And then, you rember, this other time...

shodan — Tue, 24 Oct 2006 06:08:11 GMT

TWO ITEMS:

1. the fray sucks my goat-ahole..............i mean they suck so bad it hurts me to acknowledge their existence. if you like anything about the fray, commit suicide...... immediately!!

2. i'm ordering this within 24 hours............http://store.apple.com/1-800-MY-APPLE/WebObjects/AppleStore.woa/wo/0.RSLID?mco=4F8E07C4&nclm=MacPro

oh jeez.....she's so pretty....i don't want to jinx what i'm doing right now but look for me on the travel channel in early february. i don't mean just my work. i mean me

THAT IS ALL
E

awwwwwwwwwwww shiiiiit

shodan — Thu, 12 Oct 2006 06:05:37 GMT

well, i was offline for a year, and i loved it. but fuck if i didn't need about 5.5 seconds on this internet (i think this thing is going to stick around) before i was back on this shit....damn ya'll, damn....

HOLLA BACK BITCHES!!!!

(holla holla holla....)

not yet dead

shodan — Sun, 19 Feb 2006 23:23:39 GMT

but I did go to jail for 20 hours on Feb. 15.

discuss

no i'm not in serious trouble
no i did not get raped
yes i slept on the floor with pablo escobar next to a toilet...a really, really clean toilet....

i have lots of new friends

more to come kids...........................

fuck me

Weekend Update with Captain Sassy-poo

shodan — Fri, 16 Sep 2005 15:57:36 GMT

I'm moving on Sunday morning. Anyone who hates themselves is welcome to come help me.

I'll be without internet for at least a couple of weeks starting tommorrow. That's gonna hurt more than I care to admit.

Depeche Mode is coming to Atlanta and tickets go on sale a week from tommorrow. Sunshine on a grey day.

Laters.

shodan — Mon, 15 Aug 2005 17:21:59 GMT

Mars V and SOAD is on...like...Friday! I know Yates is coming, should I expect anyone else?

Stanks for the memories.

shodan — Tue, 12 Jul 2005 17:56:38 GMT

Thanks for the birthday posts, wishes, and texts everyone. It was a rather uneventfull birthday, filled with the sound of a newly 29-year old blowing his nose, coughing, and clearing phlem from his throat. Birthday colds suck. Fortunately my spirits remained high. As did I. That's what happens when people give you green for your birthday.

My thoughts:

Birthday's, as celebrations or marked occasions, become less important to me all the time. The concept, however, is important. I believe if you are going to celebrate, do it every day. Live your life all the time. If you deserve a prize just for staying alive then you deserve it today, yesterday and tommorrow, not just once a year. Be gratefull all the time if you're going to be gratefull at all.
And damn the man.

I love you all. My friends and family are the only thing that I miss about Birmingham, and sometimes that pull is awfully strong. I will, in a rare moment of seriousness, say the following: I have spent my life observing and considering the world around me. I see the lives of other people and think about my own. I truly believe that I know, love, and am loved by some of the best human beings on this Earth. Hold it down for me in the hambone and visit me soon.

I'm soon to be sans a roommate so the extra space that we already have in my house will multiply by a factor of some number between 0 and 8000. Anyway, we'll have lots of room. Come see me. Let's go to Six Flags. Let's eat carrots together. My favorite is beef jerky.

-A bonus handie to the one who knows the reference to the last two sentences.-

Tickets, feelings, cats, AND MORE!!!

shodan — Thu, 23 Jun 2005 06:39:17 GMT

I scored two (2) tix to System of Down and The Mars Volta on the presale. They go on sale Friday, but I sleep soundly knowing mine have already been secured. So who am I taking? You silly!!!
I mean it. You could buy your ticket from Ticketmaster, or you could just buy my other one. I'm sure they won't sell out tooooo quick, but even if they don't, I'd like to sell my extra to somebody I know...face value, of course. I am siked beyond measure. That show is going to be ree-dicalus! System of a Down sleepover at my place!
So I don't know why exactly, but lately I've been reflecting on my friends and my family. I am loved and truly blessed. I am immensely proud of so many of the people I love. How many people can say they are really impressed and proud of thier friends not for what they do, but for who they are.
Also, sometimes, I make really bad choices. Been thinking about that a lot too. So then.
My cats are cuter than anything. Ever. I take such great pleasure in petting them and getting all cute with my furry friends. I have noticed a lot of people think guys with cats are wierd. Guess I'm wierd.
Two people I dig are getting hitched on Sunday. See you all at the afore mentioned hitching.

House of 1000 Corpses. Awesome.

and......
screamed at the make-believe screamed at the
sky and you finally found all your courage to
let it all go

that is all

In the ghetto.....

shodan — Sat, 18 Jun 2005 16:59:26 GMT

I type this in my room. My room has a door and a lock. And two sweet kittens.
For those who don't know the specifics, I've been living with my brother in a sweet loft. A big, open, no privacy-having loft. It was starting to suck...a lot.
Tuesday I moved in to my new home with Angel and Elle. There are no decorations in here yet but I'm really excited about doing that. Morgan and I built a 'cat condo' that we moved over here and I placed it right in front of the window in my room. They already love it. Adjusting well.
So, Pumpkin was just sitting in her favorite spot, on the monitor of my computer as I type, paw hanging down ever so cutely......it's all good right now.

shodan — Thu, 09 Jun 2005 04:49:19 GMT

Russell is the shit.
That is all

my brain is smarter than your brain

shodan — Wed, 08 Jun 2005 04:19:45 GMT

Your IQ Is 130

Your Logical Intelligence is Exceptional
Your Verbal Intelligence is Genius
Your Mathematical Intelligence is Genius
Your General Knowledge is Exceptional

A Quick and Dirty IQ Test

Thanks

shodan — Thu, 02 Jun 2005 04:01:47 GMT

to those who intro'd me to the faint. you know who you are and they might be the best band ever. not really the best band ever, but one of the best live shows ever. this makes for the second time i've seen them, and it is dance party usa from about 5 seconds after the faint start playing until they finish...a dark, macabre and celebratory dance party......so much fun. could have seen them again the next night and had no objection.
sooooooooooooooo
bright eyes was the most mediocre thing of all time. not bad. not good. just not a thing at all. mediocre. such a scene and SO affected it turned me off from the first word. the band is good. very very good. well put together, i like the MUSIC. but when conner o'pityme starts singing and gesturing in that i'm-just-so-hurt way it's all over...blah...this guy is NOT THE NEXT BOB DYLAN...JEEEEZ
i digress...
the faint ruled. go get their albums. now.
sorry i missed the beach...but this show made me feel better about it....social scene is very wierd right now. we shall see what the week brings.

p.s...tami, where the hell where you? you missed the faint!?

well, today was interesting

shodan — Thu, 26 May 2005 05:05:03 GMT

I was late for work because most of Peachtree Ave. north of Midtown was blocked off. Why?
Well, mostly it was because of the guy on the crane who was maybe going to jump off of that very same crane. Actually, it was probably entirely because of that guy.
Yup, we got a jumper. So everybody on the patio at my restaurant orients their chairs to get a better view. God forbid you should have to strain yourself to watch a man get talked down or take his life. No, no. Relax and have another martini. It was disturbing how many people just wanted him to 'get it over with'. And yes, I did hear someone ask "who's paying for all this?" regarding the traffic stoppage, the helicopters, the negotiator they sent up.

Anyway, I watched too.
And damn if that man didn't actually hang on to the bottom of the platform at one point. I thought he was going to drop off, but the guy is still there. Been like 9 hours at this point.

Some interesting stuff happened as I watched. There were at least 4 helicopters in the area at one time. This is not unusual. 1 police chopper (or ghetto bird, if you will) and 3 news helicopters. At one point, a small passenger aircraft (a Cesna, I think) flew from the south VERY low, turned tightly and took off toward the west, basically buzzing the crane. Roughly 3 minutes later, 3 F-16s or F-18s came screaming in from the east headed west, i assume after the small aircraft. Very wierd.
Later.

p.s..I didn't want the guy to jump, but I totally would have watched him if he had.

Criminals fucking up people's days part 2

shodan — Tue, 24 May 2005 14:48:38 GMT

So I may or may not have mentioned that while the police where at the crime scene dusting for prints, they get another call for a break in at the same location. As in THE SAME APARTMENT BUILDING. So the fucker is still there, and yesterday Drea and Emily saw a guy lurking around cars in the parking lot.
Apparantly, at the second break-in, the asshole(s) stole a laptop, and took the time to drink a beer and then throw it on the bed. The police lifted a print, but don't yet know if it is the tenants or the victims.
I want the guy to be caught.
More than that I want my friends to be safe.
Errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr........

Criminal's Ruined My Day....by SHODAN

shodan — Tue, 24 May 2005 04:45:21 GMT

I had a good time at NIN. It made me happy. Sanitoid thought Elle (who is fixated on my non-gay gayness) was a lezbatarian. Like maybe she starred in Lezbiana Jones and the Temple of Gay. Made me so happy. Happy times, I tell you, happy times.
So there's this picture. And it's a goooood picture. I look happy. I look good. I'm actually smiling. Not camera smiling. My friend Drea looks happy. Drea looks good. We were happy. It's a great picture. I'd planned to get a copy today. See, she lives by a Walgreen (we were gonna make a copy at Walgreen) and she has a pool on her roof. It's pretty rad. Happily rad.
We were happy this morning. Happily laying out in the happy sun before work. Happy happy. Mmmmmm, is that happy I detect? Our happy friend arrives and we happily again lay out. Ahh the happy. Happy right up until the moment we happily walked into her residence to find both our wallets missing (our friend had nothing to drop off or leave behind so she was spared the bull's-puckey that transpired), AND the entire apartment turned upside down. Although our criminal-minded neighboors (we all suspect a tenant) were nice enough to take only our money/wallets and none of Drea and Em's stuff. And the keys to my car.

(cut to shodan running to his car--tight shot)
SHODAN: (heavy breathing, looks distressed)
-His car is still there, but it's unlocked..and it's been rumaged through. The camera registers the transition from fear to awkard elation as our hero realizes that not only has his foolish habit of keeping the spare key in the car combined with the criminal's failure to lock the vehichle after auto-raping it resulted in our hero's ability to drive away with his sweet ride, but no CD's were taken. Our hero is still confused about which he is happier about.

The fucker sat in my seat. MY SEAT. He took the time to move my seat (power seat--takes time to move back and forth) all the way to the back, but not the passenger's. So I don't think he was looking for something. I think he was going to drive it. I don't know. I don't know who the fuck-hole is and I don't know why my car was not stolen. I'm out less than a hundred and my SSN is NOT ON MY LISENCE! But now someone has keys to my car. And my apartment in AL. And my brother's loft.

No means to connect me to the loft, so that's allright. I think.

Things to be happy about: No one got fucked up. Me, Drea, Jenna, or Em could have gone to the apartment while dick-face was there, seeking out money to buy crack. Every one is ok. The day did not end in loss of anyone's life; and that's quite pleasant. Two, it's only stuff. It's money.
There'll be more of that.

So fuck you fuck-ass, wherever you be.
You can't keep the kid down.
You did totally fuck up my day,
but you CANNOT keep me down.

Some good news

shodan — Sat, 21 May 2005 04:16:42 GMT

http://story.news.yahoo.com/s/ap/canada_un_earth_s_health

Whew! That's a relief. For a minute I thought we were fucking everything up.
I bet Ann Coulter is to blame.

Wonderful things technology brings

shodan — Fri, 20 May 2005 18:12:52 GMT

I posted this here....because it was the right thing to do.

As if you don't already know, Ann is the devil. And not the cool, sassy, help-you-out-in-a-pinch, bringer-of-light, Lucifer-y devil; the fill-the-world-with-pain-and-sadness, hot breath like a dog's-asshole on a hot summer day kind of devil.
Some people need to go away.
Go away Ann. Now.
Actually, I'm kind of glad she exists as the poster child for insanely right wing nutty folks. Makes it glaringly obvious how insane these people are. And not fun insane....bad insane. Bad.

awwwwwww......geek out!

shodan — Mon, 16 May 2005 17:03:13 GMT

Star Wars Horoscope for Cancer

You may whine at times, but you've developed a thick hard shell (like that of a crab).
You are strong willed and persistent - until you get what you want.
You never shy away from a fight, even when things get dangerous.
Mentally sharp, you are starting to master the elements of mind manipulation.

Star wars character you are most like: Luke Skywalker

What is Your Star Wars Horoscope?

Also...

shodan — Fri, 13 May 2005 19:38:29 GMT

For those of you who don't know, Gigantor is the shit. I went over to his place last night and got to listen to some super-secret-stash-stuff. It was, not that anyone will be surprised, awesome. I mean ridiculously good. His house is the shit, his roommate is cool, and his studio is sweeeeeeeeeeeet! You should all meet the Volcano...and you too will be screaming "Oh the humanity!"
So we went to Transit at The Mark downtown. My first 'club' experience here, really...it was insane. Pretty good music, great soundsystem...and I was introduced to the Jager-bomb! I hate Jager, but I love the bomb! Holy crap...it's been quite a while since I went somewhere that things didn't get going until 1 o clock. Cut to biscuits and gravy afterwards (a tactical error on my part), cut to more Volcano (4am -ish at this point), cut to I remember taking my shoes off, and then cut to 11AM today and I'm all passed out on Gigantor love-seat (as Nick had passed out on the couch). Came home, napped from 12PM to 230PM.
Days off are good.
Thanks again G.

Life is allright sometimes

shodan — Fri, 13 May 2005 19:19:03 GMT

So my ass still hurts....
Look at the smile on her face.....

What happens to bad boys?

I'm both amused and frightened by the look on my face. Note that my head is being forced into the chair....forced.
I learned something about myself that night. You know, I've been joking about it for a long time. Baby need spanky...bad baby need discipline....etc..

It was magic.
I liked getting spanked.
There I said it.
My ass was actually red and sore the next day (as a result, I surmise, of the number of spankings and the severity of the last spanking).

Pay attention to the part that mentions the spanking booth.

shodan — Thu, 12 May 2005 00:20:27 GMT

ROLLERGIRL RIOT
This Wednesday, May 11th at THE EARL in East Atlanta
A benefit for the Atlanta Rollergirls,
Atlanta's brand-new, all-female, flat-track, Roller Derby league!

Doors open at 9pm.
Tickets $8, available in advance from badearl.com or Criminal
Records.
Bands: Luigi, The Liverhearts, Untied States, DJ Millie

This benefit will raise money for things our fledgling league really
needs like safety equipment, rink space, and the all important: sexy
uniforms. Support Atlanta's sexiest sports team!

Buy raffle tickets to win some amazing prizes!
Get your photo with your favorite derby queen.
Buy a Rollergirls T-shirt!
Visit the spanking booth! We promise not to hurt you... much.

I say again....pay attention to the part that says spanking booth. As a visionary, I have seen my own future clearly. I will get my picture taken with my favorite rollergirl. I will visit the spanking booth. I will, DARE I SAY IT, have my picture with my favorite rollergirl, WHILST VISITING THE SPANKING BOOTH....
COME TO ME, SWEET ROLLERGIRLS!!!!!! COME TO YOUR DADDY!!!! LET ME BE YOUR BITCH!!!

damn it....no, no....fuck it

shodan — Sat, 07 May 2005 03:05:02 GMT

It sucks to catch your 'friends' in lies.

Fuck you.
Fuck you.
Fuck YOU.
YOU'RE cool..........

Fuck you, I'm out.

edit:i think i'm so mad b/c at this point in my life i think i'm better about figuring out who of the people i know/meet can be trusted to be just plain decent.....more pirate noises....yeaaaaaaaaargh!!!!!
boooo for that reminder that people sometimes let you down and life goes on......cleanse the sandy mangina

I'm hotter today than yesterday....

shodan — Fri, 06 May 2005 21:45:15 GMT

cause I worked out for the first time in, I don't know, eight-million years. My period seems to have abated (?) a little. Excersize helped A LOT! But boy does every major muscle group in my body hurt like a bitch!!! And not a sassy bitch, just an annoying bitch. Did feel good to work out though. Although I am still a trim lad, I'm not nearly as 'hard' (tee-hee) as I used to be. I figure now that I'm pushing 30 I should think about excersize, maybe even my diet! Oh the crazy talk! Anyway, I'm going to start doing stuff again that is physically taxing, we likes the way it makes us feel. Alas, I have no workout partner out here and I'm about to move in with people who think excersice is a dirty word.
Anyway, I'm 'probably' coming back to the bham sometime next week, but maybe the one after that as well...hell I really don't know. I'll be back someday. I plan on much more frequent visits after I'm all moved out of my brother's loft and I live with people who do not constantly assault me with their 'excellent' advice/opinions about what I should do with every facet of my life, at every moment of the same. Yeah, it stresses me out.

additionally, for those keeping track, project sideburn has been officially derailed and abandoned. must begin again. damn it

Help

shodan — Thu, 05 May 2005 19:05:27 GMT

I'm having a man-period. Yesterday/last night, I was happy. Very happy. Giddy even. At peace with myself and the world. One of the bestest people in the world had her a bitchin' birthday, I made bank at work, all was right with the world. Today I woke up only slightly funky, but proceeded headlong into a full-on asshole, snapstraveganza...I was foul, and I mean foul! People got snapped at/bitched at by me for not saying exactly the right thing to me at exactly the right time. Got in my car and just sat for like five minutes, no music..just sitting. Felt like a panic attack, only an angry attack instead. All the while, I cannot figure out what the hell I'm so pissed about.
So I come home, eat and sit on the couch for a while. I'm not happy, but the funk has lifted. I physically felt MAD earlier, and it just sort of floated away like it came...WTF!?
Anyway, I need to borrow some pads, apparantly I'm having a heavy flow day. I'm all emotional and shit!!! And as many of you know, I do not have feelings, so this is freaking me out--way out. I hope this is all done, but what if my funky-poo attitude comes back tonight? It's Cinco de Mayo...a once in a millenium Cinco de Mayo indeed! 5/5/5 and all that. Maybe my funky 'tude will only happen once in a thousand years as well. I need to make a pirate noise....yeARRRRRRRGHHH..........

If you're searching out for something
Don't try so hard
If you're feeling kinda nothing
Don't try so hard
When your problems seem like mountains
You feel the need to find some answers
You can leave it for another day
Don't try so hard

But if you fall and take a tumble it won't be far
If you fail you mustn't grumble
Thank your lucky stars
Just savour every mouthful
And treasure every moment
When the storms are raging round you
Stay right where you are

-Queen

yeah, it's just lyrics from a band...some get faith before they die

shodan — Thu, 05 May 2005 06:29:23 GMT

if time is my vessel then learning to love might be my way back to sea
the flying the metal the turning above these are just ways to be seen...

swoon baby starry nights
may our bodies remain
you move with me i'll feed you light
may our bodies remain

shodan — Wed, 04 May 2005 14:24:16 GMT

This one goes out to the one M.C.
The dopest miss teen there ever could be
Yoga skills phatter than Biz Markee
Some come on and get jiggy with Mo-Bears and me

Yeah, I'm no rapper....but swallowsheart is still the bomb diggity....
Much love girl, much love....

*if you got a problem with my rhymes, step up to the mike.............................

and for the record, M.C...I tried to post my goofy-ass rhymes at the stroke of midnight Birmingham time, but the wireless internet demons were crampin my steez'