Christina's Guide to Mingling in a Bar
Tip one: Accept all shots from those cute guys the next table over graciously with a smile, and always say thank you. However, suggest that the Jagermeister also be mixed with something else before it lights your po' ass up.
Tip two: Maintain eye contact with someone who will help you throw down should one of the group now congregated around you reach out to touch the hiney.
Tip three: Always have a fake number memorized.
If you follow these rules, your chances for drinking free of charge all night long until you're good and smoked rises exponentially.
However, the chances of you telling the muscly impromptu cowbell player that you laughed so hard you could marry him also rises exponentially. I have also discovered that the median age of people who hit on me is 29.
I'm just glad that I made it home okay, and passed out on my parents' couch fully clothed, reeking of secondhand smoke, and acting Gayer Than Ever. Add that to the three glasses of wine that I imbibed tonight over dinner, and I'm in need of some serious liver detox.
We here at Christina's Livejournal consider this a Draw.
Tip two: Maintain eye contact with someone who will help you throw down should one of the group now congregated around you reach out to touch the hiney.
Tip three: Always have a fake number memorized.
If you follow these rules, your chances for drinking free of charge all night long until you're good and smoked rises exponentially.
However, the chances of you telling the muscly impromptu cowbell player that you laughed so hard you could marry him also rises exponentially. I have also discovered that the median age of people who hit on me is 29.
I'm just glad that I made it home okay, and passed out on my parents' couch fully clothed, reeking of secondhand smoke, and acting Gayer Than Ever. Add that to the three glasses of wine that I imbibed tonight over dinner, and I'm in need of some serious liver detox.
We here at Christina's Livejournal consider this a Draw.