The Snark-O-Gator says...

Life and movies: the meme

2009-01-02T06:12:51Z

SUPPOSEDLY if you've seen over 85 movies, you have no life. Mark the ones you've seen. There are 254 movies on this list. Put x's next to the movies you've seen and add it up.3

(x) Rocky Horror Picture Show
(x) Grease
(x) Pirates of the Caribbean
( ) Pirates of the Caribbean 2: Dead Man's Chest
( ) Pirates of the Caribbean 3: At World's End
( ) Boondock Saints
(x) Fight Club
( ) Starsky and Hutch
(\) Neverending Story I've seen parts of it on TV, hence the spare and not the strike.
(\) Blazing Saddles
(x) Airplane
(x) The Princess Bride
( ) AnchorMan
(x) Napoleon Dynamite And I'll never get that hour of my life back...
(x) Labyrinth
( ) Saw
( ) Saw II
( ) White Noise
( ) White Oleander
( ) Anger Management
( ) 50 First Dates
(\?) The Princess Diaries I think I saw this on TV once. I was bored, and the TV was on...
( ) The Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement
( ) Scream
( ) Scream 2
( ) Scream 3
( ) Scary Movie
( ) Scary Movie 2
( ) Scary Movie 3
( ) Scary Movie 4
( ) American Pie
( ) American Pie 2
(x) American Wedding
( ) American Pie Band Camp
(x) Harry Potter 1
(x) Harry Potter 2
(x) Harry Potter 3
(x) Harry Potter 4
(x) Harry Potter 5
(\) Resident Evil 1
( ) Resident Evil 2
(x) The Wedding Singer I'm a sucker for Drew Barrymore.
( ) Little Black Book
( ) The Village
(x) Lilo & Stitch and the second one, and the TV show, and part of the third movie...
(x) Finding Nemo
( ) Finding Neverland
( ) Signs
( ) The Grinch
( ) Texas Chainsaw Massacre
( ) Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning
( ) White Chicks
( ) Butterfly Effect
( ) 13 Going on 30
(x) I, Robot Almost a decent movie, until the ending when the really unbelievable stuff happened. I know it was FICTION, but GEEZ!!!
( ) Robots
( ) Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story
( ) Universal Soldier
( ) Lemony Snicket: A Series Of Unfortunate Events
( ) Along Came Polly
(x) Deep Impact The only believable part of this movie was having Morgan Freeman as the president.
( ) KingPin
( ) Never Been Kissed
( ) Meet The Parents
( ) Meet the Fockers
( ) Eight Crazy Nights
( ) Joe Dirt
(x) KING KONG Not the original one, not the one with Jack Black, but the one that was on TV in the 80's.
( ) A Cinderella Story
( ) The Terminal
( ) The Lizzie McGuire Movie
( ) Passport to Paris
( ) Dumb & Dumber
( ) Dumber & Dumberer
( ) Final Destination
( ) Final Destination 2 You wouldn't think there'd be a sequel to a movie with the word 'FINAL' in the title.
( ) Final Destination 3
( ) Halloween
( ) The Ring
( ) The Ring 2
( ) Surviving X-MAS
(x) Flubber
(x ) Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle Funniest movie ever. Avoid the second one. So not funny, more like disgusting.
(x) Practical Magic
(x) Chicago Several words come to mind when I think of this movie. Boring is one, stupid is another.
( ) Ghost Ship
( ) From Hell
(x) Hellboy One of the better comic book adaptations. Excellent.
( ) Secret Window
( ) I Am Sam
( ) The Whole Nine Yards
( ) The Whole Ten Yards
( ) The Day After Tomorrow
( ) Child's Play
( ) Seed of Chucky
( ) Bride of Chucky
( ) Ten Things I Hate About You
( ) Just Married
( ) Gothika
( ) Nightmare on Elm Street
( ) Sixteen Candles
( ) The Breakfast Club
( ) Remember the Titans
( ) Coach Carter
( ) The Grudge
( ) The Grudge 2
( ) The Mask
( ) Son Of The Mask
( ) Bad Boys
( ) Bad Boys 2
( ) Joy Ride
( ) Lucky Number Sleven
(x) Ocean's Eleven
( ) Ocean's Twelve
(x) Bourne Identity They so mangled this story. The book was excellent. The movie? CRAP.
( ) Bourne Supremecy
( ) Bourne Ultimatum
( ) Lone Star
( ) Bedazzled
(x) Predator I
(x) Predator II
( ) The Fog
(x) Ice Age
( ) Ice Age 2: The Meltdown
( ) Curious George
(x) Independence Day
( ) Cujo
( ) A Bronx Tale
( ) Darkness Falls
( ) Christine
(x) ET
( ) Children of the Corn
( ) My Boss's Daughter
( ) Maid in Manhattan
(x) War of the Worlds The original. I don't watch movies with scientologists in them...
(x) Rush Hour
(x) Rush Hour 2
(x) Rush Hour 3
( ) Best Bet
( ) How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
( ) She's All That
( ) Calendar Girls
( ) Sideways
(X) Mars Attacks Mack mack! Mack mack mack mack!!!
(x) Event Horizon Creepy creepy creepy fucking movie.
(x) Ever After
(x) Wizard of Oz
(x) Forrest Gump What was the great big fuss about with this movie? If I wanted to spend time seeing people make fun of a retarded guy I go back to high school. And I won't get those 2 hours back either...
(x) Big Trouble in Little China
(x) The Terminator
(x) The Terminator 2
(\) The Terminator 3
(x) X-Men Could have been better.
(x) X2 Existed solely so they could make a third movie.
(x) X-3 Totally sucked. Glad I didn't waste money on it.
(x) Spider-Man Lame. Marvel killed any affection I had for Spidey by letting them make a movie...
( ) Spider-Man 2
( ) Sky High
( ) Jeepers Creepers
( ) Jeepers Creepers 2
(x) Catch Me If You Can Good movie. I normally despise Lenny, but this was good.
(x) The Little Mermaid
(x) Freaky Friday
(x) Reign of Fire What's not to like about this one. Matthew McConawhatsit, Christian Bale, Dragons and lot's of things that go BOOM!!!
( ) The Skulls
( ) Cruel Intentions
( ) Cruel Intentions 2
( ) The Hot Chick
( ) Shrek
( ) Shrek 2
( ) Swimfan
(x) Miracle on 34th street
( ) Old School
( ) The Notebook
( ) K-Pax
( ) Krippendorf's Tribe
( ) A Walk to Remember
( ) Ice Castles
( ) Boogeyman
( ) The 40-year-old-virgin
(x) Lord of the Rings Fellowship of the Ring Didn't suck nearly as bad as the book.
(x) Lord of the Rings The Two Towers For a movie with swords and monsters there was nowhere near enough swords being stuck IN monsters.
( ) Lord of the Rings Return Of the King
(x) Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark
(x) Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
(x) Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
(x) Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull What a waste of fucking time. Inca, Conquistadors and WTF!?! Aliens??!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
( ) Baseketball
( ) Hostel
( ) Waiting for Guffman
( ) House of 1000 Corpses
( ) Devils Rejects
( ) Elf
(x) Highlander
( ) Mothman Prophecies
(x) American History X
( ) Three
(x) The Jacket
(x) Kung Fu Hustle Not as good as Shao Lin Socker, but good...
(x) Shaolin Soccer
( ) Night Watch
(x) Monsters Inc.
(x) Titanic It was OK... But did we need to wait THREE FUCKING HOURS to see Kate Winslet naked???
(x) Monty Python and the Holy Grail
(x) Shaun Of the Dead
( ) Willard
( ) High Tension
( ) Club Dread
( ) Hulk
(x) Dawn Of the Dead
(x) Hook
( ) Chronicle Of Narnia The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe
(x) 28 days later
(x) Orgazmo
( ) Phantasm
( ) Waterworld
( ) Kill Bill vol 1
( ) Kill Bill vol 2
( ) Mortal Kombat
( ) Wolf Creek
( ) Kingdom of Heaven
( ) The Hills Have Eyes
( ) I Spit on Your Grave aka the Day of the Woman
( ) The Last House on the Left
( ) Re-Animator
(x) Army of Darkness "I'll rip out your soul!" "Come get a piece."
(x) Star Wars Ep. I The Phantom Menace
(x) Star Wars Ep. II Attack of the Clones
(x) Star Wars Ep. III Revenge of the Sith
(x) Star Wars Ep. IV A New Hope
(x) Star Wars Ep. V The Empire Strikes Back
(x) Star Wars Ep. VI Return of the Jedi
( ) Ewoks Caravan Of Courage
( ) Ewoks The Battle For Endor
(x) The Matrix
(x) The Matrix Reloaded This was crap.
(x) The Matrix Revolutions If the second one was crap, this was utter shit.
(x) Animatrix
( ) Evil Dead
( ) Evil Dead 2
(x) Team America: World Police
(x) Red Dragon Not the most recent one, but the one made in the '80s by "Miami Vice" producer Michael Mann
(x) Silence of the Lambs
( ) Hannibal The book was total crap. Why would I see the movie???

Total: 90

I have a life, I just have movies in it... Big freakin' deal...

Stupid

2008-11-11T02:38:46Z

Thought for today: You can't fix stupid. However, you can take stupid out behind the woodshed and beat him with a tire iron.

Brought to you by the letters D, U, M and B.

or...

"Remember kids, dumb spelled backwards is mud."

Why Kevin Smith is the Man...

2008-10-30T15:19:15Z

Once again, Kevin Smith reminds all of us why he rocks and we don't.

Kevin Smith interview on CNN about "Zack and Miri Make a Porno"

I know I'll go see the movie solely for the opportunity to see Jason Mewes in a sex scene.

zudacomics.com / High Moon...

2008-10-21T20:08:42Z

Been meaning to post this for a while. Actually, I've been meaning to post ANYTHING for a while...

After seeing the ads for DC Comics online web comic site zudacomics.com in various comics, I finally followed through and checked out their lineup. I like Zuda's concept, which is to every month run a contest of new submissions with the winner getting a contract to create comics for the site. All entries are judged by users, with the highest rated comic being the winner.

Zuda's flash based display for the comics is slick, allowing you to display each page in full screen, with no ads or other page elements to get between you and the comic. This to me is THE BEST feature of the whole site.

The best comic I've found on Zuda, and with the exception of Girl Genius the best I've seen on the internet, is High Moon. It's a gritty western meets werewolf story, with excellent artwork and layout. Think High Plains Drifter with fur and fangs. With new updates every Tuesday, High Moon has become one of my new must reads. I highly recommend it.

Happy anniversary to me

2008-08-01T01:40:56Z

In celebration of my 5 years with BCC, my employer sent me a catalog of gifts to choose from, like jewelry, googaws, doohickies and whatsits.

I was more stoked by the fact that they sent me a set of ring sizers so I could figure out what size to choose.

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2008-07-11T16:27:29Z

Ah crap! The electricity just went out. There goes the day of productive activity I had planned...

Big Read...

2008-07-05T23:15:08Z

The Big Read reckons that the average adult has only read 6 of the top 100 books they’ve printed.
1) Look at the list and bold those you have read.
2) Italicize those you started but did not finish.
3) Underline the books you LOVE.
4) Reprint this list in your own blog so we can try and track down these people who’ve read 6 and force books upon them.

1. Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen
2. The Lord of the Rings - JRR Tolkien - Oooh, the Gump Correlary strikes again! So many people over the years told me that I just HAD to read these books. I hated it. I kept waiting for the story to start, and by the time it did the book was over. I'd like these few hours of my life back, please.
3. Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte
4. Harry Potter series - JK Rowling
5. To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee
6. The Bible - I skipped ahead to the end to see how it all ended. EVERYONE dies.
7. Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte
8. Nineteen Eighty Four - George Orwell
9. His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman - Still haven't seen the movie...
10. Great Expectations - Charles Dickens
11. Little Women - Louisa M Alcott
12. Tess of the D'Urbervilles - Thomas Hardy
13. Catch 22 - Joseph Heller - This one is on the shelf, waiting to be read.
14. Complete Works of Shakespeare - Not all of them, but many of them.
15. Rebecca - Daphne Du Maurier
16. The Hobbit - JRR Tolkien
17. Birdsong - Sebastian Faulks
18. Catcher in the Rye - JD Salinger
19. The Time Traveller's Wife - Audrey Niffenegger
20. Middlemarch - George Eliot
21. Gone With The Wind - Margaret Mitchell
22. The Great Gatsby - F Scott Fitzgerald
23. Bleak House - Charles Dickens
24. War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy
25. The Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams
26. Brideshead Revisited - Evelyn Waugh
27. Crime and Punishment - Fyodor Dostoyevsky
28. Grapes of Wrath - John Steinbeck
29. Alice in Wonderland - Lewis Carroll
30. The Wind in the Willows - Kenneth Grahame
31. Anna Karenina - Leo Tolstoy
32. David Copperfield - Charles Dickens
33. Chronicles of Narnia - CS Lewis
34. Emma - Jane Austen
35. Persuasion - Jane Austen
36. The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe - CS Lewis
37. The Kite Runner - Khaled Hosseini
38. Captain Corelli's Mandolin - Louis De Bernieres
39. Memoirs of a Geisha - Arthur Golden
40. Winnie the Pooh -A.A. Milne
41. Animal Farm - George Orwell
42. The Da Vinci Code - Dan Brown
43. One Hundred Years of Solitude - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
44. A Prayer for Owen Meaney - John Irving
45. The Woman in White - Wilkie Collins
46. Anne of Green Gables - LM Montgomery
47. Far From The Madding Crowd - Thomas Hardy
48. The Handmaid's Tale - Margaret Atwood
49. Lord of the Flies - William Golding
50. Atonement - Ian McEwan
51. Life of Pi - Yann Martel
52. Dune - Frank Herbert - Read it, read it again, I'll read it again once I find my copy back...
53. Cold Comfort Farm - Stella Gibbons
54. Sense and Sensibility - Jane Austen
55. A Suitable Boy - Vikram Seth
56. The Shadow of the Wind - Carlos Ruiz Zafon
57. A Tale Of Two Cities - Charles Dickens
58. Brave New World - Aldous Huxley
59. The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time - Mark Haddon
60. Love In The Time Of Cholera - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
61. Of Mice and Men - John Steinbeck
62. Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov
63. The Secret History - Donna Tartt
64. The Lovely Bones - Alice Sebold
65. Count of Monte Cristo - Alexandre Dumas
66. On The Road - Jack Kerouac
67. Jude the Obscure - Thomas Hardy
68. Bridget Jones' Diary - Helen Fielding
69. Midnight's Children - Salman Rushdie
70. Moby Dick - Herman Melville
71. Oliver Twist - Charles Dickens
72. Dracula - Bram Stoker
73.The Secret Garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett
74. Notes From A Small Island - Bill Bryson
75. Ulysses - James Joyce
76. The Bell Jar - Sylvia Plath - This one is on a shelf somewhere as well...
77. Swallows and Amazons - Arthur Ransome
78. Germinal - Emile Zola
79. Vanity Fair - William Makepeace Thackeray
80. Possession - AS Byatt
81. A Christmas Carol - Charles Dickens
82. Cloud Atlas - David Mitchell
83. The Color Purple - Alice Walker
84. The Remains of the Day - Kazuo Ishiguro
85. Madame Bovary - Gustave Flaubert
86. A Fine Balance - Rohinton Mistry
87. Charlotte's Web - EB White
88. The Five People You Meet In Heaven - Mitch Albom
89. Adventures of Sherlock Holmes - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
90. The Faraway Tree Collection - Enid Blyton
91. Heart of Darkness - Joseph Conrad
92. The Little Prince - Antoine De Saint-Exupery (in the French)
93. The Wasp Factory - Iain Banks
94. Watership Down - Richard Adams
95. A Confederacy of Dunces - John Kennedy Toole
96. A Town Like Alice - Nevil Shute
97. The Three Musketeers - Alexandre Dumas
98. Hamlet - William Shakespeare - Wouldn't this be included in #14???
99. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - Roald Dahl
100. Les Miserables - Victor Hugo

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2008-07-02T10:38:11Z

This just in! Barack Obama has embraced the 'militant homosexual agenda'.
This is bad?

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2008-06-24T19:24:03Z

If'n I had me a calendar, I'd take me a big marker and write in big letters 'SUCKED' in the box for today.

On the Teevee

2008-06-22T15:36:02Z

Battlestar Galactica - Now that we've hit the mid-season finale, I'm left with an overwhelming sense of WTF?!?!?!?! But what did I expect?

Dr. Who - Best episode ever!!! Of course, we're nearing the end of the season so OF COURSE we have to have the really dramatic end of the world episodes. Next weeks looks great, with everyone who's ever hitched a ride with the doctor showing up. Can't wait...

the Venture Brothers - Just finally started watching this show, even though it's been recommended to me several times. A cartoon about super genius scientists and arch-villians? How could I not like this?!? Now I just need to see the first two episodes.

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2008-06-14T19:57:51Z

I setup a profile on Facebook today so I could lookup old girlfriends. I am so very lame...

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2008-06-13T20:39:36Z

However, if I had stayed in bed I never would have met this very nice fried ice cream that is trying very hard to cheer me up.

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2008-06-13T20:36:15Z

In general, I'm not superstitious. However, today was definitely Friday the 13th. I should have just stayed in bed...

WANT!!!

2008-06-05T03:05:24Z

I so want this

OMGWTFPETA?!?!?!?!?!?!

2008-06-02T18:54:35Z

Apparently, PETA stands for "People for the Erotic Treatment of Animals". It's a real ad, made by PETA, that TV stations won't touch. I wonder why.

Don't watch this at work, with your kids, or while eating.

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2008-06-02T12:24:08Z

Once again I scored the bonus bacon from the cafeteria. My breakfast, it is full of win.

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2008-06-01T21:59:49Z

Indy: on a scale of 'WTF?!?' to 'OMGSQUEE!!!1!' this movie was a 'meh'.

Smartest cat in the world

2008-05-17T03:59:54Z

Apparently my cat has learned how to communicate with humans. Unfortunately, she only speaks pun.

I went to clean out the litter box and found that she wanted to tell me that it was stinky by digging my P-Funk tshirt out of the dirty laundry and tossing it inside. Get it? Pee funk?

P-Funk. No shit. Well, a little shit. It is a litter box.

Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!

2008-05-01T17:09:06Z

http://graphjam.com/2008/04/23/song-chart-memes-use-a-dictionary-please/

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2008-04-08T11:23:57Z

Drat! Locked out of my own place of employment. Whatever shall i do?!?

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2008-04-02T09:46:21Z

I love my Dr. I'm the only patient who takes the drugs I take, so she gives me all of her samples when I see her. Six months of drugs free!

Dirty minds...

2008-03-26T01:32:55Z

On the way home today, the ATT van in front of me had a sticker that read "WWW.ATT.JOBS". I had completely forgotten that they had opened up that whole range of domains, and immediately began wondering if anyone had snatched up the really good ".jobs" domains.

Come on, I know you are thinking of them. You probably just thought up three.

The obvious one is an empty placeholder page.

The next one I thought of is taken, and I really wonder if they were thinking when they reserved the addy.

You can click this, it's work safe. www.rim.jobs

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2008-03-24T18:35:14Z

I'm not even supposed to be here today.

the Cult of Ignorance

2008-03-24T13:31:09Z

Excellent column from Kevin Horrigan in the Post Dispatch today about the rise of stupidity in America.

Text is behind the cut, the article can be found here

Early on in Robert Harris' new novel, "The Ghost," a literary editor says to an
author who ghost-writes celebrity memoirs, "Tell me. When did it become
fashionable to be stupid? That's the thing I don't understand. The cult of the
idiot. The elevation of the moron."

I worried about this question last week as I listened to Sen. Barack Obama's
speech on race. I wondered, is America going to get this? Isn't this speech way
too carefully constructed and nuanced? Shouldn't he have explained what he
meant by "Jim Crow"? Shouldn't he have explained who William Faulkner was?

What's he doing giving this speech at 10 o'clock on a Tuesday morning? Doesn't
he know about prime time? Why did he write this speech himself? Doesn't he have
speechwriters and focus groups who can test this stuff? Shouldn't he be
shouting and waving his arms instead of standing coolly behind a lectern and
talking in measured cadence? Why isn't he pandering?

In what surely ranks as, among other things, one the boldest political gambles
in modern times, Sen. Obama decided that the American people were willing to
wrestle with complex ideas about the most divisive issue in nation. If it turns
out he's right, it will be a signal moment in recent intellectual history.

The trend surely has been in the other direction. In her controversial new book
"The Age of American Unreason," author Susan Jacoby argues that the "scales of
American history have shifted heavily against the vibrant and varied
intellectual life so essential to functioning democracy. During the past four
decades, America's endemic anti-intellectual tendencies have been grievously
exacerbated by a new species of semiconscious anti-rationalism, feeding on and
fed by an ignorant popular culture of video images and unremitting noise that
leaves no room for contemplation or logic."

In other words, she argues, it's become fashionable to be stupid.

Here is a nation founded by an eerily atypical cadre of intellectuals —
Jefferson, Adams, Madison, Franklin and their ilk — who not only had read the
Greeks but also had absorbed them, who had read Locke and Voltaire and were
building a nation along Enlightenment principles.

Here is a nation that has been led by that archetypal American hero, the
self-made man: the Lincoln who strides out of the backwoods with an ax on his
shoulder and a book in his hand; the Truman who failed as a farmer, failed as a
haberdasher but somehow, because he read widely and deeply, had the wisdom to
help rebuild a shattered world.

And now, here is this same nation, led by a man who can't correctly pronounce
the word "nuclear" and who once told an interviewer that he avoids reading
newspapers because they're full of "opinions."

This is not to say that President Bush is stupid, only that he is profoundly
intellectually incurious, willing to substitute belief for science, ideology
for fact. And in this, he is typical of his age.

"Just before the 2004 presidential convention," Jacoby writes, "the journalist
Ron Suskind reported a chilling conversation with a senior Bush aide who told
Suskind that members of the press were part of what the Bush administration
considers 'the reality-based community' — those who believe that solutions
emerge from judicious study of discernible reality."

The aide bragged that "when we act, we create our own reality."

These "realities" — that the Iraq war has been a stunningly successful response
to 9/11, that FEMA did a heck of a job in responding to Hurricane Katrina, that
tax cuts for the rich benefited all Americans, that tapping telephones in
Tuscaloosa stops terrorists in Timbuktu — speak for themselves.

In much the same way, many Americans create their own reality from what they
choose to believe, be it fundamentalist preachers preaching that the world is
4,000 years old to street rumors about AIDS being a white plot unleashed to
devastate black communities. The A.C. Nielsen Co. reports the average American
watched 4 hours and 30 minutes a day of television in 2006. The National
Endowment for the Arts reports that the same average American spends 26 minutes
a day reading.

Oh, and the choices TV offers! You don't ever have to watch anything hard or
unpleasant if you don't want to. If you choose, you can watch people getting
tattoos for an hour or two each day. You can devote yourself 24 hours a day to
sports news or celebrity news or news that you agree with, and commentators who
tell you only what you want to hear. And when they make fun of egghead
professors and book learning — global warming, what a joke! — you can revel in
your own anti-intellectualism.

Politicians know all of this, of course. That's why they use 30-second attack
ads that pander to short attention spans and that reinforce distorted beliefs.
TV news directors know it, too; to avoid driving off any more of their
dwindling audiences, they try not to use any more than 10 seconds of any
candidate's remarks. In 2000, Jacoby reports, the average political sound-bite
was down to 7.8 seconds.

So there was Barack Obama, making a 37-minute speech on a very unpleasant
subject, replete with literary and historical allusions, in the middle of a
Tuesday morning, trusting that Americans somehow would stop and pay attention
to it. Even if you don't plan to vote for the man, you have to hope he was
right.

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2008-03-23T14:36:31Z

All right, fess up. Which one of you f@#*ers ordered the snow?