Virgo:: he paradoxes are coming! The paradoxes are coming! It won't be enough merely to solve a few amusing brainteasers. You'll have to find a way to feel perfectly fine as you get squeezed by industrial-strength contradictions that might make a less intelligent person feel crazy. Can you do it? Is it possible for you to remain poised and magnanimous in the face of the pressure to think impossible thoughts and feel indescribable feelings? Can you see how all three sides of every story are equally valid? The potential rewards are substantial: a crispy epiphany, a funky treasure, and the equivalent of a "Get Out of Jail Free" card.

I don't really know what to say about last week's horoscope. I don't know what to say about a lot of things today. I feel completely hazy, unfocused.

In short-- I've finished The Secret History, and I am close to being finished with Bibliomancy. I will likely post reviews of both by Friday.

If you are participating in the Atmospheric CD swap, remember to drop your CDs in the mail this week! All mine are completed, I just have to go to the post office.

Jacques is up and down. He's eating and drinking, but also not very active and very sensitive to touch. He squeaks every time I pick him up-- he seems very disoriented to me. I'm keeping his tank very clean and picking up a refill of his meds tonight. I guess at this point, my goal is to keep him as comfortable as possible, so if he goes, he won't be gasping for breath.

My kidneys are acting up again. To avoid another trip to the hospital, I've begun a regimen of cranberry pills, garlic supplement, uva ursi capsules, and water water water. It's 13 pills every 4 hours. I can't stand taking pills-- they always feel like they get stuck in my throat. I'd love to trade this body in for one that works. Other than that, I just feel very down. I've not been terribly happy as of late. I think I'm just worn down.

I've been following the news, and the Abdul Rahman case has been getting under my skin. In America, where all Muslims seemingly fall under the blanket term of 'extremist,' this case is being used to point out "See? see? They are all terrorists!" And it's complicated, because discussions are becoming muddier and muddier. On one hand, it's nearly impossible, I think, to separate a religion from its negative stereotypes when it has been so perverted by politics. Look no further than America's own hypocritical brand of Christianity to see that this is true. But I have never, ever been able to understand why one human being should have any say so whatsoever over what another person believes, let alone using faith as a valid reason to call for his or her killing. It's become a cult of death, not a tradition that values life. I'm angry, I'm appalled, and mostly, I'm at a loss for words.

I need to watch some old-school Buffy. It'd be nice to fool myself, even temporarily, that there are monsters that can be named and slain, and that everything will be allright when the sun rises.