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sabbato — Sat, 07 Jan 2012 04:59:48 GMT

So I've moved over to Dreamwidth for the time being, but that does not mean I'll stop reading everyone's journal entries here on livejournal. I am Flotilla over there.

I have been updating my journal more and more with the fresh start. It's nice, thinking about it. I feel like I've been tied down to too much of the past. It's nice to not be able to look back and move forward.

sabbato — Sun, 04 Dec 2011 03:39:37 GMT

Hello December. I have really let time fly by haven't? I'm sorry I haven't posted in a while, it's been rather hectic to an extent. I've also been very reflective as of late, finding myself thinking I still hurt from things long past.

But that's another story, one I don't really want to get in to right now. I just wanted to give an update that I might actually be going to school. I will see where it goes, but I am thinking about getting into cosmetology. Hair just sounds fun to work with and it's completely hands on. We'll see.

I'm trying to get into roleplaying again. It's nice but at the same time I feel like I am floundering at it. I feel like I have been out of it for so long that I am completely out of practice. The same goes for my writing (and it's a good thing I don't draw. It'd be hitting lows all over the place then). But I am going to keep my fingers crossed I do better this month. If I do I'll likely end up applying for a second character (either Liara or Claire, I'm unsure yet. I will probably end up playing both in the end along side of Kal.)

If I don't I'll likely drop in January despite the fact I love the cast and the game setting itself.

I don't quite have anything else to say. Just that I hope everyone is doing well and I'm still reading everything I see on livejournal I've just been awful at updating myself.

sabbato — Fri, 09 Sep 2011 06:07:32 GMT

Since the news about Revelations has been mostly about brand new characters, I decided I wanted to talk about it. (More like rant, as it were.)

This ended up being really long, and as I am a Capcom Unity member, I am debating on posting it on my blog there as well. We'll see. I figure I'd start here since I haven't updated in a while.

There are times I've wondered to myself "What happened to Resident Evil?" Maybe it's the fact that the games themselves have changed from the survival horrors we know and love to a more action style game play to bring in a wider audience. I won't deny that this is a good marketing move, especially with the new Resident Evil Operation: Raccoon City game expected to come out first quarter of next year. However with Resident Evil Revelations bringing back the feeling of survival horror, I can't help but wonder where Capcom is going with the new characters they are introducing.

Over the years there have been so many characters that have come and gone in the Biohazard games that I can't even keep track of them without some help. With the introduction of new characters I have to wonder: what about some of the characters from previous games who haven't gotten as much screen time as say Chris, or Jill, or even Leon? Leon has been saturating the Resident Evil name since his solo debut in Resident Evil 4 that he has now officially been in three games, two moves, and mentioned in two games he does not appear in. Chris has starred in three games himself, going on four now and the same for Jill. As much as I love Claire, even she has been in two games and a movie (and finally a debut in the Resident Evil: The Mercenaries 3D game). But what about the side characters introduce through the games like Sherry Birkin, Steve Burnside, Barry Burton, or Billy Cohen? There are so many characters for Capcom to choose from, it feels like they're just sitting on the wayside.

It strikes me as almost odd that they've set themselves up for so much potential with these characters just to fall flat. For example: Steve Burnside was infected with the t-Veronica virus and dies in Claire's arms after telling her he loves her. Shortly after this scene, we run into Albert Wesker who tells Claire and her brother Chris that Steve has the potential to be like him. Is there a possibility that Steve can come back from the dead and become a similar tyrant that Wesker is? Wesker leaves the idea very open ended, leaving the option open that Steve can return from the dead.

Let's not forget that we also have an entire cast of characters who are Raccoon City survivors thanks to Resident Evil Outbreak files 1 and 2. Yoko Suzuki worked for Dr. William Birkin and Umbrella Pharmecutical for a short time, which lead to a traumatic experiment on her that caused her to flee and block out the memories. However, the outbreak in Raccoon City has her remember and leads her to lean on Alyssa Ashcroft, a reporter from the game, and the other survivors to help her through it. Her relationship with Alyssa eventually leads to the pair exposing Umbrella's plans and the events of Raccoon City. Alyssa's reports even detail an event prior to the events of 1998 where she was attacked by Albert Lester in 1993 in a hospital in the Arklay Mountains. His daughter, Dorthy Lester, was last seen eating her co-worker and friend Kurt.

Bill Cohen is still alive as Rebecca let him go at the end of Resident Evil 0, Barry Burton is alive and well in Canada with his wife and children, the entire Outbreak cast can exist alongside of our main heros (as you can find Chris Redfield's medical records in the Raccoon City Hospital when he was admitted after the mansion incident), and let's not forget Carlos Oliveria from Resident Evil 3 who survives thanks to Jill Valentine. There are characters from Resident Evil Dead Aim and Survivor that we can look to as well as Manuela Hildago from the Resident Evil The Darkside Chronicles game.

Is it because these characters were just meant to have a supporting role? Rebecca Chambers, who had a brief cameo in Resident Evil, came back to star in her own game Resident Evil 0. Barry did show up in Resident Evil Gaiden with Leon Kennedy on the Gameboy Colour, but I'll be honest I don't know many people who have even heard of Gaiden, least of all played it. While I am looking forward to the new characters in Resident Evil Revelations, Jessica and Parker don't strike me as being characters that will reappear in later games much like characters listed above. Will we see them again? Who knows. There are rumours of Resident Evil 6 floating around with the emphasis of a reboot of the series with new characters, but what about the existing characters who are already established in the games massive franchise but have yet to really shine?

Maybe I am hopefully optimistic at some loose ends and plot holes being tied up, or the revelation of information about characters who have come and gone but still left a mark on the games as a whole. I, for one, would like to see some of these characters team up in a new way. Part of me hopes that the Outbreak characters will make an apperance in Operation: Raccoon City due to the nature of the game, but seeing as Leon is once again the main focus (despite the fact that Claire is confirmed for the game, and Jill most likely due to the time frame) I am not holding my breath. But who knows? Maybe we'll see Kevin or Cindy again, or have Sherry appear in her own game. I'm keeping an optimistic hope that the franchise itself can hold on to it's hardcore fans, while still making new experiences with their characters.

In the mean time, I've just been working quite a bit. It's been an up and down trip as I continue through life. I am stressed out, over worked, and exhausted but I am still loving every minute of life. Sure I get depressed, but recently I've come to find that it's nothing that huge to worry about right now. I'm still young and I have plenty of time to worry about the big decisions in life. I'm currently waiting for the title of my car so I can finally finish becoming a Florida resident, and I'm paying some fabulous bills but I find that I should worry less about them.

The hardest part is being so far away from my fiancee some nights. Being some nine hundred miles apart is going to be killer over the next few years but hey. It's going to be well worth it in the end. I think Comic Con spoiled me too much with being able to just sleep next to her. Hopefully with the holidays coming up we can try and work something out.

If not well... hey we've got next Comic Con or even PAX I hope.

I hope everything is going well in the mean time for you guy. Let's positive thinking, right?

sabbato — Wed, 24 Aug 2011 19:56:51 GMT

Things have been going smoothly lately. I mean there have been some bills that came that I panicked, and my stress levels have been all over the place but... it's still smooth compared to what it could be.

I don't really want to focus on the "what if" situations.

I've been working a lot more, so I've been a bit lacking in a lot things I do online. I've been on xbox live a lot more and I'm gearing up next week for work due to it being our Madden release. That should be a blast. Though let it be known I don't know play any sports games so I've been playing Madden 11 just to get an idea how it works. I at least won my superbowl attempt on my first try.

I had fun, but it's still not my kind of game.

There's really nothing else to report in on. I had a ton of fun at San Diego Comic Con, and maybe I'll do a late convention report once I get things straightened out on my end. I've been really tempted to move again, but I still have to wait two years.

Hopefully these next two years will fly by.

Anyway, I hope everyone is doing all right. ♥ Let's positive thinking!

sabbato — Tue, 17 May 2011 02:36:31 GMT

There isn't much going on in my life lately. Cliff flew out to visit and it's been so much fun. We played Mass Effect, Portal 2, Dead Space 2... so many games and just hung out. It's been a while since I got to spend time with him.

I am rather excited though. Wednesday I get to fly out to Cincinnati to head out for ACEN. I am so excited there are no words to express it without going on for quite a while. I'm mostly going to spend time with my girlfriend and I cannot wait to see her again. I feel like it's been too long but December wasn't that far off it seems.

Then Comic Con is coming up and I just... am so excited to be hanging out with Travis and Garrett. It'll be fantastic.

I have been thinking more though on the past lately. I'm unsure why but... reflection isn't a bad thing. It's just a lot of thinking.

I hope everyone else has a fantastic week and weekend! I know I will.

sabbato — Mon, 25 Apr 2011 01:35:14 GMT

I haven't updated in a while, and I keep saying I want to and will but it never happens.

Instead of talking about myself today, I want to hear about you guys if you have time to comment. I want to reconnect with my f-list again before I start to post more. I mean I read everything but I need to start commenting around more often.

♥ So how is everyone today? Tell me about how your day went or tell me something that happened recently good or bad. Or even ask me a question! Let's get to know each other again!

sabbato — Sat, 26 Mar 2011 04:55:34 GMT

It's been a while since I've updated. Life has been going pretty well lately. I've been working more, and I am really excited for working with the Rays again this season. Between them and Gamestop I am prepared to give my all. I am really looking forward to our early opening for our 3DS thing on Sunday even if I will be up super early. Work is really going well and I love it.

I missed working, so bouncing back between the two jobs will be fun.

There's nothing much else to say! I know next week will be busy beyond all reason, but I am looking forward to doing something each day. Monday I am getting my taxes done (finally), Tuesday I am getting my hair done again, Wednesday is a spring training game, Thursday I work for Gamestop, and Friday is the first game of the year. I think I work through the weekend too but I can't remember.

I'm going to be so tired by the end of it.

Oh! My siblings are all coming out to visit! I'm so excited. My mother too, though I would really like it if my stepfather would come out too.

I am having a hard time losing weight, but it's mostly on my hips and stomach. It's not too bad, but I'm still pretty self conscious about it. It probably doesn't help that my staple foods at home are pastas because it's easy to make and I don't cook much at all. I'm going to keep trying. Walking to work has been helping me a lot and when I work at Tropicana I have to walk across a very long bridge. It'll be fun! I can totally power walk to work or sommat.

I also saw Sucker Punch recently. I loved it, and I know it had it's problems but I still very much enjoyed it. The soundtrack and the visual effects were stunning, and I really enjoyed the over all idea of the story. I just wish we had more.

I'm hoping there will be a lot more or some extras when it's released on DVD.

♥ I hope everyone has a good rest of their evening.

sabbato — Sat, 12 Mar 2011 08:39:24 GMT

I watched Mars Attacks! the other day, and I wonder now why I was terrified of it when I was younger. I have never laughed so hard in my life. We also watched the Rainbow Brite movie tonight and all I could think of is how I would have loved to drink to it. I shall learn to do so next time. Though if I was to turn Rainbow Brite into drinking game, I'm sure I'd start ruining my childhood.

Tomorrow Cat, Ali and I are going to the Renaissance fair. I am looking forward to it and I am looking forward to just hanging out with friends and having a blast.

Though, randomly I cleaned out my closet today to finally unpack from my move in August, and while going through my boxes I found a sealed syringe at the bottom of one of the boxes. Now back in August when my boxes were shipped to me, they had been pretty battered and several of my books were missing and a few of my comics had been stolen from me. To find a needle was a little shocking.

Especially when I noticed it was the type of needle used to draw blood.

I have no idea how it got into my box but I've since removed it from my closet and from the floor just in case.

I'm a little scatterbrained in this entire entry. So I leave you off on a good note that the days go on to be increasingly better as time moves forward. Despite the fact that I have my moments where I cannot breath or move from a single spot, I feel a little more upbeat and optimistic about the future.

sabbato — Fri, 04 Mar 2011 09:57:24 GMT

I had a fantastic night tonight.

But I made the dumbest mistake ever. This is what I get for not checking my friend add/remove thing like...constantly.

It's been a while, but I've been in really good spirits the last few days. I've been so creative lately, it makes me wish that I could draw. Creative, working, hanging out and doing stuff - it's all so nice and new in a sense.

I never really went out and did things before. I feel free for once.

And I really should be in bed, so I promise a more coherent entry later.

sabbato — Sat, 12 Feb 2011 02:32:55 GMT

FUCK YES.

My costume is completed for our midnight release of Marvel vs. Capcom 3 (with the exception of my wig).

You guys ready for the midnight?

In the mean time I got myself some AV cables for my Dreamcast so I can bring it with me to work for the midnight release. We are having a tournament in the movie theatre for Marvel vs. Capcom 3 and for those idling in the store they can play Marvel vs. Capcom 2 on the Dreamcast.

I cannot wait! Evil owns my soul for helping me with the costume.

sabbato — Tue, 08 Feb 2011 08:08:42 GMT

It's not necessarily a recent realization, but more of a constant in my life. I am afraid I cannot live on my own. I'm entirely dependent on having someone around even though we may live entirely separate lives. I'm too nervous with living on my own, and extremely paranoid. Even living in secured environment I lock every door in the condo, even my own bedroom at night.

For about two weeks I will be alone in the condo again. It's a bit strange and it's nothing like the month or so I survived earlier, but it's a little unsettling.

But Wednesday I am looking forward to. I am getting my hair cut and dyed, and I have work Wednesday and Thursday. It's exciting that I am working more. I look forward to work each week now. I only hope I can continue to get hours around the area. I also am anticipating going back to work for Centerplate for the baseball season.

I've been feeling good though. I'm not depressed or as anxious as I was the previous time my grandparents went on vacation. My grandfather is sick, but I was hearing it was clearing up right before they left. I think this time I am more mentally prepared to be by myself.

Tomorrow I am supposed to be finishing my Jill Valentine costume. I still need a wig and I am unsure where I am to get one that will work. The last wig shop I went to was very rude and rather unhelpful. Hopefully I can get one in time for the midnight release of Marvel vs. Capcom 3.

sabbato — Sat, 05 Feb 2011 04:27:32 GMT

I want a bunch of these in a tank.

Brought to you by me, and my ridiculousness in Versus on our Resident Evil LIVE party.

Aw yeah.

sabbato — Sat, 29 Jan 2011 12:08:51 GMT

I don't think I have been more offended over something in quite a long time. Perhaps it's just my view on life but I'm rather offended.

I feel like I have been complaining a lot about roleplay without seeming to do anything and I feel silly about that. Nothing is going to change or more forward unless I do something. I apologise if I come off as if I am whining too much.

Good news though! I have picked up more hours at Gamestop and working has become enjoyable again. I was worried because of how little I was getting, but with this? It's fantastic news. Not only that I was sent a letter to return to work for the Rays again and I am going to take it. After that I am going to finish my application with Starbucks and hope for the best. I'm hoping to at least establish myself in one of these companies and working forward.

If all else, it's a start. I was talking to Wise recently and I'm hoping to give him some assistance and start using my Japanese again.

Who knows! I'm looking forward. It's lie the future is a lot brighter suddenly.

Also I am going to try and get my hair done next week. My roots are so bad that I desperately need to get it done.

♥ I hope you all slept well and have a great day today!

sabbato — Thu, 20 Jan 2011 08:56:28 GMT

So, I just finished watching Terra e the 1980 movie and I have to say that it's quite a bit different from the recent anime. The changes from the movie to the anime are very obvious.

The anime gave Soldier Blue a much bigger role than the movie did. Keith was more... I don't know complacent about the things going on around him. He seems to accept situations better than he does in the anime. When Shiroe (who has a very small part in the movie) tells him how he came to be, he doesn't seem to mind it all too much. He just tells Shiroe to rest and questions the mother computer later.

I felt that Keith was a much different character here in this than in the anime. He just went through the thoughts people suggested with ease. Learning who Physis was to him, his relationship with Makka/Matsuka was much different too. He still hit him, but he was more trust worthy in the end. Makka also did not die to protect him.

Jomy started off very aggressive but as soon as Blue died (which was very early on in the film) he took on Blue's role with very little worry.

I did like his relationship with Carin. It was very cute, and her reaction to Tony being taken from her was incredible. It has been a while since I have seen Terra e the anime but I don't recall it being that violent. Tony was a lot more cruel than his anime counter part.

There was also not a lot of expansion on the other children that natural births unlike the anime. They didn't have a personality or names.

Physis had a interesting role in the movie. The biggest difference I saw was that her hair was black, and I think I prefer it that way. It makes a little more sense to me why she and Keith are related. Her premonitions about the future were down played a lot though.

Though in the end I really enjoyed it. If I ever figure out how to stream the movie I will certainly do so!

Other then that? I have been wasting my life playing Assassin's Creed. We finished one, and we're moving on to II and then I'll be playing Brotherhood.

There is nothing too interesting going on. I'll have a more life update later!

sabbato — Thu, 20 Jan 2011 02:00:55 GMT

Today I sold a lot of my manga.

But that's not why I'm posting right now.

I finally have the movie I was looking for since Toward Terra was released in anime form.

DON'T CARE IF IT'S SIDEWAYS. AW YEAH CAN'T WAIT TO WATCH THIS.

sabbato — Sat, 01 Jan 2011 05:48:32 GMT

Tonight just before midnight I was told by a woman I didn't even know that I should do what I want to do with my life and I shouldn't let my family tell me how I should live. I cannot thank her enough for telling me this.

It's now the new year on the east coast and I wish everyone a happy new year. To everyone I've ever know let us make 2011 one fantastic year. I wish everyone the best, and I hope that everyone has a wonderful new year.

♥ I am so excited for the new year. I am really looking forward to the future and it seems brighter every day. Though as I sit here and think about those I don't speak to any more and I miss them dearly.

So I hope the very best for everyone this year. I will keep them in my thoughts happily. I think this year I want to be less negative about my feelings, and be more open about them. I am not the kind of person to share my emotions so freely, in fact i keep them bottled up as of late.

And with that? I also believe this year I will obtain a more stable job.

To the new year!

sabbato — Mon, 20 Dec 2010 04:35:34 GMT

When I told Cat and Ali that I was going to sleep until five I was merely kidding. Unfortunately it did not turn out like that. So I decided to take the day just to relax and get my barrings together before I run off and turn in applications both on and offline as well as updating my resume to include my single day of Gamestop work.

Tomorrow I will also be dropping by Gamestop to see what I can do or if there is anything I can possibly do to assist them. I feel like dead weight with the fact that I have no hours. Even if it was just another single day this week I would have been happy. Don't get me wrong, I understand that the holiday season is difficult and experienced hands are needed but I still feel quite useless when I want to do more to help.

I miss writing in a journal I've come to find. Sure plurk is nice, but I miss the thought and depth of journal writing some days. It's therapeutic just to write out my thoughts and worries. It's been so long since I've regularly updated I figure it wouldn't be so much harm.

So there is at least a game plan in the works for getting a job once again. I am also waiting for my stepfather to send me my social security card soon. I need it in order to establish residency in the state of Florida so I may attend school.

Tomorrow will be amazing. ♥ I just have to keep telling myself that.

sabbato — Thu, 02 Dec 2010 10:06:45 GMT

For all it's worth, I feel oddly sappy. I have listened to nothing but love songs in the last few days. I finished my novel and I set it down smiling for the ending was something I was anticipating but was so glad to see it's conclusion.

I hope that everyone is doing well. The seasonal depression is not hitting me as hard as it was earlier in the season, and I think I will make it out on top. It has been an interesting thing to struggle against my thoughts and despair. While I think about it, I wonder if perhaps I am over thinking everything. I am getting used to the idea of being home alone if only slightly.

It could be because I received some of the best news the other day. You see my grandfather went in for heart surgery the day I flew out for Thanksgiving holiday. I have been nothing but nervous as he has been ill since the previous summer. He has almost died once and I could not bear to lose him now. Not when my grandmother and he finally married and not when she just needs him to be happy. I hear he is going fabulously. He is on his feet, his is sounding healthier, and I get to see him and my grandmother come Monday.

I didn't want to speak and worry about him since I have worried and stressed about it for months. I worried but I wasn't sure if I wanted to express it as my grandparents are rather private people. I am so glad to hear he is doing well however. I just had to write down my excitement to hear such a thing.

♥ I hope everyone is doing wonderful.

sabbato — Mon, 29 Nov 2010 20:42:52 GMT

I have been doing SO MUCH lately I don't even know where to begin. I feel really good about myself as of late. And while the seasonal depression has hit me, it wasn't as hard as it normally is, but I fear that might get worse later on. But on to happier things! So far I have seen Tangled, Megamind, How to Train your Dragon, and Harry Potter in the last few weeks, and I flew back to Reno for the Thanksgiving holiday!

It has been good to say the least. Spending time with my family, getting the chance to go out with some friends I haven't seen in a while; it's lovely! My stepfather and I are going out to sushi today and I think it's come down to the final stretch where I just relax. It's been such an interesting week I don't know where to begin!

Since I've arrived, it's been one big "I can't wait until Thanksgiving". My brother, Josh, flew in from the Unincorporated county of Snohomish and we've all been hanging out. He flew back home yesterday.

Oh and yesterday! Yesterday Alex and Janice went to brunch (which was wonderful) and just bummed around and relaxed. Then I went over and visited Travis and Garrett which was DAMN fun. We went to dinner over at Jazz, a Louisiana kitchen restaurant! The food was good, and the conversation was amazing. Love those kids. We went back to their place to watch The Expendables (which was AMAZING by the by. While it was indeed a terrible movie, but I enjoyed the action of it), and RoboGeisha (which was made by the same group who did Tokyo Gore Police). Totally worth it, and it's always nice to see them. They are certainly irreplaceable. Though I am under the firm believe that you don't replace friends, you just tend to move apart and move on.

I hope I never grow apart from these two, or from anyone who is in my life right now. Everyone is amazing. ♥ You all are amazing.

This entry is like all over the ruddy place, but there has been so much going on. I wish I could actually focus but I feel I should at least go and get a shower to go out to sushi.

There will be more later! ♥ I hope you all have a great week and had a fantastic holiday!

sabbato — Fri, 12 Nov 2010 01:46:57 GMT

I love history. If there is anything I love more is learning about America and it's past. I'm not too big on the politics of it all, but I want to hear it anyway. I went out with Barbara Olsen tonight and I just could sit and listen to her talk for hours. I was completely blown away just hearing that she was born in 1923 and just... listening to her talk about her life. It's fascinating.

Despite this though, I feel down. I can't breath on occasion and I just don't know where I'm going or what I'm doing. I feel lost. Perhaps that I just don't quite belong to anything right now. I'm nervous about going back to school, scared that things will only turn out like UNR and TMCC all over again, but I want to do something with my life.

I feel as though my life is meaningless right now. I'm not quite content with myself. I feel my whole life has consisted of three years of me being miserable, working day in and day out with no sense of gratification of what I'm doing up until the day I left. I want something more out of my life, and I feel that sometimes that is asking too much. I worry I was too hasty in moving across the country chasing a dream that my parents and grandparents think I could just do better at something else. I worry I've become to cynical about what I want to do with myself.

To be honest I don't know what I want to do any more. I want to learn to cook, I want to get back into the hospitality business, I want to do something that makes me feel like I'm making some sort of difference.

I'm not unhappy though. While I don't know when I'm working, or how many hours I'll be getting I'm content with just being. I dislike being alone in the condo as I dread coming home to nothing, but I am happy with the time I have now. I am catching up on my reading, I'm watching movies, I am playing video games, things I haven't done in what feels like ages. I am almost enjoying the lack of a job but I just can't not work. My grandmother hounds me all the time about it. "When are you getting a job?" She asks, or "when do you work? Why don't you have a job?". I can't count how many times I've tried to tell her I don't want something too big just yet. I have an amazing girlfriend, amazing friends, and my family is quite supportive of what I do so I cannot complain too much.

But still, I feel that I moved too quickly. My old boss was promising me a better job. I could have had an amazing career but I just...didn't feel it was for me. I didn't want to sacrifice my happiness just for comfort and money but my parents keep dropping subtle hints that I made the wrong choice.

I can't keep this up any more. I'm not okay with anything I do. My body, my life, my thoughts day in and day out inhibit me from being more daring. I dared to move across the country, and I felt good about it but now... I keep worrying I made the wrong decision. That I'm setting myself up to fail.

I want to prove them wrong. I've made good friends here. I've done things I never thought I would ever get the courage to do. Even in this I seize up and panic over small things. Body image has always plagued me, and I keep hearing how so-and-so artist is "fat" and how "over weight" this-one actor is when they are no where near the normal terms of the words. I've stopped eating over this

I apologise if this was too whiny. I think writing manages to collect my thoughts a bit better than just talking things out. I feel like at times I am overreacting to the small things in life, but I can't escape the feelings. It's become relaxing to just sit and type everything out, or write in a journal.

I hope everyone is having a good night, at the very least. ♥ I was thinking of walking down to the Hooker Tea Company and grabbing some tea as it might be relaxing. I miss being able to drive around McCarren Blvd now that I think about it. Driving was so relaxing back in Reno. I'm afraid I'll get lost here in St. Pete and not be able to find my way back.

So off for tea!

sabbato — Thu, 11 Nov 2010 02:21:53 GMT

I'm still not used to living alone, but it is slowly becoming easier to say the least. I felt really good about myself today when I did the dishes and cleaned the condo. Not that it is messy, oh no, it's just that I needed to get some things done. I was thinking of going out, but I don't think that is going to happen tonight.

But it is happening tomorrow! I'm kind of excited. Barbara Olsen, a good friend of my grandparents, invited me out to dinner. I am actually really excited, we seem to have a lot in common and she is very sweet. I don't know where we're going to go out yet, but I am sure it'll be wonderful.

The house I was showing was part of an open house, and unfortunately in the time I was there, no one came by to visit. It was all right though, I did enjoy sitting around hoping for the chance, and I worried a bit that I didn't look professional enough, but in the end it was a good day.

So now I am catching up on my childhood by watching Rocko's Modern Life and trying not to fail too much in my attempts at playing Assassin's Creed. Hope everyone else is having a fantastic day!

sabbato — Fri, 05 Nov 2010 08:06:55 GMT

Today wasn't a bad day. It was good, as they have been but... sitting in my condo by myself has been an adventure. I can't handle the solitude. It's not so much that I have not been going out, oh no. Cat and I have been adventuring to Borders, roaming around down 4th st for food, and we are planning on going to see Megamind soon but returning to the quiet lonesome of my home is very unnerving.

I just don't know what to do with myself when it comes down to it. I feel like I cannot do anything. I can't breath and I panic easily. I have been trying to distract myself but I find it difficult to sleep at night. All of the doors are locked, even though this is a secure building I have locked the front door to the condo.

Perhaps I am being overly paranoid, but I don't feel comfortable. I've even started locking the door to my room (which it's new to me, I've never locked my room before as I never had a lock previously). I really hate being alone.

I've been playing on xbox live more though. I watched most of the Ahh! Real Monsters series, and I might start up Assassin's Creed tomorrow. I have nothing going on through the day and that might help take my mind off of everything.

I am showing a house on Saturday, and I paid the man doing the lawn care for my grandmother on one of the properties she is selling. It is actually a very cute little house and after the job that lawn care man did? I think it'll be an easy sell. It looks good, in my opinion, but it needs some work. The house I am showing Saturday should prove to be interesting. I was never interested in realty before but it's been quite an experience. I'm not sure I am committed enough to get my license and sell myself.

I leave this song with you as I head to bed.

sabbato — Tue, 02 Nov 2010 07:24:38 GMT

I have been slowly discovering the glories of my xbox 360. I've been so lethargic lately, but I have been enjoying watching movies again. I spent most of my time so far watching kids movies and just trying to keep myself calm.

I am living home alone right now and it's... not something I'm used to. I've been trying to find things to do. I've cleaned the condo so many times, I've entertained, and I've gone out but the condo is still empty. I'm not entirely sure how well I'm going to handle it until the thirteenth.

Other then that, I'm planning on registering my car here in Florida as well as getting a Florida license and plates. Once I become a Florida resident? I'm thinking about going to USF but... we'll see. I've been really down about getting a job here as well as going to school.

Part of me just doesn't want a job, or heck just getting a part time job would be the best part. I don't want to work something too heavy just yet. I'm enjoying my time relaxing and just being but I am slowly getting bored of doing nothing. I've been helping my grandmother with the realty business but believe you me it's not glamorous at all. I've been getting a house ready, making sure that the lawn is taken care of, that the people taking care of the lawn are paid, and that the house looks good for when grandma shows it.

I feel so bummed out lately though. Like... nothing really quite matters. I haven't done anything roleplay wise in almost two weeks and I just...cannot bring myself to do anything. I feel bad about it but I just can't bring myself to do much online lately.

Though I feel so creative. I am participating in NaNo which is funny because I usually abandon my projects by the time November rolls around. I haven't been so excited over something original in a long time so it's fantastic! I miss writing original things and I'm hoping to get back into it. My deviantart has been so... neglected. I haven't posted anything since March and I miss being able to create something.

I hope everyone has a good day tomorrow! I have errands to run for my grandmother but hopefully it'll go smoothly.

sabbato — Fri, 22 Oct 2010 20:21:39 GMT

I have to say that today was a great day. I got everything I needed to done, and I may be applying for a job with Bank of America. I'm not sure what position quiet yet, but we'll see how it goes. One of the managers actually asked me for my resume today. I hope it all works out!

Other then that I am pretty much just relaxing as I wait for my grandmother. I think we're going to turn that "let's go to lunch!" into a "let's go to dinner" seeing as it's four.

I hope everyone else is having a good day today! I'll see you all later. ♥

sabbato — Mon, 18 Oct 2010 09:13:09 GMT

TONIGHT. WAS AN AWESOME NIGHT.

Even if I still can't sleep. I'm going to go work out if I'm still up in an hour!

I hope everyone else had a brilliant night! It just some how turned out to be so nice. I had a great conversation, a few of them actually! And I hope things all work out. I might go running for an hour and then come home, shower, and sleep for a little while to go grocery shopping. It's so hard to grocery shop! I'm still learning all of the tricks to the trade but it's a fun experience! I've learned that if I don't think I am going to eat it, I probably shouldn't buy it. I don't have brothers around any more who will eat it for me.

I don't need a lot, but I might buy some crackers and get some more provolone cheese and use those for snacks. I am thinking celery and some raisins to make ants on a log (I already have the peanut butter). I am actually excited to go grocery shopping tomorrow!

So with that I am going to bid you all a good night and a FABULOUS morning and day. I am going to go running if it comes down to it!