♡fics

Eunhae One-shot: Strawberry Mocha

aidenrose — Tue, 27 Apr 2010 01:07:25 GMT

Title: Strawberry Mocha
Length: One-shot / 750
Genre: Fluff
Pairing: Eunhyuk / Donghae
Rating: G
Synopsis: Eunhyuk ~~cheats on Donghae with a strawberry mocha~~ comes back to his room to find Donghae waiting for him.

"HYUKKIE" \@w@/

I was really in the mood for some...

...so I wrote this. But now I'll be going to, uh, write something serious again...yes... >>;

What's everyone's favorite food item involving strawberries?

Please read and enjoy! ^ ^ /

Strawberry Mocha

"Donghae."

Eunhyuk leaned against the doorframe of his own room, holding a to go cup of coffee, and looked at Donghae lying sprawled across his bed as if peering at him over a pair of glasses.

"Hello, sweetheart," Donghae said, waving from where he lay. "You look good."

"Do I?" Eunhyuk glanced down at himself, dressed in casual clothing, a zip-up hoodie loosely hugging his sides to keep out the cool spring air.

"Where'd you go? To buy that?"

Eunhyuk glanced at his coffee questioningly, and Donghae nodded.

"Yeah."

"Didn't you get me anything?" Donghae pouted.

"No," Eunhyuk laughed, shutting the door behind him. "I didn't know you'd be here. What are you doing here?"

"Got lonely."

"Aww." Eunhyuk sat down on the bed and smiled at him. "Well, let's fix that."

"What did you get?" Donghae sat up and glanced suggestively between Eunhyuk's face and the cup.

"Want to try it?" Eunhyuk crawled to the middle of the bed and pushed Donghae's legs away to make room. He held the cup out to Donghae. "Don't burn your tongue."

"Thanks." Donghae sipped it. Eunhyuk watched as his expression quickly turned from curiosity to disgust. He coughed as he gave it back to him, his mouth drawn into a thin line and his eyes screwed up.

"What's wrong?" Eunhyuk laughed.

"What is that?"

"It's a strawberry mocha," Eunhyuk replied innocently. He laughed at Donghae's expression and eased the lid off of the cup. "You don't like it?"

Donghae shook his head, as if to say no one would, and Eunhyuk smiled.

"Just have the whipped cream, then," he said.

"You don't mind?"

He shrugged. "I like the coffee."

"Okay." Donghae took it from him again and skimmed the whipped cream off of the top, watching as Eunhyuk stood up and took his hoodie off and hung it up. Eunhyuk stretched his hands over his head and yawned, and looked back at Donghae with a smile.

"Either I drink that and stay awake or we nap, and I drink it later when it's cold."

"Cold coffee is the best coffee."

"You just want to sleep with me."

"I told you I'm lonely. I need love."

"You're so cute when you're honest." Eunhyuk laughed softly and took the drink from him. He sipped it, smiled with satisfaction at the flavor, and set it down on the nightstand with the lid loosely covering it. Donghae moved over as Eunhyuk pulled back the blanket and got beneath it, tugging on Donghae's arm. Donghae joined him and immediately snuggled into him.

"Why are you feeling so lonely?" Eunhyuk murmured, pulling the blanket up around them. He turned towards him and sighed, his fingers lightly stroking Donghae's hair. Donghae shrugged and planted a small kiss on his neck.

"I don't know. I just want you."

"It's not like we haven't been seeing each other."

"It's everything," Donghae said in a rush. "It's work and stress and people and expectations we have to meet, and I just want to forget all of that and be with you for a while."

"Sorry." Eunhyuk sighed and slung his arm over Donghae. "I should have asked you to come with me to the café."

"It's okay. I waited for you."

"Obviously." He laughed. "You're right here."

"Hyukkie, why do you like strawberries so much?"

"Ahh...why is my tongue red?"

"Because you're human."

"No, no. It's because there is a strawberry's soul there who was separated from its strawberry lover long ago. It wants to find that strawberry, so I keep eating them, searching for the right one. I just haven't found it yet."

Donghae laughed. "What kind of story is that?"

Eunhyuk laughed and kissed his cheek. "A made-up one."

"What will you do if you find that strawberry?"

"Well, they would only be reunited for a moment, wouldn't they? And strawberries aren't very smart. It would probably think that the strawberry had just left and not been eaten...so I'd just keep eating more."

"You'll never stop, will you?"

"No. I love them. Strawberries." Eunhyuk nodded to himself.

"If you had to be without one thing forever, would it be me or strawberries?"

Eunhyuk rolled his eyes. "Please."

"Seriously!"

"If you want me to say that I love you, just ask."

Donghae hid his face against him, and Eunhyuk started to laugh again.

"Why are you being shy?"

"Just...me or strawberries?"

"Strawberries!"

"Good." Donghae sighed with relief and then laughed. "But Hyukkie..."

"What?"

"Tongues are pink."

Polychromatic Us: Chapter Seven

aidenrose — Sat, 24 Apr 2010 05:08:44 GMT

Title: Polychromatic Us
Part: Chapter Seven: Purple
Previous Parts: Chapter One, Chapter Two, Chapter Three, Chapter Four, Chapter Five, Chapter Six
Genre: Romance
Pairing: Donghae / Eunhyuk
Rating: PG-13 (sensuality)
Word Count: 4,755
Synopsis: Colors have always been there in our relationship...from the day I met you. If I were to tell our story, I’d do it with a canvas and paint; vibrant colors of every shade and hue.

No more dates for future updates...since I can't seem to meet them. ^^; Sorry! I'll just be posting asap instead.

Purple

"Do you want to go up afterward and say goodbye to him alone?"

My hand twitches on the computer mouse. I glance at Eeteuk, my eyes taking in the Kiss the Radio staff working several feet away at the same time. He's looking right at me, his expression enigmatic and expectant.

"What?" I ask, pretending that I hadn't heard him the first time.

"I said," he says patiently, poking his straw through a carton of juice, "would you like to go up after this is over and say goodbye to him alone?"

"To Donghae?"

"Yes."

"Why?" I ask, my eyes fixed on the computer screen.

"Stop pretending for a second," he says quietly. "Do you want to?"

"Yes," I answer after a few seconds. I glance at him quickly, just long enough to see the smallest of smiles, some measure of acceptance. Even if it's just for sixty seconds, I want to see you.

"I'll give you twenty minutes with him. You can go up before me, because I want to talk to Kyuhyun and Ryeowook before they go. That way you can talk privately."

"Okay."

"Hyukjae, breathe." He pats my shoulder and brushes one of my burning cheeks with the back of his hand. I wave his hand away, embarrassed, and he laughs. "It's okay."

I sit back in my chair and look at him, unsure of whether or not I should look relaxed. The look on his face makes me feel really silly, like I'm part of a practical joke that just failed miserably. Like a child who has tried to keep a secret from their mother, foolishly forgetting that mothers always know.

"Did you already say goodbye?" he asks.

"Not really," I say, using my drink as an excuse to look away again. "We've been avoiding it."

"You've never been apart," he says, leaning back and pulling his hood down over his eyes. "But you'll be okay."

He hits my insecurity right on the head without even knowing it. We've never been apart. Since I met you we've always been close together, training and working together for long hours and seeing each other in our free time. Even though we have different schedules and we don't live together, it feels like we always see each other. We've always been together, and the smallest, shyest, most insecure bit of me wonders if after being away from each other, our feelings will change.

I put my headphones back on. I try trusting in Eeteuk's prediction; if his observations of us together and knowledge of us both as individuals make him think we'll be alright, then surely we will be. Surely you and I have nothing to worry about. We won't even have time to get beyond missing each other before we'll see each other again.

I glance at the clock before the song ends and quickly calculate how long until I see you. What I don't think about is how long it will be until I see you again after tonight.

"Here," Eeteuk says, holding his keys out to me across the seat.

I take them, shyly thanking him. I hold them in my lap and finger the key to his dorm: the key to you.

My eyes glaze over on the way home as I fall into a kind of sleepy daze, inactively thinking about what I should say to you, and what I want to say to you. How should I touch you, when it will be the last time I'll touch you for a while?

It won't be as though we won't see each other at all until the day you quit promoting and come back to Korea; we'll just see each other infrequently and publicly. It isn't as though we won't talk, either. This is the age of cellphones and personal computers - we would have to try to not communicate. But it will still be the biggest change we've had to face, and I'm at a bit of a loss. I'm so used to you that I don't know how I'll feel when you aren't around. The mystery of parting is what bothers me the most - not knowing how I should expect to feel or if things will change, and not being able to discuss it with anyone else.

I follow Eeteuk into the building. I glance at him as the manager steps into the elevator and presses the buttons to go up to our respective floors. As we near the floor that I live on, Eeteuk looks at me and gives me a small smile.

"Twenty minutes," he reminds me unnecessarily as he and the manager step off.

"Got it."

I look at the narrow seam between the doors after they've closed, my heart sinking as the elevator carries it up. A part of me wants to ask Eeteuk for advice...but what would he know? He hasn't had a long-term relationship with anyone. If anything, he should be asking me for advice.

The people you live with aren't particularly social. They stick to their rooms and to each other, and I don't even see them as I walk through the dorm towards your shared room with Eeteuk. Sometimes I wish we lived together instead of separately, mixed in with our band mates who don't know about us. Normally I like living with the members that I do; they're my friends. It's just times like now, when I want to hang onto you, when loneliness promises to come calling, that I wish that you and I lived another life together.

I knock softly on the open door. You look up from where you're sitting on the floor in front of your open suitcase, seemingly unsurprised to see me.

"Hey," I say with a brief smile. "You all packed?"

"No. You aren't in there."

I smile at your dejected expression and tone and step into the room, closing the door behind me. I leave Eeteuk's keys on his dresser.

"Where's Eeteuk?"

"Downstairs," I say. "He asked me if I wanted to say goodbye to you alone, and I said yes."

"Didn't you tell him that you don't want to say goodbye?"

"We have to."

"How long will he be downstairs?"

"Twenty minutes."

You sigh. I sit down next to you and look at your suitcase, so neatly packed that I can't even take any satisfaction in giving you advice on how to be organized. My head lowers onto your shoulder as if drawn by a magnet and rests there.

"You're ready to go," I say, defeated. "In a few hours you'll be gone."

"I don't want to go."

"Don't say that. You should be excited about going."

"Shut up," you say with a small laugh. "You know what I meant."

"What did you mean?" I ask in a low voice, closing my eyes.

"I meant that I don't want to leave you behind." You lift one of my hands from my lap and spread my fingers out, tracing a vein from my wrist down to the top of my hand. You touch the tips of my fingers and the lines in the palm of my hand as if exploring the texture of my skin for the first time; as if you don't have every inch and subtlety of my body memorized.

"I love you," I say quietly, lifting my head up and looking at you. You look at me, a mixture of emotions in your eyes. "I'll miss you every day until you come home. I'm jealous of the experiences I won't get to share with you there."

"Hyukjae, I-..." you trail off and close your eyes, your hand closing around mine. "I'm so attached to you."

I laugh. It's a sad sound, one made because I don't know what to say. You put your arm around my waist and nuzzle your face into my neck.

"I love you," you murmur, your voice so warm and honest that I want to cry. "Hyukjae, I love you."

"Going to miss me?"

"Silly," you say, looking up and smiling at me. "I'm going to miss you all the time."

"Good." I lean into you, tracing a thread from your sweatpants up to your knee and pulling at it. "I don't want you to forget about me."

"I wouldn't be able to forget you over the space of years, let alone months," you say, kissing my hand. "Don't worry about that."

"How long has it been since you kissed me for the first time?" I wonder aloud. The way we kiss has changed so much since then. Everything has, come to think of it. We've both grown up and changed, and our relationship has changed as a consequence of that...but it's all been natural and it's all felt right, and I don't wish to go back to any point in time except for the present. I like the way our relationship feels right now.

"We were seventeen. Or you were, anyway." You lean your head against mine. "That was a long time ago."

When I'm with you my heart rests, at ease, assured, and the joy of loving and being loved fills me. I'm as comfortable as I'll ever be when I'm with you. I don't want to be without you, even if it's just for a few months. I don't want to waste precious time in our lives missing each other. Next to you is where I belong, is where I want to be, is where, in a very real sense, I need to be.

"It'll be okay," you say thoughtfully, squeezing my hand gently. "Going to China, I mean. It's not such a big deal."

"How many times did you have to tell that to yourself to believe it?"

"I didn't. Maybe it will even be good for us to have a break."

I sit up and look at you. "Do you want a break?"

"No," you say quickly, draping your arms over my shoulders. "But it's not such a bad thing."

I purse my lips. I don't want to agree with you or admit that your leaving is anything but sorrowful. You smile and stand up, pulling me up by my hands. You kiss me, running your hands down the sides of my body until you reach the hem of my shirt. Then you pull it over my head and toss it onto the end of your bed.

"Lie back." You pick up your carry-on and start rifling through it.

I obediently half lie down on your bed, propping myself up on my elbows, wondering what you're about, and watch as you retrieve your camera, a high quality digital one that you've had for a year, from your bag and climb onto the bed with it.

"You're taking my picture?" I almost gasp, sitting up. "Like this?"

"Yes," you say, reaching forward and rearranging my bangs. You gently push me down again. "Like this. Put those pillows behind you."

"This is embarrassing," I mutter, wanting to push the camera away and put my shirt back on and escape.

"Why?" You reach around me and adjust the pillows I'm lying against, propping me up with them, deliberately touching my bare skin at every opportunity. You kiss my neck before you reach back for your camera, smiling at me with something like adoring amusement. "You don't feel embarrassed when I look at you completely naked - why feel embarrassed about this? I'm the only one who will see these pictures."

"What if you lose your camera?"

You make a face at me. "I won't."

I look at you doubtfully. You cup your fingers beneath my chin and tilt my head to the side, running your finger along the line of my jaw.

"Be sexy," you say. "At least smile for me."

I blush as you lift the camera up to your eye and adjust the focus. I try. I really do try, because it is a little silly for me to be self conscious about this, isn't it? I should be comfortable doing anything with you.

In a way, I understand why you want to take my picture like this; you're photographing a me that no one else will ever see. Even if I participate in a shirtless photo shoot someday, which I find unlikely, the feeling wouldn't be the same. You're taking a picture of who I am, not who I present to the world.

You must be satisfied with my effort, because you take at least a dozen photographs of me from different angles.

You put the camera down and sit against the wall, passing me my shirt. I put it on, unable to repress a smile as I catch you watching me dress, and then I crawl to where you are and sit next to you again. I lean my head against yours as you hold the camera between us and look through the pictures you just took. They all came out bathed in purple, the light in the room casting dark shadows on my features and the fabrics beneath me. They're almost painfully intimate, and they make me blush. I'm too critical of myself to take any real pleasure in them.

"I really love," you say softly, shifting your gaze from the camera to the real me, "the way you look. You're really beautiful."

"Thanks." I smile in spite of myself. It pleases me that you think I'm good looking.

You put your camera down in exchange for your cellphone and take one last picture, one with both of us in it.

"You take one too," you say quietly, wrapping your hand around the back of my neck as you kiss me. I'd rather just kiss you than take our picture, but I know that a picture will be nice to have when I can't kiss you anymore. I break away from you, but you pull me back again. I laugh against your lips, amused by your contradictory words and actions and delighted by being wanted. My laugh makes you laugh, and you stick your fingers into my pocket and pull out my phone. You press it into my hand. I hold it out at arm's length and you sling your arm around my neck, looking at the phone with the most angelic smile.

I put the phone back into my pocket after taking a single picture and submit more than willingly to your insistent kissing, eager to be close to you before you go away. Maybe kissing now will make your absence more painful, but I doubt it; I think I would feel cheated if we didn't express how we feel with our bodies. I want to do more with you, but there isn't time, and this isn't the place for it.

At some point one of us remembers that Eeteuk will be coming back, and we stop, and revert to holding hands and looking into each other's eyes the way that makes other people feel like gagging.

"Call me," you say. The way you say it fills me with the fantastic notion that a phone call is a special intimacy for us to share, something more magical than technology transmitting our voices through space. "I'll call you."

"I promise. Take care of yourself," I say, more out of formality than actual concern. I know you'll take care of yourself.

"You, too," you reply with a smile. "Don't get into another car accident while I'm gone. I wouldn't be able to bear it."

"I won't."

We smile at each other, and you lean in to kiss me again. Just before your lips touch mine, though, there is a soft knock on the door, followed by Eeteuk opening it.

You quickly move away, the faintest of blushes on your cheeks.

"Time's up?" I ask quickly, trying to distract.

"Yup," Eeteuk says casually, opening the door to its full extent and standing near it. "Go rest up for tomorrow."

You stand up with me without relinquishing my hand, looking at me with the saddest of smiles. I hover in front of you, my eyes locked with yours, my feet lacking the inspiration to step away, my own hand unwilling to let go.

Without giving Eeteuk standing in the doorway another thought, I quickly kiss you and hug you tightly, employing the same logic used by children hiding from nighttime monsters: if I can't see him, he doesn't exist. Your arms come up around me again and hug me back.

"Goodbye," I say into your ear. "I love you very much."

"I love you too," you whisper, your voice catching.

I let go of you to find tears running down your face.

"Bye," you say, cupping my face in your hands and giving me the kiss you shied away from before. Eeteuk clears his throat subtly, but you take your time, drawing it out sweetly before you slowly pull away and give me a small push towards the door. I turn and walk straight out, avoiding Eeteuk's eyes, and leave as quickly as possible. I don't want anyone to see me crying right now.

The feel of your lips pressed so affectionately against mine in parting runs together with the sudden overwhelming realization that we kissed, and told each other that we love each other, in front of Eeteuk. I feel happier about this than I should. Without realizing it until now, I have wanted to feel acknowledged for who I really am by someone whom I'm close to. That you let me confirm my status in front of him, and that you kissed me so blatantly, means something surprisingly significant to me. Now if he had any doubts about us, they're permanently erased.

I wipe my face before I walk inside, pausing only to take my shoes off again and shove them into a box.

"Hyukjae, is th-"

Sungmin stops dead in the entrance way, surprise crossing his delicate features as he sees my face. I walk past him and head directly for my room, shutting the door harder than I had intended, and collapse onto my bed. I turn onto my back and sob, covering my mouth with my hand to mute the sound. I haven't cried like this in a long time. It's just that I feel so lonely all of a sudden, faced with months of promoting - for the first time - without you. It feels wrong, like there's a crucial component to the future that is missing.

I open my cellphone and start at the beginning, looking at pictures I've taken of you over the years and skimming through them until I reach the picture I just took. My mind wanders back, and I wonder how much you must love me to kiss me the way you do and look at me the way you do. When it's just you and me, you're so gentle with me that I feel like I don't want to die; I want to live forever with you and love you just as much in return, every single day.

I want to be able to see through your eyes while you're in China; I hate having to miss out on what you'll see and do and feel. I feel guilty, too, for holding you back. I want you to miss me, but I don't want you to miss me; I want you to think of me, but I want you to forget me; I want you to call me, but I want you to turn your phone off; I want you to be there with me in your heart, but I want you to be free of me, so that you don't feel the pain and loneliness of being apart; I want you to enjoy it without me on your conscience. I don't want to make your experiences less enjoyable simply by not being with you.

If I close my eyes, I can picture you so clearly that I can almost feel your presence. I can imagine you so vividly that my daydreams influence my dreams. I want to call you now and hear your voice, but I'll wait. I don't want to seem that needy, even to myself. I almost laugh and blot my face with my shirt. I am that needy, aren't I? I'm smitten with you.

I remember when you took a picture of us together without my consent, and I got so upset that I cried because you wouldn't erase it, dismissively saying that it was no big deal to keep it. I was afraid that someone would find it. When you saw my tears you stopped teasing me and pulled me close, apologizing. You told me that even though we have to keep our relationship to ourselves, we still have the right to keep pictures, which will turn into memories later when we're older. You compromised with me: you sent it to your laptop and saved it in an encrypted file, and then you let me delete it from your phone with my own hands.

Now I see that you're right, and I'm glad you started the trend of saving pictures secretly. If we didn't, someday we would regret it. We would regret letting the expectations and notions of love that other people carry prevent us from saving them. I'm glad you saw the importance of that and imparted it onto me. I realized that you love us - both of us - and who we become when we're together.

A soft knock brings me out of my thoughts, and I lift my head up. I wait, and the door is opened slowly. Sungmin sticks his head in and looks at me timidly.

"Are you okay?" he asks quietly, slipping into my room and closing the door behind him.

"Yeah, I'm okay," I say, unconvincing even to myself. I sit up and try to smile.

He sits down on my bed and crosses his legs, facing me. His lower lip protrudes as he looks at me with concern. But there's something else besides concern to his expression, I think; he's come here with a purpose.

"Are you sad they're going?" he asks.

I look at him carefully. 'Are you sad he's going?' I'm sure he meant to say. I know him too well not to know that he's really asking about how I feel about you.

"Yeah," I say, running a hand through my hair and sighing tiredly. "But I'm happy for them."

"Yeah, but still. I'll miss Ryeowook and Kyuhyun."

I nod slowly. "You'll have to get used to having your own room again."

"I won't really mind that. Kyuhyun stays up playing games all the time, and it's distracting. But you..." he trails off and looks at me with that shyly determined expression again. I passively wait for him to continue.

"Is Donghae your boyfriend?"

He looks embarrassed after blurting out the question, but I have to admire his determination. I've seen this question coming for a long time. He already knows, I think. By asking me if he's my boyfriend, what he's really saying is that he wants to talk about it. He wants to open this taboo discussion with me.

"Yes," I reply, looking straight at him to show him that I'm not ashamed. "Donghae is my boyfriend."

He looks at me like he doesn't know what to say or do, so after a second he gives up and looks down at his hands, which I now notice are twisted together.

"Do you care?"

"No." He looks up. I can tell that he means it. "I've known that he is for years. But why didn't you tell me?"

"It's complicated."

"But I'm supposed to be your friend."

"Sungmin, would you have told you?" I snap. He looks taken aback, and I try to soften my tone as I continue. "You jealously disliked him once you realized that I liked him, didn't you? What was I supposed to think? That you were comfortable with my being so close to a boy, and that you would be open and accepting if I told you?"

"I'm sorry, okay?" he says edgily. "It isn't like it was that easy for me to watch. I stopped acting like that, too, you know?"

"We didn't want to tell anyone to begin with," I say with a sigh, folding my arms behind my head and leaning back. "After you calmed down, we'd been used to keeping it a secret for a long time. It wasn't like we were waiting for an opportunity to tell you or anyone else."

"I wish you would have told me," he says, fidgeting with his fingers again. He leans against the dresser adjacent to my bed and looks at his knees. He opens his mouth a few times, short gasps of air marking his hesitancy to speak. "How did you know?"

"Know what?"

"That you liked boys."

"I just knew," I say, frowning the slightest bit. "I didn't feel anything thinking about girls. I thought about boys, and...I just knew I liked them. I knew before I met Donghae, if that's what you want to know."

He lowers his chin onto his knees and frowns at the mattress. His index finger draws tiny circles on his shin. I wonder what he wanted me to say, since he seems so dissatisfied with my answer - that I had a boyfriend before Donghae?

"If you've known for a while, why are you bringing it up now?"

"Because," he says. "Donghae is leaving, and you're crying about it. I guess I just wanted you to know that I know, so if...you want someone to know how you feel, you can tell me."

That isn't the answer I was expecting. But his words warm me with their supportiveness, making me in this instant value him as a friend immensely. That he offered to listen to me talk about you means so much to me that I start to cry again.

"Sungmin," I choke. "Thank you."

"I really don't mind," he says, starting to smile. "I know you're really happy with him."

"I love him," I say, blushing because the words feel so unfamiliar.

"I know," he says seriously. "No one can change you two, right? So it would be stupid of me to disapprove. It isn't like your being together is hurting anyone. The other members don't even seem to know."

"Well," I say hesitantly, "Eeteuk and Heechul know."

After your father died and Heechul recovered, you called me and nervously told me that you wanted him to know. I protested initially, but you told me that he mattered to you and that it was important to you that he know, and I gave you my blessing to tell him. You called me again ten minutes later and told me that he had laughed at you and waved you off, saying that it was obvious.

"I thought that Heechul might know," he says. "Just because..."

"Well, he is..." I almost laugh. "I mean, if you thought about us then you must have thought about him."

He laughs. "Of course."

"Did you talk to him, too?"

"No," he says quickly. "I don't know him that well."

"I don't know him well either." Sometimes I wish I did, since you're so close to him. But I think it's a good thing for you to have someone whom only you are close to.

He sighs. "You're really lucky, Hyukjae, you know? The odds were against you, but you found someone to love. I'm a little jealous."

"You'll find someone," I say in a weak attempt to be comforting.

He smiles for a second and then stands up. "If you're alright, we should both get to sleep."

I nod. He bends over and hugs me. I hug him back. Neither of us say anything, and after a few seconds, we let go.

"Goodnight," he says cheerfully. I tell him goodnight, and he leaves, shutting the door softly behind him.

I text you, hoping that you turned your phone to silent, to tell you what just happened. Then I put my phone down, and after a moment's consideration, I decide to take a shower before I go to sleep. I couldn't possibly fall asleep right now, with all of the things on my mind: Sungmin's and Eeteuk's acceptance, your departure, and my own feelings, happiness and sadness mixing together until they reach equilibrium.

The world is alright. We'll live. In a few months, you'll be home, and I'll love you even more.

Eunhae One-shot: April Fool's

aidenrose — Thu, 01 Apr 2010 04:20:16 GMT

Title: April Fool's
Length: One-shot / 573
Genre: Fluff, Romance
Pairing: Eunhyuk / Donghae
Rating: PG
Synopsis: Super Junior plays an early morning prank on Eunhyuk and Donghae.

Hehe, the joke is over~ XD

Thanks to renichifreak for betaing this~!

April Fool's

Beep, beep, beep, beep, bee-

Hyukjae's hand came down hard on the plastic alarm clock, silencing it with a harsh slapping sound that made Donghae wince for the poor alarm clock.

Hyukjae fell back down on the bed again, letting out a slow stream of curse words directed at its existence and rubbing his eyes. Donghae dragged the blanket up over their heads and sighed sleepily, putting his arm across Hyukjae's body.

"Get up," Hyukjae said insincerely, "we have to go."

"Later," Donghae breathed.

"The alarm went off," he moaned incoherently, his words slurred together by drowsiness.

Donghae opened his eyes slowly and put his hands over Hyukjae's ears.

"Pretend you didn't hear it," he said, nuzzling his head into Hyukjae's shoulder.

"I did hear it."

"No." Donghae smiled and put his hand over Hyukjae's eyes, closing them like as effectively as a sleeping mask. Hyukjae sighed and drifted in and out of sleep for a minute, the warmth of his bed and the other boy's body pressed closely against his like a soft cloud filling his head, insisting upon his falling asleep again.

"Donghae," he said, turning onto his stomach and burying his face in his pillow.

"Mm?"

"You know we have to get up, don't you?"

"Mm-hm."

Donghae sat up on his elbows and blinked blearily at the window. It was still dark outside. His eyes fell on Hyukjae and he played with his hair, running his fingers down to his neck and rubbing it gently, resisting the temptation to lay his head down on his shoulder and go back to sleep.

"Come on," he said softly, kissing the middle of his back.

"Don't want to," he moaned. "Too tired."

"I'm tired too." He rested his forehead on him.

"Screw schedules," Hyukjae said bitterly, pushing himself up. He sat on the edge of the bed and reached for the lamp blindly, searching for the switch for a whole minute before finding it and turning it on. He stood up, almost falling over as he reoriented himself to being vertical.

He walked to the door and opened it. He took a step out and then his eyes found the sand bag on the floor. He stared at the lines of ribbons leading up from it, too tired to be surprised by anything.

"What the hell is this?" Hyukjae squinted at the bunch of balloons hovering outside his door.

"What is it?" Donghae asked from the bed, shielding his eyes from the light.

Warily, Hyukjae reached forward and pulled a balloon down by a note taped to it.

April Fool's! Go back to sleep!

He blankly stared at the note, his mouth slightly ajar. April Fool's?

He shut the door and banged his forehead against it. Donghae laughed uncertainly and asked him what was going on again.

He turned around and fell back onto the bed, fuming.

"I hate everyone," Hyukjae moaned into his pillow. "What day is it today?"

"April first...?"

Hyukjae looked up at him and waited for him to make the mental connection. Donghae laughed after a moment and hid his face in his palm, wearing an embarrassed smile. Hyukjae took a deep breath and pulled the blanket back up.

They looked at each other, and Hyukjae leaned over him to kiss him. Donghae caught his hand and twined their fingers together as Hyukjae curled up next to him again.

"Dream of a way to get back at them."

Polychromatic Us: Chapter Six

aidenrose — Thu, 25 Mar 2010 04:45:18 GMT

Title: Polychromatic Us
Part: Chapter Six: Black
Previous Parts: Chapter One, Chapter Two, Chapter Three, Chapter Four, Chapter Five
Genre: Romance
Pairing: Donghae / Eunhyuk
Rating: PG-13 (sensuality)
Word Count: 3,780
Synopsis: Colors have always been there in our relationship...from the day I met you. If I were to tell our story, I’d do it with a canvas and paint; vibrant colors of every shade and hue.
Next Update: Sunday, April 18, 2010 (barring no extreme writer's block...I know it's kind of long, but I don't have as much time ;~~; )

I'm so sorry that this is three months late. There is a whole list of reasons as to why it took me so long to write this, but I'll offer up a (semi) brief explanation. I mixed up some dates and thought that I could no longer write this part of the story, so instead I was working on a substitute chapter (and failing miserably - that thing went through seven re-writes) and planning on finishing this one later and posting it as a bonus. However, that is no longer the case. The mistake I thought I made, I actually did not make at all. Once I realized that and started working on this chapter again, it was pretty easy to get my thoughts out. Hopefully from here on out it will be a smooth writing process again. I was actually so upset by the mistake I thought I made that I felt like I had ruined this series, and I was really kind of...crushed. ^^; So I was soooo relieved when I realized that I didn't mess up like I thought I had. ^_^

Please give this a try - you might win a drabble from me! :D

Also, this community is where I will be posting all of my personal fics from here on out. I will still be posting collaborative fics at with tvxqsocks at interrobangfics , though. ^^

Thanks to tvxqsocks for betaing this! ^^

Please read and enjoy! ^ ^ /

Black

"Sorry to leave you here," Eeteuk says quietly, shrugging on a thin white hoodie and stuffing his wallet into his back pocket, "but it'd be good if you stayed behind with him."

"It's okay," I say just as quietly. "I'll stay."

He looks at me as if studying me, the way I'm sitting on the couch like a statue, wearing your clothes. I came straight back to your dorm after the funeral, so I didn't have anything of my own to change into. I look back at him until he drops his gaze, wearing a small enigmatic smile.

"You understand him well.”

"Yes."

"Must be nice to have a friend like you," he mutters, turning away.

I can't help but smile a bit at how understated his comment is. If only you knew, I think at him. If only he knew why I'm sitting here instead of going down to my bed to get much needed sleep. If he knew what kind of relationship we have, he would never apologize for leaving me here with you. I’m here right now because I have nowhere else to be, because I love you, and because something terrible has happened. I’m not going to leave. I want to be here if you need me.

Everything feels stupid and meaningless to me - all of the small fights and insecurities that have preoccupied cumulative days of thought - what was all of that for?

"Bye," Eeteuk says from the door, following the other members who are going to see Heechul out. I just wave in response and let them go.

I keep myself from sleeping by thinking of you, drowning the rest of the world out with my one single care. I don't feel guilty for staying here instead of going to the hospital, because I'm too worried about you to let my feelings be torn. I can't help Heechul, but I can be here for you. I sink down into the couch and wait, thinking that when you come out of the shower I'll make sure you know that I'm here.

A small pang of alarm hits me, like a safety pin pushed through the wall of my heart, and I open my eyes and sit up, suddenly alert.

How long has the shower been on?

I scramble to my feet and walk quickly to the bathroom. Don't be locked, don't be locked, don't be locked. I turn the handle and exhale as the door opens. I close it behind me, listening, and then take two steps into the bathroom, looking at the shower.

"Donghae?"

I wait. When I don't get a reply, I hesitantly open the shower door. You're sitting with your head on your knees under the shower, curled into as tight a ball as you could manage, hugging yourself. You don't look up at me or even show me that you're aware I'm here. My heart aches indescribably, seeing you like this.

"Are you okay?" It seems like a stupid question to ask; you're so obviously not okay. But what am I supposed to say?

You don't reply, as if you've gone deaf and haven't heard me. I put my hand out and feel the temperature of the water. Thankfully, it's still warm. Without giving it a second thought, I step into the shower, sure that you wouldn't come out even if I begged you to, and close the door. I sit down next to you and put my arms around you. You're shaking, but I don't think it's because you're cold; you must be crying.

"I love you," I say quietly, laying my head down across your shoulders. "I'm sorry."

Minutes pass, and I close my eyes and let the water run over both of us, wishing that it would wash away the past couple of days. I wonder why you're hiding here. Maybe you're drowning out the noise in your head with the constant drum of the shower, mimicking the rain, calming you. Maybe this is the only place that you felt you wouldn't be disturbed, when you're too grief-stricken to face anyone. You won't even face me.

"When the water gets cold," I say, turning my lips against your skin, "let's leave. Okay?"

You nod, and I kiss you once between your neck and shoulder. Time will help you, I know...so I wish you didn't have to move on so quickly. I wish you had all the time in the world you needed in which to grieve. You'll probably grieve in secret for a long time, but you'll put on a smile and pretend to be alright for everyone else as soon as you can. I hope that you'll show me your true feelings, even though I'd like to think that I know you well enough by now to know them even if you don't tell me.

The water is getting cooler. I wait until it starts getting really cold, and then I stand up, turn off the water, and gently pull you to your feet. You look exhausted, your eyes red and swollen and seemingly unwilling to focus. You meet my eyes, and I shake my head and kiss your cheek, cupping your face in my hands for a second. I know you haven't been sleeping well.

I step out of the shower and grab a towel off of the shelf. I step into the shower again, glancing back at the puddles of water on the tile left by my soaked clothes, and dry your hair for you. When I deem it to be dry enough, I drape the towel around your shoulders.

"I'm sorry," you say quietly, your voice hoarse from crying. I just kiss you and force you to hold the towel around yourself. I strip down to my boxer shorts and wring the clothes out and hang them over the shower door as I exit it. I glance at you, and you pull the towel from your shoulders and dry yourself off.

"Are we alone?"

"Yes," I say, drying myself off and meeting your eyes in the mirror. "Everyone went to the hospital, to see Heechul."

I know as soon as I've said it that I shouldn't have. You lower your face into your hand and start crying again. I turn and gather you into my arms and hold you, stroking your wet hair.

"Hyukjae, what if he dies?"

"He won't," I say, even though I know that he might.

"I should have gone too," you moan, clinging to me.

"You should stay here," I say quietly, blinking back tears. "You need to rest."

"But what if he..." you hold onto me more tightly, your face pressed into my shoulder. "What if he doesn't...?"

"They'll call."

"I should go," you say again, shaking your head and pulling away.

"Look, it's not your obligation to go! Heechul will understand. And anyway, he's in surgery right now - you wouldn't be able to see him even if you were there."

You slide down the wall and sob quietly, using your towel to absorb your tears. I get down beside you again and try to comfort you, trying not to cry myself. I've never seen you look more vulnerable, afraid, or sad. If there's a day when I'm angry at God, it's today.

"Hyukjae," you say huskily, looking up at me and biting your lip so hard that I’m afraid you’ll break the skin.

"What is it?"

"I want to wake up," you almost whisper, looking right into my eyes, appealing to me as if I could just pinch you and make it all go away.

"This isn't a dream," I say, wishing it were. "I'm sorry."

"It feels like a nightmare."

"I know." I brush your tears away with my fingertips, keeping your face gently lifted in my hands. You lean your cheek into my palm, closing your eyes.

"I wish it were," you cry softly.

"Me too."

"But it is," you say despairingly, starting to sob again. "This is a living nightmare."

I guide your arms over my shoulders and around my neck, holding you tightly in my mine. There isn't much else I can do. It isn't as though I can change what has happened. I can feel you trying to wipe away your tears, but we both know it's a losing battle. I don't expect you to stop crying all night. Even if you do, I won't expect it to last.

I help you up and give you as tender a kiss as I can manage before you go to your room. I pull the clothes you lent me off of the shower door and throw them into the dryer on my way to your room as well. Any other day, we would both laugh about my having to borrow two sets of clothes in the same evening, but nothing is funny right now. I don't have the confidence in myself to try to make anything funny, either. Neither of us say a word as we get dressed.

You take my hand and lead me out into the living room, muttering something about wanting to feel like part of a family. You lie with your head on my lap on the couch, still holding my hand. I use my other hand to brush your hair behind your ear and stroke your face gently, looking down at you through vision blurred with tears. If I had imagined this happening, I would never have been able to imagine the amount of sympathy and pain I feel for you.

"I'm so sorry," I murmur, squeezing your hand gently. "Donghae, I'm so sorry."

You squeeze my hand in response. I don't know what else to do, so for a long time, I don't do much of anything but let you be. Sometimes I touch you, but mostly I just offer up my presence. This is about you and your loss, but I want a place in it, because you matter to me.

"Do you want anything?" I ask after a while.

"I'm kind of thirsty," you say, turning onto your back and looking up at me. "Hyukjae, aren't you tired?"

"Aren't you?" I echo.

"I don't want to go to sleep," you choke. "How can I sleep?"

"Why can't you?" My eyes fall on the dark circles beneath your eyes.

"Guilt." You give a little shrug. "I know the world won't change if I fall asleep. But how can I sleep now? I mean, Heechul is in surgery, and everyone is there waiting for a doctor to come out and tell them how it went."

"If you really want to go to the hospital, I'll take you," I say quietly.

"No.” You sigh heavily. “I don't have the energy to."

"Tomorrow, then. We'll go. Okay?"

You nod, and I slip out from beneath you. I can feel you watching me as I heat some water and make you a cup of tea. Odd as it sounds, I wish I had experienced this kind of grief before, so I would know exactly how you feel and how to help you.

I don't want you to go the hospital right now; I don't want to show reserve in the way I treat you. I know that if it was my father that had died, my beloved friend that had just been severely injured in a car crash, I would want you to be with me. Really with me, without holding back.

You sit up with your knees pulled into your chest when I bring you the tea, and hold it over them, waiting for it to cool. I sit down beside you and put my arm around your shoulders. You lean your head into the crook between my neck and shoulder, your eyelashes brushing my skin every time you blink.

"Thank you for staying," you murmur.

"Don't be silly," I murmur back. "I'll stay as long as you need me to."

"Stay the night."

For a second, my heart contracts with anxiety, a reaction that has been ingrained into me by every time we've slept together. Save for the times you came into my room in the mornings and fell asleep in my bed, when they just took it as a hiding place for you to get 'five more minutes', I've worried about being understood by the other members. How many times is too many?

"Okay," I say.

"Why is sleeping together important?" you ask softly, as if this is the first time you've ever thought about it.

I haven't thought about it, either.

"Because..." I chew on my bottom lip, thinking it over. Why is it important? Maybe it's just the duration of time spent close together that makes it significant. I always feel safe sleeping with you, once I get past worrying about being found out. I like sleeping with you because I like touching you, the way your body feels, using your heartbeat and breath as a lullaby. It's comforting to fall asleep with the person I'm always worrying about, because I know where you are. Exactly where I want you.

"I think I know why," you say thoughtfully. "It's because you can have sex with anyone, kiss anyone, hug anyone. But to choose to just sleep with another human being in your arms, I think you have to love that person."

"We don't need to sleep together to prove that." I kiss the top of your head.

"Of course not," you say, lifting your head off my shoulder to drink. "But it's sweet."

"Eeteuk won't mind?"

"Are you kidding?" You glance at me sideways. "If there's a person here who doesn't give a damn about you sleeping over, it's Eeteuk. He knows I love you."

"Knows how?"

You shrug. "I don't know. But he knows I love you."

"I'm glad you don't want me to leave."

You give me a weird look. "Why would I want you to leave?"

"I thought you might have wanted to be left alone."

"Not by you."

You set the cup down and fall back against the cushions. After a minute you meet my eyes and then press your fingers into your eyes, stopping tears. I pull your hands away from your face and you curl up against my side, your head back on my shoulder.

"I hate this," you moan, your fingers curling to grip my - your - t-shirt. "I didn't want this to happen."

I want to say I know or of course not, but the words won't come. I just nod and link my fingers together around you.

"He didn't...he didn't get to..." you break off and take a deep breath. "He didn't even get to see me perform."

"I know," I manage. I can't bear the brokenheartedness in your voice.

"This was his dream, too. Hyukjae, I feel so guilty."

That surprises me. I push you away so I can see your face, leaving my hands on your shoulders. You look at me like you're confessing something terrible and asking for forgiveness. Like you've done something wrong.

"What do you mean?"

You shrug and take another deep breath. "I don't know. Like maybe if I had worked harder and debuted sooner, he might have been able to see me on stage in person."

"No one works harder than you. Don't think like that. How could you have debuted faster?"

You shrug again.

"He was so proud of you. You know that."

"I know."

"This is hard enough on you already," I say, trying to sound gentle. "Don't make it harder by making yourself feel guilty."

You nod shallowly and dry your face with your t-shirt.

"I'm serious."

"I know. I get it."

You put out your arms and wrap them around my waist. At some point we end up lying down, and it's an effort to not fall asleep. Every now and again you talk, expressing some thought about your father or how you feel. Sometimes you tell me brief, tearful stories about him from when you were a kid, the things you remember and cherish the most. Two hours pass in this way, waiting for a call from Eeteuk or the key to turn in the lock.

Eventually, my cellphone vibrates on the table, and we both turn our heads and look at it. I reach for it and barely manage to touch it with my fingers to drag it closer. I pick it up and answer it, rubbing my eyes as you sit up, your knees on either side of me.

"Hello?"

"Hyukjae." It's Eeteuk. "It's good news; Heechul will be okay."

I exhale, smiling, and you relax as soon as you see my expression. "Thank goodness."

"He'll be out of commission for a while," he says. "But he's okay."

I listen to him list Heechul's injuries in an admirably calm voice. My own body hurts listening to him, but the most important thing is that he's alive, and he'll recover. He says he'll be back early in the morning and that some of the others will be back in an hour, and then he asks if you're there.

"I'll put him on," I say and hold the phone to your ear. Your fingers close over mine, holding my hand and the phone to your head, and you keep your eyes locked on mine as you listen to Eeteuk. A relieved smile, the first I've seen in a while, crosses your features, and you close your eyes. I want to get so close to you that I’d be able feel your relief as my own, know what your own smile feels like to you, and see if your thoughts and feelings are as beautiful as I imagine. I want to directly feel love, without the space between looks or words.

"Thanks," you say. "I'll come tomorrow to see him, so if he wakes up and they let you see him, please let him know, okay?"

You say goodbye and lower your hand. I close the phone without seeing if Eeteuk is still there and put it back down on the table.

"He's okay." Your smile widens for a moment. "He'll be okay."

I nod, more grateful and relieved than words can express, and I know you must be feeling ten times what I feel.

"Come on," you say quietly, standing up and pulling me to my feet.

You close the door behind us in your room. The only source of light in the room is your fish-shaped nightlight, softly illuminating our silhouettes. I like this room - even Eeteuk's half of it, because it's white and clean; I love neatness.

You turn towards me and kiss me, caressing the sides of my face with tired gentleness, but a kind of insistence beneath it, as if making a point. You draw me down onto the bed beside you, putting your arms around my waist as you kiss me.

I kiss you back, sliding my hands beneath your shirt, clinging to the feel of your skin and my perennial longing to be with you. We fall back, you above me, my heart beating faster with every shared breath and movement of our bodies. Just as you slip your hand beneath my waistband, your tongue caressing mine closely, though, you stop, and sit up on the edge of the bed.

"Sorry," you say quietly, leaning your forehead into your hand as if embarrassed. "I can't do this tonight, after all."

"It's okay," I say breathlessly, lying back against your pillow and staring at the ceiling. "I wasn't expecting you to want to."

You nod and cover your face with your hands, taking a deep breath and leaning on your elbows. I sit up and smooth my clothing out, push my bangs back, and breathe, trying to calm myself down.

"He didn't know," you say with an air of suddenness, looking back at me. "My dad. He didn't know about you."

"At all?"

You shake your head.

“But I...” You make a helpless, frustrated movement. “I really wanted to tell him someday.”

We look at each other, and you turn back towards me and kiss my cheek.

"Now I can't," you say, your tone painfully flat. I watch as your eyes fill with tears and you smile sadly at me. "But maybe that's for the best, right?"

"What to say?" I whisper after a few seconds, wiping my eyes with my thumb.

"Don't say anything," you whisper back, kissing my cheek again. "There's nothing to say."

"I'm sorry," I say, touching your hand shyly. "I'm really sorry."

You pull back the comforter from beneath me and fluff your pillow, and without looking at me, say that you are too.

"Do you still want me to sleep here tonight?"

You glance at me and then lie down beside me and gently pull me back down. "Yes."

“I wish I could change this...take your pain away, alter time, anything.”

“You do,” you say, putting your arms around me and laying your head down next to mine. “How would I deal without you? You’re the most precious person I have.”

“I love you,” I say, every syllable catching with tears.

"I love you,” you repeat, your voice equally emotional.

A quiet moment passes, and then you admit to being afraid of dreaming tonight. I laugh sadly and forbid you to. You nod, wishing me sweet dreams. I shut my heavy eyelids and snuggle in close to you. It's okay for me to want to be loved, to want to be the recipient of affection, isn't it? Even today.

I'm not sure if it was you or I who fell asleep first, or if we simultaneously drifted away. I just know that I fell asleep with you, wrapped up into one person, wishing impossible things and ultimately letting myself feel just a little bit happy, even under the circumstances.

Sometime during the night, I become aware of Eeteuk coming into the room, and somewhere in my mind I know that he looks at us long and hard, as if analyzing what he sees, but I don't care. I decide to let the world do whatever it wants, because trying to stop it isn't going to work - ever. Things just have a way of happening, fortunate or not; like the way I met you, the way your father passed away, and the way that Heechul got into a car accident on the same night as his funeral. I turn over after Eeteuk turns off the light, the line of my back fitting perfectly against your chest, my fingers brushing yours as they hang over my waist, and fall asleep again.

[Next Part] Chapter Seven: Purple

Request Post

aidenrose — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 21:53:35 GMT

If you would like to request a fic from me, please comment on this post. ^^

Comments are screened. Please read this post before you request something:

I will not accept a request if I feel that I cannot write the prompt or pairing well (a good example of a pairing I will most likely refuse is KiHae), but I will try my best to accept every request. I cannot, unfortunately, provide a deadline on finishing a request (such as two weeks), because I am busy with school and my series are my top priority.

Please comment with:

♡Your desired pairing(s).

♡Your prompt. If you do not provide a prompt in your request, I will not write it. A one-word prompt, a phrase, a long detailed prompt, or a songfic prompt is fine to use as your prompt. As long as you have one.

♡Your desired genre. You don't have to include this if you don't want to, but if you want angst, for example, please let me know so I don't write you fluff instead. I will not write smut. Please do not ask for it.

♡A username if you are requesting a fic for someone else.

♡Anything else you think is noteworthy, or anything you are uncomfortable with.

Please do not comment anonymously unless you do not have a livejournal account. If for some reason you don't want to be credited in the fic post, please include that in your comment, and I will not credit you.

Okay, I think that's it! ^ ^ /

Master List

aidenrose — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 21:09:23 GMT

This list is alphabetically organized.

Fic type (drabble / mult.chap / oneshot) -> Pairing -> Fics.

Finished series have a ❤ below the list of chapters.

All of my collaborative fics are at interrobangfics ‽

Miracle 100 SuJu Challenge (003/100): Archive Post

Multiple Chapter:

EunHae:

Happy Days; With You:
Genre: Romance
Rating: PG-13 (sensuality)
Synopsis: Donghae returns from China and comes to realize his true feelings towards Eunhyuk in a relationship that transcends friendship.
Prologue: Away From You
Chapter One: Nice To See You
Chapter Two: Cup of Coffee and Rain, Rain, Rain
Chapter Three: Medication
Chapter Four: Trigonometry and Bubble Tea
Chapter Five: Reexamination of the Heart
Chapter Six: It's You
Chapter Seven: Happy Days
Chapter Eight: Black Coffee and Vanilla Ice Cream
Chapter Nine: No Reason to Cry
Chapter Ten: Better Than a Nightlight
Chapter Eleven: With You
❤

HaeHyuk:

Polychromatic Us:
Genre: Romance
Rating: PG-13 (sensuality)
Synopsis: Colors have always been there in our relationship...from the day I met you. If I were to tell our story, I’d do it with a canvas and paint; vibrant colors of every shade and hue.
Chapter One: White
Chapter Two: Yellow
Chapter Three: Blue
Chapter Four: Red
Chapter Five: Orange
Chapter Six: Black
Chapter Seven: Purple
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen

One-shots:

EunHae:

Title: April Fool's
Genre: Fluff, Romance
Rating: PG
Synopsis: Super Junior plays an early morning prank on Eunhyuk and Donghae.

Title: Count Hyukula
Genre: Fluff, Romance, Comedy
Rating: PG
Synopsis: Eunhyuk tries to pull a Halloween prank on Donghae...as Count Hyukula!

Title: Fish for the Fishy
Genre: Fluff
Rating: G
Synopsis: Eunhyuk is taking Donghae on a secret trip - blindfolded!

Title: Snow
Genre: Romance
Rating: PG
Synopsis: Donghae is left all alone in a snowstorm until Eunhyuk comes back to visit him.

Title: Strawberry Cake
Genre: Fluff
Rating: G
Synopsis: Donghae hides a cake for Hyukjae thinking that he won't know it's from him, but when Hyukjae figures it out, what will happen?

Title: Strawberry Milk
Genre: Fluff, Romance
Rating: PG
Synopsis: Donghae is jealous of Eunhyuk's love of strawberry milk?!

Title: Strawberry Mocha
Genre: Fluff
Rating: G
Synopsis: Eunhyuk ~~cheats on Donghae with a strawberry mocha~~ comes back to his room to find Donghae waiting for him.

Title: White Christmas
Genre: Fluff
Rating: PG
Synopsis: After Eunhyuk laughed at Donghae for decorating a Christmas tree by himself, Donghae guilted Eunhyuk into promising to decorate the entire dorm in secret early Christmas morning.

HaeHyuk:

Title: Assigned Seating
Genre: Fluff
Rating: G
Synopsis: Assigned seating on an airplane has separated Donghae and Eunhyuk, to Eunhyuk's disappointment.

Title: He Snores, But He's Yours
Genre: Fluff, Romance
Rating: PG-13
Synopsis: Eunhyuk has to deal with Donghae's snoring.

Title: Valentine's Day
Genre: Romance, Comedy
Rating: PG
Synopsis: Hyukjae receives an anonymous letter on Valentine's Day (how original this synopsis is... >_>).

HaeHyuk One-shot: Valentine's Day

aidenrose — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 19:52:16 GMT

Title: Valentine's Day
Length: One-shot / 3,157
Genre: Romance, Comedy
Pairing: Donghae / Eunhyuk
Rating: PG
Synopsis: Hyukjae receives an anonymous letter on Valentine's Day (how original this synopsis is... >_>).

I really wanted to write this for Valentine's Day, but when it actually came around I had writer's block...But it's too fun a prompt to let go, so it's belated. ^^; I had so much fun writing it. Please read and enjoy! ^ ^ /

Thanks to tvxqsocks for betaing it. ^^

Valentine's Day

Hyukjae couldn't remember a time when he didn't know that the saddest thing in love is unrequited love. Since he was in kindergarten, he had suffered the blows of unrequited playground crushes. In middle school it only got worse, when he started to get crushes on boys. He felt like the main character of a melodramatic tragedy, the shy and slim (not to mention handsome) youth that looked upon his love interests from afar with, almost beautifully, no choice but to abstain from them.

It wasn't much of a surprise that he related so well to the scores of dramas, plays, novels, movies, lyrics and poetry dedicated to the broken heart and irreversible circumstance of sorry, I just don't like you. The result of his fascination with the melodramatic and romantic was that he himself became a bit of a romantic teenager, lost in daydreams where the people he liked confessed their hidden heart palpitations to him, and they lived happily ever after together.

He was by no means a loner, of course. It was nearly impossible for someone as talented and handsome as him to not make friends in a high school where talent and looks alike were valued. He actually knew both sides of the razor-sharp blade known as romance; girls often confessed to him. Really pretty, sweet, smart girls. He went out with one once, but it failed miserably because he couldn't rouse enough interest in her to make dates fun. He just wasn't into girls.

Any time a cute boy walked past him with his top shirt buttons undone during breaks, his bag held casually over his shoulder, his wrist bent just so, it caught his attention and made him blush and more if he wasn't careful. This year was particularly bad; a crazy beautiful boy had transferred into his class from Mokpo and caught his eye as strongly as if he had hooked it. He had such a crush on him that he thanked the universe daily that he wasn't sitting next to him.

Everyone liked this new boy, Lee Donghae. He was like an energetic puppy full of good intentions set loose on the class; just impossible not to like. He had everything and more that made Hyukjae popular, too - good looks, good grades, and he could sing and dance, whereas Hyukjae felt that he could only dance well. Of course, Hyukjae had only heard by word of mouth that he could sing well, because Hyukjae would never allow himself near him for long enough to hear him sing. He was sure that the sound of his beautiful voice singing would be enough to make him die of a broken heart for real.

Girls loved him especially, and as far as Hyukjae could see, he loved girls, too. They flocked to him like birds, and he smiled at all of them and talked with them about...well, he didn't know what they talked about. But it was always very animated, and when he braved glances over at them, it looked a lot like show and tell, girls always bringing things out of their bags and showing him. He had to admire his patience to go along with that - who could care so much about girls' hair clips and photographs of idols? Unless the idols were boys, he thought dreamily, his chin slipping off of his hand.

It was lucky for him that he wasn't forced to interact with him too much. He was only subjected to hearing his friends express their grudging admiration towards him; they couldn't exactly dislike such a likable person just because the girls liked him so much. When they complained about it, Hyukjae morosely reminded them that Donghae couldn't date all of them, and this was usually enough to make them shut up for a while.

Hyukjae dreaded the day that his friends broke the ice with Donghae and became his friends, too. Once that happened, who knew what kind of sledge hammer would crush his heart? A deep blow he wasn't unfamiliar with - being forced to spend time with your crush when they don't like you. Few things would be more awkward, he thought, than being caught staring at him over lunch and asked what his interest was in the way he chewed.

His female friends already knew the boy well. They didn't talk to Hyukjae much about him, though, because that was awkward. Plus, a girl telling a boy she likes about a boy she likes doesn't work when the boy she likes doesn't care that the she likes another boy. He shook his head at the scenarios of the past and blew a kiss to his inability to get jealous.

A day was soon approaching when his feelings would take another plummet: Valentine's Day. Every year it presented him with another opportunity to remember everyone he had ever had a crush, and wallow in self-pity. He would sigh at the bubbling romances going on around him, and huddle in the figurative corner with everyone else who didn't get the valentine they wanted. Then he would damn his genetic makeup and cry on the shoulder of a rejected girl in the back of art class in the afternoon, and together they would feel marginally better about their circumstances.

The worst part, though, was that he would be bombarded with cards and chocolates from admiring girls. Sometimes he thought it would be better if he just removed himself from society - no girls would like him, and he wouldn't see any boys to like, either. Tempting as it was, he had a little more hope for his college days. Full steam ahead through math and science towards those exams.

For a few years, he had thought that Valetine's Day was a brilliant day; he received free chocolate and compliments. Hard not to like, really, but after a while it got old, and he started to feel bad for the purses of the people who bought him gifts. They were wasting their efforts, but he couldn't exactly tell them that he wasn't attracted to girls. He had learned to come up with more creative excuses, like I'm allergic to your perfume, but please don't ever stop wearing it because I know this guy who loves it. Yes, him over there. Go get him, tiger.

This particular Valentine's Day, the Valentine's Day of his second year in high school, he made his way to his classroom, sat down at his desk, and used his arms as a pillow. Pretending to sleep was the perfect way to avoid his classmates as long as possible. He dreaded the rest of the day, dreaded rejecting the girls who would confess to him, dreaded the nervous atmosphere that was already starting to fill the school, but most of all dreaded feeling left out of it all. He wouldn't run back to his friends, overjoyed and smiling, because the person he liked confessed to him. It just wasn't going to happen.

He shifted onto his other cheek, looking up at the clock first and then sneaking a glance at the object of his desire, who was sitting tapping his desk with a nervous energy. Who knows why, Hyukjae thought as he closed his eyes again and dozed until class began.

He carried his gloomy mood through all of his classes until lunch time, when the confessions began from girls who caught him in the corridors and shyly told him how they liked him. He rejected them as graciously as he could, accepting their gifts and thanking them. He hated to make people cry. He passed the day in such a way, viewing the end of the day as the blue sky at the end of a dark and narrow tunnel.

He collapsed on his bed that night, staring at the ceiling blankly for a whole ten minutes before sitting up and retrieving his school bag from the floor. He brought his two boxes of chocolate out from it and set them in a stack on his desk, briefly wondering if he could pass them off as gifts to other people. His eyes filled with tears as he looked at them, and he sniffled and hid his face in a tissue. A mere five seconds later he grimaced and sat down at his desk, reaching in again for his homework.

He paused as his fingers closed over an envelope, and he drew it out and looked at it in horror. Someone must have slipped it into his bag while he wasn't around. He almost moaned as he sat back in his chair and looked at it. It was a plain letter, without any fancy hearts or squiggles drawn over it, and only had his name written on the front. He considered throwing it away, but that seemed disrespectful.

He opened the envelop and drew out a carefully folded piece of ordinary notebook paper. He opened it, and out fell another folded piece of paper onto his lap. He picked it up and looked at it; it was a gift certificate for a local chocolate shop. He glanced between it and the letter and then quickly moved on to reading it.

Happy Valentine's Day, Lee Hyukjae!

I don't know what kind of chocolate you like, so please use this gift certificate to get your favorite kind. If you go out with me I promise I'll make Valentine's Day more original each year.

I think you know who I am, but you would probably never guess who I am from this letter. I thank the technological age for never having had an opportunity to show you my handwriting before. But if, by some special chance, you do figure out who I am, please don't mention this to me unless you think you like me. I mean it would be nice if you were sure you liked me, but thinking you like me is okay too. As long as you don't lead me on, okay? Don't mention it to me if you're just curious or something. I have a sensitive heart. But really, if you do figure out who I am and you do like me, please please please talk to me, because I like you a lot.

xoxo

He frowned, intrigued by its anonymity, and read it again. It was kind of cute and sweet, he thought sadly, and it set itself apart from the rest he had received by not containing any praise. The person who wrote it didn't want to be known? Strange. It didn't sound as if they were going to approach him later, hands clasped beneath their chin innocently, to ask him if he'd received a letter, and oh yes, it was them, but they were just too shy to write their name. He zoned out. Had that ever happened to him? No, he'd just seen that in anime.

"Girl, girl, girl, girl," he said under his breath as he counted his spoils and remembered the confessions he'd gotten earlier, his eyes coming to rest on the letter again. "Girl...?"

His mind and stomach did a backflip. What if it wasn't a girl, and that was why it was anonymous? What if there was another boy-loving boy hidden in the catacombs of his school, stealing glances at him while he wasn't looking and fantasizing about him during his breaks and history classes? What would he look like? Where would he be? The audacity of putting a letter in his schoolbag!

He scrutinized the handwriting, and it was true that he didn't recognize it. Maybe he could show it to people in his class and ask if they recognized it? But then again, if they did recognize it, that might expose the author when the author didn't want to be known to anyone. But then again, the author clearly wanted to go out with him. But what if he searched for the author only to find out that it was a girl?

He sighed. The odds of it being a boy were slim to say the least. Maybe he should just forget it about it and move on, he thought, and soon decided that forgetting about it would be the best course of action. He folded it back into its envelope and put it in his desk drawer. But it stayed with him during the two weeks that followed, like a gnat, flying around his head and reminding him that somewhere in the school, there was an unknown person that liked him.

One day he was hiding up on the roof, sitting against the wall hunched down into his scarf and jacket and and glaring up at the sky, willing the sun to shine with more warmth. Some days he just wanted to be alone, and the roof was the best place for that in school. Not only could he be alone, he could also breathe in fresh air and feel the sun. It was completely peaceful, he decided, hunkering down into his clothing more. Soon it would be even pleasanter as the weather warmed up.

The door to the roof opened with a bang, and none other than Lee Donghae tumbled through the doorway and stood up out of a somersault, dusting himself off. Hyukjae stared, unsure of whether he should blush or just stare as he closed the door and stretched in the sun. What was he doing? Training to be a ninja?

Donghae spotted him mid-stretch and dropped his arms quickly. Hyukjae felt his heart explode; was Donghae blushing? Of course he was, he answered himself, blushing in turn. He had just been caught pulling off a silly stunt like catapulting through a doorway. Really, what had he expected? It wasn't impossible that more people would be up here. Hyukjae narrowed his eyes for a second and then gave a little wave. Donghae waved back and then shoved his hands into his pockets.

Why was he acting so weirdly? Hyukjae looked away for a second, and when he looked back, Donghae was still standing there like a statue, his cheeks burning, staring directly at Hyukjae. The look on his face made Hyukjae want to disappear.

"Hi," he said shyly, taking a hesitant step forward. "What are you doing up here?"

"Practicing invisibility," Hyukjae answered.

"Ah." Donghae paused, wavering between another step. "How's that going?"

"Not well, as you can see." Hyukjae giggled in his head. Get it? As you can see?

Donghae laughed. "That's funny."

Is it? Hyukjae wanted to ask, followed by a sudden desire to leap into Donghae's arms and be spun around. If Donghae thought he was funny, they must be perfect for each other.

"So, um."

"Yeah?" Hyukjae debated whether he should stand up or not. But as it was, his scarf was conveniently covering his cheeks.

"Nothing." Donghae shrugged. "Aren't you kind of cold?"

"Cold?" Hyukjae blinked. "I guess. A little bit."

Donghae blushed even more, fueling the fire of Hyukjae's cheeks again. What is this? Hyukjae wondered, his head spinning. They were just saying awkward things and blushing at each other up here on the roof. Oh my god. This is perfect. What a perfect setting in which Donghae could confess his feelings and drop to his knees before him and tenderly warm his hands with his own! What a romantic gesture it would be, so early in their relationship. No, at any time! He could do that any time, and it would make Hyukjae love him.

"I just came up here to get some air," Donghae said, nodding quickly. "I didn't...I mean, I didn't know...you were here."

Hyukjae's heart shot to the floor. He opened his mouth to apologize or tell him he could leave - he hadn't actually decided which he should say - but was cut short by Donghae suddenly turning around and grabbing the door handle.

"Wait!" Hyukjae called, scrambling to his feet.

Donghae looked over his shoulder, his hand frozen, holding the handle tightly.

"Um. You don't have to leave."

"It's okay," Donghae said in what Hyukjae imagined to be a pained tone. My god, he thought, he must either love me or hate me!

"Did you..." Hyukjae blushed and ran a hand through his hair, caught by a sudden inspiration. "Did you write me a letter?"

"A-a-a l-letter?" Donghae stammered, his hand slipping off of the handle.

"Yes," Hyukjae answered, feeling suddenly more confident. If he hadn't, why would he answer so nervously?

"Uh..."

"You did, didn't you?" Oh please let him say yes.

"Well..." He took in a huge breath of air and turned around. "Yes."

"You did?" Hyukjae almost squeaked. "I don't believe this!"

Donghae nodded, covering his cheeks with his hands.

"I only did it because everyone encouraged me to," he said quickly. "You know, because you never go out with anyone, some of the girls in our class figured that you might like boys, and since they know I like you...I mean, if you don't, it's okay, but...Oh my god, did you just ask me if I wrote you a letter?"

"I like you," Hyukjae said, quickly running what Donghae had said through his mind a few times. Some of the girls thought he was gay? Wait - people knew Donghae was gay?

"I like you too," Donghae said quietly, staring at his feet. "A lot."

Hyukjae bit his lip and quickly wiped away a few tears. "Really?"

"Really." He nodded shallowly.

"Well, maybe we should, uh..." Hyukjae blinked a few times. "What should we do?"

"We could...kiss...or something."

"Well, uh..." Hyukjae almost slapped himself. What was he stalling for? "Okay."

Hyukjae half expected Donghae to cartwheel over to him or something, but he just walked over to him after a few awkward seconds of silence in which both of them were frantically wondering who was supposed to make the first move. Hyukjae thought his heart would crack his ribs as Donghae stood in front of him and tilted his head, waiting just one more second for Hyukjae to shriek and run away. He kissed him, lightly and shyly. Hyukjae thought he would die right there, his life complete. A boy he liked kissed him.

"Um, you...you write really cute letters," Hyukjae said quietly after a few seconds, breaking the silence.

"Thanks." Donghae smiled shyly at first, and then it turned into a grin. Hyukjae couldn't help but smile back. "Did you use the certificate?"

"No," Hyukjae answered, really regretting that he hadn't now.

"We could go after school," he said pointedly.

What a fantastic idea.

"Absolutely," Hyukjae replied, feeling suddenly giddy. "A date?"

"Something like that." Donghae laughed, grabbed both of his hands, kissed him, and then positively skipped to the door. He looked back as he opened it. "Meet me outside school later!"

Hyukjae waited until he was sure that Donghae was gone, and then let out a silent scream of glee.

HaeHyuk One-shot: He Snores, But He's Yours

aidenrose — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 19:41:36 GMT

Title: He Snores, But He's Yours
Length: One-shot / 1122
Genre: Fluff, Romance
Pairing: Donghae / Eunhyuk
Rating: PG-13
Synopsis: Eunhyuk has to deal with Donghae's snoring.

HOLA FROM BRAZIL!

LOL. :'D I am so sorry about this title...it sounds like crack, doesn't it? It's serious! I might have written this while I was being kept awake by a snoring person. I thought..."How would Eunhae deal? = =", and that might be how this was born. I DO NOT THINK THAT DONGHAE REALLY SNORES, AHAHAH~! He doesn't look like the snoring type. ~~but who knows?~~ I also do not endorse sleeping with a snoring person. Sleep separately for the sake of your health if it bothers you!

Also, yay for my first true 2nd-person piece of fiction!

One final note...I may not answer comments unless you have a question while I am in Brazil, because the internet is slow (takes a LONG time to load a comment reply for some reason =\) So...Since I'm only here for a while, I would rather spend the time in the jungle ^^; ...But I really, really appreciate each and every comment you guys leave me. They really encourage me!!! ^^ <3
CHYEEEAAAHHHHHH THE INTERNET BEHAVED and so I answered! XD

A more final final note...I am blogging about Brazil on my personal journal, if any of you are interested and haven't seen it yet. =o It's not friend-locked.

Please read and enjoy! ^ ^ /

(You = Eunhyuk, he/him = Donghae)

He Snores, But He's Yours

You're lying awake on your side, watching him resentfully as he sleeps with his mouth open and wondering how he doesn't wake himself up with how loudly he's snoring. Like a foghorn, a regular disturbance that you find impossible to ignore. Every time you get close to falling asleep, he'll take a catching, rattling breath and then snore especially loudly. When did he get like this?

You wonder how the other members can't hear it all through the dorm. You almost hope that one of them wakes up and comes to your rescue.

But that won't happen. It's up to you to bear the noise alone. You've finally given up sleeping, and you're wiling away the time watching his chest rise and fall, and wondering exactly how he is producing such an obnoxious sound.

And he's so oblivious. Oblivious of the suffering he's causing you, oblivious of the sleep he's depriving you of. He's threatening to leave you with huge bags under your eyes in the morning, and he's sleeping so soundly doing it. So soundly, in fact, that you can't bear to wake him up. At least one of you is getting a restful night's sleep, right?

Still, you miss the days when he didn't do this. When you slept holding him close, instead of on "your side" of the bed, when he slept wrapped around you, instead of lying on his back snoring. You miss the days when love was too young to set aside, when there was no "cuddle time" and "sleep time."

You look at him, and think of how old he's gotten - sure, twenty-three is pretty young - but it's been a long time since you've met him and fallen in love.

Love. You sigh. Really the only thing keeping you from pushing him off of the bed carelessly and kicking him out of your room. He's more than just faults, after all, and that's why you love him. You think of all the shared smiles, whispers, talks, and looks with him, all the sweet nothings and I love yous, all the briefest touches shared between you as well as the deeper and sweeter moments. All of the hours spent in his arms, just existing, loving him and knowing that you're loved by him, too. All of the highs reached with him, the pinnacles of your intimacy and affection. All of the successes of Super Junior celebrated with him, when everything in your world is perfect and the only thing for you to feel is bliss.

All of the beginnings, the works in progress, and the ends. The ends have all been welcome, haven't they? The end to shyness, awkward stages, figuring out how to have a healthy relationship, how to love one another and protect one another. The end to a few unspeakably awful hairstyles, you think and laugh silently.

And you think of all the times that he's been your friend before your lover. He's always been there to listen to you deeply, to relate to you and understand you. Even the few times when he couldn't understand, he tried his best to. He's always been there to support you and cheer you on, and he's taken your whining and complaining with a grain of salt and an amused smile.

Isn't that what a lover is for? To understand you and know you completely and still want to sleep next to you when he gets the chance. To love you completely, even though you yourself have innumerable faults. And isn't that what your job as his lover is? To accept him and love him even when his body is driving you crazy with its incessant snoring?

You almost laugh, and even though you've thought all of that, the next time he snores with a sudden extreme loudness, you roll onto him and wake him up by kissing his bottom lip and then biting it gently.

"Wha?" he moans quietly, waking up and stretching. "S'time?"

"You're snoring," you say, cringing a little at the harshness of your voice.

"Sorry," he says, surprised, and halts in mid-stretch.

"Not sorry enough," you say, letting a laugh creep into your voice this time, and you jab him hard between the ribs. The last of your resentment melts away as he yelps quietly in pain and then laughs. You still love him enough that you don't want to hurt him.

"I'm sorry," he says earnestly. He sighs and puts his hands around your waist, that familiar and still welcome touch. "Do you want me to go back to my room?"

"No, stay," you say quickly, almost surprising yourself. You lower your head onto his shoulder and then kiss his throat, the same throat that has kept you up for hours. But it's also the throat that he sustains his life with: he eats, drinks, and breathes through it, and you're grateful for all of it. You don't know what you would do without him, and so really, you're lucky that he's around to snore and remind you that he's alive with it. And you can't help but smile at the beauty of your hearts beating in sync next to each other.

"I love you," you sigh and nuzzle your face against his neck.

"I love you too," he says and rolls onto his side, forcing you onto yours. He slips his fingers beneath your waistband and keeps them over your hip, just because he can and he's the only one whom you allow to touch you there like that. You caress the side of his face, and you can just see him looking at you until you put your thumb lightly over his eyelid. He's so trusting. You leave his face and weave your fingers through his silky hair, and then finally let your hand rest against his neck.

"Fall asleep," he whispers, adjusting his position and then cradling you against him. "That way I won't bother you."

"Fine," you whisper back, accepting his compromise. You know you'll be able to do it. You can fall asleep first like this, with his quietly reassuring touch and concern for you. "Thank you."

"I'm sorry," he says again.

"Eh," you say, snuggling into him and sighing. He may snore, but it's not like he means to. It isn't his fault at all. And he's lovely, and handsome, and kind, and he loves you enough to wait for you to fall asleep to try to fall back asleep himself. He has a whole score of other virtues. He's everything and more that you could want. And he loves you. "I've decided that it's okay."

"Alright," he laughs. "Have sweet dreams."

"You too..." you breathe, your eyelids already growing heavy in the beautiful silence.

HaeHyuk One-shot: Assigned Seating

aidenrose — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 19:13:20 GMT

Title: Assigned Seating
Length: One-shot / 835
Genre: Fluff
Pairings: Donghae / Eunhyuk
Rating: G
Synopsis: Assigned seating on an airplane has separated Donghae and Eunhyuk, to Eunhyuk's disappointment.

I wrote this on my mom's laptop during my plane ride to Brazil...and only recently got it off of there and on onto my computer. Here it is, finally! :D Please read and enjoy! ^ ^ /

Assigned Seating

Eunhyuk walked down the airplane aisle, looking between his boarding pass, the plaques above the seating rows, and back at Donghae, trying to remember where he was sitting, and if he had even asked him.

Why, he wondered, grimacing a little bit, hadn't he at least walked on with him?

He found his seat, threw one last glance at him, and sat down. He shoved his bag beneath the seat in front of him and then watched in disappointment as Donghae sat down a row ahead of him, on the opposite side of the plane. The chances of them sitting together with assigned seating in an like airplane like this were slim, he knew. He sighed, and was tempted to lean across and hit him and suggest that they sit together, but Eeteuk slipped in next to him and wondered aloud about the complimentary services and the time it would take them to get to their destination. As if the service would be any different, or the time was a mystery, Eunhyuk thought, narrowing his eyes at him, annoyed.

Eeteuk pursed his lips at Eunhyuk's expression, and Eunhyuk looked out of the window resignedly, ignoring Eeteuk's lilting interrogations about his mood.

It wasn't Eeteuk's fault. He was just a poor substitute for who Eunhyuk had really wanted to spend three hours with.

Eeteuk quieted down eventually and pulled his hat down over his tired eyes - which, as with most of the members' eyes, had heavy purple bags beneath them - and hugged his travel pillow.

Since he wasn't sitting next to Donghae, the best way to speed up time was to sleep. But he couldn't sleep, because he could see Donghae from where he was sitting, and every so often, Donghae would glance back at him.

It wasn't Donghae's fault either.

It was just assigned seating, and there was nothing they could do short of kicking Eeteuk out of his seat and making him trade with Donghae. Eunhyuk looked at Eeteuk's sleeping form and sighed. It's only three hours, he thought. It's not really worth it.

By now, Eunhyuk had gotten used to flying, and he no longer found it to be stressful. He barely even noticed as the plane departed and ascended into the sky. He didn't even notice when it leveled off again at high altitude and the flight attendant gave them permission to use electronic devices again. He didn't even register it when Eeteuk woke up and stretched. He didn't notice any of it, because he was preoccupied by looking at Donghae and wishing that he had arranged to sit next to him before they boarded.

"You want to sit next to him, don't you?"

Eunhyuk blinked and looked at Eeteuk, who was smiling at him out of the corner of his eye.

"No," Eunhyuk lied, blushing a little bit. "It's okay."

"Were you staring at him the entire time?"

He just looked at Eeteuk, giving away the answer.

"I'll ask him to switch with me."

"It's okay," he said again shyly. "It's no big deal."

"I want to sit next to Kangin anyway."

"Eh? Why?"

"Donghae's sitting next to him. I'm jealous."

"You're not seriously jealous..."

"Aren't you jealous, too?" Eeteuk reached down and retrieved his bag. "Why don't we just make this simple?"

Eeteuk stood up and winked at him as he made his way towards Donghae and tapped him on the shoulder. Eunhyuk blushed as Donghae glanced up, removed his headphones, and asked him what he wanted. Donghae glanced at Eunhyuk, and then stood up and gave his seat to Eeteuk. Eeteuk threw Eunhyuk a smile as he sat down and went right back to his sleeping position without saying more than two words to Kangin.

Donghae sat down and slung his headphones around his neck. He leaned across the armrest and spoke in a low voice next to Eunhyuk's ear.

"Did you know that Eeteuk really wanted to sit next to Kangin?"

"Really?" Eunhyuk asked innocently, feigning curiosity. He glanced at Eeteuk again, and he wasn't acting as if he was very happy to be sitting next to him. He was just sleeping.

"Yeah." Donghae smiled. "But he's been sleeping the whole time."

"Poor Eeteuk."

Donghae nodded and settled into his new seat. He looked at Eunhyuk for a few seconds, and then Eunhyuk watched as it dawned on him.

"Oh," he said softly. "You wanted to sit next to me."

"No, that's..." he trailed off as Donghae raised an eyebrow. "Yes."

Donghae smiled and put his headphones back on. He reached over and held Eunhyuk's hand so casually that anyone passing by probably wouldn't have even noticed. It just seemed so natural.

"Okay like this?" Donghae murmured, closing his eyes.

"Yes." Eunhyuk leaned his head back, and rather than go to sleep, counted the minutes and seconds, absolutely content to be doing nothing more than taking advantage of the small amount of time, the small intimacy, that a simple plane ride and an astute friend provided them with.

Eunhae One-shot: White Christmas

aidenrose — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 19:08:57 GMT

Title: White Christmas
Length: One-shot / 2,010
Genre: Fluff
Pairing: Eunhyuk / Donghae
Rating: PG
Synopsis: After Eunhyuk laughed at Donghae for decorating a Christmas tree by himself, Donghae guilted Eunhyuk into promising to decorate the entire dorm in secret early Christmas morning.

Merry Christmas, everyone!!! :D I hope you are all enjoying the holiday with your families and friends...I hope that if you're in a place where it can snow, that it snowed. Can you believe that it's already Christmas again? ^^; This fic was inspired by something that I heard EunTeuk talked about on SuKiRa - that Donghae decorated a tree all by himself and Eunhyuk called him weird? Hehe. Please read and enjoy! ^ ^ / Merry Christmas!

White Christmas

Eunhyuk lay on his bed, counting snowflakes. If it weren't for the wind blowing them against his window, he might not have known that it was snowing. From where he lay, he couldn't see the slow swirl past the street lamps. Every time he reached thirteen, he started counting from zero again. It was four hours into Christmas, and with the way things were going, on Christmas 'morning', it would be white.

He sighed. Not that they would have much time to appreciate it. But it would be nice. It would be beautiful, and for however much free time they had, it would feel like Christmas.

He looked at the time on his cellphone. It was already 4:19. Where is he? He closed the phone with a snap and sat up. Immediately he shivered and pulled his sleeves down over his palms. Eunhyuk decided that if Donghae didn't show up in the next twenty minutes, he would declare him asleep, and abandon their idea and go to sleep himself. But as it was, he still had some faith left in him. He pulled his hood up and quietly left his room.

Everyone else was sleeping. As they ought to be, Eunhyuk thought. As he should be, too.

But no. He had been cajoled by a hurt Donghae into staying up and secretly decorating the dorm with him. It wasn't even his dorm, Eunhyuk though exasperatedly. But apparently Donghae's floor just didn't care enough to decorate, and wouldn't appreciate it if Donghae did it by himself. Here where Eunhyuk lived, however, were people such as Sungmin and Ryeowook. People who loved sparkly things.

He stretched as he walked towards the couch and fell onto it. He curled up into a ball and stared at the door, willing it to open. After minutes of blinking at it with increasing sleepiness and wondering why the living room was so much colder than his bedroom, he heard the key turn in the lock and sat up quickly, rubbing his eyes and yawning.

Donghae came in with a box and set it down quickly, flashing a grin at Eunhyuk. He wondered where Donghae got that kind of enthusiasm at this hour. He closed the door quietly and almost skipped over to Eunhyuk.

"Merry Christmas," he whispered an instant before kissing him lightly.

"Merry Christmas," Eunhyuk replied, slipping his icy cold fingers beneath Donghae's shirt. Donghae jumped back and laughed silently.

"What was that for?" He shivered and rubbed his stomach where Eunhyuk had touched him. "And why are you an icicle?"

"Because you're late." Eunhyuk stood up and locked the door. How could Donghae be that forgetful, really?

"I'm sorry," Donghae said, wrapping his arms around Eunhyuk's slender waist. "I fell asleep."

"I knew you would," Eunhyuk laughed, turning around and putting his hands inside Donghae's hood. "How come you woke up?"

"Because the spirit of Christmas came down and woke me up," Donghae said, smiling at him. "All so I could be with you."

"That's cute. But you still fell asleep."

"It is like four in the morning." Donghae leaned in and kissed him again.

"So? I didn't fall asleep."

"You have more discipline. That or you're used to staying up this late."

"Well, not this late."

"Really?"

"I didn't make hot chocolate," Eunhyuk said, switching the subject away from his sleeping habits.

"That's okay." Donghae let go of him and carried the box into the living room. "We can make some later."

"It's snowing," Eunhyuk said, taking Donghae's hand once he had put it down and pulling him to the windows. "Come see."

"Woah." Donghae cupped his hands around his eyes and stared out. "How pretty."

"Think it'll be a problem getting around later?" Eunhyuk wondered, leaning against the glass and watching Donghae's face instead of the snow.

"Nah. They'll clear the roads."

"Don't you kind of want to get snowed in on Christmas?"

"Yes." Donghae laughed. "We'd stay in all day and bake cookies."

"Pfft."

"Or at least eat cookies."

"Sure."

"I'm dreaming of a white Christmas..." Donghae sang softly. They shared a smile for a few seconds, and then Donghae turned and opened the box.

Eunhyuk plugged in the Christmas tree. A week ago he had caught Donghae setting it up, and at the time, had shamelessly made fun of him for decorating it all by himself. It was the last time Eunhyuk would ever do that, because Donghae used the opportunity to guilt Eunhyuk into decorating with him. It was his fault for falling for such a manipulative and undeniably adorable person. But at least it gave Eunhyuk plenty of opportunities to play hard to get.

"You know," Donghae was saying as he pulled out a long reel of lights, "I was ten when I stopped believing in Santa Claus."

"What?" Eunhyuk laughed and began helping him take things out of the box. "So old."

"It's not that old!"

"That's pretty old, Donghae." He patted his shoulder. "But that's kind of cute, too. Your parents must have had a good time."

"Yeah, but I think they were happy when I figured it out...Because they used to get up at this hour to put Santa's presents under the tree."

"Ten years of doing this...I think I'd die."

"What if he we had kids?"

"Donghae!" Eunhyuk laughed. "We can't have kids."

"Would you get up to leave them presents and make them happy?"

"Yes," Eunhyuk sighed. "I see your point."

"Mhmm." Donghae nodded. "Okay...where should we put this stuff?"

He stood with his hands on his hips and looked around the room while Eunhyuk looked at the things Donghae had brought: decorations of every type, all of them looking like they came out of a Christmas storybook.

"When did you get this stuff?"

"Last week." Donghae laughed. "I just felt really festive and wanted to get a lot of things."

"They're nice," Eunhyuk said quietly.

"Do you think so?" Donghae grinned and wrapped a string of tinsel around Eunhyuk's neck. Eunhyuk took it off, hiding his smile, and wrapped it around the tree.

"Maybe you should put the lights around the windows," Eunhyuk suggested, resigning himself to his slowly growing enthusiasm. After all, it was kind of nice to be doing something with Donghae with just the two of them. Something relatively normal and commonplace.

Sneaking through the dorm, they put up all of the decorations, quietly laughing and talking when they felt like it. It only took them an hour, and once they got into it, it didn't feel like time had passed at all. They decorated as thoroughly as they were able to, and when they were done, they turned off the lights and let the tree and their decorations light the room. The effect was pleasantly dark and warm.

After arguing about whether to use milk or water to make hot chocolate, they decided on milk, and Eunhyuk left Donghae to tweak decorations here and there while he made hot chocolate. He had to admit that it did feel very Christmasy. It was pretty, even though the lights looked fuzzy to his tired eyes.

He sat down on the couch and yawned. It was well past five in the morning by now. He rubbed his eyes, ignored how early he had to get up, and didn't think about whether or not he would get any sleep at all. Instead he just thought that it was worth losing sleep for, and that this would be a good memory. Next year they would probably laugh about it.

"Here." Donghae handed him a mug of hot chocolate and sat down next to him. "Looks nice."

"Mm." Eunhyuk nodded, smiling. He held the mug in both hands and savored the warmth. It felt like a novelty for Eunhyuk to have warm hands again.

"Thank you."

Eunhyuk looked at him, and Donghae smiled back. No matter how old he got, Donghae's smile never changed, Eunhyuk thought. He was always endearing.

"Let's take a photo," Eunhyuk suggested. He took out his cellphone, and Donghae carefully scooted closer to him until they were shoulder-to-shoulder. Eunhyuk held the phone out at arm's length and took their picture.

"Cute," Donghae commented, sipping the hot chocolate. "Take one of the room."

Eunhyuk nodded and took two photographs of the room. Then he quickly snapped a photo of him kissing Donghae's cheek before Donghae could protest. Donghae laughed and told him to delete it. Eunhyuk refused to, promising that he wouldn't lose the phone. Donghae argued that because he said he wouldn't, he would lose the phone. But eventually, when his drink was finished, he gave up and wrapped his arms around Eunhyuk's waist and asked to see it.

Eunhyuk showed him it, and he looked at it for a long time without saying anything. Eunhyuk almost thought that he might have fallen asleep. Moments before Eunhyuk was going to ask him something to see if he was still awake, Donghae spoke.

"We...look good together," he said softly.

Eunhyuk grinned and put his arm around Donghae's neck. "Because we are good together."

"You think so too?"

"Of course I think so."

Donghae laughed - no, giggled, as if it were news to him, and made him really happy.

"What did you get me for Christmas?" Eunhyuk turned towards Donghae, making it easier to cuddle. There was something he liked about cuddling with him in the low light and speaking in intimately low voices on Christmas.

"You can't know until Christmas morning," Donghae mumbled sleepily.

"It is Christmas morning."

"Then not until the sun comes up."

"You just like making me wait."

"What did you get me, then?"

"Nothing."

"Why? It's such a nice opportunity to give me a gift."

"I don't buy people things."

"So cheap..."

"You don't need things from me, do you?" Eunhyuk kissed his hair. "If you have me, that is."

"It'd still be nice to have something I can look at and think 'my boyfriend got me that for Christmas last year...'"

Eunhyuk sighed. "Fine. I'll get you something."

"But don't do it resentfully."

"I can't resent giving you a gift. Don't be silly."

"'Kay." Even though Eunhyuk couldn't see his face, he knew that Donghae was smiling.

"What do I tell everyone when they wake up?" Eunhyuk wondered aloud. "The truth? That you wanted to surprise everyone by decorating for them?"

"Tell them that Santa Claus came and decorated it."

Eunhyuk laughed. "I thought Santa Claus only delivers gifts."

Donghae smiled and shifted positions, putting his head on Eunhyuk's shoulder. "He can do anything he likes; he's magical."

"I'll tell them."

"I like Christmas."

"Everyone likes Christmas." Eunhyuk smiled. "And it comes every year."

"Mhmm." Donghae took a long, therapeutic deep breath. "Every year..."

Eunhyuk slowly ran his fingers through Donghae's hair, smiling at the soft feel of it through his fingers.

"Yah...if you're going to sleep, let's just go to my room."

"I should leave," he replied sleepily. "I really shouldn't stay here."

"Who cares?" Eunhyuk sighed and stood up. "It's Christmas. Come on."

He pulled Donghae to his feet and walked with him to his room, listening to Donghae's whispered justifications - because after all, they had a good excuse for Donghae being there - all the way to his bed, where he shut him up by kissing him. They snuggled together beneath the blankets and Eunhyuk poked Donghae and told him to look at the window. The snow was still falling at an angle, gently brushing the glass, and Eunhyuk was surprised by how pleased he felt to share the scene he had witnessed earlier with Donghae.

"Is it worth falling asleep?" Eunhyuk asked, touching Donghae's closed eyelid gently. "It's not even late anymore - it's early."

"I can't stay awake."

"Mmmm...But the snow is lovely, isn't it?"

"I'll dream about it," Donghae murmured and nuzzled his face into Eunhyuk's shoulder like a cat. "You too."

"I'll try." Eunhyuk yawned and closed his eyes.

"Ah. Just one question, though."

"Mm?"

"What are we doing for New Years?"

Eunhae One-shot: Strawberry Cake

aidenrose — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 19:04:36 GMT

Title: Strawberry Cake
Length: 575
Genre: Fluff
Pairing: Eunhyuk/Donghae
Rating: G
Synopsis: Donghae hides a cake for Hyukjae thinking that he won't know it's from him, but when Hyukjae figures it out, what will happen?

So, yesterday was my birthday! ^o^ Sweet Se7enteen, I am. I thought about writing a short crack fic for it, but I wasn't feeling it, so I wrote this instead. It's three hours past my birthday because I was too busy celebrating to write this any sooner. ^^ Good times. Anyway, please read and enjoy! ^ ^ / (Now that I no longer have a Saturday fic deadline to meet, you know what this means? Guilt-free one-shots! WOO! *w*)

Strawberry Cake

Donghae put the final candle into the cake, perfectly symmetrical with the rest of them, careful not to disrupt the spiral pattern of glazed strawberries atop the supposedly delicious cake beneath. He carried it into Hyukjae's room and placed it carefully on his bed. After he was pleased with its position, he smiled, nodded once, and went back to his room to go to sleep.

He had left no note, no card, nothing that would lead back to him. Together with everyone else earlier in the day, he'd given a gift to Hyukjae and celebrated his birthday. He had even called him to congratulate him - but this was something that he gave anonymously - a mysterious cake that had been summoned out of the rift as far as Hyukjae would know.

He smiled, pleased with his own cleverness, and closed his eyes, snuggled into his pillow with his blanket snugly tucked in around him. There was no way that Hyukjae could possibly know that it was from him. No way whatsoever.

"Hey, wake up."

"Five more minutes," he moaned, rolling over. "I'll get dressed fast."

"Stupid," the voice laughed. "It's like four in the morning."

Donghae blinked a few times and slowly emerged from his somniferous daze. He looked over his shoulder and saw Hyukjae standing there, holding up the cake he'd left him and wearing an amused expression.

"This from you?" he said, his lips curling into a smile. Donghae sunk down lower beneath his blanket and narrowed his eyes.

"Maybe," he said, knowing his tone really meant yes.

Hyukjae laughed. "You left me a cake?"

"Maybe." He coughed and sat up. "How did you know?"

"Gut feeling. Why didn't you just say so?"

"Because..." Donghae shrugged. "Isn't it kind of embarrassing?"

"I'm not embarrassed. You wanted to celebrate with me more? That's cute."

"It's cute?" Donghae smiled.

"Yeah. Do you have matches?"

"But," Donghae said, starting to laugh. "It's not your birthday anymore."

"Eh, close enough. Do you have matches?"

"Yeah." Hyukjae set the cake down and disappeared, saying he was going to get plates and forks. Donghae found a box of matches and sat down again, laughing at himself in his head. Hyukjae returned and closed the door behind him.

"I like strawberries," he said, sitting down slowly on his bed to not upset the cake.

"I know you do," Donghae said and blushed. He quickly looked down and lit a match. Hyukjae reached back and turned off the light as Donghae lit the candles. When all twenty-two were lit, and he'd gone through three matches, he smiled at Hyukjae.

"Happy birthday."

"Aren't you going to sing it?"

Donghae blushed. "Must I?"

"You have to."

"But I already did."

"I don't care, I want to hear you sing it. Just you."

Donghae cleared his throat. "Fine." He sang the happy birthday song to him quietly, meeting his eyes every few seconds, but mostly looking at the candles because he was feeling self conscious, and Hyukjae blew out the candles when he was done. They turned on the lights again, and cut slices of the cake out.

"By the way, I like you. You know that, right?"

"No." Donghae blushed. "I like you too."

Hyukjae held out a forkful of cake to Donghae. After a second, what Hyukjae was doing dawned on him and he opened his mouth, blushing furiously. Hyukjae slipped the fork into Donghae's mouth and smiled.

"Happy Un-birthday, Donghae."

Eunhae One-shot: Fish for the Fishy

aidenrose — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 18:14:00 GMT

Title: Fish for the Fishy
Length: One-shot / 660
Genre: Fluff
Pairing: Eunhyuk / Donghae
Rating: G
Synopsis: Eunhyuk is taking Donghae on a secret trip - blindfolded!

I had to decide between Fish for the Fishy, Fishy for the Fish, and Fish for the Fish. D:

Fish for the Fishy

"Where are we?" Donghae asked, laughing and holding onto the car door as he balanced himself. He was blindfolded. He shut the door just as Eunhyuk walked around the car and took his hand.

"You'll see." He led him assertively for some distance, occasionally dropping misleading hints about their whereabouts. Donghae could tell that it was a crowded place by the amount of noise; people talking and footsteps all around. He couldn't tell if they were underground or aboveground, inside or outside, though. He tightened his hold on Eunhyuk's hand, and Eunhyuk squeezed his in response.

"Are we almost there?" he asked as Eunhyuk guided him up a step.

"Almost."

"How close?"

"Close."

"Where are we?" Donghae laughed. Eunhyuk laughed too and slowly came to a halt.

"If I leave you here, will you promise not to peek or move?"

"How long will you be gone?"

A short pause. "Three minutes."

"Okay, I promise."

"Here, hold onto this post so you don't lose your balance and fall over." Because you really might, he thought.

"Okay, okay. Three minutes."

Eunhyuk left, and Donghae lazily wrapped an arm around the post. He really wanted to peek and see where he was, but he promised he wouldn't - and a promise he made to Eunhyuk was one that he kept, no matter what. It was a torturous three minutes for him, battling his curiosity with his devotion to Eunhyuk. When it seemed like he couldn't bear to wait any longer, Eunhyuk reappeared, teasingly asking if he'd peeked.

They held hands again and walked a short distance. He could tell by the way that Eunhyuk's body moved and the soft whoosh of air that he opened a door - and his suspicions were confirmed when he detected the subtle change in quality of air and sound. They were inside.

"Seriously, where are we?"

"Wait just a little longer."

Thirty seconds later, they stopped and Eunhyuk slowly untied his blindfold as Donghae bubbled with excitement. The blindfold fell away, and Donghae blinked a few times. It didn't take long for his eyes to adjust, because they were in a dark place, and after a few seconds he gasped. Before him was a huge glass window to an aquarium where fish from South America, colorful and vibrant, darted to and fro in their environment. It was breathtakingly beautiful.

"Wow," was all he could say. "Wow."

Eunhyuk laughed. "I brought you to the aquarium."

"No kidding..." he tore his eyes away from the fish to look at him. "This is great!"

Eunhyuk smiled. "I'm happy that you like it."

"I can't believe how beautiful they are," he said wonderingly, taking an extra step closer to the glass. "I wish I could swim with them."

"See what they look like from their own viewpoint? Yeah. Me too."

"I guess this is as good as it gets, huh..."

"Short of diving, I think so."

"We're lucky," Donghae said softly. "Really lucky that we can see this."

"Mm." Eunhyuk nodded, touching the glass with his fingertips.

They watched the fish for several minutes, taking in each individual beautiful intricacy available to their eyes. Then Donghae turned to Eunhyuk and hugged him. "Thank you for taking me here," he said.

"There's a lot more to see...including clown fish," Eunhyuk said, hugging him in return. "And you're welcome. I've actually wanted to bring you here for a long time."

"Thank you," he said again. Eunhyuk smiled and linked his fingers with Donghae's. "C'mon. Let's go explore."

"Okay." Donghae smiled. "How big is the aquarium?"

"It's really large. It'll take us a few hours to get through."

"Seriously?"

"Probably." They smiled at each other a few seconds. A few hours to get through it with you. They turned and walked, side-by-side, through the rest of the aquarium, meeting each new tank and display with as much enthusiasm as the last. At some point, Donghae laughed secretly: fish for your fishy, is it?

Eunhae One-shot: Count Hyukula

aidenrose — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 18:07:26 GMT

Title: Count Hyukula
Length: One-shot / 1250
Genre: Fluff, romance, comedy
Pairing: Eunhyuk / Donghae
Rating: PG
Synopsis: Eunhyuk tries to pull a Halloween prank on Donghae...as Count Hyukula!

Dedicated to my friend xoxo_nat_xx for her birthday! Thank you for requesting this prompt - I had fun with it! I hope that you like it!! ^^ HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
(This also counts as my Halloween fic! ^w^)

Count Hyukula

Donghae woke up to the weight of someone - and he had a pretty good guess about who it was - sitting on his stomach, their knees planted on either side of him. He wanted to ignore it, but ignoring it wouldn't make it go away. What did he want? He was just sitting there, motionless, and it made Donghae shiver to think that he was just watching him.

He opened his eyes just a crack, and for a moment, he couldn't believe what he saw. So he opened his eyes fully and then burst out laughing. Eunhyuk was sitting on him, wearing an oversized costume cloak, complete with a huge collar, and he was smiling at him like an overstuffed vulture with two fake fangs poking out over his bottom lip like snaggle teeth.

"I am Count Hyukula!" Eunhyuk chortled in an embarrassingly bad accent which he must have thought was Draculaesuqe. "I have come to drink your blood!"

Donghae laughed and bit his bottom lip, and then reached up and smacked him on the forehead when he leaned down with his mouth open as if about to bite him.

"That is weird," Donghae said. "Don't even try it."

"What's weird? It's not that different from kissing," Eunhyuk whined, his accent slipping as he tried to get around Donghae's hand. "It's funny!"

"It's not funny," Donghae hissed. "And don't say that here!"

"No one can hear...Don't hit me." He gave up and crossed his arms, pouting down at him.

"I've never really hit you," Donghae said, rolling his eyes. "Don't say it in that tone."

"I know..." Eunhyuk frowned. "Why are you in such a bad mood?"

"I'm not," Donghae said. He touched his neck and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes, zoning out a little bit as his dream came back to him. "Sorry."

"I'm just trying to bite you."

"Did you bite me in my sleep?"

"Huh? No."

"Really?"

"I really didn't." Eunhyuk laughed. "Why?"

"I had a dream that yo-" Donghae broke off and blushed. "No, never mind. I woke up when you got on top of me."

"Had a dream that I what?" Eunhyuk smirked. He tried to adjust the fangs so that he could speak more easily, but gave up and took them out. "I wouldn't bite you in your sleep...you'd wake up and freak out for sure."

"Yeah," Donghae said. "That would be weirder."

"Blood tastes good." Eunhuk smiled and put his fangs in again, amplifying the creepy effect of his comment. Smiling like a vampire would, Donghae thought.

"How do you know that?" Donghae raised an eyebrow and cringed at the same time.

"Everyone knows blood is tasty." Eunhyuk blinked. "And haven't you licked a cut or something before?"

"Yeah, but I haven't ever thought that it tasted good." Donghae grabbed another pillow and put it beneath his head. "What time is it?"

"Nine or so." Eunhyuk shrugged. "Lemme bite you. Just so you have a good story to tell."

"Tell to who? And you really want me to tell people that you snuck into my room and tried to bite me with vampire fangs on Halloween? That makes you look weird."

"I don't really care. And it's cute...."

"Hyukjae." Donghae sat up on his hands. "Why do you want to bite me so badly?"

"I don't know." Eunhyuk laughed. "I thought it would be kind of fun."

"I think it's weird."

"Why?" Eunhyuk crossed his arms around Donghae's neck. "It's not like I really want to be a vampire."

"I had a dream that you were a vampire."

Eunhyuk burst out laughing. "Really?"

"Yeah. Just now."

"Was it sexy?"

"It was disturbing," Donghae said. "You were drinking my blood! I was gonna die."

"Not die," Eunhyuk corrected. "You'd become a vampire, too!"

"How lovely."

Eunhyuk laughed again. "Was it like this?"

He tilted his head and opened his mouth as if going to bite him, and Donghae pushed him away and laid down again, holding him away at arm's length.

"Don't," Donghae pleaded. "Please."

"I'm just playing with you," Eunhyuk said softly, frowning a little bit. "Was it a nightmare?"

"Sort of. Just don't!"

Eunhyuk sighed and took the fangs out and put them down on Donghae's night stand. He lowered Donghae's hands gently until he was no longer blocking his way, and leaned down, asking him to trust him with his eyes.

"Just this, then," he whispered. He tilted his head and kissed Donghae's neck gently, just where he might have bitten him.

"So human," Donghae said, covering how touched he was. "See, this is fine."

Eunhyuk laughed softly and slowly kissed his way to the other side of his neck.

"But maybe..." He laughed again and then bit his neck so lightly that he wouldn't even leave a temporary mark. It was just enough pressure so that Donghae could feel it, but it was gentle and didn't draw attention to itself. It lasted for a second, and then Eunhyuk moved off of him and laid down next to him on his side, propping his head up on his elbow.

"So bad?"

Donghae turned towards him and frowned, even though he was blushing. He was going to tell him yes, but couldn't, because as soon as he saw Eunhyuk laughing, he had to laugh himself.

"You bit me!"

"Yes," Eunhyuk purred. "And now you're mine for all eternity."

"You're not a vampire."

"But if I were a vampire, I would want you to be on too." He moved closer and Donghae made room for him on the pillow. "I want to be together forever."

"That's so cheesy," Donghae said, laughing lightly. Eunhyuk smiled without a hint of embarrassment and pulled out a small box from his pocket.

"Here," he said, handing it to Donghae.

"What is it?"

"I'm proposing," Eunhyuk said and then laughed, covering his face with his hand.

Donghae looked at him for a second, and when Eunhyuk's smile didn't change, he opened the box. Inside were candies, some in orange wrappers with jack-o-lanters and bats on them.

"You said you were proposing!" Donghae laughed and took out a candy.

"Will you marry me?"

"Yeah," Donghae said. "Of course."

"Good, good." He kissed Donghae's hand and then took a piece of Halloween candy out. "I'd hoped you'd say yes."

"How could I say no?" Donghae bit into a piece of candy. "You want to be with me forever. I'd be an idiot to refuse that kind of adoration."

"Don't you love me too?" Eunhyuk bit his lip. "Maybe you don't because I bit you."

"I love you." Donghae stroked his collarbone once and then took another piece of candy. "Even when you bite me."

"So you liked it?"

Donghae blushed and shrugged.

"I see." Eunhyuk smirked. "So what shall we do today? Go to the company party?"

"Are you going as 'Count Hyukula'?"

"Of course! You should come as a vampire too."

"I don't know..." Donghae mused. "Maybe. But anyway - that's later."

"Are you trying to say now is us time, and you don't want to talk about it?"

"Look who knows me so well. Also, I usually have to come to you..." Donghae mused, closing his eyes as Eunhyuk kissed his cheek. "It's nice."

"It's a holiday," he said. "Although, it's kind of a strange holiday to propose on, I guess."

"Halloween..." Donghae raised an eyebrow. "That is kind of weird."

"At least you accepted my proposal..."

"Right." Donghae smiled. "Happy Halloween."

Polychromatic Us: Chapter Five

aidenrose — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 17:45:36 GMT

Title: Polychromatic Us
Part: Chapter Five: Orange
Previous Parts: Chapter One, Chapter Two, Chapter Three, Chapter Four
Genre: Romance
Pairing: Donghae / Eunhyuk
Rating: PG-13 (sensuality)
Word Count: 4,368
Synopsis: Colors have always been there in our relationship...from the day I met you. If I were to tell our story, I’d do it with a canvas and paint; vibrant colors of every shade and hue.
Next Update: No specific date. Busy busy busy in January! ^^

In January I'm going to be out of town a lot...so chapter six will be up as soon as possible, but I don't want to promise a specific date because I will probably miss it. Sorry about that. ^^ I hope everyone had really great holidays! And Happy New Year~! Please read and enjoy! ^ ^ /

Thanks again to tvxqsocks for helping me to edit and generally being awesome. <3

Orange

I rest my chin on my knees and hit play on my iPod. A song I know by heart so well that in all practical senses, it is a part of me, plays. I turn up the volume and smile. It's one of our songs, now put behind us to make way for new singles until the time is right to perform it once again. The reason I can smile so happily while listening to it now is because no one is parting ways from the group. We're staying as we were created forever.

Well, okay, not exactly forever. But it feels like forever to me right now.

Instead of losing my friends, we're gaining a new member. I don't know much about him. He only signed to SM Entertainment recently, and I've met him, but the first thing that comes to mind is still the fact that he's younger than us. Which means we have someone new to tease. I laugh. Put more nicely, it means that we have someone new to get to know. I don't know how I really feel about someone coming into the group after we've already debuted and bonded, but I'm not upset about it. I'm much too happy for that.

A few hours ago, we were at dinner with the CEO. Now it's almost one in the morning, and I'm sitting on the floor in the living room next to the windows. Everyone else is sleeping already, or doing things by themselves. We're all used to each other.

I smile at my faint reflection and the city beyond it. My dream came true, and I'm living it. I can't ask for anything else. I'm doing exactly what I wanted to do everyday, and I have some kind of future ahead of me with these people. I wouldn't want to work with anyone else.

But if I thought that being a trainee was hard, it pales to nothingness in comparison with being a working idol. It's a good kind of exhaustion, but it's still exhaustion. Not only that, but the brief gap between high school and college is gone. I am busier than ever.

But it isn't having consequences - at least not yet - on the other major thing in my life. Even on days when we have different schedules, and I don't see you until late if at all, I'll think about you and text you. Somehow we maintain some kind of link. And just with that, we're okay, if not closer than ever. When you have to try harder to make a relationship work, the more you realize that it's important, and the stronger it is, I guess.

Maybe I'm reading too much into it. But you are important.

"Here." A hand and a carton of strawberry milk are lowered in front of my eyes. I look back and smile at Sungmin as I take it. He sits down next to me and leans back on his hands.

"So you're still stuck with me."

"Stuck with you?" I laugh and punch a hole in the carton with the straw.

"Are you happy, then?" He smiles at me and pulls out one of my earbuds. He scoots closer to me and puts it into his own ear. "Oh, this song."

"How could I be anything but happy? Strawberry milk is the best."

"I meant because no one is leaving," he laughs.

"I'm thrilled. Aren't you?"

"Of course." He grins. "This is exactly what I wanted to have happen."

"Me too."

"What about Kyuhyun, though?" He tilts his head and almost pouts. I still don't know how he's managed to only get cuter after debut. But then again, when you condition yourself to be like that on camera, it has to carry over to your normal personality to some degree. No one should know more about conditioning behavior than myself.

"Who?"

"Cho Kyuhyun. The new guy."

"Oh." I shrug. "I don't have much of an opinion."

"I kind of like him. I guess we'd better like him, since he's going to become one of us."

I shrug. "So what, did you guys talk, or something?"

"A little."

"Oh." I smirk. "I see."

"What?" He pouts. "It was just a little."

"He's already your friend?"

"Well, he's got to have one, hasn't he?" he says defensively.

"Do you feel sorry for him?"

"No, that's not why..."

"So what do you like about him?"

"I just do, okay?"

"Whatever." I sigh switch the song to something else. "Don't forget about me when you fall in love with him."

"Huh?"

I laugh. "I'm just joking."

"That isn't funny."

My smile fades. "I'm sorry. I thought it was pretty funny."

There's a pause, and he stares moodily out of the window. "Like how you forgot about me when you fell in love with Donghae?"

"Sungmin." I roll my eyes. "How many times have I told you that it's not like that? And how many times have I told you that you're just imagining us drifting apart?"

"We spent a lot more time together before you became friends with him."

"We spent a lot more time together before we got really busy with training and preparing for our debut and everything after that. It's not because of him."

"Fine," he sighs. "Sorry, I shouldn't bring it up again."

"It's okay. But make this the last time already."

"Okay."

"Anyway, pick a song," I say, handing him the iPod. "It's not fair if I pick all of them."

"I'll pick something you hate."

"There's nothing I hate on my iPod, stupid."

Sungmin giggles and scrolls through my song library.

"Are you sleeping soon?" he asks.

"Maybe."

"You want to keep your room, right?"

"Uh, yes. Why?"

"Okay." He smiles. "Then I'll put Kyuhyun in my room."

I blink a few times. The last thing I want is a roommate. "Okay, great. When is he moving in?"

"I don't kn-"

The door opens and Sungmin starts and looks at it. I look back too, but I wasn't startled. I know who it is; it's you. Sungmin's jaw drops the slightest bit as you walk in and lock the door behind you.

"Hey," you say, walking over to us.

"What are you doing here?"

"Hi Sungmin." You smile and drop the key into my hand. "Here."

"Thanks." I pocket it.

"You gave him your key?" Sungmin looks between us with a raised eyebrow.

"He said he was going to come down. Why make one of us get up just to let him in?"

"But why is he here?" He chews on his fingertip, looking plainly at us.

"Visiting." You look at him for all of three seconds and then sit down and yawn into your hands.

"Sungmin's got a new friend," I say quickly, before Sungmin can ask why he's visiting.

"Not yet."

"No, he does."

"Not really."

"He does."

You laugh. "Who is it?"

I look at Sungmin, who rolls his eyes. "The new guy."

"What's his name, again?"

"Kyuhyun."

You snap your fingers and grin as if you were the one to remember his name. "That's it! Kyuhyun."

"What is it with you two and not remembering what his name is?"

"It was hard enough remembering the names of eleven members," I offer as an excuse.

"It wasn't that hard! Me and Donghae for example...you couldn't forget our names if you tried."

"Don't be so sure."

"You wouldn't!"

"Would you?" Donghae puts in innocently, eyeing our listening to the same song together jealously.

"I might forget yours," I answer in a deadpan tone. You laugh, picking up on my insincerity, but Sungmin nods as if agreeing with me.

"Anyway," Sungmin says, "he's going to live in our dorm."

"What?" you cry. "Why do you get all the young people? It's not fair."

"You have Kibum."

"But he's only one person and he's younger than me," you whine. "You guys have each other and everyone else is close to your age. I have Eeteuk and Heechul and Hankyung. They're old."

"Shall I tell them that you said that?" Sungmin smirks.

"Don't cause trouble," I sigh. "You know they're sensitive about it."

"But they talk about it all the time."

"It's like middle aged women, Donghae." I hand you the rest of my strawberry milk, ignoring Sungmin's glare as I share something he had given me with you. "They can complain about it, but you can never mention it."

"Well that's silly." You lift your eyebrows subconsciously. "They're not even that much older than us, either."

"You can't say that either. You don't want to take the age card away from them."

"So I can't mention it at all?"

"Right." I give you a thumbs up as you get it. "Not a word about it."

"You see, we know this because we're older than you."

"By months."

"It matters."

"No it doesn't!" You crumple the carton and pout. "Anyway...Want to play a game or something?"

"No," Sungmin says, yawning again and handing me my iPod again. He stands up and stretches. "I'm going to bed."

"You're not leaving because of me, right?"

I'm surprised that you even asked that. Sungmin looks at you in surprise for a few seconds, and I can tell that he feels uncomfortable.

"No," he says. "Sorry I didn't just say hello to you earlier..."

"It's okay." You smile.

"Good night."

He leaves, and you look at me. The door to his room shuts and you smile. I turn off my iPod and put it down. I don't need to listen to music when I can listen to you.

"So what do you want to do?"

"Let's go up to the roof."

"Why?"

"I want to talk."

"But it's freezing outside..."

"It's not that cold. Believe me."

"Okay." I stand up and get my shoes and jacket. "Is everything okay?"

"Yes." You smile reassuringly. "Let's just go talk for a while."

I follow you up the stairs, zipping up my jacket and stuffing my hands into my pockets as I go, and wondering what you want to talk about up on the roof, or if you really want to talk about anything at all. You open the door and let me go out first. It's cold, but you were right - it's not too cold. You walk to a corner of the roof and stop near the wall.

"He's still jealous." You sigh and sit down against the wall.

"He'll get over it." I sit down next to you and lay my head on your shoulder. "It's not that he doesn't like you, you know? I think he just doesn't...like it...that I have someone who I'm closer to than him now in our 'family.'"

"But it's different, isn't it? The way you're close to me and the way you're close to him."

"Of course. But that doesn't make him special. I mean...if it came down to a best friend contest, you would win."

"Why?"

"I just communicate better with you. Especially now that he's got this undercurrent of jealousy. I like you more."

"Should I feel bad that that makes me happy?" You laugh quietly. "I mean, it's not good for you and Sungmin, but...I like being the person who's closest to you."

"Don't feel bad. It's who you should be."

"I can't do anything about it, right?"

"Right. Just let him mature a little."

"Maturity...Do you think...we're more mature because of each other?"

"I can't say." I shrug. "I don't know what I'm like without you."

You reach across me and put your fingers in my pocket. I look up at you and smile. You smile back with the smile that you reserve for me, and I fall into the familiar sense of happiness that comes when I make the complete psychological shift to being your boyfriend first and your friend second.

"You're a part of me too," you say. Your smile grows, and I take your hand out of my pocket and push my fingers in between yours; the closest way I know how to hold your hand.

"I'm glad you cut your hair." I touch one of your short black locks. "You look good."

"Thank you."

"Seeing you with black hair again feels like seeing you without makeup on."

"Yeah?" You laugh. "Heechul has been talking about dying his orange again."

"I guess that suits him."

"Mmm." You nod. "I guess so. Whatever he does, he'll just be Heechul."

I laugh. "Right."

You laugh with me and then put your arm around my shoulders. It's almost like being hugged. The added warmth and shelter is welcome, up here on the roof. It's winter, but we don't really care, do we? I like it up here. I like being here with you, specifically.

"We have time now." You stare into space. "Years, maybe."

I look at your profile and feel as quiet as you look as your voice fades. I move closer to you and lay my head against your shoulder again after a minute. I don't know what to say. Yes, we have time. I don't think I've gone through the motions of understanding what that means yet. In the last few months, I haven't been able to keep the niggling possibility of separation out of my mind. I've cried about it a few times, because what can a person do? It's not in my control. But everyone has been crying. Nobody wanted to say goodbye.

I wanted more time with you. Be it another year, or two, or more after that, however improbable that was going to be. Now I don't know how long we'll be together in Super Junior. It's in our hands now; to see how far we can push ourselves and succeed as a group. As for you and me, I don't have any doubts about us.

"Hyukjae."

"Yeah?"

"You like playing hard to get, don't you?"

"It'd be a lie if I said no." Publicly, as Eunhae, it's what I do.

You laugh and put your finger beneath my chin. "Kiss me?"

"Why?"

"Because I want to be kissed."

Privately, what's the point in it? I don't have any reason to make you work for affection. It's not often you actually ask me to give it to you. Usually it just happens on its own. So if you ask me, it must be because you really need it. If it wasn't for me, you would feel lonely, wouldn't you? You need someone to love like this. Or maybe it's just a void that I both create and fill at once.

I get onto my knees in front of you and take your face gently in my hands. As I lean in to kiss you, you grab my collar and pull me closer by it. Our lips meet. I'm the easiest person in the world, aren't I? I fell for you without even making you try.

"Thanks."

"Are you worried?" I can't help but smile. You won't let go of me. "About the future."

"No. It's just..." You hesitate, words half formed in your mouth. "Just think about how much potential we have now."

"Scared?"

"No," you say, putting your hand over mine. "Excited."

We smile and kiss again, confirming that the feeling is mutual. You lower your hands to my waist and then break away, laughing.

"What's funny?" I straighten up and raise my eyebrow at you.

"How is it," you say, pinching the sides of waist, "that you eat so much, yet are still so skinny?"

"It's not my fault." I push your hands away, laughing. "Maybe I'm still growing."

"I don't think you're getting any taller."

"Then I'm just a food vacuum with an endless space to fill."

You laugh, covering your mouth with your hand. You don't really care if I'm skinny or not; I know that you like the way I look. You stand up, taking me with you, and your lips brush my cheek. I silently ask you if we're leaving, and I know from your eyes that we aren't. I lean against the wall and look at Seoul. Somewhere, people are still working on the next episode of a variety show, trying to come up with new ways to entertain. In less than eight hours, we'll probably go meet with them, or people connected to them. This is our world.

"I'm glad that we're sticking together," I say, smiling at the dark cityscape. "Even though it's kind of hard."

"Mmm." You touch my back lightly with your fingertips. "What's hard?"

"Being with you."

"You don't mean that, do you?"

"No." I smile sadly. "I don't."

You run your hands over my shoulders. "I know what it's like too, you know."

"I know you know," I laugh, looking back at you. "You're the other half."

"Your other half," you correct, somehow blinking at just the right point for emphasis. You smile and then put your chin on my shoulder, hugging me lightly. "Do you miss me?"

"I miss you." Actually saying it makes me feel like crying.

"Want to know something?"

"Sure."

"I miss you too," you whisper. "All the time."

"Oh," is all I can manage before I lose my voice to tears. Your arms tighten around me as soon as you feel that I'm crying.

"Which is why you said it's hard, isn't it?" Your breath is warm against my ear. How is it that you're never angry with me when I let you know what my feelings are? No matter what they are?

I nod slowly. "Yeah."

"Listen..." You take a deep breath. "If we split up tomorrow, how long would it take for you to stop thinking about me?"

"I don't know," I choke, uncomfortable with your choice of words. If we split up. The only thing that comes to mind in response to that is no. No, no, no, no, no. "A really long time."

"Years?"

"Yes."

"But even after then, you wouldn't forget me, would you?"

"No. Donghae, don't..."

"Relax." You kiss the edge of my jaw. "I'm not leaving you. Not even close."

"I know, but..."

"I want to know if it's hard on you. I want to know if it hurts."

"It's not really hard on me. It's just sometimes..." I trail off and try - and fail - to stop crying. "It's just that..."

"That what?"

"It isn't fair," I gasp. I hate crying to you like this, because I want to be more mature. I don't want you to know that I think things like it isn't fair, but I want to hide from you even less. "I want...I want the things other people want."

"I know."

"Honestly? You know what I want?" I look back at you, laughing for no reason. Laughing just because I'm upset.

"What do you want?"

"I want to sleep with you without caring about how other people think it's weird for two boys to want to sleep together, and how can we be such friends that want to do that? I want to fall asleep and wake up to you and not care that we have to get up at a certain time and act differently. I want..." I take a breath and wipe my tears away. "I want to live in a world where this is okay."

"This is okay," you whisper, turning me to face you. "This is okay."

"Doesn't it make you feel bad?" I whisper back. "Doesn't it make you feel bad to hide and lie and keep secrets from everyone?"

"Yes and no." You sigh. "I don't like it, but I don't mind doing it if I can be with you. Even if I only get five minutes alone with you to show you that I love you, it's worth it."

"Five minutes?"

"Five minutes." You smile. "Stop trying not to cry."

"I feel bad for crying about this," I say, letting myself be pulled into your embrace. "I'm really happy. It's just sometimes that I'm like this."

"I know," you say gently, massaging my neck with your fingertips. "Don't feel bad. I want all of your emotions, not just your happy ones. Okay?"

"God, you're so nice." I hug you tightly. I feel like my heart is swelling to a new size. "I love you."

"I love you too. I really love you."

"And now I don't want to leave you." I laugh. "It just sucks sometimes, doesn't it?"

"Maybe someday it will be different, yeah? Maybe someday we'll have the same home to go to."

"Maybe." I smile. "Would you live with me if we had the opportunity?"

"Don't ask that. You know the answer."

"Is it yes?"

I can feel you roll your eyes.

"Yes, it's yes," you say, letting go of me and kissing me quickly. "But don't get your hopes up too high, okay?"

I smile. "I won't."

"It should be past two in the morning." You bend your head and kiss the hollow of my neck. "Getting sleepy at all?"

"Crying makes me tired."

"You're an easy crier."

"Yeah, well..." I take a deep breath and steady myself. "At least I'm pretty when I cry."

"You're always pretty. But the truth is that I still wish I could take your tears away."

"You do."

"I do?" You smile. "Thanks."

"That...is my line."

You laugh and twine our fingers together, slowly nuzzling your head against my neck. Every little thing you do is filling the well, leaving me more complete. There isn't much I need in life, is there? I need you, and I need my friends and family, and I need my job. Beyond that, it's all just fluff, isn't it? Nothing material comes close to this.

"Let's stay up all night," you say. "Let's stay up until the sunrise."

"We have to work tomorrow." I kiss the side of your head. "We can't stay up."

"But I want to."

"You can't always get what you want, Donghae." I lean my head against yours. "We'll regret it if we don't sleep. And think of the questions we'd get for staying up all night on the roof."

"Not here. I'm already cold."

"Where?"

"Anywhere. In the dorm."

"It's impossible, love."

You sigh. "Then we really do have to part again."

"I'll see you tomorrow."

"You...weren't you just saying how you didn't want to part from me? And how you were having a hard time."

"I still know what we need to do." I pry one of my hands away and hug your neck. "It doesn't mean that I want to be alone. But I will anyway."

"What time are we getting up at?"

"Six, I guess."

"So we won't sleep long anyway."

"Some is better than none."

"Fine." You sigh again and lift your head. "So we'll see the sunrise either way."

"Yes." I kiss away your pout. "I'll make sure that I'm in the same car as you."

"Promise?"

"I promise."

"Tell me you don't want to go."

"I don't want to go," I say earnestly. You smile and kiss me again, longer this time than before. I guess the word for the contrast between the cold air and your warm kiss is lovely. At least, it's lovely to me. It's another reason for me to like winter. You kiss me again and then throw me a look that says I love you. You take my hand and lead me towards the stairs. As soon as we're inside, you squeeze my hand and then let go. As you always do. As you have to.

"I'll see you tomorrow," I say, leaving you at your door. You nod and leave me with a smile. I wonder if you'll still be smiling when you're on the other side of the closed door, back into the quiet dorm where everyone is sleeping. I wonder what you're like when you're alone sometimes. But I'm happy with the Donghae that you show me, and I get the feeling that the Donghae I know is more real than the one that other people know.

I make my way to my own dorm, and get ready for bed and then go to sleep, ignoring the clock. I don't care what time it is; I know I'm not going to get a lot of sleep. But I'll get what I can and like it.

"Wake up." Sungmin shakes my shoulder. "C'mon, Hyukjae. Wake up."

"No," I slur, turning away from him. "Sleep s'mportant."

"Why are you so sleepy?" he gasps exasperatedly. "You have to get up, Hyukjae!"

"Why?" I curl into a ball, further away from his hands and voice.

"Schedule!" He tears the blanket off of me and I swat at him.

"You didn't have to do that!" I shiver and stand up, swaying dizzily at first. "I'm up."

"Now you're up." He laughs. "Get ready to go."

I walk along the wall to the shower and try not to fall asleep in it. I dress and grab the things I'll need as quickly as I can and go. The first stop is the salon...where they make us beautiful. More attractive than we already are, that is.

You look even more tired than I am. You glance at me as you get into a van, and to my surprise, and surely yours, Sungmin pulls me towards the van that you entered. I sit down between the two of you. We greet each other with a tired glance, and Sungmin whips out his cellphone and starts playing a game on it. Let him. I just want to sleep.

You lightly tap me on the shoulder after we've driven for a ways and point out of the window. I blearily look up, first at you, and then at what you want me to see.

It's the sunrise; the very first hints of orange creeping up and promising a sunny day later. Winter sun is only so warm, but we both like sun. We didn't stay up all night to see it, but I feel as if we have. As soon as I look long enough to satisfy both you and me, I let my eyelids droop again.

[Next Part] Chapter Six: Black

Polychromatic Us: Chapter Four

aidenrose — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 08:40:35 GMT

Title: Polychromatic Us
Part: Chapter Four: Red
Previous Parts: Chapter One, Chapter Two, Chapter Three
Genre: Romance
Pairing: Donghae / Eunhyuk
Rating: PG-13 (sensuality)
Word Count: 3,684
Synopsis: Colors have always been there in our relationship...from the day I met you. If I were to tell our story, I’d do it with a canvas and paint; vibrant colors of every shade and hue.
Next Update: Tuesday, December 29th (barring no extreme writer's block)

I'm sorry that this took me such a long time to finish! =\ From now on I'm going to try to make this series biweekly. I would make it weekly, but I'm still not sure that I can flesh out every chapter in a week yet. We'll see how it goes later on! This is only chapter four out of thirteen, after all. ^^

I am back from Brazil, and my exams are over with until I start college. I still have to study, but I want to write as much as I can before then. I love writing, and I have a lot of stories in my head right now. Most of them are Eunhae, hahaha. ~~who's surprised?~~ Also, thank you all so much for the comments you left me. From now on too, I'll try to answer them!

Also, you guys can now ask me anything anonymously. I don't know if anyone has questions that they want to ask anonymously (or at all), but...it was a thing I created for fun, and then I thought it might be cool to reveal it here too.

Last...HAPPY BIRTHDAY, inny_cent !!! You know how awesome you are, don't you? :D

Okay! Please read and enjoy! ^ ^ /

Red

"What?" Sungmin's head snaps up. "You're not coming?"

"No," I say patiently. "I have a headache."

"But Donghae can come!"

"He has a headache." You point at me and smile at Sungmin. "So I'm gonna stay with him instead. Besides, I'm tired too."

"But we're a team now! All of us!" He motions to the rest of the group, the people who we're slated to debut with next year. They're talking amongst themselves in small groups and getting their things together after practice. It's only Sungmin who is really bothered by us not joining them. And I know it's because he sees how close I am to you, and it bothers him when I choose to be alone with you, even though I've told him that I can have multiple best friends. We haven't changed. He just thinks we have.

"Sungmin, it's just this once." I sigh and pull my hat down over my eyes.

"But food will help if you've got a headache."

"What I really need is just some quiet time, okay? I need to lie down."

"Okay..." He pouts characteristically and shrugs. "Fine. Donghae, you're really not coming either? Aren't you hungry?"

"I'll eat at the dorm. Go have fun! We'll come next time." You start pushing me out the door and wave. I throw an apology over my shoulder and start walking. As we leave, I notice Eeteuk asking Sungmin what's going on, but I don't care enough to go back and explain it myself. What Sungmin will tell him is fine.

I glance at you as you fall into step beside me and comfortingly touch my shoulder. Today was a particularly long day of training, and I've had a headache that has steadily grown worse in painful waves for the last two hours. As we near the dorm, you sigh and express the hope that everyone else went out to dinner together tonight.

You unlock the door and let me walk in first. I head straight for my room, pausing only to take my shoes off, and collapse on my bed, letting my bag fall to the floor an instant before.

"Oh, sweetie," you laugh. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," I say, putting my hand over my eyes. "Just hurts."

"Long day today."

I nod. You sit down on the bed next to me and half lie down to hug me. You ask me what I need, and I murmur that I just need quiet for a while. You say okay, kiss my cheek, and say that you're going to go see what's around for food. I watch you leave, smile at you when you glance back, and then shut my eyes.

I'm so tired today that I can't even move. And the easiest thing in the world is to sink into your own bed after a long day.

"Hyukjae."

I open my eyes again. Only for you will I make the effort to lift my eyelids when they feel like lead. You're standing in the doorway, sucking on a lollipop.

"I'm gonna shower. Wanna come?"

I wave my hand listlessly. "Who knows if they all went together or not? Don't know if one of 'em will come back soon."

"This is as private as it gets here."

You lean against the doorframe, waiting for my reply. You narrow your eyes when you don't get one.

"Fine. Take a nap if you want to. But shower after me, okay?"

I blow you a kiss, and you smile and disappear again. I know that if I did shower with you today, it wouldn't be for the sake of water conservation. You would kiss me and be sweet and affectionate, and as much as I would love it and ignore my headache just to be intimate with you like that, we really don't know if everyone went together or not. No matter how we played it, it would be awkward if someone came back early. So today I'll take sleep as the safer path to preserve future opportunities.

I roll onto my side and close my eyes again, telling my headache to just go away in the quiet and dark. I hear the shower turn on in the distance and imagine that it's rain, washing over everything and creating a sleepy cloak that wraps around me.

"Hyukjae." The bed bows as your weight is added to it. You shake my shoulder. "Hyukjae...?"

"Nnnnn," I moan. You laugh quietly. If I have to be woken up, it's almost always you who I want to be woken up by. You know when I'm in the mood to be messed with and when I'm not.

"I let you sleep for an hour...How do you feel?"

"A little better."

"Does it still hurt?"

"Not as much." I'm trying not to let it come back as I wake up.

You pull me up until I'm sitting and hug me. I limply lean against you and use your shoulder as a pillow. For a minute, you just hold me, and when I'm about to fall asleep against you, you jerk me awake by letting go and taking my shirt off.

"Wh-"

"Go shower." You laugh and pull me to my feet. "And then you need to eat."

"I want to sleep," I complain, blushing as you hold onto my waist, of all places, as I gain my balance.

"You can sleep later." You kiss me and pull me to the bathroom. "You'll sleep better after you shower."

"Fine." I push you out of the bathroom with my foot and then close the door. I roll my eyes at my reflection; it's just like you to make me do what you think is best for me. Even though I am hungry, I really just want to sleep. And then it occurs to me that you might have woken me up so that you can have some time alone with me before the others get home. I feel a little bit guilty for sleeping so long, so I take a quick shower, ignoring the threatening stabs of a returning headache in my right temple.

I dry off my hair and send a withering glare at the lights. Which wasn't very smart, because it hurts to look at them. I look for my clothes, and then realize that I didn't bring in clean clothes to change into. You didn't let me. I sigh, laugh, and then tie my towel around my waist and step out of the bathroom.

The others haven't come back yet, thankfully. Hopefully they won't come back for another hour, and I can make up for the time I spent sleeping. I know the reason you came back isn't just to be with me because I have a headache. You want time with me. And I want that too. We don't get a lot of time together alone...and maybe that's why we haven't gotten tired of each other. I see you everyday as your friend and future band mate, but that isn't the same thing.

Fortunately, you aren't in my room, and I can get dressed in peace.

"Donghae?" I throw my towel around my neck and walk towards the living room, pulling the hem of my shirt down over my hips.

"Mm?"

"What are you watching?" I fall onto the couch next to you, and I naturally find myself leaning against your side with your arm around my shoulders. I kiss your cheek to draw your eyes away from the screen.

"Just some variety show." You smile and stretch. "Nothing too interesting."

"Commercials..." I sigh. "I wonder how I'll feel if I start seeing my friends - or maybe even myself - appear on them. Wouldn't it be kind of weird?"

"Who would want to use you as their spokesperson?"

"I don't know..." I laugh uncomfortably. "You know what I'm saying."

"I'm teasing you. You're supposed to say 'who wouldn't want to use me?'" You take my towel off of my neck and run your fingers through my hair. "Your hair's wet."

"Don't." I still your hands before you try to dry my hair for me. "My headache is still here."

"Still?" You frown and drape my towel over my head. "Maybe you're getting sick."

"I don't think so..." I close my eyes and you gently massage my temples with your fingertips. Even if it only helps a little bit, the most important thing to me is the way you treat me. I wait until you hug me to remind you that I'm hungry.

"I haven't forgotten."

"What I meant is that I want to eat." I hug you anyway.

"I understand."

"Going to let me?"

"In a minute." You sigh against my neck. "I miss you."

"I miss you too."

You lean into me until I fall backwards and cushion my head with your hand so that it doesn't hit the sofa. I gaze up at you with the traces of my old shyness and you smile.

"I like you." I smile playfully at you, even though I'm seriously trying to express myself.

"I know." You kiss me and then whisper something so quietly that I miss it.

"What?"

"Nothing." You kiss me again.

"I missed what you said."

"It's okay. I'll say it again."

"Now?"

"No, I'll let you eat now."

"Yay." I laugh.

"Want me to carry you?"

"Tch, I can walk."

"I know you can." You pull me to my feet. "I'm just offering."

I kiss you and walk the ten steps to the kitchen. I think about how often we kiss, usually in the dark, quickly and quietly, only to remind ourselves and each other that we're still in love. My hand pauses on the door of the refrigerator and I stare into its contents without seeing anything for a moment. Is that what it is? I ask myself. Are we in love?

"There are leftovers in there from yesterday." You yawn and sit down at the table. "There's stuff."

"Stuff?" I stare at the shelves blankly. I don't even know what I'm looking for.

"First shelf."

"Right."

I reheat a plate of food and eat without making conversation with you. You lie with your head on your arms, blinking slowly at the center of the table and glancing up at me every now and again. I told you once that you could go back to the television, but you smiled and said that you wanted to be with me. So you're here with me.

"Are you really that tired?" you ask quietly.

"Why?"

"You're just quieter than normal."

"I have a headache."

"Yeah, but...is that all?"

"That's all." I smile and stand up. "I'm just kind of stressed and tired."

"Okay..." You stand up too and take my plate from me. "Go lie down."

"Don't you want to...?"

"I'll spend time with you in your room." You pat my shoulder. "Go rest. Oh, but brush your teeth first. You know you won't get up again once you lie down."

I laugh. "You're right, I won't. Hey..."

You tilt your head questioningly. "What's up?"

"Nothing." I shake my head and touch your cheek briefly. "You're just sweet."

You laugh, and smiling and biting your lip shyly at the same time, turn to clean up as I go to brush my teeth. I spend as little time as required on that, and fall into my bed. I'm not getting up again, no matter what. I pull the comforter up over my head and sigh, sinking into the mattress. I keep myself awake, because I don't want you to just let me sleep. You don't make me wait long. I look up when I hear you come into the room and watch you close the door.

I move over, and you sit down next to me and pull my hand out.

"Geez, your hands are cold." I turn onto my side and cover your hands with mine. You just look at me, your expression quiet and thoughtful, and maybe even a little amused.

"It's cold," you say simply.

"Not here."

"Not there," you agree. You smile, and when your hands are warm, I let go. But you keep one of my hands in yours, and twine our fingers together closely.

"Do you think they went to karaoke?"

"Mmm." You nod. "Probably."

"Singing, huh..." I exhale tiredly. "You know...how Sungmin said that we're all a team?"

You nod.

"I know why, but...it's not really true."

"What do you mean?"

"Some of us will be replaced, right?"

You're silent for a few moments. Then you nod again.

I lower my eyes to your waist and you smooth my hair. I just like having you this close. And that's what it is, I think. There is something on my mind, and it's been there for a while.

"What if it's you or me?"

"That'd be too bad, after just one year."

"Of course, I'm really happy that we're debuting..."

"But?"

"But it isn't it kind of sad? After we debut, there will be so much more attention focused on us. And there will be even less time, and then after that we might not live in the same place anymore. Having to work that hard at hiding what we really are, too."

"But we knew it would happen," you say quietly. "Eventually."

"That doesn't change how I feel about it now that I know when."

"It's not now. It's not even an end, Hyukjae. Not if we don't want it to be."

"I know, but..."

"But what?" You smile. "You just want more time with me?"

"Yeah. I don't know. I just don't want to have to work so hard to not show affection for you."

"So let's sell it." You turn towards me all the way and grin. "We don't have to hide everything."

"Wh-"

"Think about it! Girls love it when boys show affection for each other. So why not, really?"

"That won't work." I sit up on my elbows and frown at you.

"Why won't it? It'd be easier for us and more fun for everyone else. And everyone here knows we...well, they just know that we're best friends. Nothing would be a surprise to them."

"People aren't that stupid. What if they start thinking that we're not just playing?"

You shrug. "As long as they can't prove it. So no kissing...I mean, not on the lips. Not too much of anything."

"You're talking about just...I don't know, hugging, if something good happens?"

"Yeah. Whatever is right in the moment."

"Hugging is okay..."

"Of course hugging is okay." You laugh. "If we can make it attractive, then why not? For a little more freedom."

"Okay," I say. "Okay, okay."

"Not convinced?"

"No, but...Okay."

"You trust me."

"I trust me more."

"That's fine." You make a face and then lie down next to me beneath the comforter. I blush initially as I get used to how close your body is to mine. "But you do trust me."

"Yes, yes. I do."

I lie on my back and make room for you on my pillow, and you make use of it. Your hair falls over your eyes like a soft veil. We smile at each other, and I remind myself that the most important moment in time is right now. Right now I don't need to think about the future. We'll think about it and talk about it past today, anyway.

"But there's another problem," I say, as an afterthought.

"What's that?" You look at me curiously and stroke my hand with your thumb. I notice it, but it doesn't distract me anymore. It's like a habit. I look at your shoulder, unsure of what I really want to say.

"I like you now more than before. Back then...you know, when we just started out, I didn't think that it was possible to like a person more and more, when I liked you so much already. But clearly...it's like a room. Once the room is filled up, the roof will have to be raised. You don't know that you can like a person more until you just do, and..."

"Hey," you say quietly. "Are you trying to say that you love me?"

I glance at you and blush.

"No, when I want to say that, I'll just say it. I'm saying that it's getting harder to keep it a secret, just with that..."

"You can do it," you say. Your thumb stills for a second and then continues. "And by the way, I'm falling for you too."

I look up slowly and meet your gaze. You're serious.

"Already?" I swallow. "I thought it would take longer."

"Doesn't take a long time when you're with someone so lovable. And this is a long time to you? How long has it been? Almost two years, right?"

"But we're only eighteen, and..." I stop as I realize what you've said, and my heart skips a beat. You make it do this on a regular basis. "Doesn't matter, does it."

"It's a good feeling, isn't it?" I wonder if your voice could be any gentler or sweeter.

"Yeah," I say after a few seconds. After I've found my voice again. I turn onto my side and press my face against your shoulder. You put your arms around me, and I can feel you smile. All of it together forces tears out of my eyes, and even though I'm usually completely relaxed when you're holding me, my chest feels tight, as if there's a thick knot in the center.

"Why are you crying?" You kiss my forehead and stroke my back slowly.

"It's just hard." I close my eyes and turn to cherishing this moment of physical and emotional closeness. "I love you."

"I love you too." You kiss my cheek, teasing my face away from your shoulder until you can kiss my mouth. My lips part beneath yours, and you deepen the kiss until I can feel it all throughout my body, like a warm syrup that spreads through everything to my fingers and toes. My body and lips and heart respond to you, expanding my sudden sense of oneness with you. This is what I love you feels like.

After an eon, your mouth leaves mine, leaving me breathless and flushed, and you kiss my face, planting soft physical whispers of affection against my skin. I can feel your pulse, so I know you must be able to feel mine racing, too.

You stop kissing me and laugh. "My god, your face is red."

"It's your fault..." I want to punch myself for talking. You raise your eyebrows, amused. "That was intense..."

"You said you loved me, so..."

"I do love you." Against all possibility, I can feel myself blush more. "I'm not complaining."

"Yeah, I kind of figured." You touch one of my burning cheeks lightly. "If blood is red, and blood goes through the heart...the heart must be red. And if the heart is where we feel...then love must be red too, right?"

"I...never thought of it as having a color."

"It probably has a unique color, if it has one. But if it were to have a color that we know...don't you think it would be red?"

"Yeah," I find myself saying. "Red is warm."

"Like love." You laugh and lie on your side again. I hadn't even realized that you had ever left that position until you returned to it. "Can I sleep here?"

"They'll ask questions." It pains me to say anything other than yes, of course, please stay with me.

"They won't care. Everyone sleeps together now and then. And you're lucky enough to have your own room, so it's not like I'm infringing on anyone else's privacy."

"Fine."

"What?"

"Stay."

You blink a few times. "Wow, that was easy."

"Well it's not like I don't want you here."

"True." You kiss my cheek and I snuggle into you. You laugh again and reach back to turn out the light. "You get so sweet when you're tired."

"I can't help it."

"I know." You wrap yourself around me and sigh in the dark. "You should get tired more often."

"Euh...if this were summer, I'd kill you."

"It's cold, so shut up."

"I said if it were summer! And am I not sweet normally, or something? Why do I have to get exhausted?"

"Hey, Hyukjae."

"What?"

"I'm really happy." You let those words sink in for a second. "This...everything is such a good experience for me. Working with you and everyone else everyday towards the same goal. I feel like we're really lucky - even though it's complicated and frustrating - like most couples don't get this kind of opportunity to bond over more than just...being a couple. All of it makes me happy. You make me really happy."

When I don't give you any reply, simply because I can't, you go on.

"I really care about you. I love you."

"I know." I smile into your shoulder. I realize that I do know. That I have known without hearing it from your lips. "You don't have to say it for me to know."

"But I want you to hear it."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome."

"Do you need me to tell you, too?"

"No."

My smile widens. "Do you want me to tell you?"

"Yeah." You laugh quietly. "I like the way it sounds."

"I love you."

"And so...they lived happily ever after."

We both laugh. I can't believe how cheesy you can be, but what's worse is that I just find it cute right now. I don't even pause to think about the likelihood of a happily ever after. I just laugh, and then I stop laughing. I only murmur the words 'good night', and you only barely tell me to have sweet dreams. I smile as I fall asleep, thinking that it's funny to have told you all of three times that I love you, when I never meant to in the first place. But I do.

[Next Part] Chapter Five: Orange

Polychromatic Us: Chapter Three

aidenrose — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 08:37:07 GMT

Title: Polychromatic Us
Part: Chapter Three: Blue
Previous Parts: Chapter One, Chapter Two
Genre: Romance
Pairing: Donghae / Eunhyuk
Rating: PG-13 (sensuality)
Word Count: 4,226
Synopsis: Colors have always been there in our relationship...from the day I met you. If I were to tell our story, I’d do it with a canvas and paint; vibrant colors of every shade and hue.
Next Update: No specific date.

BOY, did I have a hard time writing this. I'm so late because of it... ;_; I am very sorry!!! Many thanks go to my best friend and beta tvxqsocks for all her patient support and help editing and getting rid of my Polychromatic Us!writer's block. Thank you! <3 ILY! ^^

Today I went down to the beach at night, because there is a beautiful full moon here in Brazil...and I wrote "Super Junior" in huuuuuuuuge letters, and then dotted the i with a heart and wrote "haehyuk" in Korean in it. :D

I'm a Cyworld noob~ D:

Okay! Please read and enjoy! ^ ^ /

Blue

The sky outside my window is a perfect shade of blue, cloudless and vast. It's so clear and pretty that it feels like I'm looking at a painting inside of a dream. I feel like going to the park and lying on the grass and simply enjoying the weather, but I'm stuck in my room staring at my cellphone, caught in a downward spiral of indecision and indecisiveness.

It's been a week since I took you to my home for my birthday, and I haven't seen you outside of classes since then. Even inside of class, we don't talk, and it's confusing me and all of our friends. Usually I would gravitate towards you after practice, or you would seek me out, and one way or another we would end up spending more time together. But now it feels like there's a wall of unspoken reasons keeping us apart.

Simply put, we're avoiding each other.

It's been hours since I've woken up, and because it's the weekend, I don't have anything to do. I've gone through my normal routine, uncharacteristically skipped a meal, and have thought of nothing else but doing something - namely calling you - to put an end to this.

I select your number again and stare moodily at it. I don't want to avoid you - I want to be with you. I wish I had a flower to pick the petals from, alternating between deciding to call you and not call you, so that somehow the decision could be made for me. But even if I did that, and landed on not calling you, I wouldn't settle for it.

Actually, I know what I want to do. It's just doing it that is proving so difficult for me.

It's just a button that I have to press. One press of a button, and I'd call you, and you would probably pick up. I could hear your voice, and talk with you again. I can imagine a thousand things that I want to say, one after another, for years. I sigh dejectedly. I want you to know that I like you...I just don't have the confidence to tell you. If I confess to you, and you don't like me, it will be awkward for both of us, and will almost definitely make it impossible to be friends.

Now that I'm experiencing what it's like when you're absent from my life, I don't, I don't, I don't want that to happen.

But if I don't say anything, I feel like I'm risking us just drifting apart. What happened that day wasn't even a big deal. It wasn't like you kissed me. I blush, and bite my lip so hard that it hurts, and move my thumb over the button to call you. Nothing happened. I count to three twice and then press call. I can feel my cheeks growing hotter before you've even picked up, and when you do, my heart starts hammering.

"Hyukjae." Your tone is surprised. Maybe even a little bit pleased.

"Hi," I say breathlessly. "Good time?"

"Always."

I close my eyes, defeated. Always, you say.

"When you say that, I forget why I called." I laugh sadly. "Honestly..."

"What did you want to say?"

"I was going to ask why it feels like I haven't seen you at all."

"I'm sorry," you say. "I know it's been distant."

"Why has it been?"

I turn my head away and cough in the long silence that follows my question. "Did I do something?"

"No!" you say quickly. "It wasn't you."

"'Wasn't'? So can we go back to normal now?"

"To normal?" You pause. "Who knows? Anyway, I miss you. I was going to call you. Where are you?"

"In my room." You miss me after a week. And if I miss you after a week, and I like you, does that mean that you like me? I sigh inwardly. Not necessarily. After all, friends miss each other too.

"What are you doing in your room? It's beautiful. You should come outside."

"Where are you?" I look out of the window again.

"Out," you say cutely.

"Alone?"

"No, but I can be."

"Why?" I bite my lip, anticipating your answer.

"For you, of course." The answer that I wanted to hear. "Just say that you'll meet me."

"Hey," I say softly, unable to stop myself. "Why do you treat me like this? So nicely."

"Aren't I nice to everyone?"

"Yes, but...do you treat everyone like this?"

"Will you come out and meet me?"

"Where?"

"Have you eaten anything?"

"No."

"What's the matter with you? It's like three o'clock." You sigh. "Let's go eat, then."

"Okay." I sit up and smile at the sky. "Where?"

"Let's decide later. Come meet me first."

"Right now?"

"Yes!"

I laugh, and you tell me where to meet you. You say goodbye and hang up, forcing me to get a move on. I wash my face again and change into a different set of clothes, and then I grab my wallet and the key to my dorm and leave. So easy, once I called you, to reestablish a connection with you.

When I see you, my heart feels like it's going to stop, and I take a second to linger a distance away and just look at you.

Why do I feel so starved? As if I hadn't seen you at all.

I walk towards you, and you spot me and meet me halfway, wearing a smile that me shows more genuinely than any words could that you're happy to see me. I'm sure that the same feeling is expressed in my own irrepressible smile.

"Hi," you say, something about your voice striking me as sweet. "Long time no see, it feels like."

"Yeah. Did you wait long?"

You shake your head. I want to touch you, to hold your hand, to hug you, even to kiss you. I wish that I had the freedom to express myself like that, but I absolutely, truly, positively don't. If only, if only, if only, I think.

"Let's go!"

You lead me to a café that you like, and after wondering for a moment over how quickly you've adapted to this city and found favorites, and looking over the menu for far too long, we order flavored bubble tea, and I order a sandwich. You aren't really hungry, you say, so you don't order anything else.

We sit down at a table, and you apologize for being so distant. I tell you that it isn't your fault, and that I didn't do anything to make it better over the week either.

"But," you say, leaning your chin into your hands on the table and pouting, "you called me."

"Yeah," I say quietly. "I'm really happy that you picked up...I thought you might not have."

"No, I...I wanted to talk to you."

"About what?"

"That's..." You wave your hand, as if searching for words. "It's not important. Just to talk about stuff, you know? About nothing."

"I like talking to you."

"God, me too! I missed talking...we just click, don't we? I like having a friend like that, who understands me."

"I see." I laugh, blushing at my response, but fortunately one of the employees brings what we ordered to our table, and you don't seem to notice. I understand you less than you think - about normal stuff, stuff I might talk about with anyone, I do understand you well - but when it comes to knowing how you feel about me...

"Eat," you say. "Stop spacing out."

"Sorry." I let my eyes fall to my sandwich and dig in. I'm really hungry. I knew that it was stupid to not eat anything earlier, but I wasn't in the mood to eat. Now I'm ravenous - too hungry to feel self conscious eating in front of you, thankfully. Sometimes I get the feeling that you're watching me eat, but I don't want you to notice me noticing you, so I don't look up.

"Feel better?" you ask as I finish.

"Much."

"Good." You smile and bite your straw. "You should eat properly."

"I know." I pick up my tea and sip it.

"Does this ever make you wonder what you'll lose?" you ask musingly, stirring your tea around and trying to capture the tapioca pearls with your straw. "If we debut and become famous."

"Does what?"

"Just sitting in public, and talking...and eating...just being out in public, with no one noticing you."

"I hadn't thought about it." I rest my chin in my palm. "But...with everything you gain, you always lose something."

"You think it's worth it?

I shrug. "It's what I want. Isn't it what you want too? To be a singer?"

You nod. "But sometimes, I wonder what a normal adult life would be like."

"Like our parents' lives."

"Think, though - that kind of life isn't something that we'll ever experience for ourselves if we become idols. We won't have the privacy and anonymity to play with. The youngest years of our adult lives will be spent under a critical eye..."

"But it's my dream." I smile hesitantly. "This is what I really want to do."

"Yeah. It's a dream."

"The dream."

"Mm." You nod. "Shall we go?"

"Where to?"

"Was there somewhere you wanted to go to?"

"Mmm...I was thinking it was a really nice day, and I wanted to go to a park." I pause and laugh. "I didn't, though."

"We can go now! There won't be that many people there anymore. It's kind of late in the afternoon, so it's not really the popular time..."

"Would that be okay?"

"Yeah! I want to go too."

"Okay, let's go!" I stand up and start walking, and you catch up with me and talk about singing as we walk there. It's a short walk, but there isn't a moment of silence as we talk about whatever comes to mind, switching through subjects as easily as water slips through our fingers.

"It's so empty," I say as we walk a little further into the park from one of the main entrances. "And it's such a nice day!"

"But you were indoors, too. And it is a big park." You skip ahead and start walking up a hill towards a botanical display. This kind of park isn't just for people to come and lie in the sun and play with their children. It's almost geared for tourism. It has traditional buildings and displays of flowers, meticulously maintained gardens, and paths that lead to more secluded areas, all worked into one beautiful sprawling place.

It's on one of those paths that I follow you, until we reach a practically deserted part of the park and you look back, as if remember that I'm here. It's quiet, and still, and beautiful here. Throughout not just this part of the park, but all of it, flowering trees are in full bloom.

"You like this?" you ask, walking backwards and smiling at me until I catch up with you. "Nature, I mean."

"Yeah, but I think I like cities more. There's more to do. And I'm used to them, so..." I shrug. "Maybe I wouldn't say that if there weren't parks."

"I want to...go to the ocean." Your smile widens. "I haven't been in a while."

"Maybe during summer break..."

"We should all go together!" You blink as if you've said something wrong, or you've just remembered something or had a sudden idea. "We should go together."

"What?"

"Never mind." You wave your hand. "When it's summer, we can talk about it, after all. It's not for a while still."

"Okay..." I wonder what you meant by taking out the all in we should go together.

"It's fun," you say, swatting playfully at branches as we walk. "It's always fun with you."

"I don't think that I'm very fun."

"I think you are. All of your friends do, too."

"Oh?" I can't help but smile. "That's nice to know."

"I think that...you're the best thing that's happened to me since I came here."

I blush. "Well, you introduced yourself. You made it happen."

"Aren't you glad that I did?"

"Absolutely" is the answer that escapes my lips. I want to say more. I want you tell you how I really feel so badly, but I'm too afraid to take the risk. Just thinking about it makes my heart beat faster with nervousness.

"I'm happy that you called me."

Your hand brushes mine as you pass me, making my heart leap. I thought for a second that you were going to hold my hand. I want to hold your hand so badly that it hurts.

"Actually, it is important."

"What is?" I put my hand in my pocket to get rid of the impression that yours left on it.

"The thing I wanted to talk about."

"Oh," I say, giving you my attention. "Okay."

"Listen..." you come to a stop and look at me hesitantly. You open your mouth a few times, and then sigh with frustration and run your hand through your hair. You take a step towards me and then take a short breath and speak in a rushed, exasperated tone.

"I like you." My heart skips a beat. "You're my best friend."

My heart sinks a little, and I smile weakly and look at the ground. It would be nice for someone else, I think, to hear that. I know it's my own fault that I feel so let down and disappointed. You're my best friend. It should be all I want, but I want so much more. I thought your hesitation might have meant that you would tell me that you want to be more than friends.

"Hyukjae."

I have to force myself to look up at you.

"I really like you."

"Like me how?" I ask, a broken, short laugh escaping with my words. I can't help myself but to ask. It hurts so much that I can't take it anymore. I need to know how you feel.

You bite your lip for half a second, and as you open your mouth to answer me, my pent up feelings and pain force themselves to the surface, and I say more.

"Because I don't like you as a friend. I like you, you know? I like you so much that it hurts."

In the silence after my words, I blush with embarrassment. I can't look at you anymore - not even to see what kind of expression you're wearing. Why won't you say anything? Why couldn't I have been happy with best friends and gone on a little longer without knowing?

You won't say anything, I realize. You don't feel the same. Even though it's the last thing I want to do at a moment like this, I can't help it: I'm crying. I turn away, trying to hide it, and then I realize that I shouldn't be here at all anymore. So I take a step backwards, prepared to walk - or run - away.

"Sorry," I say hollowly. "I'll leave first."

"Wai-"

You grab my arm and jerk me back. My heart leaps in disbelief as you lean in and kiss me, holding onto both of my arms with an increasingly gentle grip. All of my thoughts of leaving, of confusion, of being rejected, are gone, replaced by euphoria. I didn't know that lips felt like this, or that kissing inspired such a sense of intimacy with the other person. It's sweet and unique.

Your lips slowly leave mine, and I remember to breathe. At some point I had closed my eyes without realizing it, and I open them now to find you smiling at me, your face so close for an instant that I could have counted your eyelashes. I smile shyly, too dazed - too stunned - to really smile at you with as much emotion as I'm feeling yet.

"Okay?" You brush my tears off of my cheeks and then put your hands on my shoulders. "I like you like that too."

I feel like I should say something, but I'm in too much shock to. You start laughing at my expression and pull me closer, and I hug you. For the first time, I want you to feel my heart beating. You fit perfectly in my arms; I fit perfectly in yours. I know that later I'll really understand how my world has just changed, but for now I don't want to think. For now it's enough to feel exactly in the present.

"I thought you liked me...I thought that you couldn't be this shy with everyone...and so I tried telling you without telling you," you say quietly. "And then I tried telling you, and couldn't. Your birthday..."

"So that's..." my voice is so quiet that if we were any further apart, you wouldn't be able to hear. "That's what that was..."

"I didn't want to ruin your birthday if I was wrong." You laugh quietly. "Sorry."

"How...how long've...?"

"Since the beginning."

"All this time?"

"Couldn't you tell?"

"Not...not really."

You let go of me and look at me with one raised eyebrow. "Who else flirts with you?"

"F-Flirts?" I stammer, blushing. "No one!"

"I'm the only one, right?"

"No one else...talks to me like you do."

"That's good." You sit down on a low stone wall and pat the space next to you, inviting me to sit next to you. "I'd be upset if someone else was..."

"I don't like anyone else," I say as I sit beside you. If I was going to calm down and stop blushing, now it's really impossible. "J-...just you."

You kiss my cheek quickly, and I surprise myself and you by laughing lightly.

"What?" You smile at me, leaning forward so that you would be in my field of vision even if I weren't looking directly at you. But I am, and my smile has turned into a grin.

"I'm just really happy."

"Me too." You brush my bangs away from my eyes and then stroke my face, as if brushing something away. But I know that there isn't anything there. You're just touching me. "Can I call you my boyfriend?"

"When talking to whom?" I don't even try to keep my face from showing how ecstatic I am - and why should I? I want you to know.

"To me."

"Yes."

"You can call me yours too."

"'Kay."

We laugh. I almost feel dizzy, and I dig one of my fingernails into my palm to check if I'm dreaming. You kissed me, and confessed to me, and now you've asked me to be your boyfriend.

"To whom..." you wonder quietly, leaning back on your hands and looking up at the fragments of the sky through the leaves. "I guess we can't tell anyone, huh. I mean...no one."

I shake my head. "No one can know."

"That's going to be hard."

I look at you, at the way you're biting your lip as you always do, and your small frown as you think. The way the wind lightly ruffles your hair, and the way your neck stretches as you tilt your head back, and think that you, who are already one of the best friends, want to be my boyfriend. I think that it's worth it to give it at least a chance, with all of the effort that we can give, even though it will be difficult.

"But we don't have a choice, right?" You look at me and smile.

"I don't."

"I don't."

"So we don't." I laugh. "I wasn't expecting anything else, anyway. I mean...I don't want people to know. It wouldn't be..."

"Comfortable," you say. "Even if we weren't both boys...it would be weird, right?"

"A little."

"I really want to be with you. I don't like lying, or being sneaky...and I'm not good at it...but it's not like we're hiding something bad. Or that we're doing it for a bad reason."

"Right...it's just for our own sakes...and everyone's sakes, really. It's just to have things be quiet and simple."

"But it's not just not telling anyone..." You sigh. "We can't give it away by our behavior."

"Like now." I blush.

"Yeah, like now. People know we're really good friends. It's okay if they know we're best friends. In fact, it's good if they do...they just can't think that we're anything more than best friends."

"I wonder what happens if..." I pause and consider the chances. "You know, we don't debut together. How we'd see each other."

"We can't do anything about that." You sigh again. "But even if we do...we won't have time alone together. Not really, you know? Maybe moments, maybe even hours...but we wouldn't really be alone - like in a dorm, we can't really be alone..."

"I know." I grimace. "But it'd be worse if we don't debut together."

"In that case, only moments..." You look at me seriously. "Can you do that?"

I shrug. "We can still talk."

"I want to do more than talk," you whine. "But I can do it! I mean, I think I'd be okay if that's what it came to."

"It's okay with me."

"You'd miss me, wouldn't you?"

I blush, and you smile and nod. "Yeah, I know."

"I hope we debut together," I say quietly. "Wouldn't it be fun?"

"It'd be amazing!"

"We just have to hope for it, then..."

"Mhmm!" You stand up and pull me up by my hand. "C'mon, let's walk. There's no one here today."

"Okay." Telling myself to not be so shy, I hold your hand as we walk. At first we don't say anything, but then we start talking again - about nothing in particular. Just conversation, as we've always had. The only difference is that my hand is in yours, and maybe some shift towards closeness that wasn't there before.

But then I remember something that, feeling as happy as I am now, I tell you without thinking that it might be embarrassing.

"That was my first kiss."

"I know."

"How do you know?"

"I just know."

"Anyway, I wanted it to be with you."

"Why are you so cute?" You laugh. "This is why I like you!"

"I'm cute?" I blush.

"Yes you are!" You laugh again and then make an amendment to your previous statement. "One of the reasons I like you. I don't mind saying it, that you're cute. You've always liked me, haven't you?"

"Yeah...since before I met you...actually."

"So why did we take so long?"

"I don't know." I laugh. "I guess because be both weren't really sure?"

"I guess so..." You come to a stop and look at your cellphone to check the time, making me realize that it's getting darker. We're still holding hands, and I can't stop smiling because of it. Because of you. "Want to go have fun and eat and then head home before curfew?"

"Yeah...What time is it?"

"It's past six already."

"Already?" I blink. "That doesn't seem right."

You shrug, smiling. "Time flies."

"What if I hadn't called you? What if you hadn't picked up?"

"Then we wouldn't be like this." You smile and squeeze my hand. "Not yet, anyway. Someway or another, we'd get here, I think."

You pull me away from the path and down a slope towards a small garden. But we don't stop at the garden, as I thought we might, to admire it. It's hard to see anyway, as the light is quickly dimming. Soon the light and the sky will be the same soft shade of blue. You lead me into a small grove of trees and hug me, and for a second, I think you're older than me for some reason.

Minutes go by, but I don't count them. I'm just perfectly content to hug you and be hugged by you here, only the second time since we've become people who openly like each other. I'll never get tired of this, I think. I'll always want to be hugged by not just someone like you, but by you exactly.

You let go of me just a little bit, and whisper for now right before you kiss me. It gives me butterflies and an odd, warm sensation at the same time. The feel of your lips is so raw and warm and real, contrasting with the quickly cooling air around us, and before I'm used to it, it's over again.

"For later?" you ask, waiting for my invitation. I can't say anything, so I just meet you halfway and kiss you again. I feel almost giddy, beside myself with happiness, yet somehow quieted with shyness. How long have I wanted to kiss you? How long have I wanted to hold hands with you? How suddenly has this happened, and how lucky am I?

Unbelievably lucky to be liked by you.

"Okay..." you sigh and take my hand again. "Let's go."

As we near the exit to the park and the crowded streets of Seoul, you casually let go of my hand. And so, I think, begins a new age of secrecy for both of us

[Next Part] Chapter Four: Red

Polychromatic Us: Chapter Two

aidenrose — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 08:32:28 GMT

Title: Polychromatic Us
Part: Chapter Two: Yellow
Previous Parts: Chapter One
Genre: Romance
Pairing: Donghae/Eunhyuk
Rating: PG-13 (sensuality)
Word Count: 3,394
Synopsis: Colors have always been there in our relationship...from the day I met you. If I were to tell our story, I’d do it with a canvas and paint; vibrant colors of every shade and hue.
Next Update: ~~Saturday, October 10~~. Writer's block. (This date is not fixed. Please read my A/N about why! ^^)

Full A/N beneath the cut. ^^

Hey guys! I have something exciting to tell you all - I am 95% sure that I am going on vacation to Brazil for a month starting on October 16th! I'm really excited about it (and a little stressed because I have to apply to college, too. >>;). I don't yet know how much time I will be able too spend on writing (there are beaches everywhere! *w*), but I will have a laptop and internet access while I am there. Hopefully I'll be very inspired and will be able to write a lot of heartfelt stories.

I will try to post Kokoro no Taion chapter 2, Polychromatic Us chapter 3, and Forever chapter 3 before I go. If I can't, it's just because I'm too busy studying and preparing for the trip - but they will be posted as soon as possible. The Chronicles of Jaechul will continue to run normally. After those 3 are posted, I will probably not give any more dates for future updates until I know what it's like in Brazil. I'm sorry... ^^;

Please read and enjoy! ^^/

Yellow

I’m sitting in an afternoon sunbeam in an empty practice room, absorbing its warmth and relaxing. It feels good on my face, almost like a warm washcloth. Through my eyelashes all I can see is sparkling light reflecting off of the wooden floor like a sea of diamonds. It's almost blinding, like looking at the sun itself. I close my eyes, and through my eyelids it's still bright. I pull my hood down over my eyes and doze until I hear the click of the door, and you come in.

“Hey,” I say, sitting up.

“Hey you,” you say, smiling widely and shutting the door. You gracefully fall to your knees in front of me and look at me with excitement.

“What?” I laugh.

You make a face and then kiss my cheek. I blush hotly, surprised, and you laugh.

“Happy birthday." You sit down next to me. “You’re seventeen today.”

I nod, trying to forget how close your face was to mine, but I can still feel your lips against my cheek acutely.

“How are you today?”

"Fine," I say. "I'm going home to visit my family. They want to celebrate with me...even my sister is coming home, so...thanks for coming to see me."

"Of course." You casually throw your arm around my shoulders. "I wanted to see you on your birthday."

I just look at you and feel lucky to know you, who are so unafraid of friendship. Since you introduced yourself to me, and I introduced you to other people, you've quickly formed bonds with everyone. Everyone likes you. But you've never forgotten about me. I like you more and more, and even though sometimes it's painful for me, I'm happiest when I'm with you. You smile and I smile back.

"Did you get me anything?"

"Nope. It's just me."

"Really?" I tilt my head. "Oh well. I guess that's all I want, really."

"You want me?" Your tone is teasing, but your expression is serious. I blush and quickly say that that wasn't what I meant.

"Then why are you blushing?"

"I'm not."

"Yes you are," you laugh.

"It's embarrassing!"

"Why? It's not embarrassing to want a person. I wanted you on my birthday. And when I turn seventeen, you have to take time for me, too."

"Sure," I say. "If you want me there."

You laugh and say that I just made a promise. I don't challenge it - in my mind, I did promise, even though my words weren't of that nature.

"So you're going home," you say softly and lower your head onto my shoulder. You haven't taken your arm off of me, either. Lately you're like this - affectionate. I don't know what to think about it, and I'm caught between just letting myself enjoy your touch and wishing that you would stop so that I wouldn't be so confused. "How long will you be gone?"

"Just a day. I'll stay the night and then come home early in the morning."

"That's nice...that you can just leave for a day and see your parents."

"Mmm."

"I miss mine," you say quietly. "I really miss them."

My eyes had trailed to the sunlit floor, but something about your tone makes me look at you again. You always talk about your father, and how inspirational and supportive he's been. I want to meet him. This isn't the first time you've admitted to missing them.

Without giving it a second thought, I reach across you and hold your hand. Your fingers close around mine, and I suddenly realize what I'm doing. Won't you think that I'm weird? I want to rewind and take my hand back, but before I'm able to, you pull your hand out of mine and wipe your eyes.

"Oh, Donghae. Don't cry."

"I'm okay." You smile reassuringly. "Sorry."

"It's okay," I reply. I don't mind your tears except that I wish I could that make them go away. I watch as you stand up and open all the blinds, letting in as much sunlight as possible.

"When do you need to go?" you ask, turning around and smiling again.

I glance at my watch. "An hour or so, I guess."

"An hour...not very long."

I shake my head. Morning classes kept us apart until now. It isn't very long, and I wish it were longer.

"What shall we do?" you ask, sitting down next to me again and pouting with your chin in your hands. "We can go out, since you have to go to the station anyway."

"The station..." I say softly. You nod. It isn't that far to my city. There actually isn't any reason that you couldn't go with me past the station. "Are you free tonight?"

"Yeah. I made sure just in case you didn't have any plans for today."

"You're so nice," I say, laughing quietly. I'm always amazed by how kind you are. "Do you want to come with me?"

You bite your lip. "Can I?"

"I have to call my mom and ask, but it should be okay." I smile and you grin and nod enthusiastically. I take out my cellphone and call home. You move your head closer to mine so that you can hear, and before I can tell you not to eavesdrop, my mom picks up.

"Hey, Mom."

"Oh, Hyukjae! Happy Birthday!"

"Thanks," I say, smiling at the sound of her voice congratulating me. "Hey, would it be okay if one of my best friends came home with me?"

"Who? Junsu?"

"No, Lee Donghae."

"Oh! The one you're always talking about." I blush and inch away from you as you cover your mouth with your hands and laugh silently. I catch your eye and start to laugh too, and I almost miss my mother saying that it's okay.

"Thanks," I say, straightening my face. "I'll see you soon, then, okay?"

"Alright. Be careful on your way home."

"Bye."

I put my phone away and you clear your throat. "You talk about me all the time?"

"My mom exaggerates."

"Your face says that you do."

I quietly deny it. I'm really trying my hardest to stop blushing, but I'm too embarrassed. You poke my cheek. "It's okay, I talk about you too."

"Stop." I laugh uncomfortably.

"But I really do."

"Really?"

You nod. I can't help but smile, and you smile at me with amusement. "So I get to come over, huh? Good. I want to see your room."

"My room? Why?"

"So I can see your stuff, of course." You stand up and pull me to my feet. "I'm curious."

"Okay," I say weakly. I'm repeatedly flattered by how interested you are in me. But I'm no less interested in you - I want to see where you've lived, too. I want to know how you decorate your space and what your home feels like.

"Junsu is your best friend, isn't he?" you ask suddenly.

"Since I was a kid."

"Long time...you must have gone to the same schools."

"Yeah. We go to the same school now, too. You didn't notice that we come in together a lot?"

"I noticed...That's nice, spending so much time with your best friend."

I nod slowly. "He's inspiring, I guess. We used to practice together every day before we auditioned."

You look away, smiling. Somehow I think you look sad, and after a few seconds I gently turn your face towards me.

"You okay?" I ask, tilting my head and looking at you searchingly.

"I'm a little jealous," you admit after a moment and look at me apologetically. You're jealous? You wince as if you're expecting me to condemn you for it.

"Don't be." I hug you before I know what I'm doing. You're jealous of my relationship with Junsu. What do I think about that? "You're special."

I'm somehow not surprised to find your arms around me. I'm in no rush to release you, and it seems like you aren't either. But after a minute, I involuntarily think of your body and become too self conscious. I don't want you to be able to feel how quickly my heart is beating, so I let go of you.

You're blushing. It takes me a second to realize it, but you are. It can't be for the reason that I want it to be. It just can't be.

"C'mon," I say quietly, turning away and opening the door quickly. "We need to get your stuff."

"What does your sister do?" you ask, breaking the silence on the train heading towards my home city.

"She's in college."

"Do you want to go to college, too?"

"Yeah." I sigh. "You?"

"I suppose. I think so. Yes."

I laugh. "I just want to go and learn something, I guess."

"I understand." You smile. "I'm excited to meet your family."

"I hope you like them."

We keep up the conversation this way until the awkwardness wears off, and then we're talking normally again. When we arrive, you start expressing curiosity about the city, and I laugh and tell you that it's an ordinary place, but you say that it isn't because it's where I used to live. We ride a bus for a few stops, and when we get off you look around with interest.

"So this is your town..."

"Yup."

"Where's your house?"

"This way. We have to walk for a while."

You take a few quick steps to catch up with me, and we walk to my house. You ask about my neighborhood the entire way. You stop outisde of my house and look at it, and I feel self conscious and tell you that it's nothing special, but you say that you like it. We walk up the steps, I unlock the door, and we go inside.

"I'm home," I call, and my sister comes around the corner and hugs me, gushing birthday congratulations and inquiries about how I'm doing. I'm old enough now that I can hug her without feeling embarrassed. We let go of each other, and I motion to you.

"This is my friend, Lee Donghae." My sister beams and you bow, introducing yourself again. She tells you that she's delighted to meet you, and I smile and take off my shoes. You follow suit, and we walk into the kitchen, where my mother is. On the way, you look at everything, taking in as much as you can.

My mother welcomes me home affectionately, purring over her beloved son. She catches sight of you, and I can tell that she likes you instantly because her face lights up into a genuine smile. You bow respectfully and introduce yourself. My mother ushers you in and asks us if we're hungry.

"We won't eat dinner until your father comes home in an hour. Can you wait?"

"Yeah, no problem," I say. "I'm gonna put my stuff upstairs." I look at you, inviting you to come upstairs silently. You look at the pictures on the walls as we walk upstairs and into my room. I close the door behind us and drop my bag down next to my bed.

You're standing still, just looking from one thing to the next with open curiosity. You catch me looking at you and you smile - it breaks your immobility and you put your things down. I sit down on my bed and continue watching you as walk over to my desk.

"So this is where you studied..." You sit down at it and spin around in the chair twice. Your eyes pass over my walls; posters of H.O.T. and random stuff cover them. I laugh and admit that I didn't study enough at that desk. I was too busy practicing dancing. You pick up a photograph and smile at it.

"This is you as a baby?"

"Yes."

"You were cute."

"Thanks." You look at me and we both laugh over the short exchange, and you put it back and sit down next to me.

"I like your room. It's so clean."

"Thank you."

"Your family is nice."

"They're okay." I smile. "They like you."

"Good," you say softly, leaning your head back and looking out of my window. "I want to be liked by them."

"If I like you, they'll like you. If I love you, they'll love you."

"Do you love me?"

"What a weird thing to ask." I laugh, but you don't. Do I love you? I don't know if I do or not. I like you a lot. There's nothing stopping me from loving you...it's just that I haven't known you long enough to say that I do. Or maybe I just don't even know what love is yet.

"Yeah, I guess it is. I guess boys don't..." you trail off, and I wonder what you were going to say. You pick a photograph off of my nightstand and look at it. I wonder if you're embarrassed, or if you've simply moved on already.

"Is this your father?" you ask, pointing at him in the picture. It's a nice photo of my family from when I was little.

"Yeah." I smile. "He looks a lot older now, though."

"How old were you?"

"Five."

You nod slowly. "You look nice together. You, your sister, your mother, and you father. Complete, you know? Happy. You look a lot like your mom..."

I admit that it's true, and you smile at me and put the photograph back. "You were born in a good month."

"More than any other?"

"April is pretty. Don't you like cherry blossoms?"

I tell you that I do like them. We talk for a few more minutes until I suggest that we go back downstairs, and you agree that we should go. My mother and sister are genuinely curious about you, and they include you in all of our conversations. If they didn't, then I would, but it's nice not having to work to have you be a part of things. My mother and sister start cooking dinner, leaving us alone in the living room, and you turn towards me and talk with me again while they're busy.

My father arrives, and I reunite quickly with him as he steps in through the door. Like the rest of my family, he's pleased to meet you. You get along well with my family - but you get along with everyone, really. We eat dinner together, and it's a cheerful event; we talk and laugh a lot. I'm really happy to be together with my family and you today. I'm glad that I had the courage to ask you to come back with me.

Afterward my sister helps my mother clean up, and I talk with my father and you. My father takes the opportunity to ask me about school and training, and I supply him with an update. Only now that I'm not living here do I miss having my family there every day, always wanting to know how I am and what I'm doing.

My mother turns out the light and presents me with my birthday cake; a yellow cake layered and topped with strawberries and seventeen candles. My face splits into a huge smile as they sing me happy birthday. I can't help but notice that your voice is pretty. I like hearing you sing to me. I look at the candle flames, shimmering happily in the dim light. What should I wish for?

The answer is obvious.

I wish that you like me.

I blow out all of the candles in one breath. Supposedly that means that it will come true, but I realized as a child that wishes often don't. It's just a traditional form of hoping.

The lights come back on, and you and my parents clap as my sister hugs me and squeals over how old her baby brother is getting. My mother gets the camera and sets it on the countertop facing us. You try to move away as she sets it up for a photo, but I pull you back, and my family chides you, telling you that you're my friend and will absolutely take a photo with us.

You and my family gather around me and smile at the camera, anticipating the flash. You lean in and put an arm around my neck and throw up the peace sign. I smile helplessly at the camera and enjoy myself. The flash goes off, and we relax. My mother cuts the cake and gives me the first slice. I've always loved strawberries, and strawberry cake is my favorite kind of cake.

An hour later, my sister says that she has to leave and get back to her college. She hugs us goodbye and hands me a small wrapped gift before she goes. I thank her, and she wishes me a happy year. She says she'll call me and my parents tell her to be safe on her way home. My mother turns to us after she's gone and tells us to go to bed because we have to get up early to return to Seoul. She offers you the guest bedroom, and you accept it.

I show you where the guest room is, and then we go back to my room to get your things. You shut the door behind you and lean against it.

"Are you really going to sleep now?" you ask.

I shrug and sit down on my bed, holding my sister's present in my hands. "Yeah."

"When are we waking up?"

"Six or so."

"So early..." you wince. "Ah, well. I guess we have to sleep, then."

"Unfortunately." You pick up your backpack and stand in front of me. I look up at you, and you meet my eyes, an expression on your face that I can't quite place.

"How do you feel?" you ask. "Do you feel different?"

"Not really," I admit. "I think I stopped feeling a difference when I turned fourteen..."

"Yeah, I guess the more birthdays you have, the less special they are." You nod slowly. "Your parents...do they have gifts for you?"

I smile. "They'll give them to me later. They didn't want to in front of a guest."

"You should open that," you say, nodding at the present from my sister. "Do you mind? I want to see what she got you."

I hope that it isn't something embarrassing and open part of the wrapping. I think sometimes you influence me too much. I find your suggestions too easy to follow, even when they make me uncomfortable. I can't help it - I just want to please you. I don't want to disappoint you.

"A CD?"

I nod and look at the cover art. It's a foreign CD - Parachutes by Coldplay. You lean forward and look at it with me. You turn the CD over in my hands and I blush a little as your fingers touch mine.

"Yellow," you say softly, picking the song title that you most immediately recognize and understand. "She likes English music?"

"I guess so. That's nice of her." I put the CD down on my nightstand. "I'll take it back with me and listen to it."

"If it's good, can I borrow it sometime?"

"No problem." I smile.

"Thanks." You're lingering as if you're reluctant to go. As I'm thinking of saying good night, you raise your hand and touch my cheek, your fingers gentle and light against it. You open your mouth with a small, sharp intake of breath as if you're going to say something, but you bite your lip instead. You cup the side of my face for a second, and then your hand drops.

"Happy seventeenth birthday, Hyukjae!" you say quietly, your voice tense and almost embarrassed. You quickly turn and leave, leaving me blushing and staring at the door after you're gone.

What was that?

What were you going to say?

I can't believe how fast my heart is pounding. I touch my cheek where you touched it, and the skin feels hot to me. My god. I put my hand over my heart gingerly. My pace won't slow down at all. I quickly turn off the light and climb into bed and hug myself, curling into a ball. I almost feel like crying. I want to hide.

Do you like me, or are you just affectionate?

[Next Part] Chapter Three: Blue

Polychromatic Us: Chapter One

aidenrose — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 08:27:40 GMT

Title: Polychromatic Us
Part: Chapter One: White
Genre: Romance
Pairing: Donghae/Eunhyuk
Rating: PG-13 (sensuality)
Word Count: 2,214
Synopsis: Colors have always been there in our relationship...from the day I met you. If I were to tell our story, I’d do it with a canvas and paint; vibrant colors of every shade and hue.
Next Update: Saturday, September 26th.

Phew! @w@; now all of my series have begun. This is my first time writing a 2nd-person POV story...so far I like it. ^^ The idea for a color-themed series arose while I was writing down one-shot prompts many weeks ago, and so far I'm having a lot of fun with it. Please read and enjoy!! ^ ^ /

(Written from Eunhyuk's perspective.)

White

You're wearing white again. It looks good on you. I can't possibly tell you that, though, because I haven't even properly met you yet. The simple reason for that being that you're new, and no one has really gotten to know you yet. I want to introduce myself, but...I'm shy. Every time I get close to having the confidence to talk to you, I falter. I just like you, and for now, I'm okay with liking you from afar without knowing anything about you.

So, like most days, I sit down against the back wall and play with my cellphone until my friends get here. Dance practice. My favorite class at SM Entertainment, hands down. I like singing and acting, but I'm not as good at them - and what person doesn't like what he's best at the most? Anyway, I just like dancing. I've always liked it.

My eyes keep straying to you without my permission and I end up just pretending to be busy with my phone. I haven't seen you dance yet, but you must be good if you're in my class. I want you to be good - if you are, then we have something in common. I'm hoping that I'll get to see what you can do today.

I decide to save the battery on my phone and put it away. The other trainees are talking amongst themselves, but I don't care enough to listen to what they're talking about. Some of them I know, some of them I don't. I cross my arms over my chest and yawn, and look around the room. It's white and clean. Everyday, the dirt tracked in from shoes, the sweat, the tears...all of it gets mopped up by someone.

I steal another glance at you, and my heart skips a beat. You were looking at me. I quickly lower my face so you won't see that I'm blushing. My cheeks are positively burning, and I wish they'd stop. I wish I weren't so nervous when I want you to notice me. After a few seconds, I can't help myself, and I look at you again to see if you're still looking my way. You are. Our eyes meet, and you make a motion as if you want to walk towards me, and I look away again.

I almost want to get up and leave the room, but thankfully, I don't have to. Sungmin arrives, like a blessing - someone to distract me from you. As I wave him over and he walks towards me, smiling, I wonder if I think too highly of myself. The chances of you...Anyway, we don't know each other. So maybe you're just looking at everyone curiously. You were just looking at me as you'd look at anyone.

"Hey," Sungmin says, sitting down next to me and smiling. "You okay?"

"Yeah. Why?"

"You look like your inner soul is in turmoil," he says laughingly. "Tough day at school or something?"

"Yes," I lie.

"You should do your homework now," he says, pulling his hat down over his eyes and smiling smugly. "We still have like ten minutes before we start."

"Nah, no interest." I yawn. "What to do?"

"Sleep," he says confidently and uses my shoulder as a pillow. I don't really care, except that I was hoping he'd talk to me and keep my mind off of you. But no. With his head lowered, I can see you again. The only thing I know about you is your name. That's it. I tear my gaze away and close my eyes.

I've known that I like boys since middle school, and I've had crushes before. I just wish that I knew a better way of dealing with them than this...but you probably wouldn't feel the same way, and that's what really keeps me away. The chances of you liking boys are slim. I don't know if I have the confidence to be your friend, which is why I shouldn't talk to you until my feelings dies down a little. Because they have to, I tell myself.

The rest of the trainees and our instructors arrive, and we get to work. Another intense session of dancing and learning ahead of us. When you walk into the group, I smile, because I know I'll see you dance today.

You...can dance. You can dance really well. I'm so happy about it that I almost complimented you after practice, but couldn't find a way to do it without feeling like I was standing out. Instead, I just headed into the changing rooms like normal. A changing room full of boys is not the easiest place for me to be in, but it's not as if I like everyone I see. I don't think anyone even knows that I like boys.

I find a shower that's empty, and drop my bag outside of it. I turn on the water and lazily strip off my shirt while I wait for the water to get to the right temperature. What I need is to shower and go home and be alone for a while.

"Hey."

I turn around automatically, and I almost fall backwards in surprise. It's you. You're looking directly at me and I blush. I feel like I'm in one of those dreams where you're exposed in a crowd, where everyone is looking at you, and there is nowhere to hide. I wish, perhaps more desperately than at any other time in my life, that I was not the sort of person who blushed. Say something.

"Hi," I manage. I also wish that I had waited just ten seconds more before taking off my shirt. It only increases my feeling of exposure that I'm shirtless in front of you the first time we meet. Why must you talk to me here, now, anyway?

"Sorry, bad time?"

"No, it's okay."

You smile again, and I tell my heart to stop beating so quickly. "You're Lee Hyukjae, right?"

"Yes."

"I'm Lee Donghae."

"I know," I say breathlessly. "You're one of the new trainees."

"Yeah," you say, biting your lip cutely. "You dance awesomely."

"Thank you," I say, leaning against the wall as subtly as I can for support. "You...You do too."

"Not like you...really, very cool. Anyway, I just wanted to introduce myself to you. Maybe we can be friends." You smile. Your smile is pretty, and it certainly isn't making this any easier for me.

"Ab...Absolutely." I try my hardest to smile back.

"Okay, cool." You linger for a second more. "Would you...Do you want to keep practicing?"

"What, you mean together?"

"Yeah. I mean, unless you have somewhere you need to be, or something."

"No," I say a little too quickly. "Let's practice."

You grin. "Okay. Turn off the water, then. I'll meet you outside, okay?"

"Okay." You nod and leave. When you're gone, I stare into space for a few seconds. I said I'd practice with you just now, didn't I? Damn it. I turn off the water and pull my t-shirt back on quickly. I sling my bag over my shoulder and splash my face with cold water from one of the sinks. I have to get a grip on myself quickly.

I dry my face off with my towel and tell myself to not let my thoughts stray. I have to treat you like anyone else. I can't treat you like you're my crush - even though you are. I don't want you to know that.

Okay. Okay, okay, okay. Just walk out and be normal.

"Hey," you say again, greeting me with a smile as I turn the corner out into the hallway. "How old are you?"

"I'm sixteen," I say, trying to keep the shyness out of my voice.

"I'm fifteen," you say, your face falling a little. "What year were you born in?"

"1986."

"Oh! So we are the same age. My birthday's in October."

"April," I say, finding myself smiling a little. I start walking back towards the practice rooms and you fall into step beside me.

"April," you repeat. "So your stone is a diamond."

 “Huh?”  

“Your birthstone. It’s a diamond, right?” 

My step slows and I look at you in mild surprise, wondering why you know that. "Yeah," I say slowly. "It is, I guess. But I don't really like white..."

I close my eyes for a fraction of a second and internally smack myself as soon as I say it. I like white on you. But you don't seem to read anything into it. You have no reason to.

“Diamonds aren’t always white,” you say, walking past me towards a soda machine. “Diamonds come in all different colors.” 

“Really?”

“Yeah,” you say, buying yourself a bottle of water. “Every color, pretty much. The popular ones aren’t really even white, though, they’re transparent, aren’t they?”

“I guess…”

“What color do you like?”

You walk towards me, drinking your water. I'm caught between watching you drink and looking away. And I don’t know what color I like. I like a lot of colors.

“I don’t really have a favorite,” I end up saying, looking at you with unfortunate shyness.

 “Oh,” you say, and bite the rim of your bottle. “What do you like?”

“I like a lot of things...I like dancing." 

“Me too.” You smile. “Let's choreograph something." 

“Really?" 

“Yeah, why not?” you say. “Let's go. And if you dance with me, you’ll loosen up, right?”

 I blush. “Probably,” I admit.

 “Ah, so you know how stiff you are.”

“I’m shy.” 

“But you’ll get used to me, won’t you?” 

“Yes,” I say, smiling a little. I hope that it isn't a lie. “I’m sorry I’m like this.”

“Don’t be - I like you.”

  "What? Why?" I say, blushing furiously. Why must you say that?

You shrug. “Dunno. Just do.” 

You just do. I open the door to a practice room and turn on the switch. I have to say something back, but what the hell do I say? I feel like a little kid, completely incompetent and socially inept. I should just tell you the simple truth. You won't think anything about it at all. I drop my bag down next a wall and manage a smile.

"I like you, too," I say, inwardly wincing at my tone. I kneel down next to my bag and open it, reaching in to take out CDs, and glance at you - or I meant to, but I just end up looking at you. You're smiling. It occurs to me I probably made you happy by telling you that.

"Okay," you say, kneeling down quickly and shaking my hand. Your hand is soft. "Let's do our best together!"

I nod, and we put in a few CDs, listening to tracks until we find one that we want work with. Sitting against the wall and just listening to music with you sitting next to me, I'm slowly getting a little more used to you. We like the same music. I'm actually smiling naturally as we stand up with our selected song and start experimenting. I can actually laugh with you.

I'm having fun. Time passes without me noticing it until I suddenly realize that it’s been dark outside for a while. I look at the clock above the door and I’m stunned. It’s been hours. I drink some water and catch my breath, surprised by how tired I am. I laugh and wipe my forehead with my towel. You express amazement at the time, too.

“We better leave soon,” I say. “It's getting late.” I sit down against the wall again and sling my towel around my neck. I’m positively dripping with sweat.

“That was fun,” you say, grinning at me. I smile back and agree. It's suddenly so easy for me to do that. I guess I'm just too exhausted to feel embarrassed anymore. I don't even blink as you sit down next to me.

"Where are you from?" I ask, feeling more adventurous.

"Mokpo," you answer, covering your head with your towel and grimacing slightly.

"That's pretty far."

“Mm.” You pause and look down at your hands. "I'm glad that..."

"Glad that...?"

"Nothing. I'm glad we're friends," you say, smiling hesitantly at me. 

"Me too." I smile and stand up. We are friends now, I realize. I have other friends here that I’ve known for a lot longer, including my best friend since childhood, but something tells me that you’re going to become one of my closest friends, even if I'd rather be your boyfriend. I'll hide that fact if it means we can become best friends. I like you that much. You follow me out as far as the showers, which is where we part ways.

"I'll see you tomorrow, right?"

"Yeah. I'll see you then."

Tomorrow I'll introduce you to my friends. Something tells me that you would really like some. I like you enough that I want you to have a lot of friends. Even when I'm back in my dorm room, even hours later, even days later, I'll still be thinking about you. No, I'll probably be thinking about you longer than that. But that far in the future is still just a blank white sheet of paper.

[Next Part] Chapter Two: Yellow

Happy Days; With You: Chapter Eleven

aidenrose — Tue, 23 Mar 2010 07:33:51 GMT

Title: Happy Days; With You
Part: Chapter Eleven: With You (Final Chapter)
Previous Parts: Prologue, Chapter One, Chapter Two, Chapter Three, Chapter Four, Chapter Five, Chapter Six, Chapter Seven, Chapter Eight, Chapter Nine, Chapter Ten
Genre: Romance
Pairing: Eunhyuk/Donghae, some Yesung/Ryeowook, Henry/Ryeowook.
Rating: PG-13 (sensuality)
Word Count: 2,495
Synopsis: Donghae returns from China and comes to realize his true feelings towards Eunhyuk in a relationship that transcends friendship.

Full A/N under the cut (it's long).

Well, the time has come for this series to end. I'm sad to end it, but this...is where it ends. TT_TT Thank you so much to everyone who read this fic, and especially to those of you who commented on it - I appreciate each and every comment. They encouraged me throughout the writing process, and I'm extremely grateful to you. This was my first series to write and complete, and I'm really thankful to you for making it such a good experience for me. I LOVE ALL OF YOU!!! ♥ Hehe! ^^

Now that Happy Days; With You has come to a close, I want to announce my next projects. ^^ As Eeteuk likes to say, It's not an End, it's an And. I've always enjoyed writing, and writing fan fiction has definitely become my favorite hobby. So:

★Polychromatic Us (HaeHyuk), beginning on Saturday, September 12th.
★Bubblegum Heaven (KyuMin), no specific start date yet.
★Forever (secret!pairing) with tvxqsocks , beginning on Sunday, September 6th.
✭NINJA!EDIT: Kokoro no Taion (EunHae), beginning on Tuesday, September 1st.
(We do have a master list, in case you didn't know, where everything is very well organized and easy to find. ♥ )

Also....It's kind of embarrassing to say this, but when I finish Polychromatic Us and Bubblegum Heaven, I'm going to compile them with Happy Days; With You and a bunch of one-shots into a book for myself, and I will make it available to you at the same time in case any of you might want a hard copy. ^^;;;;

In total, Happy Days; With You is 37,722 words long. @_@ And with that, please enjoy the final chapter of Happy Days; With You (feels more like an epilogue to me...)...and I hope that you'll read my new series, too. ^////^

P.S. I am forever grateful for the support of tvxqsocks . ;w; ily.

With You

Donghae woke up as soon as he entered the room; he had been sleeping lightly, waiting for him to come back. He turned over onto his back as Eunhyuk got in bed next to him and kissed him fully, sliding his hand under his shirt and up his chest. His first greeting. When the kiss ended, Donghae laughed and ran his hand through Eunhyuk’s damp hair, inhaling the faint fragrance of shampoo.

“Hey,” Eunhyuk said softly, somehow fitting I missed you, I longed for you, I’m glad to see you and I love you into a single word. His second greeting.

 “Hey.” Donghae smiled. He pulled a strand of Eunhyuk’s hair down over his eyes and Eunhyuk kissed him again. “What time is it?” 

“Late,” Eunhyuk said and turned onto his side, keeping his arm around Donghae’s waist and lightly stroking his skin with his fingertips. “After two. Did you listen tonight, too?”

“Yeah,” Donghae said. “I didn’t fall asleep that long ago.”

“Is it weird hearing me talk on the radio?” 

“No,” Donghae said, shaking his head. “It’s nice.”

Even in the dark room, he could see Eunhyuk smile, and he smiled too. He put an arm around Eunhyuk’s neck and sighed happily, as comfortable as he could be in his lover’s arms.

“I’m glad you’re home,” he said, moving his body closer to Eunhyuk’s. They looked at each other and Eunhyuk’s eyes told him that he was happy to be home. That he treasured this time with him.

“Don’t ever lose that,” Donghae whispered, kissing him.

“Lose what?” 

“That look in your eyes that says ‘I love you.’”

Eunhyuk laughed softly. “I’ve been in love with you for seven years, and I’ve never been more in love with you. Rest assured.”

Donghae kissed him, moving until the only space between them was their clothing. “You’re so sweet.”

“That’s what I think about you,” Eunhyuk laughed, adjusting himself until he found a place where he was really comfortable. Donghae smiled as Eunhyuk smoothed out his shirt across his back and wrapped his arms around him again.

 “Sleep now?” Donghae asked, kissing his jaw slowly.

“Mhmm,” Eunhyuk said, stroking his back. “Tomorrow’s a day off. Aren’t you happy? We can sleep in and spend all day together.” 

“I’m overjoyed. They’re so rare.” He yawned.

“I know,” Eunhyuk breathed, his hand slowing. “Night…”

“Good night.” Donghae kissed his neck for a final time and closed his eyes, his head nestled in beside Eunhyuk’s. Immediately, sleep overcame him like a heavy, peaceful blanket thrown over them.

Donghae opened his eyes and blinked slowly in the bright sunlight. Hello, morning. Sometime during the night he’d turned over so that he was facing away from Eunhyuk, lying along the contours of his body perfectly, like he was made to fit there. Eunhyuk was still asleep, his arm lazily thrown over him.

He carefully turned over and lightly brushed Eunhyuk’s face with his hand, softly lit by the morning light. He smiled, admiring how beautiful his skin was. He wanted to wake him up, but he was in no real rush to. He knew he was tired, and today they had all day. All day to be with him. All of my life to be with him.

“With you,” he whispered, looking at Eunhyuk’s sleeping face with love. He glanced over his shoulder at the clock; it was almost noon. He’ll wake up soon, he thought, smiling. All he had to do was wait, and he did so, by watching him sleep and resisting kissing him. All of my life...except...he sighed and turned his face into the pillow. Except for China.

He only had two weeks until he had to leave again - albeit for a short amount of time - to restart promotions for Super Junior-M. He didn’t to go. He didn’t want to sleep without him, to not see his face everyday. And talking on the phone wasn’t the same thing as whispering intimately in the dark.

Eunhyuk stirred and Donghae turned his face slightly and looked at him with one eye, pulled out of his thoughts by the possibility of Eunhyuk waking up. Eunhyuk rubbed his eyes, yawned, and then looked at him blearily for a second. Donghae smiled and watched as Eunhyuk rolled onto his back and closed his eyes again.

“Good morning,” Donghae said, lying on his stomach and inching closer to him. “You awake?”

“Sleep,” he said softly, merely shaping the word as he exhaled. Donghae laughed and kissed him, making it impossible for him to go back to sleep.

“It’s noon. Wake up!” 

“No,” Eunhyuk moaned as Donghae covered his face with kisses. “I don’t want to get up yet.” 

“I didn’t say get up,” Donghae said. “I said wake up.” 

“Same thing,” Eunhyuk said, giving in and kissing him.

“No,” Donghae said, looking into Eunhyuk’s open eyes laughingly. “This is waking up.”

Eunhyuk sighed and drew him down into a kiss, wrapping his arms around him. Donghae kissed him, feeling like his heart was breaking a little even though joy flooded through him. He kissed him more desperately for a second and then broke off, sitting up and quickly wiping away two tears.

“Donghae?” 

That voice. He closed his eyes and let it echo in his head. Full of concern and surprise.

“Are you okay?” Eunhyuk said, sitting up with him and rubbing his shoulders. Donghae nodded. Eunhyuk tugged on him lightly and Donghae turned and threw his arms around his neck.

“I woke up and thought about China,” Donghae said quietly, reluctantly. “I don’t want to go.” 

“It’s only a week and a half,” Eunhyuk said softly, stroking his head slowly.

 “Right?” Donghae almost laughed. “It’s just a blink of an eye, but...it hurts.”

Eunhyuk pulled him back down and held him closely, comfortingly. “It does. It hurts.”

“I’ve gotten used to you, the past few months,” Donghae said. “Gotten used to this.”  

“That’s good; you should.” 

“I’ll miss this,” Donghae whispered, wiping his eyes again. “I’ll miss you.” 

“Of course; I’ll miss you, too. It’ll be easier for you, since you’re the one going away.” 

“We’ll both be busy.” 

“But you won’t have this empty apartment to come home to,” he said, taking his hand and kissing his palm. Donghae fell silent and they looked at each other.

“Maybe you could move back into the dorms,” Donghae suggested quietly.

“Maybe,” Eunhyuk said, smiling softly at him. “But anyway, you don’t have to leave for another two weeks. Don’t miss me yet.” 

“Sorry,” Donghae smiled. “I didn’t expect to feel like this. And I have to...go back there for longer periods of time later, and more frequently.” 

Eunhyuk kissed his forehead. “It’ll be okay. It’s just a temporary thing. Just a business trip.” 

“It’s funny, isn’t it? Just a little thing, and not even a bad thing, but I don’t want to part from you so much that I’m crying weeks before I have to go.”

“It’s love,” Eunhyuk said softly. “I don’t want you to go either.”

“Yeah,” Donghae sighed. “But I have to.” 

“I know.” Eunhyuk laughed. “I know that.”

“I’ll always, always come back to you,” Donghae said, laying his hand against Eunhyuk’s cheek. Eunhyuk smiled; the kind of smile that says I love you more genuinely than any utterance of affection.

“I’ll always wait for you.” 

Donghae kissed him, putting all of his emotion and affection into it, until Eunhyuk’s body subtly told him to stop, and Eunhyuk looked at him, running his fingers through his hair slowly.

“Donghae,” he said. “I want you to write me a love letter.”

Donghae looked at him breathlessly for a few seconds. “Why?” he finally managed. “I can tell you anytime that I love you.”  

“I want something I can keep. Something that lasts longer than a phone call.” 

“Okay,” Donghae said. “Then write me one, too.” 

Eunhyuk blushed and hid his face against the pillow. Donghae laughed and kissed the back of his head. “Are you embarrassed?”

Eunhyuk nodded and Donghae laughed again. “What’s there to be embarrassed about?” 

“Nothing,” Eunhyuk said, turning over and looking at him. “I’ll write you one.” 

Donghae kissed him. “People used to write them all the time.”

“I know...I think it’s nice.” 

“Do you?”

Eunhyuk nodded and they smiled at each other. Donghae sat up and drew him out of bed, pulling him into the living room by both hands. He knelt down in front of the table and tore out of page from one of his notebooks. Uncapping a pen, he glanced up at Eunhyuk.

“You don’t care what I write it on, do you? It’s the words that count, right?”

“Right,” Eunhyuk said quietly, sitting down behind him and wrapped his arms around his middle. He rested his head against Donghae’s shoulder and closed his eyes as Donghae started to write. “Thank you.”

“I want mine before I leave.” 

“Okay,” he said and kissed his shoulder. “I promise to write one before then.”

“Good.” Donghae smiled.

He continued writing without hardly a pause until, almost imperceptibly, Eunhyuk sniffed. He looked up from the paper and his hand stilled. Eunhyuk’s arms tightened around him and he put the pen down. “Are you crying?” 

“A little bit,” Eunhyuk admitted and then laughed. “I’m really touched.”  

Donghae laughed softly. “If you wanted me to write fifty letters, I’d do it. Ask, and I’ll do it. If it makes you happy, I’ll do it.”

“Stop,” Eunhyuk moaned. “You make me really happy.”

“Why should I stop?” Donghae said, laughing. “I’m yours. Why shouldn’t I say as much as I can to make you feel loved?”

“Fine,” Eunhyuk said, lifting his head from his shoulder and kissing his neck. “I love it. Finish writing.”

“Hyukjae,” Donghae said patiently. “You’re distracting me now.”

 “Don’t you think you can write a better love letter when I’m kissing you?”

  “All I can think about is how your lips feel.”

Eunhyuk laughed. “Good?”

  “As if you don’t know that,” Donghae moaned. “Go make toast or something.” He lightly shrugged him off, and Eunhyuk laughed and stood up.

“Okay.”

Donghae watched him through his fingers for a few seconds. Eunhyuk kept smiling at him, and it made it hard for him to tear his gaze away and start writing again. He was surprised by how easy it was. He really could write fifty, if he wanted to.

“Are you almost done?” Eunhyuk asked, putting a plate of buttered toast down on the table and pushing a glass of orange juice across it towards him.

“Yeah.”

Eunhyuk looked at his cellphone and took a bite of toast. He stared at it for a few seconds and then put it down as Donghae folded the paper neatly. Donghae looked up, smiled, and motioned Eunhyuk over.

He moved to Donghae’s side of the table and he offered him the letter. “Don’t open it until after I leave for China.”

  “Thank you,” Eunhyuk said, taking it from him. Donghae wouldn’t let go of it at first and they laughed.

“You’re welcome,” Donghae smiled. “I love you.” 

“I love you, too,” Eunhyuk whispered and kissed the letter. He moved back to where he was sitting as Donghae bit into a slice of toast. He watched as Eunhyuk looked at his phone again and put his chin on the table, pouting cutely.

“Get something interesting?”

“I missed a call from my mother.”

“When? This morning? That’s okay, she knows you sleep in late.”

“Yeah.” Eunhyuk nodded slowly and they looked at each other. Donghae raised his eyebrows slightly and Eunhyuk sighed. “I haven’t told her that I’m living with you.”

  “I haven’t told my family either.”

  “It’d be awkward, right? I don’t want to lie to her, but I don’t know if...it’d…” he shrugged. “If it would make her happier to know that I’m gay or not.”

Donghae crossed his arms on the table and rested his head on them. “Wouldn’t you be worried, as a parent, that your child would be lonely? But you’re not. We’re happy. I kind of feel like, wouldn’t you be happy to know that your son is in love?” 

“You know it won’t be that simple, though. You left out the last bit - that your son is in love with a man.”  

Donghae sighed. “I know. I’ve been thinking about it. What if they ask? Do we lie?”  

“I don’t want either of us to have to lie.”  

“But will we?”  

Eunhyuk bit his lip. “I kind of want to tell them. Our families.”

Donghae nodded. “I kind of want to, too.”

  “Maybe someday, when it feels right to.” 

Donghae smiled and nodded again, eating another piece of toast.

Eunhyuk laughed suddenly and smiled at him. “You want proof that I’m really happy?”  

“You mean, besides the daily proof that I already have?”  

“Yes.”

  “Sure.”

 Eunhyuk turned off his phone and set it down on the table. “Every time I talk to them, they tell me how happy I sound. ‘Eunhyukkie, you sound so healthy! What happened? Always so happy.’”

“What do you tell them?” Donghae smiled.

“That I’ve always been like that,” he said and laughed. Donghae laughed with him, and they talked about other things as they ate. Donghae left Eunhyuk to put the dishes into the sink and he stretched out in a sunbeam like a cat. Eunhyuk disappeared for a minute, putting the letter away somewhere and getting a hoodie.

It was almost summer again, but unfortunately, no rest would come to either of them during it. They were perhaps busier than ever, as their popularity increased. Free time was different now, too. It was time spent with each other, which in a way was freer than anything.

Eunhyuk laid down next to him and pulled his hood up over his eyes, blocking out the sunlight. Donghae linked his fingers with him and hid his face against Eunhyuk’s shoulder. He loved holding his hand; soft and reassuring in his. One of the simplest gestures between them, yet one of his favorite.

“Yah,” Eunhyuk said softly, “I’m glad we moved in together.”

  “God, yes,” Donghae laughed. “Nothing has made me as happy as this.”

“Nothing?” 

“Well...it’s a different kind of happiness than being accepted at an audition, than debuting, than achieving your dreams...than doing what I really love, isn’t it?” 

Eunhyuk nodded. “I think that this has made me happiest,” Donghae said quietly. “And the beautiful thing is, I don’t have to choose between you and those things. Things like Super Junior.” 

Eunhyuk sat up, bringing Donghae with him, and caressed his face in his hands. “This is what I wanted, since I was just a teenager. The thing I wanted the most was you. I love you, I love you, I love you.”

Donghae kissed him, affectionate and tender. 

“Hyukjae,” he said, smiling brilliantly at him. “These are my happy days with you.”

“How many days?”

“Forever.”

  “Forever with you…”

Happy Days; With You: Chapter Ten

aidenrose — Tue, 23 Mar 2010 07:27:56 GMT

Title: Happy Days; With You
Part: Chapter Ten: Better Than a Nightlight
Previous Parts: Prologue, Chapter One, Chapter Two, Chapter Three, Chapter Four, Chapter Five, Chapter Six, Chapter Seven, Chapter Eight, Chapter Nine
Genre: Romance
Pairing: Eunhyuk/Donghae, some Yesung/Ryeowook, Henry/Ryeowook.
Rating: PG-13 (sensuality)
Word Count: 4,104
Synopsis: Donghae returns from China and comes to realize his true feelings towards Eunhyuk in a relationship that transcends friendship.
Next Update: Saturday, August 22nd (barring no extreme writer's block. You know the deal.)

Sorry this is a little late again - this was a hard chapter to write. I hope you really enjoy it!! ^ ^ /

Thanks to my beta and bff tvxqsocks for her awesome awesome support and help. ♥

Better Than a Nightlight

Donghae taped another box of his things shut and sat down, taking a break from packing his belongings up. He looked around his room, which was growing steadily more empty. It felt odd. Even though he’d moved many times before, this time it was different. For obvious reasons, he thought.

He was past sadness by now; he was just excited. He laid down on his back next to his bed and stared at the ceiling. Tomorrow. Tomorrow he’d live with Eunhyuk, just the two of them. Complete privacy to be themselves with each other, without thinking about their surroundings or who might see them together. A place of complete acceptance and trust and freedom.

And, he thought, it would require a greater level of communication and cooperation between him and Eunhyuk, and he wanted to meet that challenge, small as it would be. He was as compatible with him as mint and chocolate. Complimentary beings. He was ready to commit himself to living with him.

“Hey,” a soft, high voice that he recognized as Ryeowook’s said from his door. He looked up and saw him hovering in the doorway. He rolled over onto his stomach and got on his knees.

“Hey,” he said. “What’s up?”  

Ryeowook smiled shyly. “Can I come in?”  

“You don’t have to ask,” Donghae said and smiled, sitting down on his bed and settling himself against the wall. He watched in mild curiosity as Ryeowook closed the door behind him. “Sit down.”

Ryeowook sat down next to him and look around the room. “Looks different without all of your stuff in here.”  

“Yeah,” Donghae said. “I wonder what they’ll do with the room.” 

“They’ll find a use for it. Maybe Manager-hyung will come upstairs…” 

“Doubtful,” Donghae laughed. “But you’re right. They’ll find a use. So...what’s up?”

  “Just wanted to talk,” he said and smiled. “You know, about stuff.”

“Talk away…” Donghae said, making himself comfortable. Ryeowook was silent for a long time, looking at the empty spaces in Donghae’s room, and Donghae patiently waited for him to speak.

“It’s about Yesung, I guess.” 

“I kind of expected that,” Donghae said and laughed. “What’s on your mind?”

“We’re over,” Ryeowook said and glanced at Donghae. “Really over.” 

“You okay?” Donghae said quietly.

“I just...think you did the right thing - telling everyone, I mean. I wonder if...we did what you’re doing, it would have worked out,” Ryeowook said, wiping his eyes and sniffing. “I wonder if hiding put too much strain on our relationship.”

“Don’t think about that now,” Donghae said. “No point.” 

“I know.” 

“You chose to be with Henry, didn’t you?” 

“No.” Donghae raised his eyebrows and Ryeowook looked at him tentatively. “I’m not going to be with either of them. It’s just a broken relationship with Yesung, and it’s torturing him to see me with Henry. It’s not that I don’t care about Yesung anymore...And anyway, I shouldn’t do this with someone I work with. It just creates problems. You’ll be fine, though! You and Hyukjae will definitely be okay,” he finished hurriedly.

“Ryeowook,” Donghae said, looking at him with concern. “Will that make you happy? Saying goodbye to both of them?”  

“There’s a saying that if you can’t choose one, you don’t love either of them,” Ryeowook said quietly. He was trying very hard not to cry, and it made Donghae’s heart hurt to see how much of an effort it was for him.

“But don’t you...want one of them?”  

Ryeowook shook his head. “It would be good for no one if I did.”

  “But…”

  “Hyung,” Ryeowook said, turning his head to look at him. He smiled sadly. “I’ve thought it through. This is what’s best.”

“Honestly...Look at how miserable you are,” Donghae said, wiping Ryeowook’s face with his sleeve. “I don’t want this for you.”

  “I just need time.” 

“That’s all?” Donghae looked at him carefully and Ryeowook nodded.

“That’s all,” he said and sighed, releasing some of his emotional stress. “It will be easier from now on. I’ll move into Hyukjae’s room, so we won’t be in each other’s face all the time. He’ll be okay, too…You know, even though...even though I really felt in love, maybe it wasn’t love at all. Honestly, that’s...that’s what I’d like to think now.”

Donghae sighed and put an arm around his shoulders, ready to wait as long as Ryeowook needed to stop crying. Ryeowook smiled at him briefly.

“Sorry,” he said, wiping his eyes. “I feel like I’m always coming to you to cry about stuff.” 

“It’s okay,” Donghae said. “I don’t mind.”

“You really don’t?”

  “I really don’t.” Donghae laughed. “I think you’re being mature about this.”

  Ryeowook sighed. “About time, right?”

  “Right.” Donghae patted his shoulder. “After I’m gone, If you need me, you know you can call me, right?”

Ryeowook nodded. “It’s okay. I’ll leave you two alone unless I really need you. Thank you.” He smiled. “You’re a really good friend. I just wanted to tell you, because...I didn’t want you to leave thinking that I wouldn’t ever fix things.” 

Donghae shook his head. “I knew you would.”  

“I didn’t. It wasn’t all his fault, you know? I messed up too. We just didn’t…” he trailed off and tried to use his hands to get his point across. “We couldn’t communicate cleanly after a while. I think part of me wanted to fall in love with Henry to hurt him. I don’t want to be that kind of a bad person,” he said and laughed mirthlessly.

“You’re not a bad person, Ryeowook. You both just made mistakes. Cheer up, okay? It’s alright.”

Ryeowook looked at him and Donghae smiled. Ryeowook shrugged and nodded.

“So what now? Will you try to maintain a friendship with him?” 

“Not right away, but...I guess so. Later.”

Donghae nodded Ryewook took a deep breath and wiped his eyes for a final time. “Thanks,” he said, shrugging Donghae’s arm off lightly. “I’m okay now.”

 “Alright.”

“Do you need help packing?”

  “No, I got it. But if you want to, you can stay and help,” Donghae said, thinking that Ryeowook might also have come up to escape for a while. Ryeowook nodded, and Donghae instructed him with what to do and started working again.

“I can unlock it for you,” Eunhyuk said as they reached their apartment’s front door.

 “No,” Donghae said. “I can do it.”  

“Are you sure?”  

“I got this.”

  “Okay…”

Donghae balanced a box of things on his knee as Eunhyuk laughed at him. He held out his hand for Eunhyuk’s key, and he put it in his hand. He stuck the key into the lock, turned it with difficulty, and caught the box as he pushed the door open with his foot.

“Ha,” Donghae said and shuffled inside.

“Nicely done,” Eunhyuk said, kicking the back of his heel.

“Look, they really did furnish this place.”

Eunhyuk closed the door after them and they looked at the apartment and at each other with wide eyes. Modern, colorful furniture had been arranged around a flat screen television in the living room, and a low table with sitting cushions further in. Donghae put the box down and exhaled, impressed.

“I like it,” he said. “You like it?”  

“I love it. It’s beautiful in here.” 

Donghae smiled and they walked into the kitchen, looking at all the appliances and tools that had been bought for them. Pleased with everything, they walked around commenting on stuff until they arrived at the bedrooms. They were exactly the same, and Donghae wavered uncertainly between things to say about them. He ended up not saying anything at all. The two rooms were very nicely outfitted with everything they would need, plus a lot of space for them to put their things.

Eunhyuk poked his cheek and Donghae jumped, coming out of his thoughts, and laughed nervously.

“What’s up with you? You’re so quiet all of a sudden.”

  “It’s just…Can I be honest?” 

“Can you be honest…I hope that you’re always honest,” Eunhyuk said and laughed.

Donghae looked at him shyly. “I want to sleep with you.”

Eunhyuk laughed again and blushed. “Of course,” he said. “I kind of...assumed that’s how it’d be.” 

“Really?” Donghae said, smiling with relief. “I thought I was being forward.” 

Eunhyuk ran his finger across Donghae’s shoulders. “You can’t be too forward with me.”  

Donghae blushed. “I can’t?” 

“It’s impossible,” Eunhyuk whispered in his ear and then laughed, walking out of the room. Donghae leaned against the wall and took a deep breath, trying to still his heart.

“C’mon!” Eunhyuk called. “Let’s go get the rest of our stuff!”

Donghae turned and walked around the corner, hanging onto the doorframe. Eunhyuk was waiting for him with a smile by the front door.

“Hyukjae,” he said, quickly walking up to him and hugging him tightly. “Every night.”

Eunhyuk hugged him and laughed. “Every night.” He put a finger beneath his chin and kissed him, the motion easy and sweet. “Let’s go.”

After a few trips, they got everything that they had fit into Eunhyuk’s car into the apartment. Everything else was being moved by their company - mostly mass amounts of clothing, and would arrive there later. They stood outside the two bedrooms and stared at each other.

“We should keep our stuff in separate rooms,” Donghae said, crossing his arms and leaning to one side.
“Yeah?”  

“Yeah,” Eunhyuk said, narrowing his eyes. “So…which one do you want?” 

Donghae tightened his lips to suppress a smile. “One is in the corner. And one is not.”  

“That’s right. So one has more windows.”  

“We should flip a coin, and make this really fair.” 

“Fine. Do you have a coin?” Eunhyuk said, opening his wallet. “Never mind, I do.”

“Alright.” They laughed.   “I call heads for the room in the corner.”

“Okay. It’s not like it really matters, since we’ll sleep in the same room,” Donghae said, tiling his head.

Eunhyuk shrugged. “I guess we are just flipping for where our stuff goes. You don’t care about sleeping in a room that has stuff that only belongs to one of us, right?”

“I really don’t care,” Donghae said and nodded. “It just matters that you’re there.”

“So which one do you want to sleep in?” Eunhyuk smiled.

Donghae looked through the doorways of both rooms. “That one,” he said, pointing to the corner room.

 “Good, me too,” Eunhyuk said, getting the coin ready. He tossed it, and they watched as it fell. Heads. They looked at each other and Donghae stuck his tongue out at him. He bent down and picked up a box of stuff.

“It’s yours, fair and square,” he walked towards his room and paused. “Ours.”

 “Right - it’s ours, it’s just...you know, appearances.”

  “We won’t always keep them, will we?”

  “No,” Eunhyuk said, picking up one of his boxes. “I don’t think so.”  

“I wonder.” Donghae smiled and they carried their boxes into the separate rooms.

Their company dropped off the rest of their things and told them to hang all of their clothes up immediately so that they wouldn’t get wrinkled. After everything was into their apartment, they thanked the employees for their work and shooed them out. They spent the next four hours hanging clothes up in their closets and on the clothing racks that had been set up in the communal space of the apartment and unpacking their personal belongings. They kept up a conversation between the rooms or played music to entertain themselves, but eventually Donghae got bored and took a break, sneaking into the other room.

“Hey,” he said, flopping down on the bed. “You made good progress!”

Eunhyuk turned around from arranging his stuff on a bookshelf and sat down on the bed next to him, brushing aside stray objects and pieces of paper. Donghae smiled at him, letting his genuine happiness shine through.

“How are you?” Eunhyuk asked, laying his head on Donghae’s back.

“Wonderful,” Donghae said. “You?” 

“I want to finish unpacking,” Eunhyuk said, sighing and smoothing Donghae’s shirt over his shoulder with his hand. “But we still have a lot to do.”

  “Finish our rooms, put stuff up on the walls, some other miscellaneous stuff...it’s not that bad,” Donghae said, picking up a piece of paper. It was a letter addressed to Eunhyuk, from an E.L.F.

“Hey,” Donghae said slowly. “Do you like girls at all?”  

Eunhyuk’s hand stilled on his shoulder. “No. I mean, sure, I like girls...but not like...I’m not attracted to them.”

“Not at all?”

  “Nope. I realized that as a teenager.”

Eunhyuk laid down next to him and Donghae turned onto his back. Eunhyuk readjusted himself so that his head rested over Donghae’s heart.

“Did you have other crushes?” 

“Yeah,” Eunhyuk said and smiled at Donghae’s inquisitiveness. “None like you, though.” 

“So I’m your first love?” Donghae asked, holding his breath.

“Yes,” Eunhyuk said, propping himself up on his elbows and looking at him. Donghae grinned at him and Eunhyuk bent his neck and kissed him. “You’re my first and only love.”

“I’m lucky to be in love with you,” Donghae said. “Lucky to have you.”

Eunhyuk kissed him again. “This was meant to be.” 

Donghae nodded and Eunhyuk pulled him up and hugged his neck.. “Go finish,” he said, “so we can be together and feel good about it.”  

“I always feel good about it.” 

“You know what I mean,” he said, kissing his cheek. “So that we’re really moved in and don’t have to worry about it.”

“Okay,” he sighed. “I’ll go finish unpacking my stuff.”

“Bye,” Eunhyuk said, smiling sweetly at him, making it hard for Donghae to leave. He lingered in the doorframe and found an excuse to stay for a minute later.

 “I’m hungry,” he said, looking at Eunhyuk cutely. “Order something, ‘kay?”

“Okay,” Eunhyuk said, leaning his chin in his palm and taking his cellphone out of his pocket. “What’s our address?”

 Donghae laughed. “I dunno. Lemme go get it.”  

Eunhyuk laughed with him. “You can finish the other room before food arrives, yeah?”

  “Yeah,” Donghae called from outside. He walked back in and gave a piece of paper with their address on it to him. He stayed there until Eunhyuk told him to get back to unpacking again, and he left, throwing him sad looks over his shoulder. The sooner he finished, the sooner he could spend time with Eunhyuk without any other obligations for the moment.

“So,” Donghae said, staring at the blank walls after they’d eaten. “Do you really want to put up pictures today? It’s already eight.”

They looked at each other. “Eh...Let’s call it quits. We’ve done enough for today,” Eunhyuk sighed. “Good job.”  

“That was actually a very painless move,” Donghae said, climbing into one of the chairs and spinning around in it slowly. “One day.” 

“Yeah. Thank god,” Eunhyuk said and stood up. “I’m gonna go take a shower, okay?” 

“Okay,” Donghae said, watching him leave. Eunhyuk took off his shirt as he walked into the bathroom and he glanced back at Donghae before he closed the door. Donghae stared at the door after it was shut, blushing and covering a smile that he couldn’t suppress with his hand. He did that on purpose, he thought. He’s teasing me.

He curled up in the chair and looked out of the windows. He smiled, falling in love with the beautiful view. Eventually he ran a hand over his forehead and tore his eyes away from it and looked at the apartment. He really liked it. It was theirs, and it was beautiful. It was also extremely quiet, and the reality of being there without the others sunk into him.

He bit his lip. They were alone - really alone. If they became physical with each other, there would be no one who could interrupt them, and they had no reason to not let it take them as far as it would. He blushed. The truth was that he wanted to abuse their newfound privacy and be as affectionate with him as possible. But he was shy, at the same time. What if Eunhyuk wasn’t ready for that? Was he even really ready for that?

I love him, he thought, looking at his reflection in the window. We love each other.

I don’t want to be rejected, he thought, spinning the chair around so he couldn’t see himself anymore. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He won’t. Even if he did, he wouldn’t be unkind. It wouldn’t be because he didn’t want him. He won’t.

When Eunhyuk came out of the bathroom, he walked past Donghae into the kitchen, and Donghae watched him, uncertainty and nervousness making his stomach feel hollow and shaky. Their kitchen had already been stocked with food for them, and Eunhyuk took out a carton of orange juice, glancing back at him.

“You okay?” he asked, taking a glass out of one of the cupboards.

“Mhmm,” Donghae said, raising his eyebrows slightly. He looked at the floor and half shut his eyes. Eunhyuk walked towards him and crouched down, putting his chin on the cushion next to his head. Donghae looked at him and blushed.

“What’s wrong?” he said softly, brushing Donghae’s bangs out of his eyes. His fingers were cool and soft against his forehead. “You’re blushing.”

“I’m…” Donghae stalled, finding it difficult to say the words. After a few seconds he gave up and kissed him. Eunhyuk looked at him in surprise, and Donghae blushed even more. “Sorry. I’m sorry.” 

“Don’t be stupid,” Eunhyuk said, smiling softly at him. “What are you apologizing for?” 

“Nothing,” Donghae said, taking his hand and cradling it next to his heart. “Shy.”

“What?” 

“I’m shy,” Donghae whispered. “Aren’t you?” 

“No,” Eunhyuk said, stroking his cheek with his thumb. “There’s no reason to be shy. Why are you shy?”

  “I don’t know,” Donghae murmured. “Because we’re alone.” 

“So? I wanted to be alone with you,” Eunhyuk said, pulling him up. “Drink some juice.” 

Donghae climbed onto the counter and sat down on it, watching Eunhyuk get another glass and pour juice into it for him. Eunhyuk handed it to him and Donghae took it and drank it quickly.

“It’s not that I don’t want to be alone with you,” he said quietly. “I really...want that. It’s just...I’m shy…Weren’t you ever shy?” 

Eunhyuk pried the glass away from Donghae’s hand and replaced it with his own. “Of course,” he said, taking his other hand and smiling sweetly up at him. “For a very long time, I was shy around you. But being shy is distracting, so why waste any more time feeling that way? We’ve been alone before. It’s not so different now.” 

Donghae nodded and Eunhyuk kissed him, making Donghae’s heart leap. Eunhyuk held him close to his own body and Donghae hugged him, thinking that it was different. But he felt relieved and reassured by him.

“Being this close to me,” he said, holding him closer so that their hearts were beating side-by-side, “and knowing that I accept you and love you just as you are, are you still shy?” 

“No,” Donghae said, feeling kind of foolish.

“Your heart’s beating fast. Are you sure?”  

“You haven’t noticed that it does that whenever you touch me?” 

“No,” Eunhyuk said, and Donghae could feel him smile. “I noticed.”

Eunhyuk sighed and waited patiently until he felt Donghae relax. When he tried to move away, Donghae wouldn’t let him. He squeezed him and Eunhyuk laughed.

“You’re suffocating me,” Eunhyuk gasped. “Go take a shower!” 

“Fine,” Donghae said, releasing him. He slid off of the countertop and quickly kissed him. “You’re too nice.” 

“Just for you,” Eunhyuk said, grinning at him. “You’re special.” 

“The most special?”  

“You know you are.”

“I know, I know.”

Donghae looked at himself in the mirror, wearing his usual sleeping attire: sweatpants and a t-shirt. He pulled his towel off of his head and hung it up, refusing to let himself feel nervous again. There was nothing to be afraid of. He just needed to stop thinking about ifs and whens and behave naturally.

Whatever will happen will happen. He turned around and put his hand on the doorknob. It took him a few seconds to steel his nerves and turn it. He opened the door and looked out. Eunhyuk was sitting with his back to him on the floor next to the windows and looking out, and as soon as Donghae saw him, his last reservations disappeared and he walked towards him. Falling onto his knees behind him, he wrapped his arms around Eunhyuk’s neck and pressed his face against it.

At once, his heart was at peace. It would be okay, he thought, if all he was ever allowed to do was hold this person in his arms and feel his heart beating. Eunhyuk put his hands over Donghae’s arms, completing the gesture, and Donghae sighed and relaxed against him.

“Hyukjae,” Donghae said softly. Eunhyuk tilted his head back the slightest bit to show him that he was listening. “I love you. Will hearing me say that...ever get old?”

  “No,” Eunhyuk breathed. “Not ever.”

Donghae smiled and leaned over him, kissing his neck and collarbones. Eunhyuk let him, holding onto his hands and blushing the slightest bit. “Will saying it ever get old?”

Donghae crawled to the other side of him and Eunhyuk looked at him, a mixture of amusement and seriousness in his smile. Donghae leaned forward and whispered that it never would, because loving him would never get old. Eunhyuk kissed him, moving onto his knees and wrapping his arms around his waist.

Donghae’s heart beat more quickly as the kissing grew deeper and more intimate, but he had no desire to stop. He held onto him, his mouth moving with his, suddenly desperate to be closer to him. As if on cue, Eunhyuk stood up, taking Donghae with him, and pulled him towards the bedroom, turning off the light as he went.

“I can’t see you,” Donghae said, laughing and catching Eunhyuk’s hand. But he didn’t need to see, he realized. All he needed was to feel.

“You remember when you had nightmares all the time, and you used to use a nightlight to escape darkness like this?” 

“Yeah,” Donghae said, putting his hands on either side of Eunhyuk’s waist.

“No matter what kind of nightmare you have, you’ll never need a nightlight again.”

Donghae closed his eyes for a second, his heart and soul rejoicing in the person in front of him. You’ll be here. I’ll have you.

Donghae tilted his head almost painfully slowly and kissed the base of Eunhyuk’s neck, sliding his hands around Eunhyuk’s hips beneath his shirt and up his back. Eunhyuk placed his hands on either side of Donghae’s face, lifted it gently, and their lips met again. Donghae pulled Eunhyuk’s shirt over his head and down his arms, running his hands down his smooth muscles.

Eunhyuk enveloped him in his arms and kissed him more passionately than he ever had before. Donghae closed his eyes and kissed him back with equal enthusiasm, his lips parting under the pressure of Eunhyuk’s. His heart raced and he explored Eunhyuk’s body with his hands. All he wanted was to feel.

Eunhyuk gently pushed him backwards onto the bed and straddled him, kissing his neck. He ran his hands up the middle of Donghae’s chest slowly and Donghae drew a sharp intake of breath. Eunhyuk paused and they both laughed.

“Are you nervous?” 

“No,” Donghae said, laughing. He ran his fingers through Eunhyuk’s hair and kissed him. Never in a million years would he have imagined that he would do this, but now that it was happening, he wanted it. He wanted to share this with him. He flushed hotly and kissed him more deeply. He wanted him.

For now, it was enough for Eunhyuk to undress him. It was enough for them to be so openly physical with each other. It was enough for his blood to race and to feel Eunhyuk’s heart beating just as rapidly. It was enough for him to lose his breath kissing him. It was enough to feel the shock of Eunhyuk’s body against his, skin against skin, with so much intent behind it.

But he would want more, he knew, as Eunhyuk sucked the air out of his lungs and his hand moved towards his hips. He knew that Eunhyuk would give him more, because he wanted this just as much.

[Next Part] Chapter Eleven: With You (Final Chapter)

Happy Days; With You: Chapter Nine

aidenrose — Tue, 23 Mar 2010 07:23:39 GMT

Title: Happy Days; With You
Part: Chapter Nine: No Reason to Cry
Previous Parts: Prologue, Chapter One, Chapter Two, Chapter Three, Chapter Four, Chapter Five, Chapter Six, Chapter Seven, Chapter Eight
Genre: Romance
Pairing: Eunhyuk/Donghae, some Yesung/Ryeowook, Henry/Ryeowook.
Rating: PG-13 (sensuality)
Word Count: 4,300
Synopsis: Donghae returns from China and comes to realize his true feelings towards Eunhyuk in a relationship that transcends friendship.
Next Update: Saturday, August 15st (barring no extreme writer's block. You know the deal.)

Sorry this is late (although it's technically still Saturday for me)...got distracted and frustrated over not being able to post on Livejournal for the past two days so I edited this later than usual. GUYS DID YOU SEE THE FANCAM FROM THE EVENT IN JAPAN? THIIIIIIS *SPAZ*

No Reason to Cry

The door opened quietly, and they looked up. Sungmin came out of the dorm and sat down across from them with his back against the railing.

“Hey,” he said quietly. They nodded at him and Donghae wiped his face again. Even though he’d stopped crying a while ago, his face was still moist. Sungmin took a deep breath and leaned forward.

“Listen…” he began, looking at them and smiling. “You two are my best friends. I love you guys. Back there, I was really surprised...I mean, you two have always been close, but I never thought...” he paused and took another deep breath. “What I want to say is, I’m really happy for you. I want you to be happy. I want you to be so happy that you don’t know what to do with yourselves. Okay?”

“Sungmin,” Eunhyuk said, choking on fresh tears. Amazed that he could cry anymore, Donghae covered his face with his hands. Sungmin laughed and inched forward on his knees and hugged them.

“Thank you,” they said, hugging him. Sungmin laughed again. He let go of them after a few seconds and pinched their cheeks, telling them to smile. Donghae smiled at him, grateful for the way he was treating them. Sungmin nodded once and stood up and stretched.

“You can go back inside now.” 

“Okay,” Donghae said. “Thank you.” 

Sungmin waved a hand at them. “What’s there to say thank you about? This is just how it should be. They’ll come around too.” He motioned with his head at the door. He smiled at them again, and then went downstairs back to his own dorm.

Eunhyuk and Donghae looked at each other, and Donghae laughed and leaned his forehead against Eunhyuk’s. “Don’t cry anymore,” he said. Eunhyuk smiled at him.  Donghae stood up after a minute and pulled Eunhyuk to his feet, holding onto his hands after it was necessary to.

"Do you want to go inside?"  Eunhyuk looked at the door for a second. "No," he said. "I kind of want to just go home and sleep. If you want me there, though..."

"No, it's okay." They hugged each other. "Sweet dreams...'bye," Donghaee said softly, and Eunhyuk left, glancing back at him a few times. Donghae reluctantly watched him go. Soon, he thought, we won't have to always be saying goodbye.

  He quietly opened the door and went back inside, peering around the corner into the living room before moving his body into it. Heechul and Hankyung were no longer there; only Eeteuk, Kangin, Kyuhyun, and Shindong remained. They looked at him as he approached, and Donghae smiled. They looked okay, he thought.

  "Hey," Kangin said as he sat down next to Eeteuk. "You in love with him?"

  "Yeah," he said. "Completely."

  "See?" Kyuhyun said, smirking at Kangin. Kangin shrugged at him.

  "I'm not okay with it, but...I'll try to accept you guys," Kangin said, glancing at him. Donghae smiled.

  "Hyung," he said, "that's good enough."

Kangin nodded and stood up. "See you guys later, then," he said and walked out, rubbing his forehead. Shindong got up and followed him, waving goodbye once.  

"Hyukjae go home?" Eeteuk asked.

Donghae sunk lower into the couch and curled into a ball.   "Yeah."  

"Heechul and Hankyung are nursing their headaches."  

Donghae smothered a laugh. "Honestly, those two..."  

“I guess I’ll go home, too,” Kyuhyun yawned. "Donghae."  

Donghae looked up, raising his eyebrows slightly.  

"After talking about it...I think I can really say that you two should just do whatever makes you happy."  

"Kyu, you're so nice."

  "Don't hit on me."

Donghae laughed, and Kyuhyun laughed with him. "Alright, see you later."

"Bye."  He left, and Donghae shook his head. As if. Eeteuk laughed and sipped from another cup of coffee. Donghae blinked at him, amazed that he was still drinking coffee. Eeteuk caught his eye and smirked.

  "What?" Donghae said, smiling involuntarily.

"Nothing. I think that went pretty well, overall."

Donghae nodded. "Shindong okay?"

  "Nah, it makes him uncomfortable. He'll get used to it, though. It's not like you're going to be kissing in front of him or anything. There's not that much to adjust to."  

"Right...I hope it won't bother him, because Hyukjae likes working with him..."

Eeteuk nodded. "I think it surprised everyone a little bit. We're all affectionate with each other, and I think none of them considered that there might be something deeper behind it."  

"How can you, in this job..."

  "You know you'll have to keep this a secret from our fans, right?"  

"Of course. We just wanted you to know, since...well, you know."  

"I understand. I think they're glad you told them. Sort of flattered that you trust them enough."

  Donghae sighed and smoothed his shirt out. "We've known each other for a long time. We're like a family."  

"We are a family." They smiled.  

"Still..." Donghae said under his breath.

Eeteuk tilted his head.  "Still what?"

Donghae looked up at him. "Actually...Hyung, we want to move out..."

Eeteuk looked at him sadly. "You don't have to do that," he said quietly. Donghae's throat caught at the tone of his voice.

"We want to."  

"You want to live together?"

Donghae nodded, taking a quick deep breath. "I miss him. I want to be with him, but I can't here. Not now, you know? If I slept downstairs, or he slept up here, it would make everyone uncomfortable, which would make us uncomfortable. I mean, if one of us was a girl we wouldn't be here. I don't want to have to go out just to spend time with him. I should be with him...I belong with him. I really love him."

  "I understand," Eeteuk said, sighing. "No help for it. I'm going to miss you a lot."

  "I'm going to miss you...all of you..." Donghae said, wiping away tears.  

"Want me to talk to the managers with you?"

  Donghae nodded. "Hyung, can I hug you?"  

Eeteuk made a tsk noise with his tongue and put his coffee cup down. Donghae hugged him and Eeteuk patted his back. "You'll be no less active. We'll still see you for every activity we do together. And just because you'd live together doesn't mean that you wouldn't be here, too."  

"Yeah," Donghae sighed. "I haven't lived apart from everyone in years, though. It'll be weird for a while, adjusting..."  

"No, you'll adjust immediately. You'll be with him. It'll be harder for us."  

"I'm sorry, Hyung."  

Eeteuk smacked the back of his head and he laughed. "I'm jealous, to be honest. I want to get married." He let go of Donghae and sat against the armrest of the couch, smiling at him.

  "I always thought I wanted to get married. Have children," Donghae said, leaning his chin on his knees. He shrugged. "Things just change. I hope you get married, Hyung..."  

"Thanks. You think I'd be good for marriage?"

"Absolutely. You'd be a good father."  

Eeteuk smiled sadly at him, and they both understood the unspoken sentiment. Eeteuk had been like a brother, but also like a father, to Donghae since his father died. It had brought them closer, and Donghae would never forget how kind Eeteuk was to him.  

"Well," Eeteuk said, "here's for hoping I get to. Anyway...Let's talk together tomorrow, the three of us, about living arrangements. I think we should make it look like you're moving in as friends."  

Yeah, Donghae thought, that's probably best. He didn't want to come out to his company, because really, it wasn't any of their business. But more than that, he just doubted that many more people would be easy to accept it. The other members had known them for years, and it was still hard. The wrong time, the wrong culture. But not the wrong relationship.  

 "Well, we're not thrilled, but..." their manager stalled, looking at them with disgruntlement. "I mean...it's another ten minutes out of your schedule, you know?"  

"Ten minutes? You can do closer than that," Eeteuk said from the manager's bed, tossing a pen up and down. Donghae and Eunhyuk were sitting on either side of him, wearing apologetic smiles.

  "Why do you want to do this, again?"

  "Tired of living with so many people," Donghae said. "Didn't you ever want to room with your best friend?"

"In college...You're professionals now..."  

"But we're still in college."  

Manager-hyung rolled his eyes. "So, what? You feel like you're missing out?"

They shrugged. "I want a little more quiet than I get here. Everyone's loud here, you know? I don't even live with Eeteuk, and I can hear him laughing down here…”  

"So noisy," Donghae sniffed, and Eeteuk punched his arm.  

The manager sighed. "We're not going to say no. I mean, I understand, you guys want some more independence and quiet. It is a lot of people. I would know, seeing as how I live here, too."

  "So you're saying yes?"

  He sighed and snatched his pen back from Eeteuk. "Yeah. Fine. If you really want to, we'll get you a place. I mean, Heechul lived with Kibum and Hankyung for a while, and Siwon lives with his parents. I just don't want them to get the idea that you can all split up, because it'd be hell to transport you places."  

Eeteuk smiled coyly. "They won't."  

He shrugged. "Then we'll send you information when we have a place in mind for you. I'll give it to you, Hyukjae, and you can give it to Donghae. I hope you don't mind if we search for you. You guys don’t have time to."  

"No, not at all. Just make it nice, okay, Hyung? I love you..." Donghae said. Eeteuk rolled his eyes at Donghae's shamelessness and their manager smirked.   

"If you think that will make me opt to get you a nicer place..."

  "It'll work," Eunhyuk said, standing up. "You know it will. We all know that we like each other. It's why we keep you around."  

"You keep me around because without me, you'd be like fish out of water."

  "It's ‘cause we love you," Donghae said, laughing and walking to the door. "Thanks, Hyung!"  

"Thank you," Eunhyuk and Eeteuk said, bowing and walking out after Donghae.

Donghae’s phone vibrated on his nightstand, waking him up. He grabbed it and answered the call, falling back onto his pillow. He guessed who it was even before he heard anything, and he was right.

“Hey,” Eunhyuk said. “Sleep well?”

“Yeah,” Donghae said, rubbing his eyes. “What’s up?” 

“Manager-hyung gave me a bunch of information on possible apartments...you know, photos and stuff. Can I come up and we can look at them together?” 

“Oh! Sure,” Donghae said, blinking a few times to wake himself up more. “Come over.”

“Okay, see you soon.”

“Bye,” Donghae said and put the phone back onto his nightstand. If they found an apartment they liked, Eunhyuk wouldn’t have to call him to say good morning. They could wake up together. He wanted to. He wanted to wake up and see and feel him, and know that he was there with him. So he got out of bed, looking forward to looking at the information that Eunhyuk was bringing him.

He stepped out of his room and was assaulted by the noise of Eeteuk’s laughter and Heechul talking loudly about something. He walked right past them and got a glass of milk.

 “Oh, Donghae,” Eeteuk said, and Heechul stopped talking. “Good morning.”

“Good morning,” Donghae smiled and walked over to them. “Why so loud so early?” 

“Why are you even up so early?” Heechul said. “Usually when we don’t have to get up, you sleep.”

“Hyukjae called me. He’s coming up to talk, because the manager downstairs gave him some pages to look at.”

“Ah,” Heechul said knowingly. “Apartment hunting.” 

“Yeah,” Donghae smiled.

“You’re really leaving me?” 

“I’m not leaving any of you. I’m just not going to live with you anymore.”

“Same thing,” Heechul whined. Eeteuk yawned and stretched over the back of the couch.

“Well, we’ll stay out of your way,” Eeteuk said. Heechul pursed his lips and stood up.

“I take the hint. I’m gonna go bug Hankyung,” he said and disappeared. Donghae put his glass into the sink as the doorbell rang, and he went to answer it. Eunhyuk was standing there holding a folder and they smiled at each other. Every time Donghae saw him, he was always a little amazed by how beautiful he was.

“Good morning,” he said, and Donghae stepped aside to let him in. “Where is everyone?”  

“Huh?” Donghae walked back inside and blinked. “Eeteuk was just here. I dunno.”

  “Oh well,” Eunhyuk said and sat down on the couch. “C’mere.”

Donghae blushed and sat down next to him, their shoulders touching. Eunhyuk opened the folder and handed a thin stack of paper to him.
 “Have you had a chance to look at this already?” Donghae asked, looking at the first page.

“Just briefly. There are three apartments. He wants us to look at this and pick one to visit.”

“Just one?”

  “Yeah, just one.” 

“Okay…” Donghae flipped through the pages and Eunhyuk pointed out bits he liked and didn’t like.

“What about this one?” He held up a page with photographs of the interior of an apartment. “Those windows are huge...Won’t that be kind of exposed…?” 

“No, they’re tinted on the outside. I like the wooden floors...”  

“It looks big.”

  “It is big. All three are. Remember, we have to have space for clothing and stuff for work.”  

“Good point,” Donghae nodded, comparing the photos of the apartments. He looked at Eunhyuk. “Do you have a favorite?

”  “Not really...I like that one, though, the one with the big windows. Besides, look at the kitchen.”  

“I don’t know how to cook,” Donghae, grimacing.

“With a kitchen like that, you’ll learn.”

“You want to visit this one, then?”

  “Yeah.” 

“Okay,” Donghae smiled and put the papers on the table. Eunhyuk pulled him back and Donghae put his head on his lap, closing his eyes. Eunhyuk touched his cheek with the back of his hand and lightly stroked it. Donghae felt peaceful, like this was where he belonged. Like he was meant to be touched by him.

But they remembered where they were, and Donghae sat up after a few minutes. “Soon,” he said, running his hand over Eunhyuk’s face and down his neck. Eunhyuk smiled at him and they stood up. Donghae gathered the pages together and gave them back to Eunhyuk. He walked him to the door and watched him go. Then he quietly shut the door and went to get ready for his schedule later.

“Wait a sec,” Donghae said, as his manager drove away with just him in the car. “Hyukjae isn’t coming?”  

“I’m dropping you off. He’s going to come by after he’s done with his schedule, and he’ll take you home.” 

“Okay,” Donghae said, sinking down into his seat. “Is it far?”  

“No, it’s about seven minutes away.”

  “Ah hah! Eeteuk was right.” 

“Seven minutes of sleep lost,” he reminded him. No, thought Donghae, probably more than that. He blushed and turned his face towards the window. They arrived shortly and Donghae looked up at the complex. It was large. They got out and met with the administrator, who gave them a key and the apartment number.   

“What floor is it on?”  

“Top floor.”

  “Really?”

  “Yup,” Manager-hyung said, pushing him into the elevator. “The fifteenth floor.” 

“Awesome,” Donghae said, bouncing up and down until he told him to stop. He gave him the key, and Donghae turned it over a few times. They arrived, and found the number. There were only three apartments on this floor. They walked to the correct one, and Donghae unlocked it.

They walked inside and Donghae gaped. The apartment was brightly lit by natural light from windows stretching along an entire wall from the ceiling to the floor, and the sunlight reflected off of the new wooden floors. This apartment had never been lived in before. He took off his shoes and walked inside, looking at the spaciousness with wide eyes.

“This okay?” He looked back at his manager, who grimaced as if he was resisting smiling at Donghae.

“If it wasn’t, we wouldn’t offer it.”

“Right,” he said, nodding. “This is awesome!” 

“Well, since you like it, I’ll just leave you here to absorb it for a while. Promise you’ll look around carefully, okay?”

  “Sure, I promise.” 

“Hyukjae should be here in about an hour, and he has a key. You’ll be okay by yourself, of course.”

  “Of course.”  

“Great,” he said, handing him a stack of papers. “This is information about it. If you like it and want to move in, tell me later.”

“Okay...Thanks, Hyung. I’ll see you later.” 

He nodded and left. Donghae locked it after him and then tentatively took a few steps further into the apartment. It was more beautiful than it had been in the photographs. He walked straight towards the wall of windows and looked down, feeling a slight sense of vertigo. He let his eyes come up and took in their view properly. They were looking out over Seoul. From this high up, he was sure that it would be spectacular at night, when it lit up. He turned around and looked at the interior; the kitchen would be as nice, if not nicer, than the photograph once the company outfitted it.

It was large for two people, he thought, but it was relaxing in a way. But...empty. Would he really not get lonely, without the companionship of his friends? He looked around at the high ceilings and walls, perfectly white and angled interestingly. Wouldn’t he miss them?

Yeah, he thought. He would. He sat down against the glass, which he knew was extremely thick, and let himself cry a little bit. He would miss the noise and the bickering that came along with living with them. But it would be replaced with something, he told himself. He wanted to be with Eunhyuk more. He would miss them, but not enough.

I have no reason to cry, he thought. He suddenly smiled through his tears and looked around the empty apartment with an extreme fondness. This was where he would live with him, he thought. He was lucky to be able to live with him. He stood up and ran his hand across the shiny, smooth countertop. Lucky to live with the person he loved.

He took off his jacket and laid it across the counter. He could be really happy here. He walked into the kitchen and looked at the lights and the drawers. Everything was smooth and clean. And pretty.

He turned away and explored the apartment, lingering in the doorframe of one of the bedrooms, his heart beating quickly. Would they share a room? He blushed, thinking about it. The two rooms were identical; wooden floors, spacious, high ceilings, beautiful windows. Just like the rest of the apartment. He knew they would both be furnished with the same furniture, which meant two beds, but would they sleep apart…?

He bit his lip for a few seconds, suddenly unsure. He wanted to sleep with him. He knew they couldn’t get rid of the second bed even if they did sleep together, because they would need it to keep up the appearance of being just roommates. But would it mean asking Eunhyuk? He blushed again and turned away, walking to the middle of what would be the living room.

He sat down in the sun and waited for Eunhyuk to come. They would share a room, wouldn’t they? Wasn’t that a part of living together? He curled up on the floor, absorbing the warm sunlight. It would be so easy to just go to sleep here. But he didn’t want to take a nap, because he was waiting for Eunhyuk, and he wanted to be awake when he arrived.

So he passed the time by reading the information that his manger had left him - listings of the apartment’s assets and a rough plan for what the company would provide them with, as well as moving dates and other miscellaneous facts - and envisioning where things would go. The sun was beginning to go down, so he turned on the lights, and went back to waiting.

When he heard the click of a key in the lock, he flew to his feet and ran to the door, just as Eunhyuk opened it and poked his head inside. Donghae dragged him inside, gushing over how nice it was. They toured it again, together, and Eunhyuk looked around it in surprise.

“I didn’t think it would be this nice,” he said, smiling. “Awesome.”

“You want to move in?”  

Eunhyuk looked at him and put his hands in Donghae’s pockets. “Yeah. Do you?”  

Donghae nodded, and Eunhyuk smiled. “Okay then.” 

They walked to the windows and looked out of them. He had been right about the view; Seoul at night was beautiful. Donghae smiled and slid his hands around Eunhyuk’s waist, hugging him from behind and perching his chin on his shoulder, looking at the view with him. Eunhyuk put his hands over Donghae’s and they stood like that for a few minutes, just looking at things and letting the feel of the apartment sink in. Donghae knew that as long as Eunhyuk was with him, he wouldn’t feel lonely. Or if he did, it would be the kind of loneliness that comes to every human being regardless of their surroundings. When and if that happened, Eunhyuk would be the best thing for him.

"Hyukjae," he said, tilting his head so that his lips brushed his neck as he spoke. "I'm happy with you."  

Eunhyuk tilted his head back, exposing his neck, and Donghae kissed it. Eunhyuk told him that he was overjoyed each day to be with him, and Donghae smiled, secretly loving the feel of Eunhyuk's throat vibrating as he spoke. Donghae kissed him again and then nuzzled his face against his neck.

  "Hey," Eunhyuk said softly. "We live here."  

Donghae laughed and squeezed him. "I know."

  "I like it here."

  "Me too."   Eunhyuk turned around and kissed him. Donghae clung to him, reveling in the intimate yet painfully brief contact. Eunhyuk hesitated, his face mere millimeters from Donghae’s, and they lost themselves in each other’s eyes. The look in them made Donghae’s heart race, because they showed him how special he was to him.

“We should go,” Eunhyuk whispered halfheartedly and kissed him again, their lips gentle and affectionate. Eunhyuk was his precious jewel, something that he wanted to cherish and love.

“I know,” Donghae sighed, sliding his hands over Eunhyuk’s shoulders. He kissed his cheek and went to get his jacket and things, reluctantly ending their moment. Lately he was wanting more and more of those moments. It was never enough.

“I want to stay here,” Donghae said as he turned off the lights. “You know? I want to be moved in already. I just want time with you.”  

“I know,” Eunhyuk said, kissing his hand on the way to the door. “But we’ll have all the time in the world soon.”  

“Soon,” Donghae said again. He looked back at Eunhyuk and opened his mouth to ask him about where they would sleep, but he blushed and turned away, opening the door.

“What?” Eunhyuk said, poking him in the back.

“Nothing,” he said, locking it and glancing at him with a sudden shyness.

“What is it?”  

“It’s nothing,” Donghae said, skipping away. Eunhyuk followed him, bugging him for what he was thinking about until they reached his car. They didn’t have access to the underground garage yet, so Eunhyuk had parked outside. It was completely dark now, and Donghae commented on what a beautiful night it was to switch the subject.

“We’re just going back to the dorm now, right?”

  “Yeah,” Eunhyuk said. “We need to go to sleep fairly soon and get up early tomorrow.” 

“If I didn’t love what we do, I’d hate what we do.”

  “Tired?”

Donghae nodded. “Work and school.”  

“Makes you wish summer would come soon, doesn’t it?”  

“It does,” Donghae moaned, rubbing his eyes. “But it’s okay.”

They walked up the stairs and Eunhyuk said goodnight, unlocking the door to his dorm. Donghae leaned against the railing and watched him, and when he opened it, they both jumped in surprise. Everyone else was there waiting for them.

“What’s going on?” Donghae laughed, and they pulled them inside.

“We know you’re not leaving for a few days, but we’re really busy soon, so we wanted to get together to say goodbye,” Sungmin was saying.

“Guys,” Donghae moaned, starting to cry and cursing himself for crying so easily. “We’re not leaving you. This isn’t goodbye!” 

“We know, but...we won’t see you as much.”  

“We’ll meet all the time,” Donghae said, wiping his eyes. “It’s not like we’ll be strangers.”

  “But…” Kyuhyun said. “You won’t be coming back to the dorms, right? Not unless it’s absolutely essential for the group.”  

Donghae looked at Eunhyuk, and he knew that it was true. As long as they were together, they wouldn’t come back to the dorms.

“Not...Not to live,” Eunhyuk said quietly.

 “So it is an end,” Kyuhyun said. “Understand?” 

Donghae nodded, and the others hugged them. He sobbed, listening to them wish them well and telling them that they would miss them. Hands held him as he cried, and when he was done, they dragged him to the couch and they ate together. He kept meeting Eunhyuk’s eyes and knew that he was feeling the same mixture of emotions as he was. And he knew that Eunhyuk would understand him, too.

[Next Part] Chapter Ten: Better Than a Nightlight

Happy Days; With You: Chapter Eight

aidenrose — Tue, 23 Mar 2010 07:14:20 GMT

Title: Happy Days; With You
Part: Chapter Eight: Black Coffee and Vanilla Ice Cream
Previous Parts: Prologue, Chapter One, Chapter Two, Chapter Three, Chapter Four, Chapter Five, Chapter Six, Chapter Seven
Genre: Romance
Pairing: Eunhyuk/Donghae, some Yesung/Ryeowook, Henry/Ryeowook.
Rating: PG-13 (sensuality)
Word Count: 4,445
Synopsis: Donghae returns from China and comes to realize his true feelings towards Eunhyuk in a relationship that transcends friendship.
Next Update: Saturday, August 8st (barring no extreme writer's block. You know the deal.)

So I made the crepes. ^w^ With nutella and fruit. I felt soooo sick after eating them, but it was so worth it. Deliciously delicious. So about this chapter, I can't believe I finished it. *O*!! Hardest one to write yet, although I don't really know why...Anyway, please read and enjoy! ^ ^ /

I can't believe I forgot this earlier...Thanks to tvxqsocks for supporting me, reading my drafts and helping me to edit!!! Could not have finished this in time without her.

Black Coffee and Vanilla Ice Cream

Donghae’s heart pounded. What should he say? He looked at Eunhyuk. He looked just as hesitant and surprised as he was. Yesung poured his coffee out in the sink and dropped the cup carelessly onto the counter.

“You don’t need to say anything,” he said, his voice tight, and walked out of the kitchen. “It’s so apparent.”

Donghae watched him leave, open his door, and softly close it behind him. He sat down at the table as soon as he was gone and hid his head in his hands. God. He took a deep breath to calm himself. His heart hurt for them and for Yesung. He dropped his hands and met Eunhyuk’s eyes.

“It wasn’t supposed to happen like this,” he said dejectedly.

“You think he’ll tell anyone? Why was he so angry?” Eunhyuk said quietly, stretching his arms out across the table.

Donghae rested his head on his arms and sighed. “I dunno. I guess because of things with Ryeowook.”

“Why is he angry at us, though?”

Donghae looked at him for a second. “Because they used to be like this.”

“He’s jealous?” 

Donghae shrugged. “Maybe.”

“What should we do?” Donghae’s heart flew into his throat and he looked at Eunhyuk, telling him with his eyes that he didn’t know what to do. He could see that Eunhyuk didn’t have a clear idea either. Eunhyuk sighed and lightly touched his arm with his fingertips.

“Were we that obvious?” he said after a few seconds. 

“I didn’t think so...it’s just...Yesung and Ryeowook have kept it secret for so long.”

“I don’t want him to tell anyone. I want to tell them.” 

“He won’t say anything,” Donghae said. Probably. But then again, if Yesung was bitter enough to confront them about it, would he tell anyone else in his anger?

“Donghae,” Eunhyuk said softly, looking at him soberly, “should we tell them?”

 “Now?” Donghae’s heart froze for a second.

“We’ve been meaning to, haven’t we?”

 “But…” he stalled. Yes, they meant to tell them. No, they didn’t want to keep it a secret. But it would change things irreversibly, and that frightened him. “How do we tell them?” he whispered.

Eunhyuk rubbed his eyes and looked down at the table. “I don’t know. ‘Contrary to what you all thought, I like boys, and this is my boyfriend’?”

“Don’t think they’ll take that very smoothly,” Donghae said and half smiled.  

“No,” Eunhyuk agreed.

They slumped on the table in silence for a few minutes. The coffee pot gurgled and fell silent as well, finishing its brewing. Eunhyuk drew patterns on Donghae’s skin with his fingertip. The sun was beginning to rise above Korea, and the room was gradually getting lighter. They had to decide soon.

“Let’s call Eeteuk.” 

“Why?”

“Because…” Donghae smiled sadly. “I feel like we should tell him before we tell the rest. We can just talk to him. He’ll be okay with it. He was alright when Ryeowook told him.”

“Ryeowook talked to him?”  

Donghae nodded. “I told him to when he told me.”

“And he was really okay?”

“Yeah.”

“Then...let’s call him,” he said, sighing nervously. Donghae took his phone out of his pocket and held it in his hands for a few seconds, both of them staring at it. Then Donghae filled the spaces between Eunhyuk’s fingers with his own and pressed speed dial for Eeteuk’s cellphone.

After three rings, he answered it.

“Hello?”  

“Eeteuk-hyung.”

“Donghae. Why are you calling me so early? I have a hangover,” he moaned.

Donghae opened his mouth and looked at Eunhyuk. Eunhyuk looked back at him nervously, but squeezed his hand reassuringly. The seconds passed as Donghae worked up his courage to speak.

 “Donghae?” 

“Sorry. Eunhyuk and I need to talk to you. It’s important.”

 A pause. “Where are you?” 

“Downstairs. In the others’ dorm.”

“Okay,” Eeteuk sighed. “Be there in a minute…”

“Thanks, hyung. I’m sorry I woke you up.”  

“It’s fine. It’s important, right?”

“Yeah.” 

Eeteuk terminated the call and Donghae put his phone onto the table. He took a deep breath and told Eunhyuk that he’d be there in a minute. Donghae stood up and hugged him quickly. Eunhyuk leaned into Donghae’s embrace for the few seconds that it lasted, drawing as much comfort from it as he could.

“Should we really do this?” Donghae said quietly, sitting down in the chair next to him.

“Too late now, right?” Eunhyuk laughed.

“No,” Donghae said, biting his lip. “We can make something up if…” 

“Donghae,” he said quietly, leaning forward and hugging him with one arm. “We should tell them if we trust them.” 

“It won’t ever be the same,” Donghae whispered. He closed his eyes, feeling tears start to prick at them. “Nothing will.”

“No matter what...nothing will stay the same.” Eunhyuk kissed his forehead and they heard a soft knock from the front door. Donghae stood up and quietly walked over to the door. He opened it and Eeteuk greeted him with a tired smile.   

“Thank you,” Donghae whispered, and Eeteuk nodded and walked into the kitchen. Donghae followed him and leaned against the counter.

“Good morning,” Eeteuk said, yawning. He headed straight for the coffee pot and poured himself a cup of it. He set it down on the counter and opened the freezer, moving sluggishly yet with direction. Donghae and Eunhyuk furtively exchanged glances and simultaneously took deep breaths.

“So?”

“Hyung, it’s important, so when you’re done…” Donghae sat down on the counter, nervously watching Eeteuk. Eeteuk glanced at them with raised eyebrows and brought a tub of vanilla ice cream out of the freezer.

“Fine, then,” he said. He scooped ice cream out and dropped it into his black coffee.

“Is that good, hyung?” Eunhyuk asked. Eeteuk laughed and affirmed that it was. He sat down opposite Eunhyuk with his coffee and ice cream and stirred it around with a spoon.

“Alright?” he smiled at them and sipped his concoction. “Which one of you wants to start?”

Eunhyuk and Donghae looked at each other. You start, Donghae pleaded at him with his eyes. He knew that Eunhyuk was as nervous as he was, but he didn't want to start. He didn't have the courage. Eunhyuk half smiled understandingly at him and turned back to Eeteuk.

“We have something to confess,” he said, folding his hands on the table and looking down at them.

“Ah,” Eeteuk said, stirring the ice cream around in the coffee and looking at it as if the swirls of melted ice cream were especially interesting. After a pause, he looked up and smiled at Eunhyuk.

“So,” he said quietly and motioned at Donghae with his thumb. “Is he your boyfriend?”

Eunhyuk and Donghae exchanged surprised looks and Eeteuk snickered into his coffee cup.

“Yeah,” Eunhyuk said softly, a trace of amazement in his voice. “He is.”

Donghae’s heart beat that much faster hearing him say it to someone else. I am. He slipped forward and sat down next to Eunhyuk. Eeteuk looked at them both and his smile widened with genuine pleasure.

“That’s good,” he said. Donghae’s eyebrows rose and Eeteuk laughed at him. “I’m happy for you. I’ve been waiting for this.”

“Hyung,” Eunhyuk said, laughing. “Are we that transparent?” 

Eeteuk looked at them wryly over the rim of his cup. “I’ve known you two for ten years.”

“Thank you,” Donghae said. He shared a smile with Eunhyuk, feeling relieved and uplifted, and then smiled at Eeeteuk. “Really.”

Eeteuk shrugged. “Yesung, Ryeowook, Henry...Now you two.” He sipped his coffee. “You’d better not be as much trouble as them.”

Eunhyuk and Donghae looked at each other. As much trouble? Would they ever break up and be as bitter as them? Donghae didn’t think so. He couldn’t imagine wanting to be with anyone else. No matter what happened, they would work it out. They would listen to each other.

“I think…” Eunhyuk began, looking at Donghae thoughtfully, “that even though it’s different now, we’ll always be good friends, no matter what happens. Because that’s what we’ve been for most of our lives.”

“I’m in love with my best friend,” Donghae laughed. Eeteuk smiled at them and they blushed.

“So what happened? You two share a dream about telling me and were so inspired that you couldn’t wait?”

“No,” Donghae said, biting his lip. “Yesung knows.” 

Eeteuk blinked at them, nonplussed. “And?”  

Donghae sighed and retold the story of how they’d woken up too early, thought that someone else was up, and were confronted by Yesung.

“So...” Eeteuk said, putting his cup into the sink and sitting down again. “Do you want everyone to know?”

They nodded.

“You do?” Eeteuk smiled. “I think that’s best. So you called me because you’re afraid that Yesung will spill the beans, and you want to know how to confess first?”

“Pretty much,” Eunhyuk said, leaning back in his chair. "Although we've been meaning to tell everyone anyway. Donghae said we should call you.”  

“I feel better,” Donghae said quietly, and they laughed.

“Why?” Eeteuk smiled.

“You’re Hyung,” Donghae said simply and Eunhyuk nodded.

Eeteuk accepted this with a mirthful laugh and then folded his hands on the table. “Okay. How do you want to tell them?” 

They looked at each other uncertainly. “Maybe it’s like ripping a band aid off,” Eunhyuk said, tilting his head. “The quicker you take it off the less it will hurt.”  

“As in, we should tell them all at once?”

Eunhyuk nodded. “What do you think?”   Donghae bit his lip and thought about it. If they told them individually, it might take all day, not to mention how tiring that would be. And that way, someone might hear it from someone other than themselves.

“I think we should tell them all at once,” Donghae said.  

“Okay,” Eeteuk said, standing up and putting his cup into the sink. “Now we just need to figure out what to tell them. How long have you even been like this?”

“A month.”

“So slow,” Eeteuk whistled. “Well, that makes it easier...you haven’t been keeping this a secret very long, so that should rule out people being hurt by you not confessing sooner.”

“Do you think they’d want us to confess, though?”

“You want to confess, and that’s what matters.”

“Is that all that matters?” He looked at Eunhyuk.

“No...but...this matters more. I don’t want to keep it a secret. I want to be accepted.” 

“But what if they don’t…?”

“They will,” Eunhyuk said. “I think...they’ll be shocked, but...they’ll get over it. First and foremost, we’re a team. We’re friends.”

Donghae nodded, hoping that he was right.

“So,” Eeteuk said. “What do you want to tell them?”

Donghae walked up the stairs to his own dorm with Eeteuk, reviewing their plan in his mind. They’d have breakfast separately as they usually did, and then Eeteuk would gather everyone upstairs and give them the chance to speak. Eat first, Eeteuk had said, so that they’ll be in a better mood. And if anyone gets upset, if it’s awkward, you don’t have to stick around and eat a meal with everyone. You guys can escape afterwards if you want to.

Eeteuk unlocked the door and Donghae walked straight in to the bathroom to take a shower. He wanted to be alone, to get clean, and to settle his nerves, and nothing would do that better for him than a hot shower. He didn’t take a long one, because everyone else would be waking up about now, but it was enough. He dressed, dried his hair, and curled up in his bed.

Hyukjae, he thought, I want them to accept us.

His throat caught and he pressed his fingers against his eyes, willing himself not to cry. He flipped his cellphone open and texted him.

I’m scared.

He stared at the cellphone, waiting for the reply. He didn’t have to wait long for it to vibrate in his hands and the message to pop up on the screen.

I’m scared too.

Donghae smiled. To him, that was more reassuring than Eunhyuk telling him not to worry. It was more reassuring to know that he felt the same way. He texted him again.

I’m taking a nap. You should too if you can.

Donghae closed the phone and snuggled into his bed. He should try to get as much sleep before they told them, because the more rested he was, the more coherent he would be. And the less upset he would be if…

Don’t expect anything, he told himself. He closed his eyes and drifted into shallow sleep.

“Donghae.” 

He woke up with a start. Shindong was standing over him and poking him. He yawned and swatted at him sleepily.

“C’mon, wake up. Breakfast.”

“Ah!” Donghae sat up and swung out of bed. “Good, I’m starving.” 

He felt refreshed after his nap and walked out into the kitchen, stretching his arms over his head. When he reached the kitchen, he burst out laughing. Heechul’s head was lying on the table, a sleeping mask pulled over his eyes and a bag of ice lying on his head. Hangeng was in a similar situation, wearing sunglasses and looking as if he was going to puke at any moment, simply hanging over the edge of the table.

“How much did you drink?” Donghae chortled. “See, this is why you shouldn’t drink, hyung.”

“Shut up.”

Donghae sat down and laughed into his hand.

“It isn’t funny!” Heechul snapped. “Just ‘cause you’ve never had one...Aissh…”

“Sorry,” Donghae said, straightening his face. “What are we eating? Cereal and stuff? See, this is why you shouldn’t be so irresponsible, Hankyu-” 

“Shut up. Lower your voice, god.”

“Sheesh…” Donghae stood up poured himself a glass of orange juice. “It’s your own fault…”

 “Don’t wanna hear it…”

Eeteuk set a pot of coffee down on the table, and with what looked like a tremendous effort, Heechul poured himself a cup of it and drank it straight. Hangeng made a pathetic sort of noise and reached for the pot weakly. Donghae shook his head and poured himself a bowl of cereal. He sat down with it and watched them drink coffee and moan, trying not to laugh at them.

Alcohol, he thought. What a waste.

Eeteuk tried to get them to eat something, but Heechul just sent him death glares and Hangeng muttered incoherently and refused everything. After Donghae finished eating, Eeteuk met his eyes, a clear question in them. Donghae nodded almost imperceptibly and washed out his bowl.

Here we go.

Eeteuk walked out of the room, raising his phone to his ear, and Donghae’s heart soared into his throat. He bit his lip and shook his head. Have to.

He looked at the clock. It was almost nine o’clock. Want to? Sort of.

“Guys,” Eeteuk poked his head out of his room. “Stay out here, okay?”

They turned their heads and looked at him, nonplussed.

“Why?”

“We need to talk about something together,” he said and disappeared again, calling someone else.

“What’s that about?” Heechul moaned.

Before Donghae felt pressured to say anything, the doorbell rang, and he went to answer it, knowing that it would be Eunhyuk. Eeteuk would call him first.

He opened it and Eunhyuk greeted him normally and walked inside. He caught sight of Heechul and Hangeng and smothered a laugh.

“Why are you here?” Heechul said exasperatedly. “Leave us alone.” 

“Sorry,” Eunhyuk said, laughing. “Everyone’s coming up here.”

“Everyone? Why?” Shindong asked as Heechul moaned and covered his head. Hangeng sunk down in his chair and partially disappeared beneath the table.

“Because Eeteuk’s calling us and telling us to get up here.” 

“Why?”

“To talk,” Eunhyuk said, sitting down in the living room. “About stuff.” 

Shindong sighed as Donghae sat down next to Eunhyuk to wait. They sat in silence until the others came up and they made speculative small talk with them. Eeteuk surfaced from his room again and perched on the armrest of one of the sofas.

“Get over here,” he called to Heechul and Hangeng. They moaned and Heechul spewed off complaints, but they lugged themselves into the room and sat down. Donghae glanced at Eunhyuk, feeling butterflies start to appear in his stomach. Eeteuk motioned for everyone to be quiet, and after a few seconds the noise died down, and Donghae’s nervousness got worse.

“So,” Eeteuk said. “We need to talk, as a group, about something important. Hyukjae and Donghae want and need to tell you all something. They’ll probably surprise you, but try to think openly about this, alright?” 

They looked at Donghae and Eunhyuk, and Donghae blushed. “Okay,” they murmured, frowning with confusion or exchanging glances with the others.

“And,” Eeteuk said, “nothing that they say here will leave this room for now, got it? You don’t tell anyone else. Second, nothing is going to change that will affect Super Junior.”

“Hyung,” Sungmin said. “You make it sound so serious.”

“It is.”

Sungmin raised his eyebrows and leaned back into the couch. “So, what is it?” he said, looking at Donghae and then Eunhyuk.

“You want to start?” Eeteuk looked at them. “Who wants to start?” 

They looked at each other for a second, and then Eunhyuk looked at them. “I’ll start.”

Thank you, Donghae thought. He looked at the other members. They were all looking at them. Everyone was there except for Siwon and Kibum. The only one who was looking at them with anything other than curiosity was Yesung, and Donghae quickly looked away. He didn’t know, and didn’t want to think about, how he would react. Eunhyuk took a deep breath.

“We’ve thought about this for a long time - whether to tell you or not - and as you can see, we’ve decided to tell you. We’ve wanted to tell you, but we thought we should give it some time and wait. The point is, we haven’t lied to you, and we’re telling you now because we don’t want to.”

He paused and drew breath. “Honestly, we’re both scared to death telling you this. But we think it’s right to tell you...so...Donghae and I...aren’t just friends. To put it simply, we’re dating.” 

Silence. Everyone stared at them for a few seconds, and Donghae blushed, feeling like his heartbeat was much too loud.

“That’s a joke, right?” Kangin said.

“No,” Donghae said. Eunhyuk affirmed that it wasn’t, and the silence continued for a few more seconds.

“You’re gay? Donghae, I thought you liked girls,” Sungmin said.

“I still like girls...It’s...I like both,” Donghae said, blushing.

“Wait, wait,” Sungmin said, sitting up. “You don’t like any of us, do you?”

Eunhyuk almost laughed. “No. I haven’t liked any of you. Just him.” He motioned at Donghae. Donghae said that it was the same way.

“Oh,” Sungmin said, sinking back into the couch. “Okay.”

“It doesn’t bother you? Any of you?” Eunhyuk said, looking from one face to the next.

Heechul laughed suddenly. “Doesn’t bother me. I get drunk and kiss Hankyung.”

Hankyung moaned and slapped Heechul. “Don’t say that, it’s embarrassing,” he slurred.

“Hyung,” Ryewook said, looking directly at Donghae with a hurt expression. “Why didn’t you tell me?” 

Donghae bit his lip. “Because we agreed to not say anything until now...Back then, I didn’t...I hadn’t realized. I wasn’t trying to keep secrets from you.”

“Back then? What do you mean?” 

“I only realized that I liked him that way about a month ago,” he said, blushing, hoping that Ryeowook understood. “I’m sorry.”

“So, what? You guys are so quiet,” Eunhyuk said softly. “If it bothers you, say something.”

“It doesn’t bother me,” Sungmin said, fiddling with a lock of his hair. “I think you guys...I mean, it’s weird, right? Men don’t usually...but...I don’t know, I think it’s nice.”

They blushed. “Thank you,” they mumbled.

“It bothers me.”

They looked up at Yesung, who was looking at them with his head tilted to the side. Ryeowook’s eyes widened and he looked behind him at Yesung.

“I don’t want to see you guys together. If you think it’s okay now that you’ve come clean to everyone, think again. I don’t want to see it.”

“We hadn’t...we wouldn’t do anything in front of you guys.”

“Really? You wouldn’t even hold hands, you wouldn’t even lean against each other and whisper things around us? You don’t think we’ll notice it now? You don’t think it’ll make us sick?” 

Donghae’s heart hammered. Kyuhyun looked up at Yesung and frowned. “What’s sick about it? If it’s love, it’s love. It doesn’t bother me,” he said, looking back at Eunhyuk and Donghae and smiling.

“I don’t want to see it,” Yesung said again. “Any of it.” 

“Honestly,” Kangin said, “I don’t want to either.”

Eunhyuk sighed and glanced at Donghae. “We understand.”

“I think it’s okay,” Ryeowook said quietly. “I think it’s okay for you to show your affection.”

Eunhyuk looked at Shindong. “What about you?” 

Shindong looked at him and sighed. After a minute he answered. “It won’t change us as work friends.” 

“What about...as just friends?”

Shindong just looked at him, and Donghae slipped his hand into Eunhyuk’s. Eunhyuk met Shindong’s gaze evenly, but Donghae knew that he wasn’t that calm on the inside. Shindong opened his mouth to answer, but was cut off by Yesung abruptly walking towards the door and slamming it shut after him. They stared at the door for a few seconds as a group, and then Ryeowook stood up and went after him.

“What’s up with them, seriously?” Heechul said, lifting a corner of his mask and then quickly dropping it.

Kyuhyun shrugged. "They've been fighting since Ryeowook got back. Passive aggressive stuff. Anyway..." He looked back to Eunhyuk and Donghae. Everyone was looking at them again, looking as if they were unsure of what to say. Donghae looked down at his hands to avoid making eye contact. He felt like the tension in the room could be cut with a knife.

“Why don’t you go outside?” Eeteuk said to Eunhyuk and Donghae. “Give us some time to talk, alone, okay?” 

“Okay,” Donghae said immediately. They stood up and left, glancing behind them as they went. They closed the front door behind them and Eunhyuk leaned against the wall. Donghae leaned his head against Eunhyuk’s neck and closed his eyes.

“You’re brave,” he said quietly. “I would have gaped like a fish at them for at least a minute.”

“I’m not,” Eunhyuk said. “I just…”

“Didn’t it go well?” 

“It could have gone worse. I don’t know if...” He trailed off and stepped over to the railing, frowning slightly. He motioned Donghae over, and they looked down. Yesung and Ryeowook were standing on the stairs a story below, talking in low voices. It was hard to hear, and Donghae felt that they shouldn’t listen, but he was too curious to move away.

“-I’m suffering,” Ryeowook was saying tearfully. “I know you suffer too. I know it’s partially my fault. I know.”

“Call him and tell him you don’t need him. You don’t, Ryeowook. I made a mistake. I still want you.”

Ryeowook sobbed and looked away, crossing his arms. “For how long? Long enough for you to grow tired of me again?”  

“You think he won’t grow tired of you?”

 Eunhyuk glanced at Donghae. Donghae just shook his head slowly.

“Go to hell,” Ryeowook said. “We’re over. It’s too late. I’m not doing this with you anymore. You need to move on, too. We have to be friends.”

“You’re rejecting me?” 

Eunhyuk moved away from the railing and Donghae followed him. Eunhyuk sat down against the wall and Donghae slid down next to him. They held hands for a few seconds in silence and Eunhyuk murmured that he didn't want to hear any more. Donghae sobbed once, breaking the tension, and their tears began to fall. They held each other's hands so tightly that it was painful, but neither of them relaxed their grip at all. Donghae roughly wiped his tears away and looked at Eunhyuk. He was biting his lip and crying, looking at the space in front of them despairingly.

"I don't want this," Eunhyuk whispered. "I don't want them to fight. I don't want us to lose friends. I don't want them to view us differently."

"Do you regret telling them?" Donghae said, reaching over and brushing Eunhyuk's tears.

Eunhyuk looked at him, turning his face towards him and leaning his cheek into Donghae's palm.

"No," he whispered. "I want to be honest about you."

"It'll be okay," Donghae said, sniffing. "It will. We aren't different, and they'll see that."

"I hope so," Eunhyuk said, hugging Donghae with one arm. "But you're more important. You're always going to be more important."

Donghae hugged him, wanting to comfort him and make it so that he didn't have a reason to cry. He held him tightly, protectively, as they both cried out their stress and sorrow. He imagined having to live in the dorms with them after today and dreaded it. He didn’t want to see the others’ expressions of hidden disgust and suspicion. They would accept them with time, he believed, he knew, but it would take a long time. It wouldn’t be today or tomorrow or the next day. Even if they say it's okay, he thought, it's not yet.

And perhaps especially now that they knew, it would be impossible to see Eunhyuk, and he wanted to see him. Now that he’d tasted what life was like with him, it would never be the same without him. He couldn’t go back; he could only go forward. His best friend, his partner, his lover. His everything. He pulled back slightly and caressed Eunhyuk's face with his hand, keeping the other around him.

"I want to live with you."

They just looked at each other, and Donghae stroked his face slowly, occasionally wiping away a tear with his thumb. Eunhyuk’s expression turned to surprise as he comprehended what Donghae meant, and Donghae looked at him questioningly, his heart pounding with hope and uncertainty.

“Hyukjae,” he said, swallowing his tears. “Do you want that too?”

Eunhyuk nodded deliberately and unsmilingly. Tears rolled down his cheeks and he nodded again. He hugged him and whispered that he did. Donghae smiled, feeling a mixture of joy and sorrow. It would be better for everyone if they moved out. It would enable them to be alone together without making anyone uncomfortable. It would give the others some space to adjust to their relationship, and Donghae wanted to live with him regardless of what had just happened.

[Next Part] Chapter Nine: No Reason to Cry

Happy Days; With You: Chapter Seven

aidenrose — Tue, 23 Mar 2010 07:05:04 GMT

Title: Happy Days; With You
Part: Chapter Seven: Happy Days
Previous Parts: Prologue, Chapter One, Chapter Two, Chapter Three, Chapter Four, Chapter Five, Chapter Six
Genre: Romance
Pairing: Eunhyuk/Donghae, some Yesung/Ryeowook, Henry/Ryeowook.
Rating: PG-13 (sensuality)
Word Count: 3,521
Synopsis: Donghae returns from China and comes to realize his true feelings towards Eunhyuk in a relationship that transcends friendship.
Next Update: Saturday, August 1st (barring no extreme writer's block. You know the deal.)

Since writing about crepes last chapter, this entire week I've been craving them. So I bought some nutella, and I'm going to make crepes this weekend. @w@ Om nom nom. And wow, next update will be in August. By the way, my birthday is the same as Yesung's. Alright - please read and enjoy! ^ ^ /

Thanks to tvxqsocks as always for her support and for reading my drafts! ^^

Happy Days

Donghae spooned cereal into his mouth, checking his text messages with his other hand. Shindong and Heeechul watched him eat with confused frowns, their mouths slightly agape.

“Donghae,” Shindong said.

“Mm?” Donghae didn’t even look up.

“Did you get a girlfriend?”  

Heechul sniggered and covered his mouth, smacking Shindong’s shoulder. Donghae looked up slowly, blinking innocently at them.

“No,” he said truthfully, inwardly feeling like he was dodging bullets. It had been a few weeks since he had confessed to Eunhyuk, and he no longer blushed at the very mention of him. It took a little more than that.

“Then why are you always on your phone?”

“I’m not,” Donghae said, munching on more cereal.

“Come on, Donghae! You’re always on it. You’re always texting,” Heechul said, tapping the table with his fingertips for emphasis. “And you’re in a good mood.”

“I’m always in a good mood,” Donghae said, laughing.

“Who are you talking to?”  

“No one,” he said, drinking the milk from his bowl. He dropped his phone into his pocket and washed out the bowl in the sink. He could almost feel Heechul roll his eyes behind his back.

“C’mon,” Heechul said, standing up. “Let’s just go.”

They migrated towards the front door, Heechul banging on his door as they passed it to get Hangeng to come out. Eeteuk heard them coming and walked out on his own, pulling on a hat. They shrugged on their jackets and talked minimally. They were excited, and a little anxious; today they were going to SM Entertainment to talk about their third album. Donghae was thrilled to be starting work again. At last.

Three vans were waiting for them outside, and the other members had already gathered outside of them, some of them getting inside as Donghae and the others walked out of the building. He cast an eye towards them to see if he could spot Eunhyuk, but it seemed that he’d already gotten in. Shindong split off from them to join the others, and Donghae got into a van with the other people from his dorm.

They shut the door behind them and strapped themselves in. Heechul rested his head on Hangeng’s shoulder and looked at Donghae with pursed lips. Donghae smiled at him briefly and then looked out the window as they started driving towards SM Entertainment. It wasn’t that he was constantly on his phone, it was just that before he hadn’t had a reason to use it as much.

Usually, he didn’t get to see Eunhyuk in person. They hadn’t told anyone else about their relationship yet, and so they didn’t visit each other every day. Texting him was the only inconspicuous way to communicate. They were pretty subtle when it came to visiting, though, he thought. They basically did the same things that they did before, except that they tried to spend more time alone now.

But we have to tell them soon, Donghae thought, closing his eyes. It was getting harder to keep it a secret; harder to spend time apart. Even so, these were by far the happiest days in his life. Every day he got to spend with him, every word exchanged, every brief moment of contact with him he treasured. They’re precious.

Eeteuk started talking with Heechul and Hangeng, but Donghae didn’t hear what they talked about. He fell asleep and didn’t wake up again until they arrived at SM Entertainment and Eeteuk shook him awake.

They filed out of the vans and into the building. Donghae walked up behind Eunhyuk and Sungmin and slung an arm around each of their necks.

“Morning,” he said, smiling.

“Hi Donghae,” they said, smiling back at him.

 “Big day!” he said, clapping them both on their shoulders and skipping away to the front of the throng. He was really excited, even though today they were just going to begin talks about the next album. Eeteuk laughed as he passed him and grabbed Donghae’s collar, yanking him back by it. They walked into the meeting room and sat down to begin discussions.

Donghae leaned down to drink from the water fountain, feeling slightly wearier than before, but no less excited overall. They’d been talking all day, deciding on what they wanted to do, looking at the company’s options and plans for them. Now they were on their lunch break.

He stood up and wiped his mouth with his sleeve. Smoothing his bangs as he walked, he postponed thought about the album until he had some food. Turning two corners, he heard a voice and paused. Ryeowook…? He slowed his pace and frowned slightly. He kept laughing, talking in a low voice.

 He peered around the corner. Ryeowook was leaning against the wall, holding his cellphone to his ear and smiling. Donghae narrowed his eyes. Talking to Henry, he thought. He cleared his expression and walked out around the corner. Ryeowook glanced at him and blushed.

“I have to go,” he said into his phone as Donghae walked closer. “Yeah. Okay.”

Donghae leaned against the wall next to him, and Ryewook cancelled his call. Donghae looked at him expectantly. Ryeowook blushed and pocketed his phone.

“Who was that?” Donghae asked innocently.

 Ryeowook looked away and Donghae nudged him in the ribs.

“Henry.”

Donghae nodded and pinched his cheek. “Thought so.”

“I was just calling him to tell him about Super Junior.” 

“How are things with Yesung?”  

Ryeowook glanced at him. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

Donghae sighed. “Okay. C’mon, let’s go eat.”

Donghae already knew how things were going between them. Eunhyuk had told him that Yesung was sleeping in the same room again, but only because they got tired of finding him sleeping on the couch. They still weren’t speaking at all. Apparently they were beginning to find it old, too.

Donghae glanced at Ryeowook as they walked. He wished that Ryeowook would just have a talk with Yesung and tell him how he felt. Donghae suspected that Ryeowook had already subconsciously made a decision, and it wasn’t the one that Yesung probably wanted him to make. The longer he waited, the worse it would be.

 They walked into the room where they were eating, and Donghae made his way to where Eunhyuk was sitting with Siwon and Sungmin and hugged Siwon briefly as he passed him.

“Long time no see,” he said, reaching for a slice of pizza. He sat down between Eunhyuk and Siwon and they began to talk amongst themselves as they ate. Eunhyuk passed him a plate and Donghae glanced at him, wishing for the briefest moment that he could be alone with him. But being able to see his face was enough.

“Speaking of a long time,” Siwon said. “Kibum’s not coming?”  

“No,” Eunhyuk said. “Eeteuk said he’s busy. But he’ll record with us.”

“That’s good,” Donghae said, stuffing his mouth with pizza. “Haven’t seen him in forever.”

 “Right?” Sungmin said, leaning back and drinking water from a plastic cup. “It’d be nice if we were thirteen again.”

They all nodded in agreement. “Oh well,” Sungmin sighed.

They finished eating and threw what they’d used that was disposable away; the staff would clean the rest up. Donghae yawned and stretched and Eunhyuk poked him in the ribs.

“Ow,” Donghae said and laughed. “What was that for?” 

“Nothing,” Eunhyuk said and smiled. Donghae smacked his shoulder and they continued walking back to the meeting room, asking Eunhyuk what he thought so far.

Donghae yawned again and rubbed his eyes. Today was going to be a long day. He didn’t really enjoy this, but it was the means to an end: a new album, and Super Junior’s comeback. The fun parts would come later.

Close to six o’clock at night, they drove back to the dorms. This time Donghae rode with Eunhyuk and leaned his head against his shoulder, sleepily taking part in the conversation as they went. Eunhyuk’s phone rang and Donghae took it out of his pocket for him and handed it to him.

“Hyung,” he said, motioning for the others to be quiet. “Okay…Why our dorm? ...Fine. See you there.”

He hung up and pulled his hoodie over his eyes. The others looked at him expectantly and he explained that Eeteuk wanted everyone to eat in their dorm.

“Why?” Sungmin said.

“I dunno, I think he just wants to celebrate.”

“What are we getting?” Shindong asked.

“I dunno,” Eunhyuk said again. “I guess he’s gonna ask everyone what they want. He should just decide on something with the managers. It’ll take forever for us to decide on something.”  They laughed and agreed that it was true.

 “We should figure out what we want now...there’ll be a better chance that we’ll get it if we do,” Sungmin said, a foxlike smile on his lips.

“Good point!” Donghae said, holding up his index finger. “I want kimbap.”

Shindong clapped his hands and pointed at Donghae. “Yeah! That’s good.”

Donghae smiled and looked out the window as the others discussed it. He’d given his opinion, so he shut himself out a little bit, watching the street lights turn on and blur as they sped past them. The seatbelt felt too tight, his clothes too heavy. It was like the only comfortable part of him was where his head was touching Eunhyuk’s shoulder.

They arrived and filed out of the van. Donghae stretched and trudged upstairs with the rest of them, laughing about nothing. Sungmin opened the door to the dorm and they went inside, pulling off their shoes and jackets. They flopped down onto the furniture and awaited the arrival of the others. Donghae leaned his head back and rubbed his forehead. He was excited, but he was tired. He was happy, but his head hurt.

He closed his eyes and relaxed. Sungmin was laughing and asking them all to agree to support the idea of eating kimbap. They did, and relaxed in their own spaces until the others showed up.

The door opened with a bang and Kangin came rolling in, announcing their arrival loudly. Eeteuk came in behind him, laughing, and Donghae opened his eyes and waved at them. So loud, Donghae thought, but smiled. After five minutes, everyone had gathered into the dorm, which was spacious enough to contain them all, and the talking, laughing, and bickering about food ensued. They made their case for kimbap, but some of the others wanted jajangmyun, so in the end they ordered both things. 

The managers were with them, celebrating the first day of work on the third album. When food came, they ate it together, and when they were done the mood was even better. Some of the members drank alcohol with the managers, toasting to various things.

Donghae casually sat down next to Eunhyuk with Sungmin, and Ryeowook, Shindong, and Siwon joined them. They talked amongst themselves, reminiscing and looking forward to the future. Donghae looked around the room as Sungmin was telling a story to see what the others were doing. It looked like Heechul, Eeteuk, Kangin, and Hangeng were getting drunk. Kyuhyun and Yesung were standing and talking together, and Yesung kept glancing at Ryeowook. And, Donghae noticed with some surprise, at him and Eunhyuk. Yesung met his eyes for a second and then looked away with an almost bitter expression on his face.

Donghae blinked and returned his gaze to the people closest to him, feeling the slightest bit unsettled. He glanced at Eunhyuk, who was laughing with Shindong over something. Donghae glanced at Yesung again, feeling the smallest amount of anxiety in his chest. Why had he looked at him like that? 

Don’t think about it. He forced himself to forget it and joined the conversation again, smiling naturally. An hour passed and Donghae’s head started to throb as the room grew louder. He quietly stood up and excused himself. He walked into the bathroom, shut the door, and took a deep breath, rubbing his temples.

He turned on the faucet and washed his face. The cold water felt good. He dried his face and put his hand on the door handle, but hesitated. He didn’t really want to go back out into the noise, because it would make his head hurt more. So he walked out and down the hall to Eunhyuk’s room.

He fell backwards onto his bed and exhaled, covering his eyes with his hands. It was quiet in here; the others’ voices turned into a distant drone that he could easily block out. He turned onto his side and closed his eyes. A few minutes passed and he dozed off, his head feeling cloudy but less painful in the dark and quiet.

A pair of lips pressed against his cheek and he woke up, opening his eyes to see Eunhyuk leaning over him and smiling. The light was on again.

“You okay?” Eunhyuk said, pulling him up to a sitting position and putting a glass of water in his hand. A stab of pain shot through his right temple as he sat up and he winced. Eunhyuk sat down next to him and put an arm around his shoulders.

“Yeah,” Donghae said, raising the glass to his lips. “Headache.” 

“Is it bad?” Eunhyuk asked with a note of concern in his voice, running his hand over Donghae’s forehead.

“No,” Donghae said. “It’s slight.” He drank half of the glass and noticed how quiet it was. The dorm was silent.

“Did they leave?”

Eunhyuk nodded. “Few minutes ago. I think Heechul and Hankyung got really drunk,” he said, laughing. Donghae laughed with him, unsurprised.

 “How long has it been?” 

“Only an hour. Sungmin checked on you, but since you were sleeping…” he shrugged. “We just let you be.”

He drank all of the water and set the glass down on Eunhyuk’s nightstand. Donghae leaned his head into Eunhyuk’s shoulder and Eunhyuk hugged him, stroking his head slowly. Donghae closed his eyes. He felt better, whether it was the water, or Eunhyuk, or both. Probably both.

“Thank you,” he said quietly. Eunhyuk kissed his forehead and Donghae wrapped an arm around Eunhyuk’s waist. Eunhyuk kept on stroking his head and little by little he felt his pain ebb away.

“Do I need to leave, too?” he asked, half opening his eyes.

“Not if you don’t want to,” Eunhyuk said. “No one will care if you sleep here.”

“I don’t want to go,” Donghae whispered, closing his eyes again. Eunhyuk slipped off of the edge of the bed and kneeled down in front of him, smiling.

“So stay,” he said.

Donghae smiled and Eunhyuk reached up and brushed his bangs out of his eyes. He took Donghae’s hands, kissed him quickly, and stood up.

“Wait a few minutes, okay?” he smiled and stroked his cheek with his thumb. Donghae nodded and Eunhyuk left, closing the door behind him. Donghae sighed and got beneath Eunhyuk’s blanket, a faint blush on his cheeks. He made him feel so loved with the smallest of gestures. The briefest of kisses.

He made himself comfortable and shielded his eyes from the light. After a few minutes, Eunhyuk came back and turned off the light. He heard the click of the door closing and Eunhyuk lifted the blanket and got beneath it. He put his hands on either side of Donghae’s head and kissed him with a kind of tenderness that he adored; it made him blush and his heart raced. Butterflies in his stomach, Donghae twined his arms around his neck and kissed him back.

Eunhyuk broke off and laughed softly. Donghae pulled him closer and they kissed again, deeper this time. Then they broke off again, breathing more heavily, and Donghae blushed. They grinned at each other, and Eunhyuk propped his head up on on his elbow, looking at him with love.

Donghae ran his hand along his face, tracing the lines and contours of it. Eunhyuk’s skin was soft beneath his fingers, young and unblemished. Eunhyuk watched him as he did this with an open and trusting expression, and Donghae caught it and smiled at him. His fingers slowed and Eunhyuk lowered his head and kissed him again, sliding his arms beneath him. He’s mine, he thought. And I’m his.

“I love you,” Donghae said, holding Eunhyuk’s face between his hands gently. Eunhyuk kissed his way down to the side of Donghae’s head and put his lips to his ear.

“I love you so much,” he whispered. Donghae hugged him, feeling like his heart was overflowing with love. Eunhyuk kissed his cheek again, his lips gentle against his skin.

“Sweet dreams,” he whispered and turned onto his side. Donghae turned with him so that they were facing each other and they looked at each other through the dark.

“I wish…” Donghae whispered wistfully, "that we could sleep like this every night. I long for this.”

“Me too,” Eunhyuk said, and Donghae inched closer to him, wrapped his arm around his shoulder, and touched their foreheads together.

“I missed you,” Donghae whispered. “When I’m not with you I miss you.”

Eunhyuk closed his eyes. “Yeah,” he said softly. “I miss you too. Does your head still hurt?” 

“No,” Donghae said, smiling. “I’m excited.”

“About what?” 

“The album!”

They laughed and Eunhyuk gathered him into his arms. Donghae snuggled into him, as close as he could be, and closed his eyes, smiling. This was what he wanted. What he needed. Never before had he enjoyed the feeling of being cradled against Eunhyuk’s warm body as much. Never before had he enjoyed falling asleep holding him, his dearest, his precious person as much. He sighed, relaxing into Eunhyuk’s arms, and fell asleep in no time at all.

“I’m sorry,” Eunhyuk moaned, slapping his alarm clock. The beeping stopped and Donghae yawned and turned onto his back.

“What time is it?” he said groggily. Eunhyuk hid his face against Donghae’s shoulder.

“Six.”

“You forgot to turn your alarm off,” Donghae said, laughing a little. Eunhyuk laughed sheepishly and slung his arm over Donghae’s chest. Donghae turned over and looked at the clock as Eunhyuk readjusted himself so that he was lying along the curve of Donghae’s back.

“We don’t have to go in today,” Donghae moaned, rubbing his eyes. “We should sleep in.”

“I know...I’m sorry.” 

Donghae yawned. “It’s okay.”

After a few minutes, Eunhyuk started to laugh. Donghae opened his eyes blearily and turned his head to look at Eunhyuk.

“What is it?” he said, laughing a little just because Eunhyuk was laughing.

“Do you smell coffee?” 

Donghae blinked and sniffed the air, and he could detect the faint scent of coffee brewing. He laughed and turned back towards Eunhyuk.

 “You think someone else made the same mistake?” 

“Yeah,” Eunhyuk said, giggling. “What should we do? Should we keep sleeping or go keep them company?”  

“Can you go to sleep again?”

“Probably not,” Eunhyuk moaned regretfully. “Want to get up?”  

“Yeah,” Donghae sighed. “We might as well. It’ll be fun.”

They sat up and rubbed their eyes to clear them of sleep. Eunhyuk yawned and Donghae stole a kiss on his cheek, skipping away to the door afterwards. He looked back and they both laughed.

“Good morning,” Donghae said, smiling cutely. He opened the door and walked out towards the kitchen, Eunhyuk a few steps behind him. Donghae looked behind him and smiled as they walked. He turned his gaze back to the kitchen and his pace slowed.

It was Yesung. Donghae opened his mouth to say hello, but something stopped him. Yesung was looking at them as if he had something sour in his mouth, and it sent a shiver up his spine. Something was wrong. Donghae forced himself to smile and walked into the kitchen.

“Morning, hyung,” he said uncertainly. Eunhyuk walked in behind him and leaned against the counter, watching Yesung a little warily.

“Why are you still here?” Yesung spat at Donghae in a hushed voice, but the intensity was as if he’d shouted the words. Donghae’s eyebrows flew up, taken aback. He glanced at Eunhyuk, who looked just as surprised as he was.

“Why are you being so aggressive?” Donghae said, laughing a little.

Yesung looked away, looking no less sour. “No reason.”

“There has to be a reason, hyung,” Eunhyuk said, sitting down at the table. “What’s up?”

“It’s nothing, okay?” Yesung glared at him.

“Hyung,” Donghae said, frowning. “Knock it off. We haven’t done anything.”

“Haven’t you?” Yesung put his coffee cup down and turned his glare on Donghae. “What is it with you two?”

Donghae blinked and glanced at Eunhyuk again. Eunhyuk looked back at him soberly for a second, then he looked at Yesung, his face expressionless.

“What do you mean?” he said softly.

“That,” he said, pointing at them. “You look at each other before you answer like you’re having some kind of silent conversation. Like you’re checking to see what the other thinks before you say anything. You’re together, aren’t you?”

Donghae’s heart skipped a beat. Don’t ask that, he thought. Let us come to you. He stared at Yesung, unable to answer him.

“Aren’t you?”

[Next Part] Chapter Eight: Black Coffee and Vanilla Ice Cream

Miracle SuJu 100: 098 Soothing [WC*EunHae]

aidenrose — Tue, 23 Mar 2010 06:58:17 GMT

Miracle Super Junior 100 Challenge no. 098!
Archive Post: this
Prompt: Soothing
Pairing: Eunhyuk/Donghae
Genre: Fluff
Rating: PG
Length: One-shot / 822 words.
Synopsis: Donghae is sick with the flu and Eunhyuk cares for him, despite Donghae's protests that he might get sick too. ~~He has swine flu.~~

Ahaha XD First fic I've posted that's POV. I had a ton of fun writing this. I don't know...I like this one. Hopefully you will too! Please read and enjoy! ^ ^ /

Soothing

I turned off the water and got out of the shower, wrapping a towel around my shoulders like a cape. I was glad that the mirror was fogged over so that I couldn’t see myself. I leaned against the sink, feeling just as ill as when I got into the shower. Too low on energy and motivation to do much now that I was out of it.

Hyukjae knocked on the door and opened it. He looked at me for a second and then grabbed another towel. He covered my head with it and rubbed, drying my hair gently yet efficiently. He pulled me upright and looked at my face.

“You threw up again, huh?”

 I nodded. He looked at me sympathetically and then continued drying my hair off. He told me to finish drying my body and turned on the hair dryer. His fingers gentle, he blow dried my hair, somehow almost caressing me as he did so.

“C’mon.” He pulled me out by the hand and sat me down, going to get my clothes. He threw me a pair of boxer shorts, sweatpants, and a t-shirt and told me to get dressed so that I didn’t get cold. He went back into the kitchen, giving me privacy to dress myself.

When he came back I crawled back onto the bed and flopped down on it, sighing. I was sick and tired of being sick. Hyukjae prodded me and I got beneath the blanket. He readjusted the pillow beneath me and tucked the blanket in around my shoulders, smoothing it out. I felt awful.

“You sure you won’t go to the hospital?” he asked me for the second time, looking at me with concern.

“I’ll be fine,” I said, looking up at him. He put a hot washcloth on my forehead and I closed my eyes, finding instant relief in it. He sat down next to me and stroked my hair, his fingers gentle and caring.

“You can go home if you want to,” I said weakly. “Think about all the germs you’re breathing in.” 

“I’m fine. I’d rather stay here with you than go home and worry about you.”

I sighed. “Thank you.”

“Does that feel any better?”

I nodded and made a small noise in my throat. But I couldn’t stop shivering. He stopped stroking my hair and touched my temple gently with his fingertips. Then he pulled back the blankets and got in bed with me and hugged me, sliding one arm beneath my neck and the other across my chest.

He snuggled his head into my neck, resting it on my shoulder, and I took a deep breath, relaxing. I’d been sick all day with the flu, but it didn’t scare him off. He’d stayed with me the entire time and helped me as much as he could, forcing me to eat and drink, making me stay in bed all day. He even stayed with me while I slept, because whenever I awoke he was there. Now he was being affectionate with me while I had a fever that sent such violent chills through me that my teeth chattered and my muscles hurt.

“I don’t want you to get sick,” I whispered, too late. I was letting myself be selfish. I wanted him more than anything else right now. I didn’t want him to get sick, but I wanted him to stay with me even more.

“It’s fine,” he said with a note of finality that told me not to protest again. My heart overflowed with love for this person who didn’t care if he caught my virus, just to comfort me when I was feeling bad. After awhile I stopped shivering as much. I felt calmer, more at ease. He soothed me just by touching me.

“I love you,” I said. “You know?”

“I know,” he said softly, holding me tightly. “I love you, too.”

“Next time you get sick...I’m definitely doing this much for you.”

“I wouldn’t expect anything less.”

“I’d say I’d do more, but I don’t think anything more can be done.”

“Aww,” he said. “You think I’m that good for you?” 

“You’re the best,” I breathed.

“Go ahead and hug me, then,” he said quietly, removing the cloth from my head and putting it on the nightstand. I turned onto my side and hugged him, burying my face in his shoulder. I breathed easily, my pain melting away bit by bit from the close contact with him. He hugged me to his body, stroking my back with a hand and murmuring sweet things in a low voice to me.

I closed my eyes. I concentrated on his chest moving as he breathed; an easy, regular, subtle motion that I nonetheless adored. My favorite sounds in the world were the sounds of him breathing and his heartbeat, and I could hear both right now. Half-smiling, I fell asleep to them.

Happy Days; With You: Chapter Six

aidenrose — Tue, 23 Mar 2010 06:55:59 GMT

Title: Happy Days; With You
Part: Chapter Six: It's You
Previous Parts: Prologue, Chapter One, Chapter Two, Chapter Three, Chapter Four, Chapter Five
Genre: Romance
Pairing: Eunhyuk/Donghae, some Yesung/Ryeowook, Henry/Ryeowook.
Rating: PG-13 (sensuality)
Word Count: 2,759
Synopsis: Donghae returns from China and comes to realize his true feelings towards Eunhyuk in a relationship that transcends friendship.
Next Update: Saturday, July 25th (barring no extreme writer's block. You know the deal.)

PLEASE READ THIS (IMPORTANT): The wait is over! =D So...I'm going to tell you how long this series is going to be now. Eleven chapters, plus the prologue. That means we're halfway done. ;_; I hope that seems like a good length to all of you...Thank you for all of your support, and I hope that you enjoy this chapter. ♥ By the way, I totally adore nutella. Mmmm. *w* Okay. Please read and enjoy! ^ ^ /

Thanks to tvxqsocks for her help in brainstorming, reading my drafts, listening to my ideas, and helping me to edit. ♥

It's You

Donghae looked at him and wiped his eyes, taking a few shaky deep breaths.

“Hyukjae,” he said again.

“My god, what’s wrong?” Eunhyuk said, taking a step forward.

“I like you,” Donghae sobbed.

“What?” Eunhyuk stopped and looked at him in confusion.

There was a pause in which they stared at each other. Then Eunhyuk laughed. “I like you too. We’re friends, right?”  

Donghae closed his eyes. “It’s not like that,” he said quietly, sliding down the door. He looked up at him and made no attempt to wipe his tears away anymore. “I always thought that no matter who I met, no matter who I became friends with, no matter who I loved...you’d always come first, because you’re my best friend. I always thought that the reason I want to be with you is because we’re best friends. I met you and we just clicked. Don’t you remember?”

Eunhyuk nodded. He looked uncomfortable, like he didn’t know what to do with himself, caught between staying where he was and running to Donghae to wipe his tears away and comfort him.

“Hyukjae,” he whispered. “I can’t stop thinking about you. Do you understand?” 

Eunhyuk shook his head.

“I like you. Everyday I think about you, I want to see you, I want to be with you. I like…everything about you.”

“D...Donghae…” Eunhyuk took a step closer and kneeled down. “Stop crying.” 

“I can’t...you d-don’t know how scared I am.”

  “Why are you scared?”

“Because I like you as if you were a girl.” Donghae looked directly at him. Eunhyuk's eyes widened and he looked at him disbelievingly, tears pooling in his eyes.

“What?” he whispered.

“Don’t...don’t say that you don’t like me,” Donghae sobbed and his head fell onto his knees. He hugged himself. “Don’t say you don’t like me because I like you.”

Suddenly Eunhyuk started sobbing and he covered his mouth with his hand. “You like me like that?” 

Donghae looked up, his face red and tear-streaked. “I love you,” he whispered.

Eunhyuk crawled forward and gently lifted Donghae’s face. “Say it again.” 

“I love you,” Donghae sobbed. Eunhyuk kissed him, caressing his face in his hands. Donghae stopped crying for an instant out of shock and kissed him back, his entire body flushing. Happiness and surprise flooded through him and he closed his eyes, tears flowing out beneath his eyelids and mingling with Eunhyuk’s, this time crying out of an entirely different emotion. He loved this. Shyly he lifted his hands and touched Eunhyuk’s neck.

After a few seconds they broke apart, gasping for breath, and Eunhyuk held him closely. Donghae pressed his face into Eunhyuk’s shoulder and hugged him.

“I thought you didn’t...” Eunhyuk choked, his voice thick with tears. “I thought you never would…”

Donghae closed his eyes tightly, unable to stop crying. He’d kept it in for a day and felt terrible. How long had Eunhyuk kept it secret? Had he been so oblivious while Eunhyuk suffered? “I do,” he whispered. Eunhyuk pulled back slightly so that he could look Donghae in the eyes. He gently stroked the side of Donghae's face with his fingertips.

“I love you,” Eunhyuk said, his voice shaking slightly. “Donghae, I love you.”

Donghae wiped Eunhyuk’s tears away as his own vision blurred with tears. Love. They looked at each other for a few seconds, smiling. Then Eunhyuk leaned forward and kissed Donghae’s tears away. Donghae entwined his fingers with Eunhyuk’s. They kissed again, almost shyly, new to the sensation.

“It feels like a dream,” Eunhyuk said softly against his lips, running his fingers through Donghae’s hair. He pulled Donghae to him again, wrapping his arms protectively around him. “And that I’ll wake up and this will never have happened.” 

Donghae held him as tightly as he could without hurting him. He could feel Eunhyuk’s heart racing next to his own. “We’re awake.”

“I know,” he said. Donghae felt him smile. “This is real, isn’t it?” 

“It took me this long and a trip to China to realize it, but...it’s you,” Donghae said softly, apologetically.

“It’s you,” Eunhyuk echoed.

Donghae smiled. This felt so right, being able to show their affection without restraint, saying that they loved each other. He felt like his heart would expand out of chest, he was so filled with happiness. Eunhyuk buried his face against Donghae’s neck, his wet eyelashes brushing Donghae’s skin. They stayed like that for a few minutes, just holding each other. Then Donghae gently pulled away and picked up a bottle of water. He opened it and put it into Eunhyuk’s hand.

“Drink,” he said, laughing. “You’ll get dehydrated...look at you, you cried so much.”

Eunhyuk raised the bottle to drink, but he met Donghae’s eyes and laughed. He wiped his eyes, smiling at Donghae. “You know…” he paused and drank a quarter of the bottle. “Today is the happiest day of my life.”

Donghae looked at him, speechless. The happiest day?

 “How long have you liked me?” Donghae asked quietly.

“Since I met you,” he said, blushing. “Off and on for a while. I tried pushing you away, because I thought you’d never be attracted to me. Clearly, that didn’t work,” he ended in almost a whisper.

Eunhyuk shyly looked down and drank more water. Donghae wordlessly slipped his arms around Eunhyuk’s neck and hugged him. Eunhyuk wrapped one arm around Donghae’s waist, using the other to rehydrate himself.

“I’m sorry I didn’t realize sooner,” Donghae said softly. “I think I’ve always been in love with you. I just never...considered this kind of love a possibility.” 

“Thank you.” 

“For what?” 

“Feeling the same.”

They both laughed, and Eunhyuk set the bottle down so he could hug him with both arms. “I wanted to tell you so many times how much I like you,” Eunhyuk said.  

“But we...we don’t really need to say anything to know, do we?” 

“No.”

“It seems ridiculous now, but I’m sorry about this morning. I really didn’t know how to face you,” he laughed.

“I wondered what was up,” Eunhyuk said. “I didn’t understand at all. But if you took a year to confess this and avoided me the entire time, I’d still...”

“Really?” 

“Yes.”

Donghae’s heart skipped a beat. He’d wait through a year of being avoided by Donghae, as well as the years they’d known each other before, and still accept him when he confessed?

“Thank you,” he said quietly. He was touched. Would he do the same for Eunhyuk? To be able to hold this person, yes. He could wait. They let go of each other and sat side by side against the wall.

“Hyukjae,” he said quietly. Eunhyuk looked at him. “Are we…” Donghae broke off and blushed bright red.

“What?” 

“Are we…” Donghae stalled again, looking incredibly shy and uncertain. “A couple?”

Eunhyuk blushed and laughed, covering his mouth with a hand. “You’re so cute.” Donghae laughed with him, hiding his face in his hands.

“Yeah,” Eunhyuk said, looking at them in the mirror. “I don’t know what else to call this.”

“Eunhae,” Donghae said, smiling. They laughed again. “We always said that. I thought it was just a joke.”

“It was, back then.” 

After a few seconds of silence, Eunhyuk broke it. “What do we do now? You don’t want to go back to the dorms yet, right?” 

“Right,” Donghae said, blushing. He wanted to stay with Eunhyuk. “Let’s just stay a little longer, okay?”

Eunhyuk nodded and slipped his hand into Donghae’s. Blushing, they held each other's hands. They both wanted to. Dorms. Beneath all of the joy, questions were beginning to pop into his head. What would the other members think of them? How would tell them? Would they tell them? How would they manage, living in the dorms? What, Donghae blushed, would life be like living with Eunhyuk as his lover?

“Hyukjae…” he looked at him. “Should we tell the others?”

Eunhyuk leaned his head back against the wall, looking at the ceiling. “I don’t know,” he said honestly. “I don’t want to lie to them.”

“Yeah,” Donghae nodded. “I don’t want to either.”

 “I think we should tell them,” Eunhyuk said quietly. “Even though...I think that some of them might not like it.”

Donghae bit his lip. “But they’re our friends. It’ll be okay after a while. Right?”

“Probably,” Eunhyuk said. “I hope so.”

Donghae leaned his head against Eunhyuk’s shoulder and closed his eyes. Eunhyuk leaned his head against his and Donghae smiled. He enjoyed this so much.

“When should we tell them?” Eunhyuk asked quietly.

“Let’s wait...I want to...be with you without any drama for a while.” 

Eunhyuk kissed his hand, causing Donghae to blush and smile. “Okay.”

“What should we do now?” Donghae wondered aloud, although he really didn’t want to do anything else. He was completely content to sit here hand-in-hand with Eunhyuk. But his conscience was beginning to prick him, reminding him that they were using - or rather, not using - a company dance studio.

“I’m hungry.”

 “Me too.”

“Let’s go eat something,” Eunhyuk said without making any move to get up.

“What do you want?” Donghae asked. “I want...I want a crepe.”

“A crepe?” Eunhyuk laughed. “Okay.”

Eunhyuk stood up, pulling Donghae to his feet with him. They smiled at each other and then Donghae reluctantly moved away to retrieve his iPod. Eunhyuk put the water bottles back to the bag. Donghae dropped his iPod into it and Eunhyuk slung it across his chest.

“Okay,” Eunhyuk smiled. “Let’s get cleaned up and go.”

Eunhyuk walked over to open the door, but Donghae grabbed his hand and pulled him back into an embrace.

“Hyukjae,” he grinned. “I’m so happy.” 

“Me too.”

They left, a silent agreement between them to not give away what had happened by holding hands or exchanging looks. Inconspicuous and quiet, Eunhyuk threw Donghae his change of clothes from the bag, and they went their separate ways.

“You know you still haven’t returned my clothes, right?” Eunhyuk said as they approached his car.

 Donghae blushed and sent him an apologetic glance as he opened the car door and got inside. “I meant to give them back to you today, but I forgot.”

 “It’s not like I mind or anything,” Eunhyuk laughed, throwing the bag into the back seat.

“It’s an excuse to cross dorms now, right?”

  “Right,” Eunhyuk said softly.

They put their seat belts on, Eunhyuk put his keys into the ignition, and they left. This time they didn’t use the radio; Donghae pointed out trivial things on the way, talking together easily once again.

How funny, thought Donghae, that this isn’t awkward. They’d known each other and been so close for so long that it wasn’t strange between them, taking a further intimate step in their relationship. They were talking as they always had. He looked out the window and blushed. But it was different. He smiled. Different in a good way.

Eunhyuk parked outside of a park and they got out, putting on sunglasses. “This is the right park, right?” 

“Yup,” Donghae nodded, walking across the grass towards the center. Children played here with their parents and siblings. It was the weekend. Eunhyuk locked his car and caught up with Donghae. Donghae glanced at him shyly, smiling. He wanted to hold his hand, but he didn’t. Not in public.

They found the vendor that sold crepes and got in line, talking in low voices until it was their turn. Donghae ordered a crepe with nutella and Eunhyuk got one with nutella and strawberries. Donghae paid for them and they sat down beneath a tree.

“Oh my god,” Eunhyuk said in a muffled voice. “This is so good.” 

Donghae laughed. “It’s delicious. I love this stuff.”

“The chocolate.”

 “Nom.”

“We have to buy some of this,” Eunhyuk laughed.

  “We do. I wonder where you can get it.”

“I don’t know, but we’ll find someplace.”

Donghae nodded. He crumpled the aluminum foil that the crepe had been wrapped in into a ball and watched two small children play with their pet dog. He loved dogs, but he couldn’t keep one right now because of work. Eunhyuk waved a hand in front of his face. He blinked and looked at him. Eunhyuk smiled. “Are you ready to go back?” 

Donghae shook his head. “We live on different floors. When we go back, I won’t be able to see you.”

 “Why? We always go between floors.”

“I know,” Donghae sighed. “It’s not the same thing, though. I want time just with you. Let’s just...talk.”

So they did. For hours, they talked incessantly about everything as the fancy to took them. It started drizzling and Donghae checked the time on his cellphone. It was almost four in the afternoon. Reluctantly, he looked at the rain bouncing off of the sidewalks. Neither of them had an umbrella with them. He shut his phone and put it into his pocket.

“Okay,” he sighed. “Let’s go before this rain gets really thick.”

He stood up and pulled Eunhyuk to his feet. Donghae took both of their wrappers and tossed them into a garbage can.

“Ready?”

Donghae nodded and they ran towards the car in the rain. It was still light, so they didn’t get too wet, but it was fun. As they got into the car it began to rain more heavily and they laughed. Donghae reached into the back seat and took out a towel. He reached over, ignoring Eunhyuk’s laughing protests, and dried off his face and hair. Then he wrapped the towel around his own head and sunk down into the seat as Eunhyuk started the car.

“How tinted are your windows?” Donghae asked quietly. Eunhyuk had parked inside of the apartment complex’s garage and they were sitting there in the dark, listening to the rain.

“They’re tinted really darkly.” 

“Makes sense, in case some fans look over and see you driving or something,” Donghae said, nodding.

“Exactly.”

“So they’re so tinted that you can’t see what’s going on behind them from the outside?” 

Eunhyuk blushed. “Right.”

Donghae unbuckled his seat belt and leaned over. He hugged Eunhyuk with one arm and released his seat belt with the other. Eunhyuk turned towards him and hugged him.

“Thank you so much,” Donghae whispered, closing his eyes. Eunhyuk made a soft noise, between accepting and dismissing his thanks, instead of speaking any actual words.

Donghae pulled back the slightest bit, and Eunhyuk tilted his head and kissed him, gently cupping his face in his hands. Donghae’s heart raced. Why hadn’t he realized sooner? He felt like they’d been missing out all this time. He wrapped his other arm around Eunhyuk’s neck and leaned into the kiss.

They broke off slowly, painfully, and held onto each other for a while. “I don’t want to leave,” Eunhyuk said softly.

“Me neither. I’ll text you.”

“’Kay.”

They kissed again, neither of them in any hurry to leave.

“Is your heart racing?” Donghae asked between kisses.

“Yeah.”

“We should go,” Donghae said, laughing, and kissed his cheek. He gently pulled away, leaned in again to kiss him, and then reluctantly got out of the car. Eunhyuk followed suit, bringing his bag with him.

Donghae looked at it. “Don’t bother giving me my stuff back now. I’ll bring you your clothes later and get it then.”

Eunhyuk smiled behind his hand. “Okay. You’re still blushing.”

“Shoot,” Donghae muttered, touching his cheek. His face felt hot. Eunhyuk laughed. They walked into the building and to their respective floors. Donghae lingered on the stairs above Eunhyuk’s front door, walking up them backwards. Eunhyuk watched him go. Donghae didn’t want to leave. He didn’t want to say goodbye. But he did.

“Bye bye,” he said, waving. Eunhyuk waved back. Donghae turned around and walked up to his dorm, looking through the banister at Eunhyuk as long as he could. Stupid dorms, he thought.

He unlocked the door to his dorm soberly and walked inside, kicking off his shoes and announcing his return halfheartedly.

“Hey,” Hangeng said, looking up. “You’re back. How was dance practice?”  

Donghae blinked. “It was great.” 

“Good,” Hangeng said. “You were gone a long time.”

“Yeah,” Donghae scratched his head. “We got something to eat.” 

Hangeng nodded and returned to whatever it was that he was doing. Donghae went to his room and flopped down on the bed. What a day. He grinned and rolled onto his side, replaying everything in his head. So happy.

[Next Part] Chapter Seven: Happy Days