And you only live forever

Disenchanted, Master Post

2012-05-17T07:49:58Z

Title: Disenchanted
Author: shadowfaxy
Artist: dun
Beta: stellarfuzz
Type: Wing Fic
Word Count: 9,495
Rating: NC-17
Pairings: Dark Adam/Light Adam
Warnings: sexual content, a bit of violent imagery, strong language
Summary: Adam’s feeling a little lost until he meets himself. Oh, and he sprouts a pair of wings.

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3
Link to art master post: Here

Acknowledgments: Written for cockbertbigbang and I would like to thank the mods and everyone participating there for getting me back into writing ;) Thanks to my perfect beta stellarfuzz who rescued me and made this story infinitely better. And to my artist dun who made the most incredible art for my story. You should go tell her how brilliant and talented she is here.

Disenchanted 3/3

2012-05-17T04:35:04Z

Adam wakes to someone shaking his shoulder and he blinks to see Good Adam leaning over him, “Hey, I figured I should wake you before any screaming started.” Good Adam sits up and he sees pale freckled skin in the dim light coming from the bathroom. “Our neighbors must be deaf or think we’re into some kinky shit,” other Adam muses.

Good Adam shrugs his shoulders and glances down at him. “I also thought you should be awake in case...” he doesn’t finish his sentence but Adam hears it anyway. In case it worked and this is goodbye. Of a sorts at least.

“Yeah,“ Adam says and his thoughts are still too muddled with sleep to even try getting up just yet.

It’s not too long though before Good Adam is leaning forward as if in pain. Adam feels his own wings vanish, the weight of them suddenly lifted. He also has a front row seat to see other Adam’s wings emerge and it’s remarkably seamless. They simply unfold out of his back in one giant burst that propels Good Adam forward, until his face is almost to his knees. He lets out a low groan.

If Adam hadn’t been on the receiving end of them he would have thought they would be painless from the looks of it. Adam gently trails his fingers between the wings, just letting other Adam breathe. He doesn’t know he’s going to say anything until, “The pain is the price," comes out, “For the wings.” He continues rubbing down Good Adam’s back, feeling deep breaths and brushes of soft feathers. “Something so beautiful always has a cost.”

Good Adam carefully sits back up. “Isn’t that a little excessive?” He lifts a wing to wrap in front of him and looks back at Adam. “Especially since we didn’t ask for them in the first place.”

“It’s pretty fuck up is what it is,” Adam says. “We associate beauty with pain.” Adam moves until he’d sitting on the edge of the bed, feet touching the floor. “The question is, are they worth the pain?”

Other Adam raises an eyebrow and says, “I doubt the wings are a metaphor for our life.”

Adam laughs, but there's no humor to it, “Right.”

Good Adam gives him a bleak look. “What do you want me to say?”

“I want you to get a clue. And to stop setting us up for disappointment,” Adam snaps at him.

Good Adam just looks at a loss and finally says, “I don‘t want to fight anymore.”

Adam sighs, he’s so tired of being angry and bitter about things he can‘t change. He thinks if he gives in a little, maybe Good Adam will meet him halfway. “Okay,” he whispers and rubs his face with his hands. “What do you want to do?”

Good Adam must see something on his face because he says hesitantly, “We can start small? Make some calls and see if there’s any work we’re interested in?”

Adam nods in agreement but says, “I have some conditions.”

Good Adam looks a little concerned but says, “Okay.”

“First off, no weddings. Not unless I really, really like the person.” Adam says.

Good Adam lets out a genuine laugh. “Deal.”

Adam lets himself smile for a second and then says firmly. “No lying or changing who we are to get anywhere.”

“I wouldn’t do that.” other Adam says honestly.

“And if, not when. If it all becomes too much, if it isn’t working,” Adam says steadily. “Promise me you’ll let it go before things get bad. Promise me we won’t lose a part of ourselves.”

Good Adam’s quiet for a long moment. “Okay,” he says softly. “I promise.”

***

Adam takes a long hot shower and it’s freaking heavenly. He comes out to find Good Adam on the couch and watching a muted infomercial. Adam by passes him and fixes them some tea. When it’s done Adam hands a cup to other Adam and sits beside him.

Other Adam takes a drink and says, “Thanks.”

Adam nods in reply and they watch a segment on an organizational spice rack.

“I called into work again,” Good Adam tells him.

“You trying to get us fired?” Adam asks, not that he really cares. “Oh well, someone else can serve rich assholes and pour their wine.”

Good Adam smirks. “You’re just jealous you’re the one doing the serving.”

“You know me so well.” He sees other Adam’s small smile before a big yawn overtakes him. “You can go back to bed, you know,” Adam tells him.

“I did change the sheets.“ Good Adam puts his tea on the coffee table and says, “Come with me then.”

Adam doesn’t need to be told twice.

Adam wakes up warm and with a face full of feathers. Other Adam sleeps curled inward on his side and one wing is covering Adam. He watches him sleep for a minute, knowing it’s vaguely creepy but not really caring. He looks really young like this, and with the blindingly white wings he looks angelic. Adam sits up quietly but doesn’t really plan on going anywhere.

Adam sees him snuffles in his sleep before stirring. He wakes up and looks groggily up at him and Adam grins at his spaced out look. “What time is it?” he asks.

Adam looks over at his alarm clock. “Eleven.”

Good Adam stretches and then sits up to fan out his wings before settling them back down. “Uh, what are we doing today?”

Adam eyes him, wearing only soft sleep pants and says, “I have a suggestion.”

Other Adam looks him up and down. “I just bet you do.” But he doesn’t seem too put off by the idea because he crawls over and straddles Adam’s lap. He kisses him sweetly and then says against his mouth, “This doesn’t seem to be helping our problem.”

Adam says between kisses, “Don’t care.” They make out for a while and Adam fucking loves kissing and he’s good at it. They both are really freaking good at it.

Adam doesn’t pull away until he starts rubbing off on other Adam’s ass. He asks breathlessly, “Ride me?”

Good Adam blinks at him. “My ass is amazing.”

Which Adam finds out, after a small battle to get out of their clothes and a hurried prep. Good Adam slides down him slowly and Adam almost forgets to breathe. “Fuck, you weren’t kidding.”

Other Adam grins down at him and bottoms out. Adam almost bites his tongue off as he’s engulfed in heat and incredible tightness. Good Adam lifts up and starts a halting pace and Adam’s hands grip his hips. Adam watches him move, wings fluttering out behind him with every thrust. He gets a weird thought that he’s seeing himself through someone else’s eyes, and he knows that nothing, no picture or mirror, can make you see yourself the way other people see you. In that moment he feels likes he’s truly seeing himself.

And he likes what he sees.

Adam jolts up and kisses him hard and biting. Good Adam groans into the kiss and Adam tightens his hand on other Adam’s hip and moves his other hand to his ass. He takes control and shoves other Adam forward onto his cock, fucking into him fast and hard. Good Adam slaps a hand to his chest and holds on. He chokes on a laugh and Adam sees a flash of a smile, “What?”

“Nothing,” and then laughter bubbles up again, “Is it weird to call out your own name during sex?”

Adam laughs too. “Very,” he licks his hand and reaches for other Adam’s cock. Good Adam moans and his wings snap out over his head. Adam looks up at them and says, “I think this might be the exception.”

Good Adam looks dazed, thighs trembling as he moves with Adam‘s thrusts. “Huh?”

“Say our name,” Adam whispers, wanting, no, needing to hear it. Needing some kind of reassurance.

“What? No,” other Adam says and then narrows his eyes as Adam takes his hand away from his cock. “Evil.”

Adam grins and keeps thrusting at a steady pace and Good Adam swears and reaches for his own dick. Adam grabs his wrist and holds it. “Say it.”

“Fuck,” other Adam says and there’s sweat beading his brow, “Fuck, Adam, would you just—” Adam grabs his dick and he’s coming onto Adam’s stomach after only a few hard pulls. He tightens around Adam and he lets himself go, coming so hard his eyes go fuzzy white at the edges.

They breathe deeply together until he slips out of other Adam and he says on a sigh, “I’m so proud of myself right now.”

“And pleased,” Good Adam agrees.

They clean up and then fix themselves lunch. They obviously can’t go anywhere so they stay in bed and play board games. Which turns out to be fun in a complete disaster sort of way. Adam ends up throwing Trouble across the room to Good Adam cackling in his ear. After that they watch a movie and do crossword puzzles together.

By late afternoon, after they’ve baked some only slightly burnt chocolate chip cookies, and exchanged some fantastically messy blowjob against the kitchen counter. Adam crawls into bed and starts painting Good Adam’s nails while he tries to read a book one handed. He finishes other Adam’s and is starting on his own nails when Good Adam suddenly puts his book down. “Sing to me,” he states.

Adam looks up. “What?”

“Sing to me. I want to hear it.” Other Adam reaches over and takes the nail polish out of his hand.

Adam is strangely reluctant and doesn’t know where Good Adam is going with this so he plays it off as a joke. He thinks for a moment and then starts singing Backstreet Boys really obnoxiously.

Good Adam hits him weakly on the chest and says, “Come on. For real.”

Adam still doesn’t want to give in and the sunlight reflecting off a snowy feather gives him an idea. “Well I heard there was a secret chord that David played and it pleased the Lord, But you don't really care for music, do you?” Adam sings with a bit of laughter in his voice but other Adam’s not even smiling.

In fact, he’s staring at him intensely, “Keep going.” Apparently Good Adam doesn’t find the use of biblical imagery and references to sex funny. Which Adam thinks is hilarious given their current situation. Adam finally caves when he hears a soft, “Please.”

Adam starts singing a little haltingly at first, but soon finds his rhythm, the cadence of his voice rising and falling easily with the song. He has to look away from other Adam’s gaze because it feels way too intimate. He finally closes his eyes at, “But remember when I moved in you, and the holy dove was moving too, and every breath we drew was Hallelujah.”

Adam finishes the song and feels more exposed now than when he’s on stage in front of hundreds of people.

“I sound like that?” Good Adam sounds taken aback and Adam finally looks at him. Other Adam breaks out in a grin and grabs Adam to fervently smack kisses onto him over and over. He finally pulls back enough to babble, “I mean, I know what I sound like and that I’m good, but,” he flails out a hand, “But you don’t really know. Not really.”

Good Adam’s enthusiasm is contagious. “We’re good, huh?”

“Yeah,” Good Adam says sincerely. “We’re really good.” He brushes a piece of Adam’s hair off his forehead. “I think we’re going to be okay.”

“Yeah,” Adam says and believes it.

***

They must fall asleep at some point because Adam wakes up to a flash of bright light. Everything becomes hazy and then his world is turned upside down. Images and emotions hit him all at once and for a long moment he’s completely overwhelmed.

Adam finally opens his eyes and doesn’t have to look to know he’s alone and wingless. He has two sets of memories rattling around his brain and he knows it’s going to take him a long time to sort them all out.

But for the first time in long time he feels balanced, and more importantly, hopeful. He rolls out of bed and looks for his phone, he has some calls to make.

Five years later

Adam’s first album drops to commercial success and he sends a thank you card attached to a bag of Brazilian coffee beans to the Novel Café. He figures they will reach the person they’re meant for.

The End

Master Post

Disenchanted 2/3

2012-05-17T04:17:10Z

Adam gets home to find Good Adam eating cereal and watching cartoons on the couch. He seriously looks about five when he startles at Adam’s entrance and dribbles milk down his chin. Minus the fluffy wings of course.

Good Adam hurriedly puts his bowl down and looks anxiously up at Adam. “So how did it go?”

Adam tells him everything, mostly because he thinks lying to himself, even if only by omission, could start a bad precedent.

When he’s done, Good Adam takes it better than he thought he would. He looks more thoughtful than anything else. “Well, our unsubtly paid off since we’d mostly figured out what the wings meant on our own.”

Well, one of them had anyway, but more importantly. “That was a boldfaced lie, by the way. I’m totally subtle.”

Good Adam looks amused for a second. “Uh huh. Totally.” Then he abruptly turns pensive again. “I was right though. We’re, like, the extremes of our personalities. You’re the yang to my yin, so to speak. It’s just, how do we get back together?”

“Okay, Humpty Dumpty,” Adam mocks. “Any suggestions?”

Good Adam scrunches up his nose in thought. “I don’t know. He didn’t really elaborate, did he?”

Adam scowls at him. “No, I told you everything he said. Do you know of a way to show thyself some love?”

Good Adam gives him a dry look. “How ‘bout you not being an asshole for five seconds?”

“How ‘bout you go—” Adam cuts himself off and then says awkwardly, “I’ll work on it.”

***

Things turn stilted and weirder after that, if that’s possible. They don’t talk and end up in a tense silence. When that gets boring they fight over the remote because they can’t even agree on what show to watch while they ignore each other.

“You know ignoring it isn’t going to make it go away,” Good Adam finally says.

Adam ignores him.

“I’m not giving myself the silent treatment, oh my God,” Good Adam exclaims when he continues to keep quiet.

Adam gives him a dirty look, but says, “I think I have an idea of what he meant.”

“Go on,” other Adam prods him.

“You won’t like it, but,” he pauses and then barrels on, “He said show yourself some love twice. And smiled at me. Creepily. And winked.”

Good Adam frowns. “You don’t think he meant…”

“Do I think the creepy guy I insulted while drunk meant I should have sex with myself?” Adam asks sardonically. “Yes. Yes, I do.”

“You think Luka wants us to have sex?” Good Adam asks and he doesn’t look convinced.

“I think he greatly implied that’s what we should do,” Adam says. “I got the impression this was all a big joke to him. Or a game he wants to see played out.” Adam shrugs, “Maybe he wants to help us or maybe we’re just puppets for his amusement, I don’t know.”

Good Adam eyes him intently and eventually says, “You know having sex with yourself is probably only good in theory, right?”

He nods, “Probably.”

Good Adam looks at him suspiciously, “But you want to find out anyway, don’t you?”

Adam leans slowly towards him, telegraphing his every move in case Good Adam wants to bash him in the face with a wing. When that doesn’t happen he says “I don‘t see why not,” and he kisses Good Adam softly, almost chaste, testing it out. Adam keeps it gentle, just for a second, and dimly thinks he’s not bad kisser, all soft lips and eager responses. It’s not till he tries to deepen the kiss that it all goes to hell. He and Good Adam try to take control of the kiss at the same time and there’s no give at all. It’s an awkward fight until Good Adam breaks the kiss.

“Jesus, am I always this much of a control freak?”

“Well, if you would just stop fighting me,” Adam says frustrated. Good Adam looks like he wants to protest so Adam adds, “Dude, if we’re doing this, we’re doing it right. I will not have bad sex with myself. I couldn’t stand the humiliation.”

Good Adam actually winces and then nods his head in agreement, “Alright.” Adam watches him warily for a minute and then kisses him again. He lets the kiss deepen gradually this time and is rewarded with Good Adam opening up to him. Adam grabs him by the neck and pulls him closer, mouth insistent and demanding. The kiss becomes increasingly heated until they have to break apart just to breath.

When Good Adam gets his breath back he asks, “Is it narcissistic to get turned on by yourself?”

Adam laughs, “I sure hope not. Otherwise we would have a PhD in narcissism with how much we jerk off.”

Good Adam shakes his head. “That is so not the same thing.”

Adam shrugs, not really listening. “This is going to be awesome,” he says cheerfully. Then even more brightly, “I’m going to blow you now.”

“Oh, good lord,” is all other Adam says and he takes it for a yes.

Adam slides to the floor in front of Good Adam and pushes his legs apart. Other Adam’s watching him intently and it’s weirdly hot, intense even. He focuses on unfastening Good Adam’s pants and has to almost pull him off the couch just to shove them down. Other Adam’s hard already, tenting his white briefs, and it’s strange to be looking at his own dick from this point of view. But he also kind of really wants it in his mouth, which is probably a lot weirder.

He pulls the briefs out of the way and sees Good Adam’s breathing pick up, wings fluttering with the movement. Adam doesn’t really stall after that, leaning down and licking him from base to tip, swirling his tongue as he goes. He’s surprised that he tastes so good, salt and soft skin. He moans and sucks him all the way down, closing his eyes and hallowing his cheeks.

Good Adam jerks above him and he feels something brush his cheek, he opens his eyes to see a curtain of white feathers hovering over him. Adam pulls back on a low moan and sees other Adam gripping the edge of the couch tightly.

Adam pants out an, “Awesome,” before sucking the head of other Adam’s cock back in his mouth. He pulls out all that stops, already knowing what he likes, flicking his tongue on the underside of his dick, and just a hint of teeth.

When Good Adam starts swearing and finally reaches out to run his fingers through Adam’s hair, gripping it, Adam brings a hand up and sucks in a finger along side other Adam’s cock. Adam glances up when he hears a loud groan and it’s obvious Good Adam knows what he’s doing. Adam sucks hard, saliva dripping down and he trails his finger through it and down past other Adam’s balls. He circles his hole and when he slips his finger inside Good Adam jerks his hips up and Adam has to pull off for a second.

“Sorry, sorry, oh, fuck,” Good Adam says and Adam just smirks before going back down. Other Adam trembles, trying to keep still but his hips move haltingly, like he can’t help it. Adam moves his hand, finger fucking into him before he quickly adds another. His mouth and hand find a rhythm, and it’s fucking perfect, the taste and feel of it turning him on like nothing else.

“Oh, god, I’m gonna,” Good Adam breaks off on a loud groan and comes in his mouth. Adam swallows as much as he can and then pulls back, removing his fingers and jacking him through the rest of it. Adam looks up in time to see his face still screwed up in pleasure, and he looks ridiculous, he does, yet somehow still endearing too.

Other Adam still seems out of it so Adam stands up and rids himself of his pants and underwear before dumping himself unceremoniously onto Good Adam’s lap. Other Adam wheezes a little at the movement, but then smiles softly at him. Adam kisses him lazily and takes his hand, putting it on his cock.

Good Adam chuckles into the kiss. “Totally subtle,” he says, but starts jerking him so Adam really can’t complain. He comes surprisingly fast over other Adam‘s fingers, already too worked up. Adam’s panting roughly into his neck and just revels in the feeling. He feels feathers stroke down his back.

Adam eventually pulls back enough to say, “I can fuck you next, right?”

Good Adam just laughs.

Adam’s still squished against other Adam and debating on whether to take a nap or fix himself some food before he tries another round when Good Adam says, “You might want to take your shirt off if you want to keep it.”

Adam looks up and sees how dark the room’s gotten. He gets up and pads half-naked to the window, brushing aside the curtain to see the beginnings of another gorgeous LA sunset. He’d forgotten already, and is so not ready for another appearance of wings. He lets the curtain fall back down and walks to the back of the couch. He looks at Good Adam, wrapped in wings so white they’re almost glowing in the soft light, and feels a pang at the thought of him disappearing.

He valiantly ignores it, pulling his shirt over his head and throwing it on the couch. Other Adam’s watching him, an odd heat to his eyes that’s somehow also understanding. It makes Adam uncomfortable for some reason and he looks away. He braces his hands on the back of the couch, hoping the wings aren’t as painful as he remembers.

They wait in silence but it’s not long before Adam’s back starts hurting, almost like a burn. There’s no flash of light or a dimming of his senses this time, in fact, it almost makes it worse, the pain a sharp point of clarity with nothing to distract from it. The feeling of being sliced open starts and his knees buckle, eyes tearing. Then the wings burst out, jolting him into the back of the couch. He stays there, trying to calm his breathing and the tremors he can feel in his hands gripping the back of the couch.

A hand petting his hair is what makes him look up to see Good Adam kneeling next to him. “Holy fuck,” he says shakily and other Adam’s smile is self-deprecating.

“If the wings really are our doing, I’m beginning to suspect our level of fucked up,” Good Adam tells him while giving him a hand up. Adam takes it and wobbles on his feet till other Adam steadies him.

“I’ve been wondering about that for a while now, so get in line,” Adam says even as he’s beginning to get an idea of what the wings mean, pain and all. He’s just not sure he wants to share it. Not yet.

Other Adam takes his shirt off and offers it to him but Adam waves him off. What he wants is to clean up and to put some pants on because they are seriously starting to look ridiculous.

He says as much to Good Adam who brightens immediately. “I can take a shower now.”

Adam glowers at him and then sighs in defeat. It’s not like he’s getting anywhere near the shower stall anytime soon. Fucking wings. “Fine, I’m going to find some clothes.”

Adam cleans up the best he can and puts on a pair of sweatpants while Good Adam showers. He then fixes himself a sandwich and tries to relax but the wings are making everything uncomfortable. He gives up and flops face-first onto his bed. He’s asleep before he hears the shower turn off.

Adam wakes up disoriented and it takes him a minute to get his bearings. Good Adam is trying to quietly slide into bed when he sees that Adam’s awake he whispers, “Hey, go back to sleep.”

But Adam’s suddenly aware of where he is and doesn’t think he can go back to sleep just yet. “What time is it?”

“Late, around one, I think,” Good Adam tells him and then huffs. “Do you have to hog the whole bed?”

Adam yawns and looks blearily at other Adam, “Uh huh.” He cracks his neck because it’s stiff as all hell. “Ow,” he complains, “This sleeping on my stomach business is bullshit.”

Good Adam looks indecisive for a moment before he clambers over Adam to straddle his hips, being mindful of his wings. Adam’s confused until he starts massaging the back of his neck. He lets out a mindless moan and other Adam keeps going, kneading down his spine.

It’s freaking delicious and Adam is so on board with this plan as other Adam rubs his back, moving smoothly around his wings like he’s done this a hundred times before. He feels so good and relaxed he’s almost purring with it when Good Adam grabs the base of his wings. Adam shudders at the contact and feels Good Adam jerk against his ass. It’s then that Adam realizes they’re both hard and he groans into his pillow.

Adam’s content to never move again so he figures Good Adam can do all the work. “You can fuck me, if you want,” he says lazily.

He hears other Adam inhale sharply behind him. “Yeah, okay,” Good Adam says and then he’s leaning over and fumbling with the drawer where they keep the condoms and lube.

Other Adam pulls down his sweats with a little help from Adam as he lifts his hips up off the bed. Adam hears the snap of the lube bottle opening and then Good Adam is opening him up slowly. He’s barely got a third finger stretching him before Adam’s squirming against the sheets. “Okay, okay, I’m ready.”

Good Adam pulls out and he hears a crinkle of a wrapper, then a long pause before, “Do I need to use a condom to fuck myself?”

Adam looks over his shoulder and other Adam’s half-obscured by wings that are flapping restlessly. Adam drawls, “I don’t know, is there something you want to tell me?”

Good Adam throws the condom package at his face, “Ass.”

Adam laughs and then stretches out, arms going under his pillow and spreading his legs wide so that his ass juts out. “Come on, I want to feel it.”

Other Adam mutters something he can’t make out and then he feels a hand on his hip and another on the back of his thigh. He pushes Adam’s knee out and then up until he can settle snugly between his splayed thighs. Good Adam pushes in oh, oh, so slowly and he can feel the stretch and burn of it all the way up his spine.

Adam is muffling his whines into his pillow by the time other Adam bottoms out and stills for a minute. Adam had known that he was more than adequately endowed but feeling it from this end gives him a whole new understanding of it. He feels so full and it’s exactly what he’s been craving.

Good Adam swears behind him as he starts moving, “Fuck, we got to do this more often, our ass is amazing.”

Adam tries to laugh but his head is buried in his pillow. He feels other Adam run his fingers through the feathers at the base of his wings and he shivers all over. Adam finally lifts his head up when other Adam keeps to a steady pace because it’s not want he wants, “You, ah, fuck.” Adam doesn’t know if he wants to thrust back or hump the fucking mattress. “Harder, dammit.”

He hears a cut-off laugh before other Adam slams in, shoving him across the bed. Adam spaces out after that, relishing in the feel of it; in the fucking tidal wave of pleasure washing over him. His orgasm barrels through him without anyone even touching him— his dick pulsing on the sheets underneath him.

Good Adam must feel it because he groans loudly and his thrusts turn erratic. He comes with a few final jerks and then kind of collapses onto Adam, face buried into black fathers.

If Adam had two brain cells to rub together he could admit that this was probably a little weird (he just came in his own ass, oh god) but as it is, he is too blissed out to give a flying fuck about anything right now.

Other Adam finally pulls out and Adam twitches at that but doesn’t even think about moving. Good Adam rolls off the bed and returns after a minute with a towel and wet washcloth, which finally makes Adam turn over uncomfortably onto his side.

Good Adam covers the wet spot with the towel and then throws the rag at Adam. “Help me out lazy.”

Adam grunts at him but cleans up with the minimum amount of effort and then throws the cloth onto the floor. He hears other Adam sigh as he crawls back into the bed and it makes Adam smile for some reason.

Adam yawns and watches with half-lidded eyes as other Adam struggles with the sheets before finally pulling it over himself. “You know apparently practice puts theory to shame.”

Good Adam looks baffled for a second and then he grins in amusement. “I’m totally a sex God, aren’t I?”

Adam nods and snuggles inward till he’s half on his stomach where he’s not crushing his wings. “Of course. I‘ve always been a sex God,” he says, laying his head on Good Adam’s shoulder

He brushes Adam’s hair back, looking happy. “No objections here.”

It’s quiet for a while and Adam’s almost drifting off when Good Adam asks, “Do you really think we’re wasting our time?” He shifts, jostling Adam off his shoulder, until he’s on his side facing Adam. “Wanting to be a singer?” he laughs softly, “A successful one at least.”

Adam really doesn’t have enough brainpower to have this conversation right now, so he says, “It’s not that simple.”

“Why isn’t it?” Good Adam asks. “It’s a yes or no question.”

“Why isn’t it?” Adam repeats in disbelief. “Oh, I don’t know, maybe because half the country hates everything about us. Because when was the last time we were anything more than just a punchline to a joke?”

“Fuck those people,” other Adam says hard, like he truly believes every word that he’s saying. “They don’t fucking matter.”

“If that was the case…” Adam says and then sighs, not even knowing how to deal with this much naivety. “And that’s just the beginning, what if we spend years trying to make something of ourselves and get nothing but burnt out? What if we end up hating one of the things we love the most? That is just ours.”

Good Adam shakes his head firmly. “That won’t happen to us. We won‘t let it.”

“It almost already did happened to us,” Adam says tiredly. “If we hadn’t quit theater when we did we would’ve ended up hating it. That’s how unhappy we were.”

“We’re still unhappy,” other Adam says and he sounds sad. “And I won’t give up on music because of things that may happen, and that fact that you’re scared.”

Adam suppresses a flinch at that, but retorts, “I’m not giving up and I’m not fucking scared. I just have more sense than a wet paper bag. Unlike you.”

Good Adam glares at him and then turns over, giving Adam his back.

It takes a while for either of them to fall asleep.

Part 3

Disenchanted 1/3

2012-05-16T08:40:08Z

Disenchanted

Adam wakes up in a bush as the first few rays of sunlight break through the horizon. The bush is extremely uncomfortable and he struggles to get up with little success. He starts flailing around like a fish out of water and ends up falling down onto the wet grass with a thump. Which ow, but at least he’s out of the bush. He lets out a giggle and thinks he might still be a little bit drunk.

Adam looks around and it’s still mostly dark outside, but he vaguely recognizes a park. He’s still wearing his leather pants and high-heeled boots, but his mesh shirt seems to be ripped in places. He digs in his pockets and finds his phone and driver’s license. He also finds a business card that just says in black ink,

When you find yourself come visit me at the Novel Café.

It has no name but Adam recognizes the café as one not far from his apartment. He reads it again and can’t tell if it’s supposed to be inspirational or pretentious— probably both. He shrugs and shoves it back into his pocket and tries his phone. It miraculously still works and he calls Danielle to come rescue him.

***

Danielle does, in fact, come rescue him and brings him home; she even stays to make him coffee. And pancakes, well, she tries to make pancakes but they turn out really thin and crepe-like. He sits and cradles his mug of coffee at his tiny kitchen table in his tiny apartment. He figures he can wallow in self-pity this morning since he woke up in a bush. That’s like a get out of jail free card for wallowing.

He looks up to see Danielle staring at him and he narrows his eyes at her. “Don’t look at me like that.”

She waves a spatula at him. “Like what?”

“All judgey.” He can be petulant this morning too. It’s totally allowed.

Danielle puts a plate of crepe-like-pancakes on the table and asks, “When have I ever judged you?”

Adam gives her a look. She totally judged his shirt the other day; apparently she’s not a big fan of yellow and green.

Danielle just rolls her eyes at him. “When have I ever judged you over something important?”

Which is true and Adam can’t argue with that, so he bites into a crepe thing. Danielle looks smug for a moment before sighing. “Adam, I’m just a little worried. You know I party as much as you do, but I don‘t know,” she trails off before finishing, “you don’t seem happy.”

Adam has been unhappy, truth be told. He’s known for a while that he’s been unsatisfied and a bit lost with what to do with his life. His self-awareness has only gotten him so far though, as he still has no idea what to do about it.

Adam gives her a sad smile, “Yeah, well.”

She looks hesitant for a second before asking softly, “Have you thought about going back to theater?”

“I don’t know.“ Adam had left after a particularly bad run of a show and had hoped leaving would give him some perspective. So far he’s gained nothing. He doesn’t have anything to say other than that, so he takes another bite. He grimaces and pushes his plate away, “You really are a shitty cook, you know.”

Danielle nods her head and takes a sip of her coffee. “I know.” Then she smiles evilly at him and whips out her phone. “So who should be the first to know about your new found bush affinity?”

Adam groans into the tabletop.

After Danielle leaves, Adam decides to stay home from work and mopes around the apartment before giving up and taking a nap. He wakes up around late afternoon and makes himself some soup before fixing his ass firmly on the couch. He watches crappy TV until about dusk and then he randomly gets a bout of restlessness.

He’s walking to the bathroom, thinking about taking a long hot shower, when there’s a bright flash of white, like a solar flare going off in front of his face. It blinds him and he staggers, throwing a hand up to shield his eyes. He tries to turn away, but suddenly all his senses dull, like being plunged underwater, and his back explodes in pain. It feels like scalding hot blades are slicing into him and he falls to the floor. He bites out a scream as the pain intensifies and he feels his skin split open, his back on fire, and then something bursts out of him with enough energy to shove him across the floor. His world goes black around the edges.

His vision clears a few moments later, and the first thing he notices is that his back doesn't feel like it's being cut open anymore. It’s sore, like a pulled muscle, but it’s not agonizing. The second thing he notices is the weight. There’s a heavy weight sitting on his back and he’s sure he doesn’t want to know what it is. Then he grudgingly acknowledges the fact that he’s still face-first into the carpet.

He slowly lifts his head, which feels like it weighs a ton, and then lifts up onto his forearms. He sees a black blob out of the corner of his eye and he is five seconds from completely losing his shit when he realizes what is on his back.

Wings.

Huge, dark as midnight wings spread out above him like a wave. He very slowly gets up onto his knees and looks down at the soft cascade of feathers touching his arm. He reaches out a hand and touches one, finding them to be soft as silk.

Adam’s so immersed in them, in the motherfucking wings sprouting from his back, that he doesn’t realize he isn’t alone until he hears a small cough come from the couch. Adam freezes and steels himself to look behind him. There’s man sitting on the couch, wearing white pants and a cream colored shirt and cardigan. Adam looks up at the other man’s face and sees his own. He lets out a startled gasp and almost falls back onto his ass if it weren’t for the giant fucking wings getting in the way.

This is officially the weirdest fucking day and Adam’s mind scatters into a million jumbled thoughts. He finally settles on the loudest, a litany of what the ever-loving fuck.

His freak out is interrupted. “You have wings.”

It’s his voice; he should know; he’s heard it a million times on recordings. But Adam hadn’t moved his mouth.

His clone or maybe an evil twin has a bewildered look across his face. He didn’t know his eyes and nose could scrunch up like that. Adam shakes his head and accepts that he’s either gone nuts or he’s in the middle of the realist hallucination of all time. “Yeah, they’re a pretty recent development,” Adam says this so calmly that he wants to pat himself on the back but, you know, wings. “I didn’t know I had an evil twin either, so.”

Evil twin looks affronted. “I’m not the evil one. You’re the one with black wings.”

Adam looks back at his wings and thinks other him has a point. “If I‘m the evil twin would that make you the good one?” he asks, mostly rhetorically. Trying to rationalize this is hurting head.

“If we were twins, yes,” apparently Good Adam says, “but I don’t know what we are. Or what you are.” He moves forward and touches Adam on the shoulder but jerks back quickly, like Adam might bite him.

Adam snorts, “I’m not going to hurt you.”

Good Adam looks confused. “You feel real. Like really real.”

“Of course I do. You’re the freaking hallucination!” Adam says incredulously.

“You’re the one with wings!” Good Adam sounds just as incredulous. It’s weirdly mimicry and Adam frowns. He reaches out and grabs other Adam’s arm hard. It’s warm and solid, and then Good Adam jerks his arm back. “Hey!”

The movement causes Adam’s shirt, which has been hanging on by strings, to finally give up the fight and fall off. Adam looks down at the scraps of his shirt and doesn’t remember putting it on at all. He frowns and sees that it's just one of his plain black tees. Weird.

He becomes aware of Good Adam looking at him and suddenly feels naked, and he crosses his arms. Then immediately feels silly for being embarrassed in front of what’s probably a hallucination of himself— at a good version of himself at that. He’s going to ignore the part where Good Adam didn’t feel like a hallucination at all. It’s the only thing keeping him from becoming hysterical in a very violent way.

He stands up but it takes him a moment to balance himself with the extra weight. The wings really are enormous— at least six feet long for they brush the floor when he walks to his closet. Adam examines the wings in the floor-length mirror that's on the back of the closet door, twisting and turning to get a better look at them.

“They really are gorgeous,” other Adam says behind him and Adam startles.

Adam frowns at himself in the mirror, “They’re heavy.” He looks at his naked torso and gets pissy. “And how the hell am I supposed to wear a shirt with these things.”

Good Adam gives him a funny look but shrugs and says, “Put a button up shirt on backwards.”

It's going to look ridiculous, but he's really not inclined to run around half-naked, so he takes out a plaid shirt from his closet. He pulls it on backwards and glances behind him. “Could you?”

Good Adam nods and pushes his wings aside, getting underneath them to button up the shirt. He pauses and then Adam feels fingers brush between his shoulder blades. He slides his fingers to the left and then down to where the wing meets skin. It’s still tender and Adam inhales sharply, and other Adam brings his hand out covered in small flakes of dried blood.

Adam turns and lifts the wing, trying to find where it came from, but only sees small, downy feathers where the wings merge with his back. “I think it’s from when they came out,” other Adam tells him, sinking his hands back into the feathers. He finally finishes buttoning the shirt, only getting a few buttoned on the top and the bottom, but at least the shirt will stay on.

Good Adam lets his hand flow through the feathers as he pulls away. “They’re so soft,” he says, almost reverently.

Adam holds back a shudder at Good Adam’s touch. And, wow, apparently the wings are really freaking sensitive. Good to know.

Good Adam seems reluctant to stop touching them and asks, “Can you move them?”

“How the hell should I know?” Adam snaps, irrationally irritated all of a sudden. He’s had these things all of five minutes.

Other Adam rolls his eyes. “Try it.”

Adam glares at him but figures trying can’t hurt anything. Nothing happens for a few minutes and Adam gets frustrated, the fuckers won’t move, when they suddenly snap out from his body. One of them hits Good Adam in the face and knocks him down.

Adam starts laughing, partly because he’s happy he figured it out, but mostly because other Adam landing on his ass is hilarious. He’s laughing so hard his wings are shaking and Adam pulls them back, then folds them up against his body. They move like any other limb, but they're weak, probably from never having been used before.

Good Adam gets to his feet with a wince. “I didn’t say brain me to death with them.”

Adam’s laughter slowly dies off and then he’s just staring at his own face— which is not getting any less weird.

Good Adam still seems a little grumpy when he asks, “So what do we do now?”

Which is a good question. “I have no idea.”

***

What they do is talk a lot and find out that they have the exact same memories. And birthmark. Because they are the same person. Obviously. The main difference seems to be Adam’s mystifying appearance of wings. But after Adam gets past the incredibly strange sensation of talking to himself, he realizes that their personalities seem to be opposing. Like total opposites. He honestly doesn’t remember himself being that sensitive. Or that perky. The good (hah!) thing was that he really only wants to punch himself in annoyance once, so he counts it as a win.

“So then I puked in—” Adam recounts the night of too much tequila. Or one of them anyway.

“—in her purse.” Good Adam finishes for him and puts his face in his hands, like the memory is too much for him to take. “I can’t believe I did that.”

Adam laughs because, yeah, that hadn’t been one of his finest moments. He yawns and stretches an arm along the back of the couch. He’s sitting angled towards Good Adam, wings making it uncomfortable to sit back against the couch. “Say I am having a complete and utter mental breakdown, why would I hallucinate myself in a cardigan?”

Good Adam looks like he’s about to complain and Adam waves him off. “Fine, fine. If you’re hallucinating why would you hallucinate me?”

Good Adam seems to mull it over before saying, “Maybe it’s cautionary? Show me what I could become?”

Adam laughs and says, “What, I’m the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come with wings?” He leans his head against his arm and thinks out loud, “Besides what do I get out of it? Don’t ever wear white pants or become obnoxiously nice?”

Other Adam concedes his point, “Yeah, I guess not.” He’s silent for a while and then says, “Maybe we’re not hallucinating at all. Maybe… maybe we were split in half and I’m the good part of me and you’re the evil part of me?”

“I resent that, you know. It’s not like I’m out kicking puppies in the street,” Adam says, mildly insulted. “And I like this all being a figment of my imagination idea better.”

“I was going with evil relative to me but, yes, obviously the definition of evil is puppy kicking,” Good Adam deadpans.

“Obviously,” Adam echoes him and yawns again, realizing how late it’s gotten. He sits up and says, “I’m tired. You can disappear now or sleep on the couch.”

Good Adam ignores the first part and says indignantly, “And you’re nuts the couch is two feet long.”

“Fine, sleep on the floor; I don’t care. I’m going to bed.” Adam walks to his bed and starts pulling back the covers.

“I know when these floors were last cleaned and if you think I’m sleeping on them, I’m dumber than I thought.” Good Adam follows behind him and continues, “Besides the bed’s mine too and big enough for the both of us.”

Adam’s too tired to argue anymore and is already busy trying to figure out how to sleep with these big-ass wings. “Alright, but you kick me in your sleep, I’ll smother you with feathers.”

Adam shakes his head at him and says, “You’re kind of an asshole, you know that?”

Adam ignores him and struggles to get comfortable. He finally rolls clumsily onto his side, and when that doesn’t work, he flops onto his stomach. His wings fall around him to encase him in warmth. Good Adam crawls into bed and turns so his back is facing him. “Goodnight,” he tells Adam.

Adam keeps silent for a moment before saying, “I’m not going to tell myself goodnight, jackass.” He softens his words by moving a wing to cover Good Adam though.

A weary sigh is the last thing he hears.

Adam jerks awake to what feels like a jolt of electricity going through him. He rolls over and to his amazement his wings have vanished. He hears thrashing and then a solid thump, then screaming. Adam scrambles across the bed and sees Good Adam panting harshly against the floor.

He’s also sporting a brilliant pair of white wings.

“Oh, for fuck’s sake.”

***

It’s morning and Adam easily figures out what that means. He had his wings all night and other Adam got his at dawn. His were also dark as night and Good Adam’s are bright as day. The symbolism is blatant enough to choke on. He just wishes he knew what he’s supposed to get out of it, or why it‘s happening at all.

Adam wordlessly takes off his shirt and hands it over. He then walks to the kitchen and makes some coffee. He has a feeling he’s going to need it more than usual today. Good Adam pads into the kitchen still looking a little shaken up. Adam knows how he feels; the wings bursting out fucking hurts.

Adam silently buttons him up, a reversal of last night. He lets himself stroke a finger down a soft feather before saying, “You‘re not a hallucination and I still have no fucking idea what‘s going on.”

He sits blearily down at the kitchen table and continues. “What about you?”

Good Adam turns the other kitchen chair around and sits backwards on it, wings spreading out slightly behind him. He shakes his head. “Obviously something happened to cause this. Or someone? But I can’t fathom who or why?”

“I feel like I should point out that this is absurd, like, completely and utterly absurd. Just, you know, for the record.”

Good Adam smiles at him and lifts a wing. “Noted.”

Adam sighs and says, “Alright, let’s backtrack. What did we do yesterday that was weird? Out of the ordinary?”

Good Adam gives him a blasé look. “Bush man? Ring any bells?”

Adam scoffs, “I was drunk, that’s not—” He cuts himself off as he suddenly remembers. He jumps up, making the kitchen chair skids across the floor as he runs to his pile of dirty laundry. “Oh my God, we are so, so stupid,” he exclaims as he rummages in his leather pants pocket.

He pulls out the crumpled card and waves it at other Adam. “I can’t believe I didn’t remember this sooner.” He reads the card again and mutters, “When you find yourself... isn’t that just a barrel of laughs?”

Good Adam’s grinning at him, excited, but then abruptly looks dejected. “I can’t go anywhere with these things.” He ruffles his feathers for emphasis and Adam laughs at him.

“No, not unless you want to be on the six o’clock news,” Adam calls out, “And trying to convince people that you don’t know Jesus!” He chuckles to himself and roots around for clean clothes to put on.

Adam gets ready in record time and hears an overly cheerful “Good Luck!” before he’s out door.

***

Adam waits in a back booth for twenty minutes mainlining coffee and getting increasingly twitchy. The waitress probably thinks he’s in the middle of a crack withdrawal, and he’s waiting for who the hell knows what.

He’s humming Knocking on Heaven’s Door and drumming on the tabletop when a short dark haired guy slides into the booth opposite him. The dude’s attractive, handsome face, and all wiry muscle. Adam watches him order a cup of coffee from the waitress and thinks the guy must be the least intimidating person alive. The dude’s really short.

The guy turns to him and smiles knowingly at him. “Adam, hey, I was wondering when I’d see you again.”

Adam picks his words carefully; he should probably get as much information as he can before choking the little shit to death. “Yeah? Funny, since I don’t remember ever meeting you.”

“No?” the guy pauses to thank the waitress for his coffee, “Alright, let me refresh your memory then. It was late and you were all alone, sitting on a park bench. When I walked by you were rambling to a lamppost about, and I quote, ‘If life is a meaningless string of occurrences then why wasn’t I born a bush. Bushes don’t fail at life.’ Only said with quite a bit of slurring and a few more hiccups.”

Adam winces and vows to stop drinking for the near future. “So did we talk?”

The dude’s smile turns up a notch. “I gave you my card and you said, ‘Thanks, wee little man.’”

Adam refrains from banging his head against the table. “So what’s your name?”

There is laughter in the dude‘s voice as he answers, “You can call me Luka.”

“Okay, Luka,” he lowers his voice, “Tell me how to fix it.”

“You are in some desperate need of some self-love, my friend.” His smile widens and, wow, that is getting creepy. “Show yourself some.” The waitress arrives again and asks if they need anything else before topping off their coffee cups.

When she‘s gone Adam says, “That’s it?” His voice raises in disbelief, “What does that even mean?”

“Hmm.” Luka doesn’t answer as he takes a drink of coffee. “All you need is love,” he singsongs and Adam’s two seconds from beating his smug face in with his own coffee mug.

“Are fucking kidding me? Why would you do this?”

Luka’s eyes turn eerily dark and Adam has to suppress a shiver. “Because you don’t believe in yourself. Your self-confidence and self-worth are abysmal. It‘s a pity, really.”

That stings a little. “What’s your point?”

Luka’s eyes flash with something, like they’re reflecting candlelight, and it’s doing an awesome job of freaking Adam out. “You could be great, Adam. If only you would let yourself.”

Adam’s freaked out enough not to say, ‘Yes, Yoda,’ but he’s got to know one more thing. “And the wings? What the hell are they for?”

Luka gives him a blank look. “Wings?”

“You know, the giant black and white wings,” he spreads his hands apart indicating the giant fucking wingspan, “Sprouting out of us!” He flails out a hand for emphasis.

Luka blinks at him and then bursts out laughing. “You’re as subtle as a bomb going off, aren‘t you?” he wheezes.

He’s totally laughing at Adam’s pain. “It actually hurts. A lot.”

Luka wipes his eyes and says, “Listen, I just set things into motion, you’re the one who decides how it happens.”

What. “What.”

Luka just grins and drains the last of his coffee. “You can send me a thank you card in four or five years.” He gets up from the booth and winks at Adam, “Just show thyself some love, Adam, and you’ll be golden.” Then he nonchalantly strolls out the door.

Adam stares blankly at the door and tries to process the conversation. It doesn’t work so he orders himself some pie. Everything’s better with pie.

Part 2

Pour Yourself Over Me, Master Post

2011-04-10T19:16:53Z

Title: Pour Yourself Over Me
Author: shadowfaxy
Artist: xeyra
Type: Romance, Friendship
Word Count: 7,445
Rating: NC-17
Pairings: Adam Lambert/ Darren Hayes, (brief Darren Hayes/ Richard Cullen)
Warnings: N/A
Summary: Darren Hayes meets Adam Lambert in 2007 before he becomes famous. Can their short time together help each other reconcile their past and give them hope for the future? Or will they just have a lot of sex?

Link to fic: Part 1 | Part 2
Link to art master post: Here

Acknowledgments: A huge thank you goes out to my beta polkera. I can't stress enough how much she made this story better in every way possible. And to my artist xeyra for the beautiful artwork she made me. I'm in love with it all, and everything is prefect so go tell her that!

A/N: Written for cockbertbigbang. The premise of this story was a little hard, logistics wise, but I think I made it work okay in the end. The title's from Darren Hayes, I Like The Way. Feedback, of any kind, is always welcome!

Pour Yourself Over Me 2/2

2011-04-07T22:19:26Z

Darren wakes up to a warm mouth on him. He groans as he becomes fully awake and sees messy black hair bobbling as Adam sucks him. He comes down Adam’s throat two minutes later and pulls him up to kiss him, tasting come and morning breath and not giving a fuck.

Adam breaks the kiss and grins at him. “I made pancakes.”

Darren thumps his head back on the pillow and tries to relearn how to breathe. “Blowjobs and pancakes? I have a feeling this is going to be a good day.”

Adam laughs his agreement.

*****

They shower together first, to conserve water of course, and Darren returns the favor, jerking Adam off lazily in the hot water, soap and spunk being washed down the drain as Adam comes for him on a long drawn out moan. They finish washing each other slowly, relaxed and post-orgasm happy.

They’re smiling and giggling like idiots as they dress (Adam makes him borrow some of his clothes and they’re only a little too big,) and head to the kitchen to wolf down the breakfast Adam made earlier.

Adam takes a sip of his coffee as Darren takes the last bite of a pancake. “So,” Adam starts, “You have to leave anytime soon?”

“No,” Darren replies. “Actually, I was planning on driving to my house in San Francisco and… staying there for the indeterminate future.” Darren takes a drink out of his own mug. “So no, I don’t have anywhere to be.”

“Me neither.” Adam starts stacking their dishes and asks, slightly hesitant, “You could stay here, for the weekend? If you wanted?”

“I would like that,” Darren answers, no thought necessary. He pauses for a moment, then continues, “Plus, you still haven’t fucked me. I can‘t leave yet.” Adam chokes on the sip of coffee he'd just took and Darren grins at him.

“Evil,” Adam says to him. “But you’re right, I think we should stay in in bed all day watching bad TV and having lazy sex. What do you think?”

“I think it sounds perfect.” They get up at the same time and Adam backs him against the kitchen sink before kissing him, slow and soft like they have all the time in the world. Adam tastes like coffee and maple syrup and Darren chases the flavor out of his mouth until it’s gone and there’s nothing left but the taste of them. They make out in the kitchen until their mouths are numb and red and Adam finally drags him to the bedroom.

They end up watching shitty Lifetime movies about selling babies, and one about a mom creepily sabotaging her daughter’s relationships, and just generally being in each other’s personal space.

They lose all their clothes by the end of the first movie; but it’s playful, no rush for completion, just getting to know someone through touch. Adam even falls asleep for a little while with his head on Darren’s lap and it make him feel weirdly protective and a lot older, for the first time since he got here.

He cards his hand through Adam’s soft hair and finally lets himself think about what he’s been studiously avoiding. It hurts, but he finds out that he’s actually at peace with it. He knows what he’s doing here, it’s a gorgeous vacation, an escape from reality, and he’s simply going to enjoy it while it lasts.

“Whataya thinking about?”

Darren looks down at his lap and Adam’s looking back at him, sleep mussed and with a small frown on his face.

“Hey, sleeping beauty’s awake,” Darren says.

“What’s that?” Adam asks, sounding sleep rough. He’s looking at Darren’s hand on his shoulder. More specifically, he’s looking at the ring that Darren’s been unconsciously fiddling with.

“My wedding ring,” and then wonders if he should have said that as Adam jerks up, wide awake, and looks at him incredulously.

“You’re married! When! Didn’t I ask you that before we had sex?” Adam sits up and edges over to the side of the bed.

Darren parses out his questions, “Yes? Uh, last year. And no, you asked if I had a wife which I don’t. Although, I do have an ex-wife but the less said about that…” Darren trails off as Adam gets up and starts babbling.

“Oh god, I’m a home wrecker. My mother’s going to kill me.”

“Adam,” Darren tries but is talked over.

“See this is another example of why we need gay marriage. I didn’t even think to look for a ring because we can’t get married. You’ve been wearing the ring this whole time! So two-timing bastards don’t even have the need to take it off–”

“Adam, we’re separated,” Darren exclaims, cutting off his rant and Adam goes silent, dropping the hands he’d been waving around for emphasis.

“Oh,” Adam murmurs, sitting back down on the edge of the bed. “Well, I feel stupid. Um... separated?”

Darren laughs and it isn’t pretty. “Yeah, as in he’s probably applying for dissolution as we speak. You know, the gay equivalent of divorce. Except, equal should never be in the same sentence as gay because we have to fucking call it dissolution.”

Adam looks at him in concern. “I’m so sorry. Can I ask what happened?”

Adam looks so generally sympathetic that Darren smiles at him. “I don’t know, life happened, I guess.” Darren looks down and plays with the ring on his finger. “I loved him, hell, I still love him, but I guess it just wasn’t enough.” Darren’s proud of himself for only sounding slightly bitter.

“Bullshit,” Adam tells him and Darren jerks his head up. “That’s an excuse people tell themselves to make themselves feel better. When they give up.”

He sounds angry and Darren’s head is spinning trying to keep up with Adam’s mood swings. “What? Are you younger than I thought or really just that naïve?”

“Loving someone is hard, everyone knows that. Something that great has to be, or it would be meaningless.” Adam looks upset and gestures at Darren as he talks. “People say that shit, that love wasn’t enough or it wasn’t meant to be, when they don’t want to try anymore. When they give up and they don’t want to admit it because maybe, just maybe, it wasn’t worth it anymore. They weren‘t worth it anymore.”

Darren sees something in Adam’s eyes and understanding dawns on him. They aren’t talking about him anymore. “Did you give up?”

Adam looks self-conscious, but then laughs harshly, “I guess I did. We both did.”

“Do you still love him?” Darren asks.

“I’ll always love him.” Adam sounds wistful, but there’s a sharp edge to it. The wound is still obviously raw.

“But it wasn’t worth it anymore?” Darren feels a tightness in his chest that he doesn’t want to examine at all.

Adam looks unbelievably sad and whispers, “No, no it wasn’t.”

They sit in silence for a few moments, both lost in their own thoughts and worries. Darren doesn’t want to think about what if’s and could have been’s. He’s here to forget just how much his life sucks at the moment, not reveal in it.

Finally, Darren pulls Adam to him until he falls onto his lap, asking, “Hey, wanna do something fun? I kill at karaoke.”

Adam brightens considerably. “I have an idea.”

They don’t make it out of the apartment: Adam makes Darren sing with him, and there’s a distinct lack of clothes. It’s fun and easy, something that’s been missing in his life lately. After a parade of Madonna hits, Adam coerces him into singing some of his own songs, so he goes acappella on I Forgive You and Sense of Humor. Darren feels very self-conscious as Adam watches and listens to him intensely, so to lighten the mood again he starts singing Insatiable. He only makes it half way through the song before Adam tackles him onto the couch. They don’t get back up for a while.

Later, Darren realizes that although Adam is passionate and excited while talking about music, he’s silent about his job. He remembers last night’s lack of enthusiasm for doing theater.

“Hey, tell me about Wicked. Who do you play?” he asks a still debauched-looking Adam, laying across the couch with his feet in Darren’s lap.

“I’m an understudy for Fiyero and it‘s great, I love doing theater.”

“But?” Darren prods.

Adam sighs, “But it’s very… structured,” Adam sits up and runs a hand through his messy hair. “I want more, I want to be spontaneous, to create something. To, fuck, sing my own songs, you know?”

“Yeah, I might know what you mean,” he says with a teasing smile. “Have you thought of trying something else?”

“I was in a band for a bit, which was fun, but not something I want to do forever.” Adam looks hesitant and asks, “Can I tell you something? If you promise not to laugh?”

Darren snorts and waves a hand at them only in their underwear. “We’ve been practically naked all day. I think you can tell me anything you want.”

Adam smiles but then says quickly, “I’m thinking of trying out for American Idol.” Adam watches him like he’s a bomb ‘bout to go off, but Darren just shakes his head.

“You know how I became the lead singer of Savage Garden?” Darren asks.

“No.”

“I answered an ad in a magazine for an audition to be a lead singer for a band called Red Edge.” Darren smiles in remembrance. “If I hadn’t answered that, me and Daniel never would of started Savage Garden.” Daren laughs and says, “Where the hell would I be now if I hadn’t gone to that audition? So, why would I think trying out for American Idol be funny?”

“I’ll have to quit my job.” Adam says, mostly to himself, “I won’t be making any money.”

“Well, if you fail and become homeless you can come live with me and be my pool boy.” Darren smirks and has to dodge the couch pillow Adam throws at him. He laughs, “I’m lying. I don’t have a pool.”

Adam giggles and sits on him. “I would look good in those tiny shorts.”

“You should try it, you know.” Darren says and kisses his cheek. “You’ll regret it if you don’t.”

“I know,” Adam says, and leans down for another kiss.

For dinner Adam makes them grilled cheese sandwiches and soup, and they eat like starving men. Afterward, Adam decides to paint his nails and grabs Darren’s hand and starts painting his once he’s finished with his own. Darren’s amused as Adam keeps rambling, probably on the meaning of life, only commenting when he’s done. “Blue is probably more my color,” Darren says dryly, inspecting his black nails.

Adam blinks at him. “Oh,” and then he brightens up, “You should let me do your make up.”

Which is how he ends up sitting on the bathroom sink with Adam between his legs applying eyeliner to him. Darren lets himself be manhandled finding it weirdly enjoyable.

Adam’s focused on his eyes, but he suddenly exclaims, “You know, I’m really glad I brought you home with me.” Adam smears a thumb under his eye and Darren tries not to laugh at him. Seriously, what is Darren, a puppy? “Honesty, you’re not exactly the type of guy I usually take home with me.”

Darren tries to sputter out a laugh without getting his eye poked out. “Huh? What type of guy do you usually go for?”

Adam grins and hovers the pencil over his eye. “Hold still. And, um, my type is usually someone younger, smaller, and prettier than me.”

“Are you saying I’m old?” Darren scoffs, batting Adam’s hand away from his eye. “And not pretty?”

“What, no! You’re very pretty. I was just saying I’m glad you’re here is all.” Adam looks faintly horrified and Darren can’t keep a straight face anymore, bursting into laughter.

Adam’s confused for about two seconds, narrowing his eyes and muttering, “I hate you,” but there’s amusement lacing his words as he gently grabs a hold of Darren’s chin. “Now shut up and hold still.” Darren stops laughing, but he can’t keep the smile off his face. It matches Adam’s, so he figures it‘s okay.

It’s dark, and Adam’s hovering over him, shadowed and blurred, hot breath against his neck. Everything is slow and quiet, just the sound of skin on skin as Adam takes him a part. His fingers slip on damp skin as Adam slides into him achingly slow and Darren feels like he‘s burning up. He arches into Adam as he sets a leisurely pace and it’s good, sweet even. Darren drowns in sultry pleasure for what feels like hours until he kisses Adam as sparks shoot through him and he comes with Adam’s mouth on his.

Afterwards he falls asleep in a hot, sweaty mess; Adam tangled around him.

*****

The next day, Adam wakes him up and takes him out to breakfast at cute café where they eat outside in the sunshine. He convinces him to take a trip to the beach with him and they spend a glorious day in the sun; playing in the water and getting sand all over them. When it gets too hot and Adam starts turning a bright pink, they go out for ice cream and head home. They’re exhausted, and after Darren smears aloe all over Adam they pass out together in bed.

Darren wakes up in the dark and is disoriented for a minute, thinking he’s back home in London, before he realizes it’s Adam beside him. It makes him feel off kilter and upset in a way that he hasn’t felt all weekend. Darren knows he’s got to leave in the morning, go back to his messed up life, and knowing that he couldn’t possibly stay here just upsets him more. He wakes Adam up with a kiss, wanting one more night with him, and Adam seems to get it, matching his desperation with his own. It’s over too soon and Adam falls back asleep, but Darren stays awake, waiting for dawn to lighten the room on a new day.

*****

Darren dresses in his own, newly laundered, clothes. Making sure that he has his wallet and keys, he walks into the kitchen to see Adam drinking coffee and playing with the rings on his fingers.

Adam looks up as he enters and asks with a strained smile, “You all set?” Darren nods, not really knowing what to say, and pats his pocket. He pulls a folded piece of paper out and hands it to Adam.

“What’s this?” Adam asks as he takes it.

“Every number I have or that I could think of,” Darren explains, “It’s, just, I have my own record company and if things don’t work out like you want, you’ll have another option.”

Adam’s speechless, and it makes Darren smile for the first time this morning. “You’re amazing, Adam. I probably wouldn’t have noticed you if you weren’t.” Darren pulls him up out of the kitchen chair. “The sex was totally just a bonus.”

Adam laughs at that and hugs him. “I don’t even know what to say.”

“Just say you’ll try. Really, you just need someone to take a chance on you.” Darren says as he breaks the hug. “And that you’ll take care of yourself, okay?”

Adam’s smile is a little sad. “I will. To everything.” Adam kisses him, gentle and sweet. “Darren, I, god... thank you.”

Darren nods and turns away, a little choked up despite himself. He kisses Adam chastely one last time and walks towards the door. He’s turning the door knob when he hears Adam behind him.

“Is he worth it?” Adam asks, and Darren doesn’t even try to pretend he doesn’t know what Adam’s talking about. He doesn’t turn around, and he doesn’t say anything for a long while.

“Yes,” Darren finally says and it comes out painful, a hard truth he hadn’t wanted to face.

Darren feels a hand on his shoulder and turns to see Adam smiling softly at him. “Then what are you still doing here?”

Darren hugs him hard, almost knocking him down, and clutches at him. “Thank you,” he says, voice tight.

He leaves with red eyes, a new plan, and a dash of hope.

London, June 27, 2007

Darren arrives on his doorstep exhausted and terrified. He knocks on the door and waits. Finally, the door opens and Richard’s standing there, looking confused and more than a little angry.

“Can we talk?” Darren blurts out in a hurry, not wanting the door to be slammed in his face. “Please?”

Richard looks like he’s actually thinking of doing just that, but Darren throws out a hand, clutching the door to keep it from being shut. His chipped black nails are dark against the white door and he takes a deep breath. “Just talk, I promise. Richard, please.”

Richard relents and lets him walk past. It’s a start.

*****

San Francisco, March 17, 2009

“I swear, the older I get the more horrendous that flight gets,” Darren complains as he flops across the bed. “I’m beat, man. I could sleep for a week.”

Richard’s already unpacking as he rolls his eyes. “It’s only seven something. Go take a hot bath, okay? I’ll fix us something to eat.”

“Have I told you lately how much I love you?” Darren struggles up off the bed and kisses Richard on the way to the bathroom. “’Cause I do. A lot,” Daren calls and can practically hear Richard straining his eyes from rolling them so hard. He smiles.

Darren comes out the bathroom relaxed and sees Richard watching TV and cooking, what looks like some kind of pasta dish, and gets his hand smacked when he tries for a taste.

Darren pouts and makes himself a cup of tea. He turns to the TV and asks, “Whatcha watching?”

“American Idol. I know how much you like Simon,” Richard tells him absently, and Darren flicks the back of his head as he walks toward the couch. He looks up in time to drop his cup of tea, vaguely hearing it shatter as it hits the floor. “Oh my god.”

His eyes are riveted to the screen but he hears Richard coming up behind him. “Hey, what happened?”

“I know him,” Darren says weakly and watches the guy on screen talk to Ryan Seacrest.

Richard looks lost, looking at the TV and then back at Darren. “Uh, what?”

“I had sex with him,” Darren says stupidly and watches a clip of Adam talking to Randy Travis.

Richard still looks lost, but also a little amused. He raises an eyebrow and says, “Go on.”

Darren rips his eyes away from the screen and looks at Richard. He hesitates before beginning, “Remember that summer when we were split up? ‘Bout two years ago?”

Richard sits down on the couch and says, “Of course.”

Darren joins him and continues, “I, uh, I met him at a cabaret after one of my shows. I spent the weekend with him.” Darren’s a little nervous, even though they had both already admitted that they hadn’t exactly been celibate while broken up. They still haven’t really talked about it, let alone had it thrown in the other’s face like this.

Richard just watches as Adam does a trippy rendition of Ring of Fire and murmurs, “He’s good.”

Darren remembers and smiles. “I know.” He looks back at Richard and shares his smile. “You know, he actually helped me realize what an idiot I was for letting you go.”

Richard looks surprised and turns back to the TV. “Really?” Darren nods and Richard looks thoughtful. “We should send him a fruit basket.”

“We should vote for him,” Darren says and grins when he sees Richard write the number down.

London, May 30, 2009

“Your husband sent me a fruit basket,” Darren hears as soon as he answers his phone.

“What? Who is this?” Darren asks, confused.

“I’ll give you a hint. I was just voted runner up on this year’s American Idol,” there’s a cough, “And we’ve had sex.”

“Adam,” Darren exclaims. “What? I mean, hey, how are you?”

Adam laughs and says, “I’m good. Really, good.” There’s a pause and Adam continues, “So, why did your husband send me a fruit basket?”

Darren laughs self-consciously. “Oh, um, we saw you on Idol and I told him about you? And that you might have helped us get back together?”

There’s silence on the other end, and then a deep inhalation of air. “You told your husband that a fling with a LA club kid made you get back together with him... and he sends me a fruit basket?”

“Um, yes?” Darren says hesitantly.

Adam bursts out laughing, and it cackles across the phone. “When can I meet this lovely, lovely man?”

Darren grins and says, “When you’re done taking over the world with your music.”

“What about the next time I’m in London?” Adam asks him with another laugh.

“Yeah,” Darren answers, and he’s overcome with a fierce joy that he’d met Adam Lambert. “I would like that.”

Pour Yourself Over Me 1/2

2011-04-07T21:41:31Z

Los Angeles, June 22, 2007

Darren leaves the venue in an adrenaline-induced euphoria, and he doesn’t want to ever come down. He will though; he’ll go to his empty hotel room and crash like a motherfucker. Or like the old person he is.

But he doesn’t want to go to his hotel and crash like an old person. He wants to have fun and live in the moment like the happy person he is (except for when he’s not). He still has a job that he loves and he wants to celebrate that.

He goes to Fubar, a gay club, and twenty loud minutes later he realizes that he is a day and ten years too late. The fruity pink cocktails the bartender is serving hint at him that he could have fun if he had a few more, but he really doesn’t want to go home in a cab. Or worse, pass out in a ditch and get his picture published in a tabloid that no one even reads. He sadly puts the pink, frothy drink down and leaves before he develops a full blown headache or loses his hearing.

He ends up in a cabaret that’s not too expensive, and as soon as the waiter sets his glass down, the music starts up and a pretty black haired guy comes out to sit on a stool.

The guy starts up a banter with the audience, and Darren wonders if he should order that delicious looking dessert two tables over. He decides that he should, even though his treadmill-running-self will hate him in the morning. He doesn’t start paying attention to the stage until the guy starts singing– he’s good. Really good. Darren sits mesmerized at the guy belts out What’s Up only jolting out of his captivation when the waiter appears out of nowhere and asks him if he wants anything else.

Darren orders some more wine and turns back to the stage as the crowd applauds loudly. He joins in, hoping that the guy isn’t done with his set yet. His wish is granted as the guy stays on his stool and starts singing again, after a few minutes. Darren is probably staring a little too intensely as the guy sings three more songs, but it’s not ‘till he starts singing Come Home that Darren gets actual shivers down his back and has to look away. The song resonates a little too close to home, pun not intended.

The guy leaves the stage to a standing ovation and goes to sit with a group of excited friends who draw him into their midst, patting him on the back and offering congratulations.

Darren sits back down and contemplates for the trillionth time how lucky he’s been and how it’s a miracle that he’s still doing what he loves. The guy has enough talent to get a record deal ten times over; but as Darren watches him laugh with his friends, gesturing excitedly, he can see why it would be almost impossible for him to get signed. He’s good looking, but is obviously wearing make up and nail polish, and to Darren’s amusement, a Bowie t-shirt. If his gaydar is right, and he weirdly hopes it is, he’s out and proud. On the whole, a shark is more likely to get a record deal than this guy, especially in America, talent or not.

It makes Darren’s chest ache. If he had been anything other than a confused mess when he had first gotten famous, he wonders how differently it would have gone. Ten years can change just about everything.

Darren doesn’t realize he’s staring at the guy, which is pretty creepy now that he’s not on stage, until the guy looks right at him and cocks his head to the side. Darren takes this as the invitation it most likely isn’t (It was probably more of a “Why is this creepy guy staring at me?” look.) and gets up with his glass of wine.

Before he can think better of it, he’s walking toward the guy and his friends. Holding out his hand, he introduces himself, “Hi, I’m Darren.”

The guy looks amused, but he shakes Darren’s hand and replies, “Adam.”

Darren smiles at him and tries to think of something to say so this doesn’t turn awkward. He blurts out, “So you’re kinda amazing,” he sputters, “Singing, I mean your singing is amazing.” Darren wants to smack himself; he hasn’t sounded this stupid since Britney.

Adam just laughs and drags a chair from the next table over. “Flattery will get you everywhere.”

Darren sits down and Adam introduces him to his friends. He forgets their names a second later, as he’s too focused on Adam’s warm weight squished next to him. (Though he does notice one girl look at him funny: he doesn’t know if she recognizes him or if she just thinks he’s rude for interrupting them.)

Adam turns back to him and says, “So you were saying I was amazing? You can elaborate if you want.”

Darren laughs, and Adam joins him before demanding, “No, really, tell me about yourself. Where are you from? What’s your sign?”

Darren fidgets and laughs softly. “Um, I’m from Australia originally, but I’m currently living in London. I’m a Taurus and, uh, I like music and dogs?”

Adam raises his eyebrows. “London? That’s cool. What are you here for?”

“Work,” Darren says, and then quickly asks, “What do you do?” he waves his hand, encompassing the room, “Besides sing at cabarets.”

“I do theater. I’m an understudy in Wicked.” Adam says this with a smile, but also with a noticeable lack of enthusiasm.

“Yeah? That’s awesome. I’ve always wanted to do theater, but I just never had the time I guess.”

Darren realizes his mistake two seconds too late as Adam asks, “Oh, you sing?”

“Um, yeah, uh, I sing.” Darren probably should tell Adam the whole truth, but he doesn’t want Adam to judge him on any preconceived notions. Then again, it’s not really easy to nonchalantly mention you were once in a famous band in the middle of a conversation. At least not without looking like a tool.

When Darren doesn’t elaborate Adam laughs. “Okaaay,” Adam drawls, but he changes the subject nonetheless. They talk about general stuff: movies, books, places they have been. Adam’s obviously a people person, charming and quick-witted. Darren hasn’t met someone he clicked with so fast in ages, and he finds himself having a good time.

Darren only realizes he’s been monopolizing all of Adam’s attention, and probably flirting, by the way Adam’s friend winks at him as he says goodbye to them.

Darren looks around and sees that they’re the only ones left at the table and laughs self-consciously. “Ah, I should probably let you go.”

Adam stares at him for a second, then states, “Come home with me.”

“Okay.” He isn’t sure who’s more surprised by his answer, Adam or himself.

“Awesome,” Adam replies, grinning.

They walk out to the parking lot together and agree that Darren will follow Adam home so they don‘t have to worry about their cars. Darren drives on autopilot, not wanting to think this through even for a second, lest he come to his senses and drive back to his hotel room. Alone.

He doesn’t. He parks beside Adam and follows him to the door of his apartment. Darren glances around once they’re inside; it’s small, but nice and obviously well lived in.

Adam watches him, waiting until Darren looks at back him, “It’s small, but hey, it’s home.”

A smile spreads across his face, dear lord, the man is adorable. “I like it.”

Darren follows him to the kitchen and Adam hands him a bottle of water out of the fridge, grabbing one for himself as well. He takes a drink and says, “You know, on the way here I realized that I really know nothing about you.” Adam wipes his mouth with the back of his hand. “We talked for more than an hour, and yet, nothing.” He narrows his eyes and gives Darren a suspicious look, “You’re not going to kill me are you?”

Darren throws his head back in a laugh. “No, no, I wasn’t planning on it.”

“No? What were you planning on, then?”

Darren shakes his head. “Honestly? I have no idea.”

Adam puts his water down and takes Darren‘s unopened bottle from him, placing it on the countertop with his own. He crowds him against the kitchen counter and kisses him. It’s not soft like he was expecting; it’s hard and fast, and Adam’s got a hand on his neck as he kisses him within an inch of his life.

They’re breathing hard as they break a part and Adam raises an eyebrow. “None?”

It takes Darren a minute to figure out what Adam’s talking about. His brain feels like mush. “Uh, all right, I might have a few ideas.” Darren grins, and kisses him. This time he takes control of the kiss, and Adam fights him for it, and it’s hotter than it has any right to be.

Adam pulls back too soon, and after taking a deep breath asks, “Seriously, you’re not, like, hiding three kids and a wife in the suburbs, right?” When Darren just groans in frustration, Adam continues, “Sorry. It’s just that you’re being all mysterious! And foreign! You can’t blame me for being curious.”

Darren sighs and decides what the fuck, it doesn’t really matter. “Do you have a Savage Garden CD?”

Adam gives him a strange look and says slowly, “Sure, if that’s what you’re in the mood for.” He leaves the room before Darren can process that, and when he does he all but runs after him.

“Oh my god, not to have sex to!” Darren winces because that came out a little too appalled and shrill. “I mean, I just wanted to show you something.” Darren sees Adam crouched down in front of about a billion CD’s encased along a wall, muttering to himself. He’s not even listening to him.

“Would that be in the S’s or G’s... ugh, fuck if I know. I tell you, never alphabetize while drunk – it never ends well.” Adam finally grabs a CD. “Ah, found one. Affirmation, that okay?”

Adam glances up at him and does a double take before staring back down at the CD cover. “Huh.”

Awkward silence reigns until Adam questions dryly, “Is it just me, or does this look a lot like you?”

Darren gives him a small smile. “A younger, more airbrushed version of me. Yeah.”

Adam doesn’t even crack a smile as he flips the CD over. “Darren Hayes, huh? Wow, you really do sing.” Adam finally looks up at him and breaks into a grin. “Oh my god, this is amazing. You're amazing.” Adam starts looking a little flustered and his hand waves around excitedly. “I love your voice. I listened to this all the time when it first came out!”

Adam waves the CD and then looks like he’s going to open it, so Darren snags it out of his hands. As amused and pleased as he is at Adam’s excitement, he really doesn’t want to risk Adam actually trying to play it.

Adam just keeps talking, though. “I think I have some of your new stuff on my computer, too. Shit, what’s that one about sex called? I love that one.” He goes to move, presumably to find his computer, but Darren stops him by grabbing his shoulders.

“Wow, I’m extremely flattered; but no playing of my music unless we’re just going to, like, bake cookies all night.”

Adam turns sheepish and says, “Sorry, living here I never get star stuck, but I usually don’t bring them home either. So, you know...” Adam gestures between them and Darren totally gets it.

“Don’t worry about it. You should have seen me trying to talk to Britney Spears. I’m pretty sure she almost had me tackled by her security guards.”

Adam snorts, “You know, in hindsight, I don‘t know how I didn‘t know who you were. I‘m a horrible fan.”

Darren tosses the CD down on the couch and grabs Adam’s hands. “I’m glad you didn’t.”

“Why’s that?”

Darren shakes his head. “Because I probably wouldn’t be here. It’s just, I like to be judged on who I am, not on who people think I am, you know? ...Wow, that sounds corny as hell.”

Adam nods sagely, “No, I get that.” He waits a beat before wiggling his eyebrows lewdly. “So, want to see my bedroom?”

Darren laughs. “Smooth, man, smooth.”

Adam leads the way with a swish of his hips, saying lightly, “I try.”

Adam’s bed is big and Darren only gets a glimpse of the zebra patterned comforter before he’s being pushed down onto it. It confirms what he’s suspected, and he laughs softly up at Adam. “I take it you’re the one used to being in charge?”

Adam climbs on top of him, straddling Darren’s hips, and answers, “I usually top, yes.”

Darren grabs hold of Adam’s waist and pulls him down until they‘re reclined, Darren resting his weight on his elbows. “What a coincidence, me too,” Darren says against Adam’s mouth before kissing him hard, teeth clacking as he licks into his mouth. Adam starts wiggling until their dicks are lined up, and he thrusts down. They moan in unison and Darren pulls back enough to bite down on Adam’s soft bottom lip.

Adam breaks a part with a gasp and looks indecisive for all of one moment before groaning, “Okay, you can fuck me.”

Darren wasn’t expecting that; in fact he, was ready to bend over for Adam right now, but it’s an offer he can’t pass up. Before thinking it through he says, “We could switch? I go first and then you could fuck me later. I mean, if you have time?”

Adam grinds down against him unconsciously. “I have time,” he sighs, voice slightly husky, and then indignantly, “Hey, why do you get to go first?”

Darren grins and sits up, making Adam fall backwards a little, and he slides a hand over Adam’s erection through his jeans. Darren grips it and squeezes once, twice, and then harder a third time until a moan bubbles up out of Adam’s throat. “Because I’m older than you.” Darren breathes against Adam’s neck, licking softly, before growling, “And you – I don’t know if you know this – you’ve got a baseball bat in your jeans.”

Adam’s laugh is cut short as Darren squeezes him again and then rubs him through his pants once more before starting to unbutton them. Adam helps him with the zipper and then says, “But I know how to use it, seriously, I always get a hole in one or...” Adam’s nose scrunches up, “What do you call it when you score in baseball?”

Darren laughs while pulling down Adam’s jeans. “Home runs?” He gets them to Adam’s thigh, but Adam has to get off him to pull them the rest of the way off.

“Yes!” Adam’s voice comes muffled from pulling his shirt over his head, and he drops it to the floor. “I always get a home run.” Darren stares at him in nothing but boxer briefs and believes him.

Holy cow, Darren believes him. Adam lets him stare, and Darren takes him in. Adam’s taller than he thought, miles of long legs and thighs that just beg for him to sink his teeth into them. Darren’s eyes trail up him to that bit of softness in his stomach, to his broad chest and shoulders, to everything covered in a dusting of freckles. Darren meets Adam’s gaze and knows his appreciation must be obvious, because Adam’s breath kind of hitches.

Darren smirks and hopes it’s sexy and not stupid looking. He makes a twirling motion with his hand encouraging Adam to turn around, and with a saucy grin Adam complies.

Darren’s eyes are instantly drawn to his ass and thighs as he tries not to swallow his own tongue. “Take them off,” Darren directs, and it comes out way hoarser than he expected.

Adam throws him a look over his shoulder but does as he‘s told. Darren has to clear his throat that’s suddenly gone dry as Adam slowly slides his briefs down, bending forward slightly to step out of them. Darren follows the curve of his spine to the round jut of his ass and has to refrain himself from grabbing him and biting at the dip where his ass meets his thighs. If he whimpers a little, he’s fairly confident that Adam didn’t hear him.

Before Adam can turn back around, Darren’s on him, pulling him to his chest and whispering against the back of his ear, “Fuck you’re gorgeous.” Adam leans back into him on an exhale, and he’s a couple inches taller than Darren, so he slouches a little. Darren kisses behind his ear. “And tall,” Darren says, and he feels Adam’s rumbled laugh more than he hears it.

Darren likes the contrast of feeling Adam’s naked body against his own clothed one, but he decides that he would like it better if he was naked too. He spins them around until Adam is facing the bed and tells him, “Lay down on your stomach,” quickly adding, “Please?”

Adam looks back at him with a hint of smirk and says, “Since you asked so nicely.” Adam crawls up the bed to lay down and Darren quickly starts shedding his clothes. He remembers to ask as he’s stepping out of his slacks–

“Where’s your stuff?”

Adam points to drawer to the left of the bed and Darren goes over to rummage in it until he finds what he needs: lube, condoms, and a small bottle of lotion. He puts the stuff beside a fidgeting Adam, and wearing only his briefs crawls up the bed until he’s straddling Adam’s ass. He’s soft and pale and Darren doesn’t feel bad about gripping his hips until his fingertips leave smears of red behind.

Adam seems a little restless under him and Darren soothes him by running a hand down his spine and then reaching for the bottle of lotion. He uncaps it and asks, “Is this okay?” He waves the bottle down at Adam, who looks surprised, but says yes.

Darren warms the lotion in his hands before setting them on Adam’s back and starting to massage, kneading muscle and warm skin beneath his palms. Adam melts and turns boneless for him, moaning loudly whenever Darren hits a particularly tight spot.

Darren feels zen about it, lost to the feel of soft skin and the hard tension of the knots in Adam’s muscles that he gradually loosens up. He becomes fully aware again when Adam’s moans start becoming louder and he starts grinding against the mattress, jerking roughly back into Darren as he does so.

Darren laughs and says, “Alright, alright.” He leans all the way forward and kisses the back of Adam’s neck. “I was just trying to relax you.” He trails bites and licks over Adam’s shoulder and asks, “How do you want me?”

Adam lifts his head and kisses him fast, all teeth and tongue, before saying thickly, “Like this.”

Adam lifts up onto his hands and Darren gets it, quickly sliding off him, as Adam gets on his knees. Darren puts a hand on one of his thighs until Adam spreads his legs enough for Darren to get between them. He doesn’t waste time slicking up his fingers with lube and circling Adam’s hole, before dipping his thumb inside.

Adam twitches but doesn’t say anything; Darren asks, “You good?”

“Yeah, but tonight would be good.” Adam looks back at him and a soft smile belies his words, “Come on, I thought you wanted to fuck me.”

Darren answers by pushing a finger into him and Adam obviously hasn’t done this in a while, because he’s immediately engulfed in tight, tight heat. Darren slowly stretches him and somehow stops himself from just rubbing one out on Adam’s ass. It’s a near thing.

As Darren adds a second finger Adam can’t seem to keep still, tensing and relaxing in turns, head hanging low and breath coming heavy. Darren runs his other hand up Adam’s freckled back and into his hair, tugging lightly. He slips a third finger in and goes straight for Adam’s prostate, and from Adam’s guttural moan, he knows he’s found it. He grins into Adam’s shoulder and rubs at the spot relentlessly until Adam’s shaking and tensing around him.

Adam’s arms go out beneath him and Darren takes that as all the invitation he needs. He hurries out of his briefs and rolls on a condom in a haze of arousal, setting himself up behind Adam before he knows it. Adam’s still collapsed, head resting on his arms. He moves to get back up, but Darren pushes on his back, keeping him prone.

Adam’s ass is up in the air and his back is perfectly curved as Darren slides into him in one smooth move. Darren hears a muffled, “Fuck,” and pauses, enjoying the tightness around his dick, when Adam pushes back hard, “No, fuck. Move, motherfuck.”

Darren huffs out a laugh and moves, fucking into Adam just like he wants to: hard and fast. Adam finally talks, variations of fucks and oh gods, all muffled by his arms. It winds Darren up, heat shooting through him, and he has to grab Adam around the waist and pull him up, skin against skin as Adam is slammed against his sweaty chest. Adam’s louder now and Darren keeps thrusting hard, jerking them across the bed. Darren’s about to come his brains out and slides his hand down until it’s on Adam’s dick. Adam groans and jerks into Darren’s hand, coming hard, and soaking his hand.

Darren squeezes his eyes shut and thrusts harder as Adam tightens around him. His own orgasm tears through him and he finds nirvana as every nerve ending sings in pleasure. He relaxes completely, collapsing onto the warm body beneath him.

Darren’s heart rate slowly starts to come down and he realizes he’s smothering Adam into the mattress. He’s gross and sticky and his arm is crushed under Adam. He’s also still in Adam, but he really doesn’t plan on moving for at least ten years.

Adam finally moves underneath him and Darren slips out, making them both groan. Adam rolls onto his side and looks at him under heavy-hooded eyes as Darren lays beside him. Adam reaches down and pulls the condom off him, ties it, and throws it off the side of the bed into what Darren hopes is a rubbish bin. Adam finishes the futile clean up with tissues from the night stand, and then snuggles up to him.

Darren runs a hand though his sweaty hair. “Well, did I hit a home run?”

Adam smiles languidly at him. “Oh, yeah.” He closes his eyes, “But I caught the ball.”

Darren laughs and pulls the end of the blanket that Adam’s hogging over himself. “That doesn’t even makes sense.”

“Whatever, stupid sports metaphors,” Adam slurs sleepily.

“Uh, huh.” Darren watches him and knows he’s asleep as his breathing goes slow and deep. Darren closes his eyes and falls into a deep sleep for the first time in a long while.

Part 2

Let it in that ray of light, Master Post

2011-02-02T22:37:46Z

Title: Let it in that ray of light
Author: shadowfaxy
Artist: taxcha
Type: romance, ghost au
Word Count: 17,000
Rating: NC-17
Characters/Pairings: Adam/Tommy
Warnings: violence, strong language,
Summary: Tommy Ratliff owns a pawn shop and accidentally ends up putting on a cursed locket. That’s also haunted by a ghost. Luckily, he meets Adam Lambert, a psychic medium, who agrees to help. But can they discover the mysterious past of the locket before Tommy loses his life?

Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four
Link to art master post: Here

A/N: So I had a completely different story planned for BB but it wouldn’t come together right (although, one day I plan to finish that fucker) and so I started this one just for fun. It’s purely self-indulgent but I decided that I liked it anyway, lol. So have a silly ghost au.

Thanks: I want to thank the mods at lambliffbigbang for the amazing job they did! And to my awesome beta a_dreamwithin who was so helpful and told me my fic didn’t suck ;) Thank You! Also go tell taxcha how gorgeous her artwork is, seriously, the locket she made was just perfect. And also to anyone who listened to me whine about this story for the last month you have my eternal gratitude.

Fic: Let it in that ray of light, 4/4

2011-02-02T03:57:51Z

They plan and get ready the next day so they can summon the ghosts that night. They decide to use the store as the place to summon them, not just because it was big enough and has hard wood floors, but because Adam thought it was also a full circle thing. This is where it all started.

Adam goes shopping for what they will need and calls Monte to house sit Tommy for him. More for his sake than for Tommy’s. Adam just doesn’t want him to be alone right now.

Luckily, Tommy and Monte take a liking to each other and Adam slips out to go get some chalk, salt and some candles. That part’s easy enough, now he just has to find something that belonged to Caroline and Leo.

So he sneakily looks up Emily’s address and stops by, and because of Adam’s awesome people skills, he gets invited in for coffee.

He leaves an hour later having eaten way too many cookies and with a gold pocket watch tucked into his pocket. He’d totally been a thief in a past life.

Tommy’s skeptical that the pocket watch was Leo’s until he turns it over and sees the LWT carved into the back.

“Okay, what about Caroline? What about something of her's?” Tommy asks him and he looks horrible, pale and drawn, and sitting snuggled into a blanket on the couch.

“There was nothing. I looked and even asked but Emily said they sold everything a long time ago.” They start thinking of alternatives, like summoning her over her grave, when Isabelle drifts in and points at Tommy.

“You have something of Caroline’s, you dull-witted chimps.”

They both look down at the locket and then back up at each other. Tommy’s shoulders start shaking and then they are laughing and rolling into each other on the couch.

“We are so stupid!” Adam cries and then starts giggling again when Monte comes in from the kitchen with a plate full of sandwiches.

“Well, I knew that but why are we laughing?” Monte offers them a sandwich and Adam makes Tommy take one.

“Nothing,” says Adam, finally getting under control, “Just stupidity nerves.”

Tommy grins at him and eats his sandwich.

Adam and Monte start going over the details, making sure they have everything planned out the best they can. Tommy tunes them out, finding it hard to concentrate, sit up and eat a sandwich at the same time. Tommy’s been sick, really sick, before and this is about a hundred times worse. He aches all over and just wants to crawl into bed and sleep. Only he’s too terrified he’ll never wake up again if he does and it’s beginning to be an effort not to break down. Instead, he clings to Adam like a drowning man with a life preserver and tries not to think about how apt that analogy really is.

Tommy’s brought back to the conversation when Adam says to Monte, “Just gently touch it with a finger.”

Tommy looks up and sees Monte hovering in front of him. He gives Tommy a smile. “Adam wants me to touch the locket?”

“Oh,” Tommy says and moves his shirt out of the way. Monte places his index finger over the blue jewel and touches it lightly.

Monte doesn’t pull back. He just looks over to Adam and says, “It’s weirdly warm.” He takes his hand away and wipes it on his pants. “And you’re right. It feels gross.”

Adam exchanges a look with Tommy. “So it didn’t feel hot to you? Like burning hot?” Adam asks Monte.

Monte gives him a funny look. “No, just warm. Why?”

Adam’s silent for a while before saying, “No reason,” and then starts a conversation with Monte about how unnatural the locket feels to them. Tommy looks at Adam curiously before tuning out of the conversation again and concentrates on staying awake.

After Monte takes the dishes back to the kitchen Adam pulls Tommy closer to his side and wraps his arms around him. “Hey, you okay?”

Tommy settles back against him with a contented sigh. “Yeah, just nervous, I guess.” He grabs Adam’s hand and holds it against his chest. After a minute he decides to air his concerns he’s had since Monte got here. “Adam, are you sure about this? Monte seems to be worried about you.” Tommy turns around to face him. “It’s not going to hurt you is it?”

Adam doesn’t answer and Tommy starts to get really worried when Adam finally says, “No, it shouldn’t hurt me.”

Tommy’s not reassured at all. “Then why is Monte about to have kittens he’s so worried? Adam, if something happens to you I won’t–” Tommy stops abruptly. He wants to sound angry but doesn’t have the energy so it comes out weak and vaguely pleading. “Adam, just don’t do anything stupid. It’s not worth it.”

Adam pulls him back against him again so they’re not facing each other. Tommy goes willingly as Adam cuddles him to his chest but hears the tight-laced anger in his words as he says against his ear, “You mean you’re not worth it? How about you let me decide what you’re worth to me? I think that’s best for everyone involved, yes?”

Tommy doesn’t know what to say to that besides, “What about you? It goes both ways you know.”

Adam kisses him behind his ear and says, “Then it’s a good thing nothing bad is going to happen to either of us.”

“I’m going to hold you to that,” Tommy turns and nuzzles along his jaw and feels it when Adam smiles.

“I’m going to hold you to a lot of things,” Adam whispers against Tommy's mouth and then kisses the laughter out of his mouth.

Adam makes a big circle with chalk in the front room of Tommy’s pawn shop and then lines it with salt. “It’s to keep the ghosts in,” Adam tells Tommy, who’s leaning against the check-out counter. “I really don’t want to risk possession and this should keep them in.” Adam doesn’t miss Tommy’s head tilt at should.

Monte comes over with the candles and puts them on the circle, one for each direction.

Adam looks at Tommy. “Ready?”

Tommy comes to stand beside Adam and with what looks like more energy than he has says forcefully, “Hell, yeah. I want this thing off.”

Adam grins at him and then Monte’s done lighting the candles and Adam puts a hand over Caroline’s locket on Tommy’s chest. It burns him and it takes everything he has not to pull away. He grimaces in pain and starts to summon Caroline.

“I call on the spirit Caroline Turner,” Adam’s voice rings out and he only feels a little stupid. He jerks his hand away form the locket when the pain gets too much to handle. “Caroline, can you come here, please.”

Adam says it a few more times and he’s starting to feel really stupid when Monte hits him on the back of the head. “You’re a medium, dumbass. Use your gift.”

Adam’s confused for a minute and then really feels like a dumbass. It’s a miracle he can dress himself in the morning with this much stupidity running through him. “Oh.”

Monte backs away again with an amused look and Adam closes his eyes. He looks around in the darkness for that thing, that otherness, that is always inside him. He finds it easily, just humming in the background, and pulls until it opens and floods through him in a rush. Adam sucks in a breath and it feels like he’s drowning in cold water and he pushes, calling out, “Caroline? Caroline Turner, please come here.”

Adam knows it worked the moment he says her name and he feels an answering pull. He opens his eyes and sees her standing in the circle, looking confused.

Adam looks at Tommy, who’s pale and breathing raggedly, and grabs Tommy’s hand in his own burnt and stinging one. He squeeze reassuringly and turns back to Caroline.

“Caroline, we need your help.” Adam starts and her eyes snap to his. She looks younger than he thought she would be. Dark hair around a heart-shaped face and she doesn’t look evil at all, she looks scared. Her eyes dart to the locket on Tommy and she visibly flinches.

“The locket,” she whispers.

“Caroline, how do we remove the locket? Tell us how to reverse the curse.” Adam’s starting to get tired already. It feels like she’s draining him, pulling all that cold water energy out of him.

“I can’t,” she whispers again. “I’m sorry, I can’t.” She still looks scared.

“Why?” Adam asks and then because there’s not much time says, “Isabelle, tell her the deal.”

Isabelle appears beside him and he’s never seen such angry sadness. “You killed me,” she tells an almost crying Caroline. “You killed me and you’re about to kill someone else if you don’t tell them how to stop it.”

Caroline does start crying then and Adam really doesn‘t care. “Tell us. Or I’ll summon Leo and tell him what you did.”

“I can’t,” Caroline wails, ‘It will release her too!” She stops crying and looks at Isabelle. “You can’t have him. You can’t.”

“Even in death you don’t want me to have him?” Isabelle sneers, “Caroline, let it go. You already won.”

Adam feels like he’s about to pass out, but fucks it, and grabs a hold of the watch in his pocket and calls, “Leo! Leo Turner, come here.” He feels another pull and it almost sends him to his knees if it wasn’t for Tommy’s shaking hand still holding his.

He hears a male voice, “Isabelle?” then, “Caroline? What’s going on?” He hears Isabelle start to explain from behind a haze and then he hears Caroline cry out again. Tommy brings him back to himself with a jerk and a worried, “Adam!”

Adam nods and turns back to the scene it front of him and it’s like a fucking ghost soap opera. Days of Our AfterLives. All My Dead Children. Adam snickers to himself and decides it’s time to interrupt. “Tell me how to save him.” Adam gets their attention and adds, “Or I swear I will make your afterlife hell, Caroline. Don’t fuck with me. Just tell me.”

Caroline looks at a completely wrecked looking Leo and says in a small voice, ”You already did,” and then adds, “You’ll need a knife.” She stares intently at Adam, “And someone who loves him.”

Luckily, Adam has both. He bends down and rummages in his bag of supplies and pulls out a pocket knife he stowed in there. He’s a fucking boy scout, is what he is.

He turns back to Caroline, and has to grab onto Tommy to stop himself from falling. They both falter under their combined weight but stay standing. Hurry, they need to hurry. “Okay, now what.”

“Cut yourself and smear the blood on the locket. Then repeat after me.” Caroline sounds shaky and Adam turns to Tommy quickly, vision blurring, and he vehemently fights it off.

Tommy gets out a protested, “Adam,” but he’s already slicing into his hand and then grabbing onto the locket, his blood slipping wetly as the blue jewel sears into his cut palm. Adam can’t help but let out a cry of pain and instinctively tries to yank his hand back but it won’t budge. His hand is stuck to the burning locket and it feels like it’s on fire. Adam’s eyes start to water from the pain of it, but with a panicked yell from Tommy he pulls it together enough to listen to Caroline.

Caroline starts saying something in another language. Latin? Romanian? Adam doesn’t know but repeats what she says as slowly as he dares and prays he doesn’t fuck it up.

Tommy’s looking at him wide-eyed as Adam finishes repeating Caroline. “A permite lui soul remain. A permite pe el energie.”

Adam doesn’t know if it worked but then feels the locket unhook and fall into his hand. His hand feels like it was dipped in acid but he stares down at the locket, cold and nonthreatening now, and says, “You may go. Leave in peace.” Then blacks out before he hits the floor.

~~~~~

Adam wakes up hungover and with an intense stinging pain in his right hand. He lifts his hand and finds it covered in some kind of ointment and it looks disgusting, red and slightly blistered. He tries to sit up, confused, and sees Tommy sleeping in a chair beside him and he remembers exactly what happened. He realizes he is on an old couch in one of the shop’s back rooms and weighted down by a bunch of pillows and blankets. He’s weak and shaky and it feels like he slept for a week. Or at least that’s what his mouth tastes likes. Adam grimaces and tries to sit up again to no avail. That’s when he notices Isabelle standing in the doorway.

“Hey, what are you still doing here?” Adam’s voice is a croak and he clears it uselessly.

“I just wanted to say thank you. You freed me.” And she smiles at him, a real genuine smile and Adam can’t help but return it.

“You’re welcome. Even if I had ulterior motives for doing it,” Adam says with a look to the scrunched, sleeping Tommy.

“I don’t mind.” Isabelle actually shrugs at him. Then also looking at Tommy she says, “Take care of him. He’s kind of hopeless, isn’t he?”

“Yes,” Adam says with a find smile, “I will.” And with a last happy look at Tommy she vanishes. Adam knows she’s gone for good.

Adam’s still smiling when he notices Tommy’s looking at him. “Hey, you okay?”

“Shouldn’t I be asking you that question?” Tommy sits up and eyes him. “How do you feel?” he finally asks.

“Hungover,” Adam says truthfully. “How long was I out?”

“About sixteen hours.” Tommy looks expressionless.

“Really? Damn, no wonder I feel so bad.” He does feel like he got run over by a space ship and rode it to Mars.

Tommy doesn’t look amused. “You almost died. Your heart stopped.”

“It did?” Adam doesn’t remember this. He would totally remember this.

“Monte brought you back. I freaked out an almost called an ambulance. Monte said it wouldn’t help and we just had to wait. Then he babbled to me about energy or the force or whatever, and you basically overused your gift. Way overused.” Tommy says all this stoically, no emotion whatsoever.

“Huh.” Adam has no idea what to say to that.

Tommy walks toward him and kneels down to his level. “If you ever do something that stupid again I will fucking end you. If you ever scare me like that again I will rip off your arms and beat you senseless with them. And then dump your useless body in a river. Got it?”

The tightly controlled rage and emotion in Tommy’s voice breaks and Adam looks down. He swallows hard and says, “Got it.”

“All right.” Tommy softens and runs a hand over Adam’s jaw. “Thank you for saving my life.”

“You’re welcome.” Adam says softly.

Adam sits up with Tommy’s help and then Tommy leaves and comes back with pills and a glass of water in his hands. He helps Adam take them and asks quietly, “How’s your hand?”

“Hurts like a bitch,” Adam says with a frown.

Tommy looks pained and incredibly guilty. “I’m so sorry, Adam. I had no idea you would have to do that,” Tommy says and then won’t look him in the eye.

“Hey, no,” Adam says and tries to get Tommy to look at him. “Don’t do that. Look at me.” Tommy finally does and Adam tells him softly, “The locket burned me for a reason, you know.”

Tommy looks surprised. “What? What do you mean?”

“It knew I could break the curse. So it tried to keep me away.” Adam stares fixedly at Tommy. “Something Caroline hated and feared in Leo.”

Tommy just looks at Adam baffled until comprehension crosses his face and he says in a shaky voice, “His love for Isabelle.”

Adam smiles and nods his head. “Yeah.”

“Y-you,” Tommy says in a strangled voice, unable to finish. “You really, I,” Tommy stops again and then blurts out, “But how could it know?”

Adam shrugs, “Caroline put her will and emotions into the curse. It turned into an extension of her. An she was terrified of Leo’s feelings for Isabelle. So the locket feared love.”

Tommy looks dazed and says, “Oh.” And then like he can’t hold it in anymore. “You really love me? Like really?”

Adam takes Tommy’s chin in his uninjured hand and kisses him on the mouth. He pulls back and lifts a brow. “What do you think?”

A grin spreads slowly across Tommy’s face and he says impishly, “Yeah, you totally love me.”

Adam throws his head back and laughs. “I don’t know why.” He grins at Tommy until he sees the the locket lying on a table by the couch. He suppresses a shudder. “I wonder what will happen to them. Caroline and Leo, I mean.”

Tommy follows his gaze to the locket and shakes his head. “They vanished when you told them to.” Tommy looks back at Adam. “It’s sad though. I feel sorry for Caroline. She really did love him in her own fucked up way.”

Adam looks at Tommy in surprise. “Love? No, she wanted Leo for herself. For her own selfish reasons. She didn’t even care about what he wanted. That’s not love. That’s ownership.”

“Maybe,” Tommy looks deep in thought. “But being in love doesn’t make a person perfect. Or stop someone from being horribly wrong or hurtful. If anything it makes it worse. The stakes so incredibly high to get it right. And the risk of having it all or losing it all placed firmly in your own hands. In the choices you make.”

Adam turns over what Tommy said in his mind and stupidly comes up with Shakespeare or his movie anyway. “So what... ‘come ruin or rapture?’”

Tommy smiles and says, “Something like that.”

“And they say I’m a melodramatic sap,” Adam teases him. “You do realize Caroline murdered someone and almost killed you, right?”

“I didn’t say she was right or, you know, not evil,” Tommy says, laughing at Adam. “Just that I feel sorry for her. She really was kind of pathetic.”

Adam hums at him. “Tommy, if this is some weird way of saying you love me, too, it’s not coming out very clear.” Adam glares at him. “Want to try again?”

Tommy beams at him. “You’re the psychic. You tell me.”

Adam just grins at him.

Tommy grins back and takes his hand. “Now, come on, I want to take you home.”

six months later...

Dating a psychic medium has its perks. For example, Adam is an excellent judge of character, he knows all the places to be or not to be, is a warning system for danger, (like that time he stopped Tommy from almost eating a bee that was hidden in his Cobb salad) and he has a knack for finding lost things. (especially Tommy’s car keys, although, that might just be because he knows Tommy has a tendency to lose them)

It also has its downsides. Like right now. Adam is naked and spread out across the bed for Tommy to feast is eyes and mouth on. Tommy’s resting between Adam’s thighs and has been thoroughly enjoying making Adam pant and moan down at him. Getting Adam to lose control has quickly become his favorite pastime. The fact that it wasn’t easy made it all the better. So it’s quite understandable for Tommy to be disgruntled when, licking and biting up Adam’s inner thigh, Adam goes tense and quiet above him.

Tommy looks up and follows Adam’s irritated head shake to the corner of the room.

“God dammit, who is it now? Religious old lady or creepy perverted guy?” Tommy asks while Adam makes an abbreviated shooing motion with his hand.

Adam makes a frustrated sound. “Religious old lady,” he tells him reluctantly.

“Well, make her go away like you did the last time.” Tommy’s beginning to suspect being a medium is harder than he had first thought as a lot of ghosts don’t like being told what to do.

“I don’t want to repent again! I like gay sex!” Adam wails sullenly down at him and Tommy tries not to laugh.

“Come on, it was only twenty Hail Mary's.” Tommy tries to keep the amusement out of his voice but the dirty look Adam throws him tells him he failed. “Then tell her you can’t repent gay sex if you haven’t finished said gay sex.”

Adam keeps glaring down at him and Tommy says, “Hey, I’m on a hour lunch break and have a giant shipment of drums coming in later. And as you are my lunch today I would like to go back to eating it, yes?”

Adam’s eyes go a little dark and he mutters something Tommy can’t hear before relying what he said to the ghost. “Twenty,” Adam says to the corner and then, “Twenty-five or I’ll find your grave and pee on it.”

Tommy stifles a laugh in Adam’s thigh and knows it worked when Adam relaxes beneath him. Adam nudges him with a hand on his head. “Now get back to work.” Tommy gladly obliges.

When Tommy’s exhausted and almost passed out on top of Adam he thinks of something. “What if I got a cat?”

Adam’s answer comes muffle and almost incoherent, “Why?”

Tommy lifts head. “I thought ghosts were scared of cats?”

Adam shakes beneath him in laughter. “No, if anything they like cats better than dogs.”

Tommy finally rolls off him and asks, “Why’s that?”

“Because cats don’t bark at them.” Adam opens his eyes and smiles at him.

“Then maybe we should get a dog?” Tommy asks hopefully. Dogs are awesome and they should totally have one.

“We?” Adam looks over at him and Tommy suddenly becomes very engrossed in the comforter in front of him.

“Yeah, I mean, we could go to the shelter and pick one out,” Tommy glances quickly up at Adam then back down again. “Then we could bring it home and then, um, you could not leave.?”

There is a minute of silence and then Tommy feels a hand on his chin lifting it up and Adam’s smiling at him. “Tommy, are you asking me to move in with you?”

“Maybe?” Tommy eyes dart down again and Adam jerks his chin up. “Yes?” Tommy sounds hesitant even to his own ears and says again more firmly, “Yes.”

“I would love to.” Adam sounds ecstatic and it makes Tommy grin in return.

“Can we get a dog too?” Tommy asks and falls forward and presses his mouth to Adam’s, who huffs out a laugh.

“Yeah, we can get a dog too.” Adam pulls him back in for another kiss and Tommy loses time.

Adam does move in with him and they do get a dog. And a cat. Sadly, neither of them get rid of their ghost problem. Adam’s looking into alternative methods in between bouts of Hail Mary’s. Tommy valiantly tries to help and doesn’t laugh at him. At least not too much.

The End

Fic: Let it in that ray of light, 3/4

2011-02-02T01:53:52Z

They don’t have sex that night. Tommy’s too exhausted and he’s only mildly embarrassed about that. Hey, apparently, slowing getting your soul sucked out is tiring. Who knew?

Tommy makes Adam cuddle with him though. Well, make is a strong word. He just has to point out the bed and Adam wraps around him, snuggling him against his chest. And even though they both are fully clothed it feels so good the last thing Tommy wants to do is sleep. But he does sleep and if he’s holding onto Adam’s hand when he does, well, he doesn’t think anyone would judge him.

Isabelle looks confused at a pretty dark haired girl. “Why? I don’t understand. Why would you do this?”

The dark haired girl looks at Isabelle up and down. She’s a ghost. “Because he’s mine. He’s always been mine. You could never understand him. Understand what people like you have done to us.”

Isabelle still looks confused, like she can’t understand the words being spoken to her, “But I love him. I would never hurt him.” She shakes her head and a tear spills down her face, “I thought you were my friend.”

The dark haired girl smiles at her. “This never would have ended well. I did you a favor.”

Isabelle looks down at her see-through hands and her world goes grey.

Tommy wakes up with a gasp and as soon as he tries to think of the dream it starts to slip away. Faint images of Isabelle and another girl filter through his mind. Tommy can’t remember their conversation and can only parse out Isabelle’s feelings of confusion. He turns over to see a still sleeping Adam and decides not to wake him. They already know someone cursed the locket and just need to figure out who. Did the girl curse Isabelle and if she did how? And why would she curse Isabelle? Tommy can’t figure it out, there are too many question and not enough answers. He lets out a breath of frustration.

“Tommy?” Adam’s squinting at him and sounds incredibly sleepy.

“Hey, go back to sleep,” Tommy whispers to him and then tries to wiggle under his arm.

Adam lifts his arm for him and Tommy can hear the smile in his voice, “Okay.”

Tommy snuggles Adam’s arm to his chest and closes his eyes. He falls asleep to the sound of Adam breathing.

~~~~~

They call back the woman the next morning as soon as they get to the shop. Adam has to go into work today or get fired but he tells Tommy he’ll wait so they can call her together. The woman, who’s name turns out to be Emily Hudson, is incredibly nice and polite, but ultimately not very helpful. Except, she does dawn some light on why nobody has noticed a soul sucking locket lying around.

Emily is in her fifties and a few years a go when her mother died her brother must have raided all her valuables she had kept in a safe. “I only saw the locket once or twice. Mom never let anyone touch it, though. Said it was special or something. I think it just reminded her of grandma, honestly. It was grandma’s originally and when she died it was one of the only things mom had left of her. It‘s a shame Simon got to it first. I remember it being quite beautiful.”

Tommy stops her suddenly. “It was your grandma’s? Originally? What was her name?”

If Emily finds that a strange question she doesn’t seem to notice. “Caroline. Yeah, Caroline Turner. Use to be Shields before she married my grandfather. I don’t know where she got the locket though.”

“No, no that’s fine. Thanks for all your help. Really, thank you.” Tommy hangs up a minute later and turns to tell Adam everything she had told him.

“So do you think her mother knew what it could do? What about her grandma?” Adam asks him and Tommy thinks about what exactly Emily said.

“I don’t know. It sounds fishy. Not letting anyone touch it and saying it‘s special?” Tommy mulls it over and then thinks of something. “When did Isabelle die? Could she have known Emily’s grandmother?”

Adam sighs and says, “I think it’s time to talk to Isabelle again.”

~~~~~

To their immense surprise Isabelle tells them. “I died in 1921.” Then to their utter shock she tells them what happened to her. They are sitting in Tommy’s kitchen later that day after Adam had gotten off work. They’d been eating Chinese take out when Isabelle wandered in and they had immediately started asking questions.

Now she’s staring out the window and looks less forlorn than usual. She almost seems normal. For a ghost. “I was twenty and completely in love with a man from the wrong side of town. He was poor. I was not.” She looks back at them. “His name was Leo Turner and his best friend was Caroline Shields. They were Roma.”

“Roma?” Tommy asks.

“Romani people.” When they still look perplexed she adds, “Gypsies. They were gypsies.”

Tommy nods at her and she continues, “We lived in different worlds but when I met him… there was just something about him. I fell for him and I know he loved me too. So when he asked me to marry him I said yes.”

She drifts over to where Tommy’s sitting and runs a finger over the blue jewel. “Then Caroline gave me this as an engagement present. Said it was for good luck and I shouldn’t ever take it off.” Isabelle laughs and it’s not a pretty sound. “I thought she was going to be my best friend too. I trusted her. But then I slowly got sick. Nobody could figure out what was wrong with me.”

Isabelle suddenly walks back to the window. “And when I died Caroline was there and the only one who could see me. She told me she was the one Leo really loved and that she wanted him all to herself. And she got him.”

Isabelle looked quite sad again. “The curse tied me to the locket. Then Caroline hid it away. As did her daughter. I can’t move on.”

The silence that fills the kitchen after that is deafening. Until, “well, fuck,” Adam exclaims and Tommy agrees that that about sums it up.

Tommy looks at her lone solitary figure, glimmering against the black of night behind her, and feels a pang of sorrow for her. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

Isabelle doesn’t turn around. “What difference does it make? There’s nothing you can do. You’re still going to die.” She finally turns to look at Tommy and says, desperately sad, “I’m sorry.” She vanishes and Tommy stares out the dark window. He’s slowly beginning to believe this is real. That there’s a possibility he might actually die and he doesn’t know what to feel. It seems like a dream, fake, indistinct, and he’s just waiting for someone to wake him up.

Tommy looks at Adam and he doesn’t know what the look on his face is but it makes Adam shake his head at him. “Isabelle didn’t know what was happening to her. We do. And we can find a way to stop it.”

“Adam,” Tommy says a little hopelessly, not even knowing what he’s going to say.

“Don’t,” Adam tells him. “Don’t argue with a psychic. They know things. And I know you’re not going to die.”

Tommy just takes Adam’s hand in his and holds it before looking out the window and seeing nothing but darkness.

~~~~~

The next two weeks are a study of frustrated panic. Most of the time they are frantically researching any way to get the locket off. The rest of the time they’re making out like teenagers and cuddling like old people. They don’t have sex and Tommy weirdly doesn’t mind. He knows him and Adam mean something, he just doesn’t know what. The whole impending doom thing, surprising enough, keeps distracting him.

Isabelle is no longer any help as she has no idea how Caroline cursed the locket. And as Caroline is long since dead, and her relatives know nothing either, they are at a dead end there. So they search for anything they can find on cursed objects. They find a bunch of gibberish (thank you, Internet) and a small collection of books from various public libraries and book stores. One used book store has some interesting books on spells and rituals that Tommy buys on sale. Even if they are useless like Adam says, in fact, Adam says everything they find is useless.

“I don’t see why we can’t try that one Ritual of Release or whatever. So what if we have to sacrifice a small bird! It’s worth a shot.” It’s was just one bird, Tommy thinks, and he eats chicken. He has no moral high ground here whatsoever and he does draw a line at birds. He would not kill a squirrel or worse a bunny. Tommy shudders.

“Because I’m not killing anything,” Adam tells him and sighs, sounding a little exasperated. “Tommy, spells and rituals are unpredictable at best and can be extremely dangerous. Especially, if you don’t know what you’re doing and we don’t know what we’re doing. It could cause more harm than good.”

Tommy slaps his book on the desk and asks, completely frustrated, “More harm than me dead?”

Adam sets his own book aside. “ Yes!“ He leans forward and gestures at Tommy‘s book. “Besides, we don’t know if the ritual would even work and then we killed a poor harmless bird for nothing. Or it does work, and by work, I mean it releases you of your head and the locket falls off by default.” Adam gives him a look.

Tommy swallows and says petulantly, “I like my head.”

Adam flashes him a small smile. “I’ve grown exceedingly fond of it myself.”

Tommy returns his smile but loses it quickly. “Adam, if this isn‘t going to help then what are we doing?”

Adam runs a frustrated hand through his hair. “I’m missing something, I know it, I just.” Adam stops and looks at Tommy intently. “I just have to figure it out. I’ll know it when I find it.”

And Tommy, Tommy, who’s up shit creek without a paddle, takes a leap of faith. Tommy believes him. He just hopes he doesn’t step in anything.

Adam must see it because he’s says with so much conviction it kind of makes Tommy want to cry, “I won’t let you die, Tommy.”

Tommy, in an effort to keep his dignity intact and not burst into tears like small child, says lightly, “Good, because if you do I will haunt your ass. Don’t think I won’t.”

Adam makes a face, a mix between amused and really fucking not. “That’s not funny.”

Tommy shrugs. It is what it is. “The truth. It hurts.” Tommy gets up and sits in Adam’s lap while he still can.

~~~~~

With less than a week left Tommy starts sleeping a lot. He feels tired all the time and just plain strung out. He also doesn’t tell Adam that he can feel the locket now. Before it was just a warm weight on his chest but now he has to fight the uncontrollable urge to rip it off every five seconds. It feels horrible and wrong and Tommy doesn’t know how Isabelle didn’t realize what was happening before she died.

They are sitting on Tommy’s bed because he can barely make it out of the apartment without passing out, and Adam’s reading something or other but Tommy is tired of reading and he wants Adam’s attention.

“Adam,” Tommy whines at him. So he’s being annoying, sue him, he’s allowed to be.

Adam just hums his assessment and turns a page in his book. “Adam.”

Adam looks up from his book and says, “Tommy.” Tommy pouts.

Adam totally rolls his eyes at him but puts the book down and tells him, “Come here.”

Tommy tries to act uninterested but obviously fails because Adam just rolls his eyes again and moves over to straddle Tommy’s lap. Tommy doesn’t complain.

Adam kisses him, slow and sweet, and Tommy’s just getting into it when Adam pulls back and says, “It’s driving me crazy, I'm missing something. I know it, I feel it, but… I just can’t grasp it.”

Tommy slaps his head back against the headboard and groans, “I’m going to kill you.”

Adam still has his scrunchy thinky face on and Tommy doesn’t think it’s cute. At all. Jesus, he’s so fucking screwed.

Adam’s absent-mindedly running a hand up and down his arm and Tommy stealthily tries to get a hand in Adam’s pants. He’s just about to give up (Adam’s pants are tight, goddamn) and just rip Adam’s zipper down when Isabelle wanders into the room.

“Oh, for fuck’s sake.” Tommy throws his hands up. He’s just wants to get laid, and apparently, man and supernatural forces are joining together to defeat him. What’s next, is a chupacabra going to come in and ask for directions? Tommy is not going to be cockblocked by a chupacabra. Or a ghost.

Tommy points at Isabelle and says, “You. Ghost. Get out.”

“Tommy, don’t be rude. She has a name and feelings, and just because she’s a ghos–” Tommy can see the light bulb flash on above Adam’s head. “Oh, oh… Fuck, I’m so stupid. It’s been right in front of me this whole time.” Adam leans down and pecks Tommy on the mouth before swinging off his lap.

“I just got to check with someone.” Adam grabs his messenger bag and all but runs out the door calling over his shoulder, “Just don’t go anywhere!”

Tommy hears the front door slam and realizes the fucker just left him hanging with a hard on and a ghost for company.

“He’s right, you know. I do have feelings,” Isabelle tells him and vanishes.

Tommy hates his life.

Adam only has a couple of friends, besides his family, who know he‘s a medium. He told the first two because he trusts them, but the third, well, the third is a hippy psychic that knew it from the first moment they met.

Monte swings the door open and takes one look at Adam before saying, “I’ll make some tea.”

Adam tells him everything (minus the fact that he wants to nail Tommy through the floor although Monte seems to have inferred that part anyway) and then tells him his plan.

“I want to summon her. Caroline, I mean, she can tell us how to reverse the curse and if she doesn’t, well then, we’ll threaten to summon Leo and tell him that his lovely wife is a murderer.” Adam knows this will work, he just needs a confirmation.

“Adam, you know it takes a very powerful medium to summon a ghost,” Monte tells him and he looks concerned. “And that’s just one ghost, let alone two.”

“I can do it,” Adam says and means it. “What other choice do I have?”

Monte sighs at him, “It’s dangerous, Adam. You could die. Or worse end up possessed by something you really don‘t want to be.”

“I can do it,” Adam repeats and gives Monte a pleading look. “Monte, I know I can. I just need to know if you think it will work.”

Monte looks torn before finally saying, “Yeah, I think it could work.”

Adam beams at him. “Yeah?”

Monte looks at him seriously, “Yes, but for Christ’s sake be careful.”

“I will,” Adam tells him.

“I mean it,” Monte puts out his pinky. “Promise me.”

Adam rolls his eyes but pinky promises him. “I promise.”

Monte eyes him, “Alright. I take it we’re not going to make it to band practice tonight.”

Adam becomes sheepish, “Uh, whoops? I forgot.”

Monte rolls his eyes, “I figured. Now tell me about this Tommy fellow.”

Adam gives him an exasperated look but does as he’s told.

Adam’s been gone for hours and Tommy’s been through every emotion twice. Angry, sad, scared, frustrated, and hopeful. Like a bi-polar person on crack. When Adam finally bangs his way through the door Tommy’s nerves are so shot he feels like a deep fried Thanksgiving turkey.

Adam comes in all bright eyed and bushy tailed and excited and Tommy wants to punch him in the face. But he’s an adult and will listen to what Adam has to say before any punches will be thrown.

“I have a plan and I really think it will work,” Adam begins and proceeds to tell Tommy his plan to summon Caroline and to make her reverse the curse. Tommy listens quietly, and although he starts to feel a spark of excitement himself, is still too upset with Adam to say anything.

Adam runs out of wind and fucking beams at Tommy. Oblivious motherfucker. Tommy’s urge to throw things rises.

“Tommy?” Adam asks hesitantly and when Tommy doesn’t say anything frowns. “Hey, this is good news! You can be excited, it’s okay.”

Tommy gives him a scathing look, “Yes, if by a sheer miracle we can pull this off I’ll be excited. Till then I’ll wallow in self-pity, if that‘s okay with you?”

Adam wilts and looks at Tommy like he’s just kicked his puppy. Repeatedly. It makes Tommy’s rage completely dissolve, leaving him slumped in the kitchen chair. He feels like an ass. A douchebag. A bag of dicks.

“I- I- Tommy,” Adam looks upset and it just makes Tommy feel guiltier. “Did I do something wrong?”

Tommy rubs his eyes, “No, God. I’m sorry. I’m an ass.” Tommy gives him an apologetic look.

“I know, but tell me what’s wrong anyway.” Tommy gives him a small smile and Adam continues, “It sounds impossible, I know, but this will work.” Adam gives him a reassuring smile. “I’ll make it work.”

Tommy doesn’t say anything and Adam asks again, “ What’s wrong?”

Tommy laughs, “Everything.”

Adam gets down on his knees in front of him, “A little more specific.”

Tommy shakes his head but says in a small voice, “You left me. I didn‘t,” Tommy pauses and Adam takes his hands, encouragingly. “What if you didn’t come back?”

Tommy whispers the last words and he knows he’s being pathetic but he hadn’t known where Adam had ran off too and Tommy really doesn’t know what he would do without him. Probably die.

“Aww, Tommy, I’m not going anywhere,” Adam gives him look so earnest and open Tommy wants to climb into his lap and never leave. “Baby, you’re stuck with me.”

“Yeah?” Tommy’s an insecure pathetic loser and he’s okay with that.

Adam gets up and offers him a hand. “Come with me.” Tommy doesn’t have to be told twice and takes Adam’s hand.

Adam leads him to the bedroom and then backs him against the bed. He kisses him then, softly and like he has all the time in the world to explore Tommy’s mouth with his own. Adam nips gently at his bottom lip before pulling back and asking, “What do you want?’ He slips a hand through Tommy’s hair and kisses along his jaw. “Anything. Tell me.”

Tommy knows exactly what he wants. Everything. And to forget everything just for a moment. “Fuck me.” He pulls Adam’s head up to look at him. “Fuck me. Please.”

Adam kind of shudders and Tommy knew he was a toppy bastard. He really doesn’t mind. Like really. Tommy actually gets a little dizzy with all the blood rushing down at the thought.

“Okay,” Adam tells him then starts pulling roughly at Tommy’s shirt to get it off. Tommy huffs out a laugh and lifts his hands up to help. They get it off and then they’re just grinning at each other. It lifts a tension that Tommy didn’t even now was there and it turns him loose and happy.

Adam pushes him down onto the bed and grins down at him before attacking his zipper. He gets them unfastened and tugs them down as Tommy lifts his hips. Adam pulls his pants and his boxers all the way off and chucks them to the floor.

Tommy’s completely naked and would feel awkward with Adam still dressed if it wasn’t for the look he was giving him. Adam wants him and Tommy needs Adam naked now.

“Adam,” Tommy complains but Adam just smiles at him.

“Patience is a virtue,” he sing-songs but then hurriedly takes his shirt and jeans off.

Leaving his own briefs on Tommy barely has time to see golden freckled skin before Adam drops to his knees and pulls Tommy to the edge of the bed. Adam makes a space between his spread thighs and Tommy’s almost all the way hard. His breath shudders out as Adam touches him with a hand and Tommy leans up on his elbows to watch. He has a second to see Adam smirk up at him and then Adam’s sucking him down.

Tommy groans as he’s encased in tight wet heat. He has to force his eyes to stay open as Adam pulls back enough to suck on the head of his cock. He starts slow, sucking the head before sliding all the way down and swallowing. Tommy bites his lip to keep from calling out and grips the bedclothes to keep from moving. Adam pulls back up again and drags his tongue up the underside of Tommy’s cock and he can’t take anymore.

“Adam,” he breathes down at him. When Adam just moans around his dick Tommy gets a hand in his hair and tugs. “Now, Adam, or I’m going to come down your throat.”

Adam moans again but relents and pulls off, asking hoarsely, “Where’s your stuff?”

Tommy’s breathing heavily but points to his nightstand. Adam leans over and rummages until finds a condom and lube. Tommy goes to lean back again but Adam stops him by holding out the lube. “Stretch yourself. I want to see.”

Tommy would protest but he’s past the point of caring and he really wants Adam’s dick in him tonight. He takes the lube and slicks his fingers before reaching back behind his thigh to circle his hole. Adam’s right there between his thighs, watching intently, and Tommy flushes but doesn’t stop, just pushes a finger in to the knuckle. Tommy stretches himself and he’s acutely aware of Adam but loses it a little when he hits his prostate. He groans loudly and adds another finger. He’s just about to add a third finger when he feels a slick hand against his own. Adam pushes in a finger alongside his and Tommy has to grab the base of his dick with has other hand to stop himself from coming. Adam plays a minute longer until Tommy yanks his fingers out and pushes Adam away. “Adam, now.”

Adam surges up and he’s lost his briefs somehow and Tommy doesn’t want to state the obvious, but damn, he’s huge. “I’m not going to be able to walk tomorrow, am I?”

Adam has the good grace not to look too smug. “Maybe.” His hair falls into his eyes and Adam pushes it back without thinking then frowns down at his lube covered hand he just ran through his hair. It’s ridiculously adorable and Tommy’s stupid heart clenches.

He’s also fucking gorgeous, all flushed and mussed with miles of freckled skin for Tommy to see. His mouth waters.

Adam gets a condom on quickly and then he’s pulling Tommy by a thigh and without pausing starts to slide into him. He pushes in slowly, letting Tommy get use to him, and he feels every sweet inch as Adam’s cock stretches him. Tommy breathes out on a grasp and wants more, for Adam to give Tommy all of him.

Adam stops for a minute, breathing harshly down at Tommy, then kisses him messily before pulling back out. He starts a hard rhythm and it feels so good Tommy fucking whimpers.

Tommy loses himself in it, hands gripping tight onto Adam’s back and shoulders, as he rides the sharp edge of almost there pleasure. Adam gets a hand between them and Tommy comes with a cry, jerking into Adam, whose rhythm stutters before he fucks into him harder, all finesse gone.

Tommy feels Adam arch and come through the fog and doesn’t come all the way back to himself till Adam collapses on top of him. Tommy waits and doesn’t really want him to move but breathing’s becoming an issue.

Tommy squirms and Adam gets the message, pulling out with a sigh and falling down beside Tommy. He takes the condom off and ties it, and then throws it in the general direction of the trash. Tommy picks up a t-shirt and half-heartedly wipes them down before throwing it too and vowing never to move again. Thankfully, Adam throws a blanket over them and cuddles him to his chest. Tommy’s so fucking in love with him it hurts.

They lay in silence for a while until Adam says, “We should do that again. After next week, I mean. If you still want to.” They have four days left.

Tommy smiles and plays with Adam’s hand on his chest, noticing his chipped black nail polish. “Yeah, I would like that.”

Adam moves his hand up his chest and his fingers glance the locket. Adam jerks back with a hiss and brings his hand to his mouth. “It burned me,” he says around his fingers.

“What? I didn’t feel anything,” Tommy says and tries to pry Adam’s fingers out of his mouth. “Here. Let me see.”

Adam gives him his hand and sure enough there are two red patches at the tip of Adam’s index and middle finger. “I don’t think it likes me,” Adam says sulkily.

“Huh,” Tommy says. “I didn’t know lockets had feelings. Even cursed and homicidal ones.” Tommy looks amused at Adam’s disgruntled face and then puts Adam’s burnt fingers in his own mouth and gently sucks on them.

Adam gets a heated look in his eyes but says, still peeved, “I still don’t think it likes me.”

Tommy rolls his eyes and gives Adam his hand back. “I don’t think it likes me, either, since it’s trying to kill me and all.” Tommy reaches down and touches the locket himself but the stone only feels unnaturally warm like usual.

“See!” Adam tells him. “I get bad, angry vibes from it. It doesn’t want me near it.”

“That’s weird,” Tommy says and Adam nods his head in agreement.

Adam gets a speculative look in his eye. “Yeah, it is.”

Part Four

Fic: Let it in that ray of light, 2/4

2011-02-02T01:26:41Z

Adam is stressed. He’s been balancing work, band practice, making sure his friends know he’s still alive, his usual following of lost ghosts who need his help, and following (not stalking, it’s not stalking, even if he knows what type of coffee Tommy gets at Starbucks and that he’s owned the pawn shop for a year. People just like to gossip!) Tommy around so he doesn’t die a tragic death. All last week he’d been terrified he would walk into the store and find Tommy dead in some horrible way. He imagined a hundred different scenarios (stabbed, shot, eaten by wild dogs), and each was more gruesome than the last one. (killed by zombies was the worst followed by decapitation by serial killer. Yes, he watches too much TV) Or that Tommy wouldn’t be there at all.

He’s also steadfastly ignoring his attraction to Tommy or his seemingly mutual interest in him. He’s vowed not to get involved until he saves Tommy. He doesn’t think of the other option, it ends in heartache. So it’s safe to say that he has a lot on his plate and would totally cry for an hour alone and a bag of weed. He needs to unwind so bad he’s been popping antacids like tic-tacs. Sunday he’d been a complete wreck and today he’d gotten off work as soon as he could and is totally prepared for what he might find when he walks into Tommy’s shop. Except he isn’t, not even a little bit.

He walks in and sees Tommy ringing up a customer. He’s looks fine, if paler than usual and tired looking. Adam breathes a sigh of relief and goes to look around the store when he notices the girl. He thinks he’s seen her here before for a couple seconds, but now she’s standing unusually close to Tommy by the cash register. She sees him and gives him a look all ghosts give him. Recognition. He hopes she doesn’t come talk to him and even though he’s gotten really good at talking out the side of his mouth it’s still really awkward in public. But she just turns back to staring at Tommy.

Adam shrugs and goes to browse the shelves for anything new. He doesn’t find anything and he’s just rounding the corner when he hears Tommy say quietly, “You know this cryptic bullshit has gotten really fucking old.” There’s no one there, well besides the ghost, and Tommy is looking down at the counter. “Like, seriously.”

Adam panics and starts babbling, “I’m not cryptic! Maybe I just like pawn shops! There’s nothing wrong with that. It’s not a crime.” Adam internally facepalms as Tommy gapes at him. “And I really like the customer service. It’s totally awesome!” Adam flashes a fake smile and wants to kill himself and his guilty conscience.

“He wasn’t talking to you. He was talking to me.” The pretty ghost beside Tommy says and she looks both amused and uninterested at the same time. It’s quite a feat.

Adam turns to her automatically and blurts out, “Wait, what?”

Tommy startles at that and then exclaims, “You can see her!”

It’s Adam’s turn to gape and stare at one then the other. “Yes?” he says hesitantly. “I’m going to go out on a limb here and say you can too?”

Tommy’s eyes kind of bug out of his head and he flails, waving his arms around and jumping up and down. It’s hilariously adorable. “I’m not crazy!” Tommy yells. “Or on drugs!”

“Drugs?” Adam asks stupidly.

“Yeah, I mean, what’s the probability of us having the same hallucination.” Tommy stops jumping and looks so earnest that Adam smiles at him.

“Not very probable,” Adam tells him.

Tommy smiles back and waves a hand in front of the ghost. “You really can see her? What does she look like?”

“A little see through, really pretty and wearing some kind of ancient white night dress.” Adam tells Tommy while watching her fiddle with her hair. She seems shy all a sudden and he lowers his voice, “What’s your name, sweetheart?”

It’s Tommy that answers, “Isabelle. It’s about the only thing she’s told me. Well, besides implying that I’m going to die.”

Adam’s head snaps back to Tommy, “What? How?” He waits and when Tommy shakes his head turns back to Isabelle. “And when? That would also be good to know.”

Isabelle frowns and looks miserable before vanishing. “Wait,” Adam yells after her, “Hey!”

Tommy just sighs. “She does that a lot.”

“Huh.” Then looking at Tommy Adam notices he’s still feeling the waves of dread and the fear of imminent doom coming off him but it‘s different. It feels muted. It’s like the bad thing has already happened, like he’s already gotten sick and they’re just waiting on the inevitable. Like what happened to his grandpa. “Tommy, what happened? What did Isabelle tell you?”

Tommy looks a little worried but then pulls down his shirt to revel a locket. As soon as Adam sees it a chill runs down his spine and he only vaguely hears what Tommy’s saying, “I found this and when I put it on it got all weird. I could suddenly see Isabelle and then the locket wouldn’t come off and she said it would when I’m dead and, I don’t know, it‘s all just really freaking weird.”

Adam swallows hard and tires not to take a step back. That locket is… wrong. He jerks his eyes away from it and looks back up at Tommy. “…but it hasn’t done anything. Besides not come off, I mean, and letting me see ghosts, well, only Isabelle. It’s really kind of useless, no powers or anything.”

“Tommy,” Adam grits out and then steels himself. “Can I touch it?”

Tommy looks startled. “Yeah, yeah, sure.”

Adam reaches out a hand and touches the dark blue jewel with his fingertips and even forewarned he’s not prepared for the electric shock that punches through him. He has to force himself not to jerk back as he feels the raw and completely overwhelming power the stone gives off. Adam feels it and tries to understand what it means but all he finds is unearthly energy, a curse, and Isabelle and… oh. Oh, fuck.

Adam finally jerks back and backs away a few steps and starts swearing. “Fuck.” Adam fidgets in place, trying to brush off the lingering feeling of the locket. “Tommy. Shit, shit. Where the fuck did you find that thing?”

Tommy’s starting to look scared which means Adam looks as freaked out as he feels.

“Okay, okay,” Adam begins to Tommy. “This is going to sound really crazy and probably weirdly suspicious. But listen, I’m kind of, um, psychic?” Adam gathers his thoughts to explain and hopes Tommy believes him and doesn’t freak out.

Tommy just frowns a little though. “You’re psychic and can see ghosts?” and now he sounds skeptical. “What can you, like, see the future?”

“No, nothing like that. It’s more of a feeling. I can sense things other people can’t and sometimes, um sometimes, I can sense things about to happen.” Adam fidgets and gets a little anxious. “Like, once I knew a friend was pregnant before she did or that one time I knew my cousin was so going to get arrested. Apparently he was a dumbass and kept weed in his car.” Adam smiles briefly and then turns serious, “Or when I knew my grandpa was going to die before anyone even knew he was sick.”

Tommy seems to take this in before finally saying, “When you first came in here, you,” but he trails off before finishing with a frustrated, “Adam, what are you saying?”

“Last week when I came in here I felt you were in danger,” Adam stops and cringes at how stupid he sounds but keeps going, “That’s why I’ve been coming in here every day. I thought I could help you, somehow, even though I couldn’t tell you.”

Tommy’s face flashes between confused, disbelief and shock. “Uh huh.” He’s quiet for a moment then asks, “Am I going to die? Is that what you felt.”

Adam gets really uncomfortable and starts nervously twisting his hair by his ear. “Um, I, uh felt,” Adam sees Tommy waiting patiently and gets it together enough to blurt out, “I think so, yes.”

Tommy shakes his head hard as if to clear it and asks, “What did you feel, Adam? What’s wrong with the locket?”

Adam lets out a breath, “It’s cursed. I mean, obviously, but…” Adam stops and tries again. “I think it killed Isabelle.”

Tommy must have already thought of this because he breathes out, “How?”

“I don’t know for sure but,” Adam doesn’t exactly know how to explain what he felt without sounding ridiculous but tries anyway, “I think it might have sucked the life out of her.”

This statement is met with silence and then Tommy busts out a laugh that quickly spins into uncontrollable laughter. “It’s going to suck the life out of me,” Tommy finishes the statement with a peal of giggles that makes him have to hold onto the counter to keep from falling over.

Adam takes this with great sophistication as only a person use to sounding nuts can. “And it does this by pulling out your soul.”

It just makes Tommy laugh harder until he’s all but rolling around on the floor. Adam walks toward him and waits him out. When Tommy’s finally wore himself out he offers him a hand up. Tommy takes it and smiles a little apologetically up at him. “Sorry, I just. I mean, this is insane.”

As Adam agrees with this assessment he just nods his head. “We need to get Isabelle to talk to us.” Adam looks at the locket peeking out of Tommy’s shirt and suppresses a shudder. “And find out where the hell that locket came from.”

Tommy looks at him funny. “You’re really going to help me?” He sounds slightly incredulous.

Adam smiles at him, “Let me tell you a little secret.” He leans forward and whispers, “I don’t really like pawn shops.”

Tommy takes Adam back to his office and tells him that he hasn’t been able to find where the locket came from yet. They sit down and Tommy shows him the stacks of papers he has left to go through and they start working on them. He’s still freaked out about what Adam told him but tries to hide it by rambling to Adam his whole life story. Adam, bless him, lets him and listens intently with an amused smile on his face.

“So when my uncle died I was like ‘Fuck you, Albert Freizmen’,” Tommy tells Adam while looking through his stack of old receipts. “He was my manager and a giant dick in a sea of dickbags. Anyway, I hated that job and relished the opportunity to tell him to fuck off.”

Adam hums at him and Tommy tries to shut up but ends up asking after a few minutes, “What about you? What do you do?”

Adam looks up at him then makes a face. “I’ve been working at Macy’s to pay my rent. But I have a band!”

Tommy perks up, immediately interested, and asks, “Do you play?”

“Sing,” Adam tells him. “I’ve been trying to get signed forever. My big dream and all that. I usually work in theater but I needed a break for a while.”

“Really? That’s awesome.” Tommy grins at him then proceeds to tell him his plans on turning this place into a music store and how much he loves guitars and plays whenever he can. Which leads to a conversation about their favorite musicians and then they just geek out about everything and anything, research forgotten. Adam also tells him about being psychic and a medium and Tommy thinks it’s totally cool that he can see ghosts everywhere.

Adam even tells him about being a psychic consult for the police once which Tommy thinks is pretty badass until Adam tells him the story.

“It was my first case after trying my hardest to convince the PD that I was legit. I just wanted to help, you know? Why would I have these powers and not be able to do anything with them?” Adam frowns and gestures with his hand, saying more heatedly, “I mean otherwise it’s just cruel. Knowing someone is going to get hurt or die and only being able to watch. What would be the point?”

Tommy nods in agreement. “That would be epically shitty.”

Adam spares him a smile. “Anyway, to say my first case was a disaster is an understatement. Major understatement. I think it was a trial run, or a test to see what I could do. All I was told was to help them find the locations of a suspected smuggling ring. They didn’t say what the cargo was just that it was passing US borders from Mexico.”

Adam grimaces and drags a hand down his face. “I thought it was drugs or guns, you know? But it was people. The first place we walked into I could feel about thirty people beneath my feet.” Adam lets out a humorless laugh, “I wanted to catch bad guys or just make the world a better place, some shit like that. Not turn in a bunch of scared people hoping for a better life.”

Tommy’s so engrossed he blurts out, “What did you do?”

Adam gives him a wry smile. “I said the place was clear then lied and gave them a false lead.”

Tommy grins at him. “Of course you did.”

Adam lets out a laugh, “The police didn’t seem to appreciate it though cause it cost me my reputation. When they couldn’t find anything at the place I told them they thought I was a fraud and wouldn’t let me work with them again.”

“Their loss,” Tommy tells him.

“I know. I would have at least liked to have caught a serial killer first.”

Tommy laughs and leans across his desk towards Adam. “So now you follow strange men around to see if you can save them from mortal peril?”

Adam leans forward too and says lavishly, “Only the pretty ones.”

Tommy chokes on air and knows he’s turning a bright pink when Adam fucking winks at him and then Tommy busts out laughing at Adam’s ridiculousness. Adam starts laughing too and Tommy feels a giant wave of affection towards him that he can’t hide. He’s totally heart-eyeing Adam right now.

Adam quits laughing and turns a little serious. “I do want to help people, I do. But sometimes I just want to sing. Just for me. Performing is,” Adam waves his hand in the air, excited, “everything. I don’t have to think. I just feel. All that energy you can–.”

“...lose yourself in it,” Tommy finishes for him.

Adam beams at him. “Exactly!” They grin at each other stupidly and Tommy basks in their complete understanding of each other.

They turn back to music and are just agreeing that Bowie has better visuals but Queen has better music, duh, when Adam’s cell phone rings and startles them both.

Adam mutters an apology and answers with, “Shit, I’m sorry. I forgot. I’ll be right there.” Adam listens then apologizes a few more times before hanging up.

Adam looks at him guiltily and at the pile of papers they haven’t even touched. “Tommy, I’m so sorry. I forgot we had band practice tonight. We have a show tomorrow and I–” Adam stops and looks so guilty and torn that Tommy lets him off the hook.

“It’s okay. We can do this later.” Tommy smiles briefly, but before Adam leaves, asks what he’s been wanting to know since they came in here. “Adam, how do you know what the locket will do? What exactly did you feel?”

Adam looks pained at the question but not surprised. “I felt it pulling at you.” He makes a frustrated sound. “It’s hard to explain but it’s like… forcing your energy or soul, or whatever you want to call it, out of your body.” Adam tells him with a pensive look on his face, “It’s a very powerful curse. I don’t even want to know the fucked up shit someone had to do in order to get a curse like this to work.”

Tommy mulls on that for a minute before finally saying, “Never mind how, what about why? Why would someone make a curse like this?”

Adam looks grim. “That’s something the person who the curse was meant for should know.”

“Isabelle,” Tommy says.

“Isabelle,” Adam agrees.

~~~~~

For the next three days Adam comes over as much as he can, even calling off work, and saying that he thinks the people at Macy’s make-up counter can fend for themselves for a few days when Tommy protests. Tommy tries to not seem immensely grateful but probably fails miserably. They try to get Isabelle to talk to them but she’s a Fort Knox of information. The only useful thing she lets slip is that from the day he put on the locket he has one month before his soul parts with his body permanently. So at least he doesn’t have to worry about dropping dead at a moments notice. Though after that slip Isabelle won’t say anything to them at all. She just wanders around the shop and completely ignores them. Tommy gets so irritated that every time she wanders by him he starts throwing objects through her. Rude or not it makes him feel marginally better.

Tommy also goes to see Adam’s show. It’s just at a small dimly light club but Tommy meets a different Adam than the one he knows. One that is ten times more fierce and fabulous and he has to restrain himself from molesting Adam as soon as he walks off the stage.

Although, when they get back to the store afterwards and Tommy has all but exhausted himself with telling Adam how awesome his is, he thinks his question is completely reasonable from everything he’s learned about Adam and does not deserve the laughter it gets.

Adam’s grabbing his side and shaking with mirth as he repeats, “Am I part angel?”

So maybe he’s had too much to drink at the club and is just this side of drunk. It’s still a legit question. Tommy frowns, “What? You have these awesome gifts and are incredibly talented and fucking gorgeous. You can’t just be human. It wouldn’t be fair.”

Adam grins at him and Tommy can feel the blush staining his cheeks. Whatever, if Adam doesn’t know he’s crushing the fuck out of him then he’s blind.

“You think I’m gorgeous?” Adam sounds flattered but there’s also a hint of seriousness to the question. Maybe he is blind.

Tommy rolls his eyes and teases him, “Shut up, I’m not feeding your ego anymore. Your head’s already abnormally large.”

Adam barks out a laugh but then kindly changes the subject. “No, I just don’t even believe in angels so how can I be part one?” Adam smiles ruefully, “I pretty sure I’m all human.”

“You don’t believe in angels?” Tommy thinks about it himself. “What about heaven? Hell?”

“No and no,” Adam says and then shakes his head. “God’s above my pay grade though. I don’t know anything for sure, obviously, but I staunchly believe there is an afterlife of some sort. Probably more than one.”

Tommy digests that before saying, “I really hope there isn’t a God.”

Adam cocks his head to the side. “Why do you hope that?”

“Because I don’t think I would like him very much.” Tommy watches Adam and adds, “Or at all.”

Adam is quiet for a second then says, “I can’t disagree with that.” Then he smiles lightly at Tommy. “I think we all end up where we’re supposed to.” Isabelle wanders by them, looking depressed as usual, and Adam amends his statement a little sadly, “Eventually.”

A few days later they hit jackpot. Adam while looking through an old shoebox of receipts he found hiding in a broom closet finds what they are looking for. It’s for the sale of one sapphire diamond crusted locket and it has a name and number of the previous owner printed neatly on it. They also find out why Tommy’s uncle never sold it. He’d bought it off a guy named Simon Turner for a hefty price that was still probably only half what the locket was worth and then died a few days later.

Adam’s excited and calls the number immediately and gets the answering machine. He leaves a short message and hopes like hell this guy knows something.

Adam glances at Tommy and tries not to show his worry. Tommy’s been trying to hide it but he’s been getting tired and weaker as the days go on. They know time is running out and the physical evidence of the curse is startling to them both. It’s only been a week and he’s already showing signs and that just can’t be good. Adam’s been privately researching as much as he can about curses and spells. Like how to stop or reverse them and so far he’s found a bunch of useless information and a little that might be useful but also extremely dangerous, and frankly, downright scary.

As they wait for the guy to call them back, and to cheer them both up, Adam drags them out shopping (all right, that was just to cheer him up but Tommy seemed to have fun too. He got a new coat out of it anyway.) and after much debate (Adam wanted to go bowling. What’s wrong with bowling?) but Tommy wants Adam to sing for him again so they go to a karaoke bar. Despite his reservations Adam has a blast and when he starts singing Bohemian Rhapsody the look Tommy gives him almost changes his mind about no funny business until he finds a way to stop Tommy from dying. He might waver again when he calls Tommy up to sing Total Eclipse of the Heart with him and he’s completely tone deaf and Adam just finds it hilarious. They giggle their way through the last half of the song.

After a few more rounds of drinks and songs Tommy gets noticeably tired and Adam calls it a night. He takes Tommy back to the store and checks for any messages in Tommy’s office while Tommy grabs his stuff and starts to lock up.

Adam listens to a couple of messages about price matching and how much something or other is worth and when he hears a woman’s voice on the last one he tunes out, disappointed.

“Tommy, are you rea–” Adam cuts off abruptly and turns back to the answering machine as Tommy comes up behind him.

“…and Simon Turner is my brother. I heard the message you left about a locket he sold? A diamond sapphire one? It was my mother’s and my brother must have sold it after she died. Anyway, I’d be happy to answer any questions about it.” The woman leaves a number and the machine beeps and says there are no more new messages.

Adam turns to Tommy who looks worried. “Should we call her back?”

Adam shakes his head. “No, it’s too late. We’ll call her tomorrow. Come on, I’ll take you home.” Adam starts walking towards the door but notices that Tommy isn’t following. “Hey,” he calls back to him.

“What if she doesn’t know anything?” Tommy sounds young and scared. “She didn’t sound like she knew anything.”

Adam automatically wants to reassure him. So he does. “Come on, someone has to know something. I mean, a locket that sucks your soul out is kind of hard to miss.” Tommy continues to look worried and Adam doesn’t like it. He walks toward Tommy and pulls him into a hug. Tommy is tense for all of a second before he melts into it. “I will find a way to get it off, Tommy. I won’t let it take you.”

Tommy shoulders start to shake and for a wild moment Adam thinks shit he’s crying but then he realizes Tommy’s laughing into his shoulder.

Tommy’s pulls back and wails, “This is absurd!” Then starts cracking up again.

Adam slaps him on the shoulder and says miffed, “Hey, I was comforting you! Don’t laugh,” but he’s smiling as he says it.

Tommy stops laughing and smiles up at him. “I am comforted! I just,” Tommy pauses and then looks down. “Thank you. Seriously, I don’t know what I would do without you.” He looks back up shyly, “Probably be in the nut house by now.”

Adam gets a warm fuzzy feeling and tries to squash it to ill effect. He’s has to remind himself that Tommy’s life is in his hands. He can’t be distracted. A tiny traitorous voice in the back of his head asks what if you don’t get another chance?

All of this is smashed to pieces and rendered obsolete because Tommy leans up on his toes and kisses him on the mouth. Adam makes a startled sound but quickly gets with the program and with a groan kisses back. He then thinks, fuck it, and takes control of the kiss and backs Tommy against his desk. Adam doesn’t want to think anymore. About why he should or shouldn’t do this. He just wants to feel, to get lost in the moment. To lose himself in Tommy. He gets a hand up in Tommy’s hair and licks his way into Tommy’s mouth. Tommy moans and tries to get closer so with a swipe of his arm pens and paper go flying as Adam lifts him up onto the desk.

Tommy gets a hand under his shirt and Adam breaks the kiss. He sucks in air as he grips Tommy’s thigh and pulls him taut against him. Tommy wraps his legs around him and they both shiver at the contact. Even through two layers of jeans Adam can feel him hot and hard against him. It feels so good that Adam grinds down hard, making Tommy’s grip tighten on his back.

Tommy starts kissing and sucking up Adam’s neck and Adam kisses him again, tongue meeting Tommy’s roughly. They make out for a while and Adam can’t help but rub down, wanting to get them both off. It turns fast and hot and then Tommy's making hitching noises in his throat. Adam pulls back enough to breathe hotly against his mouth and thrusts harder until Tommy cries out and shudders against him. Adam groans loudly and Tommy kisses him as he comes in his pants.

Adam comes all the way back to himself to feel Tommy biting at his collarbone and he shudders in aftershock.

Tommy lifts his head. “Adam?”

“Yeah?” He sounds slightly hoarse so he clears his throat.

“Can we do that out of our pants next time?” Tommy makes a face. “It’s already really uncomfortable.”

Adam laughs softly and God he can’t believe he just came in his jeans like an idiot. He looks at Tommy all mussed and flushed and smiling at him. On second thought, no, he totally can believe that. In fact he wants to do it again. Preferably soon.

“Yeah, okay.” Adam flashes him a smile. “I think we can mange that.” Adam pulls away and lets Tommy’s legs fall to the floor. Tommy stands up gingerly and makes another frown down at his pants. He doesn’t think it’s endearing or anything. Adam’s smile slips and he doesn’t regret what he just did, can’t, but realizes he has to be more cautious. He knows himself and that when he falls he falls hard. All consuming with fireworks and the passion to match. Adam also knows his feelings for Tommy are spinning rapidly out of his control and he can’t let that happen. He could easily lose focus and it could cost Tommy his life. Something he would never forgive himself for and isn’t an option.

They walk out to the car in silence, both lost in their own thoughts, and don’t say anything until Adam pulls up to Tommy’s apartment. “Come up with me,” Tommy tells him.

Adam winces and says nervously, “Tommy, I don’t know. Maybe we should wait till we– oof.” Tommy shuts him up by kissing him thoroughly.

Tommy pulls off abruptly and says, “If there’s a possibility I could die why in the hell would I want to wait?”

Adam shakes his head. His reasons for wanting to wait are not Tommy‘s. “I have no idea.”

Tommy gets out of the car but leans back in to say, “Are you coming or not?”

“Okay,” Adam says stupidly. And that’s that.

Part Three

Fic: Let it in that ray of light, 1/4

2011-02-02T01:14:32Z

Let it in that ray of light

Master Post

Tommy unlocks the door to the store twenty minutes before he has to open. It’s Monday and he’s balancing a Starbucks coffee in one hand as he unsticks the door and walks into, as it proclaims above the door, Ratliff’s Pawn Shop. He turns the lights on as he walks towards his office behind the front counter. His office is vaguely the size of a small walk-in closest and probably just as cluttered. Tommy sets his coffee on his desk that’s covered with piles of paper, some inventory he hasn’t put out yet, and his ancient computer that only works when it wants to and never when he wants it to.

Tommy sits down in his ancient, yet surprisingly plush, computer chair. His uncle may have failed at most things but he knew how to be kind to one’s backside. He sips his coffee as the computer boots up and tries to remember if he has anything that needs to be done today. All that comes to mind is a couple of bills due that he can’t pay yet. Tommy sighs and refrains from faceplanting onto his desk. This is not exactly what he had in mind when he had taken over the store after his uncle died of a heart attack a year ago. At the time he had been working at a shit eight to five cubicle job with an asshole for a boss. So when he’d learned that his uncle had left the store to him he had jumped at the opportunity to be his own boss and leave that corporate hell hole.

Tommy sighs again. Running a pawn shop isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. One, he has to do everything himself and two, he sucks at haggling (one sad look from an old lady and he folds like a cheap suit) and three, he’s barely making ends meet. To put it bluntly Tommy hates the pawn shop and had eventually planned on starting something else. Maybe one day he could open a music store and actually sell something he was interested in and knew about. To have his own store be filled with guitars and drums and music would be so fucking amazing he can almost taste it. But, well, starting a business takes money and he has exactly none.

The computer finally flashes on and Tommy checks his e-mails to see if anything is coming in today before walking back out and opening up the front of the shop. It was Monday and he usually got a steady stream of customers and he needs to put out some new inventory. It was going to be a long day.

~~~~~

It’s late and Tommy’s thinking about closing up early when a guy with a shiny blue jacket walks in and hurriedly starts looking around. The guy is tall with black hair that is kind of all over the place and when the late afternoon light hits his jacket it sparkles. Even with a giant pair of sunglasses covering half his face Tommy can tell he’s good looking. He rummages through a shelf of animal figurines and Tommy tries not to stare but he’s the only customer in the store. Tommy debates whether to go over and ask him if he needs any help and he’s just about to open his mouth when the guy walks over, waving a porcelain cat in his hand, and starts talking.

“So I’m on my way home, right?” The guy stops by the counter in front of him and continues, “And I’m tired and cranky cause it’s Monday and everyone hates Monday and out of nowhere I remember it’s my grandma’s birthday party tonight.” The guy takes a breath and keeps going, “For her 70th birthday and I haven’t gotten her anything. I’m the worst grandson in the world,” he says the last part mournfully and pushes his sunglasses up onto his head. His bright blue eyes plead right at Tommy. “Help?”

Tommy sucks in a small breath because the guy isn’t just good looking, he’s fucking gorgeous. His eyes are smeared with days old eyeliner and he’s giving him a sad hopeful look. Tommy wants to help, boy, does he want to help.

Tommy smiles brightly, hopefully reassuringly and not creepily, “What does your grandmother like?”

The guy visibly sags, “Um,” he says and looking at his hand he puts the cat figurine down on the counter. “Stuff like this and... I don’t know, jewelry. She likes old stuff, I think. She goes antiquing all the time but, um, I saw this place first.” The guy looks at him sheepishly. “And I’m not walking into an antique store. I’m cliché enough.”

Tommy laughs and tries to not to look too happy about this information and fails horribly by the way the guys smiles back at him, looking pleased.

The guy holds his hand out and says, “I’m Adam.”

Tommy shakes his hand and gets out, “Tommy,” before Adam jerks his hand back roughly, like he’d been burned.

“I- you- um,” Adam stutters at him, looking wide-eyed and shocked. Adam tilts his head to the side and stares at him intently not saying anything.

Tommy’s confused and after a minute he asks, “Are you okay?”

Adam snaps out of it and says, “What? Oh, yeah, I’m fine.” He laughs nervously and looks down. “I’m just tired, you know. Um, I’m just going to look around some more.” And with that he walks off leaving Tommy staring after him. Huh. Well, that was weird. Tommy shakes his head and goes to see if he has anything Adam’s grandma might like. What he does for weird hot guys.

Adam Lambert is a psychic medium. He is also an idiot. He refrains from slapping himself on the forehead as he looks at a shelf full of watches. He’d totally just freaked out cute pawn shop guy. It wasn’t his fault though! Cute pawn shop guy had freaked him out first! Adam sighs and picks up an old pocket watch. He hates this, really hates this shit. As soon as he had touched the guy’s hand, no Tommy’s hand, a giant ball of dread had hit him hard in the stomach. When he’d looked at him, really looked at him, Adam had noticed he was lit up like a fucking Christmas tree of bad energy. Adam puts the watch back and glances at Tommy who’s going through a box on the floor a few shelves over. Adam’s internal Danger, Will Robinson! Danger! siren is blaring loud and clear at him. Tommy’s in trouble.

Adam looks away with a frown and amends that statement. Tommy’s going to die. Probably in an extremely horrifying way if the nauseating, sick to his stomach, feeling he’s getting is any indication. The only other time he’d felt like this was before his grandpa had found out he had terminal cancer. And worse this feels almost as bad as what he’d felt around a girl he’d worked with before she was beaten to death by her boyfriend. He still has nightmares about that.

Adam looks over at Tommy again and sees him looking back at him hesitantly. Adam can’t help it, he smiles back at him. It’s not fair, Adam thinks sadly, he doesn’t want him to die. He’s too cute to die.

Tommy walks over with something in his hands and a little shyly says, “Um, I thought this was pretty. Uh, I mean, if you liked that kinda thing,” Tommy coughs, “For your grandma?”

He’s holding a small porcelain elephant and it is pretty, white with dark blue ears and tail. It’s old but obviously well made and Adam loves it on sight. “Perfect,” he tells Tommy with a bright smile.

Tommy ducks his head shyly, “Yeah?”

“Yeah, how much is it?” Adam asks him.

Tommy makes a funny face then says, “Ten dollars.”

And Adam’s not dumb, it totally costs more than that, but he just raises his eyebrows at Tommy. “I’ll take it. My grandma will love it.”

Tommy gives him a small smile before going over to ring up the elephant. Adam lets out a shaky breath as soon as Tommy’s farther away. The dude’s a walking wave of fear and dread. Adam wonders how he missed it when he first walked in the door because it’s overwhelming. He takes a couple shallow breaths and tries not to throw up at the wave of emotions hitting him as he follows Tommy over to the checkout counter. Tommy’s wrapping the elephant up in newspaper and Adam gets his wallet out, pulling out a twenty.

Tommy finishes putting the elephant in a brown paper bag. He takes the money from Adam’s hand and Adam has to fight back a flinch as their fingers brush and Adam’s hit with another wave of panic inducing dread. Tommy doesn’t seem to notice anything, clacking at an ancient cash register and pulling out a ten in change.

“Keep it,” Adam tells him when Tommy tries to hand the ten to him. Tommy shakes his head and opens his mouth to say something, but Adam just grins. “It’s a tip for fine services rendered. You saved my life.”

Tommy totally goes pink in the face and says, “Thank you.” And a plan begins to form for Adam because it’s not fair. What‘s the point of feeling this shit if he can‘t change it?

Adam shakes his head and picks up the paper bag. “No, thank you. Seriously.” Adam shifts and says on his way out the door, “Nice shop. I’ll have to come back some time.” He backs out the door and grins one last time at Tommy before slipping his sunglasses back down his face and letting the door swing shut behind him.

~~~~~

Adam walks into the pawn shop the next day and sees Tommy reading a book behind the checkout counter. The shop is empty and Tommy looks up from his book when he hears the door shut. He sees that it’s Adam and smiles brightly up at him. Adam does a little wave in return and tries not to let his nerves show as he walks to the counter. He also ignores the doom and gloom still coming off Tommy.

“Hi,” Adam says because he’s witty and clever.

“Hey,” Tommy returns, “Adam, right?” When Adam nods, he adds, “Did your grandmother like the elephant?”

“Oh, yeah,” Adam tells him, remembering. “She loved it. I told her where I got it so you’ll probably get loads of little old ladies stopping by. My grandma has connections.”

Tommy laughs. “That’s awesome. Although, I’ll probably lose more money than I’ll make.”

Adam gives him a questioning look and Tommy laughs again. “I can’t say no to them. They are my retail Kryptonite. I swear they know it too cause they play me like a fiddle.”

Adam snorts. “Yeah, that sounds like my grandma, all right. She’s a shark.”

Tommy brushes back his blond hair with a hand and then plays with it, twirling it around his finger. After a minute he asks, “So can I do anything for you?” He then looks a little flushed and coughs into his hand before saying, “I mean, do you need me to help you find anything?”

Adam is totally charmed and isn’t even bothered by the fact that he doesn’t have a reason for being here. “Nah, I just wanted to look around. See if there’s anything I like.” Adam lets his eyes lingers on Tommy and is delighted when he blushes again. This would totally be awesome if he couldn’t still feel the cloud of danger surrounding Tommy. It puts a damper on his mood and he goes to browse the shelves. How the hell is he going to help Tommy when he has no idea what’s going to happen to him? He can’t very well tell him to go see a doctor and to stay away from buses. Tommy would just think he was crazy and possible put a retraining order on his ass. Which would be very unhelpful.

Adam walks back around to the front of the store and with a wave goodbye to Tommy he walks out the door. He has Operation: Follow Tommy the Pawn Shop Guy to plan.

Tommy has a stalker. That is not the weird part. No, instead of being freaked out like a normal person, he would like his stalker to please ask him the fuck out already. Adam had been in his store almost every day for the past week. Tommy even thought he saw him once leaving the Starbucks he goes to every day. Ever since that first day he comes in and asks how Tommy is doing, just some small talk, before leaving. Sometimes he buys something too, (he really likes the old necklaces Tommy has lying around) and Tommy’s left wondering what the hell is going on. He finally meets a hot gorgeous guy who might be interested in him and of course he turns out to be a total basket case. Eccentric if he wants to be nice. He doesn’t.

It’s Saturday and he’s going through some old stock in one of the back rooms he hasn’t touched all year. So he’s a bad store owner, whatever. Adam already came in tonight and he’s not bemoaning the fact that he won’t see Adam tomorrow because the store is closed. Tommy heaves out a sigh, he’s pathetic. He should totally just ask Adam out himself. What’s the worst thing that could happen? Stalked and skinned to be made into a meat suit? Hey, at least his stalker is hot. That’s gotta count for something.

Tommy starts unpacking boxes and puts his stupid hot stalker out of his mind. He needs to figure out what he has back here and what to pull out to the store front. It’s boring, tedious work but it relaxes him and he finds himself humming along to the radio he left on in his office. Tommy’s looking through a box of necklaces (shut up, he’s not thinking about which ones Adam would like) when he sees something shinny at the bottom of the box. He pulls it out and it’s a locket. It’s so hot to the touch that he almost drops it in surprise. It’s small and square with a big sapphire in the middle surrounded by diamonds. The locket is beautiful, old and probably worth a pretty penny. Tommy turns it over in his hands and it’s still unnaturally hot. He looks around to see what could have caused it but just finds the empty box. Tommy shrugs and unclasps the gold chain before putting it around his neck. He hooks it and lets it fall forward down into the open collar of his shirt.

Tommy goes to look in the mirror and is immediately dizzy, eyes blurring hard, and he has to grab onto the box in front of him to keep from falling. A shock of heat goes through him and the locket feels unnaturally heavy on his chest. It lasts all of a few seconds but Tommy feels off kilter afterwards.

“What the fuck?” Tommy complains to the room at large. He straightens up and tries to lift the locket off his chest but it won’t move. He starts to struggle at the chain but it won’t budge either and Tommy panics, thinking hysterically that it’s going to come alive and choke him to death. He’s clawing at his throat and struggling to breathe when he sees her in the corner of the room.

Tommy takes all of three seconds to scream bloody murder and then he’s running like a bat out of hell down the hall into the bathroom and slamming the door behind him. He locks it for good measure even though a small voice in his head tells him it won’t matter.

Tommy takes a moment to breathe harshly in the dim light before redoubling his efforts to get the locket off his neck. It’s like the sucker is super glued onto his skin. Why the fuck did he put it on in the first place, for fuck’s sake. Damn him and his weakness for shiny sparkly things. His fingernails scratch his neck, and ow fuck, but he has to get this blasted thing off because it’s making him hallucinate a pretty ghost with sad eyes. With a frustrated sigh he grabs the jeweled locket and starts tugging.

“It won’t come off,” whispers something by his ear. Tommy lets out and extremely high-pitched squeak and plasters himself against the bathroom mirror. She’s pretty, long blonde hair curled around a pale face, and wearing an old white nightgown. She’s also a little translucent.

Tommy squeaks again and says, “Whadjfkh!”

The girl, the ghost, just continues to look incredibly morose. “It won’t come off,” she says again.

Tommy just stares till he clears his throat and tries to say something intelligible, “W-why?”

The ghost and her sad dark eyes look down at the locket, the sapphire and diamonds sparkling even in the dim light. “It won’t come off until you’re dead,” she tells him and vanishes.

Tommy stares at the spot she vanished from for a few minutes before busting out laughing. If it’s vaguely hysterical no one is here to judge him. He also notices he’s crouched in the sink where he must have jumped into when the ghost first appeared. His pant hems are wet.

Tommy gingerly gets down and unlocks the bathroom door. He grabs his bag from his office and gets the hell out of there.

Tommy lets himself into his apartment a record ten minutes later and goes straight to the whiskey. He bypasses a glass and just takes a giant gulp from the bottle and welcomes the burn all the way down.

He spends the next few hours trying everything he can think of to get the locket off. Scissors, knives, a small saw, (where the fuck did that come from?) lube, (shut up, he thought he could unstick it) pliers, some wrenches, a screwdriver and finally a hammer. After a couple of nicks to the neck and half a bottle of whiskey Tommy calls it a day. He passes out across his bed clutching a can of WD-40.

~~~~~

A lone candle flickered on the bedside table casting the dark bedroom into shadows. The girl on the bed was young and even in sickness, sallow skinned and bruised sunken in eyes, was still quite beautiful. The man sitting beside her brushed a strand of sweaty blonde hair behind her ear. The girl reaches out and grips his hand and he starts to cry quietly.

“I love you,” she tells him fiercely. “I’ll always love you.”

It just makes the man cry harder, silent sobs wracking his body, “Oh, God.”

The girl’s breathing already slow and shallow turns ragged, like she knows what’s coming, and she clutches his hand tighter. She says the man’s name high and frightened until her grip goes slack and her breathing slowly stutters to a stop. He sees the moment life leaves her eyes, like a candle extinguished, and his howl of pain is heard throughout the house.

The girl’s beautiful sapphire locket slips and falls off as the man pulls her to him, sobbing hysterically into her neck, “I will never forget you, Isabelle…”

He doesn’t see the shadows move behind him.

Tommy wakes up to a pounding headache and a ghost standing over him. He only flails a little bit but ends up on the floor anyway. He doesn’t think, under the circumstance, that anyone would count it against him.

He grabs his head and peeks out over the side of the bed. She is still standing there looking down at him and if Tommy didn’t know any better he would think she looks a little amused.

Tommy groans and gets to his knees. “Don’t do that,” he says annoyed and then surprises himself by continuing, “What the fuck do you want? And why won’t this thing come off?” He gestures angrily at the locket. “What is this shit?”

The ghost makes earnest pleading eyes at him. “You were never supposed to have it,” she tells him. “I tried to warn you but you couldn’t see me.” She looks absolutely heartbroken when she says, “And now it’s too late.”

This doesn’t answer any of Tommy’s questions and he’s acutely aware that he’s talking to a ghost. In the daylight she’s faded, colors washed out like and overexposed photograph. She’s like something out of a movie and Tommy is beginning to wonder if he is hallucinating. Or on some drug he doesn’t remember taking. It would explain so much. Well, except who the ghost is and why he is hallucinating her and, all right, it wouldn’t explain anything other than that his brain is a weird and scary place.

“What’s your name?” he asks trying to distract himself.

The ghost looks confused for a second before saying softly, “Isabelle. My name’s Isabelle.”

Isabelle vanishes again after that and Tommy’s talking to himself, “Well, Isabelle, how about you tell me– Damn it!” Then something jogs his memory... Isabelle.

Tommy tries to remember his dream but it’s like chasing after wisps of fog. He can’t make anything out of it until he gets a flash of Isabelle wearing the locket and... dying. He tries to remember more but it just makes his head hurt worse. The dream is completely lost to him.

Tommy gets up and takes a hot shower and lets his mind wander. Questions and improbabilities circle in his head till the water goes cold. So Isabelle had died while wearing the locket? And as soon as he had put it on Tommy could suddenly see her. They were obviously tied together somehow, but how? Why? He gets dressed and decides to go into work today. He needs to find out where the fuck this locket came from.

~~~~~

About four hours later, a couple more unhelpful pop-in’s from Isabelle, and a tornadic mess of paper and receipts he is no closer to finding the previous owner of the locket. He does know that his uncle had to have been the one to procure it, but as he’d been way worse at documentation than Tommy is the likelihood of finding anything is slim to none. He really wished his uncle had embraced the technological age and had filed everything onto the computer. But his uncle had always marched to the beat of his own drum. That no one else could hear. What’s weirder is why hadn’t his uncle sold it right away? The locket has to be worth a small fortune. It was completely gorgeous if maybe on the homicidal side. And haunted by a ghost, can’t forget that part.

Speaking of the devil or, um, ghost, Isabelle, wanders into his office and just looks around aimlessly. She’s been doing that a lot actually, wandering around and looking various degrees of sad. Of course, if he was a ghost he wouldn’t be looking too happy, either, Tommy supposes. Tommy doesn’t even know if she can touch anything. Maybe he should throw something at her, see if it goes through her? Would that be rude? Tommy’s picking up a pen off his desk when he thinks of something else.

“Can anyone else see you?” Isabelle turns to him and looks something other than sad. Scared, she looks scared.

“Only one other person has been able to see me.” She gets a strange look on her face and says, “It was a long time ago.”

Tommy decides to not throw anything at her and instead gets up, avoiding stacks of paper, he walks around his desk to stand in front of her. He lifts a hand out and when she doesn’t move away touches her shoulder. Only he doesn’t. His hand goes right through her, and it’s like putting his hand in a bucket of cool water. He pulls back and she’s watching him. “I’ve been alone a long time.”

“What happened to you, Isabelle?”

Isabelle shakes her head. “You will found out soon enough,” she tells him and walks out through a wall.

“That is not helpful,” Tommy yells at the wall. “Son of a bitch!”

Part Two

Drabble

2010-09-27T14:55:37Z

Just a porny Adam/Tommy drabble.
~500 words, adult

Turn Around

They never do this, alright they’ve never done this, but when you’re still high from performing for ten thousand screaming fans, you don’t need a reason or an excuse. You need to get off.

“Shit, just,” Adam bats Tommy’s hand away from his crotch then drops onto his knees in front of him and starts attaching his zipper.

“Fuck.” It comes out garbled as Adam shoves his tight jeans down and fucking inhales his dick. Tommy spasms back against the dressing room door and thinks fuck it and reaches down and grabs Adam’s sweaty hair, pulling hard.

Adam doesn’t seem to mind, just pulls up then back down again, screwing his mouth down on Tommy’s dick until he hits the back of his throat and fucking swallows. Tommy groans loudly and Adam pulls back slowly up his dick. Tommy feels a sweet bite of pain as Adam’s teeth graze the underside off his cock and he comes with a surprise, spine jerking hard. The pleasure’s sharp and so intense it makes his vision go fuzzy.

He comes back to himself to find Adam on his feet in front of him, licking his lips with come sticking to his chin.

“Sorry,” he reaches up, wipes at the come and then leans up and kisses him. Adam tastes like him, thick and slightly bitter and Tommy cleans the taste of it out of his mouth. Adam makes a low moan into the kiss and Tommy reaches down, meeting Adam’s hand on the way, and they get Adam’s cock out, jerking it together. Adam breaks the kiss with a low whine, hand over Tommy’s, showing him what he likes.

He likes it hard and fast and Tommy takes control as Adam leans down, bites at his neck and shoulder. He comes with a chocked off groan, jerking in Tommy’s hand and wetness coats his fingers. Tommy jerks him through it until Adam flinches back, too sensitive.

Adam pulls back from him and smiles lazily down at him and Tommy can’t help but smile back in response.

“I have jizz on my hand,” he brings his hand up and waves it in Adam’s face. Adam catches it and slides one of his fingers into his mouth. Tommy loses coherent speech.

Adam pops it out again then proceeds to clean all his fingers and when he’s done, says, “Now you don’t,” with a smug grin on his face.

“Uh huh,” Tommy clears his throat and tries again. “That umm… we should,” okay he doesn’t try so much as fails.

Adam throws his head back and laughs, “You’re cute Tommy Joe.” He looks back down and voice gone rough says, “Come on, let’s get cleaned up.”

Tommy looks down and pulls his pants up and zips, then wipes his hands on the back of his jeans. He looks a mess, but it will have to do until he gets on the bus. He’s just turning to go out the door when he stops and looks back at Adam. “I want to do that again. Could I, uh maybe stay on your bus tonight?”

Adam looks surprised but then smiles and he’s gorgeous. “Yes,” he says. Then shakes his head as he adds, “But I don’t share my pillow, bitch.”

Tommy just grins.

shadowfaxy @ 2010-09-26T07:01:00

2010-09-26T11:01:47Z

Title: Take You There
Pairing: Adam/Terrance
Rating: NC-17
WC:~1200
Disclaimer: Just my fevered imagination.
Notes: No plot, just porn ;)

Take You There

Terrance meant it when he said they were like brothers, because sometimes, well, sometimes you have to help a brother out. And right now? He really wasn’t minding it one bit.

“Fuck, I can’t believe you’re doing this,” Adam gasps down at him. He doesn’t reply because he’s to busy with his mouth full of dick. He hums his agreement around Adam’s cock, sliding back up it and then sucking hard on the head. Adam jerks into him and he brings a hand to Adam’s hip, leaving a smeared trail of glitter as he grips him hard to stop him from moving.

It was just after a show and Terrance had taken the problem at hand into his mouth. Literally. Because Adam needed some relief or he was going to drive the dancers, band and fucking crew mad with his anal retentive control and his snippy bi-polar disposition he had recently acquired. So Terrance took one for the team, so to speak.

Adam starts mumbling shit down at him, practically begging him to keep going, and if he’s this far gone over a blowjob, then he needs something else, something more.

Terrance pulls completely off his cock and Adam fucking sobs, a low keening sound that goes straight to Terrance’s dick as Adam tries to follow him. Terrance wipes his mouth on the back of his hand and says, “Get on the bed.”

Adam doesn’t seem to understand but gets with it when Terrance gets up and drags him across the hotel room to the bed. He pushes him down hard on his back and stands over him. “Get your clothes off,” he tells him, voice hard and with no room for questioning.

Adam stares up at him, eyes blown wide and glossy with arousal, before he jerks up a little and starts doing as he’s told.

Terrance takes his shirt off then watches Adam struggle out of his necklaces before giving up on them and ripping the shirt over his head. Terrance pulls lube and condoms out of his back pocket and Adam’s eyes go wide when he sees them.

“I… you,” Adam swallows and tries again. “You don’t have to do this. I…”

But whatever he was going to say gets lost. “Shut up,” Terrance tells him and sees him try to suppress a shiver.

“Terrance,” Adam says slightly exasperated, “I know I’ve…”

But is cut off again as Terrance pushes him down roughly and straddles him, knees on either side of his hips and says sharply, “I said shut up.”

Adam sucks in a breath and slowly lets it out. “Okay,” he says, voice heavy.

Terrance grins wickedly down at him and grinds their crotches together, both still in their pants. Adam moans softly and thrusts up against him, making them both shudder.

“Alright, pants off,” Terrance says and pulls off of him, leaving the condoms on the bed beside them and picking up the lube bottle. Adam wiggles and jerks out of his pants until he’s completely naked and straining wetly against his stomach. Terrance bends down and grabs a toned thigh and pulls them apart, spreading him. He slides in between them and uncaps the bottle, squirting plenty of lube onto his fingers.

He leans down as Adam gets up on his elbows, watching him. He bites at Adam’s thigh, can’t help himself, and sucks and licks a trail, biting at his inner thigh where it meets the curve of his ass. Adam’s breathing deep above him and lets out a small moan when Terrance’s wet finger glides across his hole. Terrance slips a finger into him then circles around his rim, stretching him open before pushing another finger inside.

Adam’s moaning continuously and jerking into his hand. Terrance looks up at him and sees he’s got his eyes closed, bottom lip between his teeth. He forces his fingers deeper, stretching and looking for that sweet spot. He finds it with a twist of his fingers for Adam groans loudly and really starts fucking down onto his hand. Terrance adds a third finger and lets Adam ride his hand until he’s babbling again, cock jerking against his stomach.

“Fuck, please,” Adam looks down at him, eyes wild. “Terrance, please. I need…” Adam cuts off on a curse and then babbles again, sweat dripping down his face. “Fuck me. Oh God, fuck me now.”

Terrance pulls out with a small squelching sound and gets his pants down and a condom on in record time. He pours some more lube on his fingers and slicks it down over his cock in a few jerks. He grabs Adam’s thigh again, who meows up at him, hands clutching onto the bed spread. Terrance slides in faster then he means to, but Adam’s not cooperating and he bears down on his dick hard, like he’s dying for it.

“Damn,” Terrance says down at him, stopping fully sheathed. “Who knew you were such a cockslut.”

He hears what appears to be a muttered, “fuck you,” before Adam reaches down and grabs his hips, pushing on them. “Move,” Adam tells him harshly and slightly desperate.

Terrance chuckles a little and does what he’s told, hips snapping as he starts pounding into Adam, who looks blissed out on the bed in front of him and just fucking takes what Terrance is giving him.

Terrence’s rhythm stutters as Adam’s legs come up to wrap around him and he slips in a little deeper, feeling Adam tighten on every inch of his cock and he swears, starting to lose it already.

Adam brings a hand to his own cock and barley moves it before he’s tightening down hard on Terrance again, coming suddenly with a yell as wetness slicks their already sweat covered stomachs. Terrance fucks down hard into that tight heat and comes too, pleasure hitting him like a freight train, his muscles tensing before he falls down roughly onto Adam.

They get their breathing back under control and stay like that for a while, neither of them seemingly wanting to move. Terrance eventually lifts up, feeling cold and vaguely gross as come sticks to them, already drying. Terrance looks up at Adam’s face and sees that he’s fallen asleep and has to cover his mouth to stifle a laugh.

Terrance pulls out and gets a sleepy grimace out of Adam before it evens out and he breathes deeply in his sleep.

Terrance goes to the bathroom and cleans up, coming out and running a warm rag over Adam, who doesn’t even twitch. When he’s done cleaning him he throws the rag in the direction of the bathroom and tries to stir Adam to move him up the bed and under the covers. He awakens a little and obeys him weirdly, like he’s drugged, and Terrance moves a pliant Adam under the covers who just grabs at him vaguely before falling soundlessly back to sleep.

“Shit, “Terrance whispers to him, “If I had known I just had to fuck you to get you to listen to me I would have done it a long time ago.” Adam just snuggles closer to him. “Puts a whole new meaning to the saying fucked senseless.” Terrance smiles and runs a hand through Adam’s messy hair before sliding into bed beside him.

shadowfaxy @ 2010-09-25T03:46:00

2010-09-25T07:46:27Z

Title: Silly Menage a Trois
Pairing: Adam/Tommy/Brad
Rating: NC- 17
WC: ~1600
Notes: Written for aianonlovefest with the prompt: Cheeks/Tommy. Adam hosts a party or maybe it's the after party of the Glam Nation LA concert - either way, there are drinking games and Cheeks and Tommy have to make out and/or one has to give the other a blowjob. Bonus for voyeur!Adam.

Silly Menage a Trois

Adam is currently sitting in the VIP room watching his ex-boyfriend and bassist giggle like school children while playing some unknown drinking game that evolves lots of vodka shots.

Adam had performed tonight to a sold out show and afterwards, high on adrenaline and excitement, he’d invited everyone on his tour and close LA friends to go out and party with him.

They had all wound up at this awesome new club that had an underwater theme going on with bubbles floating all around and Adam should be having the time of his life. Except, he wasn’t. He had been restless, uneasy in his own skin all night and he had no idea why only that it was pissing him off.

So he was glad when it had gotten late enough for everyone to have gone back to the buses or home so that he could brood and sip his wine alone. Only not alone, because these two buffoons seemed to be going for an all-nighter.

The room they’re in is blue and looks like it belongs to a mermaid, with shells and starfish hanging everywhere as a round blue leather couch circles the whole room. There is even a glass coffee table in the middle that has real goldfish encased at the bottom of it.

Brad and Tommy are squished together in the middle of the couch and as he watches he sees Brad cuddle right up to Tommy, practically in his lap. Tommy doesn’t seem to mind, good friends since they'd first met months ago. And if you’re going to be friends with Brad, you have to know he’s a very friendly, cuddly drunk and will hug anyone in his vicinity. He’d even hugged a vaguely human looking tree once. Adam still had pictures.

Tommy’s and Brad’s close friendship had surprised him a little at first, because Brad is a puppy, an overenthusiastic puppy but a puppy none the less. He is also smart and the most compassionate person Adam’s ever met. Tommy, on the other hand is more laid back, though prone to busts of excitement. He is also self-proclaimed straight but not narrow and sometimes when Adam catches him looking he thinks if he ever initiated something Tommy wouldn’t say no.

“Have you ever argued politics with Neil?” Adam over hears a grinning Brad ask Tommy.

“No, that’s suicide,” Tommy replies to him reaching over to the fish coffee table and downing a shot.

“I have. It was delightful. He only told me to kill myself with fire four times,” Brad says this like it’s an accomplishment.

Oh, that’s what they’re playing. Great, they really are going to be here all night and while Adam usually loves this game he’s not in the mood tonight.

Adam sees Tommy look over at him then back at Brad and smile impishly.

“Have you ever kissed Adam on national television with millions of people watching?” Tommy asks Brad.

Brad pouts but takes a shot and then looks thoughtfully over at Adam. Oh no, this was not going to be good. Adam drains the last of his wine and sits up in his seat at the end of the couch.

“Have you ever kissed Adam while he fucked you?” Brad asks Tommy all the while looking at Adam.

And normally Adam would laugh and tell him to shut up, but he is cranky and irritable and this is not helping. So he thinks it’s time for him to bugger off and let them have their fun in peace. He gets up and goes over to them before Tommy has a chance to say anything.

“Hey, I’m heading out. I’ll see you guys tomorrow,” he tells them a little tense.

He bends down to gave Tommy a chaste kiss on the lips goodbye and then leans over to do the same to Brad. Except Brad brings a hand up to his neck and holds him in place as he kisses him for real. Tongue pushing into Adam’s mouth, he kisses him passionately like he knows all of Adam’s weaknesses. And damn it, he does. Brad knows his top three favorite things in life are singing, orgasms, and kissing. Adam gives in for a minute, kissing back and Brad's a lot less drunk than he thought to still be this coordinated. He pulls back with an exasperated, “Brad,” before looking over and seeing the look on Tommy’s face as he watches them.

It’s lust, pure and simple and what the hell is going on. “Tommy?” It’s a question. Brad answers for him.

“Stay,” he says like that answers everything. Then he slips out from under Adam and stands in front of Tommy who spreads his thighs in invitation. Adam sucks in a breath as Brad kneels in front of Tommy. Oh God, what were they doing?

“What the fuck are you doing?” he ask and walks to the door. He stops and looks back at Tommy who stares right back at him. Brad starts unbuttoning Tommy’s fly then stops, turns around and looks at Adam too. He sighs when he sees the look on Adam’s face and getting up he walks toward him.

“Adam, you’ve been tense and miserable all night. Let go. Let us help you,” he tells him sincerely. Tommy gets up too and comes up behind Brad, hugging him back into himself.

“Stay,” Tommy tells him too, head on Brad’s shoulder. “I know you’ve been under a lot of pressure lately but man, you got to let loose. Let someone else take charge for a while.”

And that, that was the nail on the head. Adam had been so busy worrying about his tour, the media and fan expectations and everything else this last year had thrown at him that he had forgotten how to let go, to not be the responsible one for once.

“Fuck,” Adam says with feeling then turns around and locks the door. Damn him and his weakness for sparkly pretty boys. They are going to be his down fall, he just knows it. Fuck, he’ll worry about it when a sex tape leaks.

Brad smiles at him then walks forward and pulls him to where he’d been sitting most the night.

“Watch,” he tells him. “And relax.”

Then he goes back to Tommy and pushes him back down in the middle of the couch where Adam can see everything. Brad slides back down in front of Tommy and opens his jeans pulling them off as Tommy lifts his hips, but leaving his black boxers on. Brad, griping Tommy’s thighs, mouths him through his underwear, then up and down his length as Tommy gets hard. And shit, Brad’s going to tease the fuck out of them both.

Adam shifts in his seat as Tommy moans faintly and grips the back of the couch. Brad sucks and mouths at Tommy’s underwear, getting it soaked and making Tommy shake above him.

Then finally, he drags Tommy’s underwear down until his cock springs free and starts licking it from root to tip. Tommy looks over at Adam then closes his eyes as Brad sucks him in, swallowing him all the way down. Brad keeps doing it, sliding up and down, lips dragging and cheeks hollowing against Tommy’s cock.

Adam groans at the sight then unbuttons and unzips giving his dick room to breathe but doesn’t touch himself.

Tommy looks close, hips thrusting up into Brad’s mouth. Brad let’s him, moving in time with his thrusts. Then Tommy cries out, hips faltering as he comes. Brad swallows it down then pulls off, lips shiny red and works Tommy the rest of the way through it with his hand. Tommy makes a keening sound and he’s done for, head thrown back as he comes down.

Brad gets up and rushes over to Adam and falls down into his lap, kissing him hard. Adam tastes Tommy on Brad’s tongue and groans trying to eat the taste out of his mouth until he can only taste Brad again, tongue searching his mouth for more. Adam pulls back, breathing heavily, and jerkily tries to get Brad out of his pants until Brad helps him then hurrying they do the same to Adam. When their cocks are free Brad thrusts down and their cocks slide together. It feels amazing and they groan in unison as Adam wraps a hand around them giving Brad something to thrust down into.

Adam hears a creak and then Tommy’s beside him and kissing him and Adam’s about to come all over himself. Tommy pulls away and Brad kisses him, cock still gliding down against his. Tommy leans down and bites at Adam's collarbone while running a hand down his chest until he finds his pierced nipple and tugs on it gently. It’s still kind of new so it hurts but Adam feels a snake of pleasure run down his belly and he comes all over Brad and himself.

Brad whines and thrusts harder into the slick Adam just made before coming himself adding to the wetness. They both slump down, like their strings have been cut and pant against each others mouths in a sloppy kiss.

Tommy moves away but comes back with crumpled napkins to help them clean up. They do the best they can before tucking themselves back in. Brad gets off him and throws the napkins away in the trash by the door.

“Hey,” he says to a sleepy looking Adam. “Let’s get you home.”

Which makes Adam picture them in a giant puppy pile, wrapped around each other on his bed and he wants it desperately.

“Stay the night with me,” he says to them both, looking back at Tommy. Tommy just smiles at him like he’s stupid.

“Of course,” Tommy tells him. “Where else would we go?”

Brad takes his hand and asks, “Are you ready?”

And yeah, Adam’s more than ready and takes Tommy’s hand as they leave.

shadowfaxy @ 2010-09-25T02:40:00

2010-09-25T06:40:50Z

Title: We all Fall Down
Pairing: Adam/Kris
Rating: NC-17
WC: ~2000
Notes: Also written for aianonlovefest with the prompt: A very shy Kris Allen go's to the library three or four day's a week to "study" but realy to crush over the very sexy head librarin Adam Lambert.But what Kris does not know is that Adam has some very sexy plans in store for Kris when Adam finds Kris asleep in the library after the library has closed.

We all Fall Down

Kris is exhausted and he slumps down in his favorite library chair. Between finding time for his classes, his job and his new found hobby as a stalker, he’s forgotten what sleep actually feels like.

Not that he is actually stalking someone. He just knows what time, late at night, when a certain librarian comes into work. And if he just happens to be there too, well, then that’s just coincidence. Oh fine, he’s totally stalking the guy but in his defense he isn’t hurting anyone and the guy’s smoking hot.

His name is Adam Lambert and he has jet black hair and depending on the day it’s either up or down or sideways and, sometimes it has streaks of color in it. And he has these bright blue eyes usually lined in black and he’s tall with broad shoulders and Kris might want to climb him like a tree. In conclusion he’s perfect. And weird. He’s perfect and weird and Kris has had a giant crush on him for weeks.

Kris yawns and puts his head down on his books spread out before him. He might as well take a nap. Adam doesn’t come in for another twenty minutes and yes, he knows it’s kind of creepy that he knows that. It doesn’t matter, he thinks bitterly, because he’s way to chicken shit to do anything anyway. With his crumpled clothes, plaid jacket and beat up sneakers, there is no way in hell he would have a chance with someone like Adam. That depressing thought sends him off to sleep.

Kris groggily climbs his way out of sleep by someone insistently poking him.

“Wakey, wakey, eggs and bakey,” he hears before ungluing his eyes and lifting his head up. He’s still in the library but it’s dark, most the lights turned out with everyone gone. Except, he looks across from him and sitting in the seat opposite him is none other than Adam Lambert. The person he stalks. He was also smiling at him.

Kris runs a hand through his hair. “What time is it?” he asks, voice rough with sleep.

“Late, really late. We closed a half hour ago,” Adam tells him like staying late after work is the best thing ever.

“Oh God,” Kris looks at him more coherently. “Why didn’t you wake me up sooner?”

Adam grins at him, all peppy like. “I couldn’t. You just looked so cute sleeping there all peacefully.”

Kris stutters at him, at a loss for words, “umm, t-thank you?” He says it questionably.

Adam throws his head back and laughs. And oh wow, neck. Kris traces it with his eyes.

Adam looks at him, still grinning. “You’re adorable.” Kris looks down and blushes, he can’t believe Adam‘s flirting with him. Then Adam ruins it.

“And I know you’ve been stalking me,” he tells Kris pleasantly, like they’re talking about the weather.

Kris stutters again, panicked this time. “ W-what? No, I just work late a lot…”

Adam speaks over his babble. “No, no, denial is not cute and I’ve already decided to be flattered by it.” Adam leans over the table at him. “But you forgot to introduce yourself. Something like ‘Hi my name is.” He looks over at Kris expectantly.

“Kris Allen,” he tells Adam softly.

“ Kris? Short for?” Adam inquires.

“Kristopher.” He adds, ”With a K.”

“Ah, okay. So like you say ‘Hi I’m Kris with a K’ then you could have run away and it wouldn’t be considered stalking.” Adam says this all thoughtfully.

“Unless you’re the kind that waits till I’m alone after work and drags me to your shady white van.” Then Adam asks him, weirdly hopeful, “You’re not going to kidnap me are you?”

“What. No, no. I’m not…” But Adam has already burst out laughing. Kris doesn’t get it until he tries to picture himself dragging Adam anywhere. Yeah, that’s not going to happen and he starts laughing too.

“I’m not stalking you,” he tells a still chuckling Adam. “I’m just admiring the libraries assets.” He grins at Adam. “All of the libraries assets,” Kris tells him pointedly.

“Ah, is that all you’re going to do. Admire?” Adam lowers his voice seductively. “You don’t want to check anything out?”

Kris swallows hard. “Maybe, I would have to see what I’m checking out. You know, to make sure I want it,” Kris says this softly but with a small smile.

Adam stares at him for a minute then gets up and rounds the table to where Kris is sitting. He holds out his hand and raises an eyebrow, a little challenging. Kris takes a deep breath and takes Adam’s hand.

Adam leads him past stacks and shelves of books until he evidently finds what he’s looking for because he presses Kris back into a bookshelf. He leans down slowly, giving time for Kris to protest before he kisses him. He kisses him gently, slowly exploring his lips and mouth. Kris opens for him, tongue meeting his and the kiss turns passionate. Adam controls the kiss, tongue plunging into him over and over until Kris is hard and aching. Adam pulls back and they pant against each others mouths.

“Can I fuck you?” Adam asks him, all soft and sweet.

Kris almost swallows his tongue. “Yes,” he gets out. “B-but I don’t have anything.”

“I got it covered.” And like a magical gay fairy he pulls a small bottle of lube and a line of condoms out of his pocket.

“Fuck,” Kris says looking at them. “You planed this didn’t you?”

Adam shrugs. “You were sleeping. My car was outside,” Adam tells him. “I was hoping.”

“I see you’re a boy scout,” Kris says. “But what took you so long?”

“I like to keep our patrons coming back for more,” he says with another shrug.

Then with a devious smile he flips Kris around until he's pressed face first into the bookshelf. Adam puts the lube and condoms on the shelf next to his head and lifts his plaid jacket off him, leaving him in a plain white t-shirt. Adam pulls Kris’s hands up above his head and tells him to grab the shelf then slides his hands back down him and starts unbuckling his pants.

Kris gasps at the first touch of Adam's hand, a gentle stoke, feeling him before he pulls his jeans and underwear all the way down. Adam reaches down and takes off his shoes and socks before tugging his pants and boxers the rest of the way off. Now Kris is naked from the waist down and yeah, he doesn’t feel vulnerable at all.

Then Adam’s pulled tight behind him and Kris can feel his hard dick pressed into the small of his back through his clothes. Adam grinds against him a little and oh God, little Adam is not so little. Then Adam’s reaching up, grabs the bottle of lube and kneels behind him. And oh Jesus, what was he doing.

“Adam?” he asks a little hesitantly.

“Shh, I just like to see what I’m doing,” he tells him, grabbing his ass cheeks. Kris shudders at the imagery and tries not to come before Adam even touches him. Kris hears the snick of the lube bottle opening before Adam spreads him and drags a finger over his hole.

Kris flinches away. “Cold,” he reprimands.

He gets a muttered apology then Adam’s blowing against his hole as he slips a finger inside. Kris shivers and makes a low moan as Adam pushes in and out, finger dragging inside him oh so sweetly, and Kris wants another.

“More,” he tells Adam. He hears Adam’s heavy breathing then there’s two fingers inside him, moving and stretching him. Then Adam hits his prostate and that’s it. Kris needs to be fucked hard and now.

“Now,” Kris demands on a drawn out moan as sparks fly behind his eyes. “Fuck me now.”

Adam groans but gets up and grabs the condoms beside him and Kris hears him hurry out of his jeans. Kris waits, excepting him to start when he’s ready. But Adam turns him around and kisses him hard, before pulling back and picking him up like he weighs nothing.

“Wrap your legs around me,” he says and Kris gets with the program, doing as he says.

“Now grab the shelf behind you,” Adam tells him. ”It’s okay. I got you.”

Kris leans back and grips the shelf above him as Adam holds his hips and lines them up until Kris feels Adam’s cock nudging his hole. Adam pushes in slowly, making Kris feel every inch of him and sweet Mother of God, he’s big. Kris feels the burn and stretch until Adam bottoms out and stops. Kris breathes shallowly, getting use to the feel. He tightens down on Adam’s cock making him moan loudly and readjust his grip. Kris moves experimentally and when he can’t take it any longer, slowly moves up and back down on Adam’s cock.

Adam pants at him. “Shit,” he says before helping Kris move up and down his length. Kris fucking himself on Adam’s dick. It feels fucking fantastic and Kris picks up speed. He’s sweating now, grip slipping on the shelf and he needs Adams’ help.

“Adam,” he whines.

And Adam must get it because he holds Kris still and thrusts up hard into him. Kris’s breath rushes out as he holds on for dear life as Adam plows into him, shaking the shelf and knocking off books all around them. Kris feels his orgasm build and he knows he’s going to come without anyone touching his cock as Adam fucks him fast, pressing into his prostrate on every thrust. Kris’s orgasm hits hard, cock spurting all over his stomach and shirt. He cries out as he clenches down around Adam who thrusts turn sporadic as he comes too, mouth open silently as a look of pleasure washes over his face. Kris collapses against the bookshelf, it and Adam the only thing holding him up. Adam stops moving and slumps onto him for a couple of minutes before gently pulling out.

Kris unwraps his legs from around him and Adam sets him back on his feet. He realizes his legs won’t hold him so he falls down onto his knees, trying to keep his ass off the ground. Adam tries to catch him but he’s to slow and yes, his knees are going to bruise later.

Adam laughs softly at him. “Stay here,” he tells him, picking up his jeans and walking away. Like Kris can actually move. He looks down at his soiled shirt and makes a face. He takes it off and cleans himself up with it. Kris looks over at his cloths in a pile, covered in books and wonders if he can reach them. He finally crawls over and gets dressed. He’s buttoning up his jacket, still on the floor, when Adam comes back dressed and cleaned up too.

“Hey,” Adam says to him then falls into his lap, knees on either side of Kris’s stretched out legs.

“Hi,” Kris says stupidly back to him. Kris kisses him slow, just tasting him before pulling back. “You going to pick these up?” he asks Adam looking at all the knocked down books.

“No, someone else can do it in the morning. They’ll think it was a small earthquake.” Adam tells him while giving him small kisses all over his face.

“Uh huh, a small, pleasurable earthquake,” Kris says with a smile. Then he sees a cover of a book that fell down. “Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction,” Kris reads and gives Adam a look.

“What? I thought it would be ironic,” Adam tells him with a grin.

Kris laughs at him and kisses him again because he can. Yes, he’s perfect and weird and Kris got to climb him.

“So,” Kris pulls back and asks, “Would you like to go on a date with me?”

“God, I thought you would never ask,” Adam smiles at him. “But I’d love to.”

Adam gets up and pulls Kris after him. “Come on. Let’s get you home.” And yes, Kris could sleep for a week, preferably with Adam.

Fic

2010-09-24T13:03:53Z

I've decided to round up all my fics that I've posted at various places and post them to my journal so they're all in one spot. They're all unbetaed and my first foray into fic writing.

Title: Bring Me to My Knees
Pairing: Adam/Tommy
Rating: NC-17
WC: ~3200
Notes: This was written for aianonlovefest with the prompt: Monte is called back home for some non angsty reason and Tommy's plays lead guitar. Adam gets so turned on throughout the entire concert that right when it ends he takes Tommy backstage and fucks him. It vaguely resembles that.

Bring Me to My Knees

“So you know, by the end of this tour I’m going to be giving you a blowjob on stage.”

Tommy was sitting with Adam on the big pull-out bed in what they had come to term as ‘Adam’s Lair’ at the back of the bus.

Only Cam and LP were on the band’s bus and were currently getting over a nasty cold. Monte had left a week ago to spend time with his newborn babies and they really couldn’t afford Tommy getting sick. So of course, Adam had invited him to sleep over with him and because Tommy is prone to getting nasty unable to move kind of colds, he had jumped at the offer.

Adam snorts at him. “Is that right? Are my pants on or off for this?” Adam smirks at him, “I already did that once besides I don’t just want to be known for my stage gay.”

Tommy leans back against the back of the bed and watches as Adam plays with his phone. He never turns that damn thing off. “Come on, we’ve got like 68 shows left and with just a lean here and there it’s going to get boring.”

Adam looks up sharply. “Did you just call my show boring."

“Of course not,” Tommy placates. He did not like the look on Adam’s face. “But you know what I mean. We can spice it up every now and then. Leave the fans guessing.”

When Adam looks more thoughtful than murderous Tommy breathes a sigh of relief. Apparently boring was to Adam what chicken was to Marty McFly.

“I guess we can spice it up a little but it’s not anything everybody hasn’t already seen before.” Adam looks him up and down, tattered pjs and all, then smiles. “I could always bend you over something for the encore, have my way with that tiny ass of yours.”

Tommy chokes on his spit and starts coughing. Adam continues to grin at him then bursts out laughing. Once Tommy catches his breathe he joins him. “T-that would get people’s attention,” Tommy says still laughing. “But we might get arrested for public indecency.”

“That’s what you’re worried about,” Adam shoots him an incredulous look. “Not me fucking you in the ass? What kind of straight boy are you?”

“Hey, you know me. I’ll do anything for a good show. I’m… versatile.” Tommy smiles at him.

Adam looks at him strangely. “Tommy, you don’t have to do anything at all. That kiss didn’t mean stage gay is part of your job description now.” Adam looks at him like he should know this already.

Tommy laughs and jokes, “I know that. But your fans did buy me my new laptop, probably should keep them happy."

Which was the wrong thing to say. Really wrong. Shit.

Adam’s head jerks up and he stares at him. “ You really didn’t just say that.”

“I just mean…” But Adam cuts him off.

“That you act gay on stage so my fans will buy you shit.” And wow, Adam was scary when mad.

“No, I meant that your fans like it when we do shit. And if they’re happy then everyone’s happy,” Tommy winces. Fuck, this was not coming out right.

Adam seemed to think so too because he just glares at him. “Uh huh, and maybe if I act straight I would have more fans that could buy you shit. Then everybody would really be happy, right?”

Fuck. This was bad. How in the hell did this happen.

“Adam, that’s not what I meant. I’m not doing this so your…” But Adam wasn’t listening. He had already gotten up and started getting ready for bed.

“I’m tired and have a lot to do tomorrow,” Adam tells him as he plugs in his cell phone to charge.

“Adam.”

“Night, Tommy.”

Tommy looks at him dejectedly as Adam climbs into bed and turns out the light.

___________________

The next day was absolute shit for Tommy. They had a show tomorrow and had stopped at a hotel because Adam had interviews most the day but was there for rehearsal. He was also ignoring Tommy to such an extent that even LP, who was drugged up on cough syrup, was giving him weird looks.

Every time Tommy tried to catch Adam’s eye he would just move away or act like he couldn’t see him. Apparently, Adam could be a stubborn little bitch. And it was annoying.

By the end of the day Tommy was so frustrated that he goes to his room and drinks away his sorrows. After the fourth tiny vodka bottle he isn’t feeling any better. He then decides that he really doesn’t like Adam mad at him. At all.

He empties a fifth bottle but still feels like shit. He thinks of how Adam is always happy and laughing. And how when he walks into a room, it was like he’s a black hole that sucks everyone’s attention to him. How he seems to thrive by being around the band or his dancers. People he cares for, loves.

Son of a bitch. He was drunk and waxing poetry about his boss. Yeah, a boss that is nice and funny and has awesome hair and is really hot but… Oh God, he would totally go all the way gay for Adam.

Tommy drunkenly face plants into his bed and his last thought is of Adam’s freckly grin.

________________

The next morning is just as shitty as yesterday for Tommy only now he has a mad hangover to deal with too. Adam is still ignoring him except now he would also glare in his direction when he thought Tommy wasn’t looking.

It got so obvious that Sasha comes up to him and asks if he’s all right or if he was coming down with something. Tommy lies and tells her he’s just tired and takes it as a sign to hide in his room until it was time to get ready for the show.

When he can’t wait any longer he gets dressed and goes to find the rest of the band who look relieved when they see him and ask if he’s okay about a millions times.

“Yes, I’m fine. Really, just tired,” he tells Cam who looks better than she had in days. She also doesn’t believe a word he’s saying.

“Hey listen, have you seen Adam?” Tommy asks her trying to escape.

She nods. “Yeah, he’s in his dressing room. Just walked that way.” She points to her left down a hallway.

“Thanks,” he tells her. “I’ll be right back.”

He walks down the hallway until he finds Adam’s door. He takes a deep breathe and knocks. He is going to make Adam listen to him or die trying. Or at least risk employment.

Adam opens the door, sees that it’s him and promptly slams it in his face. Let no one say that Adam Lambert doesn’t have a flare for the dramatics. Time to get dirty.

“Damn it, Adam. Open the door!” Tommy yells. When he doesn’t hear a response he bangs on the door. “Don’t make me call your mother! Come on, please open the door.” Silence. Then the door slowly opens and Adam glares at him which is still quite imitating even in his stage makeup.

“That’s a low blow even for you,” Adam tells him.

“I know,” says Tommy, although he’s immensely thankful that Adam’s a mamma’s boy. “Just let me in and hear what I have to say.” Tommy adds, “Please.”

“Alright, but make it quick,” Adam steps back and grudgingly and let’s Tommy in and shuts the door. Adam crosses his arms and stares at him expectantly.

“I’m sorry,” Tommy starts. “What I said was beyond stupid and I’m an idiot.”

Adam nods solemnly. “Go on.”

Tommy laughs at that. “I don’t act gay with you to get things from your fans, Adam. I do it because I want to and yeah okay, maybe I’m a little bit of an exhibitionist.” Tommy walks closer to Adam. “But mainly, I just really like doing it with you. Being close to you.”

Adam looks at him confused. “Tommy, we’re friends. You’re in my band. You really don’t have to do that stuff to be close to me.” Adam sighs and adds, “I didn’t really think you’re gay for pay but, what you said really rubbed me the wrong way. Just one too many straight guys egging on the gay guy, thinking it’s funny. It’s not.”

Wow, Adam sure can be dense when he wants to be. Tommy sighs and tries again. “Adam…" But because the world hates him he’s interrupted by a knock on the door.

“Yes,” Adam calls out.

“20 minutes, Adam.” It’s Lane.

“Shit, I’m not dressed,” Adam scurries around him and leather and lace go flying in every direction.

“Fuck, you gotta go get set. You’re forgiven, I love ya,. I’ll see you on stage,” Adam pushes him out the door.

Tommy goes and gets his guitar and walks toward the door that leads to the stage. He sees Cam and LP getting ready to go on and hurries to catch up. LP sees him and waits for him.

“Ready?” LP asks.

“As ever,” Tommy replies and with a fist bump they enter the stage.

__________________

Entering a stage to a couple of thousand screaming fan girls will never not get your heart pumping. Tommy hooks his guitar up and tries to remember how to breathe. The thrill and adrenaline of looking out into the crowd will never, ever get old. Tommy smiles and waves then the lights go out. Show time.

Watching Adam perform is like a roller coaster of emotions. He’s ridiculous and hilarious but somehow still sexy and sensual. His voice is so out of this world that it pulls you in and grabs you, so that you either have to dance in excitement or cry in amazement. In short, Adam puts on a fucking amazing show. And no one can keep their eyes off him. Tommy is no different.

Everything is going good, great even until Adam starts on Fever and that’s when Tommy breaks. Adam walks down the steps to lean on him. “There he goes, my baby walks so slow…” Adam sings to him. He keeps singing but Tommy is dismayed when he starts to walk away without even a hair pull. So desperate times call for desperate measures then.

Right as Adam walks by, Tommy reaches out and smacks him on the ass. Hard. Adam jumps a little but recovers quickly and shoots him a questioning look over his shoulder. Tommy just smiles. And the crowd, of course, goes ape shit.

Luckily that is all the encouragement Adam needed because every time they wander in each others direction they try to one up each other. There is some mild groping and Adam finally pulls Tommy around by his hair which is hotter then it has any right to be.

Then Sure Fire Winners turns into a grind fest and close to the end when Adam’s leaning against him again Tommy puts his head on his shoulder then leans up like he’s going to kiss him but instead licks up the side of Adam’s sweaty throat. Adam pulls back and looks at him with fire in his eyes before pushing him gently away to finish the song. The crowd screams louder then before which Tommy didn’t think was possible. He even thinks he hears a guy yell, “Get it, boy!” He also might be hearing things.

Things go normally at the beginning of If I Had You with Adam introducing the band and dancers. It’s not until the last verse of the song that Adam comes up behind Tommy and pulls him back against him while Tommy plays.

“The flashing and the stage,” Adam sings to him and the crowd. He rocks his hips into Tommy and oh fuck, he is hard as a rock. Adam picks up a rhythm and they sway to it as he sings, “It might get me high.”
Adam uses his free hand and grabs Tommy’s head and brings it back against his chest, his throat in a long arc. Tommy tries to breathe and remember how to play the fucking guitar at the same time.

“But it don’t mean a thing tonight,” Adam wails then grinds his cock against the small of Tommy’s back before finally pushing away. Tommy stumbles a little but recovers smoothly as Adam belts out the chorus.

Tommy stares after him and lust hits him low in the belly as Adam saunters around seemingly not the least bit bothered to be sporting a giant hard on in front of a thousand people. And it really was giant. Huge really. And then Tommy fucks up the last notes of the song because he staring at Adam’s dick. Adam looks at him but the crowd seems to be to busy having a collective hernia from screaming so loud to notice.

The rest of the show turns into torture for Tommy. Adam stays away from him but sends him heated looks every now and then and he keeps having to rearrange his guitar because his dick stands to attention every time.

When it’s finally over, encore and all, Adam all but flees backstage while Tommy unplugs his guitar and follows him. LP meets him at the entrance and because he’s smarter then he looks takes Tommy’s guitar and says, “Go after him.”

Tommy doesn’t have to be told twice and runs after him down the hallway.

Adam’s in his dressing room with the door wide open. Tommy walks in and closes the door then locks it. Adam’s staring into the mirror but locks eyes with him as Tommy comes up behind him. Staring at him now Tommy as no idea what to say besides ‘I like it when you pull my hair, what do you think about pulling on my dick.’

Thankfully all that comes out is, “Adam.” It comes out pleading.

Adam turns around and closes the distance between them until they are just inches apart. “Tell me you mean it. Tell me this isn’t a game,” Adam says harshly. “Tell me.”

Tommy plasters himself against Adam and says, “It’s not. I promise it’s n…” But the last words are lost as Adam kisses him. Really kisses him this time, not like the showy, face eating one of the AMAs. He puts a hand on Tommy’s face and just takes control. He pushes his tongue against Tommy’s and kisses him until their mouths are swollen and they can’t breathe. Adam pulls them apart and moves his thumb over Tommy's bottom lip.

“Fuck, your mouth,” he says. Tommy looks at the heat in Adam’s eyes, all dark and blown wide. His breath catches.

“See, I told you I would end up giving you a blowjob.” Tommy reaches down and feels Adam’s dick through his pants. It’s just as huge and hard as it looks. Tommy squeezes it a little, getting the feel for it.

Adam gasps and when Tommy looks up again Adam’s eyes are closed. Tommy takes this as a sign to keep going but Adam pushes his hand away.

“No, we really don’t have enough time for me to teach you the art of cock sucking. And I really need a lot of time to enjoy the sight of your mouth wrapped around my cock,” Adam says to him with an evil grin.

“Shit,” Tommy breathes, dick jumping at the thought.

“Adam,” he complains when he goes to move away because shit, Adam is not going to leave him with blue balls.

“Hush, I got you,” Adam says as he pushes and manhandles him until he’s shoved up against the locked door.

Adam kneels down in front of him in one swift move and starts unbuckling Tommy’s pants.

“Oh, God,” Tommy all but moans.

Adam smirks up at him. “I didn’t say I couldn’t blow you.”

Adams gets his belt unbuckled and then pops the button to his jeans. Then slowly starts to unzip Tommy’s pants over his hard on. Once all the way down Adam grabs the flaps of Tommy’s jean and pulls them and his underwear down in one hard jerk..

Tommy gasps as his dick flies free and slaps against his stomach. It’s flushed red and leaking at the tip and Adam had better do something besides stare at it or Tommy was going to get violent. He must have made some type of noise because Adam looks up at him and says, “Pretty,” before sucking the head of Tommy’s cock into his mouth.

Tommy’s hips stutter but Adam brings his hands up to his hips and holds him in place while he licks and tongues under the head of his cock. Tommy bites his lip and tries not to thrust to much. Adam pulls back and tongues his slit, teasing him.

Tommy groans down at him. “No teasing, Adam, not fair.”

Adam huffs out a laugh but relents and swallows his cock all the way down. He pulls off and does it again as Tommy grabs a handful of his hair. He gets a rhythm going, all wet and tight heat that makes Tommy’s head bang against the door. Adam slides all the way down again and moans loudly around Tommy’s cock. Tommy feels the vibrations all the way up his spine and that’s it. Tommy arches and spasms against the door making it shake as he comes. Adam swallows around his cock making him see fucking stars.

When Tommy comes down Adam’s panting up at him, lips swollen and wet. Tommy smears his fingers across Adam’s mouth and says, “Jesus Fucking Christ.”

Adam smiles against Tommy’s fingers then shoots up and kisses him and Tommy tastes himself but it’s okay because he tastes good in Adam’s mouth.

Adam breaks the kiss and says, “No, my name’s Adam.” Tommy chuckles at that then realizes his pants are around his knees. He pulls them up and tucks himself back in, buttons and zips then reaches for Adam.

“So what can I do for you?” Tommy asks but when he goes for Adam’s crotch his hand is caught by Adam’s.

“I’m good,” Adam tells him. Tommy looks down and yes, there’s a questionably large wet spot on the front of Adam’s pants.

“Did you…” Tommy trails off. “Oh My God, that’s hot. Like really hot.” Tommy looks at him impressed.

Adam shrugs nonchalantly. “What can I say. I like blowjobs.”

Tommy chokes and starts laughing. “Yeah, me too.” Adam raises a eyebrow at him but then starts laughing too.

They’re still laughing when Lane yells through the door at Adam to hurry up, they have to leave soon. She doesn’t sound pleased.

“Alright, give me 15 minutes,” Adam yells back but looks down at his pants mournfully. “That’s going to stain.”

Tommy eyes his pants. “Yup, they are,” Tommy says. “Maybe, you can take them off next time.”

Adam grins at him. “Maybe.”

Tommy nods and turns to leave so Adam can clean up when Adam tells him, “Stay on my bus tonight. Cam and LP still look a little sick. Can’t be to careful.”

Tommy smiles so wide his mouth hurts. “Of course,” he says and walks out the door.