Rest in Peace, Squeaky

Squeaky passed from this life today at around 12:30pm. He was three months old.

When we woke up this morning, things were fine. He greeted us with his usual head-nudges and chin licks. Shortly after breakfast, I noticed that he was breathing heavily in Jason's lap. I picked him up, kissed him, and realized he was a little bit warmer than usual. Despite having a vet appt. tomorrow, we decided that breathing and possible fever were enough to warrant taking him to the animal hospital, even though he didn't seem in distress. He happily cuddled up to his sister and fell asleep, as usual.

We were at the hospital at 12:18. I took him out of his carrier, but as soon as I handed him to the vet tech, he went ballistic. Highly, highly unlikely for him. At 12:25, the doctor called us in. Jason hadn't even finished the paperwork yet. Squeaky's heart stopped the moment the vet picked him up, and they were unable to revive him. Both intubation and CPR failed to re-start his heart.

She said that there's nothing we could have done differently. That we did exactly what we should have done. She said that because he was feral, he might have been deeply inbred, and if this wasn't something very acute, it was very likely a genetic defect, perhaps his heart. They checked Olive. She's healthy as an ox. An autopsy is scheduled for Squeaky tomorrow, and we will be receiving his ashes.

To say we're devastated is a bit of an understatement. Jason and I haven't stopped crying. I very nearly had a full breakdown in the examining room. It was so -fast-. We never thought that it could be something so serious. We thought that maybe it was related to his cold, which he's been on amoxycillin for. We never thought that we'd never see him alive again, never get to hold or kiss him again. We sat with him, wrapped in a blanket, for a short while and told him how much we loved him. I'm sure he knew. He was a very happy kitty-- always purring and licking us and climbing over us.

Olive knows something's up. She's being extra lovey. We know that we're going to have to get her a companion kitty in a few months, but right now, we're understandably heartsick.

Our little bunny butt, who hopped instead of ran. Our squirt with the big pumpkin belly. His inquisitive looks. The way he'd always explore first. He was so lovey. He adopted us just the same as we'd adopted him. And now our family of four is now three.

I am sad beyond words.