly close to gratification and pride. The hunger is similar and yet so different to what hunger used to be for him; the coppery heat slides down his throat and touches him with life and rebirth, satiates the most painful craving for existence the way food had never could. For the first time, the thought of having become this nighttime beast fills him with an unsaid thrill, and he drinks, and drinks, and is filled to the brim with life.

What’s in it for me? He remembers his own utterance, just before he had been changed.

And that velvety, reassuring voice, answering comfortingly: What you love most – life.

And he stops then, withdraws his fangs from the ashen skin; the girl has already gone perfectly still, her cries smothered, her gaze clouded over, and Eric can only stare at her in surprise. That staggering first hunger had been such that he had not even realized when there was little left to drink. The blood still trickles over his lips, over his chin, but he knows he has sucked her dry – not only a feed, but a kill; he is conscious of the fact that he is still being looked at with keen interest, and he wonders briefly then if there is anything left within himself that is still vaguely human in such a moment of finality. He sets her down on the ground and runs his fingertips down her face without a word, setting her eyelids to a close.

A strange expression crosses Godric’s face, something resembling curiosity, maybe, or perhaps a mild surprise.

‘You carry mercy,’ he says plainly.

Eric is unable to tell whether the words are laced with disappointment; a mild self-conscious anxiety touches him then. ‘She looked as young as you may have been,’ he answers slowly as he straightens up, uncertain. He hasn’t slaughtered outside of the battlefield except when he must, and a part of him starts to question if Godric can suddenly glimpse it now, if he perceives it to be an unnecessary weakness.

To his surprise, Godric’s lips curve into a smile.

‘How interesting.’

Eric wonders then if Godric no longer remembers what mercy feels like in all the hidden years he’s walked the earth. But this may also be his own last act of humanity, for all he knows.

Godric comes forward to him then; it’s such a surreal moment, with him almost pawing the ground with his feet in primal elegance – the Viking stops in his tracks, seeing this image and almost being reminded of a scavenger, skulking in wait – and all train of thought stops completely when a slender fingertip is raised to his chin, lightly smearing the foreign blood that is still dripping there, slowly tracing it down his throat in a sensuous line.

Eric swallows, speechless, his eyes wide.

‘But you have never felt more alive, have you?’

He closes his eyes, and can feel the faint quiver in his own lower lip. This must be a test, a small voice murmurs in his mind; because he knows Godric is drawing in and leaning in so close, too close, and Eric can suddenly feel the moist warmth of a delicate tongue trailing the line of blood back up his throat, and it’s almost as if something in him falls to ruin and is reborn – a sensation close to hairs standing on the back of his neck, or a shiver in his spine. He has never felt such devoted fear, and he has never wanted to fall upon his knees in impassioned reverence this much.

‘Open your eyes, my child,’ a whisper against his jawline, an unexpected flutter of eyelashes against his chin, a soft thumb wiping the last traces of blood away from his parted lips. ‘There is much more that I’ll give you.’

Eric obeys. The heightened intimacy is unique, like nothing else he has ever known; it’s more than any child’s loving embrace with his mother, more than any man’s unconditional care and loyalty for his brother, more than any kind of fulfilling warmth found within sex and a partner's skin. And Godric is standing before him, so close that their bodies almost touch, bringing his hand up to run his fingertips across Eric’s cheek, pausing right where the supple base of his palm brushes against the corner of Eric’s mouth. Godric’s scent fills every corner of his being, his consciousness, a smell of an imagined heat and blood and ardor. Without asking, an unfathomable impulse takes over him completely and he lifts that small hand from his face slightly and sinks his fangs into the slim wrist.

And in that instant he feels as though he can live a thousand lifetimes, with his maker’s warm blood trickling down his tongue, making him all too aware of a hidden starvation he hadn’t known existed, washing the taste of the girl away.

‘Yes,’ hisses Godric, his voice broken and heated with what sounds dangerously like thrill, and if Eric’s heart was still beating, it would have started racing upon hearing the fervor and indulgence in the whisper.

He is intoxicated on the warm fluid filling him, but he lifts his mouth momentarily from the pallid skin, flowing red dripping from his teeth and lips anew and creeping down Godric’s lean forearm; before even realizing that the word has slid out of his mouth, he eagerly mutters, ‘Take.’

And Godric does. Soon enough, Eric feels fingers curling tightly around his elbow and the light brush of fangs against his collarbone, fluttering slowly, gradually upwards to the base of his neck, and a lightning-fast sharp pain and gratification following straight after. He is already familiar with the immediate sting from yesterday’s transformation and yet this is still unexpectedly new, the sensation of his core being slowly drained, being shared with the very entity who made him, feeling much like utterly putting his life in his hands. It's almost a dizzying completion, to have Godric be a part of him, to have himself be a part of Godric, giving and taking, becoming almost like one being. In answer, Eric brings forward the hand that is still cradled within his and softly, reverently traces his mouth up the line of blood trickling down Godric’s arm, letting the droplets collect in the small gap between his parted lips, savoring each sliver of this connection as if it’s the last thing he lives for.

Who are we?

Godric isn’t drawing much from him – only a graciously small amount, enough to hurt delightfully, enough for it to be a luxury; yet the lips moving lightly against the base of Eric's neck and the gentle, moist tongue gathering the faint crimson drops from his skin in tiny circles are enough to feel alike to a strange and consoling embrace. The fangs slowly withdrawing from his flesh is almost like a mourned loss, and he feels a mild disappointment, too, when he notices how quickly the graceful wrist against his mouth has also healed over.

‘We’re Godric,’ a surprisingly modest utterance of solace against the hollow of his throat, ‘and Eric, and we share with one another, walk with one another, and are alive.’

The Viking doesn’t know if it serves as a simple proclamation or as the answer to his earlier question, but veneration and passion surges through him at the words regardless; it’s nothing less than aching and flawless, a verbalization of a newfound intimacy, a consciousness of their suddenly-shared existence, something that he understands completely now without having to ask. The small body finally withdraws from him entirely, and the coldness of the night washes over him, and Eric can’t miss him more.

Godric turns around, but looks back at him and mildly grins.

‘Come.’

He starts moving off with his usual primal grace, without the lightning speed, and Eric feels the corners of his own mouth curve upwards and he makes to follow; he knows that he will always, always follow.

It’s long until the night is over, and eternity, too, lies in wait for them both.

Fanfic: Sanctuary (Godric & Eric)

2011-10-24T05:55:45Z

My other Godric/Eric fics: In Understanding | What You Love Most | Beyond All Telling | Generations Of Brilliance

Second fic request out of five done. This one is written for laorion from the Godric/Eric community, who requested homesick!Godric. Unfortunately I had to tweak this prompt a little bit to fit Godric's canon characterization more, but I hope it still works nonetheless. :)

Set just after their Operation Werewolf stint in 1945, assumingly just before their decades-long separation. The brief summary of Godric's early history in Rome as well as the possibility of his life on the coast (mentioned in passing in this fic) is found on the TB Wiki, here. Also, the ending is deliberate. XD

Title: Sanctuary
Author: Harmony (Silver Harmony)
Characters/Pairing: Godric & Eric
Rating: PG
Word Count: Approximately 1,580.
Disclaimer: Not mine, sadly.
Notes: A little moment between our two favorite vamps. Spoilers for the Operation Werewolf flashback involving Godric & Eric in Germany.
Feedback: Very much appreciated, as I need it to improve. Thank you!
Summary: 'Would you go back to that life if you could?'

***

It is never a quiet night in Augsburg. There is always a heated flurry of sounds in the air, of blaring sirens and buzzing engines and urgent voices, like a scratched record playing again and again – the neverending music of the human condition in 1945.

And Godric’s uniform doesn’t fit him well. It hangs loose in places, covers him up totally in a manner Eric thinks is too stuffy, falls just a little too big for his small, slender form. Perhaps it is this whole place and their own circumstances that generally exude every sensation of foreignness; they’d lived around a thousand years together, set foot in many a war-torn land, outlived every generation like it had been a passing moment. Yet in the millennium that they had walked the earth side-by-side, familiarity never seems to get that much easier, even when the blond doesn’t care much for the occurrences in the world around him – soon, it will be bygones, much like everything else. And, in the seemingly endless passage of time, he has only Godric to anchor him.

The military coat looks good on his maker, but that doesn’t mean Eric likes the look. The disguise always makes him think back in contrast to when they had first met, when the dark-haired vampire, feral and childlike, had appeared to him in nothing but torn rags: his first glimpse of Death in the form of a young boy. And it had been nothing less than natural, organic – there was something consoling about it that had brought every sensation of being home.

‘Eric,’ Godric’s voice breaks him out of his fleeting reverie. ‘What is it?’

Eric realizes he has been staring; a faint moment of self-consciousness passes through him, and he shakes his head. ‘It's nothing.’

‘Then come.’

Their sleeping ritual has been the same for all the years they spent their mornings together – lying quietly side-by-side, Godric on the left, Eric on the right, exchanging small words until they fall to eventual slumber. Eric can feel the biting coldness of the creeping dawn wash over him in that small, filthy wooden shack. He walks over and lays himself down by Godric in the dark, grimy alcove in the corner; it reeks faintly of stale blood and gunpowder under that crooked roof, and the uncovered earth feels uncomfortably hard and bumpy against his back, but the space is strangely welcoming in his slight fatigue. It’s tight enough that his shoulder touches Godric’s lightly when they spread their bodies out in the shadows there, in that secure, hidden, unsuspecting dip in the wall.

Even under the cover of complete darkness, Eric can see the other vampire lying on his back, his eyes fixed on the ceiling. The heavyweight wool of the military coat is spread out over him, almost impossibly large over the small, prone body; a part of the blond is oddly relieved to see it not donned upon his maker’s shoulders. It doesn’t suit the gaze in those dark eyes, he muses. There is something about this, all of this, that bears an inexplicable sadness that has nothing to do with the human war.

‘Thank you for your patience with me,’ he suddenly finds himself blurting out. The memory of his own impetuousness during their personal mission of squeezing information from the foul wolf girl earlier that week, and Godric’s lightning-fast reflex in saving him when she had struck him to the ground, still brought him an uncharacteristic feeling of the mildest shame.

Godric doesn’t look at him. ‘I’m only doing what I can.’

Eric wonders when it was in the last number of centuries, exactly, when the playful grin of Death had turned into this gaze – an endless exhaustion, a mark of something akin to surrender, the cloudiness of years and years and years of secret aging, and such ancient eyes set into an impossibly young face. It contrasts so starkly from Eric’s unapologetic lust for life, still constant and steady; even after around a thousand years, his unashamed grasp is still strong on the stimulating eternal life that the other vampire had gifted to him so many ages ago. He wonders if that spark from years long past, the tiniest tongue of flame, exists at all behind his maker’s own eyes now.

‘You always do so much for me.’

The corners of Godric’s mouth curve slightly, almost unnoticeably. ‘I’d do whatever I can for you, my child,’ he utters softly, and Eric doesn’t have to stretch to hear the humble sincerity behind the words. ‘Within reason.’

Eric almost wants to say, is there anything I can do for you? but he knows how laughable that is. He knows his own selfishness, his own unrelenting spontaneity and self-indulgence. There is nothing he can trust himself to promise Godric – and keep said promise – with absolute certainty, even in his most unmitigated reverence.

There are faraway echoes of another wailing siren, of maybe distant gunfire. He muses that it always feels almost like taking a surreal step into a different world, all over again.

‘Do you miss home?’ he says, out of the blue; it’s only after the words slide from his lips that he realizes he isn't exactly sure what had inspired him to say them.

And Godric replies: ‘What do you say home is, Eric?’

He knows that Godric doesn’t mean it in that way, but the response still stirs the slightest touch of guilt in him. For vampires as old as they are, there’s not really a definition for home any longer: the earth shifts, lives and kinship slip away, language and music and belief change with every passing dawn. Before they’d known it, they’d grown to follow the current of time without questioning it, because there’s nothing else they can do.

‘It’d be Gaul for you, I guess,’ Eric answers, consciously not mentioning Rome. He knows Godric had left behind his own human suffering and history there. There is no lingering anguish – after all, that slice of time is too far gone – but there is simultaneously never any need to bring it into conversation.

The dark-haired vampire actually smiles now, but it is his usual smile from these days: one that is touched by every color of sadness. ‘The nostalgia does reach out to me sometimes.’

Eric knows that look; he sees it etched into Godric’s face whenever they pass the coast – a strange stirring warmth of familiarity, even though it is a different coastline almost every time. He has often wondered what the lands and villages were like a thousand years before he himself was born, when Godric had first been birthed into existence. He also wonders exactly how much of the world had changed for his maker in those centuries, if there had been as much change as in the last millenium, such that anything that was vaguely home had already turned unrecognizable when they’d first met. He can almost imagine the ancient rolling water and the soft stretch of sand and stone reflected in reminiscence in those large, dark eyes.

‘But it is a distant memory,’ Godric continues, after a pause. ‘One that I barely remember at all. One that I’ve outgrown.’

Although not completely, Eric adds as an afterthought. He doesn’t want it to cross his mind, but he is vaguely aware that it may be one of the only things keeping the other vampire from choosing to slip away from the world, from everything.

‘Would you go back to that life if you could?’ he asks, shifting slightly underneath the enveloping blanket of his own coat. ‘To your people?’

‘And where would your place be in my existence then?’ answers the dark-haired vampire almost immediately, turning at last to meet his eyes, and Eric is almost surprised at how fast the response had come. And, all at once, an immense surge of ardor and passion washes over him, and he can’t thank fate for his life more. He knows that nothing else – no one else – can bring him a greater sanctuary.

He feels a gentle hand creep under the heavy folds of his coat, and Godric’s cold knuckles brushing lightly against his; it’s barely a touch at all, but at the same time, it feels like everything – and more. It’s a wordless solace, a tender serenity that feels reminiscent of what it must be like to be home. Eric reaches out slightly and returns the mild gesture. The words I can’t live without you either are poised at the tip of the blond’s tongue, but they’re too sentimental and outwardly syrupy for his self-defined character, so he doesn’t say them; but he knows from the way the corners of Godric’s eyes softly crease at that moment that the unsaid statement has been heard, regardless.

On this foreign soil, in this small, grubby shack, in the midst of the hollow human crusades of 1945, they still find home in the same place it had always been every day that they’d spent together, and Eric takes comfort in the fact that even the tiniest slivers of anything that can resemble homesickness are always wiped clean in the solid black of the shadows where they find refuge in each other.

They remain silent for the rest of the morning, curled securely next to one another; Eric falls to slumber dreaming of walking the earth with Godric like this for another thousand years, a companion of Death, and he has faith – he just knows, somehow – that surely, that must be how things will come to pass.