Blessed Midsummer, everyone. I need to find myself a wide, open field this weekend.
Today was... well, it was okay. For starters, my toilet-dunked cell phone is not dead as feared. I dried it overnight, and then hit it with a hair dryer for about 15 minutes. The LCD screen flickered a few times, then sprang miraculously to life. It's been working fine all afternoon. My plan is to see how it goes for the time being, and if I have any problems, I'll take it in to the shop because I have insurance on it.
For the curious, it fell in the toilet because it was in the back pocket of my jeans. As I was preparing to use the restroom, I tugged my jeans down, and the phone flipped out and into the bowl. I figured out what happened and fished it out in less than five seconds. Yes, the toilet was empty. Yes, I disinfected that sucker anyhow.
Still, I am the SMRTest girl you are ever likely to know.
Today was my little brother's birthday. Fourteen. He's going into high school, and it's beyond strange. Little Daniel, he who was once obsessed beyond all reason with Thomas the Tank Engine now has spiky bleached blond tips in his hair. He's almost as tall as me. It's bizarre beyond the telling of it.
My father picked me up, and we went to dinner, then to the mall. My dad gave me $100 as a late graduation present, but I always feel... odd taking money from him. I don't know how to explain it, exactly. Part of me is angry that he never even tried to help with anything during college. The other part of me pities him because Marriane took him for all he's worth when she left, and he's a very poor man. I felt guilty taking the money, but he forced it into my hand, and so I spent it on my siblings because I didn't know what else to do with it. I bought Daniel his gift-- a fancy Star Wars Lego kit (some things never change), and I bought Melissa two dressy skirt sets because she's going through that eleven year-old, awkward pre-adolescent shift and has no nice clothes to wear. Cerulean blues and rosy pinks-- her eyes lit up as we walked through the store, filling our arms with clothes to try on.
"Mommy would never let me try this on!" She said this of a loose, airy, ankle-grazing skirt. I managed not to say that that's because her mommy is a ho. It's true that Melissa is a little overweight-- right now, she's all belly and skinny legs. I think that eating was a coping thing when Marianne and my dad split. But Marianne doesn't understand that trying to force her into skimpier clothing is not the way to help her lose the weight, and that healthier eating and puberty will even things out just fine. Seeing the kid in the store, looking at flowy, pretty clothing was like seeing another kid altogether. She just seemed so excited that someone was paying attention to her, and asking her what she likes. I was like her fairy godmother or something.
And I have always felt massive amounts of guilt that I've never been a large part of her life-- I was only around half the time she was young, and by the time she actually became an individual, I was away at college. I look at her female role models and cringe-- she's got my Aunt Linda, and that's good, but very little else. I'd fucking die if she turned out like her mother. Melissa adores me-- she idolizes me because I'm her big sister-- and I don't want to be the big sister who doesn't have the time, and who eases her guilt by buying pretty things. I know that realistically, even if I had a car and could pick her up on the weekends or something, it wouldn't be that easy because of the custody situation. So. It's complicated.
Also, I have a new second cousin. Grace Allen was born today to my cousin Chuckie and his wife, Amy, weighing over 8 lbs, after 10 hours of induced labor. Welcome to the world, kiddo. Let's hope you've got more of your daddy in you than your momma.
Today was... well, it was okay. For starters, my toilet-dunked cell phone is not dead as feared. I dried it overnight, and then hit it with a hair dryer for about 15 minutes. The LCD screen flickered a few times, then sprang miraculously to life. It's been working fine all afternoon. My plan is to see how it goes for the time being, and if I have any problems, I'll take it in to the shop because I have insurance on it.
For the curious, it fell in the toilet because it was in the back pocket of my jeans. As I was preparing to use the restroom, I tugged my jeans down, and the phone flipped out and into the bowl. I figured out what happened and fished it out in less than five seconds. Yes, the toilet was empty. Yes, I disinfected that sucker anyhow.
Still, I am the SMRTest girl you are ever likely to know.
Today was my little brother's birthday. Fourteen. He's going into high school, and it's beyond strange. Little Daniel, he who was once obsessed beyond all reason with Thomas the Tank Engine now has spiky bleached blond tips in his hair. He's almost as tall as me. It's bizarre beyond the telling of it.
My father picked me up, and we went to dinner, then to the mall. My dad gave me $100 as a late graduation present, but I always feel... odd taking money from him. I don't know how to explain it, exactly. Part of me is angry that he never even tried to help with anything during college. The other part of me pities him because Marriane took him for all he's worth when she left, and he's a very poor man. I felt guilty taking the money, but he forced it into my hand, and so I spent it on my siblings because I didn't know what else to do with it. I bought Daniel his gift-- a fancy Star Wars Lego kit (some things never change), and I bought Melissa two dressy skirt sets because she's going through that eleven year-old, awkward pre-adolescent shift and has no nice clothes to wear. Cerulean blues and rosy pinks-- her eyes lit up as we walked through the store, filling our arms with clothes to try on.
"Mommy would never let me try this on!" She said this of a loose, airy, ankle-grazing skirt. I managed not to say that that's because her mommy is a ho. It's true that Melissa is a little overweight-- right now, she's all belly and skinny legs. I think that eating was a coping thing when Marianne and my dad split. But Marianne doesn't understand that trying to force her into skimpier clothing is not the way to help her lose the weight, and that healthier eating and puberty will even things out just fine. Seeing the kid in the store, looking at flowy, pretty clothing was like seeing another kid altogether. She just seemed so excited that someone was paying attention to her, and asking her what she likes. I was like her fairy godmother or something.
And I have always felt massive amounts of guilt that I've never been a large part of her life-- I was only around half the time she was young, and by the time she actually became an individual, I was away at college. I look at her female role models and cringe-- she's got my Aunt Linda, and that's good, but very little else. I'd fucking die if she turned out like her mother. Melissa adores me-- she idolizes me because I'm her big sister-- and I don't want to be the big sister who doesn't have the time, and who eases her guilt by buying pretty things. I know that realistically, even if I had a car and could pick her up on the weekends or something, it wouldn't be that easy because of the custody situation. So. It's complicated.
Also, I have a new second cousin. Grace Allen was born today to my cousin Chuckie and his wife, Amy, weighing over 8 lbs, after 10 hours of induced labor. Welcome to the world, kiddo. Let's hope you've got more of your daddy in you than your momma.