Today has been a complete and utter waste. The one thing that I thought was going to be a bright spot fell though like moldy flan. So much for that.

I'm convinced tomorrow is going to be shit. Part of it is that I'm now super-paranoid that my boss has been monitoring my email again, which means that friends-only super-frustrated job explosion I had on Friday would be out there in the ether. I should have been more careful. Regardless, I've softened the language now that I've calmed down (and the money has made its way into my bank account). I'm just really irritated that I'm getting my job done and getting us completely caught up on my part of the billing, and yet it's like I'm under a microscope, and the female boss is as snippy as ever. She's really hard to work with sometimes, because she just makes you feel like an ant. I'm not someone who's easily intimidated, and she doesn't intimidate me, per-se, but she does have a tendency to make me feel like I've done something horribly wrong, even when I haven't. So now that I have done something "wrong" (i.e.-- ranted on company time), I'm extra-paranoid.

I'm just going to have to be more careful. That, and I should start looking for back-up jobs for when I reach absolute breaking point. I don't mind being held accountable for my duties. What I do mind is catching attitude for things that are far beyond my control, much less things that were not my fault. Even things like, "we're just going to have to do a better job," when said to me about things I had absolutely nothing to do with come across as condescending and wrong.

Anyway, I hope this uneasiness is just paranoia. Nerves. Whatever. I hope.