A heartwarming (sort of) winter book list
7 fiction and non-fiction titles to get you through the winter
Hey gang,
I’ve been reading up a storm lately and wanted to share what’s on my nightstand right now.
Below you’ll find the books I’m recommending, brief descriptions, what I loved about each, and links to purchase on Goodreads and Amazon. Enjoy.
Non-fiction & self-help
1. Mother Hunger: How Adult Daughters Can Understand and Heal from Lost Nurturance, Protection, and Guidance
Author: Kelly McDaniel
Description: A groundbreaking exploration of maternal deprivation and attachment injury in adult women. McDaniel identifies “Mother Hunger” as the emotional burden many women carry from being under-mothered, leading to patterns of unstable relationships, self-criticism, and feelings of unworthiness. The book offers therapeutic tools and lifestyle changes to help women break destructive cycles and find healing.
My Notes:
I met Kelly last year at Kripalu, a yoga wellness center in the Berkshires. Laura McKowen, our mutual friend, invited us to be her guests during her retreat, and Kelly and I got to spend time together. That’s when I first heard about Mother Hunger, her book about the effects of absent and neglectful mothers on their daughters.
After a minor heartbreak earlier this summer that triggered some abandonment wounds related to my parents, I decided to read it. And I’m so glad I did. Even as a man, it gave me some insight into the effects that absent or neglectful parents can have on our adult lives (physically, emotionally, or otherwise).
2. Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents: How to Heal from Distant, Rejecting, or Self-Involved Parents
Author: Lindsay C. Gibson, PsyD
Description: A New York Times bestseller that explores the lasting impact of growing up with emotionally unavailable or self-involved parents. Gibson helps readers recognize patterns of neglect, understand how emotional immaturity creates a sense of abandonment, and provides practical guidance for healing childhood wounds. The book empowers readers to free themselves from their parents’ emotional limitations and reclaim their true nature.
My Notes:
I gobbled this one up in a few days, along with Mother Hunger. Easy read, and really gives you perspective on how immature parents can negatively shape their children’s lives, especially relationally. It won’t solve your problems relating to your emotionally immature parents, but it can give you some tools and insight on how to deal with them with less drama and attachment.
3. Radical Acceptance: Embracing Your Life With the Heart of a Buddha
Author: Tara Brach
Description: A transformative guide that integrates Buddhist meditation with Western psychology to help readers overcome feelings of unworthiness and self-judgment. Brach introduces the practice of Radical Acceptance—recognizing what is happening inside us and meeting it with openness and compassion. Through personal stories, case histories, and guided meditations, she shows how to stop waging war against ourselves and live more fully in each moment.
My Notes:
A great read by a fantastic teacher. A great book if you want to cultivate a closer relationship to your inner world, your emotions, and the stories you tell yourself that may be harmful. Lovely, touching, and highly recommend, especially if you want to deepen your meditation practice.
4. The Eden Project: In Search of the Magical Other
Author: James Hollis
Description: A Jungian examination of the unconscious fantasies that drive our relationships and the search for a “magical other” who will complete us. Hollis challenges readers to take greater personal responsibility in relationships rather than seeking rescue through others. This thought-provoking book explores projection, the dynamics of love, and how to move toward more authentic connections by doing our own psychological work.
My Notes:
Just starting this one, but very into it. Recommended by a fellow IG follower, this book posits that our relationships with others can only be as good as the relationship we have with ourselves. Ugh, I know. Why does it seem like all the healing we need has to come from within?
Memoir and fiction
5. Big Swiss
Author: Jen Beagin
Description: A darkly humorous and wildly original novel about Greta, a transcriptionist for a sex therapist who becomes obsessed with a client she calls “Big Swiss.” When they meet in real life by accident, an explosive, unconventional relationship ensues. Beagin’s sharp, witty prose explores trauma, sexuality, and the complexities of human connection with both tenderness and irreverence.
My Notes: Hilarious, weird, sexy novel by Jen Beagin. I read it after All Fours by Miranda July, and I have to say, I liked it better—such a kooky read with touching moments.
6. Sky Daddy
Author: Kate Folk
Description: A surreal and surprisingly heartwarming novel about Linda, a woman who is sexually obsessed with airplanes and dreams of uniting with her “soulmate plane” in a crash. Folk crafts a bizarrely compelling portrait of desire, loneliness, and the search for acceptance while living on the margins of normalcy in San Francisco. Both absurdist and deeply human, this novel explores what it means to love something—or someone—that society deems impossible.
My Notes:
Over the moon to see this book come across my feed, because Kate Folk and I know each other from my San Francisco days. I remember her giving me a short story she wrote before I took off on a year-long road trip, and it’s just a delight to now get to read her novel. Another funny, kooky read with great characters and lots of tension. Must read.
7. Just Kids
Author: Patti Smith
Description: A National Book Award-winning memoir chronicling Patti Smith’s relationship with photographer Robert Mapplethorpe in 1960s and ‘70s New York. Smith beautifully captures their journey from struggling artists to cultural icons, their life at the Chelsea Hotel, and the vibrant creative community around them. This poignant love story and elegy celebrate youth, art, friendship, and the pact two kids made to take care of each other during the hungry years.
My Notes:
Lol. I didn’t know I was reading Patti Smith’s memoir at first, because I downloaded it for my Kindle without reading the description (found it on Dua Lipa’s book list). After a while, I thought to myself, “This is such a great novel,” which prompted me to read more about it. Oh, it’s a memoir. Incredible read. Unputdownable.
Have you read any of these? Or do you have a book you want me to add to my list for winter?
Half of these are already on my nightstand and will put the others on my Libby list! I especially loved Mother Hunger, a very special recommendation from my grief guide. I really appreciated your recommendation for Adult Children of Emotional Parents on one of your earlier posts.
I keep going back to and recommend Conversations on Love By Natasha Lunn. She approached the topic of love like a research subject and explores all the various ways we love. Small little entries and you don’t have to read it in order necessarily.
I love this list! Thank you. I hope that, for future book lists, you'll recommend that your readers shop through Bookshop.org or Thriftbooks.com rather than Amazon. Through Bookshop.org, shoppers can decide which local, or woman-owned, or BIPOC-owned, or queer-owned (etc.) bookshop they want to receive the proceeds of their purchase. And Thrift Books is just what it sounds like--a way to buy used books online. Any way and every way of buying books is a better way than patronizing (extremely evil) Amazon... <3