-- Look for a new BOS. Nothing fancy, but I am partial to hardback, large durable styles. My auxilliary herb journal can be leather, and I have several of those. Went through my old BOS, which is about 175 pages long. Meditative exercise is right. Time to invest in new black pens. UniBall free-flowing ink ones are the best.

-- Spend some time making earrings. I am not stressing about this update, and I have had more than my fair share of stress lately. I need to be creative today.

-- Cry when I need to, and not feel bad about it. The words "you couldn't do anything" are finally sinking in, so I think I'm moving past denial.

-- Get some hair dye. I have an inch-thick tiger stripe down the center of my skull. I don't think I've touched my roots up in two months. Hell, I haven't worn makeup or done my hair in almost two weeks.

-- Send this week's orders.

-- Love up on my furchild. Since the loss of her brother, she's becoming a full-on lap kitten.

-- Catch up on True Blood. 'Cause I have INTERNET NOW.

We went to pick up Squeaky's ashes this evening. It was hard. I cried a lot. I had a hard time even holding the box. We have a fully packed weekend, so we will likely do a Squeaky memorial early next week. Most of his ashes will be scattered in the nearby woods. A bit will be saved for a potted plant that will sit on our back stoop, so he can go with us wherever we go.

We're going to frame a picture of him and keep it by the door, so we see it every day. We're also going to buy a box and fill it with pictures, memories, and his favorite catnip mouse.

Thank you Anna and Brooke, your condolence cards were very appreciated. Thank you, Abby, for the donation in his name.

And now to finish the last parts of the update, dye my roots, and then get properly drunk on girly coconut rum.